Alright /b/, roast my smug mug and be as savage as fucking possible.

>>737485032
Go ahead and take the kid's gloves off, I'm ready for full on hurtful roasts.

when was the last time you saw your penis?

>>737485189
Bout 5 minutes ago in the shower.

>>737485189
If this is as savage as it gets then I'm sprely disappointed /b/.

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When and what was last supper?

>>737485461
Teriyaki beef stir fry over steamed rice.

>>737485032
Nigger you look like you already had a good roast recently.

>>737485461
>>737485189
Seriously /b/ step your game up.

>>737485673
More like i need a good roast, all these fucking salads are going right through me!

>>737485673
>>737485461
>>737485189
Damn I'm starting to get triggered by the sheer tameness of these posts

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>>737485032

Give me a minute to think of something.

>>737486068
I'm waiting nigga.

Come on /b/, I've seen edgy kids on >>>/co/ that are more savage then you

Did i forget to mention I support Trump?

I guess /b/ lost its edge for roasting a straight white male who voted and supports Trump.

>>737485032
Suck trumps cock!

>>737487118
All this weakness is putting me to slerp

>>737485032
You are so fucking autistic that you couldnt figure out how to rotate that picture of some fat fuck you pulled off google

>>737487496
Check the date numbnuts, that IS my face.

>>737485032
You're just another fat guy on 4chan. Nothing special or out of ordinary. Frankly you are too basic to roast. Go work out if you have this much free time to spam refresh on this terrible thread.

Dickfart.

>>737487849
Nigga it's 1 AM.

>>737488013
This is just pathetic.

>>737485032
post dick

>>737485032
Don't get him laughing too her guys, don't want that second chin to jiggle so hard it throws the earth off orbit

>>737487575
Your face? I thought that was a fat shovel with down syndrome.

>>737488531
That got a smile anon
>>737488628
Oh we got a pro here! This should be good.

>>737488749
Glad ididnt make you laugh op. Wouldn't want to speed up global warming by locking us closer to the sun

I guess /b/ really is full of mealy mouthed cucks with no balls. Probably explains why everyone posts women getting BLACKED.
>>737489396
Look on the bright side, with higher oceans you'd probably have beachfront property

>>737485032
For real though, OOPS? Why does your nose look like a bird beak and your eyebrows look like one of those li ed birds pekple draw as kids when they can't draw that's just an "m"? Is your pic side ways cause you've fallen and can't get up? Was that Georgia earthquake You?

>>737489588
Wow new phone with terrible autocorrect. Not even gonna try and fix this just figure this shit out yourself OP

>>737485032
Are you cracking that smile cause you finally saw your first side boob or because you finally touched your sister in her sleep?

>>737489684
The fact that it's that bad is kekworthy enough.

>>737489773
No I'm just a smug cunt by nature.

>>737489773
Or is it because in the midst of your fall you just barely saw the tip of your dick for the first time I'm in your life?

>>737489862
See above

>>737485032
Can you show me the way of the sword OP senpai?

>>737485032
gun in mouth, brains on ceiling, body not discovered until the stench becomes unbearable, corpse cremated by the state because no one cared enough to claim it, ashes tossed into a dumpster / 10

>>737485032
Are your eyes dark because you're tired or because your dad beats you because you won't move out of his basement?

>>737490042
Damn i didn't know i was that drop dead sexy anon, you just made me blush

>>737490054
you're a grammatical retard

>>737490054
Lack of sleep. I spent my nights writing.

>>737490121
>you just made me blush

you know that doesn't count as sex right...you are still a virgin

>>737490242
Please anon, buy me a drink first. I'm not that kind of girl.

>>737490147
How is he a retard?

>>737490197
Writing your screen play so you can hit it big OP? Who do you have playing You? Tom cruise?

>>737490650
More like a series set in the 1920's about a young detective wanting to take down a ruthless mob boss who murdered his family.

>>737490814
How original

>>737490984
Entertainment isn't supposed to be original. It's about telling the same tropes over and over again. Good beats evil. Things happen for a reason.

>>737490984
Besides, a show set during Prohibition umong a market saturated with capeshit is pretty unique

You look like you masturbate to tentacle porn and live in a basement

>>737491512
You do know you just described 4chan in a nutshell right?

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>>737485032
You look like a retarded version of that fat cop in heroes who

>>737491770
Weird, i was always told i look like Jack Black who's career hit rock bottom.

>>737485032
You look like you scribbled a fake mustache and cool guy soul patch combo with a pen

>>737491973
It's natural, it's just been growing back shorter and shorter every time i shave.

>>737485032
Are you a virgin op?

Your face is so fat the .jpg tipped over

>>737492238
No, but i am tired.

>>737485032
Op let me guess you have insomnia

>>737492369
No shit.

How many white vans and bags of candy do you own?

>>737485032
You can't sleep so because your life sucks and you have nothing to get up for tomorrow's anyways. You didn't stay up late on a Friday to go out with friends or socialize because you have no friends. You have no girlfriend. No real reason to stay up late other than posting on fucking 4chan like every other loser.

>>737492589
Zero and zero.

>>737492634
But explain why you're posting this late anon.

>>737485032
you look like if you didnt have computer skills you'd be a lot fatter.

>>737492771
That's a phone picture anon.

>>737492728
Can't sleep. "Insomnia"

Sir may I say that I am glad that you are alive
Because no matter how said or depressed I am I can always say "at least I'm not that sad fat fuck I saw on 4chan"

>>737485032
You're tubby

Also who shit on your face and forced you to call it facial "hair"

>>737485032
You look like a domestic violence victim

>>737492904
Also, I don't go out because i find people irl as assholes due to being cynical bastard.
>>737493018
Glad i could cheer you up fam.

>>737493164
The only thing beating my ass is life.

>>737485032
You appear to be slightly overweight and should feel bad about that because you let your body reach an unhealthy weight through what one can assume to be a lazy routine and unhealthy diet. For shame tubbers

>>737493170
Your one of those motherfuckers who thinks they are smarter than everyone because your lonely and spend all your time on the internet

>>737493155
This put a smile on my face.

>>737493233
Jesus Christ somebody get this faggot a violin

>>737485032
Seriously it looks like someone is beating you. How is your home life?

>>737493323
No i just generally hate people. Including myself. So getting roasted helps me feel humble and reminds me I'm just as shitty as everyone else.

>>737493528
Relax it's just sleep deprivation.

>>737493244
If i wanted condescending I'd go to church on Sundays

>>737493537
Why do you hate people? Because they are not fat and depressing and they don't throw pity parties for you?

>>737485032
How many twinkies did you eat today? How many cans of boyardee?

>>737493725
No, I'm just not a people person. Besides, I'm technically not racist if i hate everyone right?

>>737485032
You're fat

>>737493852
Zero and zero. I actually hate Twinkies.

>>737493853
The fact that you had to clarify that makes me feel like you are a racist. Plus you've said nigger a few times so I'm guessing you are an racist

>>737485032
Am writer. Don't look like santa Claus's retarded elfs face fucked a magical tub of I can't believe its not butter. Also don't look like I cut my dick out of repressed tard rage for being beaten by mommy when she caught you touching yourself with her good eyebrow plucking tweasers. Go supersize another diet Coke you fat cunt and do everyone a favor and wheel your fat ass off a bridge. America is diabetic enough with out the Pillsbury dough boys chunk uncle trying to slide his greased ass into last year's speedo

>>737493884
And you suck at insults.

>>737493853
So now we got a fat, depressed, fuckin sleep deprived possible child molester AND he's a racist. And you wonder why your lonely and have a shitty life.

>>737494009
Don't be sanctimonious, you've probably said nigger countless times too.

>>737494021
Cuck 10/10 totally ignored the ripe ass rek last posted

>>737494167
Suck a nigger dick that word is racism incarnate

>>737494173
It's so incoherent that i couldn't stop laughing

>>737494303
Must be ADHD as fuck to follow. No regrets it's like a secret language at this point

>>737494167
Hey no need to be slangin big words that I don't understand around. We get it your way more clever than the rest of us. Even though you probably had to check your spelling on google, faggot.

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>>737494015
>Am writer. Don't look like santa Claus's retarded elfs face fucked a magical tub of I can't believe its not butter. Also don't look like I cut my dick out of repressed tard rage for being beaten by mommy when she caught you touching yourself with her good eyebrow plucking tweasers. Go supersize another diet Coke you fat cunt and do everyone a favor and wheel your fat ass off a bridge. America is diabetic enough with out the Pillsbury dough boys chunk uncle trying to slide his greased ass into last year's speedo

Holy fuck, can i save this as pasta?!

I'm not sure if you're a skinny Hawaiian or a fat Mexican bitch with drawn on eyebrows.
You look like that one Mexican bitch who said she looked the Mona Lisa get the fuck off my website you degenerate piece of shit how's it feel yo know that the only time you get any semblance of attention is from random people on the internet whose sole purposed for talking to you is to roast you in a shitty excuse for attention you fat fuck

>>737485175
What

>>737494428
Read a single book you ignorant cunt. It doesn't take that long to deduce what a word means when you READ it in context.

>>737494488
Yes. Am also drunk so I'm applauding my spelling.

>>737494499
Now it's getting good.

>>737485032
You look like your 9 months pregnant

>>737494692
With triplets

>>737494692
Weaker than your father's erection.

>>737485032
You remind me of myself.

>>737495219
Fat, divorced, and a failure as a father?

>>737493725
Also i don't need pity, i need you fuckers to be absolutely savage.

>>737495379
Fat, lonely, and never gonna make it as a screenwriter. Not divorsed or a failed father so OP is worse.

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>>737485032
Is this you op?

>>737485175
By the looks of it, you've had enough roasts for a lifetime.

>>737489550
There's already one beached whale there.

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>>737485032
Op..?

>>737485032
You think you'd lose a few pounds from all those truffle shuffles your uncles made you do. And by the way, bacon grease isn't a recommended replacement for face wash, you sweaty tub of fucking lard

>>737496977
Huehuehuehuehue

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You look like Robbie Rotten's fat brother eating all of his hospital sick fuck

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>>737485032
Fred Fuckstone's illegitimate son looking ass