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Ask a procrastinating doctor whatever

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

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Ask a procrastinating doctor whatever
>>
Smells like teen spirit is about a poor teenager getting forced into prostitution, then the other people in her school taking advantage of her right?
>>
do you think that harry potter will come together with cho in hp5?
>>
>>734158813
why don't white people care if trump does a bad job?
>>
how do i get a psychiatrist if broke in college
>>
>>734158813
What do you practice specifically
>>
Will you ever answer a question?
>>
>>734159367
Go to an ER and say you want to kill yourself. You'll be admitted and will see a psychiatrist within 24hrs
>>
>>734159974
Internal med
>>
>>734158813


>>734158813
How hard was med school? Could I do it?
>>
when will you guys be replaced by efficient and effective robo-docs, rendering you obsolete?
>>
>>734158813
What's your salary? Do you consider yourself rich?
>>
Have you ever had a patient die due to a mistake you've made?
>>
How much wood can a woodchuck chuck?
>>
Are CRNAs and Anesthesiologists in danger of losing their jobs in future do to machines being able to perform anesthesia functions?
>>
>>734160396
if chuck would chuck woods?
>>
>>734160396
A woodchuck could chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood
>>
>>734160206
Med school is tough as fuck. But if you get accepted its pretty much a guarantee you'll graduate unless you quit or do something retarded on a professional level
>>
>>734160276

hopefully soon, I don't want to deal with human docs when I'm old considering I know all the bullshit that goes on behind the scenes

>>734160305
about 300k/year. I'm a single guy so yeah I feel rich as fuck and I pretty much just buy whatever I want and go wherever I want. But if I fuck up and get married and have kids or something I'll probably feel middle class

>>734160349
Not yet. Everyone that died on me so far would've died anyway no matter what

>>734160462
nah, Anesthesiologists will be fine
>>
>>734158813
They ever gonna cure herpes?
>>
>>734158813
Should society view doctors as heroes?

Ever got some pussy based on your profession?

How old are you roughly?

Best perk of being an MD?
Worst?
>>
>>734161072
What about CRNAs? Are they going to have less of a role in the future?
>>
anesthesiologists are in danger from crna's. the VA already replaced them
>>
>>734158813
Do you look down on other medical professionals that aren't physicians?

Would you advise someone in their 30's returning to school to pursue med school?
>>
>>734161265
psychiatrist here

1. doctors are superheroes

2. yes

3. 30s

4. respect and money and people know im a genius
>>
>>734161180
roll for this.
I need to know.
>for a friend
>>
>>734161456
like nurses? yes of course u look down on everyone else.

do not go to med school in your 30's. its ruining.
>>
>>734161180

you can take acyclovir prophylactically to suppress outbreaks.

this can be done if u break out a lot or ur with a chick and u dont want to break out... cuz she doesnt know
>>
>>734161552
>Ruining
Explain
>>
>>734160206
you cant even get INTO med school. no, u cannot get through med school.
>>
Do you secretly laugh at patients with tiny penises?
>>
>>734161682
theres always a couple of old balls in med schools. i went to university of southern california so our class was about 200. had about 3-5 old balls in them.

they always struggled. hard to be superhuman in ur 30s.
>>
>>734161769
yes. also, yes.

also, when u put a catheter in them or actually when u see a hot chick hold the penis it can be sexy slash funny
>>
>>734160151
This is 100% accurate. I've taken my friend to the er, admitted about 3 hours after.
>>
>>734160276
a.i. is slow.

cant even replace radiologists yet
>>
Ever seen a case of Stevens-Johnson Syndrome?
>>
>>734158813
Tell us about the hottest girl you got to see naked in the course of your duties
>>
>>734158813
I've had a cough for about a year now. It kinda feels like my lung itches. Every 30 minutes or so I get that "itch" feeling and just have to cough.

I don't smoke and I don't cough up anything. It's just a dry cough. I should get a chest x-ray but what do you think it could possibly be?
>>
>>734161990
yes, from a kid who took antibiotics.

ive seen some shit.
>>
>>734161180

nope, I don't see it happening until they invent nanomachines like in metal gear

>>734161265
1. yes and no. We get so many benefits that we don't really need recognition or thanks. But some faggots treat us like overpaid waiters or hotel managers and that pisses me off
2. no
3. 31
4. best perk: social status, harem of nurses
worst: debt, sacrificing all that time in your 20's, being on call

>>734161298
>>734161335
no shit? I guess they are fucked

>>734161456
No, we're all on the same team. I only look down on holistic hippie fags that call themselves doctors after going to some 2 year "med school" and tell people to meditate their cancer away.
I have a colleague that just graduated residency at 39. The dude is the happiest person I know because he's doing what he's always wanted to do
>>
how do i get opiates without having real pain
>>
>>734161790
>all this talk of superheroes
Your telling me if I study hard and work my ass off it won't be enough?
>>
>>734160396

how much will will will smith smith if will smith will smith will?
>>
>>734162013
an xray will do nothing.

u should get ur affairs in order
>>
>>734162138
100% thats what im telling u.

also, intelligence is 80% heritable. Can't modify that so good luck with that
>>
>>734162107
Thank you for your responses bro

Also what are you opinions of DO's? Are they 'hippie' doctors?
>>
>>734162124
if ur black go to the er and say ur having a sickle cell crisis.

otherwise, stay away from opiates kids. for real
>>
My only question. Are dentists doctors? Should I call my dentist 'doctor' when she cleans my plaque
>>
>>734162348
most DO's are rubbish.

that's why they're a level below m.d.'s and always will be allah willing
>>
>>734158813

What makes you come to 4chan? Old hobby that never died?

What other specialty were you thinking?

Are you a resident or actually a big-boy doctor?
>>
>>734162504
dentists dont clean plaque.

dental hygienists do.

they also happen to earn the highest salary without a bachelor's.

and obviously dentists aren't doctors come the fuck on
>>
Should PhDs be called doctors?
>>
>>734158813
I have a bit of pressure in my right ear. I'm just getting off a cold, so is it safe to assume it's just fluid build up?
>>
>>734162526
i come to 4chan to surround myself with those clearly inferior to me bc it makes me feels gud
>>
>>734162631
never. not even once
>>
>>734161476
My prev psychiatrist dropped my insurance and went to cash only. She died of cancer 3 months later.
>>
Are you an internist or are you subspecialized like in cardio, GI, etc?
>>
I have either like a kidney stone or infection. I gotta go to the doctor, but I smoke weed. Should I mention it to my doc? I'm fat so it might be kidney shit from fat diabetes so I'm expecting bloodwork and a pisstest
>>
>>734162776
should went to cash only earlier then obviously
>>
>>734161769

nah, so many obese fucks now that 1 inch dongs are almost normal now

>>734161990
yeah, from taking some chemo for titty cancer. fucking horrifying. the lady had the worst luck ever

>>734162012
20 year old asian chick. I gave her my cell number and spilled my spaghetti. I don't know what I was thinking
>>
>>734158813
Do you have any black colleagues? Ever heard a patient refuse care for a doctor based off the doctor's race? Opinions?
>>
Which team is going to win the NBA Finals?
>>
>>734158813
>ask a 1st year premed biology major whatever
>>
>>734161655
>prophylactically

So I should put it in my condom, doctor?
>>
>>734162899
not so many black docs.

this is for many reasons- probably because their iq is lower in general.

tons of jews though
>>
>>734158813
Are women in medical school treated not as seriously as the male students? And do you have any opinions on combined BA/MD programs instead of the tradition 4 year of undergrad and 4 years of med school?
>>
>>734162950
>my condom


>2017
>still believing the safesex jew
>>
>>734162950
by mouth u idiot.

by mouth, i think its like 300mg twice a day or something. idk look it up
>>
>>734161990
Not OP but I worked in a burn center and one of my patients was a young girl with SJS who had progressed to TEN and was dead within a few days.
>>
>>734163020

They get called "nurse" all the time and get super triggered

It's great
>>
>>734162903
i crushed so many premeds in college.

bahahahaha feelz gud

(spoiler alert. ur not good enough to make it)
>>
Opinion of male nurses? Also what's the nastiest shit you seen sofar
>>
>>734163020
combined md/ba's are garbage.

the one at my school ended thank jesus.

earn ur fuckin place in med school u spoiled bitches
>>
>>734163191
>have a doctorate already
>not concerned about making it
>try again lol
>>
>>734162590
>and obviously dentists aren't doctors come the fuck on

I think the title DDS makes you wrong there doctor. I have heard cardiologists say anesthesiologist aren't doctors, though. They laugh at them.
>>
>>734163249
too much nasty shit u really have no idea and never will.

male nurses are pretty rare. this is called a gender difference. get educated
>>
>>734162631
Only in academic settings. In public, never.
>>
anyone with a doctorate is a doctor. you fags know that physicians took the "doctor" title from scientist phds to gain more respect after killing too many patients, right?
>>
>>734163322
Try me
>>
>>734163294
thats cuz anesthesiologists are barely doctors.

so what if people think dentists are doctors. the world's filled with flat earther morons too.
>>
>>734163414
lol

most phd's are so dumb and poor.
>>
>>734162013

what meds you take?
first try taking some tums or prevacid or do the usual anti-reflux stuff you can find on google

>>734162124
you can buy it off the street super easy

>>734162138
at one point you'll hit a plateau were studying more wont really benefit you much, and you'll have to accept not being the smartest person in the class anymore

>>734162348
I know a bunch of great D.O's. I'd trust them way more than I'd trust an M.D. from a Caribbean school or from another foreign country

>>734162526
i've been here since college in 2006, so yeah old habit.
I wanted to be a pediatrician at first. That wouldve been the biggest mistake of my life.
I'm a resident but will be a big-boy attending next month.
>>
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>>734158813
hey im a first year uni student and my dream is to become a surgeon.
if i dont make the top 10% of my course i wont make it to med school.

Im thinking of teaching myself and practising surgery illegally in a back water 3rd world country if i dont make it - how would i go about doing this
>>
>>734163414
I did not know that
Link?
>>
>>734160201
So you're a GP.
What third-tier toilet did you graduate from?
>>
i should come here frequently and give free med advice.

anyone got somethin?
>>
>>734163531
join an ngo u idiot.

ezmode
>>
>>734161072
>300k a year
How does it feel to know some guy who bought a welding machine is making more then you out on a pipeline?
>$150 an hour
>84 hours a week
>overtime makes it 128 paid hours
>655k a year
>>
>>734163495
phds are just highly specialized in one particular area. doesn't mean they're "dumb." although there are certainly dumb people in any field.

>>734163552
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doctor_(title)
It's not something that requires a research paper as a link, lol. I mean it's pretty common knowledge. "Doctor" was a title for people earning a doctorate, way before "MD" was ever a thing.
>>
>>734158813
Why didn't you grow a pair and join the fucking Marines you faggot you were at prime enlisting age when the towers fell answer me
>>
Another thread by a dick MD.
>>
>>734163739
Sorry I did the calculator wrong. Its 957k a year and 596k after taxes
>>
>>734163739
LOLOPLPOLPOLPOL

#1 u want me to be jealous of a factory worker? LOPLPOLOLPOL

#2 $150 an hour?? 300k a year?? BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA loplpolpolopl polOPLOPLOPLPOLOPL

i have my own fuckinng steam room u think i get that from 150 an hour?

my yelp delivery costs clock in moar than that u pleb

lol fuckin welder. hows that gonna work at a bar?

"I weld. I make 300k" BAHHAAHAHAHAH
>>
>>734163739
not op but..
>84 hours a week

I mean, have fun killing yourself before you can spend any money or enjoy life. smh
>>
>>734163739
That guy works in the shithole of the world and goes blind in under 10 years. Most rig welders stop their job after an average of 3 years... and they aren't making 150 an hour... maybe the top .05%
>>
>>734163891
get paid get laid mang

twin towers did wut?
>>
>>734163704
fuck that shit.
all i see with ngo's are a bunch of people making themselves feel better with the suffering of others
>>
>>734160151
Don't you get put on a list or some shit and can't get jobs and live a normal life after admitting suicidal?
>>
>>734163876
Physicians know medicine. Most are idiots about everything else.

Prime example: Ben Carson
>>
>>734164036
yeah, in the states it's called "residency"

get real dude
>>
>>734162701

it's probably just fluid build up. Unless you're having fevers or severe pain then just man through it and take a Tylenol
>>734162799
internist

>>734162830
your doc wont give a shit unless he's like, a mormon or a radical muslim or something. They'll take your piss but they won't screen for drugs unless you ask for opiates

>>734162899
yeah I have black colleagues. They can either be super bro and smart or super shit and retarded. There's like, no in-between, it's weird. Patient's refuse care for all kinds of shit, so yeah

>>734162902
GSW. They basically have the US olympic team right now

>>734163020
females in med school are treated equally from what I've seen. But there's always going to be some feminist that complains about everything and thinks her problems are unique to herself. Call them a nurse and they'll go apeshit, it's awsome.
>>
I want to be a doctor. Where should I apply?
Like what's the process
Serious question btw
>>
>>734164076
no. that shit's classified mang.

no one will ever know. ever. like, no one.

trust me
>>
>>734164257
dont. throw in the towel.

serious answer btw. real serious
>>
>>734164151
>Physicians know medicine. Most are idiots about everything else.


I wouldn't disagree. This applies to people in general. Even successful people just get highly trained and competent in one particular area, but have 0 intellectual curiosity or pursuits beyond that.

There aren't a lot of genuinely intelligent, thoughtful people out there - whether we're talking about physicians or McDonald's employees. Although an intelligent person is more than likely not settling for being a fry cook.
>>
>>734164257
>Where should I apply?

I suggest you apply at McDonald's.
>>
>>734164151
>calling Ben carson retarded on 4chan

He separated baby siamese twins
Ran for president and was front runner for a time
Secretary of HUD found $500bn of errors in his first month

Your the retard
>>
>>734164199
is there another way of becoming a doctor other than going through residency?
>>
Could I get into med school graduating from UW with a 3.7 in chemical engineering?
>>
>>734164151
i know more than u about most things.

thats what having a higher iq means.

Prime example of a fallacy: generalizing from a case
>>
>>734164712
Yea earn a PhD at university
Take up communication as a major is easy peasy
>>
>>734158813
If you're actually a doctor...

I "sprained" my ankle pretty bad about 7-8 months ago, by slipping off the edge of a raised sidewalk. I was wearing flip flops like a retard, landed on it in a bad way.

I quickly realized it wasn't sprained, and here we are months later.. I can walk on it but it's painful sometimes, it doesn't have the same range of motion it used to, painful when I turn my foot the wrong way etc..

Is there even anything to do about this? A fucked up cuboid bone or something?
>>
>>734164289
I don't.. my dad lost security clearance after seeing a psychologist for depression.. so you're obviously a huge lying fuck trying to just get me to give you fucks my money for treatment
>>
>>734164741
uw is a fantastic school. 3.7 is fine.

get good mcat, rec letters, be FUCKING INTERESTING ffs in ur personal statement.

and if u bore me during the interview i will red flag ur ass real quick

(bonus points if ur a hot asian)
>>
>>73416481
as in a medical doctor?
>>
How do I manipulate my insurance company into paying for gynecomastia surgery?
>>
>>734164741
Of course. I got in and earned a 2.8 from Bob Jones.
>>
Since you basically have unlimited funds have you ever considered getting into the sport of skydiving?
>>
>>734164839
lol u schizophrenic?
>>
>>734158813
Op, i cant pee. I take like 10 min to pee and its super frustrating, im sure its not that im embarased to pee when people are around cause it happends whrn im alone at home too. I smoke drink and sometimes do some weed. Can any of those 3 cause this?
>>
Question about your monies

Most 'rich' thing you bought/did since becoming rich
>>
What are the odds that my cousin with Asperger's and rage issues will murder his family?
>>
>>734164712
u become a doctor through med school idiot

residency is to get licensed to practice medicine
>>
>>734164870
Well I'm half asian. have crohns disease and my dad died of a heart attack when I was 13. Grew up overseas since he was a foreign service officer. Lived tons of places, saw tons of fucked up shit from starvation in Ethiopia to civil war in Peru. Going through all this shit made me really want to help people... I love the outdoors, am an amateur placing skier and sport climber. My greatest skill is teamwork, and I'm a natural leader and have the greatest organizational skills and resourcefulness I know of. I DO have two MIPs though. How can I not be boring lol and will this shit effect me at all?

Also might be able to get a rec letter from the neuroscience head at university of Chicago, is that decent?
>>
>>734164954
no just paranoid after a doctor prescribed me the wrong meds once and almost killed me. Ended up hospitalized for a week and he never admitted he fucked up.
>>
What are the potential medical consequences of killing myself?
>>
>>734165312
what meds?
>>
>>734164915
HEHEHEHAHAHAhahheheheHEHEHAHAH soooo fannnnyyyyyy
>>
>>734165312
ooh tell me moar. wut he give u give me a hint
>>
>>734165350

cant think of any
>>
>>734165367
judging by your response this seems like a common occurrence.. what the fuck man
>>
>>734160151
And they give you a spinal tap, treat you like an infant, then release you with a few hundred dollars in debt, good luck!
>>
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>>734165259
I can weave lies on the internet as well
>>
>>734165621
well, I'll humor you, assume I'm telling the truth, give me some advice. Are you saying my interviewer wouldn't believe me? I'd have to bring pictures? My dad's service awards? dafuq?
>>
>>734163249

male nurses can be cool or shitty, idk, gender doesnt really matter in our world. Really the only specialties were gender actually means something is OBGYN and Orthosurg

Nastiest shit: huge diabetic ulcers do it for me. I can never get used to the smell of that decaying flesh

>>734163565
from a top-15 med school. Enjoy your call weeks, fag

>>734163739
300k/year but I only work every other week. I'm off for 7 days in between

>>734164833
just look for physical therapy ankle xercises on youtube. There, I saved you $200

>>734164839
places will ask about past medical history or meds you take during an employment physical. But you don't have to be honest with them. Hell, I'm on an SSRI for depression but my employer will never know that

>>734164896
lol u got tits

>>734164917
nah I've never been an adrenaline junkie. I'm happy with weed and prostitutes, thank you very much

>>734164986
how old are you? it could be your prostate, it could be some other obstruction in your urinary tract

>>734165063
went to Vegas and got two girls to do a 3way with me. It was okay, I guess. Not as exciting as porn makes it to be

>>734165073
honestly? pretty fucking low. The vast majority of aspies just keep to themselves
>>
>>734164986
Could be your prostate mang.
>>
>>734165616

>spinal tapping a psych admit
>>
>>734165259
half asian? dont care

crohn's? dont care

dad died of heart attack at 13? maybe a quick sentence might be useful but if u drone on i will ask you for a secondary application, charge u 100 bucks, and throw it in the fucking trash

grew up overseas and all that shit? thats potentially good stuff. say all that shit but dont fuck it up. make it interesting and ffs, EVERYONE LOVES TO LEARN so throw something in there that's interesting and makes me go "well ahh sheeeittt i didnt know that how interesting. maybe i'll throw this kid a bone bc his personal statement didnt make me want to slit my wrists."

u want to help people? so fuckin cliche but obligatory so a couple sentences there is mandatory

outdoors? amateur placing skier and sport climber? YOU BETTER GODDAMN BELIEVE WE LOVE THAT SHIT. thats in all caps boi so im serious. we love love love that shit. u know how many marathon runners, olympic athletes and the like are in med school???? well do u? do u? A SHITTON

dont give me that natural leader /organization skills/resourcefulness shit. hard to SAY that stuff but it will SHOW in the rest of ur app.

ur MIPs may be problematic... like seriously so. not a deal breaker but definitely something u have to explain.

rec letter from neurosci head at u chi? LOLOL. that sounds mediocre. a fantastic LOR is absolutely the fucking BASELINE son. everyone has a letter from trump deez days.
>>
>>734165867
lying gets you fuckign fired though, are you giving me shitty advice?
>>
is it bad to drink a pint of whiskey while having the flu?
i think i'm feeling sick again
>>
>>734166039
thats not common. like at all so someone got rekt or neurosyphilis which is the same thing
>>
>>734166039
rule out meningitis-related psychosis?
>>
>>734164289
Dude I lost my job because the insurance agent from Prudential released my medical records. I know its protected information but it still happens.
>>
>>734166058
how the fuck do I get a good LOR then? Who from? currently at UW, any suggestions? What if my MIPs are sealed and dropped?

What should the rest of my app look like?
>>
>>734166250
alcohol suppresses the immune system.

u deserve a fuckin darwin award if u dont know that by now
>>
>>734166250
it can help... have you ever read Robinson Crusoe? Guy literally cured all his shit with whiskey and tobacco lmao
>>
>>734166432

so am i gonna die?
>>
>>734158813
About to get my masters in Psychology with a specialization in research. DO physicians or other doctors look down on this?
>>
>>734166465
malaria was treated with gin and tonics

the quinine in the tonic is what a lot of our antimalarials are based on.

pleb
>>
Hey doc

Do you believe in the Christian God? Or has your education blinded you
>>
>>734166551
I'm poli sci
Motherfucker I look down on you
>>
>>734166551
yes. 100%

the social sciences including psychology is in the fucking toilet and u psych d's deserve to go to hell.

OR, practice in the field of psychology for the rest of ur life which is EXACTLY the same thing as hell
>>
>>734166465

that guy who got lost alone in a desolated island?
>>
>>734166517
if there's any justice in the world. yes
>>
>>734166517
>so am i gonna die?
Yes. Sooner or later.
>>
>>734166581
most docs are conservative and they are more religious than the general population u fucking retarded pleb monkey
>>
>>734158813
What typeof doctor are you?
>>
>>734166671
Coming from another Poli Sci, we look down on everyone, even ourselves. We're the shit that says the ass stinks.
>>
>>734166570
he didn't have malaria, and I said whiskey you retarded fuck

everyone knows about the legionnaires and their quinine
>>
>>734166735
yes, desolated.
>>
>>734158813
this isn't funny why does it have so many replies
>>
>>734166965
Haha never thought about it but you are 100 percent right
>>
>>734158813
Has someone ever died because of your mistakes?
Does it haunt you?
>>
>>734158813
how do you lie to a doctor to get a prescription you want? Just state the symptoms in a believable way and hope it works out? I'm not ballsy enough to try it, just curious.
>>
>>734167438
im so jaded people dying does nothing to me. this is the case with most doctors.

sometimes, i'm actually relieved because they were in a superfucked state and/or i'm kinda tired and would like a sandwich
>>
>>734167546
depends on the script, depends on the doc, depends on the pharmacy
>>
>>734166465
He also had divine intervention on his side, though
>>
>>734167351
I'm at University of Memphis, really only picked the major because the Pre Law program is non-existent, looking into getting into Litigation, what are your plans?
>>
>>734167580
That's slightly worrying, but did the first deaths mess you up? Have you gotten over them?
>>
>>734167580

fucking this

the only death that fucked me up so far was some 2 year old kid that came into the ER after he apparently died in his sleep. Fuck, you're just not the same after you hear a mother crying over her dead toddler
>>
>>734167632
We all do if we believe. Duh.

very surprised of the criticisms avoiding the fact it was a completely fictitious story lmao
>>
>>734167773
yes, like most major events the first time(s) are the roughest.

then, literally beginning in med school, u dont even notice the paralyzed 20 year old in the corner with the familiy fresh off the plane from the east coast to say goodbye before we pull the plug.

and u can't wait for happy hour
>>
>>734167859
think about those cops that found the baby in the crackhead family's microwave
>>
Hey doc, do you give family members and close friends a free surgery if they cant afford one?
>>
>>734158813
Serious question, I am a 18 yo junior(failed 1st grade)
Is there somwthing I could do to help my chances to get into a med school as a high schooler?
>>
>>734167859
i totes agree with this.

the most fucked moments for me emotionally are probably when moms have to bury their children.

it's never ok.

unless they're severely deformed or cretinous- then they should be aborted stat
>>
>>734166307
it actually depends on whether it's "willful" or not

if you're committed against your will, which just means that you don't sign a document that says "i'm here willingly", then it becomes a matter of public record, i guess because they figure you must be nuts in a dangerous way

psych wards are bullshit anyways, i was put in one about 6 years ago by my psychiatrist when i was suicidal, because he said, explicitly, "if you don't go willingly, i'll have you committed", so i went there, for two goddamn weeks, and i can honestly say it was one of the most unhelpful, painful things i've ever had to go through

there was NOTHING to do, it was two weeks of sensory deprivation, and you've being tossed around like a lab rat, and everyone expects you to open up and tell your life story to a dozen different doctors, barring the fact that you're incredibly introverted and socially anxious and don't know how to talk about yourself, and the whole thing costed me, literally 25 thousand motherfucking dollars, because i went "willingly". 25k all for people to physically restrain me from killing myself and putting me in prison. Psych wards are a fucking joke.
>>
>>734160657
how so? is there a time limit for how long you can study?
>>
>>734168070
dude you need to go to college first holy shit. maybe not if you have to ask questions like these lmfao.

age doesn't mean shit. wtf? your grades and accomplishment do... wtf?
>>
>>734168070
No one gives a shit about elementary school. Keep your gpa up, keep your career options open, and find a school that works for you.
>>
>>734168024

nah, it was actually a normal white family, which made it hit so close to home.

they probably found him choking on a whole foods bag or something
>>
>>734168163
fuck doctors

FUCK DOCTORS
>>
>>734168070
kill urself
>>
>>734168163

you're alive, right? you're welcome
>>
Dear medfag,

I donated a kidney 5 years ago now, and have chronic fucking pain on my left side. apparently the faggot fucking surgeon dislocated my rib on the table from the spine side of things.

if I cough or even fucking turn wrong it pops out and im literally dying of pain.

go to doctors

>they think im just hunting for meds
>show tons of xrays in different positions proving my rib dislocates/sublaxes and pops back in
>only option is surgery on the join near spine
>I don't wanna do that until im 50ish

How do I deal with the pain it is depressing and life altering.

p.s. im still functioning great because I have the motivation of michael jordan on adderal and have to work to make the moneys

please respond I don't know how pain management works
>>
What country do you practice in?
>>
>>734168362
i'd love to treat u in the ed.

i think u need to be made npo, dnr/dni, and a big fat catheter in ur wee wee...

oh, and did u say ur suicidal? let's get psych on board, put u on a hold and have u committed.

i think the room next to the smelly homeless paranoid schizophrenic ball fondler is available
>>
>>734168504
I've been contemplating suicide my whole life, but I'm still alive. Are you fucking stupid?
>>
>>734158813
why are u such an asshole sending late medication orders and making my job harder as a pharm tech??
>>
>>734168528
sue the piece of shit doctors.

FUCK DOCTORS what trash they are
>>
>>734168586
try ketamine or ect for refractory u dumbfuck. if that dont work kill urself
>>
>>734168528

idk, sounds painful. If it's as bad as you say I'd just get the surgery now. Otherwise, smoke weed and try some stretching/strengthening
>>
>>734168583
thanks for proving my point you piece of shit.

like, really?

lmfao
>>
>>734168654
pharm tech? plz dont open ur mouth
>>
>>734168735
*refractory depression
>>
>>734168586
what part of "you're welcome" did you not understand?
>>
>>734168735
got dosed at a concert and was in a k hole the whole day. if anything, I wanted to die more.
>>
>>734168771
currently doing stretching / strengthening but its like i said. I will literally cough and BOOOM or sneeze and boom...

This quack asian chiropractor taught me some streches to get it "seated" back in place works wonders but i just need something for the IMMEDIATE pain when it happens.
>>
>>734168932
well then, ect then it's get busy dying
>>
>>734168925
I wasn't that guy. You really are retarded and think people should die in wars for you for curing someones athletes foot. please die lmao
>>
>>734169037
I'd rather you did your fucking jobs and helped me instead of making it worse and charging me money I don't have. fuck you cunts.
>>
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>>734168528
LOL, U don't know how pain management works

but seriously?
This
>>734168677
and probably
this
>>734168771

shit sucks
>>
>>734169197
oh wait, u sound familiar all of a sudden.

yeah, cant help u and cash only have a good one
>>
>>734158813
Have a huge sex drive. I've had this lump on my balls; very small, like a pimple ready to burst. It hasn't grown, but leaves a sore feeling in my balls sometimes.

Not cancer right?
>>
>>734169003

i really dont have a clue, since pain isnt my specialty. Maybe a pain doc can inject something in that bundle of nerves to numb everything up for a while. I think they can do botox or something, idk
>>
>>734158813
Why can't I grow a beard? I'm 30. hwite male.
>>
>>734169289
thats an ez one.

u have fournier's gangrene. google images pics should look familiar
>>
>>734169289
pop it then post pics for a better diagnosis
>>
>>734169332
not enough androgen cuz ur beta

use a sharpie is ur best bet
>>
>>734169273
lol just keep discrediting yourself. some oath you too

goddamn psychopaths
>>
>>734169289
probably epididymitis. go see a doc faggot
>>
>>734169481
lol????


>>734169289
its probably a cyst. is it ON your ball, or just in the skin/ballsack?
>>
>>734169527
that oath also says i should do abortioins but clearly ur existence proof of the need for them
>>
>>734169088

over 68% of active males suffer from athlete's foot at one point in their lives, and I make the difference between chronic suffering and their cure. If I want them to go to hop in a tank and go to war then fuck you I'm making them go to war. It's my right as a doctor
>>
Hey doc were you surprised to find out they cured Hep C? How much that cost?
>>
>>734169197
there are some incredible assholes in this thread, that aren't necessarily representative of the medical community as a whole. Most of them aren't doctors anyway.

But there's one tiny sliver of "good" advice, imo.

ECT as scary as it sounds, is one of the few treatments that shows promise for severely refractory major depressive individuals. There are side-effects, most of them are temporary. It won't turn you into a vegetable. Another promising related venue (that's still being tested/evaluated.... if you're into being a guinea pig) is fMRI (functional MRI) that uses lower-level magnetic pulses. Few to zero side effects, but you'd have to find a research study in your area.

Do some research, you may still find something out there useful, in possibly a different direction than you were looking.
>>
>>734169679
I had It as a kid for years... doctors gave me creams and pills and shit costing hundreds, never did anything...

started using vinegar when I became a teenager, and I've never had it since

fucking useless pieces of shit.
>>
>>734162013

OP here.

Sounds like late stage Mesothelioma. Sorry to say you're going to die.
>>
>>734169775

idk but it's fucking expensive. The insurancejews won't even pay for treatment until you go into severe liver failure or something, which makes no sense to me. I guess it's so expensive that they hope you die of something else that's unrelated before you start having complications of Hep C
>>
>>734169901
How do I know if I am a severely refractory major depressive individual?

Nobody knows how bad it is, since I grew up in a household where crying got you beat, to give you something to really cry about. But I have no motivation, am secretly completely apathetic, and consider suicide at least once a day. I function and am more capable of 90% of my peers, but I would be magnitudes more capable if I was normal...
>>
>>734169938

you obviously just had a delayed reaction to the medications.

you're welcome, but keep thinking vinegar cured you if it makes you feel better
>>
>>734162631
I had a bitch ass principal that had his PHD in education and you'd get detention if you didn't address that fucker as "Doctor."
>>
>>734169901
I'm just extremely concerned about the impact of being labeled and treated will have on my professional life... So many stories of medical records being released somehow and people getting axed... some of the best coworkers too...
>>
>>734170296
a delayed reaction of YEARS? after not taking it for all those YEARS?

You're absolutely retarded. I just had a weak immune system as a kid and these antibiotics further surpassed it. Getting off them and growing up strengthened it.
>>
>>734160151
As a slacking psychiatric resident, I hate you
>>
>>734170363

that reminds me of a patient I had who had a PhD in some bullshit non-medical field back in Nigeria or something and insisted everyone, including me, called him "doctor". People are insufferable sometimes.
>>
>>734158813
I've been having difficulty writing for about two years now and I don't mean writer's block I mean the physical of action of writing. It just happened with no warning one day and never went away in fact it's been slowly getting worse if anything.
Any advice?
>>
>>734170645
huh?
>>
>>734158813
1.should i go for a testicular prosthesis i had an orchiectomy back in February.
2.whats some advice youd give to someone in their sophomore year of college i fucked up alot in freshmen year but it didn't count against my gpa for the forgiveness policy now i really wanna get my shit on track and would really appreciate the advice.
3. how can i get some form of medical work now i wanna do something since volunteering isnt paying.
>>
>>734170582

>a delayed reaction of YEARS? after not taking it for all those YEARS?

Yes. Who's the one who graduated from med school? Oh, right. Me.

you're welcome
>>
>>734170743

Lou-Gherrigs disease. You're fucked.
>>
>>734170656
usually doctors. self entitled narcissistic sociopaths.
>>
>>734170872
yeah I like all those sources you cited. too bad a fucking dermatologist told me this shit, and I doubt thats your specialization, so I'm pretty sure you're fucking full of shit.


Had allergies as a kid, never took anything for them. Eventually went away. I'm sure you guys cured those too, right?
>>
>>734170810
1. sounds cool, chicks like big balls

2. Adderall

3. medical work without a degree? Idk, lab tech maybe
>>
>>734170363
Same with me with a middlemschool english teacher. Fuckin fags arent doctors
>>
>>734170778
Don't fucking lie about your symptoms just to see a psychiatrist! We are busy taking care of actually crazy people, take your worries well friends to a general practice doctor for meds until they can see an outpatient psychiatrist
>>
>>734171009

>yeah I like all those sources you cited. too bad a fucking dermatologist told me this shit, and I doubt thats your specialization, so I'm pretty sure you're fucking full of shit

I'm a doctor so I'm allowed to source myself as an expert consult

>Had allergies as a kid, never took anything for them. Eventually went away. I'm sure you guys cured those too, right?

Yes.

You're welcome.
>>
>>734170810
what the fuck is this wonderful sounding magical forgiveness policy?? what kind of fucking magical fairy tail world do you live in?
>>
How do you feel about DOs? NDs? NPs?
>>
>>734170656
>>734171272
Right? If he went about it the right way, I would have respected that. No. His bitch ass gave out detention for a single infraction.
>>
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>>734158813
Can you give me a quick-rundown on schizophrenia?
>>
>>734171479
oh I see. Too busy ruining the lives and reputations of the depressed, making them feel belittled like five year olds who can't be left alone. haha right.
>>
>>734171480
that would be fine if there actually were sources out there. stupid lying cunt
>>
>>734171680
YEs sir, you have it.
>>
>>734171550
here in NYC your freshmen year of college any classes you fail arent counted towards your gpa or acknowledged on your transcript this only applies to your freshmen year. but keep in mind with certain grades excluded your gpa will be the amount of classes factored meaning it will be super high or garbage because its only accounting for two classes minimum which puts you at big risk of probation early
>>
>>734171692
No, you just shouldn't lie to bump yourself up in triage, it's selfish. You have a bad interaction with a psychiatrist, anon? You wanna talk about it?
>>
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>>734169627
>epididymitis


On my ball, not the ballsack. It's sore if i rub it.
>>
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>>734171824
>you have it.
What makes you so sure?
>>
>>734171932
Yes... My dad died when I was a sophomore in high school Mom was abusive. Told school counselor about two years later I was sad all the time, never happy, lacked motivation. Got sent to a juvenile center. Shit was scary, force feeding people, meds making people crazy, very mean and forceful nurses. Had a breakdown. They put me in a padded room and the nurses would laugh at me. Got charged about 3000$ without my knowledge, but my mom got the bill, then kicked me out because of it. Kept my mouth shut after that. Was severely depressed for another 12 years. Eventually got a decent job but still depressed. Decided to seek help again, asked if I ever thought about suicide, said yes, asked how I'd do it, said I'd probably jump off a bridge or something, was forced to be committed, but didn't want to go again so I fought it, and because of that I was labelled some shit and HR found out, I got let go. One year later of working minimum wage and here I am.
>>
>>734172098
just kidding. do you hear voices or some shit?
>>
>>734172397
That genuinely sucks, anon. I'm sorry that you've had such bad run ins with mental health. What would you have wanted us to do differently?
>>
>>734172397
Yeah my shrink told me most people at sometimes think about suicide, but they dont take it seriously until the person tells them how they'd actually carry it out when asked.
>>
>>734171258
you mean like when you wanna study or regularly on the adderall
>>
>>734173047
Maybe not ruin my life multiple times? lol... Maybe give actual treatment at these institutions? Have oversight, and decent human beings in charge? Treat depression with discretion? Why are things so shitty? If you actually care about helping people then props, but why are these so many fucked up money hungry retards in the business? Just because mentally unstable people are easy to take advantage of?
>>
Hey op I got into a 3 year program and straight into internal med residency after that (usa). I really like the er but thought I could fine my place in IM or some subspeciality. All my shadowing experience was in the er and I really like the hours and their ability to stabilize and do just about anything. Will I get over it? Why IM and are u going to subspecialize? I'm thinking just being a hospitalised but I'm not sure I like the 7 to 7. Saving a year time and tuition is so boss how could I give that up
>>
dr.stark?
>>
secrets to healthy life

is bodybuilding to a moderate degree healthy?
>>
>>734173208
Psych resident here. This is the thing, if you say 'yes I am thinking of killing myself and this is how' we have the obligation to admit you because you pose a risk to yourself. If you say 'yeah I fantasize about killing myself and this is how I would do it but really I never would because...' then we don't have to force you to come in. It's shitty, I hate forcing people to be admitted when my gut tells me that they will be fine
>>
>>734173532
What was your undergrad? What school? What program is this and what was your gpa and credentials to get in? would love some insight into what it takes to follow this path
>>
>>734173403
You get billed for medical care, welcome to America. You had a bad experience and that sucks, but we didn't get you kicked out of your house and we didn't get your job taken from you. Laws protect health information like crazy.
>>
>>734173683
so why do it? just to cover your ass? isn't that a little selfish?
>>
>>734174003
well apparently not like crazy enough. nothing protected me
>>
>>734174254
How do you think your job found out about it?
>>
>>734174013
Wouldn't it be more selfish if someone came in and I let them go and he killed himself because I went with my gut?
>>
>>734173960
Literal bellcurve average mcat. 3.5ish gpa and applied to the school I got into as an instate. You get a second interview after you write a an essay. Interviewed well because I was interested and a normal functioning human. On interview day their are so many turbo autists you wouldn't believe. Lots of cockiness as well which is a major turn off. I don't think I did anything specific. Every year in undergrad I did research , participated in a club, and had a stacked academic schedule. Throw in some med school summer enrichment programs and a short summer of shadowing and I got in. I was always busy and my grades were always good, not amazing but good. For many schools that was enough.
>>
>>734158813
Ever go fishing?
>>
>>734174552
Not him but my boss found out because the dude from prudential told him about my prescription for paxil because our companies prescription plan was being changed.
>>
>>734174776
The best and brightest....how about..
"Good enough"... 'murica!
>>
>>734164257
write a resume and check on craigslist
>>
>>734174776
cool, thanks! did you have enough time for a social life?
>>
>>734174966
Super super brainy types have their place in neuro, radiology, and derm and whatnot but people with more people skills I think for better in many specialties.
Whole big world out their buddy
>>
>>734174966
he stilll had to make it through med school and residency you fuckwit. Most countries only require 4 years of college. lmfao.
>>
Why do bong rips give me intense headaches the day after?
>>
>>734175187
During undergrad? No because of my nature and also due to stem majors in general. But in retrospect I did ok. During mcat study? Abandon ship. I had to retake it and was basically a year of my life not going out or anything studying 7 days straight. It's less that the material is hard but the further you go on, it gets very depressing so you sort of snowball into inefficient studying.
>>
>>734174671
Yeah I guess you've thought it all the way through and done some planning if you can tell the doctor how you'd do it
>>
>>734175436
how many vaginas have you seen in this job? tell story of best one.
>>
>>734174908
Sounds like you have a good lawsuit against your insurance company, not the mental health staff
>>
Is there any truth to the whole smoking weed and not going into REM 3 and 4 even though u get a long sound sleep? Is 9 hrs on this sleep worse than 6-7 normally?
>>
>>734158813
What's the best way to get pain meds with nothing actually wrong
>>
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My left heel has hurt for the past 10 or 12 years. Every minute of every day. I've done pediatrists, bone scans, stretching, steroids, you name it. Finally I gave up because I got tired of paying doctors for referrals and no results. Do I have any other recourse?
>>
>>734175759
I know but ultimately that would just lead to more people knowing about my private info
>>
Have you heard of myofascial pain syndrome? I have had chronic shoulder pain for 4 years and TPI is helping but does this type of thing ever go away?
>>
>>734158813
I have a hard time dealing with anxiety in my pre-med degree. All my friends know I can make it and think I'm smart, but I feel a bit terrified of how anxiety might affect me in med school. How do you deal with stress?
>>
>>734175905
Acupuncture.
>>
>>734169273
>all of a sudden
>says he's "smarter than u in most things"
>>
>>734158813
how do I stop procrastinating? I'm on a 10 day streak of doing nothing productive. Yesterday alone, I spent 13-14 hours in the same thread on /a/
>>
>>734164657
*you're
>>
>>734175698

not him but:

>doing a pap smear on this cute 20-something Korean chick
>perfectly shaved
>trying to put the speculum in
>having trouble because its tight as fuck, even with the smallest speculum
>she starts getting wet as fuck
>I have to constantly ask the M.A. to hand me more gauze because her wetness keeps obstructing my view

ive been looking for an asian girlfriend since
Thread posts: 288
Thread images: 9


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