Just share your secrets, this is a safe place.

I killed a sleeping hobo by smashing his skull in with a rock an undisclosed number of years ago near a large city in the United States

>>738385582
How did you feel afterwards

>>738385582
Why

I have a strange fetish watching short girls try to reach objects that taller up

>>738386886
BTW my wife is 5'2". Nothing makes me happier than watching her try to reach for the turkey pan on thanksgiving. She has to whip out a footstool, because I refuse to help her

I did shrooms at 15

>>738386569
>>738386800
Instant fear there was a camera or a witness. I honestly don't have a reason I just did it spontaneously because I felt I could get away with it

I almost drowned my sister because of an argument we had while swimming. Nobody else knows and we're best friends now, but I think about that day a lot.

One day I entered a store that had an "open" sign and turned in on to "closed" after leaving just for the giggles

>>738385419
I hate niggas.

>>738387120
how did it feel?

I've nearly raped my gf numerous times when she wasnt in the mood. We sleep naked and shes not strong enough to hold me back. Never go through with it though because I'm a pussy.

I work as a male nurse in a home where a lot of mentally disabled people are placed. It gives them the feeling of not being alone, to those that actually know what the fuck is going on. These range from forgetting where they are to talking to themselves, to drooling all the time.

Since I'm the only male there I get called on a lot by other nurses to do the heavy lifting. Taking some of them to their beds, helping them on the toilets. Stuff like that. I see them naked all the time.

I always act slightly disgusted when the other nurses are around but I always have a raging boner. I get so hard seeing these retards naked. I like wiping their piss off. I tell the women that I need to spread their cunt lips in order to really get in there. So I spread their lips and stick my bare fingers in there to "check" for more pee. I grab the guy's cocks and pull their foreskins back, very slowly, and with a very tight grip. They almost always get hard.

When I take them to bed I have to lean over them to arrange some of their things. I purposely lean too far in and my boner rubs up against their faces or heads. I stopped wearing boxers so when I get a boner, my precum leaks through my pants and gets smeared all over my patients.

>>738387357
Good as shit, I tripped hard and I was a tweak apparently lmao. it was amazing but the day after I remember having diarrhea and a massive on/off headache that lasted all day

I dropped out of university without telling my parents (they were still paying for the semester I dropped out). I sold weed and partied the rest of the year, they never found out. They think I only dropped out after that semester.

>>738385419
I let my my hamster starve to death when I was 7 years old.

>>738387457
I have technically raped 3 girls, who told me to stop after realizing they couldn't handle my dick.

>>738387628
What do you do now? You're not like in a mental institution or anything are you? Did you go to college and become successful ?

>>738387782
Ive had that happen before but again I pussed out and got handies. Did it feel good to force them like that?

>>738385419
>>738386018

>>738387856
Cumming instead of getting blue balls um yes it felt good

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>>738385419
I am Trump and I'm playing so much golf my balls have dimples.

>>738385419

Despite my flawless good looks and amazing personality, I'm just looking forward to just dying. I'm just so tired. I plan on killing myself on my 30th birthday, that way I'll have gave myself a good few years beforehand in case I change my mind.. I can't see that happening though.

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I'll probably be judged even by the degenerate standards of /b/.

> I stalked the shit out of a hot teacher. Obscene phone calls galore, drove by her house half a dozen times, even trick or treated her on Halloween just to be near her.

> I kicked the shit out of a freshman as a Sr. . . . not a secret. The secret is I think it gave him PTSD and turned him into a steroid user.

> I lost my virginity to a woman 15 years older than I who looked like my mom. I only fucked her because she was older and looked like my mom. I came in her imagining that I was fucking my mom.

> I'm planning a troll job that will ruin a guy's life. At 60 he'll probably get divorced, excommunicated, and disowned by his kids. I don't know if I'll do it, UNLESS he goes shit-lib again and advocates importing more mud people.

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I know that my sister's boyfriend is a queer, but I haven't told anybody else that I know this

When I was around 10 my dad got serious with a woman and moved her and her 5 year old daughter in with us. Her daughter had serious mental/behavioral problems. Was always getting sent home from daycare and later school. My dad and her mom both worked so after school I had to watch her. I spent the next five years dealing with her roller coaster emotions and tantrums. When I turned 15 I really started to resent her. I stopped even trying to watch her and just crushed her Ativan into powder and gave it to her in orange juice. One of the times I did this she passed out on the couch wearing just her panties and a t shirt. I got bold and was horny so I pressed a finger to her little hole. She didn't react at all. Long story short I drugged and raped her almost everyday for the next two years. I lost my virginty to her and had my first anal with her. I pumped my cum in her holes and then soaked her in a bath to get rid of it. After I was done hate fucking her at first I kinda got attached to her. Her destructive behavior didn't really bother me anymore. Sadly my dad and her mom broke up and she was gone from my life forever. I still miss her a lot even 15 years later.

>>738387982
how do you know?

>>738387930
You think i should go through with it? Shes mad at me tonight so i know im not getting jack shit.

I don't brush my teeth and at night my gf tickles the inner portion of my anus until I fall asleep....alot of other things but these are what I consider real secrets

I tried sounding with those metal magnets and they got stuck. Then I a needed a surgery...

>>738388086
She will probably love you showing dominance

Me and my younger cousin touched each other all of the time i still jerk off thinking about it, wish she would do it again haha

>>738388247
I'm going to give it a try. Ill make a post with an update later tonight. Possibly with pics

>>738385419
>>738387348

>>738387190
Did you see it in the news or in the papers after awhile? Were you nervous?

one time when I finished the girl asked me if I got any cum in her hair and I said no but I lied

>>738385419
I am a famous YouTuber.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UhDwkxqR1A

>>738388065
Before he started dating my sister, I would see him around school (sister doesn't go to same school by the way). And he would be sitting on other guys' laps and *jokingly* kiss other guys on the mouth. Plus, he acts totally gay anyways. I'm surprised it's not more well known about by anybody else

I've lied about my mental health for close to 11 years now. Pretty sure I'm neurotypical but my parents kept taking me to therapists around fifth grade because I wasn't doing my homework so I just decided to start making shit up to satisfy the situation. Now I'm not sure if I actually have something or if I've been lying about it for so long that I don't know how to be normal

18176379154

This guy Sam is bullying my little brother at summer school

Any help would be appreciated

>>738388151
you not brushing your teeth probably isn't a secret to some people

>>738388736
NYPA

>>738385419
I wanna know what it's like to be held.

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I thought Amish kids played sega when I was like 4-6 years old

>>738388766
totally true, although the last few years i've grown the full beard extension' and smile from very specific angles and ways

>>738388933
when I was really young I hated brushing my teeth, so I learned how to do that, I was probably like 11 though so no beard

I failed a grade a pretend I'm the same age as all the kids

I'm a fairly popular pop star, and i browse /b/ daily.

I sucked my teachers cock during school hours, he took my virginity in the most kind loving manner. I was also home schooled

>>738388874
>claiming to be someone youre not in an anonymous board
here's your (you)
nice roleplaying, faggot.

>>738388933
>>738389084
how old are you now, you autistic, gross faggot?

Wheres the dude who makes his cousin walk around naked?

>>738389245
can we know who you are? hint

>>738389245
>claiming to be someone youre not in an anonymous board
here's your (you)
nice roleplaying, faggot.

>>738389288
32

>>738389246
tits or gtfo

>>738389405
might not be a femanon
they were probably joking too

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>>738389391

I once took 2 creampies in a row from a tranny

>>738385419
I yearn for societal collapse so I can rape and pillage the country side with ease.

I broke up with my girl cause she lied to me... but I lied first but she will never know that. Neither my friend, cause the girl I lied with was his girl.

I'm a way better writer when drunk. I haven't produced any material I'm happy with since I was made to sober up.

>>738389513
who doesn't?
>>738389527
can't you have a bit of alcohol every now and then?

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>>738389527
Even drunk you suck at writing, you're probably worse than the fat old cuck that writes game of thrones.

my moms friend tried to fonger me in the back of my moms car

>>738389527
Shed anon?

>>738385419
I shot a man in Reno/just to watch him die.

>>738389734
fonger
donger

I have molested over a dozen girls. I have never been caught or even suspected, but worry that one day a girl might tell.

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>>738389734
>my moms friend tried to fonger me in the back of my moms car
>fonger

>>738389674
Nope. I'm taking refusal. If I were to come into contact with any amount of alcohol, I would be sent to the hospital.

>>738389752
What?

>>738389804
how did you feel?

>>738389898
with my hands? fucking retards

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>>738387974
>> I'm planning a troll job that will ruin a guy's life. At 60 he'll probably get divorced, excommunicated, and disowned by his kids. I don't know if I'll do it, UNLESS he goes shit-lib again and advocates importing more mud people.

Nº6 on US top viral spotify chart

>>738389854
tips

what were the ages?

>>738387818
Right now I'm going into senior year in high school (I'm 18 don't yell "MODS") but I don't do drugs on the daily, I do them but I don't want drugs to be my identity. I would never want to be the guy known as a druggy. I've also never been caught doing drugs and I actually took 2 AP classes last year so I would say I'm in good standing.

>>738387282
You fucking monster

>>738389884
Figured you were a popular incest writer named shed anon. He always posts when drunk, figured you were him.

>>738387010
Kek! Mine too anon

I'm with an underage girl, I like that she's underage. The risk turns me on, it helps that the cute little slut has a daddy kink too.

Today she wanted to pretend like I was raping her, she gave up struggling about halfway.

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>>738385419
I love boipussy.

I hate my current GF, but I cant bring myself to tell her.

>>738387545
Anon what in the fuck is wrong with u...

>>738390212
give me her number ill do it for you.

>>738389950

If his fundy wife and kids find out about his interwebz activity they'll disown his ass.

His church will excommunicate him.

@ 60 he's a bit too old to start over. He really should've hid his identity better before starting shit.

>>738389967
the youngest girl was 8. I got some great blowjobs from her, but no sex. The youngest that I sexxed was 10.

>>738390145
that's hot

>>738386886
How did that develop exactly? Lol

the last time a friend (girl, now 18, me too) i saw her trying to grab something that was high in a closet, so i reached it for her and as she got it i slapped her ass so hard she moaned, and literally turned around and started kissing me and teasing my johnson, we ended up fucking hardcore in her bedroom with her parents in the one beside it.

>>738389245
My last name is a synonym for quick, or fast.

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>>738387940
I feel ya man. 31 here. The ride never ends..

>>738390243
how the fuck did you do it without being caught though? sharing might not be the best idea though

This girl I was attempting to fucj had insomnia so she would randomly pass out, we were drinking & I was horny so I took advantage of a good/bad situation and played with her pussy and used her hand to jerk myself and came on her tits.

>>738389245
>>738390392
this meme needs to die you autistic retards. It's stale and old.

>>738390358
Taylor Swift, nice b8 fag

>>738390392
this

31 also. probably should have ended it at 30.

i beat my meat

>>738389245
>be successful
>browse /b/ daily

Pick one

>>738388499
Famous.

69 veiws

>>738387818
Kek

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I once attempted to eat a popsicle lewdly.

>>738390230
I like retards. What can I say?

>>738390448
Move to a white trash trailer park, and always have weed to smoke. The losers will gravitate to you, and the next thing you know, you are cuddling with their kids.

>>738388812
;( sorry anon

When I was 19, I did a guy in Laos from a thousand yards out. It was a rifle shot in high wind. Maybe eight or even ten guys in the world could have made that shot. It's the only thing I was ever good at

>>738390589
im only 20 and im fucking done. send help.

>>738390870
see:
>>738390208

I stepped on an ant in the street and I regret it badly, I wish I had a time machine so I can go back in time and stop myself from doing so...

>>738389245
Prove it :)

>>738390358
>>738390587
dude no he's talking about david hurry the baseball commentator

>>738390212
is she hot at least, faggot?

when i was 22 i stole about 200 dollars from my father and took it to a strip club.

>>738390929
what

>>738390765
I'm halfway there I guess
I already have weed on me almost always but I have toutettes and it helps stop my ticks
I live in a decent neighborhood though, also, why wouldn't the kids tell? To basically embedded in their brains at this point

>>738389698
Savage much? Damn anon

>>738390963
He said pop star dipshit.

>>738391012
become a trap/cd/ or sissy and you will be happy again. I guarantee it. :)

>>738391002
my cousin sucked me off and i felt her up when we were 16. this was my first sexual experience.

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>>738385419
I think Judaism is a beautiful religion.

>>738389884
Does that help? I feel like shit and cold shaking all night by the looks of things.

>>738391072
why is that bad? shit sounds so cash.

>>738391072
i like to get drunk and put on womens undies and fap to animu and asian chicks.

i put a banana.... down there when i was 17

>>738391064
But I don't have the body for that. maybe if I had a skinny body type.

>>738391130
you're the worst person here

>>738390765
>white trash trailer park

Had some of my craziest sex adventures happened places like this.

when I was 10 I almost fucked my 4 year old niece

>>738391145
its bad cause im mormon. and im still trying to be mormon. but im a sex addict.
my wife sent me a selfie of her and her bff in their new bikinis and i wanked to her bff instead of her.

i watched the female tard take a bath the first naked woman i saw (other then mom a few times)

>>738391134
Help? It forces you not to drink because if you do, you're fucked. You'll feel like wanting to die because everything hurts.

So if that's what you need, then yeah, it helps.

I only take it to gain my wife's trust again. I don't think I need it.

>>738391134
Best cure for alcoholism is gamma hyrdoxybutyric acid faggot. Look it up.

>>738391259
im on a government scholarship and was required to go to a job fair in DC to get an internship. trip and hotel and food all paid for. i spent the trip drunk in my hotel room soliciting sex on craigslist.

>>738391201
I mean it. Not religious, but if I were to do so I'd probably go Jewish.

>>738390513
No, it's a classic newfag.

i enjoy nick cage movies

>>738389961
u st vincent

>>738391409
>it's a classic newfag
Are you saying that it's a classic newfag meme? I agree you fucking retarded autistic 12 year old. An hero.

>>738391364
ive stolen hundred of dollars of video games from walmart and gamestop and never been caught. i stole gasoline from my first employer at 19. i stole numerous street signs, once so a girl would make out with me.

If I don't have a stinging pain somewhere on my body after sex, I'm not really satisfied.

>>738387982
why do some gay guys date women anyway

it doesn't make sense

>>738385582
I think I know you

>>738390589
Ya, i got thrown in jail after an ambulance ride. My exhaust is corkscrew uo beside the back passenger door. Wife is so pissed she was gone all day after ripping my as 45 times.

Now the only fun thing in my life (drinking) is off the table.

...its really been a battle for 20 years and 2 months ago i was headed home to eat a shotgun and got an appointment at the shrink instead.

Honestly wish id hust have a stroke and die...

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>>738391259
Mormonism is a retarded religion. Also if you care so much about the morals of your religion why are you on /b/? this place is 10x worse for your soul than wanking it to a slut in a bikini.

>>738385419
Am fairly decent looking guy and at times want a family. However I'm also a loli and basically am forbidding myself from having a family because I know I'd molest my daughter if I had one.

I also got so far out into a rape fetish that anytime a headline would come up about it I'd start getting hard and searching the article for a pic of the girl.

>>738388023
Can't you find her?
Ask your dad that you want to meet them for good old times and rape all e of them.

>>738391727
3*

>>738391672
why not just accept fate and rape daughter

>>738391628
because im a terrible person, obviously.
im a sinner and i need jesus. but being a sinner is ok, that's the whole point of religion, to try and be a better person.
>once you're here you never leave

>>738391617
if you plan on killing yourself anyway, you might as well try living without your wife to see what it's like. who knows, you may change your mind

>>738391672
don't worry, you're not alone

>>738391672
I'm glad you've stopped yourself from having children. It's one thing to be a pedo, but molesting your own children is way worse. fuck you faggot for even thinking that. an hero.

I've made a female cousin sit on my lap, which escalated to me rubbing her pussy, which escalated to me grinding her on my clothes shaft, which escalated to a heated moment of whipping it out, sliding her panties, squirming held still, shoving of my dick in her oh-my-god tight pussy, she popped, little blood, and maybe 10 seconds of grinding before I emptied a month's load of cum inside her, the cum slid down my dick, balls, thighs, her thighs, an utter mess of pink blood, pussy juice and cum, which I wiped with clenex, put her panties back where they were and walked her to the bathroom where I "washed her" with water.

She became my fuck toy ever since, and let me tell you, she loved/s every single time. Including the first time which albeit was one of the hottest times, in terms of orgasm strength alongside with the first time I filled her asshole with cum.

This, is a true memory and no shitposting.

This slutty girl hit me up one night drunk, so i went to pick her up from the bar she was at. We drank a couple of beers and then she laid on my bed. We started making out and then she started crying and passed out. I stripped down naked because i figured she would wake up and we would fuck, and i considered briefly fucking her while she was passed out but different. Eventually i fell asleep too. We woke up i took her to get coffee and brought her home. Weeks later i found out she told people we had sex. Im guessing she was too drunk to remember and just assumed.

I couldnt even get laid from the sluttiest girl i knew. Yet somehow everyone thinks i didn.

>>738391797
Part of me still loves her tho. I've spent so much time with her and have had sex with her countless times. I'm terrified that if I leave her I won't find someone else too.
I'll miss that tight pussy and those sagging tits.

>>738391672
>I also got so far out into a rape fetish that anytime a headline would come up about it I'd start getting hard and searching the article for a pic of the girl.

you're not alone. have masturbated to newspapers before.

>>738391843
How old were you/ how old are you now? still fuck around?

>>738391909
if you do kill your self make sure anyone you love knows it's not their fault, you don't want to scar them

I got high with my step brother and, without him knowing I was gay, I took advantage of him. I pretended like I was as high as him, but I knew what I had to do to get him undressed. Well, to make a long story short he thinks me giving him a 15 min blowjob was just a fever dream.

>>738391433

TBH, Nick has done movies that don't suck. Wild at Heart comes to mind first. Then again, I wouldn't have watched it had David Lynch not been the director.

>>738391672
This. Loli isn't my thing but I love writing rape fantasies and acting them out online with others. Also, I'm friends with a few rape survivors and it really turns me on to no end knowing that that's why they're the way that they are. I'd like to teach middle/high school but it'd be a disaster waiting to happen

My step sister abused me pretty much my whole life. She's 4 years older than me and from the the time I was 6 till I was 12 she made me lick her pussy and finger her when our parents were gone. This intensified as she got older and I got left in her care. She also would mercilessly beat my nutsack if I gave her even a little resistance and sometimes for no reason. It changed when I turned 12 and was physically able to get power her. It still took awhile to get to a point that I tree her off me because I was mentally conditioned to expect tremendous ball pain for upsetting her. But one day I decided to struggle and after she gave me a good knee to the balls I instinctively head butted her as I bent forward to guard my nuts. She went down had a bloody nose and stayed down. She wasn't out but she was dazed. After that I slowly realized I was stronger than her and just had to guard my nuts when we fought. We still fought regularly but she never got to abuse me again. However when I was 17 she was still living at home. We were having one of our usual arguments when she made a comment about my lack of balls and grabbed them really hard and pulled. I was already angry and I guess the years of abuse took thier toll because I hit here in the face like she was a man. She crumbled but I wasn't done I say on her chest and alternated between choking her and slapping her face really hard. I moved down ripped her shirt open tearing all it buttons and started punching her boobs because I learned thru fighting her that actually hurts girls some. After awhile of that I punched her in the stomach once and she puked on me. I decided that was enough and I got off her. She was crying and breathing harder but also gasping like she was crying/laughing at the same time. She looked at me and said" guess your starting to actclike a man now. Can the big man please put me in my bed"? I was shocked by her and what I did but I Ickes her up and carried her to her room. We didn't fuck but

>>738392291
was she cute?

>>738392291
post more

>>738392291
damn continue anon

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I fapped when I took part in a nofap post
(3 weeks, fapp on first day.)

>>738392291
That's not where this goes. I'd never consider it anyway as part of me still really hates her. But she never tried to physically abuse me again In any way she kept her shit to verbal only and there was a lot less of it. She actually chilled out a lot and we are trying to mend our relationship but I'm having a hard time letting it go. We told mom and dad a date beat her up and my parents were baffled she didn't want to press charges but she was 21 and they couldn't make her. They have no idea I was the one who gave her a savage beating. No one but me and her know.

>>738392291
the imagination is wild in this one. You got issues bro.

Back when I was a freshman all my friends had already had sex and I was so nervous to because I heard that it hurt your first time so I got online, bought a dildo and took my own virginity/broke my hymen myself.

>>738392666
trips

> be me
> 29
> only had sex once in my whole life
> with a chinese girl
> her pussy smelled so bad I couldn't keep up erection. FAIL
> recently went up to this chick is starbucks and started conversation
> ballsofsteel.jpg
> convo went super well, she's excited, that night we go dancing salsa!
> few days later, date at a bar
> one drink she's already dizzy
> ended up kissing in the car on the way back
> week and half later, third date, go out to park
> put arm around her, feeling cozy as fuck
> chilling at some cafe afterwards
> vibes are awesome
> precuming in my pants during the whole thing
> week passes by, text something sweet to ther
> she suddenly comes up with excuse that she has to focus on her studies.
> CALLS IT QUITS!
> what the fucking shit man, don't girl have any commitment
> felt humiliated as fuck
> wrote long bullshit text
> she's angrily responding
> it's game over

Feeling hopeless and sad. Until I get over her bitch ass and find another girl , but not gonna lie it does hurt.

>>738392528
How old are you all now? Did she apologize for molesting you and shit?

>>738390243
kys

>>738391350
Well good luck to you brother. Im gonna shake and freeze myself to bed soon. Gonna be a real shit monday when i tell my boss i need off for court. Maybe i just wont say shit and take a vacarion day. Hope for the best.

Its funny. I drink to not feel like a piece of shit but then i fall down at the family barbeque, crash my car, get a dui, piss off my wife, and become super peice of shit.

I shoukd found a cliff to drive off of instead of a ditch.

>>738391358
K thx

>>738392729
I'm 27 she's 31 now. She kinda apolgized but not really basically heavily insinuating I wanted to do that stuff to her and that's part of the reason I'm having a hard time building a new relationship with her.

>>738391506
No u dense fuck and im not arguing with a stranger on the internet so go neck yourself

i want a fur suit

i pirate movies online

>>738348676
I never get trips when I actually want them. What a waste

>>738392916
Man fuck that, you were too young to know what you were doing. tell her that. tell her she really fucked you up or something, make her feel guilty. Why is she even trying to rebuild the relationship if she wont even take responsibility?

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>>738392961
>being this assblasted.
KEK. please an hero you waste of skin. You are a failure, no one likes you.

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>>738387545

>>738392291

Kinda surprised you didn't revenge rape her.

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I am straight, but lately I would like to suck a penis and make it cum.

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>>738387974
>I'll probably be judged even by the degenerate standards of /b/.

yeah, you're just an asshole.

>>738393058
I'm not sure either she says it for our parents. That they hate how much weight and need to try to be better for them but I'm not sure. We got into a heated argument about that already and it ended with her saying boys always like playing with girls parts even at at young age, she'll go on with blah blah study from blah blah source and we end up just yelling at eachother.

This girl I was attempting to fuck had insomnia so she would randomly pass out, every single time we hung out, so I'd do little things each time to secure hoe long she'd really be sleep, always move her, kiss her, open her mouth, so one day I went for it, noting to leave evidence but enough to get me off, we were drinking (which helped way more) & I was horny so I took advantage of a good/bad situation and played with her pussy and used her hand to jerk myself and came on her tits. Cutest little blonde girl never found out.

I'm 22, no money issues but because I'm lazy I work as an escort, my boyfriend doesn't know, my best friend does it too and we enjoy comparing our clients and how much we make, we mainly use the money to buy weed or gifts for each other.

>>738393329
you're bi, not straight.

>>738393201
I'd never put my genitals anywhere near her. History says she'll try to damage them.

>>738392839
>>738392839
I used to feel like that as well.

I used to drink because I felt like shit and in the end that just made me feel even shittier.

If you do ever completely stop, things'll get easier. You just really want to stop and not just say it. As cliche as that may sound.

>>738385419
almost literally a coin toss from an hero tomorrow when my foreclosure eviction happens.
>wife is in 2 week behavioral health lockdown from dual axis bi-polar and alcoholism detox - using booze to self-medicate for pain
>no income due to disability from car wreck injuries when t-boned by old dude with alzheimers with no money/insurance and died in the crash
>savings used up on medical bills
>all family is dead
>friends far away and have own troubles
>have $1300/month income, with $1700/month mortgage - discounting every and all bills
>$40 to my name until next Saturday, electric will probably be cut on Wed. which means no internet, hot water, refrigerator etc.
>have to put off my monthly Rx - meaning withdrawals from head meds, pain meds, GI meds.

Not blaming anyone, too tired to even be mad anymore. Last week had to choose between buying pet food or people food... kibbles come first, then ramen for me.

So, cord around neck or one in the chest. Maybe even neither.

>>738392065
This. no shit. Lost 2 friends to suicide right after hanging out with them.

Hence the fucking year long bender and hating myself

My girlfriend dared me to put a cough drop in my butt while watching Borat and I lost the cough drop until I dug it out of my shithole

chloroformed myself at work because i hate my fucking job. Didn't work out too well just a heap of tests and not being able to drive for a month. Stupid idea

currently fucking up my life because I want to have the worst score possible at an online purity test, I try to do the biggest amount of drugs and trashy sex things and just evil things in general

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>>738393329
Then you're not str8 faggot. And neither am I.

I just got invited to the wedding of a girl I fucked while she was dating and engaged to this same guy.

>>738393489
>This girl I was attempting to fuck had insomnia so she would randomly pass out, every single time we hung out

That's narcolepsy or something similar, not insomnia. Insomnia is literally the opposite.

>>738393793
What test

>>738393518
>History says she'll try to damage them.

Yeah, there is that.

>>738393491
Where do you live? Can I hire you?

>>738392065

This. But it's okay to blame it on someone else.

>>738393949
nsw australia

>>738393916
It's in French, called the Griffor test, but I'm sure you can find an English equivalent

>>738393916
So no one knows i did it, they thought i randomly passed out. Got an MRI, EEG, couple other things

>>738394035

Can you outcall to FL?

>>738393751
What exactly were you trying to accomplish? Legit question...I dont see what you were going for.

>>738393078
Says the neckbeard faggot...

>>738393425
Well I hope it gets resolved one way or another. Who knows, maybe she still lowkey wants to fuck you or something.

I have a girlfriend and we live together, but I don't love her anymore. I'm not even attracted to her. She thinks everything is fine and she loves me.

Meanwhile, I have fallen completely in love with a coworker. She's beautiful, sweet, and funny, and she has experienced a lot of the same kind of fucked up shit I have without letting it drag her down. She and I chat at work and talk at length on PS4, which we play together online regularly. She's clearly attracted to and interested in me too, but she is happily married and has been since long before we met. I don't expect that to change and I don't dare try to pull her away from her husband.

I think about her all the time now. Talking with her is the highlight of my day, but knowing she'll never be mine is crushing me. I get really depressed lately, and it doesn't help that I make way less money than I need to leave my current girlfriend and get a place to myself.

This other girl is everything I've ever wanted. She's like a drug. I'm happy when I'm near her or we're playing a game together, but the prospect of abandoning my friendship with her for the sake of my own situation feels like it might kill me.

>>738394217
haven't you got a few slags you can shag in florida?

>>738393916
>>738394093

google internet purity test

The classic one is 500 questions. The purity test concept goes back to the early '90s, maybe earlier. You'd have to check a USENET archive to find out.

>>738393536
Right. Well, one of my best friends in the world found me and called the law. So i must have been in bad shape. I quit yesterday for good. Gonna be a long fucking road

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>>738394278
KEK. You're still going on about this? Why are you so mad? Just an hero please! you lost this argument.

>>738393538
Fuck that sucks anon.

>>738385419
I killed me a woman in Tennessee, I just broke jail and they're gunning for me.

Im on the run, living on the run.

Doctors are concerned that I have cancer in my bowels. I'm getting a colonoscopy in two weeks, I'm scared as fuck because I just stopped being depressed for the first time in years. I'm only 20 man.

>>738394265
In a position where i just wanted some time off work but i knew if i asked i'd be putting all my co workers in shit, they kind of need me even though they dont want me. Plus i was curious and numb from a breakup.

>>738394385

Sounds like oneitis to me.

>>738393862
not sure you may be right, she would stay up all nights never sleep so she always randomly crashed, her & her mother said she had insomnia

>>738394594
what kind of symptoms are you having?

>>738394531
You neckbeard gets longer with every post.

>look at me projecting.

Go be a degenerate elsewhere

>>738394409

Plenty of slags in FL. None of them AUS.
I'm working my way through the UN.

>>738385419
I'm trans and consider suicide daily because no matter how much I want to, I'll never be able to fully transition.

>>738394474
It was actually easy for me at first. It's the keeping it up when unsupervised that will be a problem.

Before you know it, the shakes and sweats will be gone and you'll finally get some real sleep. You'll realize just how shitty you've been sleeping and at first you'll always be tired but then slowly all your energy comes back.

It's a pretty good feeling. And like I said, time flies but being sober is forever.

>>738393538
You seem like a good person

>kibbles come first
Dont an hero anon, your pets need you.

>>738394035
alright I'm interested. whats your rate?

>>738393538
Then who will take care of your animal friends?

20 yrs old and wish I could have cheese pizza files if laws weren't so strict

>>738385419
I turned someone in for having cp and beast on their computer.

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>>738394873
max kek. You are so mad. You don't even know what neckbeard means either! KEK. if anything it's you for pretending to be taylor swift.

>>738394884
Whoa whoa whoa, set achievable goals. Knock out NATO first.

>>738394831
Painful bowel movements that smell like a dead animal with dark black sticky tar like bits smeared in there, my digestion is super weird and screwy.

>>738394674
Makes sense now. Hope shit works out for you anon.

>>738393329
I'd let you suck my dick if you let me fuck you in the ass. Also nice cock, I'd love to shove it deep in my throat. Later on maybe my ass. Just looking at your cock makes me so fucking horny.

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>>738390693
Cute wolf, anon.

>>738395094

I have half of NATO already as well as a lot of East Asia. It's a long term projects.

>>738395072
You did a good thing

<i>testing italics lmao</i>

>>738395194

Yeah. That kind of does sound like cancer. Sorry anon.

[i]how do i not know how to do this[/i]

>>738395393
>>738395478
kek

>>738387982
maybe your sister has a cock

>>738395410
I lost a lot of friends recently and im scared of feeling alone if things end up being really bad.

>>738395194
you've got an upper gi bleed, with rotting pieces of your flesh up there.

no joke. you need to see a dr tomorrow, or go to the er tonight if you can afford it.

>>738395852
no I've got cancew

>>738395708

I'm going in for a colonoscopy/endoscopy later this month. My first for both. I'm more paranoid than scared. Not looking forward to the Prep before hand.

>>738390145
jordan u sick bastard

>>738394898
kys

>>738395699
dubs dont lie

>>738387940
The way you worded this sounds like someone I know and it instantly gave me feels

im closet bi, i really want to give oral to a guy or two on a continuous basis. id like to let them fuck me and serve them sexually often.
i want to fuck the cute girls i see but they are of objectionable ages.
i like when my fiance calls me daddy and i ask her if she did her homework because of the last point.

>>738387545
That was...well umm. I-i-i...hmmm

>>738391578
Where is your favorite spot?

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>>738394585
thanks
>>738394924
they will adjust and be better off with someone who is physically able to give them the running they need
>>738395022
they will find a new home, and thrive. they're all rescues in the first place, and both of our conditions are not doing them any favors as it stands. We can't run them as we used to be able to (5k trail runs 3 times/week plus 5 acres of invisible fenced in property in a rural part of the state)

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I'm 19 and still sleep with my baby blanket, I ejaculate on it at night if I killed something that day, usually squirrels, coyotes, and rabbits.

I love the fucking smell of it, I only wash it in the winter when I have to keep my windows closed so my family won't smell it. When I do wash, I do it in my parents white sink so I can see how filthy the water gets, usually the same color as the 2 liter cum bottles that guy posts around Christmas.

I'm moving out to college soon and really want to take it, both for sexual satisfaction and because of how soft it feels (after I clean it, while dirty it's crusty). I usually can't sleep without it, but don't want to risk bringing it out of the house.

I've never told anyone before, except you /b/.

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>>738395852
listen to this man. could be bad, or it could be easy peasey as dealing with diverticulitis.

But in any case, see a fucking doctor, dum dum, or I'm gonna send Bluce Ree over to your house and judo chop your head until you do.

>>738387545
what the....?

My girlfriend acts like a young little girl almost everyday when we are alone. She was raped by her dad when she was 4 so i think she lost a part of youth when her father did what he did. So i have to be her "caretaker" . dont be mistaken, its usually pretty cute and i love her so much but its just so sad sometimes. Otherwise shes a very smart girl.

>>738397614
pics of her?

I had some alter reality where I wanted jay jay from zoophobia to be real and every night she made my feeling went happy everyday I loved her so much I wanted her to be real but as I grew up and became self aware and shit I just sorta stopped but. Some day JayJay Someday I love you

>>738390145
name?

Jay jay

>>738385419
When I was probably about 6, my half brother came to visit. He's 5 years older than I am. We have the same mother, but she took off and we have nothing to do with her. Anyways, we were playing Batman. He was Robin and I was Poison Ivy. We were kissing and my full blood brother walked in on us, but we played it off. I still have a weird crush on him.

>>738385419
Cheated on my ex wife five times and then had a full on affair for two years. Forbidden sex was way more pleasing than what I was supposed to be doing. I'm sure that's why the women I cheated with kept it a secret.

>>738397735
Im not really comfortable putting her pics here, not in that storys context atleast. People i know browse this shit but i can put a body pic if u like

I wish JayJay was real :(

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>>738387320
summer is here fellas

>>738390330
If this is true, then holy shit you are a badass

>>738394798
Okay, in that case, I guess that makes sense.

>>738398530
hit me with it

>>738397614
that's pretty normal. you new to ageplay/DDlg?

>>738387545
Not going to lie this aroused me.

Tasty

I want to get myself a dildo or vibrator, but I don't know where to put so my fiance doesn't find it.

>>738385419
https://m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=05Ogn09G2Y4

>>738401750
you put it in your butthole op, she'll never look there

>>738401937
Sorry anon, no butt stuff here.

>>738402046
I am confused. why do you want a dildo/vibe then?

>>738402154
My fiance is rarely in the mood to do stuff and when he is it's usually pretty quick.

>>738387974
sounds pretty standard honestly.

Not a bad secret. More of something that makes me shiver. New to the EMS field. On my second ride along with the ambulance crew, I did CPR on a 90 year old stroke patient. Though I was warned it happens a lot, I wasn't ready to feel this woman's entire sternum and the ribs connected completely crack and shatter under my hands. She was pronounced dead a couple minutes later. I know it was the stroke that killed her, but I still feel responsible.

>>738388023
you dickbag!

>>738402353
it's pretty much assumed all girls have a vibe at least. my gf has like 3.

if you really need him to not find out, just get a lipstick vibe. they're designed to be covert so you can carry them around in a handbag without being caught.

either that or just get a massager with a sore back as your cover story.

5 years sooner, i drowned my girlfriend and hidden the body after fucking her, they never found her.

When I was younger I would let my dog eat me out whenever he wanted. Laid belly down, legs spread and just let him lick as long as he wanted.
Pretty sure my mother suspected but never said anything.
I'm asexual but I would still let a dog eat me out if given the chance.

I've had many ufo encounters, mostly over the past 5 years. They landed once and attempted to communicate both telepathically (in english) and verbally (I can't describe the sound, but it wasn't human at all), but they wouldn't come into the light. I was too much of a pussy to meet them face to face that night, but I hope I get another chance.

I've been abducted once that I was aware of. My friend was too. We both came too at the same time sitting in upright positions, fully awake and without a recollection of the previous 2-3 hours.

>>738402861
one of these days you're gonna have to post a nude to go with that story.

>>738402353
>>738401750
Would he be mad about you wanting to pleasure yourself? You shouldnt have to hide it.

>>738402771
Thanks anon

>>738403057
you're welcome. knock one out for me when you get it and we'll call it even.

>>738402861
You might be zoosexual, have you tried letting a dog penatrate you? They hardly need training for such an act too, just bend over naked and he should know what to do.

I live like a block away from an ex who led me on to date her and still thinks I'm cool with her. I think about raping her a lot or just getting her to let me fuck her or at least a blowjob because she still gives me hugs and treats me very nice

>>738403055
Nice dubs anon, I just don't know how he would react if he found one.

>>738403016
let them enjoy the fantasy anon, that's half the fun of these threads.

>>738403125
That's the thing, like, actual penetration is a no go for me, never had it, don't plan on it. Which is why I think it's so weird

I've cheated on every gf I've had. When they find out, I blame them and it lowers their self esteem enough to stay with me. I feel like shit, and have crushed two people to a state of utter depression.

>>738385419
I have wasted my entire life and I have no future ahead of me.

>>738389804
did you get stuck in prison? are you ever gettin out?

I'm telekinetic, and apparently that really freaks some people out, a lot.

>>738403659
lol same.

>>738403875
If it's useful info to any anons, the same mechanisms used for telekinesis can influence a voltmeter. I can get it to register up to .135v. Haven't played with an amp reading as much, but highest so far in amps is .01 amps.

I took upskirt nudes of my science teacher and framed another kid for taking them once the rumor was out.

>>738403619
that's hot.

>>738394385
shit anon, are you me ?
You described my situation better than I would have.
The worst thing is that, in my case, ill be living alone with "the other girl" for some months, it will be soul crushing knowing the girl that makes me go crazy is just a few meters away all the time and she will never be mine.