Alright /b/ what is the most savage brutal badass thing you've

Killed 11 puppies by beating their heads against a tree. Not crazy just needed to get rid of my dogs litter.

>>737007088
I once clipped my toe nails directly onto the carpet instead of into a waste bin

Mom was stepping on toe nail clipping for two whole days before she vacuumed my room

It was pretty hardcore

>>737007708
Damn that's pretty metal

>>737007708
Lucky I don't report you to the Google special investigation task force, they can get your ip address like that.

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i once used a dremel to grind a wart off my thumb

>>737007088
Busted a dudes head open with a big ass rock. Gnarly ass scar

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>>737007708

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Broke my glasses

>>737007552
If you don't think that's crazy, there's something wrong with you

>>737009113
I got a verruca of my big toe with sand paper so i an kinda relate.

>>737007088
I'm no mechanic, but I don't think that's a tire tool...

>>737009987
No but it's pretty feirce looking

>>737010069
/agree

I cut my big toes nail too short on both feet, double ingrown nails.

Boiled some pliers and dunked my feet in ice water until they went numb, then shoved the pliers under the nails on each side and lifted the nails out then jammed cotton under so they wouldn't sink again.

On the second foot the pliers slipped and the nail snapped so I had to rip one side of the nail off completely. Lots of blood.

Didn't pass out though.

Played a video game during a thunderstorm.


And I didn't save once.

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>>737007088
i called op a fag

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>>737007088
This. Just now.

I once fongered my moms car in the back of here friend.

Still feel kind of bad about it ;/

>>737011650
Always gets a laugh out of me

I stubbed my big toe on my coffee table while the lights were off

>>737007088
>savage brutal badass
Sounds pretty edgy.

>>737011777
trips

Pissed into my gfs ass

>>737009987
>>737010941
What do you mean? If you need a tool to fuck up some asshole's tires, I can't think of anything better.
My only suggestion would be to removed some of the nails so that the force is distributed over a smaller area

>>737007088
I blew away a beaver with incendiary ammunition. Pretty rad. It tried to run and dive into the water, but it kept burning from the inside. You could watch it burning at the bottom of the pond.

>>737011650
How to make mustard gas and kill yourself.

i used to "liberate" dogs from back yards in the hood. it was with a rescue group that did outreach in shitty areas of the city

Bought some mice for a pet snake. Snake died, had to kill the left over mice. Shot a torch into the back of one's head to see how fast it's brain would fry. Just threw the other in a metal coffee can, soaked it in alcohol and lit it up.

In hindsight, I was a fucked up teen.

>>737012463
So you stole some niggers dog? Wtf man.

Used a gaswelder to close a wound.

>>737012074
Dude, that's like the #1 way to get a girl pregnant. Did she have to get an abortion after?

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>>737007088
Alright, time for some thruth. I browse reddit occationally at work because its mostly SFW.
Now im home and see this faggot op asking the same question thats is on the first page of Ask reddit here. Kys for crossposting you nigger

>>737012463
>>737012550
Sounds like he just let them loose on the street. Definitely an action that would result in lulz. You know you're in a shit part of Dallas because of the stray dogs.

>>737012550
only the ones that where clearly being neglected. most of them living outside chained up and not givin water or food and not having a shelter or anything to get out of the weather. its funny how most of the niggers would get a dog to "protect" their property. all we had to do was give these dogs some food and they would pretty much just come with us.

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>>737012483
You could have just...brought them back to the pet store for credit, or released them....

Beat a chicken to death with a large stick at age 9.

Im noy psycho, it was at my aunties farm and had to catch it, I tried to daze it or knock it out but one clean swing later and its head came ofg.

>>737012759
it was with a rescue group, most of the dogs where able to be adopted out to good people.

A kid got mad I beat him at apehoop and threw the ball at the back of my head. I swung round and one punch KO'd him and left. Found out he got severe brain damage from it and became veg tard. I was 12 he was 10

Morale of the story, dont fuck with me. I hit harder than even I know is capable.

I had sex in the missionary position.

>>737007088
>husband wakes me up
>"t-t-theres s-s-someone in the h-house"
>at least once a month this shit happens
>hes got that sleep hypnogogic bullshit where he sometimes hears a bang when he falls asleep
>groggily grab gun
>hold it at the ready
>look down the hall
>pitch black hallway
>living room is lit partially from the street light
>dark figure comes around the corner
>"STOP!"
>figure drops somethingand reaches for something
>fire three shots
>hits the ground
>another dark figure runs up the stairs and trips and lands headfirst into table
>the ringing in my ears is a mixture of the shots and adrenaline and my heart going from 0-100mph
>husband is screaming
>"SHUT THE FUCK UP CHRIS!!! Call 911 now"
>flip the halway light on
>walk down
>guy I shot is laying motionless
>gun near his hand
>kick it down the hall
>guy who smacked his head is having some sort of seizure and bleeding profusely from the head
>check him for weapons
>pull gun from waistband and toss it down the hall
>two fucking niggers
>boyfriend tosses me the phone
>describe their conditions
>seizure nig starts coming around mumbling and jibbering
>4 minutes later an army of police arrive

The dead nigger was dead when EMS got there. The seizure nigger spent a week in a coma. He was ultimately charged with robbery, attempted murder, felon in possession, and murder.

I almost died too. I had no idea the first nigger got a shot off that hit the bedroom door at head height. Only found out when I started cleaning after the crime scene people left and saw the tape on the door.

>>737013058
Lol sounds like you're still 12.

>>737007088
I am not much of a badass, one time I cut a huge skintag off with a pair of scissors

I didn't do it. I walked with my larger size dog off the lead in the dark. Suddenly he's gone, and I start hearing the most horrifying yells, some mix of a bark and cries. It made me think of the goatman creepy pasta.

Anyway, turns out my dog killed a deer. He came home all bloody around his mouth.

>>737013366
Dont cut them off.

Thread them with floss. Tie a loop, tighten it around the base as tight as you can, tie another couple knots and leave it. In 4-5 days it will die and fall off, no blood and only a tiny scar.

>>737012170
You blew a beaver? You sure it was a beaver and not a cock? Where i come from guys are supposed to fuck beaver is why i ask.

My dogs cornered a stray cat and almost killed it. It was suffering so I cut its head off with a shovel

>be me 13
>nieghbors go on vacation
>fuckinghatenieghbors.jpg
>get gasoline and matches
>go to nieghbors house
>poor gas around nieghbors house
>lite match and drop in gas
>runlikehell.exe
>watch house burn down from a distance

i never got caught for this

>>737007088
That's not badass. Your a fucking sociopath and a loser, we don't live in metalocalypse

>>737011726
Trying too hard mate. Maybe next time.

>>737014106
Bullshit. Firefighter, here. We know where fires start, hiw they start, the composition of octane, and therefore where the octane was purchased, and furthermore have access to security footage of all persons who bought fuel. So it's highly unlikely you never were caught if you're a neighbor, dumbass.

>>737014444
Of course that useless post would be the first time that I get quads.

>>737014584
didnt say how old he is now, also could've been in a shit town with a notsogood fire dept/investigative force

>>737014584
>composition of octane, and therefore where the octane was purchased,

Bullshit, tanker driver here. Except for a scant few proprietary gas stations all gas comes from the same trucks

>>737014082
2/10

Tried too hard. Sounded like a joke from the 1960s. Do better next time.

Made a gas grenade thst burns then explodes after gas release.

Decapitated several insects and put them in my head collection.

Tortured and killed live frogs.

Picked one up, fed it, played with it (laser pointer chasing and biting) (frogs chase laser dots and lunge at them), and cut the motherfucker in half out of nowhere.

It was so fucking funny.

Blood was pouring out of it so I took a stick, flipped the upper body,

>still alive

And stabbed it in the throat.

Blood bubbles formed.

That was a good day because I found a second frog later.

>>737013155
If you are gay, cool story bro. If you are straight, then you seriously need to find a better husband. And don't give me any bullshit about him either. You are married to a fucking faggot who's clearly worthless

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>>737007088
pulled out my finger nail on my little pinger using tweezeras twice now, started by biting the nail really short then use tweezers to twist thhe last part out of the nail bed, it hurts at first but after awhile the pain goes away when you get into it and theres blood everywhere

Just some random shit I can remember:

Got a cut on my arm at work (dishwasher), couldn't keep a bandage on it so I waited for a hot pan to come back and cauterized it.

Got drunk at a xmas gift exchange and sliced my friends thumb webbing when he didn't appreciate what I gave. He went to the hospital got like 20 stitches then came back to keep drinking.

Not great but hey I'm not an exceptional man.

>>737017189
You seem like a complete retard.

>>737017545
Hey thanks man

>>737013155
if femanon best wife ever

I call teachers bad names in my mind when I get bored during courses. I also get bitches the same way

>>737015478
>l-l-look at me g-g-guys I'm so edgy!
Get lost faggot

>>737007088
Pissed into a soft top car from a old bridge while they were queuing
>I've done this a few times now
Also gone curb crawling then when the whore gets close enough throw flour on her then my friends follow with eggs

>>737012309
Newfag

>>737018800
Shouldn't the eggs come first?

There was one this inbred redneck kid who lived in my old neighborhood. When me and my little brothers would go out and play in the complex we lived in, he would ride by shirtless on his bike and shout the worst things he could at us. I was 13, my little brothers 10/8 and this fucker had to be 17-18.

My parents were working, and one day, my little brothers come in crying, saying this asshole spat on them and tried running them over. I stepped outside and saw the fucker circling on his bike.

I snapped the largest stick I could off of a dead tree we had next to the house, this fucker was going to get it. I don't know what got into me, but he was riding by and must have not noticed me. I threw this stick like a fuckin javelin and as though guided by God, it got stuck in his front spokes and sent this fucker flying.

His face was fucked and I think he was still wondering what the fuck happened. I retrieved the stick from his spokes and began cracking it across his back. He squealed like a pig and began to look like an abused bitch quick.

Fucker didn't come near us again.

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>>737011650
everytime

During grade 4-5 whilst playing sport, T-Ball or something of the like, was on 3rd base catching, and a batter came running past, so I randomly decided to put my arm up across his path... Coathangered the poor kid, got in so much shit that day

Not hard core but kinda funny

I work in the cadaver lab of my school and we had to open a skull midsagitally and we couldnt get the saw down deep enough so I had to pull the skull open with what we had left and I heard it crack and split in my hands

>>737007088
>first
My friend and I were sitting on a high bank of a fast moving river when we were kids. He kept talking shit while we were throwing rocks in the river.

I picked up a rock the size of about a cantaloupe and threw it really hard while aiming at his head. I wasn't thinking I'm gonna hit this fucker with this big ass rock, I kinda tried to hit him on accident. So, I hit him and he fell lifelessly into the almost rapids river.

I jumped in after him and held his head out of the water so I guess it's not the most brutal.

>second
Got a bb/pellet gun. Same bff and I ran into our creek behind my house and tried for hours to find a squirel or something. We finally found a crow that flew down near us in a tree. We both ran at it and shot it. It flapped like crazy and fell to the ground. We shot it again and it wouldn't die.

I looked at my friend and asked, "how the fuck do we kill it?" he shrugged and said, "Idk." seeing it suffer I did the only humane thing I could think. I stepped on that fucker until it stopped moving. Took literally about 10 mins of stomping on this bird until it stopped.

We both cried like little faggots the rest of the day

>third
Went to rival hs party. Bunch of dudes wanted to fight. Was wwhs on the front of this rich kids lawn. I took this baseball bat off this kid. Snuck behind him, grabbed the bat, and knocked him in the face with it.

I didn't do this next brutal part, but was a part of it. Friend grabbed the bat and went up on this one kid trying to get up after getting knocked down. He came up behind this kid and bashed the back of his head in. Everyone stopped and went "oooooooh"

Was fucked up. He got arrested.

>>737007088
Ive killed a man.
It was self defense and i left court with no charges.
But sticking a knife into someone is a feeling that sticks with you forever.
>i can still feel it vividly
>im almost ashamed to say i liked it.

>>737018484
Suck a nigger's dick, fucking faggot cuck.

>>737020933
Story ab the fight. What state?

>>737012483
I killed a mouse that was caught in a glue trap with my air soft gun. One shot in the head is better than hours of pain and suffering imo.

Go to 4chan and came never back
>>737007088

>>737019175
No

>>737014780
Bullshit, Tank here. It is always a different composition, if only slightly.

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>>737007088
In essence, its not sad and pathetic that you killed a deer.
But it IS sad and pathetic that you think killing an immobile deer is "bad ass"

Are you 12?
Do you have the mental maturity of a 12 y/o?
>most certainly

One time back in high school I accidentally kicked one of my family's dogs down the stairs. I laughed first, but quickly freaked the fuck out.
thank god the dog wasn't hurt.

>>737018865
Hi Anon. I see you called someone a "faggot" I'm assuming you meant this jokingly, but I've been mulling this over in my head for several minutes and it does not sit right.

Let me please (re)iterate you on this word. Not only does it aim hatred at a large group of people that I myself and many of my friends are a part of, the word has the power to tear down and undermine a fight that we have been fighting for decades. I don't know where you stand on the issue, but I'm assuming you value your rights to equality as a citizen of this country.

You may think that this is only a word, a mere configuration of letters, but this word is the foundation that keeps LGBT people held in the depths of inequality, while men like yourself toss around hateful slurs in a joking way thinking immaturely that you are immune to hurting anyone. This is not true. Next time you throw this word out (however jokingly and privately you may thing you are using this- in this era NOTHING is ever private), think about those who have struggled for the right to feel safe in their own country.

The word "faggot" creates a hostile environment and makes many LGBT people feel unsafe around those who have enough power in society to use such words. Don't make me feel unsafe. I have a right to my safety. And although I have tremendous pride in being a mature, strong, bisexual woman, it really sucks when your words get in the way of my pride. Thanks for your attention.

>>737022054
Dubs faggot

>>737022054
faggot

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>>737022054

>but I've been mulling this over in my head
God, thats so comfy

>>737021907

Bullshit. Gasoline here. I am all the same. I am constant. You will never stop me.

I had consensual sex in the missionary position with the lights on for the sole purpose of procreation after I was married.

>>737022054
Nigger! :D

>>737007552
wtf?

next time just put them into a garbage bag and toss it into a river. That's what PETA does.

>>737007088
>>737021998

He is right ya know

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>>737007708

>>737007088
Why not free it? Was it too far gone?

>>737007088
Killed a canada goose with a golf club after it got maimed from getting hit with a golf ball.
I guess that was pretty savage

>>737007552
How about not letting your dog have pups if you dont want to take care of them? Are you stupid?

>>737022791
Are you gay or something?

>>737021671
I just put them in a plastic bag and smack it against the wall

>>737020933
>i left court with no charges.
This doesn't make sense you lying retard. You get charged before going to court.

I once threw a big rock on a chicken and killed it (i was about 11)

Sometimes when i cut the grass i chop frogs with the lawn mower

>>737007088
Broke into an abandoned insane asylum but left after 10min to hide from security

>>737023385
Just break its neck. Its what i would have done at least

Me and a retard spiked as much drinks as we could in a club mainly with underage children with MDMA crystals for the lulz

>>737024416
>underage children
>club
Pick one faggot.