Hey /b/ I just got a couch from the side of the road and found

>>735661139
it's a din du. burn it.

Stick in garage outside they will die in a few days and use bedbug spray . Don't leave in house they will spread everywhere .

Concierge here. That's a male bedbug. Might wanna talk to an exterminator.

LIGHT THE DAMN THING ON FIRE!
Also the bleach will deteriorate the fabrics and completely RUIN your nice blanket.

Gross... seriously OP?

>>735661139

You are totally fucked if you already brought it inside. Those fuckers never go away.

>>735661385
this. Do not put it in your house, put it in a shed or outside under a tarp and let it get really hot for a few days. Call an exterminator though, because bedbugs are fucking bad.

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>>735661139
You fucking IDIOT. Heat and Pyrethrins are your ONLY hope. I'm not trolling or being hyperbolic. I've deleted with these fuckers. THAT IS a bed bug. Buy Diatomaceous earth, cover the fucking couch until it looks like a powdered donut inside and out. Go over the seams with a heat gun that gets to HUNDREDS of degrees. You've doomed your entire house, fuckface!

Op here

Well shit, I can't really go dragging it out cause it's 11:57 and everyone in my house is asleep.

Looks like I burn my house down.

>>735661139
OP you should have keep it outside for while
clean it , and make sure you vacum it
also bag bed are extremly weak to heat

>>735661139
>Picking up random people's old trash furniture
I guess you get what you deserve.

>>735661139
definitely a bedbug. immediately bin the couch and pray to satan they didnt crawl out and infest other things (protip: they did). a bedbug can live for 5 months without eating. call a fucking exterminator, or rig your house to heat up to over 120 degrees for a couple of hours. bedbugs are assholes and hard to kill, unless you use heat.

>>735661139
Take the couch outside, fool your neighbor into taking it. Once you get bed bugs or carpet beetles, you will never get rid of them. Don't let those fucking things in your house.

>>735661578
One time when I was younger we had to throw away our beds and get new ones because of these little shits (We lived in an apartment at the time, so no way for us to really generate heat).

>>735661799
Bullshit. Heatguns are $20.

Dude bedbugs can dig in and you can spray pesticides all day and they wont die, you are fucked if they are in your house, the only way to kill them is starve them of blood by bedbug proofing your bed and doing some other hardcore living modifications, way to go faggot

>>735661891
Fuck, I wish I would have thought of that earlier during that time.

>>735661635

Nuke the site from orbit. Only way to be sure.

>>735661910
This isn't true. Diatomaceous earth, heat guns and bait/trap methods are all highly effective.

steam cleaners work to an extent

>>735661675
Broke fag here. I've done the same thing multiple times, but I leave it in direct sunlight for several hours and vacuum and clean the shot out of it.

I've never just dragged a side of the road find straight into my fucking house though. That's Bobbys jerk off couch.

Op here

The only thing in my room is a metric fuckton of blanket and laundry with some electronics.

I can't so anything right now so what are my risks of spread if I leave it tonight and fuckin high heat dryer everything tomorrow.

Also, do you guys want a pic of the couch?

>>735661139
https://strawpoll.com/r6zdwr6

>>735662078
No lie, huge fucking risk. You need to deal with it immediately. Tell me you don't have fucking carpet? Do you see what looks like miniature rice grains on/in it?

>>735662010
enjoy lung disease from the silica powder

>>735661139
these people are over reacting, you can get rid of them reasonably easily
>>735662010
this guy is on the right path
>>735662078
you are going to have to literally wash and dry on super high temp all of the linens in your room, ALL OF THE LINENS

>>735661139
Get it out of your house ASAP and burn that shit. My dad had bugs, and despite all of his efforts, he could not get rid of them

>>735661139
Remove it from your home and burn it. Burn it with thermite. Then clean every inch of your home it came in contact with using clorox. Then clean every inch of yourself. Finally start praying to every God you can think of that none of those little fucks survived.

>>735662078
All it takes is one female to suck your blood and have sex with a male. Females will lay like 10 eggs a day for a few months off one feeding.

>>735662078
Also, REMOVE ALL THE FUCKING FABRICS FROM BEING NEAR IT, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!

>>735661635
What state are you in?

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>>735661139
Ha. Good luck. Ggwp

get the couch out of there man, bedbugs will be on the move when you sleep

How fucking stupid is this guy? I couldn't imagine touching a roadside couch, but bringing it into my home to use it? Jesus. This is absolutely disgusting.

>>735661139
i had this shit for like 2 years burn that shit. they die from heat so if you have a heater or something that'll do if not though burn the couch and anything near it

>>735662292
set it on fire in the street like a proper human

Op here

I'm in Illinois. The couch is from a reasonably good neighborhood and it wasn't my idea to put it in my room, it was my father's. I asked to check and he said "It's fine, I know what I'm doing"

All linens except for cover blanket are removed.

You are fucked if you don't get it out now. My college apartment got bed bugs. I had to trash everything

>>735662411
Good, but you didn't answer my question. IS IT ON CARPET!?

Op here again

Can't trash it at all at the moment. Fuckin everyone is asleep and if I cause a ruckus I will be in more hot water than a boiling crab.

Op again woo

Small but of carpet but mostly hard tile.

>>735661635
You will regret every second that couch is in your house. The people in the apartment above ours were filthy and invited in bedbugs, we wound up moving out after trashing a whole bed and god knows how long with the exterminator fuming the place. a year later they redid the whole building, tore it right apart

we found a dead one in the bottom of a bag of clothes when we moved into our new house and panicked for a month but it never happened again

bedbugs are so goddamn bad

>>735662549
Then you're fucked.

I had my place heat treated they even brought dogs in to sniff them out even after going through all of that everything I owned had to be trashed.. TV's computers all furniture

>>735662549
Answer me quickly, OP! I've successfully rid a couch of bed bugs, BUT YOU HAVE TO DO WHAT I SAY. SERIOUSLY. IS IT ON CARPET!?

>>735661635
Dude, if you wake people and tell them why, they'll be wide-eyed and pumped to help you in seconds. If not, they're stupid and you'll all be miserable until you come to your senses and have to get professional help in a couple of months. Get it out of there!!!!!!

>>735662486
they're a hearty parasite, the eggs can survive a lot of torture. You should get a steamer and and clean every fabric or shaggy surface. Start checking for the regularly, they hate light

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>>735662062
>broke fag
>will now have to pay 100s in exterminator bills.

and you fucking poors wonder why. Its not just that you make a single stupid mistake, your kind is a litany of stupid choices.

>>735662667
We did this. There's a science though, which I wish to share with OP.

>>735661635
Fuck it man wake the whole goddamn house up and get that shit outside

>>735662217
and then you get that handful of eggs that fucking survive everything you throw at them to begin the cycle anew.

Seriously get it out now. I'm not fucking with you

>>735661601
>>735661891
>>735662010
>>735662153
These are all me, OP. Do you have tape? I want to give you a very specific regimen to take care of this, but I have to know you're paying attention. Not gonna waste my time.

Op here

I do but does it have to be a certain kind?

I have duct tape

>>735661799
>>735661578
>>735661385
They can last several months without feeding

Like I said. Had my place heat treated twice. Brought in the special dogs, spared no expense trying to get rid of them and still had to get rid of everything I owned

had bedbugs before, that's definitely a bed bug.

Dude, heed my warning. Deal with them ASAP before everything in your house gets ruined. This problem multiplies with time.

>>735663051
Duct tape is fine. Ok. Make a circle of the tape that fits around your hand. Open every seam in the couch SLOWLY and slam the tape on any bug you find. Do the same to anything that looks like a rice grains. Go over EVERY FUCKING INCH. Use multiple pieces of tape if necessary. Put used tape in a Ziploc bag, then put THAT bag in a Ziploc bag upside down so the openings are away from each other. This is step 1.

>>735662738
the amount of people who come to me and say that thy broke their own $800 phone by throwing it when they got mad... christfuck the gene pool has one hell of a shallow end

Op here

If I leave a light on will that help them not spreading, I read they were more nocturnal

>>735663281
They will give 0 fucks about a light. Do my tape thing. NOW. I've had the fuckers crawl into my hand in a well lit room mid day. It depends entirely on how hungry they are.

LOL

you are SO fucked if you really brought that shit into your house. literally consider moving.

those fuckers live up to like 400 days. the bites they gives itch like a mother fucker for weeks and they bite multiple times. they lay eggs, constantly, like a dozen a day, every fucking day.

They are smart too. They will seek shelter until 80% of their body is touching something, meaning they hide in the tiniest of cracks. They hide in your carpet. In your bed. In your couch. In your fucking wall through the electrical outlet. EVERYWHERE. They will climb your fucking wall and onto the ceiling and then drop down onto your bed while you are sleeping if you try to block your bedposts.

THEY ARE RELENTLESS. Think you got them all? Think again mother fucker. You missed an egg and now the infestation starts again a month later when you finally let your guard down. They are they hardest pest to kill. Some exterminators will recommend you just give up and move if you are in an apartment building or even an area where they infest. They will dip out of your house, go next door to escape the exterminator, and come back when they try to exterminate them over there.

Its already too late. You are SO SO SO fucked. You dont even know it yet but you just unleashed a living fucking hell on yourself. I would rather have fucking satanic ghosts haunting my house than that shit.

get that fucking couch outside and far away and go fucking defcon one, NOW. Even if you do absolutely everything in your power, THIS VERY SECOND, you probably wont succeed. If you wait til tomorrow then GG your house is totally fucked m8

>>735661139
Ive lived in a homeless shelter once. And can confirm thats a bed bug. AND YOUR TOTALLY FUCKED. Those things can live for a year wih out feeding. And when they do feed they will bite the fuck out of you.

Also you might as well call in sick to work, dont get in your car etc... untill you kill them all. Or everyone you know will hate you for ever if they speard. And trust me they will, amd like a wild fire.

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Hahahahahahhahahahhah
You fucking idiot. If you don't get that shitty couch out of there right now, you will never have a night of rest again.

Then burn the couch, vacuum the fuck out of everything, burn your house down, and burn yourself. Yes, it really is that bad.

are you fucking serious? LOL be ready for years of cleaning all your shit every few days.

>>735661139
First off, you're retarded for taking a random couch from outside into your home. Yes, those are bedbugs. Leaving it outside or in your garage won't do anything, they can live at least 6 months without food. Your whole house has bed bugs already even if it was only there for a day. Toss it out to minimize the infestation and get an exterminator. You fucked up real hard.

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HAHHAHHHAHHAHAHAHAA

>You're fucked.

Yeah you think the people will be more pissed that you woke them or when they have to trash everything they own

OP, your dad is a fucking idiot. Get that couch out NOW.

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>>735662549
So... your family would rather deal with a possibly long, drawn-out war with these little fuckers, than having their sleep disturbed?

Op here

https://strawpoll.com/w6dr55f

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>>735663281
>will that help them not spreading
dude you're beyond help; just burn that fucking couch and all the fabrics that were in contact with the nest; if you have a rug and the couch was on the it, well, we have you bad news; you will have to burn the rug also.
when you're done with the fire phase, prepare to clean you nasty house like you had never do it; just walk backwards on the path that you follow inside your house and clean that area. Look on google how to do it rigth.
And finally, you and your father are a stupid inbred waste of human genes. Do us a favor and kill yourself and your stupid dumbass father in the fire.

>>735663560
An exterminator can clear a house of bed bugs right ?

Heat the entire inside of your house to 90F OR ABOVE for 24 hours. It has to be 90F OR ABOVE FOR 24 HOURS.

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R.I.P. OP

eucalyptus + tea tree + lavendar essential oils. Mix those three into a water bottle with distilled water. More tea tree than everything else. The amount you want to put in is super strong.

Drench everything with that. The combination of those three suffocates insects.

>>735661139
Yeeeeeeah.... You are fucked. I had bed bugs once because my roommate at the got a couch from Craigslist and it had some in there. It was the worst time of my life, the only thing that killed them was the fact that we had no air conditioning and when summer came along (I live in Houston Texas, so it gets hot as fuck here) and killed them all from the extreme heat

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HERES A CARTOON TO HELP YOU DEAL WITH INFESTATIONS OF BEDS ON THE BUG YOU SLEEP ON OP

>>735664106
More like 120F if I remember right

You all sound like a bunch of baboons trying to pick bugs off each other. The fucking OP is clearly not bright enough to grasp the seriousness of the shit he is in. There ain't nothing you can do to fix stupid. Move along.

>>735664106
No, idiot, the eggs survive up to 130ish like the other guy said. THIS IS WHY IVE BEEN SCREAMING HEATGUN, but the OP went fucking radio silent. I can only hope he's doing my tape suggestion.

you are FUCKED

just when you think you got them all


BAM a whole other side of the fucking house is infested.

>>735664234
Its 90F, not trying to argue, was a warehouse manager and had to deal with these fuckers, exterminator told me 90F

My ex gf had bed bugs and didn't tell me for half a year. Last month I was suspicious but couldn't find any. One day I woke up and had bites everywhere. Flipped my mattress, there they were. I got rid of EVERYTHING. I'm sleeping on an air mattress. Or laying anyways because now I don't sleep, eveerrryy little itch I get I freak out. I can look at my leg and literally feel something crawling on it and it's not even there. Op you have to get that couch out. I wouldn't wish this shit on anyone. I don't know how long you've had it in there but you're probably already screwed.

>>735664100
Not likely. They're highly pesticide resistant, which is pretty much all exterminators do.

If I had to choose between chopping my dick and balls of or have one bed bug placed in my room some where randomly. Id fucking cut my dick a balls off.

You are so fucked, so very fucked. FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED

>>735664303
Yeah but we can still laugh about it.

your life is fucking over lmfao bed bugs are a fucking nightmare. i dealt with them once while traveling and my shit itched for like 2 weeks. Fucking itched so bad i scratched til i bled.

Any time i stay somewhere new, i check my sleeping arrangements for signs of bedbugs. If i go to someones house for the first time, and i see they got all sorts of bug bites, i am NOT fucking staying there. All it takes is one little fucker to hide in your shit and get into your house and YOU ARE COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY FUCKED. Last time i stayed somewhere that had bedbugs i demanded a refund and got the fuck out of there. I brought all my shit to the laundromat and scoured my bag for the entire time it took for my shit to clean, just to be sure nothing made it in.

If you brought a fucking couch thats infested with them into your house, consider yourself boned bro. I 100% guarantee they migrated into your home already. If you get the exterminator now ( AND GET THAT FUCKING SHIT OUTSIDE RIGHT FUCKING NOW YOU DUMB FUCK ) then maybe you can stop them before they become a full blown infestation.

Treat this shit like a house fire. Would you worry about waking your parents up if your house was on fire? Fuck no. They wouldnt give a fuck about you being awake - they would treat the situation seriously. This is literally the same level of seriousness. You are going to be in a living hell for months if not years if you dont start taking action NOW.

People legit move over this. Im not joking. Roaches are a fucking blessing compared to bedbugs.

>>735664213
This will do less than nothing, you moron. Don't do this hippy bullshit, OP.

Diatomaceous earth

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>>735664097

>>735664100
Yes, but you have to do work too. You'll have to do shit like wash all your clothes in hot water then stick them in the dryer for an hour, bag them until they spray the house. They usually spray once then again 2 weeks later, so you'll be living out of bags for the next month most likely. Not only are bed bugs costly but they're extremely difficult to get rid of. Sometimes they can even survive through the second spray.

>>735664456
Exterminators usually take a bed bug as a sample and test different sprays on them. Not all bed bugs die to the same shit, sadly.

Op here

Going to talk to mother about moving the couch now. I'm gonna try and take the cosmic beat down.

>>735664644
Me and my wife got rid of ours, but you have to be fucking diligent and do several VERY specific steps.

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>>735664521

forgot pick. the amount of bites you can expect from a typical bedbug infestation.

TYPICAL. INFESTATION.

YOU JUST BROUGHT A MEGA INFESTATION INTO YOUR HOUSE WILLINGLY YOU MIGHT AS WELL SUMMONED FUCKING SATAN ONTO THE MORTAL PLANE TO BE YOUR FUCKING ROOMMATE

Your house is now A LIVING HELL
CALL ISIS TO BOMB YOUR HOUSE

>>735664855
Tell me about it, I lived with the fuckers for 3 god damn years. They just kept coming back, sprayed the house about 8 times until they were gone for good. Had to buy new clothes because the intense dryer heat just straight fucked all my old ones.

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>>735664814
Just push it outside yourself you lazy fuck, or are you seriously that much of a Nancy boy you need mom to do your heavy lifting.

FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED
FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED
FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED
FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED
FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKEDFUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUCKED FUC

OP take timestamped pic of the couch and get some bedbugs/bedbug eggs in the pic too if you are feeling generous. I want to see the piece of junk couch you just destroyed your family's lives over.

>>735661139
>Dad said it's alright
Dude. You're fucked, man.
Those termites are going to haunt your waking hours and your dreams until you exterminate them.
They spread fucking fast.

>>735665086
I'm pretty sure he's taking it himself, he just doesn't want her pissed off dragging the thing out at midnight.

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OP, my grandmother showed me how to get rid of bed bugs. We buried an oil drum, and hinged the lid. Then we wired bloody bed parts to the lid as bait. The bed bugs come for the bloody bed part, and... They fall into the drum, and after a month, you've trapped all the bed bugs. But what did you do then? Throw the drum into the ocean? Burn it? No. You just leave it. And they begin to get hungry, then one by one... They start eating each other, until there are only two left. The two survivors. And then what - do you kill them? No. You take them, and release them into your beds. Only now, they don't eat you anymore. Now they will only eat bed bug. You have changed their nature.

>>735661139
those are bed bugs, your house is ruined forever grats

>>735665244
Kek.

>>735665244
If only. You would only have two that eat their own kind. Once they ley eggs, it will start all over.

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>>735665244

Incredible.

OP i can promise you youd rather wake up the entire neighborhood than deal with these fuckaroos, get that shit outside in a garage or something, at the very LEAST. you should also get a heat gun and just go to town on the damn thing.

and for fucks sake if you have pets check them thoroughly as fuck, ears in particular.

90% Rubbing alcohol in a spray bottle, or 120 proof vodka can kill them, I work as an in-home tard guard and the fucker I have to watch drug them home from a special Olympics trip he was on, exterminator don't do shit the company I work for has been paying to get his place sprayed for them since last july and they still come back, so I'm literally going as far as wearing a coat of deepwoods OFF repellent and spraying my clothes down with raid before going into work with the spud, I live next door to my dad so I leave clothes in his garage to change into after work before going into my house then I take the clothes I wore to work and let them sit in a bucket of sevendust for a few hours before washing it, fucking lucky that there's no sign I've brought them home, my methods sound a bit extreme but I'm still paying off my house and I'll be damned if I'm gonna drag those fuckers in

welp sounds like its time to start looking for a new house and new furniture and new cloths and new everything because everything you own now is officially FUCKED

Am I gonna be the only person to point out this is obvious bait? There is no way OP would be so casual about this if this was actually legit.

>>735661635
drop a mixtape in a bathtub of gasoline with a toaster plugged into an outlet inside

>>735665783

many people dont understand what a bedbug is. They just know the nursery rhyme that mothers sing to little babies when tucking them in at night. It seems innocent. They might not even be real and just be made up for the song.

WRONG. They are the devil in insect form. OP does not grasp the gravity of the situation he is in.

I think OP is telling the truth and he fucking doomed his whole street with that fucking aids couch.

>>735665760
But shit, the couch was free. You can't pass up a deal like that.

>>735665188

this. OP needs to start delivering with timestamps so we can have more threads in the coming weeks with him describing to us how fucked his life is now that he voluntarily introduced bedbugs into it.

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>>735665783
Seriously, how did we have 114 posts, with no time stamp provided, before someone pointed this out.

>>735666087
This. Holy shit. I didn't know how fucking satanic these things were until I encountered them myself.
The devil can't even begin to comprehend the biblical evil that bedbugs are.

I had seriously lucked out in the bedbug front. I had fallen asleep on the couch and one was on my chest. I grabbed and squeezed and killed it.

For the next few months I was fucking diligent. I sprayed 91% alcohol all-over everything. It's now been 4 months since I killed that one on me and no others spotted anywhere.

I lucked the fuck out.

>>735665783
It could be. If it is, then 10/10 OP. But this is no laughing matter. I would join the military if we could storm ship trooper these fuckers. ISIS would say I was to extreme.

>>735666087
He'll learn. In a week he'll be wishing he listened. In 2 weeks he'll wish he was dead.

Then his impoverished family will be wishing they lived in a box.

Kek this thread is the best one tonite.

>>735666266
Hate to tell you but you might still have them, the bites don't affect everyone the same and they're extremely difficult to spot unless you have a serious infestation which can take 1-2 years depending on how large your house is. You're most likely fine, but I will pray for you, /b/rother.

>>735666266
They're still there, plotting their revenge.

that is a bed bug and its too late they are already in your house only thing now is to soak the couch down with alcohol as in the rubbing kind and call an exterminator ASAP this "free" couch just cost you alot of money

the people telling you they will die in a few days are idiots they can last a fucking year or longer without feeding

oh and that one just fed not long ago so expect at least one itchy bite if not many more they appear in lines

>>735666460
Honestly the best thread I've seen in awhile.

Feelsgood to laugh on /b/ again.

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The results are in, OP

General question not OP. Since they Drink blood, if I just leave and not enter my house for a long time will they all die out?

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>>735665783
Yes he can if he's a NEET.

Also not everyone understands this type of thing. Mostly because it's not prevalent like Ariana GrandeCunt.

I do hope it's true in diamonds hoping its true. The suffering will be unbearable.

my sides

Every second you waste OP you're straying further from hope, ACT FAST

>>735666473
Never got a bite and check everywhere regularly. I get a bad reaction from mosquito bites so I'd know if I was getting bit.

>>735666551
>>735666473

They are known to be go dormant and live up past 400 days. They lay eggs, every single day, forever. They are incredibly difficult to get rid of. Probably the only pest where calling in an exterminator is worthwhile. Even roaches are tame to this shit.

>>735661891
and arson is 25 to life in most states if you fuck up

>>735666665

sextuplet 6's

and you miss them by 1

>>735666757
Means nothing.

Takes 3 weeks to even react to scabies.

It'll all make sense when you develop memory cells and your immune system doesn't like it anymore.

>>735666706
Yeah leave for a year plus. Maybe two just to be safe.

>>735666706

Hypothetically yes. It will literally take a year or two for this to happen, supposing none escape to your neighbors house and there are zero food sources. Even a single mouse will allow them to breed and restart the entire cycle from scratch.

>tfw brought in some random couch from outside two or so years ago
feels good not living in america?
maybe it's your punishment for slaughtering the natives or something?

>>735666941
>>735666997
Well I'd still 'live at my house' somewhat. I'm thinking I'd just sleep on the front porch because I have a hammock.

>>735666841
The judge will understand. Its bed bug, burn the whole town down if you have to.

>>735667014
is our punishment for banning DDT outright instead of just banning farmers from using it

>>735661139
burn the whole house down, then irradiate the ashes.

>>735667072
they can literally infest dreadlocks a hammock will house them very comfortably

I'm pest control fag here.
Heat. If you live somewhere hot make that couch as hot as possible. If you can find it online buy "Bedlam" and soak those fuckers. Adult bedbugs can go a year without feeding, although hatchlings MUST feed between every molting process or else they'll die, shitty thing is they molt 9 times. If it doesn't spread that'll take care of them, otherwise you're gunna have to call a pest control company

>>735667119
I wonder if you can import? It would be worth any charges if you got caught.

>>735666895
fuck.

Bed bugs are legitimately the worst thing I ever had to deal with when I was living at home. My parents didn't give a fuck, and the home remedies only helped for a week or two at a time. The physical shit is annoying and you'll eventually get used to it, but the emotional scarring they leave never really goes away. I've not dealt with a bed bug in over two years and I STILL have nightmares about them. Bring that couch into your house was a disaterous move, OP. Fuck everyone else, take that shit outside right the fuck now. Being in hot water for a little while is much better than the nightmare you're about to be living in.

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>>735667189
I found where OP lives and have taken care of it.

>>735667210
i called orken and they have sprayed 3 separate times for the things what are the chances they are dead? they have not done a final inspection but i have noticed sort of "mini bites" as in they itch for all of a few seconds and i never notice them again and there is at least one spot on my pillow

>>735667194
I was banking on them not getting outside in the first place.

>>735661635
Bro, youre so fucked. I had bed bugs for years. Literally, the worst time of my life. I still feel the stress from them. Its so gross. Im so sorry about how fucked you are.

>>735667434
They can easliy get out side.

>>735667434
they can fit in the smallest areas the couch is already inside and its already too late what color is the couch if white post a closeup and a large area so i can see if there is any spotting

>>735667516
how did you finally get rid of them once and for all?

>>735667434
You don't want that shit near you for miles never mind your shitty yard.

I had bed bugs, get a couple spiders, males, they'll eat em up, or lizards, my m8 had a beed bug problem till hos lizards (Lizzy and Charizard) ate em all up, it's been 3 years, haven't seen em since, though I have a seen a spike in lizards

>>735667611
You can use fireants too.

>>735667692
Fire ants kill the spuders though

>>735667397

>at least one spot on my pillow

Start from scratch. They survived.

>>735667528
>>735667521
>>735667582
Well thank god its just a hypothetical
>>735667692
Nigga fireants bite you too

>>735667762
Perfect. OP can host fights and afford a normal couch.

>>735667788
well the point of the final inspection is to look for any signs of activity and try again if there is any so i guess i will show him the spot when he comes

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hahahahahahahahahhahaha omfg just the thought of some faggot op fucking themselves with bedbugs this hard
i can't stop laughing
after years of dealing with them have been bed bug free for a year now and dear god is it amazing

make a thread in 6 months to update us when you and your family are on the edge of collapse and you are thinking of an hero'ing

say goodbye to pic related OP

>>735667397
It depends on how through the tech is treating and if they're being re introduced into the house. Sadly a lazy tech with a botched treatment job will keep them around. The product I use is Bedlam which is an instant kill can, except for eggs. The only legal product on the market that can penatrate bug eggs is Viking but that's what's used for tenting. Make sure that they're not being reintroduced and that you're following your prep sheet (they should have sent one before the treatment). Also depends on how many you have, sometimes it's best to discard infested furniture because the eggs can be so hidden away that it can't be effectively treated. Being sprayed 3 times should have taken care of you right issues but (and I know it sucks spending money on pest control than having to buy new furniture anyway) you probably wanna replace whatever beds or couches are infested/were infested/still getting bites from.

>>735667809
>fireants bite you too

In comparison I'd take the fire ants over bedbugs. I'm sure everyone else would agree.

>>735667313

This. Im fucking itching right now just thinking about them. I probably wont be able to fall asleep tonight because im going to keep feeling phantom itches now that theyre on my mind.

God have mercy on your pathetic soul, OP. You will carry physical and emotional scars from this incident for the rest of your life.

Light your house on fire and start over, don't give them a chance.

Oh god I can't sleep this is too good.

>>735667571
We didnt. We moved but they came with us. They get into every fucking thing. In the end we through away most of the furniture. We dont have much money so that was the only option. The carpet is the trick, tho. They cant get around without a carpet.

>>735667935
well like i said the bites i have noticed are nothing like the bites i used to get even during early infestation though im pretty sure they are only in the bed right now and i have not seen a single one either only the one spot on the pillow as far as reintroduction pretty sure i got them from a cab so i stopped taking them completely

>>735667397
The bites can be delayed for up to a few weeks at most, but the spot seems sketchy. Probably spray again.

Same, bed time was a hour ago

>>735661139
Welp, time to burn your house down.

Bedbugs are nasty shit, the only way to get rid of them really is copious amounts of diatomaceous earth EVERYWHERE combined with heating every individual room in the house to like 130F with a specialized heater for several hours.

Or freezing them to death in below like -30 degrees for hours.

Store-bought pesticides don't generally work on them anymore, and DDT, which worked right well, is banned because environmental concerns.

>>735668183
so the bites im noticing could just be ones that never flared up rising and falling again since they are so old? ill show the inspector the spot and im sure he will have them spray again

>>735662411
second, set the couch on fire and kill the bedbugs
first, kill your father
third, kys

>>735668329
Yes, your body could have a delayed reaction to the bites, good luck on your inspection though.

>>735668173
We tried putting ever clothing in a bag and leaving them outside during the summer. Also put achohol on everything works, too. Look for the smell of them. They have a sweet rotting smell in the couchs or under the bed.

>>735668329
No, doesn't matter anyway. Bombs away!

>>735664414
One company here in Finland that does the heat treatment thing heats rooms to 52C for about four hours. 52C is roughly 125F

>>735668173

Lmfaooo from a cab? You best hope you didnt catch scabbies. Hole lee fuck its just like bedbugs except they are microscopic and live inside your skin where they burrow and nest and lay eggs and shit. At least they are easier than bed bugs to kill.

>>735668251
This, seriously. Once they get settled, it's over, you have to destroy them before it's a problem and if you don't then the house needs burn in napalm.

>>735661139
Get it the fuck out of your house asap. Bedbugs are the devil and extremely difficult to get rid of. Then run everything that touched it through the washer and dryer. Vacuum the floor, get bedbug removal spray and spray everything etc. You basically have to go crazy right now in eliminating them or youll have them forever.

experience: worked in furniture repair and as a side effect had to deal with bedbugs

I had an infestation, used gas, glt most of em, the ones that escaped bred, now they're pretty goddamned established, I'm not talki g abkyt bugs either

>>735666841
>hyperbole.exe

>>735668412
What, your sauna company?

>>735668596
Lmao

>>735666706
You have to leave for about three years to make sure they all starve to death.

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>>735661139
That looked like a hole in your finger at first

>>735668482
Trust me that's not scabies. He'll know if he has scabies about a month after wards.

Its a relentless itch that gets worse when u scratch.

>>735668482
no i would know if i had scabbies

>>735668405
i grew very familiar with that smell but i have not sensed a hint of it since the second treatment

Is op kill?

>>735668765
This.

Have them right now and it's hell.

Weird. I had to get rid of a bed with bedbugs but they didn't spread throug the whole house.

If OP gets rid of the couch and hour ago he should be fine?

I sprayed colloidal silver liberally on the areas i knew they were living in. I also used diatomaceous earth on suspect areas to keep them from spreading.

>>735668871
Took me 6 months to get diagnosed even though I was sure it was scabies. It's the most misdiagnosed parasite in North America.

Went through hell.

>>735668744
>implying it isn't a hole now

>>735669211

Him and his family probably all took turns shooting themselves in the roof of the mouth with the family shotgun after googling bedbugs and confirming the eternity of torment they volunteered themselves for.

>>735669318
You are by far the dumbest one here. Not even OP is this dumb.

>>735669506
Ok. But my bedbugs are gone and there is a thread full of fucks that still have them.

>>735661139
>already brought it in.

burn down the house

>>735668153
>they can't get around without a carpet
sorry to tell you this anon but you're wrong
they can travel 10 meters in only an hour or two
and on just about any surface except anything that is extremely smooth like glass, some plastics, etc.

DUDE DON'T TAKE SHIT FROM THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!

THERE'S A REASON IT'S THERE!!! GOD DAMN OP DON'T BE A RETARD...

Your entire house is fucked now. as soon as ONE FUCKING BUG gets in your house is ruined... It will take hundreds to thousands of bucks to fix. I had them once, it took 900 dollars and 2 fucking years and it didn't get rid of them untill I burned everything, and left the place and stayed in a home with anti bug powder on litterally everything for a year. They DON'T GO AWAY, you should never take shit from the road.

>>735669709
Confirmed. Ive witnessed a bedbug traveling rather quickly and intently across a tile floor in the bathroom of a hotelroom i was staying in. Killed it and brought the body to the front desk where they ended up refunding me 100% with zero hesitation and giving me a free night for another time.

>>735661139

Im itching just thinking about the living hell you just unleashed on yourself.


I am lmaoing @ ur life

>>735669999

>>735669600
And I'm sure your crackpot hippy shit fixed it all for you.

>implying ionized water has an effect
>implying the couch was only there for an hour will save OP
>implying he can just pour dessicant on everything when now he has to bomb the fucking house.

Nigga are you for real?

Does anyone ever wonder why Microsoft owns a patent on genetically modified bed bugs? http://appft1.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO1&Sect2=HITOFF&d=PG01&p=1&u=%2Fnetahtml%2FPTO%2Fsrchnum.html&r=1&f=G&l=50&s1="20110010782".PGNR.&OS=DN/20110010782&RS=DN/20110010782

>>735669936
Fucking GET THE COUCH OUT IMEDIETLY

THEN GET ALCOHOL AND SHIT AND JUST DRENCH THE AREAS NEAR THE COUCH, EVERYTHING IN A 20 FOOT RADIUS.

TURN YOUR HEATER ALL THE WAY UP, LIKE... AS FUCKING HOT AS IT WILL GET, HUNDREDS OF DEGREES.

BURN YOUR CLOTHING THAT TOUCHED THE COUCH, AND BURN EVERYTHING THAT WAS ON THE COUCH. NOW OR THERE'S NO TIME.

>>735661910
They cant dig.

Throw dog blood everywhere. They hate that. Plus your house will look like a crime scene

Also why did Gates buy up 2.5mil shares of a company called ecolab in 2010? They are clearly benefiting from extermination of bedbugs in hotels. https://www.gurufocus.com/news/104835/gates-foundation-buys-ecolab-inc-goldman-sachs-monsanto-company-exxon-mobil-corp-sells-mt-bank

My brother brought some into our house (he used to work in a flooring company and them from a dirty carpet) our family struggled with them for 2 years, I couldn't sleep the whole night, bite marks everywhere, we tried bleach, steamers, tabacco, bed bug spray, special covers and what worked the best was CRIOLIN, after having to throw away furniture and matresses I wish I knew sooner of it.. Good luck OP, you idiot.

>>735670442
I'm not saying i understand it either. I did my research and forgot it all; if you think im going to do it again for you then fuck off.

What I posted is what I did, and I haven't seen a bedbug since.

Firstly its a bed bug, try not to be smart by being a fool. Call an exterminator asap. And dont sleep tonight as they will come to suck your blood, keep a light usually touch handy and kill it if you feel any itch or burning sensation. It must be because the bug is already biting and sucking your blood.

>>735661139
Cum on it

>>735670872
The dessicamt works.. On non fabrics.

But OP is waaaay beyond dessicant he brought in a nest.

Colodial silver is bs.

Glad u beat it but it wasn't the silver.

>>735661139
it's a bed bug, get th house fumagated or your land lorg can kick you out.

Visit website zappbug.com

Those bug shit are so stressful. Really
If you do not get rid that piece of furniture, you're going to have to deal with that plague. It is really difficult to kill a plague of bedbugs.
Those shit suck your blood, they could give you colds.

I am currently dealing with that plague. I've been trying to finish her for almost six months. The damn ones came because of a piece of furniture, like you.

They are difficult to kill because most of their time, they are in dark places like shadows, (seriously, they are incredible in that sense.I remember once I found one under a book... When I moved that book a little, bedbugs walked to the next shadow that was nearer, and then again I moved that other object where she hid in her shadow and the motherfucker went to look for another shadow... And the shit could go on all day, surely) they can also be in your black clothes, a black furniture, etc. Bug is smart which makes them very difficult to liquidate.

I can assure you that if you have weeks with that piece of furniture and you have not done anything about it ... Your bed should already have some of these bugs (much more likely if you have that furniture so close to your bedroom or in your bedroom)

Get rid of that shit already anon.

Remember to look good in your bed those bugs.
OR IN SOME SITE WHERE YOU ARE PLEASED TO SPEND MORE TIME. They always look for you. (it is not a joke)

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>>735663560
They can live up to 2 years. lol

They turn white and become immobile, but they continue to exist dormant!

Picture related, it's OP.

>>735670476
>IMEDIETLY
>IM E DIETLY
>IM A DIET
Do this, OP. Starve yourself until your blood is no longer nutritious. Anon's a genius.

My only hope is that OP was baiting out the whole thread. It seems unlikely he can get out of this without spending a lot of money otherwise. If this is real I feel like punching his retarded dad would be the most satisfying thing ever. That or making him sleep outside on the couch.

>>735671780
Thank you, I'm glad you got my secret code.

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I know a chemical that treats them but I will not be sharing here. lol

Sorry OP, you are dumb and deserve it for taking a couch in your house full of them.

They can all bite your ass at once, then you can be a pimple butt tranny for 4chan.

I seached google I think the images is orignal

>>735665244
Kek

Can someone please screencap this thread before it dies? OP is probably losing his fucking mind trying to stop the infestation right now and might not update us in time.

>>735672315
I'm on mobile so I can't but I second this request.

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>>735672315
Lol, yeah. Epic thread here.

Dude you're screwed. I lived in a townhouse and we got bedbugs. Exterminators came 3 times and it never worked. We ended up getting evicted for having bed bugs.

>>735668596
Kek

Put me in the screencap pogchamp

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KEK holy fuck op goooood luck lmao

Move and leave everything you own there, wash the clothes you're wearing and fucking go.
I slept in my bathtub for 6 months. It didn't stop them from eating me.
My uncle is an exterminator, he sprayed god now's how any times.

You will not get any sleep. You're fucked.

>>735661139
And this is the day that OP fucked up so hard he cant be saved

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Do not put him
>>735673000
in the screencap

I had bed bugs at my last place and here's the advice I'll give OP (even though some of it has been said already)

-Throw out the couch
-Take a heat gun or steamer to every square inch, nook and cranny in your house
-Put down diatomaceous earth wherever you can
-I went as far as to buy some Botaniguard to spread around. It's a fungal pesticide that can kill bugs... not rated for use indoors against bed bugs but I was at my wits' end and tried it

Haven't seen any since. Good luck OP.

>>735669955
tripdubs checked

>>735661139
Show more bedbugs in your finger. I need to fap.

>>735670460
>Due to the mosquitoes' natural affinity to penetrate the human skin, upon biting a human, the mosquito delivers the desired payload of an inactive Plasmodium protozoan, analogous to a malaria vaccine. Alternatively or additionally, if the mosquitoes provided feeding troughs with a nutrient and/or medicine, as determined programmatically by an operation component, the nutrient and/or medicine can also be provided to the living body.

They just want to make the world a better place.

>>735661635

Are you fucking retarded? Who cares if people are sleeping take the fuckin thing out

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>>735661601

who would even consider casually sitting or or even layng on this infested piece of garbage befor or after the treatment you described?

You get rid of thas shit asap.
>imagine you laying on the couch
>your face touching it
>but its cool
>the bugs inside the couch you picked up from the street are dead
> its cool
>so comfy

sick

>>735673742
Sure. Better. I'm sick of Bill gates and his God complex. Fucking kikes ruined our earth.

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>>735670460

hoooooly shit thanks anon

dude, got those little fuckers one time, took 8 months to finally kill them all. get someone professional now, or burn your house down.

>>735673913
OP would

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See this?
Shaq dont have to take no bed bugs
he broke once
he dont no take any no furniture from detroit road.

>>735674068
what is it?

>>735674440
Old boy Gates investments as of 6/2010

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>>735661139
Yeah.... Honestly dude, even if you do it yourself & don't higher an extermination company, it's still going to cost a decent chunk of money to get rid of them & even then, because ur not a pro you might not get it right the first time...
who FUCKING cares if other people are asleep? Take the fucking couch out NOW as to avoid any further damage, and if they complain just be a man and explain why you had to do it. You have to own your fuck ups since it will effect them... as one of the previous fags had posted, it takes a decently high level of heat & the right chemical treatment to rid your room (and eventual house) of these disgusting insects (I call them the Islam bug because they sneak in and drain the ignorant host, yet do nothing to advance the host or society in general... Allahu Snakbar...kek....)
Trust me, once they're in your room, you have about 1-3 days before they're in your whole house. I've never had them myself, but I worked at a hospital and we had to use special chemicals to clean a room once a patient was discharged, this was to prevent bed bugs from taking over the hospital in case the patient(s) had bed bugs in their personal belongings. I would say your best bet is to call & find out what chemical(s) your local hospital uses to clean their rooms and buy some of said chemical. I'm really sorry about what happened to you, but at the same time you learned that if you find furniture on the side of the road, you need to treat it THEN & THERE them leave it outside for at least a day or two before bringing it into your HOME. Treat furniture like minorities, don't trust them on face value, be prejudice... once and a while you'll meet a good one, but never trust them on first glance...
This was long, I'm drunk.... LEAVE (ME) BRITTANY ALONE!!!!!!!

kek OP's dad now has to pay potentially a grand on extermination just for a shitty couch

>>735665244
kek

>>735661139
Get rid of that shit. Bed bugs are so hard to fully get rid of

>>735661139
Get your place professionally sprayed
Afterwards spread diatomaceous earth around and vacuum thoroughly every day for a week.

op is ded