we nerf each other's superpowers being able to talk to animals

>>733941306

but they all ignore you.

being able to turn any man gay

>>733941366
You are still ugly, and they all ignore you

>>733941410

>still ugly

but im not

>>733941455
But you are

>xray vision

>>733941455
>but im not
lmao

>>733941455
Them show us a pic

>>733941410
name a superpower faggot

can walk on water

>>733941569
but only through air

can speak every existing language

>>733941366
But they revert back to a hyper-masculine state after 48 hours.

Being able to comprehend any text just by flipping through it.

>>733941569
You can only see through the clothes of people with the same gender as you

>super strength

>>733941603
>can walk on water
sea creatures want you dead

>>733941603
but not on land
can become invisible

>>733941582

why bother, even if i did you'd claim i was ugly any way

>>733941680

>but they revert back in 48 hours

nigga i only need about half an hour to have my way with them.

>>733941672
>can speak every existing language
cant understand what is spoken/written to you

>>733941680
But it takes a lengthy process and you must devote an appropriate amount of hours

Being able to be any body size you want.

>>733941672
Can only say im a huge fag in those languages

can teleport

The abilty to summon popcorn

>>733941732
but become visible when someone is within a 10 meter radius from you

can see the future

If i control over gravity, what be something that can best - total manipulation of gravity.

>>733941709
can't turn it off
>be able to fly

>>733941709

>But it only activates when lifting things you would be able to easily lift without the power

>>733941845
only 1 foot off the ground and at walking speed

>>733941672
But only using slang
Super Speed

>>733941818
but 4 feet in any direction

>>733941828
>can see the future
cant see the present

breathe underwater

https://youtu.be/BBOKO83-zLA

>>733941672
But only if the other person doesn't speak that language

Here's mine
> time manipulation

>>733941828
only show your death
>be a hot futanari

>>733941818
Only 7 feet in front of you

power to stop time

>>733941828
>can see the future
all info gained is insignificant

super speed

>>733941672
You have the shittiest accent in each language making you sound like a foreigner in all of them (including your native tongue)

Telepathy

>>733941845
Your max speed is ten feet per hour

>laser eyes

>>733941962
can't start again
power to kill people with mind

>>733941926
can't breathe air

I can change my voice pitch any time

>>733941822
Its always stale

>>733942013
>laser eyes
people ask you nonstop about your laser eye surgery and where you got it

>>733941977
telepathic images are narrated by Hillary Clinton.....nude.

>>733941977
every one hates you
>make people extremely horny

>>733942022
bot only yourself

can unnerf any superpower

>>733942042
You can't sing for shit

>can pull literally anything out from behind my back

>>733942022
only those you care about

power to control elements

>>733942022
Can only kill children

Ability to phase through objects

>>733942133
win win

>>733942130
but only the opposite sex

can breathe methane

>>733942042
You will always talk in a pitch that is either way too high or too low.

Being able to control the elements

>>733942133
>can unnerf any superpower

Only when a cock is in your ass

>>733941822
Only when your dick is in a knot

>>733941816

>But you don't get to choose when you change size

Being able to read people's minds

>>733942130
only ugly people of the same sex

>shape shifting

>>733942162
You have a really bad migraine that lasts for over an hour after going through an object

>super speed

>>733942022
Your name is carved into their chest and it looks like murder

>>733942022
How is this a nerf? That would be fantastic

>>733942189
only methane
>can't be arrested

>>733942149

but you can feel it coming out of your ass.

the power to create legal american money from thin air.

>>733942247
>size doesnt change

>>733942212
but they will kill you

super sight

>>733942266
cant commit any crimes

>>733942266
but can be shot

super jump

>>733942189
>but only the opposite sex

...where's the nerf?

>>733942304
you'd cause inflation

>you live forever

>>733942353
can't land without shattering your legs

ability to doge anything thrown/shot at you

>>733942341
but can't do any good either


can make children stop crying

>>733942266
Police shoot on sight

>can change skin and hair color at will

>>733942402
>don't
as a 90 year old

>>733942353
legs fuck up when back to the ground
>infinite boner

>>733941912
You become frictionless randomly for 1 minute while in super speed

>>733942402
but you can never love

you can manipulate probability

>>733942251
Only with a 9 inch dildo up your ass

Being able to breath fire

>>733942402

>you'd cause inflation

not really, one person living reasonably would not cause inflation.

>>733942433
can't move unless shot at


ability to make my dick go from 1inch to 12 in an instant

>>733942402
Can't leave the hospital where you were born

You never smell bad

>>733942478
But only giving yourself a disadvantage

Being able to talk to animals

>>733942312
Can only see the world in individual atoms

Immortality in the physical state I'm in now, but I can willingly end my consciousness whenever I will it.

>>733941672
but only in a scottish accent.

>>733941977
Your telepathy functions like your hearing does; you can't turn it off. If you're in a crowd of 100 people it's like 100 people shouting at you all the time and you can't stop it.

Super intelligence.

>>733942557

Your gay

>>733942572
you never smell good

can create rare pepes at any time

>>733941306
> Them not listening or responding

>>733941975
Only if while you are getting a blumpkin

>>733942478
But only to cause yourself personal loss

Can grow limbs and organs back at an extremely accelerated rate

>>733942572

But you have to shower every 12 hours

Can time travel

>>733942304
But only 100 dollars a day

amazing reaction time

>>733942557
But effects dont work when erect

Ability to make others shit themselves

>>733942579
bug not until you reach your 100000000th birthday

>>733942638
pepe meme dies

>>733942585

Severe Autism and OCD

Can manipulate molecules to boil water with my mind

>>733942682

thats still 36 thousand dollars a year.

>>733942698
But only when you shit yourself

Every post you make gets quints

>>733942698
only on may 8th

ability to see

>>733942758
^

>>733942649
though not where you lost them

telekinesis

>>733942467
Can never cum

>You are not effected by fire at all, no pain, no damage.

>>733942698
but you shit yourself too


ability to shoot diamond shards out of my asshole

>>733942823
But the diamonds are larger than your asshole.

Being able to teleport.

>>733942816
but you still die from it


can run super fast and stop at will

>>733942794
to see nothing
>ability to kill myself

>>733942823
But you have bad hemriods

Walk through walls

>>733942780

But no one ever reads your post because of it

Breathe underwater

>>733942890
But only to New Jersey.

Ability to coerce anybody to do what you want.

>>733942449
Always a nigger

>>733942682
you can only use it 1 second after getting hit

can kill all other races besides whites

>>733942823
Diamond shards have to first go through your intestines first effectively shredding them up

The ability to instantly become a pro at any video game you play

>>733942927
only underwater
>ability to live in peace

>>733942905
but all attempts fail


ability to make my breath not stink on command

File: 1491576301137.jpg (38KB, 657x527px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 657x527px

>>733942934
WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT JERSEY?

>>733942903
But only while in quicksand.

Being able to stop and restart time at will for everyone but you.

>>733942964
But only games on the dreamcast

The ability to seduce anyone

>>733942917
but only if the door is open

able to guess anyone's password

>>733942964
u can only play games for little girls

pyrokinesis

>>733942964
but only mobile games
can make my hair be any color

>>733942934
You only want to be kicked in the balls.
Probability manipulation

Cock grows larger every time you sneeze. Can't be reversed.

>>733941306
can only ever talk in woofs, grunts and squeeks

>>733942682
You react so fast, you tear your tendons with every reflexive action.

Ability to move my body instantaneously in 3d space without the effects of inertia, momentum, or friction. But any organic material in my path feels the full effects.

>>733943064
But everything you seduce tries to kill you after sex


The ability to grant wishes

>>733943064
That your related to

frost breath

>>733943013
in command of others
>only need to shit once a year on a "poop day"

>>733942959

Entire humanity become mixed race and whites die out

Can become high as fuck at will as if on any drug choosen

>>733942794
>ability to see
but not hear

can repair anything

>>733942823
They always disintegrate into carbon atoms immediately upon exit

>The power to turn water into H2O

>>733943124
but only for a 10th of a second

ability to turn shit to gold

>>733943087
But you can only manipulate it in ways that inconvenience you.

Ability to transform into any animal.

>>733942903
>no damage
>can still die
How?

You are only fast when compared to a snail :^)

>Ability to land a fall from any height gently

>>733943143
always active
>jedi powers

>>733943164
only drug is cheesing

impregnate any bitch i want

>>733943156
you need to shit in that day for all the days of the year


can resize myself at will

>>733943106
Can't stop sneezing.

>>733942917

But only next to unlocked doors or openings in the wall

Can see full spectrum, including UV, xray, gamma, etc...

File: hormittu popol.png (260KB, 350x438px) Image search: [Google]

260KB, 350x438px

>>733942042
the pitch will fluctuate and always cause voice cracks

>ability to see where anybody is and what theyre doing

>>733943156
poop for entire day but the log has a 50 cm circumference
>The ability to die at any time you want

>>733943143
Only when you drink liquid nitrogen which freezes your innards

>>733943190
anything that has no function.

>Can control gravity.

>>733943106
>Cock grows larger every time you sneeze. Can't be reversed.

Comes with a severe pollen allergy

>>733943250
>Ability to land a fall from any height gently
Fall Really slow

Powers of resurrection

>>733943261
Like the jedi, you are foreveralone.jpg

Ability to eat Cheetos and other similar snacks without getting the powdery residue on your fingers.

>>733943143
All food you eat is now cold

The ability to conjure food out of nowhere

>>733943239
Can't turn human.

>>733943289
mass still the same
>have the powers of thor

>>733943314
But they are only identifiable from a fly that is unique to their location and only an egyptian man that is 195cm tall can Identify such fly
>the power to ejaculate string

>>733943370
the powder appears in your dick

>>733943200
the transformation can only happen in your colon.

10 dimensional senses.

>>733942581
top Kek, be the most potent semen in the world, capable of making Hitler's übermensch a reality.

>>733943010

>Only you believe this and everyone else wants to kill you

>>733943284
but you have to pay child support

can make food out of anything

>>733943284
not a downside

Child comes out autistic and sterile

Can squish heads of anyone I look at at will

>>733943370
Residue instead covers your face.

>>733943362
you can only resurrect retarded niggers

powers of death

>>733943284
They both die during childbirth

You become such a good driver that you never crash/ get in accidents

>>733943143
Only when blowing on beverages.

Ability to feel what any phallas shaped object is subjected to in any porno I watch.

>>733943442
but you have to eat it

>>733943362
Can only resurrect cokckroaches.

>the power of prophesy.

>>733943465
nobody wants to fuck you
>become sexy

>>733943415
but only in valhalla
can double jump irl

>>733943362
>Powers of resurrection
Years later, after everyone you knew and loved has died

>Power to make any statistic you say online true

>>733943448
>Literal dick cheese
Fucking kek

>>733942509
Your body is not immune to flames, meaning each time you do it you cause third degree burns to your mouth and esophagus.

Dimensional travel

>>733943584
but always land on your face

never sleep

>>733943584

Break ankles from falling every time

My index finger is a gun.

>>733943678
Still get tired.

Can cause rainstorms at will.

>>733943678
Can't live without sleep

>>733943678
die of exhaustion


can fap endlessly

>>733943603
nobody believes you
>every one believes in my lies

>>733943657
Only to dimensions you wouldn't want to travel to.

Ability to leave and forget about 4chan

>>733943452
2 dimensional brain

>All the powers of God.

>>733943722
but only above you
can erase time

>>733943710
It only fires when it's up your own ass.

>I can control technology with just a thought

>>733943584
Also take double fall damage.

>>733943722
can only be directed at people named Will. William, Guillaume, etc. dont count.

>>733943722
but they never stop
I am the best singer in the world

>>733943765
Your penis decreases in size by 75% and is more prone to bruising

>>733943710
but the bullet comes out of your finger, tearing off the tip

>>733943786
only numbers
>walk through flames

>>733943523
>powers of death
You fall over dead, wow great power

>ability to see perfectly fine in any amount of light

>>733943765

Can only fap other guys

Women find me irresistable

>>733943885
still feel the pain

can fly

>>733943765
never nuts

>>733943811
only parts you personally remember

super stealth

>>733943710
Uncontrollable urge to bite your nails.

>>733943892
blind


can make my mom love me ;-;

>>733943825

You control an onscreen curser than moves at the slowest speed

Can speak and read any language

>>733943973
Only when alone
don't need to breathe

>>733943200
But I can move instantaneously. 1/10 of a second is forever.

>>733943898
you're followed by a mob of women 24/7
can't get killed

>>733943561
You can only prophasize what unlikely events wont happen

>power to make any day a friday

>>733943973
You have to scream "I'm sneaking around!" every ten seconds

>>733944075
never born

>able to mend any wounds

>>733944075
become a vegetable at 90
Never age after 25

>>733943973
in nonvisible wavelengths

permanent good luck

>>733944143
but only minor flesh wounds

can make any woman orgasm

>>733943997
Faggot

>>733943786
Including yourself

>I don't have to breathe to stay alive

>>733944239
you become gay

>>733944200
When not taking risks
Allways get dubbs or better

>>733944145
dies at 24


can't get raped

>>733944075

Fall in a crevasse while hiking a remote untravelled location, never to be discovered again

Brain can access the internet at 1+Terrabyte speeds

>>733944200
is permanent in frienzone too
>spellcast

>>733944239
but only your mom feels it

>>733941818
you have a stroke when you reach your destination

>>733944298
Must say yes to everything
Allways get raped at 10pm by a person of your choosing

>>733944304
but you can only acces tumblr

can get laid

>>733944145
die at age 25

immune to all diseases in the universe

>>733944275
Instead your lungs need broken glass

>>733944275
you are constantly gasping

ability to control water in any form

>>733944298
it only applies to women

Able to mimic any voice

>>733944295
404 right after

>>733944239
But no woman will ever let you try

>no longer require food/water to live&maintain normal function

>>733944298
Cant get laid either

>Power to never get pulled over by cops

>>733944099
3 day cooldown and you only work on weekends

>>733944403
but you speak in latin
can make myself any height

The power to summon a cold cheeseburger once
The power to count to seven on a new thread on b, but it 404 before anyone sees it
The power to find nudes of anyone in existence, but it is only a 40x40 pixeos thumbnail

>>733943852
But don't discover this until you're extremely old and it's nothing more than a party trick.

You get complimented constantly for how you look/do things

>>733944411

You now require gas to run and must fill up daily

>>733944393
Not immune to bullets

>>733944099
only usable on fridays

>>733944531
How much to fill up? May be a decent trade off.

>>733944304
every second you use 10000 brain cells die.

ability to create your own video games without having to program them

>>733944453
Cops never help when you actually need them.

Escape the friendzone

>>733944492
but your head stays small and u can't see shit

>can nerf everyone's superpower

>>733944520
But they must scream it as loud as possible as close to your ear as possible

>>733944492
the size of your dick stays the same

Can traverse dimensions

>>733944592
u only create call of duty

>>733944520
but it's followed by suprise buttsecks
can make myself handsome

>>733944453
By not being pulled over you're instead considered "running from the police" and are chased and gunned down.

>>733944626
including your own whenever used

>>733944656
never go back

>>733944555
kek

>>733944592
their only shitty match three games (Candy Crush)

take any hero's powers at will

>>733944626
From a computer in your mom's basement

>>733944592
They're all bad minecraft clones

>>733944706

You end up only handsome to your mother

Can use telekinesis

>>733944626
But still a beta fag browsing b forever

>>733944555
holy shit my sides, anon, link paypal acc i'll donate my fking heritage to u

>>733944772
you can only use them for doing good

>>733944706
but it's followed by suprise buttsecks

>>733944810
Only on objects you're touching

>>733944772
but only nerfed one's from this thread

can make pizza out of shit

>>733944706
Only people who find you handsome, you're disgusted by

>>733944892
It still tastes like shit.

Every time I find a penny I magically get an extra penny.

>>733944892
It tastes like it too

able to play any instrument well

>>733944892
Still tastes like shit.

>>733944892
Still tastes like shit
Can turn anyone else's pizza into shit

>>733944892
but it tastes like shit

>I am lucky in every situation

>>733944892
Still tastes like shit

>>733944955
only as a ball

>>733942304
But only in pennys

>>733944955
everyone's deaf

can play any sport perfectly

>>733944953
allways drop both into a gutter

>>733944953
pennies are discontinued

metal bending

>>733944892
it has pineapple on it

>i become whoever i kill

>>733944955
Lose all sense of rhythm

>>733944982
but its dark souls 3 luck

>>733945039
can't kill anyone
can get a job

>>733945039
you have to eat them first

>>733944982
You are in a near death situation every 5 mins

>>733945128
as a prostitute

>>733945039
You keep all of their current health issues, such as death.

>>733945128
the job will always be a trial and wont get paid

>i can give aids

>>733943196
water is H2O you fucking neet.

>>733945036
Every degree of bend costs you an oz. of your own blood

>>733941743
Ugly confirmed

>>733945213
only to yourself

>>733945218
u must be new

>>733945213
but only to yourself


immune to every disease

>>733945213
You have it as well and will die very soon

any animal is now your companion

>>733945213
But only through direct sexual contact. HIV is not a superpower.

>>733945036
Pennies are worth more for there metal then there value so this changes nothing

>>733945288
exept sexual ones

>>733945039
Your old identity is considered murdered by your new one, always considered a "Murderer at large"

>>733945313
Only while penis is in vagoo.

>>733945288
only if u keep eating shit

>can bring peace to any situation

>>733945128
Always lose your job on day 1

Ability to conjure mystical items of great power

>>733945412
when alone

I can make any woman want to fuck me

>>733944656
only 3 dimensions available are length width and height

>>733945457
only on DnD

>>733945457
every item has a dildo shape

>can turn pizza into shit and kill my enemies with it

>>733945361
yeah but the power will not work if they are not being made

>>733945457
They are all sex toys that must be inserted into your anus. The greater the power, the bigger the toy without any regard to how much your anus can stretch.

>Immunity from all forms of death.

>>733945541
but you have to eat the shit afterwards
can get pussy at any time

>>733945574
age in real time

>>733945495
you dont get to choose. one way or another, she's going to fuck you.

>>733945495
but all these have a larger penis thn u

>my cum gives people eternal life

>>733945574
Only after dying.

>>733945574
Fall into a coma forever

>>733941680
but you're a somewhat clunk robot designed for war use and the government is chasing you

>>733945647
Only works on blood relations.