Feels Thread.

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>>734487164
gay
These are real feels.

I could really use going to sleep, but i don't feel sleepy at all. Also, really not looking forward to the "didn't get enough sleep" feeling. Hate that feeling so damn much.

>>734487164
im 12 btw

>>734487848
MODS MODS

My parents are wondering when I'll call, where did my baby go?
My friends are asking where I went.
I'm thinking where did I fall off.
What steps brought me here?

Nothing feels right anymore.
I swear my limbs aren't even the right length.

He brought my love back, after being gone for so long. I tried being clean for a while. But that always felt wrong. I never fit it, never moved at the right pace. He felt the same way, wanted the pain to finally go away. I promised him we'll get there together, but sent him off to buy cigarettes.

I know you're all worried sick. And I'm sorry I'm not around. I just need to feel whole again.
Even if it means being in the ground.

All I remember is euphoria in the park.
Shoes are so uncomfortable.

And I know you're all crying. And I'm sorry I let you down. But just put all your worries aside. But please don't forget my name. I don't need my love anymore. I've got it all figured out. My shoes are off and I'm tired.

>>734487993
My friend found out her childhood friend that was missing, died the other day.
She killed herself with heroin overdose. They found her laying in a park a few blocks from her apartment. She was laying in the grass with her shoes off, using her hoodie as a pillow, and a small blanket covering her.

Her ex fiancé just got out of prison that same week. They were going to kill themselves together, but at the last minute she made him go out to get a pack of cigarettes. When he came back to her apartment, she wasn't there. She was already dead.

The funeral was yesterday and she's not taking it well. I'm trying to cheer her up but I'm not good at this kind of thing at all. I hate seeing her upset. Her eyes look dead.

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>Had a gf
>Both of us were assholes, happy assholes, together
>She left me for one year and then she came back to be couple again
>Fucking happy, cause she is the only one around me that understand my sick jokes, etc
>It was only she and me.
>She is removed from her class to another, she met a lot of new people
>A month later, she's friend of a lot of new people
>I'm not. I felt jelly. There was some dudes who likes her in that group.
>One day she texts me
>"I want changes, anon"
>"Wut, wat, r u fuking gai?"
>"I want to see things from a different perspective. I can't change with someone so likely to me. Maybe we need to stop talking"
>We stop talking
>Now I texted she, because I fucking miss her.
>"Who is this" she answers
>"Its me, anon"
>"Uh, sorry, I am going to sleep. Look at these eyebags"
>She sends pic.
>I look at the pic and I want to cry

its cold. she should be here, hugging me and watching memes. She is so beautiful. I just cant. I am alone. Really alone.

>>734488498
do yourself a favor and do not message her anymore.

i'm sorry

>>734488650
I am obssesed with her. I cant forget her. All is see reminds me her. I'm pathetic. Shit

>>734488843
That'll happen for a while. Been 9 months since my bitch left and only just finally getting to the point where I don't give a shit now. It takes time but eventually she'll just be something that happened and someone that came and went long ago.

>>734488671
That was gay but, ok.

>>734489066
9 months. I don't know if I cand hold on that much.

>>734488498
I've been alone for 7 years now and I'm not behaving like a pussy. Live your own life, don't base it around something or somebody else cause you'll get burned.

>>734488671
thanks man

>>734489214
My whole life was her, literally. We met at 6. Now we're 21. Why things have to change?. Goddamn it.

>>734487848
You're a sick human being...

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>>734488843
i'm going through the same shit right now and i know how difficult it is. i miss her so much. i don't know how am i gonna get through this, shit.

>>734488671
Bravo my man, bravo. "Slow clap starting"

>"You're and addict, then be addictive, just be adicted to something else".

T2: Trainspotting 2.

>>734489209
Sure you can. You'll be alright. You'll look back and realize you dodged a bullet and even laugh it it.

Why is it that I want to pack everything in and move somewhere remote whenever I have a hangover?

Nice, a feels thread. Well, I guess I'll tell my story. My parents came to the US before I was born. They had me January 6, 2002. My first horrible experience with them happened when I was 6. I spilled some juice on my dads laptop and broke it. He screamed and hit me for the 1st time. That was tame compared to the other things that started to happen. I have three other siblings. They never felt this abuse. I was always psychologically abused by my parents. Mentally, emotionally, and verbally. This carries out even till now. Because of them I suffer serious depression. I am mostly devoid of emotion at this point. Well, thanks for the thread OP.

I lost my job last year. I have anxiety. Anxiety has cost me everything. I had a cade, a waifu, a small circle of friendos. But I kept having nervous breakdowns until I lost it all. Never even considered getting mental health until this month when I realized that I was truely alone. No friends or family. Getting treatment helped me see that alot. Now I wish I got help years ago.

I want to be happy

>>734490013
No offense, but like are you not still young and in school? As in you could talk to a counselor about your parents?

In my subcontious he resides
He has showed up in my dreams twice
All bad instances
The first he wreeked havoc and there was nothing I could do
I sat in torment
Feeling his wrath lashed out upon my resolve
Shit was fucking heavy
But now it's over
Second dream
Carole from the walking dead is killing him
And I don't agree
Thoughts were swarming my head
I didn't agree with the killing of another human being
I got the exact opposite of the first dream
I got to watch him suffer
It was eerie and decrepit
What the fuck even is this anyway
The sudden exit of someone I've known for a long time
Borrowing my acoustic guitar every weekend
Then hopping in some mazda crossover with 2 chicks
I was a god damn fool
I should've told him to fuck off
But I was weak then
Not wise to the ways of the psychotic mind
I've been in isolation for so long
After I gave up drugs only a few friends remained
I befriended many individuals in my exploits
The moments from then still haunt me today
Specific instances
Fucking psychedelics can either be the best thing ever
Or thrust you into a perpetual burning nightmare
If you ask me that's not worth it at all
After I came down from the shrooms I took for the last time, I felt destitute
I felt as if the world was against me
I felt like everything I knew would collapse cause all I want is for people around me to understand how things are from my perspective
The very gravity of every feeling I have
It's fucking tremendous
My disdain for drugs is fueled by a thousand charred furnaces in Satan's smithing workshop
Here's the thing
I'm insecure about being shy so I make up excuses for things
Probably not the greatest route to take
But I don't know how to approach it any other way
I'm about to lose my financial aid over this fucking bull shit
I want to beat myself up for being such an insecure bitch
Fuck I hate insecurity so god damn much
I used to date this awful girl
Fuck that insecure petty bitch

>>734490501
I already tried this. School made the situation worse.

bipolar dirty smelly girl
Can't believe I fucked over my best friend Richard for that shit
That in itself is a fucking story and a half
Anyway back to my ex
I grew SO FUCKING SICK AND TIRED OF HER GOD DAMN SHIT AND CRINGINESS I WANTED TO PUNCH HER AND HER TRASHY SHITTY MOM RIGHT IN THE THROAT WHAT THE FUCK WAS I THINKING DATING THAT STUPID BITCH. So fucking nasty and ugly. God fucking dammit I have ptsd or some shit from that relationship. How am I supposed to go to school and start a career with all this god damn baggage I carry. Fucking fuck is that even an excuse? I just don't know
I need some help
I don't know from who
But it would be nice for someone to lend me a hand
The lonesome road is no fun to walk
Not at all

>>734490538
Fug it's that one then this one
>>734490662

>>734490662
Hey, if you need someone to talk to, you can always talk to me. Drop a Twitter handle or some other social media.

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Possibly the saddest thing I've ever seen

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it's just a game breh, chill

we have forever

What if he was named after his dad's Blastoise...

>>734490581
What did the counselors do?

>>734490013
I regularly have to visit a doctor.
I have massive problems with my hip ever since my father stomped and shattered it.

I have scarrings where he pressed his cigarettes against my skin.

Every second of my life I will carry the pain and the marks of the torture he put me through. Every second I will carry the memory of my mothers blank look.
Of how she had given up and just let it happen.

You can clearly see the scar of when his abuse became sexual for the first time, of the stitches required to repair the damage.

I will also carry the memories of the doctors clearly not believing the excuses my dad made up but not interveneing either to avoid trouble.

But I will also carry the memory of my father drinking his way to an early grave.

I also get to look into the face of the woman who knows it all and still decides to carry me whenever I cant walk on my own.

End whenever I look at my two boys, my precious little boys I know one thing for certain: I am neither my father, nor my mother for I would rather shoot myself before harming them and catch a bullet before I allow anyone else to do so.

Carry on. Thema bad memories will never be replaced but others will join them.
And in the end you will remain undefeated.

>>734491032
Called my parents and told them about it every though I told the counselors not to. Got yelled at and hit. Got all my shit taken away. Wasn't allowed to leave the house for 2 weeks.

>Be me, browing 4chan
>See a thread asking how we "fix" the millennials
>Look at the first post for a minute, then keep scrolling
>Think about answering, or trying to answer
>Realize I have nothing to say
>Every generation has hated their generation, some try to fix it, some don't
>I'm just weary, why do we keep trying to fix things, keep confusing change with improvement
>It doesn't matter, the next generation will hate themselves as well, and change something else
>Scroll down to a feels thread
>Decide to try verbalizing my despondence
>Type a few lines, remember I have nothing worthwhile to say
>The need to communicate tries desperately to stave off the weight of indifferent depression
>A sigh, the empty feeling wins again. Maybe I should delete my thoughts rather than share
>Just like I do every other night

Maybe the thread will 404 before I hit "post"
Maybe someone else who just can't bring themselves to send their own message can empathize
Most likely, if anyone reads this, they'll will feel I wasted their time with my disorganized ramblings
I guess I don't care anymore, I just want to lie down and sleep. Maybe one day I'll wake up as someone else.
Maybe.

Goodnight, anons.

>>734491201
I feel you pain a lot. I know the trauma. Thanks for your story, it was more detailed than mine. People with authority can be morbid. Your father and my parents.

>>734488507
fuuuuuck, I talked to my dad today, but I'm going to call him tomorrow too.

>>734488843
Its okay Anon, currently going thru the same thing.Exact situation...
PS fuck you Amber

>>734490501
You NEVER talk to a school counselor or teacher about problems. EVER.

They will make it worse, either through stupidity, or much more often, out of sadism.

Never trust an adult. Never.

>>734490891
have you done any psychedelics or meditation to verify

>>734488498
Fuck her man. Everyone has someone for them and your other is out there

>>734487164
My friend killed himself the other day

>>734491343
This is me most of the time on 4chan. Or anywhere.

It just seems completely pointless to express anything anymore. And everytime I do, there's almost never a (you) waiting for me.

Have a good night, anonymous. In a week neither of us will remember this.

>>734491535
I asked because it worked out well for my friend back in High School, guess he was the exception though.

>>734490013
Adding to my previous reply.
The adverse effects of some of this shit was my inability to express emotion and even feel them. I also can't relate with others. I always see other parents and think, how are they so nice and I have these sadistic parents? When I was 13 I had an issue with cutting. I broke the habit and I'm 2 years clean.

I haven't been actually happy since I was 21. I'm 25 now. I've had fun, and happy days, but I haven't actually been happy in over 4 years. I just want someone to love me again. Real love. I miss it so much.

>>734487164
My mom apparently knows about my masturbation and she had left a large pack of tissue paper in my room yesterday. I don't know how to feel about this but I think that my life must have gone pretty wrong some time ago.

>>734491724
Just a (you) for you in the hope it makes you smile.

>>734490013
Break shit, get hit.

>>734491820
Again adding on, I have never felt real love. Because of how I was molded, I can't talk to guys let alone girls. I just wish for someone to just hold me sometimes. Hold my hand as I sleep and comfort me. But that never happens. All I do is just cry into my pillow until I finally fall under the deep blanket of sleep.

>>734487164
Well lookit tha fancy /b/tard what can afford a car, lets all congradulate this our brother for his stroke of efficancy in obtaining a superiour modus of locomotion.

>>734491724
I feel the same thing when it comes to explaining my depression and anxiety to others, even therapists.
So I don't even try anymore, I just act happy. They will never understand. I would never be able to explain why, or how.
My family will never know, never understand. To them I'm just a happy boy that doesn't want to do college anymore.
Fantasizing about suicide just brings me relief. That and escaping through watching league of legends streamers on twitch.

>>734492025
I understand that but when it's out of sadism after that then you get people that become fucked up like me.

>>734492133
I feel this on so many levels.

>>734492207
feels good to know someone knows.

>>734492133
Exactly.
If you do say anything,
>everything is temporary! It's always darkest before the storm, anon.
It might be better some days, but it's never going to "get better". Why don't you understand that? There's something seriously wrong.

But it's like there's a wall between me and everyone else. It's just easier keeping that wall up and not bothering with trying to talk to anyone about it.

>>734491724
Funny, I stayed up after all in hopes of some sign of life. You took the time to respond. I guess I'm glad to know I'm not alone in this, but sorry you're in the same boat. Here's to (you), and this fleeting, digital moment of human connection.

"I don't want love,
I don't want forgiveness,
I just want morphine."
-A Young Doctor's Notebook

>>734492518
Precisely man. And in the meantime you just have to suffer through the situation you're in because you are literally, alone. Virtually impossible to communicate it, or find anyone that would understand it. So there's no way out, no help to be found. You literally have to keep treading. And that's why I like to fantasize about suicide. Such relief just thinking about it. Because that is the only out.
However, I could never do it. But I dream about it. This is actually the closest I've felt to not being alone in my woes in a long time, the responses in this thread.
So thanks.

Any tips to forget someone?

>>734492979
get someone different maybe, idk i wanna know too

>>734492979
You can't unless you hit yourself in the head too many times to cause some damage or something, other then that just keep living on. You'll be in pain for awhile but it won't be easy

>dad died two months ago.
>inherited a bunch of money.
>still super depressed
>wanna kill myself every day

>>734492518
I know this feel too.

I went to a therapist for a long time. In the end, I felt like I was "too smart" for her.

What I mean isn't that I'm some incredibly smart person but rather, my brain could find a counter to all her arguments.

She was a good therapist, it's just that I don't think many people can really understand some kinds of depression.

I wish I could stop hurting the people that I love. I wish I could. But I'm weak.

>>734487315

Fuck

>>734492891
Out of the endless sea of faces, looks like several kindred spirits washed up on this shore. I've been lurking, and can relate.. I feel like I've found a bonfire I can try to warm myself at for a moment. I know the chill will return when I leave, but perhaps we will wind up here together some time again. Perhaps - meaning almost certainly - but whether or not we recognize that moment or wordlessly pass along who can say. What I'm trying to say is that I recognize this as fortunate chance, and also thank you

>>734493230
I'd really like some ramen right now.

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As much as you try to be there for someone, you can't win them you know? I just give in and accept the reality.

>>734488843
Just focus on yourself. I was like that a little while back. Focused on myself, lost 30 pounds, dress better now, better relationships with my friends, more experience, and I have a new gf who gave me the best blowjob I have ever had today.

It gets a lot better.

>>734492891
>>734493386
I'm sorry we're all here. But it's nice to know I'm not completely alone in the feeling.

Thanks to you guys as well.

>>734493230
I've seen all the gore threads, seen pictures of cutting even but for some reason, THIS picture got to me.

Don't hurt yourself, anon.

>>734493386
We're both on this Earth together somewhere, right now. Looking at our own screens.

>>734493714
>>734493386
>>734493198
>>734492615
>>734492518
>>734492207
Good night anons. May peace find you all. I'm sure we'll meet again.

I wish I had someone to cuddle with. I've given up on the idea of actually sharing
a life with someone, because I don't have a life to share outside of work, vidya and
awkward silence, but I really feel like I need physical contact.
Maybe I should stop being cheap and start looking for prostitutes instead.

>>734494336
Night Anon

>>734494566
We do need physical contact. Our bodies and minds literally need it. It's unfortunate we live in a culture that is so cold and detached. I think you can satisfy this necessity with animals too, hug and pet a dog or cat. Maybe you can find one that understands you.

>>734492044
My post^
>>734494566
I feel like this all the time.

>that feel when so starved for physical contact I get a boner from petting an animal

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Any other anons hopelessly in love with someone who doesn't reciprocate your feelings?

Why do I have to be like this? I live on hope that doesn't exist.

>>734488498
I'm sorry man. If I could impart some advice onto you, it would be to cherish her memory, but move on. You will gain nothing by reminiscing. Not to discourage you, but attempt to pick yourself back up. Anyway, best of luck friend.

>>734495124
I used to be for a little bit, relates to my previous adventures actually. Can Greentext if needed.

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>>734495402
I'm interested anon.

>>734495402
Here we go, this is a sidequel to the JewFag Adventures in Getting Waterboarded. Happened alongside this.
But before I post OC, I will post the previous adventure to get people up to speed.

>Be Me, 14 years old.
> Filthy Jew faggot, parents wanted me to go on a birthright trip with some "friends" that I had known for a while in middle school.
>For the rest of this trip, I will be referring to this as the Israel trip.
>Attended this school from 1st Grade to 8th, in 8th we go to Israel.
>School shilled the trip to make us stay there, was a pretty shitty education, for they didn't teach some essential shit properly, fucked me later in high school.
>Arrive at Jerusalem airport, normal shit, faggots ignoring me like they had normally done throughout my time there.
> A Day and a 1/2 in, tired, we are going to the underground western wall
>Note about the trip: We were going with 2 other middle schools.
>On way to the place, fall asleep due to jet lag.
>FirstIncident.jpg

>>734495651
>I fall asleep next to a guy on the bus, Dickhead doesn't even try to wake me up.
>Nobody notices me, like usual.
>Stuck with Israeli bus driver
>Somewhat dazed and confused, go with bus driver to his parent's house.
>Dude speaks no english, have no idea what he is saying.
> At this point, I feel bad for him, due to the fact that this faggot just showed up (me).
>Get back to the group, at the wall.
>A group of 40 jewish children, including the ones i knew, all look at me, and start laughing at me.
>This is when I realized that life was not going to work out well for me.
>Worst part however, was not the fact that the kids were laughing at me, that was expected, save a few.
>The worst part was the fact that the chaperones, teachers of mine, were also laughing, and did not try to help me in the slightest.
>I trusted these people, and this act of negligence, in addition to 2nd incident (coming soon), almost sent me off the deep end, thought about an heroing.

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>>734493714
>>734493386
>>734493198
>>734492518
>>734492207
>>734494336
I'm saving a memento. Maybe after I've forgotten, I'll stumble across it, and remember these moments of warmth. I love you, anons.

>>734495737
>Back to the story
>I then watch everyone i thought I knew, slowly cave to peer pressure.
>AsExpected.jpg
>Fast forward to a few days later.
>Friend of many years up to that point invites me to talk in his room.
>2ndIncident.exe has started running
>The Time has come for the 2nd incident
>Go into friend's room, lets call him Zach
>Zach then, along with 2 other faggots
>They then take me, place me under the sink, place towel tight on my face, and pour water.
>Waterboarding.jpg
>Too scared, brain gets sensation of drowning
>Throw up a little, immediately goes back into mouth.
>This, although it was only 2 minutes, felt like an eternity.
>Especially because it was by someone I trust, in addition to the 2 guys who helped him (also trusted them)
>Walk out stunned, lost faith in humanity.
>...

>>734495737
>After Israel Trip
>I attempt a form of communication with this man, after about 3 weeks of minimal communication with the outside world.
>During this time, I attempted suicide.
>Parents thought I was being overdramatic.
>Probably was.
>Back to the story
>I skype this man,
>I ask him "Zach, why did you waterboard me?"
> He replies "Well anon, I just wanted to. And you were the easiest to do it to because I knew you wouldn't resist."
> I have not spoken to him since.
That day has haunted my memory for years now, because it is a constant reminder of how I can never truly trust anyone, and how even those who you think understand, never will. Thank you for listening in on my faggotry.
>Flash Back to week before end of school.
>Depressed as shit, look around to see if anyone cares about what just happened.
>As normal, nobody does
>In fact, school attempts to cover up the issue, and pretends like it didn't happen (The bus incident that it, not the waterboarding)
>Even if the waterboarding got out to beside the kids, Zach's parents have enough money to "make it all go away".
>I confront the school about the bus issue, they say it was a problem and won't happen again.
>I know its bullshit, but i let it go.
>However, my parents (my mother) stopped supporting the school (My dad wanted to pretend like nothing happened)
All in all, lesson is to never trust kids, or people in general. I learned that lesson the hard way.

>>734494566
You don't need prostitutes, you need to get a hold of your life. Get in ok-ish shape, you don't have to be a model, but don't be a slob either. If you have that, ask yourself how many people now you. If it's not much, then ask yourself if you wanna be remembered, either in a good way, or a bad way. And realize that you will waste your life if you try to blend in. Standout! Somebody IS going to like you. Some people may not, but you can just ignore them! You have nothing to lose by trying to standout, because you don't have any friends to lose in the first place. The only thing that can happen is you either get friends, or you stay with what you have now. Either way you lose nothing by trying. Be confident Anon, and I gauruntee someone will like you.

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>>734488498
im getting a bit feelsy.

> be me depressed
> meet grill at shit job i have 3 years ago, hit it off start dating
> my mom dies six months into our relationship
> she had a miscarriage
> shes my whole world
> fast forward to 2 months ago
> getting ready to buy ring, pop the q and start a family
> she cheats on me and leaves me for some faggot in his mid 30s whos a delivery driver with 2 kids from 2 other women
> be so fucked up from that and shit that happened over my life, start therapy and on depression meds
> find out thyroid is fucked up
> gain weight from depression meds
> be super fucked up in the head as this girl is constantly playing games blaming me
> finally got the courage to block her number tonight after talking with her sister (her sister and i are close and consider each other family as we were there for each other through shit)
> feel so fucked up because not talking to her feels horrible but probably for the best

i cant get over her /b/, god dammit. i gave her my all and she fucking just lies and treats me like shit and leaves me shattered in pieces. trying to fill the void with any girl that gives me attention but it doesnt help. currently drinking a beer still fucking working because its the only thing i can do to occupy my mind... How did you faggots get over you "One".....could use some help

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>>734492724

>>734495124
I feel like an asshole because somebody told me that they've loved me all year, and asked if I felt the same way. But I had to say I didn't because there's another girl

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>>734487164
Standard day stuck in traffic boo fucking hoo.

>>734487164
I have a really good story I've been wanting to tell but I'll just have to wait to see how it finishes.

Hopefully I don't kill myself before I see how it ends.

>>734487315
>>734493361

That's fake. A nurse would never provide information about a patient, alive or deceased, to a stranger. It's illegal.

>>734496044
My "one" constantly cheated on me and played with my head. There's nothing you can do when you love someone and they treat you like that. Just keep her away from you and anything that reminds her of you for the next year or so. I still have pics of me and my ex around but they don't pull any feeling anymore. I was also a huge drug addict when I met her so I would also suggest questioning what made you get into such a disastrous situation in the first place (for closure's sake.)

>>734496044
Ask her sister out.

>>734495818
Well, Jewfag here, now starts the OC (starts after bus incident)
>Grill comes up to me
>From school that I was in, as opposed to the 2 others.
>Knew her for a while, never really had a long conversation with her.
>Lets call her "Madison"
>After Bus incident
>Kind of depressed, due to about 30-40 people laughing.
>"Hey anon, you alright?" she says, while smiling
>Previously, I knew she was not accepted among her own peer group (considering I was in a grade of 13 people, it was possible (6 guys, 7 girls))
>Anyway, we talk a bit more over the trip, about how she "had no friends" as well
>Basically, I later find out that this period was when i started to get honey-potted.
>Develop a relationship with this girl.
>Cue end of summer, we split into our seperate schools (I went to an all boys school, she an all girls, but the schools often collaborate on events such as dances.)
>I start to believe that she might be a good person, maybe can even use her as an entry point into getting comfortable talking to women.
>I find out that this is not the case on Homecoming.

>>734496658
Anyone interested in me continuing?

>>734488378
You're a good man.

>>734496658
I can see why you were waterboarded. You never shut the fuck up.

>>734496870
Sorry.

>>734496044
in tears

>>734496947
Are you a girl?

>>734496821
Ive been lurking please continue friend.

>>734496870
stupid nigger

>>734493230
>cutting yourself
That's pussy-tier shit anon. If you wanna self harm, cut parts where they're not visible and make sure they're deep. Or give yourself blunt trauma to dull yourself.

>>734496821
continue my guy

>>734496936
Don't be sorry. Just stop over thinking every situation in your life. Put all that shut behind you and move on.

>>734496610
sister dating a friend of mine so that's a no go. maybe if they broke up, but im not a piece of shit to go behind someones back like htat

>>734497061
Nope. Just trying to help him see he's a blathering crybaby.

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>>734497041
i dont see anything wrong with this. you think i didnt cry over a woman who watched my mother take my last breath with me? who had a miscarriage with me? emotional connections are hard as FUCK to break when they are strong like that friend

>>734497430
I was just asking. Not meant to be an insult.

>>734493135
i feel you man. Lost my dad this past february a week before my birthday this shits the worst

>>734496658
Alright, I guess I'll continue. This last part isn't as feels-like, so sorry about that.
>Turns out she completely 180'd and was convinced that I was actually a douche by non other than fuckin' zach.
>So needless to say, I am at homecoming, and get this message
>"Hey Anon, I need you to come outside for a moment. Its important"
>FuckNo.jpg
>By this time, I realized that anytime anyone wanted me alone, it means they are fucking with me, so i get a proxy to come outside and report to me on what was happening.
>Of course, Zach and Madison were plotting to have me on camera crying after she rejected me.
>Not Today Bitch
> I come out, acting surprised, then get video evidence of this scum ridden plot, and show it to their friends, who are NOT scumbags (for the most part)
>A month later, she calls me back up.
>Hear afterwards that they got together and shit.
>4 months go by, at Basketball homecoming
>Relationships for them recovered.
>Since I am a fucking paranoid son of a bitch, I plant a mole who doesn't like either of them into their circle of trust.
>Here the fun begins.

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>>734497524
my bad /b/ro. feels getting me deep tonight. having lots of ups and downs. got shit faced at a bar last weekend dropped 60 bucks buddy had to drive me home. i guess the whole way home i blamed myself and kept asking if she left me because i was a shitty person. no hard feelings

>>734489814
I don't know how to interpret that but it makes me sad :(

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These threads are the thing I wish I could feel with normal people. The feeling that I'm really not alone. Nothing is getting better, but I feel accepted and understood. I've never been able to explain to people why I love this place. /b/. How can someone as tame but outcast as me feel at home with edgelords that laugh at the death of children and small pets? But these threads. These threads tell me we're all human. These threads show me that these actions do not define us as people. It shows me that the most cruel heartless people I've ever known still have hopes and dreams and love and pain. It shows me that we can all be accepted somewhere. Even behind all the insults and KYS messages, I can still feel like it's where I belong. We're all hurt and different. Misunderstood and unacceptable elsewhere. This is where you can literally be a homicidal nazi and still be considered part of our big cancerous family. And as cheesy and fucking dumb as it may sound, there's something humbling about that to me.

>>734490581
>literal autism
social services if it is too much
if not, just avoid it and live with it as much as possible
>get sick grades to go to uni
try to get shit dad to pay for it, if not then just take a loan and gtfo and become independent
you have one more year of highschool yea? finish that shit and become your own person

>>734497754
>cont?

>>734489610
That's fucking old, newfag.

Still good.

>>734497754
>First approach her on the 2nd homecoming, with a few pictures of zach cheating on her.
>Being the loyal whore that she is, she demands that I delete them immediately.
> I respond
>I just want one thing from you
>"What"
> I need Zach's phone number
>You see, he only gave out his phone number to people he trusted, and none of them were me, so I never got the chance to get it.
>OhHowTheTablesHaveTurned.png
>I organize a group of about 10 individuals, many of whom would become good friends of mine.
>They spam his account.
> I also, during the homecoming, managed to get a glimpse of his login info for instagram, and got that.
>Now we strike
> While he was distracted with the spamming, I get into his account and upload the pictures and describe how he is a scumbag, including the waterboarding of me, the Jewfag.
>For once in my life, something goes my way.
>I delete all evidence of my being there, change the login info, and send it to all his friends.
>Zach goes berserk
>according to the mole i had in his friend group, he was so angry that he punched several holes in school walls, and beat the shit out of one of his friends.
>His reputation ruined
>Mine kept at a minimum
>Since I intentionally downplayed my intelligence all of middle school, he doesn't suspect its me.
Feels good to have justice done.
And Zach, if you are reading this, I honestly, and sincerly, hope you hang yourself.
And that, ladies and gentleman, is the conclusion to the stories by me, Jewfag. Have a good night, and may you all find peace within yourselves.

>>734495767
Saved as well, anon. I just got in the thread, but have a (You) and a good night.

>>734499131
Shalom

>>734499131
epilogue, I am now attempting to get my life back in order, and do something with it. All i know is that, for the time being, my future is looking up, ever so slightly. May you all have a good night, and find happy endings as well.

Fragile happiness.
A mind divided.
Slavery or freedom?
Dopamine or Seratonin?
Burger or Banana?
Fat or thin, pills to arouse or sedate me.

I still don't know what I want.
If I tried, I could be the person I want to be, but I don't want to try.

Instead, I just mindlessly consume. God, I love capitalism.
God, I hate capitalism.

Two sides to a coin.
Two sides to my life.
Enjoyment then regret.
Happiness and then sadness.
Fleeting pleasures roam my body.

Sugar
Porn
Electronics

If only I could give them up. But I can't.

Tired eyes.
A mind still divided.
I'm going to sleep this time.
Maybe forever.

>>734499396
Basically, thank you all for listening to my faggotry/autism, and for the last time, have a good night everybody, I hope you find peace. In addition, i am sorry for any annoyances I have caused. Again, Thank you.

>>734499613
You're doing great work, from what I'm reading.

Godspeed, anon.

I remember when you were alive, so vibrant and full of life. I wanted to tell you how i felt, I know you felt similar. I remember you used to wait for me everyday at my locker, meeting between classes. That smile you had could light up even the darkest of rooms. I wanted to call you that day and bring you to a special, beautiful place. I was exhausted and fell asleep when I got home from school. Waking up in the morning, I overheard the news talking about a young teen dying. They didn't give much detail, not even releasing the name. At school you weren't there, I figured that you were sick and I went into class. When I heard that the girl who died in that car wreck was you, I felt an irreplaceable part of myself die. I'm hollow and lost without you. It's been 12 years, but I still feel the pain of your loss. I love you, Kinnie.

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>25 this week
>failure in all categories

>>734499601
Great poem, anon. Hope you get through it

A lot of people come to these threads expressing their despair at a lost love or something similar, but it's the opposite for me. I don't feel like I love anyone or anything, not my family, not my friends, nothing. They could die tomorrow and I doubt I would feel much at all. I want to avoid relationships because I don't want anyone falling in love with me when I can't offer the same back. I do wish I was different, but I don't think that can be trained.

>>734487164
I'm so lonely and tired of being lonely. I want to be held, I want to cuddle. But statistically, I don't think I'll ever find "the one"...
I have a niche fetish, feederism, force feeding and weight gain. "Hefty" is the only thing that turns me on, planning to plump up and be soft and cuddly myself. The 50 pounds I've added to my skinny frame in the past 2 years have already made me feel hella sexy. I want somebody who feels the same way as I do, not just somebody who is "okay" with letting themselves go a little bit.

I'm very shy, quiet and introverted.

I want to find somebody nerdy and intelligent. Somebody with critical thinking. I just can't stand normies and their groupthink mentality. Most people don't even read books! Being on a few isolated subreddits really sheltered me from how dumb "average" people are until I stopped redditing.

So I'm looking for a small percentage of the population (high intelligence) with an extremely niche fetish AND a specific personality. Oh, and it would be optimal if I could fall in love with them.

It's never gonna happen. Maybe 10 people in all of Vancouver rn, 9 of which are taken and the last one buried like a needle in a haystack. It's like searching for the 0.000001% of the population.

I want to cuddle often and frequently, I want to give mutual massages in the nude, I want to have somebody that pushes me to be the best "me" I can be, and vice versa. I want that soft butterball to be holding me from behind, not letting go as we drift off to sleep.

I'm so lonely, I'm all cried out. Maybe I'll find somebody "eventually" who isn't half way around the world, but the years waiting for then are gonna be pure hell. Maybe I should just accept being melancholy and lonely on the inside.

>>734496437
stranger? A volunteer who gets close to a patient could very well obtain that info from a known nurse (legal or not people talk)

>>734502244
:/

>>734499613
Finally, a story here that ends with someone manning up and not whining about how much of a massive faggot they are and why they aren't willing to snap out of it. Much respect to you, may those assholes rot in hell and good luck.

>Be from shitty household
>Mom was abusive and my dad never left
>Dad always told me and my siblings to just shut up so it wouldn't get worse
>Develop severe social anxiety disorder
>Become a shut in for five years
>Finally at 18 get a job waiting tables
>It's fucking miserable but at least I'm doing something
>Start getting my shit in order, get GED, get license, work out
>Dad is proud of me and talks about me quitting job so I can go to school
>Find dad having a seizure in the middle of the night
>Brain cancer
>Can barely talk anymore. Can't walk
>Quit and become a caretaker because my mom tries to hold basic needs (food, bathing) hostage from him
>He dies after being in excruciating pain for a year
>Left all insurance policies to my mom
>She spends it all on stupid shit from amazon she doesn't remember ordering and trips to different countries
>Miss my dad every day
>She talks shit about him every chance she gets
>Can't do or say anything because I afford to move out yet

Feels bad man.

>>734505248
I don't understand how this is a "feels" thing.
This seems to be extremely well articulated and the girl in question seems to have tons of motivation to think that the guy she's speaking with is objectively a huge cunt.
Like it's not random insults, they seem to be specific, and with intent and emotional baggage behind them.

It's not really feels material, seems to me it's a terrible person getting pretty much what they deserve after acting horribly to someone else.

>>734504956
Damn dude. I'm really sorry. I'm from an abusive household as well, hate my parents. I got out, I'm living on my own. They took my childhood away from me and sheltered me to keep me dependent on them. But I'm slowly learning how to be my own adult, slowly catching up on what I missed. You can do it, and you'll be able to spit in that bitch's face when she's an old tired lady begging for your sympathy and support on her death bed. Spit hard, then saunter away with a skip in your step. You can do it anon, stay strong.

>>734488378
Just listening sometimes can be the best thing. That is rough you're an amazing person

>>734496437
my mums a nurse and she tells me stuff about patients all the time and talks to other people about stupid stuff some people come in for

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Is a .22lr round powerful enough to kill someone from a self inflicted gunshot wound?

>>734487164
more like a sook thread. take a tablespoon of cement and harden the fuck uo gurly boi

>>734487993
Day after day, love turns grey
Like the skin of a dying man.
And night after night, we pretend its all right
But I have grown older and
You have grown colder and
Nothing is very much fun any more.
And I can feel one of my turns coming on.
I feel cold as a razor blade,
Tight as a tourniquet,
Dry as a funeral drum.
Run to the bedroom,
In the suitcase on the left
You'll find my favorite axe.
Don't look so frightened
This is just a passing phase,
One of my bad days.
Would you like to watch T.V.?
Or get between the sheets?
Or contemplate the silent freeway?
Would you like something to eat?
Would you like to learn to fly?
Would'ya?
Would you like to see me try?
Would you like to call the cops?
Do you think it's time I stopped?
Why are you running away?

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>>734505517
That whole thing started because I work two jobs and she was upset because I wasn't spending enough time with her. She is unemployed and lives with her parents but she was all I had aside from work, and now all I have is work. I tried really hard with her but she always guilt tripped me about not spending enough time with her as if I was just deciding to ignore her to be an asshole instead of working. She didn't understand that I can't just abscond away at the drop of a hat. I tried.

I basically lucked into that relationship and I don't see myself lucking into another one for a long time. Her entire beef was "stop working so much and pay attention to me" while I was breaking my back trying to facilitate both.

Last year, I was in a terrible breakup. Devastated and really gave up. I was on these feels threads all the time. I wanted to say thank you to each and everyone of you who would speak and give advice.

Many of them said once I got in a better place to come back and help others. Honestly you can all find that better place because it is within you.

To seek perfection is to be alone. So compromise, and have fun doing it. The only way to defeat your fear is by taking action. Analyze what you feel and why. Then if there is something you don't want, ask yourself what Are you doing to change it.

Tl;dr I recommend you read "The Magic of Thinking Big" and I love you

you knooow what i wish i could do?
i wish i couldn't feel anything, like sadness, hate, love and all that stuff
i feel too much and i hate it, how do i get to not feel

Could any kind anon post some feels music? I don't really feel up to searching for something fresh right now.

>>734505789
i'd die for those two things :/

>>734505789
Damn.. I hope that anon is doing okay still even to this day.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7k5_0XZXPkU

>>734491343
I think an old Pink Floyd song sums it up the best - "I have become comfortably numb"

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>>734506802
same

>>734506107
>.22lr
HELL NO, idk if youre trolling but a .22 youd have to shoot yourself like 7 times just to die, fuck that.

>>734506107
Absolutely. It will tumble in your skull and bounce around. More reliable than anything other than maybe a shotgun.

>>734506960
I hope you are trolling.

Couldnt be fucked greentexting cause im on mobile
I know I'm an entitled white boy and my father wasn't an abusive drunk and my mom loves me and I have privileges some people would dream of but it still feels so damn hard man, everyone expects so much from me sometimes and I don't want to let anyone down, I don't love my girlfriend anymore but I stay anyway cause it'll destroy her if I leave so I guess I do it to myself but a guy just needs to let it out sometimes. I'm sorry you guys, I hope everything gets better for you soon.

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Every time I go to the movies I end up falling in love with the main actress, get sad, think of some way to look and act better then never go through with it and the cycle fucking continues. This shit sucks. I want a human so badly.

Pic related cause I saw Wonder Woman today. Great movie btw. Hyped for what D.C. Has to offer now.

>>734491680
Damn anon, got idea why?

>>734508491
Chemtrails

>>734493198

>this

When you spend so much time in your own head thinking shit over yourself, chances are you've already thought about whatever they tell you and thought of a million reasons against it.

>>734507020
T. Fudd