What can IOS 11 do better?

>>739282093
holy shit this actually works, thx OP

If anyone can come up with something I have some photoshop skill so we can make this a reality.

Come on /b/ let's get back to our roots.

>>739282820
when's the last time you fired up a shoop thread?

Please make this a thing.

Its has to
1. Guarantee the phone's destruction.
2.Claim to enhance improve the phone/ the users life.
3.Have some bullshit science behind it that the average iPhone retard would believe.

Is there any way to damage the camera like tricking people to shine a bright light into it somehow? It'd be believable to do something with the camera given all the work Apple has been putting into cameras on their phones recently.

>>739283178

Yeah we all know that. The real question is what 'feature' can we come up with?

I know this may sound stupid
But
maybe something to do with magnets.

>>739283145
it already was a thing

Well, it's reported that the new iPhones will be all glass, so the new prank should have the result cracking/destroying the phone. Maybe we could say it's solar powered so people should throw it up in the air to get more battery life.

>>739283391
I doubt most people have a magnet strong enough to destroy an iPhone

>>739283393

He means make this thread a thing.

Aka, we should do something similar again.

>>739283444

This isn't believable enough sadly.

ez pz waterproof feature iphone users are dumb enough to believe a software update can implement waterproofing

>>739283460
>>739283391

Magnets will do absolutely nothing to an iPhone or any phone. Everything uses solid state storage now so magnets have no affect on anything.

>>739283555
Hasn't that been done before ?

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>>739283520
Yeah...
>tfw new /b/ is more slow with their trolls

>>739283555

iPhone 7 and 7+ already have water resistance so this wouldn't work on the newer models.

We need something that will destroy all iPhones.

>>739283622
it has

>>739283520
All the good ones have pretty much been done though. How about flipping the phone to charge it with kinetics?

Charge twice as fast via plugging a usb charger ( wall outlet to computer) then the sun (ios usb from computer to phone) fry the computers usb port

>>739283704
That only works with round things.

What if we make it fireproof?

I've got it /b/, what if we tell them you can remove the glass backcover and enable wireless charging. How do we get them to break the glass backcover?

>>739283704
The "iThrow"

>>739283704

We could then talk about how the Taptic Engine has been updated to also receive kinetic motion rather than just produce it!

That would work because Apple has been talking about their haptic engine for a while.

>>739283762
Most people don't know that

>>739283779
That actually sounds believable to a level
we might wanna work on that

What if we say it's fireproof?

>>739283781
>>739283818
Yes. This is starting to go somewhere.

Maybe something like iPhone heat. Where it'll claim that if you put your phone close enough to a fire or other heat source it will use the thermal energy to charge your iPhone

>>739283704
Interesting thought.
What if we made a gof of somebody throwing their phone up in the air while having it spin really fucking fast and then check their screen and it is charged.
We would have to say something about how it can't be in a case though and that alone would likely give it away

>>739283953
That is the same premise as the "Iwave"

>>739283953
Maybe we could trick people into burning their screens with lighters to cause permanent pixel damage.

We could convince them to take a knife under their screen, take it off and make them think you can "clean" it and get extra resolution.

Is there a way to make Iphones vibrate continuously. If there is then we would say the vibrations combined with the upward momentum could charge the phone.

>>739283967

We need it to look like it was made by Apple.

Apple would never use a gif like that.

>>739283967
The idea is that they throw it up into the air spinning it and the phone fucking shatters. Also no case would be necessary.

i'd say keeping it simple is the best;
something like "drop proof case",
or "safeshell" which can be run over without breaking it.

other approach:
securepic function:
"auto-scensorship" of nudity on social media

idunno...

>>739284031
This is a pretty dope idea.
"Just hold the lighter to your screen for 1 minute" and your phone will be fully charged"
"ifire" and make sure to include some fire emojis or some stupid shit

>>739284031
This could work

>>739284131
this.

>>739284028
Ehh it's bears a close resemblance. Iwave claimed to charge a phone with electromagnetic waves though (or some bullshit like that)

>>739283779
Let's work on this /b/ sounds the most believable

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>>739284031
That I would not believe who would take a lighter to their phone to obvious
>>739284048
That I could understand but don't put knife in the add
>>739284082
yeah only on those weird sex apps

>>739283967
What if we told them to take a screwdriver, center it perfectly over the apple logo, spin it and tell them it will give them battery life instantly. We could even say that you can put aluminium foil in the drilled hole.

>>739284135
It would be even better for the iPhone 8 because it's rumored to have an OLED screen! Those types of screens don't recover from burn in at all. LCD screens can survive a couple seconds, but we will just make them do it longer.

>>739284135
That mightn't work but using emojis would really help

>>739284135

We can't use emoji or a name like 'iFire' it needs to sound professional and Apple like. The idea sounds promising but because of the ridiculous nature of burning your iPhone every other aspect must be professional and convincing.

>>739284028
Ehh it's bears a close resemblance. Iwave claimed to charge a phone with electromagnetic waves though (or some stupid bullshit like that)

Software update turns phone into scales. The new software can read electromagnetic pressure on the screen and convert that to weight. Watch the fat fucks break all their screens.

>>739284247
How about iFlash
or iFlame

This thread is hopeless. None of these ideas are going to work, iPhone owners aren't this dumb. We need to think of something actually believable.

Also another thought, why are we limiting ourselves to iPhone, why don't we try something with maybe Samsung as they now have a user base that rivals apples.

>>739283773
underrated

>>739283145
LURK MOAR YOU NEW FAGGOT

>>739284382
iFlash sounds applelike

>>739284131
The tough case could work!

>>739284247
Agreed
"iheat"

>>739284382
Nothing with the "i" in it. Look at their recent products. They have been pushing out stuff that begins with Apple like the Apple pencil and the Apple watch. They only use the "i" on stuff that was named already

>>739284433
checked

>>739284433

>NEW FAGGOT
>being such a newfag you don't know how to say newfag
>kek

>>739284510
'i' is really synonymous with apple though, it helps bring in the apple fags I guess.

>>739284422
What could we do to samsung users that wouldn't work on an iphone?

Hold it in Fire, so the case turns in rainbow colours

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>>739284510
Ahhh thanks haven't done any of these in a while.

>>739284131
The nudes blocking function could work. Everyone would post their nudes because they will think that it recognizes naked body and blocks from posting it.

Ok here is the plan
iFire
1: Hold a lighter to the screen for 20 seconds to 1 minute
2: Your battery will process the heat energy and convert it into charge for your phone
3: Spread this everywhere
4:????
5:profit?

>>739284566
Someone makes a Trojan that locks their phone. iPhones would be harder

>>739284562
Not so much anymore. Look at the way Apple has been marketing lately. That's the important thing. Think of something like the Apple Heat or Apple Thermocharge

>>739284592
You know that could ''slightly'' work we could say the oils in the phone react to heat or to add to it the heat cleans the phone?

>>739282093
Soil energy(burry it or put sand or some shit up charging hole)

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>>739284646
will never work.
waterproof ok,
microwave ok,
hidden stuff on the inside ok,
but holding an open flame against your phone and promoting it as an official apple function?
will. not. work.

nudefilter and tough case have potential,
the rest is too much over the top.

>>739284646
I'm in on this plan

The nudefilter or bioenergy from the ground

>>739284670
I guess the idea that has persisted is that the phone users intentionally ruin their phone. A Trojan would work, but it isn't exactly calling out the stupidity of people.

>>739284741
Building on this. Say that holding a lighter to cracks or scratches on the phone screen causes a "nanothermo reaction with the oleophobic layer in the iPhone screen causing the crystals in the glass to repair any damage" I mean make it sound better and more sciency and we could be on to something? Screen damage is like the main thing people need to fix iPhones for.

>>739284909
If you remobe the camera glass you can habe x ray technology:DDDD

>>739285043
This

>>739285043
That isn't as dumb of an idea as it sounds

>>739285043

I'm actually convinced by this that there are 14 year olds on here.

>the spelling
>the emoticon
>the phrasing

>>739285043
infrared photgraphy by removing lens!
x ray is too crazy, keep it realistic

>>739284848
Maybe like that it is proven for soil to have energy from being exposed to sunlight and that it makes iPhone pick up that energy,maybe include some quotes from CEO and that it is used to prevent global warming by not consuming electricity from normal chargers

>>739285156
YES!

>>739284342
Hasn't this been done?

>>739285159
You must be new here

>>739284848
Could be onto something here

How about iBent....it's flexible right now. If it bend...put it in she sun en it will be rebuild

>>739285156
I dont get it. Why is this funny?

>>739285420
been done already newfag

>>739284848
YES!!!

Wouldn't some general 'lifehack' work better? Say for example put some sand on lens, a bit of water and rub for 3 mins. Takes clearer pictures just like a new phone without all the debris on the lens.

>>739282820
Are you still here?

>>739285478
True but it has to look convincing

>>739285459
People post free nudes on their account.
Neckbeards rejoyce.

>>739285156
This. As much as I like the idea of people burning their phones this is the most believable for a software update

>>739285156
This is the stupidest fucking idea ever.
Nobody is going to fall for this and you are all gonna look like retards for sharing it.

>>739285481

Yes but nothing here seems very good yet. Lurking until I see something good.

>>739285626
And let's be honest, who wouldn't want to see nudes of a person whom they know?

new fags with shit ideas. heres what we do:
screen is shatterproof. you anons decide where we go with this.

The iFire idea is hopeless.
Wave worked so well because you could alctually explain it using fake science that iPhone users are too stupid to comprehend as fake.

We need something like that again, something crazy enough to make people try it, but realistic enough that people will believe it.

>>739285696
It won't work. Nobody is going to try to take nudes and post them. You know why? Because they don't need the feature in the first fucking place if they just don't try to post their nudes to social media.
This idea is so fucking stupid I am raging

>>739285702

>newfags
Yup I agree
>shit ideas
Yes, finally someone smart. So what is your idea?
>shatterproof screen
God dammit, newfag why

>>739285745
What is something we can plug an Iphone into that will destory it or something we can put an iphone in the will destroy it?
Lets start there and work our way up

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>>739285782
>thinking that society wouldnt test it out
>thinking normies have some sense

iECO, charging with vinegar or lemon

>>739285782
Kinda agree with you but they would want to see if the function is real

This is a shit idea but maybe somebody can work with the idea or it will inspire something.
"iballon" tie your phone to a ballon and let it go into the air. It will comeback down with a weather report for your area

Putting vinegar and baking soda in the charging port ?

>>739285980

>iPhones too heavy
>balloons too hard to get

>>739285886
Exactly.
This normie fags hear the word "newdz" and lose all common sense. Fucking retards

>>739286073
I know, I know. I'm just brainstorming here. Maybe my idea will spark a better one.

>>739286076

You guys really need to get over yourselves. 'Normies' aren't this dumb, we need something that'll actually trick people

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Should we bring /g/ into this they could maybe help?

THIS is good old /b/

If you put a fork into the wall socket and have the phone in the other hand, the electricity goes through you and buffers safely in the phone

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>>739282093
suck money from the general population

>>739286158
No no you misunderstand me the normies on 4chan are stupid for thinking that that idea would work. The normies here hear the word "newdz" and then are willing to fucking tey anything no matter how dumb the idea is

>>739286076
It would be a software update called apple privacy. Even if you post nude images the software in your phone will detect that and instantly take the photo down so you don't have to. Works with Snapchat stories, Instagram, Facebook or Twitter.

>>739286158
>arent this dumb
They stuck their phones in fucking microwaves

Any tech-faggs here? What can destroy a smartphone who everyone has at home?

>>739286158
>People drilled into the iphone7 thinking it had a headphone jack

People are unfortunatley that stupid anon.

Put an iphone it a pot of boilng hot water. The bubbles or heat or some shit charge it.
"ibubble"

Talk about how the new iphone is infact water proof and this feature was developed to work with its water proof function

I'm bumping for the nudes idea

>>739285156
This sounds great, IPhone fags would eat it up.

>>739286267
I stopped reading half way through the first sentence.
No. It won't work.
Shutup faggot

>>739286378
Not bad.

phones are full of bacteria.

"the new GermX function"

boil 2 minutes in water

>>739286355

You're just proving my point more. If you really think people did that you are the thickest person on this planet. People 'drilling their iphones' was a joke that no one seriously did except for YouTubers

>>739286447
Just trying to get the ball rolling, faggot

>>739282093
I got one: solar charging

Leave your iPhone in the sun to let it charge, with the screen up. For faster charging, use a magnifying glass

>>739286447
>it wont work
>doesnt say why it wont
You come up with something, you worthless faggot

It magnetizes to your hand so people dro it

Some one get the /g/ techfags in here

>>739283444
Using bleach or amonia to bring up the surface to a lovely shine?

This thread is just depressing. A bunch of newfags who think they can trick people with these awful ideas. Good luck guys but this'll never work.

>>739286378
>>739286519
Guyz... Legit though...

>>739286725
We're getting somewhere anon

>>739286630
I have mentioned about 5 different ideas in the thread as well as told you exactly why it won't work.
Keep up with the posts little bitch

>>739286378
Somebody tell me why this wouldn't work because i think it might be the best idea so far

What if we told them the phone can wirelessly charge through the electricity in the coils of stoves that use resistance heating?

>>739282093
>connect car battery to shell of iphone, claim it actually uses the waves of electric frequency to harden the screen and shell of the iPhone so it makes it 100x more durable

>>739286725
Newfags that call people newfags are newfags let the 12 year old kids in this thread have fun

What about something to do with Kill USB's? Post a tutorial/instructions on how to build one, tell everyone it charges the IPhone instantly, they destroy their phone. Although getting the average person to unknowingly build a Kill USB probably won't work. I'm just brainstorming.

>>739283779
Let's say all you have to do is score the back in the shape of energy to make the connection better

How about iCryo, put your phone in a freezer for six hours to induce a hard-reset into your lithium-ion polymer iPhone battery, causing it to grant the phone 15-20% extra battery life.

>>739282093
Steal money out of the pockets of Apple fanbois?

>>739286973
Car batterys are to hard to find.
Dumbass kids would ask their parent for help and they would out an end to that shit

>>739286973
not only that, but it can fully charge it in 1 minute from dead

>>739286999

So by that logic you are a newfag

>>739287060
To add, freezing a phone for long periods of time causes great damage.

>>739287060
Youd have to name it something like "Apple freeze" or "Apple chill" but could work

>>739287060
>>739287132
Actually not that bad.
best i've heard so far

>>739287110
Correct if ur not moot or snacks ur not a oldfag #ripsnacks

>>739287060
This could work. Freezers are convenient

>>739287158
Apple Chill, because the 15yo's will think it sounds cool

>>739287158
Arctic Apple, Apple Frost, Apple Chill-Bit

>>739287158
Apple iCE, CE stands for CryoEnergy

>>739287080
Yes, but the main demographic of this would probably be stupid fucking cunts with shitty pontiacs that vote hillary

>>739287060
I'm in.
Can someone confirm this breaks the phone though?

>>739287275
I like the name. (Idea Poster)

>>739287275
Brilliant

>>739287275
Ayyyyy lmao

So, do we all agree on the apple iCE idea?

>>739282093
Dayum, gona try this asap!

>>739287387
Yes

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sounds good
maybe we can trick them into beliefe that it would increase the capacity of the battery

>>739287387
Yes. but we have to confirm that it breaks the phone

http://www.strawpoll.me/13468431

>>739287300
Freezing a phone apparently does great damage to screens, we'd have to polish it off though. Add some extra details, maybe say shit like "If the iPhone does not turn on after twenty minutes of freezing, place it gently on low wattage into your microwave, so that the heat may alleviate and speed up the defrosting process of the ions within the lithium battery" or some other shit, just to insure it. It has been used before, but if you use "low wattage" and "for a short period of time", it could work. (idea author)

>>739287132
>>739287481

>>739282093
Report thoughtcrime.

>>739285159
>Summer

Just leave

>>739287507
Or even a high-heat oven, because remember, cold and instant heat does not mix well. Things crack.

>>739284646
This is too stupid to work.
...

It might just work.

Have them freeze it in a block of ice

I got one: put your iPhone in the toaster, it helps make the case the screen more durable.

We'll call it the iToast

>>739287132
I like this the best, extend battery life by freezing the battery juice overnight.

>>739287507
Or the tutorial just says, turn your phone off and put it in the freezer for at least 3 hours. If it fails at some point, simply put it in boiling water to reverse the functionality.

>>739284031
That could be really good
But putting fire on screen seems too obvious
What about putting the fire in the charger port for about idk, a minute
Then you can trick people to fucking up their charger ports

Isn't it better to release AppleICE with the new Iphone8? Its more believeble than a software update

>>739287767
Exactly! Remember that iPhone 7 is waterproof, so putting it in boiling water will not damage the phone (wink wink), and seeing as the phone has been frosted, the heat wouldn't either.

>>739282093


If we start with the pseudo-science - I really like the idea of kinetic/haptic charging. (Like self-winding watches). IE shaking the phone somehow charges it.

So through a software update, the vibrate motor works in reverse as a generator when you shake it repeatedly. There's just enough real science in the idea to make this believable.

Now - the REAL question is - how does this lead to wrecking the phone?!

>>739287801
Normies are stupid enough to believe it

>>739287801
It would be too long, fucking normies will believe

>>739287060
Best I've heard so far
Do this

>>739286184
A bunch of shitty ideas and no action?

>>739282093
this guy drops an iphone in liquid nitrogen, and then boils the mother fucker and it stills works
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVgS0z6Yu6k

>>739287801
People microwaved their phones.

try harder /b/
We can do this better
>good old times?

>>739286190
Apple likes their own cables and adapters too much to not make their own fork.

>>739287908
Dude the glass literally cracks at the end. Plus you'd have to freeze it for up to 4 hours, and then boil it. Extremely high temperature, combined with extremely low temperature causes things to crack and expand.

>>739286710
this

Alright so there's this type of screen protector that is liquid based that you smear on your phone that claims to soak into the pores and harden to make your screen stronger. There may be a way to hijack that by claiming that mixing ammonia and bleach then applying to your phone will give the same effect. Though stress that you have to mix beforehand so they're more likely to gas themselves.

Put iPhone in toaster
Put toaster in tub
???????????
Profit

>>739287976
This is really good:>>739287880
1. Claims to be good for your phone
2. Has scientific BS behind it
3. Normies can't disprove it quickly

>>739288050
But you have to boil it in a plastic bag. Even the most stupid normies get that dropping your phone into water isnt a great idea

>>739288050
yes it does.
AFTER he puts it in liquid nitrogen and then boils it 5 fucking times.
shutup you fucking faggot nobody asked you

>>739288174
Plastic bag would still work, heat transfers quickly, plus the inside of the bag would condense and HOLY SHIT IT WOULD CAUSE INTERNAL WATER DAMAGE!! I LOVE IT!

http://www.strawpoll.me/13468431

vote

>>739286710
>>739288125
this because its doubtful normies will know their chemistry

>>739288235
When you freeze the phone, the internal parts freeze with it, boiling it in a bag would cause condensation which would literally cause the phone to condense on the inside. Even a waterproof phone would be damaged.

the new and improved gorilla glass -
hammerproof!

Say that if they rub magnets on the screen then it'll make the zoom better

Come on guys, apple iCE is the best

iWeight
-car wheel pressure
-body fat calculator

Introducing the new Iphone Chem-charge
all you have to do is put bleach and ammonia together and put the base of your plug into it

>>739288305
You could say that "If the phone does not turn on after 20 minutes or if the battery does not change color from green to blue, alongside a specific indicator marking the status of the battery, please place the phone inside a thin plastic bag, and then gently place it in a container of boiling water. The water will safely defrost the phone without causing internal or external water damage."

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>>739288244
guess its freezing your phone and boil it to increase battery capacity

>>739288463
the released ions will charge your battery at lightning fast speeds

>>739283779
>glass phone
how about we tell these faggots that they can super charge there nigger phone by charging a motherfucking spark plug and tap over the that gay ass battery.

>>739288407
agreed

>>739288476
Fucking yes

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>>739288526

But guys, boiling a phone even in a plastic bag is still a risky idea. Freezing it? People will DEFINITELY fall for it, and it will permanently damage the battery, however it will not destroy it.

Boiling after freezing, in a bag, will damage it beyond just the battery, but it is risky.

>>739288501
EXCEPT FREEZING THE PHONE DOESN'T ACTUALLY BREAK IT
LETS ALL COMMIT TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK HAHAH IT'LL BE SO MUCH FUN

>>739288613
We have to decide, do we just freeze it, or do we add the failsafe "boil in a bag if the battery does not change status or if the phone does not turn on after 20 min". It's a high risk, high reward option (the second one that is)

>>739288613
Lets make freezing it official and boiling it afterwards an unofficial lifehack

>>739288524
>>739288463
this
imagine if we got some normies to kill themselves

>>739288730
We could, yeah.

>>739288689
Freezeing it for a long period of time can fuck the battery up

>>739288830
Prove it. show me proof. Prove it bitch. because other anons have already said otherwise.

For example
>>739287461

>>739288764
I'm all for it, the only issue is it'd be hard to play off as an apple feature. We might be best off to mimic some cancerous Facebook videos like buzzfeed or some shit and make a faggoty ass instruction video in the same format.

>>739288764
Could be kinda funny

went snowboarding.
iphone 6 on outer sleeve pocket,
not within insulation of jacket.
temperature round -15c permanent.
phone exposed to that around 6h.
no damage.

>>739289068
this. FREEZING THE PHONE WON;T WORK FAGGOTS

>>739288899
Prove it? You want him to freeze his phone, causing damage to his battery? You do realize that freezing your phone for extensive periods of time and then rapidly defrosting it, causes condensation and water buildup, and the circuitry isn't protected against water damage, only the external shell of the phone.

https://youtu.be/Bj1Ljyiz3fQ

Here's a plan. Turn the phone off, put it in the freezer for 3 hours. If it doesn't show the iCE logo on the screen, the process was unsuccessful. Please reverse all effects by carefully boiling the phone in heated water.

How about we claim there's some new update for the iPhone that lets it do some cool thing and trick everybody into downloading CP

Maybe say something like because of the new waterproof edition, and the heat released from the iPhone, it's now possible to cook an egg on the iPhone. Make them crack eggs on their phones for the lulz

Let's say that the rapid change in temp cause the particles to duplicate

YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

>>739289068
The thing is, I dont think people are that fucking dumb to put it in boiling water but they fucking drilled holes in em so why not

>>739287060
This one

It has to sound official

>>739289162
That's exactly what I proposed. Boil the phone in a bag right after freezing, if it does not turn on after 20 minutes or does not change display to iCE (which indicates a successful battery conversion).

Yeah that sounds good

>>739289112
>>739289112
no find a video you dumb cuck faggot bitch nigger twink
i posted a video in the thread where a guy freezes his phone with liquid nitrogen and boils it 5 fucking times and it still works.
quit being a fucking retard
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVgS0z6Yu6k

>>739289226
Fuck apple ice
Didn't find proof
We've been jewed
>Id say do this
>>739288526

>>739289179
>>739289178
>>739289172
I've fucking got it. We need to tell them that putting your water proof Iphone into a mixture of something like drain cleaner, lye or ammonia will clean the phone and charging port, making it charge and faster. It might even cause broken chargers to work again if you submerge your Iphone in drain cleaner.

hahahahaha

>>739289304
No we have to get people to submerge their phone into drain cleaner or lye for an hour to clean the charging port and camera.

>>739289233
the thing is you are replying to a post that said nothing about boiling them in water

Yeah say that the acidic acids help bost the positive ions while reducing the negative ions

>>739289383
>drain cleaner, lye or ammonia will clean the phone and charging port

not bad

>>739289364
End of summer isn't that far off. You must not understand that placing a phone in >nitrogen< for 5 seconds does not cause the phone to freeze. There's a difference between dry freezing, and freezing in your freezer FOR HOURS. THEN DEFROSTING IN A FUCKING BAG THAT'S INSIDE A VAT OF BOILING WATER.

Can you get that through your thick ruski skull?

>>739289383
Not believable enough

>>739289500
man sure hit me with some hot proof there,
oh wait

How about making people stick their phones in the toaster. "Make your phone more durable, with iToast".

>>739282093
Come on guys, 50 poster and not a single viable idea, think, THINK

File: kekiu.jpg (176KB, 800x1424px)

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It is shit,I know but it is nice concept.iSoil-charge your phone via soil.Also can someone photoshob this so it looks like an actual add?

Apple iCE is the only way this is even going to get considered by hipster cucks. Lye, ammonia, drain cleaner, none of it is going to work because you have zero science behind it. They're all corrosive and even the most retarded hippie on the planet knows that.

>>739289476
I was replying to a post that was proving that freezing wont be enough.
Fuck right off, faggot.

>>739289568
unbelievable af

>>739287060
What about apple adding a new thermo kinetic charge function that if you rub your phone till its warm and shake it it'll charge it a little bit and if you put it in the dryer for a full cycle it'll charge it completely.

>>739289602
This

File: 1444926291810.jpg (9KB, 250x200px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 250x200px

>>739285159
>being this new

>>739289602
I agree, it's our best shot

>>739289383
this is good, but it may be even better if we do something like, "to charge your phone faster, mix water and *add something that will damage the ports*, turn off your phone and place in water for 15 minutes, turn the phone on, tap it dry and charge it much faster"

>>739289602
agreed but have we confirmed freezing the phone breaks it?

>>739289602
I guess
With apple ice tho
Instead of freezing it in putting it in boiled water (gives it away)
You put it in a toster or oven

>>739289602
even if it doesnt destroy your phone it would still be hilarious watching morons putting their phone in the freezer

Say that putting your phone in the washing machine cleans the battery and speakers allowing better quality sound and life

>>739289582
It isn't a bad idea

>>739289734
https://youtu.be/_EYlasmhFW8
It wont do shit.
Also check this channel for inspiration

>>739289734
I can confirm that if people don't see the iCE logo, they will panic and boil the phone. As a techfag - yes. It breaks it.

File: 1300044776986.jpg (34KB, 600x600px)

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>>739282093

>>739289734
Freezing a battery for extensive periods of time, damages it. There's a chance of damaging other components as well during the defrosting process.

IF you want to really damage it, you have to boil it right after, it would cause the inside of the phone to condense. Heat and cold do not mix very well. Even a retard knows it. It's a risky idea, but the only idea that has science behind it, and isn't as obvious as "lye, acid, microwave, nuclear blast"

>>739289855
Put it in a roster or oven
That has to break it then

you guys are fucking stupid and just try hard
>hit up techfag
>develope a kingo root for iphones
>call it iLiberty or whatever
>"Much more just one click away" or something
>this is where jailbreak comes in
>iLiberty jailbreaks phone and shits all over phone security
>delete every system file in background after rooting, but under the guise of "cleaning up" or whatever
>shut off phone after pressing finish
>normies realize phone is bricked
you can thank me when the tweets start flooding

>>739289899
>>739289855
*toster
Put in the roster after you freeze it

>>739289500
ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy your fucking retarded here is proof XDXDXDXDXDXD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kOM2YERm3Jw

this mother fucker actually froze it inside an ice block and dropped it off a building and it still works bitch.

TLDR?
suck my fucking cock

I don’t know how many households in the US have a induction stove, but I’m pretty sure that the stove would kill an iPhone pretty fast.

And the magnetic field wouldn’t be too hard to beliefe, if you’re retarded.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Induction_cooking

What do you think?

>>739284422
Mate, let's be real.

iPhone users line up outside of stores to pay $700 for the same phone but shinier. Wave and the Headphone port hoax have both worked before, what makes you think another round of this won't?

Apple has designed a phone strong enough so that you can wash the ports out with household chemicals.

>>739289929
This.

>>739290069
but it wouldnt break the phone would it?

File: DEXATI20170718000115.png (434KB, 1079x1088px) Image search: [Google]

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>>739290165

>>739289929
How impressive and also illegal

>>739290015
>>739289894
You must be retarded and not know how to read. Let me tell this it you, in a way a first grader would understand.

Phone in cold, your battery gets damaged permanently, permanently means a degrade in quality and overall battery life. Degrade means to decrease by the way.

When you put cold things in hot water, those cold things expand, crack and condense. Which is a big no no for technology.

File: DEXATI20170718000258.png (181KB, 1079x520px)

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>>739290198
#iPride

>>739290235
This could work.

Ipride is great

>>739290235
iPRIDE IS GENIUS

HIPSTER CUCKS TOASTING IPHONES EVERYWHERE

i bet someone here on 4chan can make an app that literally delet everything from the iphone, including the software

FUCK YES, iPRIDE IT IS

>>739290226
then why does his phone still work?
faggot

ATTENTION PLEASE:

ATTENTION PLEASE:
I HAVE A MORE BELIEVABLE VERSION OF APPLE ICE

NOTE: THIS NOT ALL MY IDEA

1. Put IPhone in freezer to extend battery life (gives ions a hard reset)
2. Ice Logo should appear once the ions are reset
3. If Ice logo doesn't appear, put it in a really hot heat source (oven, Toster, etc,)
4. Repeat process

>>739290235
>>739290198
>>739290165
I fucking like this

>>739290235
if we put pride on fucking anything it will work, I guarenfuckingtee it.

Also you could release both iPride and iCE in a single update. It would give apple cucks an appeal to both aesthetics, and functionality.

You could even combine iCE and iPride, freeze and toast.

>>739286172
Yeah, they can help with the hardware destruction part

>>739290235
iPRIDE GOOOOOO

>>739290416
Because you're retarded and failed to comprehend anything I said, go back to school you cuck.

>>739290466
Nono, lets just stick with ipride

>>739290235
yes. yes.
this is so good.
so good.

We can definetly get #iPride trending, using those images

>>739290466
YES, LET'S COMBINE IPRIDE WITH APPLE ICE

>>739290459
DO NOT put iPhone in boiling pot of water (even if it's in a bag)
even a retard would know that's BS

>>739290198
LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO

>>739290466
what about
>>739289929

>>739289226
This. I saw a video where they took iPhone 7 and left it in coke and then froze it to test the water proof and it still worked after getting it out of the frozen coke.

So pride it is??0

File: IMG_0063.jpg (107KB, 500x275px)

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Let's just make a compilation really quick of trendy futuristic marketing buzzwords.

>Air
>Wave
>Flex
>Revolution
>Innovation
>Hands-Free
>Pro
>Deluxe
>Intuitive
>Micro
>Guaranteed
>Performance
>Rethink
>Optimize

That's all I got so far, maybe this'll generate ideas or something.

iPRIDE HYPE THREAD

>>739290466
This

>>739290563
but apple ice doesn't work

>>739290590
Yes

YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.
YOUR DAILY REMINDER THAT FREEZING AN IPHONE WON'T BREAK THE IPHONE. it ACTUALLY WON'T DO SHIT. YOU ARE COMMITTING TO AN IDEA THAT WON'T WORK.
DROP THE IDEA AND MOVE ON WE CAN DO BETTER THAN SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T FUCKING BREAK A PHONE AT ALL.

When should we spread it

>>739290466
I think we could get both trading if we tried, my money is on iPride tho

>>739290165
>>739290198
>>739290235
Nobody is going to put their phone into a toaster, they already know what happens to toast when you toast it.

That's like putting your iphone over an open flame.

However putting your phone into lye water may work, but not everyone has lye and I don't really think it would work.

>>739290621
Apple Ice freezes components, Pride defrosts them and causes them to crack, break and condense. Both could work, either one separately might not.

Guys, let's make a new thread before this 404's

MAKE A NEW THREAD OP.
iPRIDE toaster lets fucking go

>>739290235
>>739290165
>>739290198
won't work i think, very few people would put it in the toaster, but we can make people break their phones by nail polish + vinegar on the back panel of it and let it rest on the sun for couple hours, we could tell that the low heat and radiation of the sun along with the vinegar and nail polish, reacts with the metalic ink on the back panel and would change colors

What's it called

>>739290696
see
>>739289929

>>739290696
I agree but at the same time I want to see the kinds of people who end up believing it if any

>>739290734
NEW THREAD
NEW THREAD
NEW THREAD
>>739290734

>>739290707
maybe we could combine but we are adding to much shit and too many steps.
the more shit we add the more suspicious normies will get.

plus freezzing the iphone won;t break it at all so lets just leave it out.

>>739290734
>>739290734
>>739290734
NEW ONE BOYS

>>739290696
This is why Apple ICE works
You freeze the shit out of nigger phone
You put it in toaster
Extreme cold and extreme heat = broken screen

If Ipride doesn't work, what about cleaning the ports/screen with pesticides. Not sure if it will work, but some household pesticides contain bromine gas, liquid bromine fucks IPhones up, would bromine gas work?

>>739290696
Agreed we need a heat source that's a little more subtle

I'm telling you magnets are the way to go

it's getting worse.

the software thing:
works only for jailbroken phones,
which should be around 0.something % of the users

freezing doesnt do shit

every child learned not to put stuff in the toaster

boiling is too close to the last "drop in water" action


just tell them it's super tough,
throw it around, kids proof,
"throw it over to make a pic" is now safe,
blah blah.

"apple now made the iphone lifeproof,
and gives you the freedom to care about the important things in life"
*family happily playing with each other,
kids dropping phone,
everyone laughs, happy shits n giggles.

>>739290970
Maybe heaters?

What about magnets

>>739290235
I PRIDE

>>739291113
What if we get them to apply something like nail polish to the back and put in the oven to cure

>>739289929
I LOVE IT

File: 1457473171600.jpg (40KB, 497x500px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 497x500px

>>739285043
This could work.

How about something to restore cracked screens?

A dumb applefag would do almost anything to restore a dropped iPhone and hipsters that are to dumb to use a case are exactly our target audience

How about something with a Scale?

Like, where you need to turn your phone screen to the ground/floor and step on its back because that's where the sensors are.

When they step on it, the screen will break.

>>739282093
IVE GOT IT
We'll make promotional ads that say by mixing bleach and ammonia and dipping your iphone in it'll make the backplate fully clear so you can see the circuitry (i can only imagine it wouldn't be a clear glass backplate)
Or... New iphone is made of plexiglass so its 100% bulletproof

Puting nail polish remover on your screen allows the cracked glass to mold together then using a lighter heat up the nail polish remover to harden it

>>739291241
Yes, but on the camera maybe

>>739290734
>>739290734
NEW THREAD
>NEW THREAD
NEW THREAD
>>739290734
>>739290734

>>739291400
Spread toothpaste on the phone to help fix cracks, leave the toothpaste on for 15 minutes, then wipe off with a cleansing wipe.

Not really harmful, just makes the cucks look like idiots.