Have you ever turned down free pussy? If so, what's your

>>737000429
You get what you pay for?

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She was 16 and I was 25. I upheld the law. Stillfeelsgoodman.jpg

ugly/fat

>>737000429
I brushed away several fatties. I just can't do it. Fuck a fattie.

>>737000519
pic related?

>>737000561
This tbh. I can get decent pussy almost anytime - if a chick takes off her clothes and it looks like an avalanche made out of uncooked dough, no thanks. If I can do better, I'm gonna.

Lots of anons with high standards I see.

>>737000429

My neighbor, I was a sophomore she was 10/10 a year older. Rumor was she had herpes, people just spreading bullshit because jealousy. She only dated college dudes, one day we end up partnered on student committee. She flirts a lot, surprised by interest. We end up hanging out all the time. Giving me signals, in her room she asks me if I'm into her. Tell her as a friend and don't do anything because of rumors, should have know they weren't true, known her most of my life. Never get the chance again

When I came back from my first year in college, find out she started sleeping with my dad her senior year of HS. Cucked myself into being cucked by dad, WTF

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my ex wanted to jump my bones when she was back in town after she had gotten married, but I pussed out

>>737001459
bullshit story, she clearly has herpes now after sleeping with your dad

>>737000429
She was a whore and i had a reputation to uphold

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>>737000429
>Turned down free head and to lose my virginity
Not my type

She was a clingy emotional train wreck who wanted me to marry her.

Fuck that shit man.

Though I did fuck her once. It was awesome. I picked her up from her house and she wore this long jacket with a red silk nighty and no panties.

Fucked her on the hood of my car.

You cunts are gay.

>>737000613
Fat chicks are like mopeds. Fun till your friends catch you on one

My penis is too small and I didn't want to be embarrassed

She had the ugliest set of teeth I had ever seen. After I turned her down she called me a faggot. I punched her in her stupid ugly teeth. Cut my hand. Got infected.

>>737000429
Wow that's a really nice looking vagina you've got there.

>>737001940
Was she cute in the face?

>>737001618

That shit turned into some real drama, my parents didn't divorce but fuck that was the worst couple weeks being home. At one point, my dad was drunk and my mom kept asking him why he did it. He point blank looked her in the face and told her she doesn't take care of herself, that his dick can't get hard when he thinks about fucking her, why wouldn't he fuck some hard body 18 yo. Mom fucking rage cried, after they worked it out, she started running and using an exercise ball. The truth hurts, I hated him for doing that to her, but love that dude no matter what. He's a cool mother fucker

>>737002091
Good for you don't hit women!

>>737002154
Hey I'm a feminist. I believe in equality. If a guy or girl comes at me I'm taking them down.

Yeah I did, So I was 14 at the time.


My friend got this fat gf and she brought her friend, I had heard rumors of her being a bit slutty, so I sperged out a bit.

I just acted like a jackass all day long, bieng obnixious, trying to make her laugh, and it worked, she wanted my dick.

We watched a movie together and had her tits all up on me, I was getting second base all day there


But then she wanted to dtae, and I relazied, that I had faked my entire personality for this, and I didnt want to contnure to do so, because honestly, I was bieng a faggot.

I eventually start to ignore her and this makes her mad at me etc, she eventually reconclied in the future, but nows shes married to a dude that has a lot of the same traits I do, am happy she found someone.

>>737001930
>Not my type
She didn't have a penis?

>>737002137
nobody cares, also your dads a bitch

>>737001609
Gross trim that jungle

>>737002109
I'm pretty ambivalent towards vaginas, more of a tits and ass man, what's so nice about that one? They all look the same to me.

>strip club with the bois
>couple sitting a few tables over
>i get called on stage to get a sticker
>sticks it in ger gstring ass-side
>crawls around on all fours
>everytime i get close to biting it out...
>ACCELERATE
>seems like hours now
>DJ loses patience. Tells me to grab her and get it done
>grab and growl
>fumbling efforts seem to endear me to the blondey wife
>hubby asks me to come home and fuck her

Wat? Fuk that. Never dog the bois!

>>737002250
that makes you a criminal, not a feminist. fucking retard justifying violence against women with your dumb anger about women wanting rights. fucking disgusting piece of shit degenerate.

Bunch of pussy beggars in this thread. You'd let a woman walk over you if she'd have sex with you. This is why weak men are born because you think you deserve sex rather than making it something fulfilling. Your children will inherit you ilk and they will suffer a worse fate than you. I'm just saying that the world is full of whores for a reason. Most likely the one you love most is getting her body used up as much as you want to fuck,

>>737002336
No beef curtains.

I turned down my wife last night, it was 3 am and I was tired. She expects to wake me up in the middle of the night and do all the work.

>>737002124
She still is sexy as fuck. But too much drama for me.

>>737000429
Yeah like five times because crippling anxiety. My shit barely works anyway.

I turned it down but after like a few strokes. She was on of my best female friends except she had a bf who i sort of liked so i cut that shit short.

>>737000429
my girlfriend was home and the other bitch was out of town so we would have had to fuck at my place.

Just didnt reply to her.

>>737002475
Damage was already done, why not enjoy it?

>>737002392
I'm not angry that women want rights. I'm angry when someone steps up to me and expects me to just take it. I have never hit anyone who wasn't stepping up. Respect your self and respect others

They were fat whales so I don't want my winkie in fat sloppy pussies

>>737002554
But do you let them blow you? Fat chicks give the best head

>>737000429
>couple of years ago
>be me, 29yo
>just came of a bad breakup, had my heart broken
>girl I know (22yo by then) makes some advances
>we agree on dinner, just to talk somewhat
>we have a little too much wine
>talk starts to turn to relationship stuff
>turns to when we had sex for the last time
>we agree to become friends with benefits, no stings attached
>start with the benefits right that night
>after a week of occasional sex with her, it kinda felt like she was starting to stalk me
>she confesses her feelings for me
>don't want to break her heart like mine was broken just a few weeks before
>turn down free pussy

So, how much of a feggit am I?

>>737002530
Just felt like the thing to do. plus I was not expecting it so i nearly nutted, didnt want to have some premature ejaculation story kicking about.

>>737000429
turned down fatties, oldies, ugly gals and I once turned down a tinder hookup.

For the first ones I guess my excuse is I could never get drunk enough to withstand their presence. The tinder chick I turned down because I'm living in a STD prone area.

was offered to come to a girls place because parents not at home and "let's see how it goes" and up to this day I don't know the fucking answer why I was such a huge faggot to not go.
The only thing that was some kind of "problem" was that I was 18 (drivers licence at 18 here) and I didn't have my own car and would have been forced to ask my dad if I can have his (to go somewhere over the night"). Guess that's the only real "reason" other than being brainless not to go. FUCK why did I have to think about that again and feel bad...

>>737000429
yes

don't stick your dick in crazy.

>>737000429
>I was 15 she was 13
>I had just met this girl
>slightly chubby but a real qt
>start to finger her
>pull fingers out to starts taking off my pants and fuck.
>notice smell from fingers...
>say give me a second to do something
>leave room and throw up everywhere
>she noticed and like a dummy asked what's wrong.
>lie and say I got food poisoning from earlier.
>don't fuck cause pussy smelt like super death.

>>737002645
saw your chance to show off and look cool to strangers youll never meet huh. fagget

>>737000429
There is no such thing as

>Free pussy

there is always strings attached

>>737002450
Just be dominate and everything will work itself out.

Most of the times reason was that I was married and did not want to cheat. Once I declined because she was drunk, smelt really bad (few days drinking, lots of garlic and no shower or any kind of washing) and looked like she had got beaten or something. She was nice to talk with though so I did not run away immediately. We talked bit and it turned out she slipped while being drunk and fractured few facial bones few days earlier. She was very nice and I could have managed to stomach her frankensteinish looks (stitches, bruises etc) but that smell was just too much. One another time it was someone I had affair with earlier but I got that inner alarms ringing that she might be trouble if I stay longer so I friendzoned her... She still wanted sex and it was pretty hard to say no (sex with her was amazing) but it would not have worked as fwb way either, I wanted to move on.

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>>737000519
>living in a state where the age of consent is above 16
>actually caring anyway
t. cuck

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>>737002802
Why can't people keep their shit clean...

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FREE pussy? lolno. I've had to scrape and struggle for every little piece of poon I've ever gotten.

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>>737002802
>chubby
that's when you know idiot

>>737002919
nope. they will get even more dramatic as a result.

>>737000429
A few times yes.

Drunk girls or sometimes it was me who was too drunk.
I once refused to do anything with a girl that was onto me the whole night just because she was in a complicated relationship with a friend (And as a result I lost both that friend, who truly believes to this day that I had sex, and the girl who got onto something else)
I was on the other side of that story once, it was complicated with my girl and other girls, man they have like a sixth sense for that and they exploit it at best, but I'm stubborn and like to stick to my values and not cheat.

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Guys fucking help me please...

>be me
>27
>will be 28 in september
>girl I know wants to sleep with me
>she's 22

Here's the catch, she's married and her husband served in the military

She's so beautiful and she hates niggers and liberals

she's a 10

I want to get her pregnant and steal her from her hubby too

>>737002919
Nah nigga. I've moved on. Married to a good woman.

>>737002850
you mean ropes of cum?

>>737002802
sounds like you fingered the wrong hole

>>737003160
>hates niggers and liberals
i.e conservative
>wants to cheat

sounds improbable. Don't do it if it's true.

>>737003208
nah, tampon strings

>>737003160


just fuck her, dont breed her. you dont need a bundle of bullshit of watching over your shoulder wondering if her repressed hatred of niggers is gonna get a train run on her when you step out to get scratchies.

>>737003293
ugh i'm eating you fuck

>>737000429
>Have you ever turned down free pussy?

Yes.

>If so, what's your excuse for this faggotry?

She was on the rag.

>>737000429
Wanted love...

>>737000429
coworker. things get spicy. tell her I wanna fuck she says she's on period plus she "had" hpv. have girlfriend at home. cons outweigh the pros. still got my weewee tugged

>>737003160
that's a pump and dump if I ever heard one. You don't wanna fuck with a military husband.

Also what a cunt lol, why would you ever marry such a garbage stain

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>>737000429
> run into an ex gf at a party
> been a couple years
> she has put on some weight but is still pretty
> gets late everyone has had a bit to drink
> she's being affectionate "want to.. For old times sake?"
> fuck yeah.. Easy lay, and she wasn't half bad back then
> get to her place and she starts blowing me
> clothes come off and she lays on her back with her legs up
> *dick starts to deflate*
> her stomach looks like a series of bratwurst rolls
> her pussy isn't so much trimmed as the hair has migrated to her asshole
> and her tits are sagging into her armpits
> "come here anon.. I'm ready for it!"
> *big smile* which I now destroy
> "I don't think I can Annonette.. You just aren't sexually attractive to me anymore."
> *pull up my pants and head for the door*
> I left her there on her back like a turtle crossed with a butterball turkey

Didn't speak again for a solid couple of years. No regrets.. Sometimes your cock knows best OP. Pic most definitely NOT related.

>>737001459
>>737002137
It's not like you lost anything of value, if she fucked her close friend's married dad she was probably trash anyway.

>>737002919
>Just be dominate and everything will work itself out.
>dominate

Dominate is a verb, dominant is an adjective. Did you fail 8th grade?

>>737002137
thanks for sharing annon, i have a similar story with my brother, but the girl in question hactually had a nasty STD now my bro had cauliflower penis for several weeks

>>737003253
"conservatives" are more often pieces of shit than not. In other words, fuck you cuckservative filth.

>>737000429
Quite sure I could get pussy rather easily if I needed to. I still like to keep the sex between me and my wife. She on the other hand has shown interest in girls, or more specifically one of her childhood female friends. I have no objections and it might actually be interesting to hear about her experiences. If I, on the other hand, would at some point like to see what sex is like with others, I am not ashamed to ask her because we have discussed this before. It just shouldn't involve cheating or "telling afterwards". At this point I am not very interested in having sex in general but I never fail to please my girl who is usually the one asking for sex (when she's in high spirits, and my job as a husband is to make it so that she is).

>>737000519
if your pic was her, you are a fucking idiot.

>>737003420
>You don't wanna fuck with a military husband.

Kek, military fags aren't tough without a gun. They do about 10 hours of hand-to-hand in training every year.

Another time i turned down my flatmates date.

>Flatmate has 2nd date with a girl in the flat. (wine/dine)
>Come home about 10ish and he is absolutely fucked.
>Chat a bit with them to figure out if i need to step in to salvage the date
>End up putting him to bed and entertaining his date for a little (she wanted to clean up or whatever)
>Just chatting and doing the dishes, drinking some wine
>She comes round to the same side as me (breakfast bar set up)
>She is literally leaning on me, telling me she feels bad and maybe he got too drunk because he didnt like her etc. etc.
>Tell her its because he was so nervous because you are way too pretty for him or something
>She's literally resting her pussy on my thigh.
>Comes in for a kiss
>I kiss her back a little but push her back a little
>Make some joke about not wanting to benefit from all the hard work my flatmate has put in wining and dining her only for me to fuck her.
>We laugh it off but she suddenly gets serious again and gives me the but you can fuck me if you want sort of look.
>Call her an uber and send her on her way.
>On her way out she hugs me and grabs by semi.
>I just give her a shrug like i would have fucked you but i can't

Im glad i didnt because they have now been together for 2 years

>>737002392
Fuck that noise if bitches want to get in somone face don't rely on the "girl" rule to save you or you might lose some teeth. Talk shit get mercd simple as that.

She was drunk and so was I, but I didn't want to wake up with a side order of 'accused rape' in the morning.

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>>737001930
beta.
keep rationalizing and externalizing your weakness tho

>>737003574
just sayin', it sounds stupid. why not fuck another pussy? there are more asses than stars.

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>>737000429
Licked and fingered a girl who just turned 15 when I was on my mid 20's.
Chickened out from going any further.
Chatted with her several years later and took pic related. Have fucked her legally now, but still regret not nailing her jailbait pussy.

>>737003983
kudos anon, I chickened out from fucking a 14 yo when I was 19, it hurts but whatever.

>>737002733
Did u know they invented taxi for such situations?

>>737000429
Yes a few times when i was tired in college.

>>737000429
Yep. The smell.

Not really turning it out down but here it is.

>be me 16
>Have a fun day with some friends.
>later on go to park and one girl (sorta hot) starts flirting w me .. Laughs at pretty much all my jokes n stuff
>people start going home, I go same direction as this girl
>asks me where I'm going
>say that I'm not really sure to see what she says...
>friendappears.jpg
>friend says that I'm going with him ...
>rip
>girl looks at me for a few seconds and just says bye while I'm walking away with friend.

Did I get cockblockd or was it my fault ?

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>20yo me
>ex gf off and on relationship for 3 years
>she asks me to come get some shit from her apt that I left there
>it was like 11pm
>debate an hour
>fuck it i'm not doing anything else
>go over knock on door
>no answer
>5 min later after knocking like a MF
>opens door completely naked with her best gf and says
>"come in anon, we were waiting on you"
>debate what felt like forever
>look at both of them then walk away
>I regret it but I also don't
>didn't want to go down that path with the crazy bitch ex
>regret not banging her friend she was hot AF
>live and learn
Pic related

I have. A co-worker wanted my dick in worst way. Not because I'm particularly attractive, but just because she was slut and not used to being told no when it came to sex.

But I knew for a fact she was a coal burner, enough to power a small city. There was also reports that she had herpes.

Not worth it. Even if she was clean, I don't fuck anyone that has been defiled by a colored

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>>737000429
In high school, i went over to a friend's house. We were gonna do it. We laid to "watch a movie." We went horizontal and something was wrong. I asked her "What pillow are you on?" She said "I'm not on a pillow." I don't know why I couldn't see how fat she was until then, but suddenly I realized that she had a pillow's worth of fat elevating herself above me. I got out immediately.
This other time I was drinking with my friends. They were in a relationship and the girl tells me that her aunt wanted to fuck me. I was a big slut back then, but looking at her slightly older, slightly busted aunt flirt with me, I reconsidered my ways.
Another girl reminded me too much of my mom so I broke up with her.
Once I was dating this girl who lived on campus, but me and some friendswere visiting someone who lived right off campus. My two friends passed out from Xanax but I'm hanging out with our host and her two friends. I knew the host from high school and she was a dyke but she said her friends were into me. She said they were trying to figure out who would hook up with me (slow night I know). I didn't exactly believe her due to low self esteem. And remember that girl I was seeing? I decided to didn't want to cheat on her so I loaded my drugged up friends into the car and went to see her.
Sex is just sex. It's not that big a deal.

>>737000429
Im muslim.

several times
>will not fuck exes, tried it once, it's a recepie for disaster
>will not touch the fatties, there is just this point where chicks become asexual for me
>one guy made a pass for me at a party once, almost headbutted him at the spot

never had this problem but I would not touch unhygienic girl no matter her looks
there is also the concept of "too slutty". If you know everyone in the neighbourhood had ride, it's like a russian roulette, even with a rubber
too easy chicks also kill the hunt, and that makes it unappealing

>>737004362
crazy dude

>>737000429
Yes. My friends sister, he got mad when I got drunk with her and she wanted the D. So I didn't.

>>737000429
she was fat

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>>737004142
She turned out to be a total freak too.
After finally fucking her.. I have even more regret because I could have had her for years. But I was too worried about public opinion. Legally she would've been okay at 16.

>>737003160
>wants to cheat on her husband
>is a 10
anon...

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>>737000429
Yes.
I thought i was disrespecting her.
what a faggot...

it stunk, she wasnt on pill, had bad breath....and all of them came un glued when rejected

>>737004460
If you are muslim by choice, then you should have no problem bearing with the consequences. If you are because your parents are, you're missing on a lot of life pleasures and you'll eventually regret it.

>>737004837
>tfw you realize women want to be disrespected

>>737004706
Amazingly most girls I've known from around that age range are into rough, man dominating sex; that's why if given the chance now I would take it honestly. Girls in my age range (20 -22) are becoming really bland.

>>737003160
I cant believe u even contenplated a relationship with someone so disloyal, she's a little whore fucktoy, nut ur nut and move on, the tell her husband u saw someone leaving her house, when he says to her, she will say it was u she fucked, or uve been trying to fuck her and ur just saying that, then just say nah bruh, if u want I'll just never speak to her or u again, but remember, i told the truth

Winning

>>737004904
Yeah I'm muslim by choice, and I don't mind, I don't regret it.

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>>737005070
>muslim by choice
kill yourself

More then once. Mostly im tierd as fuck from work, i get as much as pussy as i want and when i want from my gf... i had side bitches but i dumped them all, curently am texting three more ex colleges that are more then willing to come and get fucked. Im just not in the mood for all that drama,my gues is im getting old.

>>737002415
So is that all it takes to have a nice vag?

I was high as fuck and did not feel able to talk to a grill when she came to me
I was playing foosball and she came speaking with that I want dick voice like "anon, what is the purpose of this game?". I told her "you have to score a goal in the other team's gate" and left the table. My friends later told me that I was retarded.

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>>737003429
Godspeed, anon. I know this feel as well. Feels good.

I do that all the time. I can't get it up if i ain't interested in the girl.

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>>737000429
sometimes, there's a hidden cost to "free"

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>>737004384
When racism and fear of inadequacy combine to make the ultimate anon...

>>737005301
in a virgin's mind, yes

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>>737005252
Its haram, so I can't do it, sadly.

I've only turned down pussy once...
It was to be my first time...
I was 16 having a sleepover at my friends house, his cousin and her family was visiting for the weekend.
She was at least a couple years older than me and a total slut.
I was pretty heavily bullied so her advances absolutely blew me away.
She made all the moves even guiding my hand to her pussy. I remember shaking and being anxious out of my mind.
Too much anxiety:
Boner.exe failed to launch.
She got frustrated and told me to leave and never talk about it again.
feelsbadman.jpg
Fucked her older sister two years later in a similar situation except I was leading.
Win?

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>>737005373
what if

>>737000429
She was dead

>>737004460
>>>/out/

I am an objectively good looking male, I am blessed in that sense, I have alot of women that are (keyword) physically attracted to me

But im also a complete assburger and have turned down every fuqq in the last 2 years or so and played games and fapped instead

>>737005502
underrated

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>>737004925
She's in your age range now.. Definitely not bland. I on the other hand am in my mid 30's and find it harder to keep up.
Once every few months we'll fuck, and that's good because I don't want a heart attack. Pic is her describing what she thinks of as she masturbates.

>Vietnamese girl because she wanted me to come over and fuck her in her parents house. Unfortunately I got this message at work and had a deadline due that afternoon
>Airline stewardess - I wanted a fling but she was getting attached super quick and I didn't want to hurt her
>Some random bar girl who walked up and gave me her number. She came off as crazy the second night out with her but kept texting me about getting together. Didn't want to risk it
>When I was 17 at so-so 23 woman with a kid wanted me to fuck her except I had no game and didn't know how to move forward. She was drinking a beer with me in her apt and said "I have a problem that when I get drunk I get pregnant. Hopefully that won't happen again" Puts the beer down and leans back on her bed. I say "Yeah that would suck" and continue to sit on the floor.

>>737002919
Being a dominant person will get you far, but no matter how much of an alpha you are, crazy will always win out. Crazy people wear you down and short of killing them, they won't stop. In fact, being a dominant person would be a detriment, because you would be naturally inclined to resist their bullshit, and because crazy people are crazy they will view that as a challenge and will work harder to wear you down and make you submit.

>>737005808
so you're saying that crazy is more dominant than dominant

>>737004562

>>one guy made a pass for me at a party once, almost headbutted him at the spot

found the fearful faggot

>>737005596
I mean in my area they are, most of them are college junkies now including me so I guess I'm also a shithead. 30 is still young anon you should exercise.

Also when I said bland I was just saying most girls here are becoming what feminists want, entitled, workaholic, superficial cunts #NotAll

>>737005596
Is this a girl from Missouri?

>>737005951
>taking in a circle at a party
>feel someones hand at my butt
>turn around
>it's a smiling twig guy with black rimmed glasses
>tense my entire body
>stare at him without blinking contemplating what to do
>some girl notices that and pulls him away
>relax

yes, I was scared
fuck off

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>>737005998
I've been meaning to exercise more.
I know it helps with my sex drive and stamina. However 10+ hour days at a desk isn't leaving me a lot of motivation.
The company pays for 70% of my gym membership as part of the benefits package though. Just haven't been taking advantage of it.

>>737006057
She's not.


The other disappointment is that she has put on 30lbs since our first legal hookup.
May not seem like much.. But she's only 5'2" and it completely changes her look.

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>>737006108
>>737006108

>stare at him without blinking contemplating what to do

topkek

>>737003574
t. welfare collector

>>737002685
Clever. Good fap material for later.

>>737005909
Yes, dominant people are still people and can be worn down. It doesn't matter how dominant you are because crazy people won't care and will continue to play their game with you and manipulate you and you will either leave or become so emotionally broken that you have a complete personality change. It isn't worth the pussy or perceived affection.

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>>737000429

I'm not attracted to humans.

>>737006794
that's so hawt

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>>737000429
Yes. When you grow up you'll learn that some pussy just isn't worth it.

>>737000429
>She was 15, I was 19.
>Another one had a boyfriend at that time, I was beta.
Others were not pretty enough, so that's okay.

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>>737006826

>>737003895
>Having no standards is alpha as fuck

>>737006475
I get you bruv but still, you should run for at least 30 minutes. It isn't a lot but for someone with no stamina you should feel the benefits within a couple of weeks.

You should try to make your relationship a power-couple sort of relationship, start exercising and after a while invite her to join you; she'll see your progress and will most likely accept.

Short gals do change alot when they put on some weight but they get toned easier, 5'6 gym junkie here.

>>737003160
Generally not worth the trouble that inevitably follows fucking a married woman... even more so a military wife. Not because the husband is a super marine or some shit... but because I've never met a military spouse that wasn't 20 different kinds of batshit crazy.

>>737000429

I was drunk and she was kinda ugly and dumb, but i fingerbanged her twice tho

>20, second year at university.
>Virgin
>Temporary hot German girlfriend.
>Read some stupid shit online about how "you should never fuck until the third date" and actually believed it.
Was with her in my Schlafzimmer, auf mein Bett. She climbed in too, and we were making out.
>Played around and her nipple slipped out from her bra.
>Didn't seem to care.
>She even tried ...twice... to climb on top of me, so I pushed her off and carried on kissing her
>Eventually we went to sleep
>Single duvet so right on top of each other
>Started to move my hand down
>Chickened out
>Rock hard boner... even more annoying because my previous encounter (different girl) failed because of whisky dick.
>In Morning, still with a massive boner, fapped for a long time.
>Would have been a great first fuck.

Gutted, but I have had plenty more since so it wasn't too bad. She would have been in top three looking girls though.

>>737007362
this is acceptable

>>737000519
I was 25 she was 17. Her mother kicked me out after finding us dry humping on the couch. Her mother kept me away from her.

>>737007897
what a fucking cunt

>>737005498
but then you'd be mike myers, and should probably kill yourlsef

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>>737007217
I'll give it a go.. I used to work out.
Managed 10km in 50min at my peak.
Went to a trampoline park two weeks ago and could taste lung blood after 15min.. So I know I'm terribly out of shape.
Could feel muscle pain for a week in my torso.

As for being a power couple.. We aren't a couple. Both of us have long term relationships that are sexually unsatisfactory. It's an ongoing affair.
We've discussed the possibility of dating.. But the issues it would cause in both our lives would be ridiculous. Years of secrecy and denial would collapse almost all of both our friend networks.

>>737007958
he didnt though, they just dry humped.

>>737000429

once. She was a Russian immigrant, and like 17. I was 21. She wanted me to take her virginity, and at first I was down with it, and then I wasnt.

I ended up calling up my ex on the night I was supposed to fuck the Russian and doing my best to knock the bottom out of her ass. Sex with someone who knows how to fuck is always better than sex with a virgin

>>737008682
i would have agreed with you in the past, anon, but i'd pop a cherry any day as long as she was reasonbly attractive

>>737006761
sounds like you've had experience

>>737008323
Give me a last name initial.

>>737000429
Self esteem. My hand is always better than a 4/10 or less.

Hell, it's often better than 6/10s.

>Started working a retail job when I was 19.
>No specific training or certifications, just a new-hire learning the store.
>Fast-foward a month.
>Goes good, chill with a handful of the coworkers after/before work sometimes.
>One girl coworker wants to hang out with me after our closing shifts.
>"Okay sure, I'm not doing anything."
>Keep in mind she's a 6'3, 400+ pound shygirl.
>She comes over to my place, and we start playing some Smash brothers.
>Get two or three rounds in.
>"Hey, I'm gonna take a quick piss, I'll brb."
>Go to my bathroom, do my business, and come back to my room.
>She is fully naked, bent over my bed.
>Immediately leave and walk away from my own house.

>>737008997
yeah, he's had experience, but if you haven't, i'd recommend that you get the mind-blowing fuck marathon that comes with sticking your dick in crazy. you'll regret it eventually, but there's years of orgasms that you won't regret in between now & then

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>>737002137
Looks like some of his extra chromosomes were passed on to you.

>>737009109
4s are untouchable I agree,
but some 6s are the best.
They know they are medicore and do the very best they can to make themselves appear better.

They take care of themselves, they take care of you and are more willing to get into freaky shit.

8+ start being snobbish, and 9s think they deserve Bradd Pitt and you should be just happy that they are allowing you to get close to their pussy.

>>737000429
My mom is fat, I didnt want to hit that.

Our relationship is weird now.

I'm a good looking guy who hangs with friends at a bar while we're all in our 30's so I turn down pussy multiple times a night.

I rarely turn down any decent offer but the shit I turn down is gross and no one should want it.

I turn down pussy all the time.

You have to pick your battles.

It's fun to ride the crazy train.

But if the damn train is already derailed it is best to avoid it.

>>737002645
You are an honest faggot.
You're okay in my book, anon

>>737000429

Only offered it up once. Old gf found out I was in town visiting friends. Sent me a message saying she hadn't fucked anyone since we broke up and that she wanted more. Even ponied up the cash for the hotel room.

I tore that ass up and came all over her tits. My one and only booty call. I'll always treasure that memory.

>>737003775
>I didn't want to wake up with a side order of 'accused rape' in the morning.

Happened to me. Except theres no alcohol involved

>>737002802

never met a teenage girl that could hygiene properly, especially one that just started getting periods

it's either apathy or ignorance but that shit is fucking gross

>>737000429
I was 17/M, she was about 28, going through a divorce, and was the cashier manager at the grocery store where I worked. I mostly stocked, but occasionally when it got busy they'd put me on a register. This particular night, she was counting down my till and kept teasing me that she was going to "take me home with her and wear me out." It led to some back and forth cutting up but I never for a moment thought she was serious, even when we were leaving and she made a joke about letting me drive. The next week, one of the other cashiers who was in college told me Maria (the head cashier) told her that she did everything to get me to get me in bed except kidnap me. I was like.. "She was serious?"
Disclaimer, this was 1980, before all the rampant sexuality between older women and teens. I had no idea a woman of 28 would actually want to fuck me, still feel stupid about it tho.

>>737000429
Just turned 16, fixed an entire garden for this man around 60, he was getting sick. His wife (from India) about 40 and smoking. Wanted to give me a little gift, drove me to a store and bought me a watch because I didn't want payment for helping a sick man out.
In the car going she had been talking a lot, family and stuff. Her hand kept creeping closer. On way back its on my crotch. Just massaging it, I still hate it today that I chickened out, also didn't want to be the homewrecker.
She didn't seem sure to go through with it either.
She was really good looking, blew many loads to her memory.
Gorgeous tits and well kept face and body.
Guess she just wanted a reason to leave or some side action.

>>737000429

I don't like roasties, automatic turn down.
I turn down chicks with STDs twice
I turned down a single mother

>>737009462
/this is pretty accurate.

I hate most of the 8+s. They just lay there and when you aren't fucking the get extremely bitchy.

>>737002431
Froggy Fresh? dat u?

>>737010030
Husband was sick, she had probably been without for a while. Would have been therapeutic for both of you.

A real man turns down free pussy all the time.

Here are some of the reasons I've turned down free pussy from different girls in the past:

1 - It's dripping. Remember folks, if it's dripping, it's not for dipping

2 - Likewise above, but with the smell of a rotting corpse

3 - I knew she had an STD

4 - She rated a 9 on the 'How likely is this girl to call the police for rape'

5 - Clearly had mental health issues and phoned me dozens of times a day

6 - Chased me down the street in her PJ's after I went to go home one day, a week after we'd just started dating (no sex), crying her eyes out and begging for me not to leave

7 - Had a dad that'd probably kill me

8 - Was underage

9 - Was drunk, pitifully so, and whilst she was busy making out with my shoulder, all I could do was hold her upright and keep trying to dance to 'Careless Whisper'

10 - Had made several passing references to wanting a baby with a man, any man

11 - Cock teased me to the point I hated her, and when she wanted it, I told her no just to spite her

12 - Met her in a nightclub, she was crying, I asked if she was okay, her friend had pulled and abandoned her, she was very drunk, I took her back to hers, she needed to vomit, I held her hair back for her and she turned round to kiss me, covered in vom. Put her to bed, she asked me to get in with her, I did, she told me she wanted sex, found out she was a virgin, told her no, this isn't what you want. Fell asleep, left in the morning before she woke

13 - Told me she didn't use condoms (pulled on a night out)

14 - Met her at a conference, went back to her hotel, but she did / didn't / did / didn't want to, I got bored and left, she text me an hour later telling me she wanted it, now, I told her no, I'm watching Hunt for Red October

15 - I had an STD

etc, etc, etc.

There are dozens of incidents where you'll knock back free pussy. Just because it's free, doesn't mean it's right for you.

>>737008323
You still around?

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Several times with this chick. She had a bf and I just liked someone else. I did her once tho

Pic related. Left

>>737000429
Work a late night shift at a 7/11 (student)
Group of hotties (20-24 yrs) walk in, going to a party to drink in for before hitting the street. They need slush ice (and a lot)! So they ask if they can get a special price or a lot of discount.
I say meehhhh not supposed to
They were drunk
I mention that there actually is a bit of discount
They don't really register that I guess.
THey buy a ton (Had to refill afterwards xD )
While Im typing in, they keep pushing for percentage off, I say, I wil see what I can do :p
I gave them just to normal saving the machine computes (maybe one free) but they bought a shitload.
One girl blurted she wanted to suck my dick due to the savings, I say thats kind but really not needed.
They leave and come back 2-3 hours later on their way downtown. 5-10 girls waiting outside, doors open. Same girl blurts out she needs to suck mah dick!
Nearly grabs and pulls me into the street.
Fack she was hot! She even wanted to come back and fuck me after my shift!
I said no thanks really politely (I also have a gf) and proffesional
We have a shitload of cams, knew my boss liked watching to see what we got up to and look for shoplifters.
Few days later shes in there again with some friends, shes kinda friendly but speaks short sentences, 2 weeks later she doesn't even want to know me xD
Women wtf!
Hapy I didn't cheat, but daaamnnnn it might have been an uprade (looks)
But never know, she might be crazy or otherwise lazy in bed because she knew she looked fine!

>>737010016
I've never encountered a girl with nasty pussy.
Not sure if you guys are hooking up with yeast infections of what, but the first girl I ever fucked was 15. Her pussy was always nice, no matter what time of day. Other girl I got with in HS was good too

>>737010703

Or she was the distraction whilst the rest turned your store over.

Dick.

Turned down once for me. Was a chick i was kinda into and she was fairly hot about a 7. small with big tits. She had quite the sex drive and was open about it to me. However she clearly hadnt showered that day from playing with herself the previous night/earlier. And it smelt so bad. had to turn her down but didnt have it in me to tell her why... was just to awkward to say haha.

>>737010461
Yeah I was a single teen then with a diamond 35 times a day.
She prob saw a bulge, she didn't mind me looking at her cleavage.
Looking back, I regret
Would have been a allright fair thing now many years afterwards. He was sick for a bout a year. lost contact with them years ago.

>>737010524
>>737009023
H

>>737010513
I back you up on those

>>737000429
I was Junior in high school and at the arcade with a male friend. This girl I've known since Jr. High comes up and starts getting real friendly, saying we can leave together and go anywhere, and do anything. The thing is, I knew her BF from Jr. High too, and they were on one of their many 'breaks." I figured they'd get back together and I'd be the asshole who swooped in a fucked her away from her true love. I had to call off like 10 times until she took no for an answer. Guess what? They never got back together, and looking back on the whole thing, I bet I hurt her feelings too. Should have just rough fucked her good. Fuck you Pete!

>>737010513

Hahaha, my man.

>>737000429
in a rush, to high to notice, to drunk do to shit, didnt shit so i got of the pot, my mom is giving me a ride and i dont own a cell /number.

>>737000429
Oh hell yes. Couple times been offered threesome. I'm not a fucking animal. Couple of women friends love me and want to suck my cock but that would screw up good relationships. Couple of gal pals have had the shit kicked out of them by life and offered up the tang but they would REALLY get hurt. Some have been fat...they can suck but I will not fuck, and Of course, like now, I'm in a fabulous relationship and 1. I don't want to fuck things up 2. I don't want to cheat 3. I don't want to hurt her. 4. Most importantly, I don't want to ME!

Relax, summer fags. I've had over 100 women. You don't have to everything that moves. You'll get laid one day, I guess. Shitard millenials

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>>737000429
>free pussy
How do I get it guys?

>>737010791
No because she genuinely wanted to give a bj and later. When my shift was over she was in the area of the shop and actually asked if I wanted to go back to her place and have a shower etc etc.
I smelled like pizza, a lot of pizza xD
They were just (danish) students having fun, not looking to rob something :p

>>737000429
It was stanky pussy

>>737000429
was too physically sick to have sex. Enflammed spleen

>>737000429
>8th grade
>Just transferred to new school
>really small Catholic school, everyone wears uniforms and is really serious about the religious stuff
>First week two girls who are friends try to become my friend. Talk to me a lot, always hang out at recess with me. Not sure why.
>Kinda glad someone wants to be my friend, though. Had a rough time at my previous school.
>Week 2, they start flirting with me a lot, getting braver each day
>By the last day of the week, they tell me they have a pool they go skinny dipping in together
>Tell me their parents will be gone that weekend
>Ask me to come over and go skinny dipping, mention we can "have fun" "playing" with each other afterwards inside the house
>Tell me they've been wanting a guy to "play" with and experiment with, but none of the super religious guys at school were good candidates. I came from public school, so I think they thought I was a bad boy or something.
>Tell them I'm down for it, letsdoit.jpg

That night after school
>Virginity kicks in
>So nervous, completely pussy out
>Literally never go back to school, had to transfer to a different school because I didn't know how to tell them I was too nervous and didn't want to look like a bitch
>Become a complete bitch in the process

MFW years later I realized I missed my chance at losing my virginity in a threesome with two 13 year old catholic school girls.

The only upside was I grew up a lot over the next year and lost my virginity when I turned 14. So it all worked out I guess.

>>737011098
You should've fucked her either way you screaming homo

My homecoming date was around 225-250 pounds and was about 2 minutes into the worst blowjob of my life after and I just called it quits, said I wasn't feeling well. She said if I stayed I could fuck her but I said I must have gotten food poisoning or something.

I don't think she believed me.

>>737000429
She was fat. And I can get better lays without much effort

>>737011542
Good GOD dude

I thought I was a faggot sometimes but that is next level, I'm legitimately impressed

Are you sure you're not literally gay?

im a gay little bitch and dont stick my dick in something that bleeds for a week. cause that shit is nasty

Is her name julieanne op?

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>>737004460
fucking bullshit, you are allowed to rape any non muslim women.

>>737011098
this hurts to read, partially because I probably would have done the same thing at that age (because I was a tremendous faggot). God damnit anon.

>>737011760
Your ass will bleed for a week after I stick my dick in it homo

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>>737005455
its possession of the right hand

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>nokotime

>>737000519
>she was 14
>didn't know until after we had hooked up
>she literally wanted me to come home with her, and meet her dad
>thought for a second about fucking her, then noped the fuck out
>changed cell
>burned social media links
>fuck can I go to prison for making out?

>>737011870
my spidey sense is tingling

>>737011805
>737011805
awwww, you're so sweet you kiss your uncle with that mouth?

>>737011889
no you can't, unless she was a good enough liar to convince the police it was forced making it sexual assault.

>>737011770
>Poland that low
It's because there is a social stigma for going to the police and/or reporting crimes in general.
If you're a man you're seen as a pussy for reporting something like this and not "enjoying free sex" instead (unless gay) and if you're a woman I'm preety sure you'd be beaten to death if they ever found out you reported it and they might want you to show up in court, cases can often last years so it's unnecessary stress.
t. Pollock

>>737010988
Nope, must be someone else anon.

>>737011765
No, not Julieanne.

>>737000429
There is no such thing as "Free Pussy". There is always going to be finance for the romance - whether at the beginning or at the end. Goes double for 'Free Unknown Pussy" like the photo likes to imply... most likely resulting in a visit to the clinic for some sort of VD.

>>737011734
27 now.

100% not gay. Only been with women, don't even like traps.

The weird thing is that I just felt really self conscious back then. Pretty sure it was just nerves since I was a virgin, coupled with an extremely low self esteem. The reason I transferred was because I had a lot of illness that the public school wouldn't accommodate at the time. Very skinny, public school kids bullied the shit out of me.

Like I said, a year later I grew up, got pussy + GF, started doing sports, eventually got into lifting, etc.

Hindsight is 20/20, but it's definitely a moment that I regret missing. Not sure what made me sperg out and not do it.

>>737011972
No but I kiss your uncle with it
Kiss him reaaaal slow

>>737011977
I was rolling on E man, all her friends were older ( 17/18 ) I didn't know she was the freshman :(

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>>737000429
On numerous occasions. At work, school and elsewhere.

I view their desir to have sex with me as being misguided, unhealthy and just plain foolish. I'm a loser in just about every way imaginable, and I care about others too much to let them make the mistake of having sex with me.

I'm a man of morals, I suppose. Also at this point I've committed myself to a life of permanent celibacy.

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>>737003118
not true. my first was a chubby and she was fuckin wild. great pussy too. that pussy tasted sweet ill tell ya that. All chubs are different just like skinny bitches

Once in a sort of sleep over thing where the girl insisted she sleep in my room.

Again in my teens when a girl was talking about a threesome, we slept in a little tent. She got pregnant and is still with the other guy about 10 years later so it's not so bad.

If I was bothered about getting more sex I'd go outside.

>>737012104
good for you, i hope that you two are happy together

>>737012231
Life was wasted on you, imagine how much better any one of the other 500,000 jizz that journeyed in to your mom's cooter would have lived it than you.

>started dating my first GF when we were both 16
>met at church
>went to bible study and youth group meetings and all that shit all the time
>she talked about nothing but jesus
>after about 6 months, she starts asking us to do things alone not with church people
>one night rent a movie and bring it back to my house
>parents are gone for the weekend
>half way through, she moves closer
>starts kissing me and grinding on my dick
>I really want to do it but I stop it
>"I thought you said we'd be virgins until marriage?"
>she blushes and mumbles something about not thinking I took it that seriously
>finish movie, take her home

a few weeks later she broke up with me and started dating a friend, and they definitely had a lot of sex that I could have been having. Honestly I thought it was a test and she'd realize I was the one or some stupid bullshit.

>>737011542
I feel for you man. If I were in that situation, I would have thought it was all some prank they were gonna do. I was so fucking insecure.

>in college
>go on date with hot as fuck gril, bit out of my league
>we are out eating and she whispers, I'm not wearing panties
>press my hand against her vag under the table
>my first thought is: oh this is why she is going out with me, she must be a diseased slut or something
>pet her pussy a bit, go back to making small talk, never call again

I was seriously fucked in the head. I have far too many stories of being actively hit on, and thinking they were either joking/fucking with me, or that there must be something wrong with them.

I guess I was pretty good looking, I just had no idea.

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>>737010513
>1 - It's dripping. Remember folks, if it's dripping, it's not for dipping

>>737012344
Yeah we are, reeeeaaaaal happy together.
Wedding is in November

Your uncle asked me to invite you to sit front row at the ceremony.

We can't wait to see you at our special day, you fucking homo.

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>no
>because of family

>>737012395
Not a waste at all. I'm perfectly happy this way.

The only way to really waste your life is to not live it the way you want to.

>>737002733
Lol, are you scared your dad will kick your ass for getting some pussy?

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>>737012231
Tips fedora
>you faggot i bet every single one had you as last resort before stooping to niggers.
>do you even realize what you do to a womens self confidence being turned down , by you

>>737000429

Yeah, I was 17 she was 12 (almost 13). She begged me to take her virginity but I was too scared that someone would find out and I'd be busted for statutory rape, or her Dad would kill me. Looking back I regret I didn't do it. Mfw I'll never have a chance to fuck a 12 yo again. Feels bad man.

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>>737012544
Get out of my country you nigger

>>737002944
>implying that girl was not the FBI

>>737012430

Yeah that rule is bullshit. Enjoy your dry cunts.

At a party this girl kept bringing guys into this room, she must have fucked 6 or 7 guys before coming up to me. We go in the room, she slips off her skirt, gets in the fucking position, and i look at her pussy and its overflowing with cum. I was grossed out but still hard as a rock, so i pull out a condom, and she says fuck no. I told her theres no way im fucking raw, after youve fucked that many guys. So i left the room and she ran out and screamed youre just fucking homo anyways.

>be 24, still a virgin in grad school
>hang out a lot with a group of friends in one of my classes
>get along especially well with the only hot girl in the class
>we text for a while, we are getting closer
>one night, she calls at 1130pm asking if I want to come over and play some board games
>I say sure, head over
>she takes me into the bedroom and closes the door
>asks what I want to do
>"where's the games?"
>she looks at me like she's wondering if I'm joking
>realizes I wasn't, goes and gets some
>we play fucking monopoly for an hour and a half
>I kick her ass, naturally
>afterward I'm sitting on her bed, she sits down right up against me
>puts hand on my thigh
>"so, what do you want to do now?"
>"oh, I don't know, the weather's nice, want to take a walk?"
>we fucking do that
>get back, she seems annoyed
>gets a sleeping bag out, tells me goodnight
>i leave the next morning

I have no excuses. I am not a virgin anymore fortunately, but every time I think about that night I want to kill myself.

>>737012647
I don't know or care if I was their first or last choice. Most of them were good-looking though.

I wouldn't be able to live with myself had I done anything with them. The blow to their self-esteem would have been much worse.

>>737012688
>>737012688
yeah that is more like child molest, you'd have been fucked.

>>737010513
Good man!

>>737012688
When i was 28 i went to sleep with a 15yr old. She didnt tell me she was a virgin. The minute i stuck it in her i knew, and immediately felt bad. I went soft out of guilt. She spent the next 20 minutes sucking my limp dick trying to get it hard because she wanted to fuck that bad.

>>737013102
that's just fucking sad. Risking prison and you didn't even get off.

>>737000429
Twice.

>Trying to date two girls
>One just strings me along, the other goes for it
>The one stringing me along gets jealous my attention is now elsewhere
>Comes over about ten minutes before new gf is supposed to arrive
>She knows this
>Suddenly she's naked on all fours ion my bed
>Not enough time to finish anything I'd start, and would definitely fuck things up with new gf
>Instead of fucking her I give her a spanking and tell her to put her clothes on and GTFO

And one other time later in life (I'm old):
>Son is over with his gf
>Drinks with dinner so they're staying over
>Wife gone to bed
>Son and gf gone to bed
>In kitchen having a nightcap and running the dishwasher
>Son's gf walks in wearing nothing but a thong
>She grabs my crotch
>This is wrong on too many levels
>I know wife is still awake in bed, and son might be as well
>But there's a solid 8/10 girl nearly half my age with her hand on my crotch
>Kiss her and she does that heartbreakingly cute thing of kicking one leg up during the kiss
>Fuck, this is real
>Tell her she's gorgeous, I'm flattered, but this can't happen
>She pouts
>Tell her to put her clothes on and we'll share a cigarette outside
>She does
>While smoking get text from wife asking when I'm coming to bed
>Tell her I'll be there in a minute
>Crisis averted
>

>>737000429
All the time OP

There is a difference between dickDonalds and the cheesecake factory and making your own organic food

Optimal food for optimal health
Optimal pussy for optimal health

>>737000429
She had aids and I didn't want to get aids.

>>737000429
Only once.

She was short, fat and smelled like bad decisions.

>>737013211
by "make your own organic food" in this analogy are you trying to say you fuck the kids you made?

>>737000429
nice pusy

>>737010513
>11 - Cock teased me to the point I hated her, and when she wanted it, I told her no just to spite her

oh shit man. I was friendzoned by this chick who would literally ask me if I liked the panties she was wearing out that night ( and then show me ) . after a while I was like "fuck off". . one night we were all hanging out naked in the hot tub, and she started hitting on my for real. I ignored her. She rubbed her shaved pussy against me, and I was like "nah".

Then she looked at me, sort of scowled / sneered, You know what your problem is? You don't know how to recognize an opportunity when you see one.,

>she was right

I mean in a larger, life sense. I had let a lot of great opportunities go by for stupid reasons.

I was so fucking filled with rage that second I bent her over and started rough fucking her on the edge of the hot tub.

We finished fucking upstairs.

Next day: she basically is bored with me and we never fuck again.

So yeah, you can see how easily I was manipulated. feelsbadman

>>737013147
I ended up fucking her a few months later, but as soon as i came i felt like the worlds worst person

>>737013190
well played. would have fucked up your life.

>>737012816

Enjoy your STD riddled, dripping pussy.

I'm not talking about girls that squirt. I'm talking about girls that are dripping pussy fluid because they've got Chlamydia or Syph.

>>737012943

Yes, I can understand that.

>Taking an hour and a half to wipe out the only other play in Monopoly.

Kill yourself.

>>737000429
my roommate had a chick and another dude over and were taking turns on her. my roommate is pretty nasty and she knocked on my door naked with said roommate seeing if i wanted to join and i said nah. there could be a number of reasons why i turned the oppurtunity down but im sticking with they were both nasty people.

>>737013319
The dubs of truth

Organic, non gmo is the way to go

>>737013427
Absolutely, but doing the right thing never sucked so much in a single moment. Saying no to a beautiful girl half your age fucking sucks.

>>737013514
she kept stopping to talk until i reminded her it's her god damn turn. It could have been over much faster than that.

Yes bc she was fat. Not chubby, fat, really fucking fat.

Even free pussy has it's limits

>>737013673

>it could've been over much faster than that

Not as fast as your chances of getting her to sleep with you after that night!

I have literally never turned down a pussy in my life, no STDs, nothing wrong. Have had 54 partners.

>>737000429
Yes, once. Because considering the source I was 90% certain an STD was impending and I didn't have a condom handy (was at work, on shift).

>>737013929
I realize now I kind of ruined her night. It'd be like calling for a pizza and the delivery guy shows up empty handed and just wants to hang out all night and you're too polite to tell them to fuck off.

If I had a time machine I'd go back and tell my idiot self that fucking nobody calls someone of the opposite sex at 1130 at night because they actually want to play board games with you in their bedroom. Then I'd shoot both versions of myself.

>>737013439
i can never tell as all women are dripping wet before i even get their pants of

i was sitting on a bench 5 am on a train station...
i was 16 years old at the time and this lady that is 32 came over to me beggin me for sex and beggin me for her to suck my cock while touching me near my dick while kissing me on my cheeck, i quickly refused her because i got shit scared

>>737003160
Once a cheater always a cheater you idiot and there is no worse a cheater than a military spouse cheater.

>>737012430
Definitely not piss

>>737000429
yes
why?
she had herpies
also, i was married, but thats beside the point

She was hot, batshit crazy, a drama queen and she works for me. An EEO complaint waiting. She was pissed about me turning her down and wanted to make trouble about THAT....so I showed her all the saved screencaps of me explaining why I could not fuck her, thanks for begging....how i would love to read these aloud at some hearing.....she shut up fast.

>>737014143
Did she at least have other board games available?

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>>737000429
>be 15
>older sister comes home drunk from a party
>Im playing WOW
>She tries to flirt with me
>pulls her tits out
>Tell her to p...p...please go
>regret it forever

She doesn't even remember.

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Turned down the last 6 chics that begged to fuck. All pretty hot. I prefer being on my knees with a fat cock in my mouth.

>>737014334
yeah a few, i just really wanted to play monopoly at the time.

>>737000429
she was a slut and had no tits. also she put finger in throat after eating to be skinny and that was a huge downer.

>mfw to this day im a virgin

>>737014342
Sister hot? Pics?

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>>737014523

>the one in white

This happened years ago.

>>737014342
you would have regretted it even more if you had actually done it. Not remembering pulling your tits out is one thing, but getting railed by your brother and waking up next to him would definitely stick in her mind and probably result in a rape charge for you.

>>737014608
would fill with cum

>>737014633
I dont know I have had like a decade to think about this and, as she is now a mid twenties skank I think I should have when I had the chance.

>>737014523
>>737014608
>>737014729
stop samefagging

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Fat chicks all the time..

"Pussy is Pussy" is the I'm fucking ugly, fat or both and can't get anything else talk to cushion the pain.

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>>737014769
IM not same fagging you utter retard.

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>>737014769
kys faggot, suck on these dubs

>>737003685
Fuck, mate. I don't know how to feel about this.

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>>737014769
Literally not

>>737014608
https://thebarchive.com/b/thread/696793406
ok faggot

>>737000429

My ex for example.

At a festival with a group of friends and she just comes up to me saying she misses me and that she wants to take me home. Leave my friends now because she wants me. This bitch had left me because she needed "a change" or something three months earlier.

I threw my head back, laughed and fucked someone else that night.

>>737000429
one time i didn't have a condom and i was 17 so i didn't understand pulling out.

one time her pussy was hairy and i was too drunk to want to go any further. we just slept naked together lol

I've got one more. Don't know if it really counts because I kind of cut it off before sex was actually an offer, but I'll share anyways:

>Niece is visiting
>We've been close since she was a little girl
>Wife out of town for one night of her visit
>I think nothing of it
>Have dinner with niece
>Let her have two glasses of wine even though she's underage because I'm an indulgent uncle
>Suddenly she asks about the aesthetics of genitals
>Laugh and say aesthetics are rarely the strong point of them
>Tell her what she sees in porn is probably better aesthetically than most of what she'll see in real life
>She's unsure about the look of hers
>Holy shit, I can see where this is going
>My neice is fumbling to come up with a reason to show me her snatch
>There's no way that would end well
>She's pretty and I love her, but she's my sister's daughter
>But I know myself, too
>If I'm in the position of snatch inspector it's going to involve my tongue, and that shit can't happen
>Ask her if everything works down there
>She says yes
>Tell her she has no problem then
>Another crisis averted

>>737014608
Dude she is banging. She looks like Anna Kendrick.

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>>737015384
GOD DAMIT MAN

cant an anon just use pictures of his EX's to make incest fantasies.

What is your problem. Thank you for ruining my roleplay.

God damn killjoys on /B/ always fucking up my fapping.

Congratulations you caught me, she is actually just a girl I used to fuck. Still hotter than any girl your shriveled sperg cock will ever touch.

I simply loved her.

>>737015894
>lying on the internet so guys will masturbate to your stories

You might be gay

>>737016174
I MASTURBATE TO MY OWN STORIES AND USE /b/ so its a collaborative experience.

nigger did you look at that archive

https://thebarchive.com/b/thread/696793406

Look at those girls I banged last year. Im not gay

>>737000429
Twice.
Once because crazy(would probably bite off my dick or something), once because possible STD's.

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>>737016338
>Once because crazy(would probably bite off my dick or something)
25 year old virgin with no standards, where do you find those?

>>737015894
>she is actually just a girl I used to fuck
> I used to fuck
You lied to us ones, we would be fools to listen to you twice

>>737000429
Because she was annoying as fuck.

>>737000429
I have a few times. I'm tall, fit, not bad looking a be am great at faking confidence but despite what my friends think I'm a 27 year old virgin who spergs out whenever I get a chance for sex. My female friends think I won't touch them because I met them all through them having dated/being related to other friends, one of them is openly in love with the guy she thinks I am

>>737000429
She was a 3/10