What's the worst sexual experience you've had with a girl?

None

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>>732830715
>be me
>backseat of car
>fingering gf
>want to clean hands of pussy juice
>use hand sanitizer
>Grab dick
>put it in her mouth
>just put dick coated in hand sanitizer in gf's mouth
>apologize and clean dick off in her pussy

>>732831233
Ugh i wouldve told you to gtfo

Be me too drunk start having sex get soft pass out. Wake up start again go soft pass out. Wake up start again get soft. Pass out. Wake up go to work

i'm a girl but my worst expierience with a guy was he was fucking me from behind and his dick kept slipping out for some reason, and so i ask him to stop to see what's going on and his fucking foreskin had ripped and he was bleeding all over and he said he didn't even feel it. Had to go to the ER and clean my sheets

>>732831402
You'd be walking home then

>>732830715
Sex

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>Be me
>Dating girl for a few weeks
>Sitting on couch
>Femanon asks if I want a handjob
>Say yeah sure
>She talks my pants off
>Starts rubbing me
>Oh-God.jpg
>Hehe sorry..
>She looks at me like I killed her family
>She asks what's the matter with me
>Ask what's the matter with her
>She gets mad at me "You ruined my new dress you stupid asshole"
>"Are you joking? I bought you that dress"

She got mad at me for cumming on a dress I had bought her a week earlier.

I basically just left.

>gf agrees to anal sex
>well maybe not
>struggles and flinch/clinch every time I try to penetrate
>pulls forward as I try to penetrate her
>I slip and fall forward as I was on my tip toes trying to have sex standing on the floor/on the bed
>dick rams into gfs asshole
>penis covered in shit and blood
>gf crying in pain

Immediately cumming.

>>732832476
Did you use lube

>>732832476

I was screwing my GF doggy-style, and just as I was about come, on the final, hardest thrust, I accidentally slipped out of hole #1 and plowed right into hole 2#. GF shot away from me like a spring amd just buried her face in the pillow. A few moments later, after I'd finally realised what had happened, I timidly said "Oh, shit, you know I didn't do that on purpose, right?"

She grunts into the pillow: "Yeah, I know, just... gimme a minute, here...".

It was quite some time before we tried anal on purpose.

>>732832632
yes. that was years ago. we're 28 now and we're married. shes just one of those girls that cant relax to have anal sex regardless of any precaution taken. We've done it successfully three times, I think, since then... but its really underwhelming and I've pretty much given up on it because I dont enjoy having sex with her if she isnt enjoying it. I leave it at occasionally rubbing my dick across her asshole, which she accepts.

>>732830715
Getting Herpes.

>>732830715
i couldn't get my dick hard... so we didint had sex

>>732833033
How's to live with that?

>>732832010
She got actually mad? Not like, jokingly flirty mad? Also, wasn't she in control of where you'll cum?

Is it true that most of the southy girls from US are covered in STDs?

>>732832975

Have you tried poppers, or a speculum? The former can help her relax, and the latter can very gradually dilate her ass.

When my wife caught me fucking her best friend. I got reamed a new asshole in divorce court and am still paying.

>>732830715
Had sex with one once.. it was awfull

>>732833381
Why did you cheat?

>>732831572
tits or gtfo

>>732833187
Well, I haven't had it long.
It sucks, mentally, because other than the girl that was there when I found out I had it, I haven't had to break it to anyone yet.
Live with it is easy, but there is such a negative stigma attached to it that I fear future relationships for that reason.
But it's easy to not spread, and even if you do get it they don't stay long, and the most they do is itch (for me at least).
You can also take meds that reduce your breakouts, and helps prevent spreading.
Or you can take meds during your break out that reduce their length and severeness.

Life with Herpes is honestly really easy, if everyone else could stop thinking they're so awful, when it's really not.

>>732830715
>Me and the wife going at it 69 style
>I've got her meat flaps in my mouth, tonguing her clitoris
>She's writhing in pleasure, about to cum
>She farts directly into my nose.

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>>732833237
Yeah actually mad. She was leaning over me. I felt like shit.

>>732833767
Good thing you left. That sounds like someone who gets off from drama and making others feel like shit.

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Me at 20. Have gf of three years, but different girl comes over to stay the night. I've wanted to fuck her since we were 15. We watch a movie and cuddle, kiss a little bit. Movie ends. She starts giving me hand job which quickly turns into blowjob. She's amazing at it. About 3 minutes in I feel guilty for cheating on my gf and stop her. Obviously would have fucked all night and my conscious ruined it.

Pic related. She still stayed the night.

>>732833597

So, did you keep going 'til she came, and *then* puke? That would be the honourable thing to do. Also, she would really owe you.

>>732833859
Did you end up telling your gf?

Doing it doggy style with my guy. First time we've had sex. He cums in literally about 4 or 5 thrusts...

He was obviously really embarrassed but tried to play it cool.
It was kind of cute but I felt bad that he felt bad.

>>732833859
u did the right thing dude.

>>732830715
>be me, 15
>tryna get head from my gf, now ex
>we're watching movies on netflix on my couch
>start getting freaky
>start rubbing her vagoo with my fingers
>she's moaning and enjoying herself
>her enjoyment is turning me on
>starting kissing her neck and start doing tongue
>i go under her panties and start rubbing her clit
>clit is hard, vagoo is nice and wet
>netherregionsareengorging.jpeg
>i long for head
>i motion for her to get on her knees
>quite hesitant, dicks kinda creep her out
>does it anyway, quite surprised and happy, as she never once sucked my peepee
>gets on her knees
>pulls down my pants
>right when my peen becomes unleashed, some pre somes out
>she's instantly grossed out
>feelsbadman.png
>starts crying because she felt that she wasn't being fair as i always give her head
>spent the rest of the day just cuddling
Pretty bad, hate being left with blue balls

>>732830715
I have a couple:

>First GF, we're both 14 years old
>Lose virginity to each other
>Fast forward 3 years
>Relationship getting stale cuz we got together too young, also she gained a lot of weight
>Sex starts getting awkward somehow, like she doesn't want to do it
>She starts doing this thing where she doesn't wipe her ass when she knows we're gonna fuck
>Being young and horny I fuck her anyway
>Look at and smell shit the entire time smeared all over her buttcheeks

Eventually I figured out she did it on purpose, cuz when I would take her by surprise she was always clean. But she was purposefully dirty when she knew we would fuck. I think she did it thinking it would deter me.

Second story coming up... next one is probably better....

>>732833953
I told her I had cheated on her, but didn't let it get too far..

>>732834298
>>732834368
Did she break up with you?

>>732834031
Yeah.... you're right. But something about that girl always had drawn me in. Sometimes I wish I would have done it.

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>be me
>driving home from a wild ass party with the gf
>she's drunk as fuck, i'm just enough to drive
>fastest route home
>the highway
>130 km/h
>gf is suddenly horny as fuck
>wants to roadhead
>i drive standard
>either i get home safe or i risk it and recieve head
>alcohol kicks in
>start to get the best blo-wjob of my entire life
>high speed on the highway
>gf takes off her bra and throws it down the window
>niggawhy.jpg
>whatever, she's back to sucking
>about to cum
>130 km/h
>lose control of the car
>i barely manage to regain control
>jizz at the same time
>gf choked on all the cum and instantly puked
>everywhere
>in
>the
>fucking
>car
>mfw

>>732834460
We broke up for about 5 months. We are married now.

>>732833069
gayyyyy

>>732830715

>me and friends driving with girl
>girl is a true whore, the kind who will fuck absolutely anyone with nothing more than a 'lets fuck'
>17 and 7/10, so we're always gangbanging her, etc
>anyway, so we tell her to take off her pants in the car
>her pussy in fucking rancid
>absolutely putrid vaginal rot, we're all gagging
>open the windows even though it's pouring rain
>my car will reek for days
>take her back to my place and make her take a fucking shower before running a train on her

>>732834226
>Being so thirsty that you're willing to get shit on your dick

>>732833537
Eh, something like one in three sexually active adults has herpes. Basically, it's just a minor nuisance.

>>732833859
you did yhe right thing she looks like a skank

>>732832507
>>732833069
Classic moves.

>>732831402
In the words of the great Sean Connery
Le tits now

>>732831233
>not cleaning off pissy juice with your mouth.

Faggot

>>732834580
Ever cheated on her again after you got back together?

>>732830715
kek sexual experience on /b/

>>732834776
I haven't heard/read the word skank for at least 5 years.

>>732833935
It ruined the mood, but we had a laugh and that was it.

>>732834876
>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
>Only a fool would take anything posted here as a fact.

>>732830715
Not having one

>>732833430

the better question is why does every woman seem ok fucking their friends husbands

>>732834861
Nothing physical. Texted and snapchat with a couple people... but I haven't done any form of cheating for a while now. Feels good man.

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Some drunk bitch was giving me a blowjob at a gas station and out of the blue stopped sucking and started crying, some weird shit about her mom or it was her boss I don't fucking know, the whole time she didn't get my dick out of her mouth and it was getting really uncomfortable and weird, didn't cum in the end and she wanted to kiss me but her mouth stank of dick and cheap wine.

>Be me last november
>had a threesome with my gf and a girl the year before that
>looking to do that again on tinder
>get a match, girl is up for it
>6.5/10 but very enthusiastic
>pick her up
>at least 40 pounds heavier than she looked
>get to the motel, she gets naked
>tits fall under her armpits
>think that I can just close my eyes and kiss until I notice she's missing a tooth
>try to go down on her, so fat she has another pussy around her pussy
>tastes like beef jerk
>has a weird birthmark or some shit that looks like a tick over her clit
>try to doggy style her
>my erection dies after the 10th pump or so, impossible to proceed
>take dick out, condom covered in pussy running
>spend the next few hours mostly just talking
>mfw my worst sex experience was a threesome

>>732833597
Happened to me to, and another similar one:
>69ing gf
>she squirts right in my nostrils
>shit go straight to my lungs
>tfw almost drowned by bullseye'd squirt

>>732830715
I caught a hooker in the streets and only on the way to my room while we were in my car did I realize that she was a transsexual.
Awkward...

>>732830715
I came in 5 mins. Gf at the time obviously didn't climax for shit.

>>732834853
Mmmmm, pissy juice.

>Girl riding me
>Dick pops out and she ges down and it bends on her thigh

>pain

>>732834226
2nd story, 2 parts :

>Be me, newly single from bad LTR, early 20's
>Meet girl on OKC
>Within a day or two we hangout
>She's pretty hot, much younger
>We makeout first date
>She goes silent for like 3 weeks. I figure she lost interest, so I stop contacting her within the first week
>Around week 3 she hits me up, asks me why I stopped talking to her
>cuzyoustoppedresponding.jpg
>Out of nowhere she changes the subject, sends me nudes
>Tells me to comeover and fuck her that same morning
>I go for it
>Get there, she's waiting at the door in nothing but a robe
>We start kissing, fingering, touching, etc
>She's super aggressive, pulls me on couch, gives me pornstar level blowjob
>For some reason I can't get 100% hard. Something is off, can't figure out what
>At this point we're fucking full on. Ate her out, BJ, fucked her on top, doggy, etc.
>Figure out what it was. All of a sudden a car pulls up and she literally grabs me and pulls me toward her bedroom
>"please anon just get in the room"
>I go along with it cuz IDK what the fuck is happening
>She locks us both in her room, throws a comforter over my head/face and sits on my face
>cantbreatheman.png
>Some guy comes into the house, comes straight back to her room and knocks on the door
>Calls her name, she doesn't answer
>He starts jiggling handle, its locked. He starts getting upset
>She finally answers him, pretends she just woke up with sleepy voice

>>732835363
>He calms down and asks why door is locked
>She has no excuse except "being too tired to get up and unlock it, must've locked it accidentaly, etc"
>He gets real sad sounding and tells her he loves her, and that he has to get back to work
>She just says "OK" or something
>He leaves and I ask her who that was
>"My brother, he came home from work"
>In the moment not sure what to do. Feels really bad man, never wanted to be a guy who a girl cheated with, but at the same time my dick was already in every hole.
>Figured there was no going back
>Took her back to the living room, she put on a dog collar and I choked her while she told me she "loved daddy's cock"
>I pulled out and came all over her ass. Fucked her raw, no condom.

>>732830715

That's easy.

>Be 17 year old me
>Girlfriend of 2 years just broke up with me
>I'm fucking wrecked
>Girl down my street has expressed some sexual interest
>I was lonely and horny so I got her number and had her call me when her parents left
>Time for some pussy
>We start having sex and it's bretty gr8
>I get confident as fuck and start pounding the absolute shit out of her
>She looks at me and says "Stick it in my ass"
>I'm like "Oh, fuck"
>I've never done anal
>She gives me lube
>I lube the FUCK out of my dick and her ass. Literally 3/4 of the bottle of astroglide.
>It slides in so fucking easy.
>I go to town on her ass and she starts saying weird shit.
>"Fuck my puppy."
>I slowed down and had to hear it again. I couldn't fucking believe it.
>She said it again "Fuck my dirty puppy"
>I just ignore it because, hey, I'm fucking a girl in the ass.
>I get confident again and start pounding the shit out of her.. But this time literally.
>I smell shit
>I look down
>I see shit
>I vomit on her back
>She's pissed because I vomited
>I'm pissed because she has shit all over my bare cock
>I get a UTI because of her shit
>We never speak again because I can't put up with her shit.

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>>732834576
lmao what kind of car?

>>732834729
>Still fucking it

>>732835008
Not trying to be patronizing, but it is genuinely interesting how you don't view that as a form of cheating. I definitely would. Maybe cheating changes peoples view of what is "cheating", although it should be an agreement between the couple on what is considered cheating.

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>>732835471
>Can't put up with her shit

Kek

>>732835500
old 1999 pink tercel

named the sex mobile

Hi

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>be me
>underageb& at the time
>hookup on craigslist
>Shes about 70 pounds more than pic implied
>Eh, at least the face is cute
>She wants doggy style
>Ok
>hands me lube and says to put it in her ass
>uhh... A'ight..
>goes ok
>we both finish and go on
>have coffee after
>gotta take a leak
>go to bathroom
>DICK
>IS
>LITTERALLY
>COVERED
>IN
>SHIT
Last craigslist hookup I ever had
>mfw I still get off on buttsex

>>732835606

well yeah after we made her wash that shit thoroughly. sure as fuck didn't eat her out tho.

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>>732835471
>>We never speak again because I can't put up with her shit.

>>732830715
got a girl pregnant when I was 21 ended up "doing the right thing" and married her lame ass...after 10 years we couldn't stand looking at each other anymore and finally got a divorce.

>>732835471
Faggot.

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>>732833520

This is why I dont do anal
I'd probably kill a bitch if she didn't wipe her ass and I got shit all over my dick.

>be 18
>texting a friend who I had always secretly wanted to fuck
>she starts coming on strong when I ask her to come hang out that week
>"what color panties should I wear" "I like it rough" etc. etc.
>I'm down because I'm stoned as shit and her ass was fantastic
>fast fwd a couple days
>I cut class and stayed home, she texts and comes by
>lets herself in while I'm showering

cont.

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Be me

Back when MySpace was the popular one found a girl local to me using the search function. I messaged her and after a little ninja wording scheduled to meet her later that night and fuck. I was a GI at the time and was home on leave. I ended up borrowing my best friends truck and drove 45 minutes to meet this bitch. When I finally found her house I saw her and snuck into her house through her bedroom window. ...(As a father your an idiot for putting your daughter in the most easy to acces room.). I got into the room and immediately noticed that she was a bit thicker now and when she looked in the photo. She way noticeably chubbier but it was her. I was gent and didn't wanna waste time so a short chat and I was in her pussy. It was soft and warm but it lacked the grippy feeling. Fml I thought a loose pussy. I wasn't enjoying it. So, right after jumping in I ducked her as hard and fast as I could. I came in a pretty shorntime after that. Can't remember if I had a rubber on or not. I went to my phone and pretended to read a text and then went OH shit I GOTTA GO! MY FRIEND IS IN TROUBLE! And then I quickly got dressed and left with only a small goodbye. True story.

>>732836154

Wiping your ass doesn't help when the shit is inside your ass.

>>732835637
I do view that as a form of cheating. I'm saying I haven't been doing anything physical with a girl for a long time. I also haven't texted or talked to a girl in any way that would be considered cheating for a long time either.

>>732836282
Ah ok. Cool bro, I'm glad you're not doing it. Do you feel like allowing yourself to cheat that one time kind of made it harder to resist cheating other times?

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>>732836239
Real shit.

>>732836213

Go on, faggot.

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>>732836213
>come out of the shower to see her sitting in my desk chair
>fuck yeah
>I don't even get dressed
>we're making out and I take her clothes off
>she lays on my bed and I get on top of her
>the smell hits me in the face, like a fishmarket in the heat of the july sun
>can't stay hard for more than a minute after that
>just got off of her and didn't make eye contact
>I never talked to her again, which sucked because I knew her for a year or two before that

>>732833537
That sounds like something someone with herpes would say.

>>732830715
I had a threesome with my neighbor and one of her workers. His dick was shaped like a football, it was the most disturbing and creepy thing I've ever seen. To make matters worse he was a giant baby when I fucked him. I mean christ man, I used like a 4th of a bottle of lube, it couldn't have hurt THAT bad. It really threw me off my game. I'm pretty sure i'm the only one who didn't orgasm.

>Be me last 4/20, haven't had sex in over a month
>Convince low libido girlfriend to eat an edible with me
>Brownies really weak, had to eat two, gf only ate 1/4 of one
>I start to feel it about an hour later
>Feels good man
>She feels it and starts freaking out
>Try to calm her down
>Out of the blue, she suggests we have sex so she can focus on that and maybe forget about freaking out
>Start to fuck
>Feels amazing
>Feel her cum twice on my cock
>She's done and now wants me to stop
>I fucking stop and start stroking next to her
>She says the noise of me stroking is freaking her out and wants me to stop
>Rage quit

>>732831572
fuck i have nightmares about this happening got quite tight foreskin :S its happened to a friend of mine but its not really something i can just ask him about haha

>>732833537
>>732834763

this is what a typical herpes carrier says, you fucked up accept it and kys

>>732836450
Somewhat. But I also realized how shitty it made me feel, which made me not continue to do so.

>be me
>be 19
>met this chick at a party, take her to my place
>wants to give me some head
>pulls my dick out and goes to town
>a couple minutes, my dick feels a sharp pain
>she bit my dick
>it started to bleed
>she thought it would be sexy and kinky
>tell her to leave
>go to the ER for the night

She told all her friends and they all give me shit about not being open-minded or some shit

>>732834026
Take it as a compliment, it wouldn't have happened if he wasn't into you.

>>732836877
Feels man.
My wife thinks it's funny to mess with me and pretend and actually hit my balls. She has no idea the pain it causes. Sassy little punk.

>>732836877
Dude, I have two separate scars from two separate bitches on my dick from them bitting it. Apparently I'm just girthy enough for it to be a problem, cause the the one was a well known cumslut and loved to fellate men.

A girl I really liked messaged me because she was feeling really horny thinking about me, it was so crazy and sudden, she said she could drive to my place and do some dirty things. I went out for some condoms and beers, watched some TV before she arrived, tidied up the place a bit, smoked some weed and watched some TV, she was taking more time that I was expecting so I gave her call, but couldn't reach it.

Turns out she died in a car crash, found out about it the next day.

>>732837204
Fuck!

>>732837204
True story? Did you go to the funeral?

>>732837089
I had some chick tug on my nuts while giving me a handjob. In return when I was going down on her I bit her clit but she liked it. I ended up telling her I didn't like that and she just called me a pussy

>>732837455

I found out from social network, we weren't that close anyways, what's especially weird is that we never were THAT kind of friends, why she wanted to fuck me is beyond me.

>>732837204
Don't horny and drive!?

Boyfriend never goes down on me bc he's gay

>>732837960
maybe cuz you're a stank pussy hoe
Clean your shit, i don't go down on girls either. It's just something i don't like doing unless you are a 9/10 or 10/10

I notice that every one of these stories involves having sex with a human woman. Is sex with animals really that much better?

>>732837960
Gf doesnt want me to go down on her. Too bad, I really like it

>>732838768
I shower and shave everyday and make sure everything is clean for him. Going on 3 years and he's gone down on me maybe 2 times. I suck his dick on the regular w his hairy sweaty balls. Not fair.

>>732839224
So stop sucking him off unless he returns the favor. He's a guy, you've gotta train him like you train little kids

>>732832930
Yep, been there. She was riding cowgirl so she got my thrust and her weight come down on it but she still sprang up impossibly fast. It looked so crazy I started laughing before I could help myself then we had a pretty similar exchange. Good times.

>>732834990
>the better question is why does every woman seem ok fucking their friends husbands
Er, not really. Why you cheated is still important. IF that chick didn't give it to you, she would have given it to someone else but she could only fuck you if you were available for it...

>>732831233
>hand sanitizer

Digusting.

>>732833537
I used it once as an excuse to break up with a girl I'd been on and off with. I was sick of dealing with her rap and told her I caught it from a random I banged since the last time I'd been with her, worked like a treat.

>>732839509
You're both fucking lucky. a half inch frontwards and you'd have broken your dick like I did. That shit took like 2 months to heal AND required a surgery

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>>732835215
Why did you go through with it? We've aborted a couple times because they weren't as advertised, it's just not worth it, just go home and fuck each other while you watch some 3some porn or something, that usually works in a pinch lol

>>732832476
Funny as fuck, sorry about that anon

>>732835230
Well if it was a passable trap then why not? If it was a bloke in a skirt, how drunk/stoned were you that you didn't notice?

>>732830715
>be me 17
>girlfriend is home by herself for the weekend and wants me to come over
>Come over and play rocket league and league of legends with her
>11:00 watch spongebob together shes in bed Im lying on the floor next to her
>Girlfriend asks me to get in bed with her i do
>turn tv off I fall asleep
>half an hour later i wake up with a boner
>girlfriend is touching my dick and asks to fuck
> being a christian fag i say Im not ready for sex
>she cries for three hours
>we break up
:(

>>732835386
Fuck man. That's brutal

>>732839224
bruh id eat your pussy on the daily

I was at a party where this girl who i've been flirting with for a while.

Some touching, go upstairs to her friends room(younger sister of my friend)

Fuck, wasn't that good but she was open for anything so it's okay.

Doggy, slip my thumb in ahole.

Asks me to fuck anally...i agree.

We fuck, she hurts. I suddenly feel something running on my dick.

I look and at that moment shit is collecting, pressing on my pelvis.

Pull out, she completely shits her friend's bed.

I quickly go to the bathroom to wash myself. Left the bedroom door open apparently.

While washing myself, someone walked in on the girl. Total chaos and humilliation from multiple people.

Abort! I leave the party and take a shower at a friends house.

Girl is now known for it. I never recieved a comment

>>732834990
Fuckin this. Is it just me or do female friendships seem paper thin

>>732835306
Owwwww FUCK that hurts just to think about

>>732831233

How much hand sanitizer do you use you fucking animal

>>732833537
>take meds

Only if you've got insurance. I got shingles a couple years back and they gave me Valtrex. Cost me 20 bucks but w/o insurance it would be about $280 an outbreak.

>be me 14
>gf13
>she was super aggressive for sex
>well to loose her virginty
>that special comes
>super nervous not really into it
>fumble to put condom on
>gf in full dick accepting mode
>im shaking like a bitch
>trying to find her hole and touch the rong hole at first
>turns out she has more ass hair than me and quite a few dingle berrys
>rest of the time was awkward and i just wanted to leave as quick as possible

>First time having sex
>Can hardly feel anything through the condom
>Suddenly starts feeling great
>mustbeclosetocumming
>Tells me to cum
>Makes me blow instantly
>Pull out
>Condom had broken
>Get planB, no problems
>She's super cool about it
>Realize if she wasn't I could have been falsely accused of rape
>She could have refused plan B
>She could have done anything she wants
>Decide sex isn't worth it
>Never had sex again and don't plan to

>>732839190
Don't take this the wrong way anon, but 'don't eat me out' isn't something you hear often.
Are you not so good/have had a bad record in the past or she actually just doesn't want her box munched?

>>732839338
This.

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>With my ex wife when we were dating
>Staying at my parents house and they have a water softener
> Something about the water softener is bothering her skin, but she shrugs it off
>She takes a shower and comes into the room so we can bone down
>We're going at a good clip and but the look on her face is more pain than pleasure
>I ask if she's alright (always a boner-killer)
>She smiles a little and nods, trying to be affectionate and keep it going
>Maybe 30 seconds later her face twists in pain and she's full on crying
>I'm super worried and go to pull out but she stops me
>Says it's her skin, the softener is making it feel like it's on fire
>Says she's fine, she wants me to finish
>MFW no possible way I can cum with my fiance literally weeping and only wanting to keep going so I could finish

We couldn't even go to a hotel to get her to a different shower, I just tried to use bottled water to get whatever it was off her skin. Felt so bad for her.

>>732840351
>being a christian fag i say Im not ready for sex
You might have missed the theme of the thread just slightly lol
Was being a good boy for jeebus really worth not giving her the D and losing a clearly horny girl?

>>732834226
This is SURPRISINGLY common behaviour. the fuck is wrong with people?

>>732841602

lol wtf is a water softener water is already soft why tf would you need to soften it

>>732840694
That's not new, like the old saying goes:
A man says to his friend, I like your gf, I should find a girl LIKE her.
A woman says to herself, I'm gonna have HIM.

The other side of it is it was his choice to cheat-no matter what happens, he made his decision.

>>732841869
Hard, calcium-heavy water in our area, parents liked the water the water felt with the softener so they tried and kept it.

>>732841473
Broken condoms are super rare, try lube. She was probably nervous too and wasn't as wet as she could be.
You got lucky but that shit happens all the time, girls that age do not want to get pregnant so it's not as bad as you think but if you want to be a monk, that's up to you anon.

I used to have a drinking problem. One time after drinking for about eight hours straight I started getting frisky with a girl. Was too drunk to get hard. Had whiskey dick.

I tried to fuck her and kept losing my hard on. I was trying to fuck her with a limp noodle. I said, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry." and left.

Goddamn I shouldn't have apologized. That made it more embarrassing for some reason.

>>732832476
are you lewie seekay?

>>732841999

I'm just going to wait for men to have actual rights or AI to come full force. The pleasure of sex is simply not worth the potential risks. I can't even go balls deep anyway because I'm too long, blowjobs are safer and more enjoyable

>>732834576
cool man what king of mpg per gallon do you get??

>>732841894
My wife had some of her friend's clothes at our house because she had borrowed them.

Fucking women and their clothes and shit. You'll never catch any of my buddies wearing my clothes. They can buy their own.

Anyways, my Wife had called her friend to come over to our house to get the clothes because they had been washed. I was at home by myself (it was my day off). Her friend starts acting weird. She decides to change in the same room as me. She's pretty fucking hot so I couldn't help but to snag a glance at her. She did that cheesy ass line "You like what you see?" with a grin. I'm as hard as a fucking rock. I say nothing, I'm just sitting there slack-jawed. She says she cane see my cock is hard through my gym shorts. I fucking ALMOST let my dick think for me. But I looked at a wedding picture of my wife and I hung up on the wall behind the topless bitch. Suddenly my wedding ring felt 1000lbs too heavy. I, audibly, said "Fuck no, get out." She acted like she was super offended. I immediately call my wife and tell her what happened.

She doubted me, she thought I was making up a white knight story about me avoiding sex with a beautiful woman for love. We fought, I told her that I didn't. Surprisingly, her friend told the truth about the event and went on to say that I was a pussy for not taking the oportunity to get "good pussy".

Uh, thank you very much but my wife's pussy is pretty fucking nice. Wife's friend went on to sleep with my best friend. My best friend's wife found out and they had a fucking nasty divorce. Kids were distraught and they tried to take everything from one another.

I avoided a homewrecker.

Is it just like a fetish for women to fuck their friend's husbands? Is it like a power thing? Regardless, it's toxic as fuck.

>Pickup sloot from bar.
>go to hers
>gives A+++ bj
>turn her over and start doing her doggie
>pounding hard
>stop suddenly after seeing ungodly sight
>she is well into it and knows why I stopped
>ungodly hemorrhoid right there
>sloot turns her head and says to me
>"touch it."

I didn't even

>>732842637
Lol

>been dating for 6 months
>get a hotel
>don't have condom
>have sexy time
>doesn't want me to cum inside
>whoops.jpeg
>starts freaking out and crying
>tell her my bad
>get plan B

>>732842600
>Suddenly my wedding ring felt 1000lbs too heavy. I, audibly, said "Fuck no, get out."
Fucking gold star anon, I'm proud of you.
>I immediately call my wife and tell her what happened.
Double gold star plus plus anon.
>She doubted me, she thought I was making up a white knight story about me avoiding sex with a beautiful woman for love.
Chicks, amirite?
>We fought, I told her that I didn't. Surprisingly, her friend told the truth about the event
Lucky break, son
>I avoided a homewrecker.
Well, she was trying to fuck a married guy so, yeah, she might be little bit lol
>Is it just like a fetish for women to fuck their friend's husbands? Is it like a power thing? Regardless, it's toxic as fuck.
No argument there. Women are their own worst enemy, all we can do is act right and stay civilized.
You did the right thing anon, never doubt it.

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>>732842637
topkek.psd

>>732840351
You're a moron

>>732841317
> dingle berries
My sides!!

>be me probably 10
>go to take a bath
>remember friend telling me about masturbation
>also remember watching a video of a chick putting her cunt under a bath faucet
>put two and two together
>draw myself a masturbath
>put my 10 year old asshole under the faucet
>someone in the house flushes a toilet
>scolding hot wat rushes over my little cock and balls and asshole

>>732844119
*mormon

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>>732844843

>be 18
>at girlfriends house with girlfriend, parents are gone
>girlfriend and I are lying on her bed, grinding hard
>starts to get really hot
>start unzipping my jeans
>go to fast and catch erect dickskin in zipper
>zipper tears off a line on skin from the head to ~halfway down the shaft
>blood runs down my rapidly softening penis
>scramble off the bed leaving a trail of blood and tears
>stumble down the steps and into her bathroom
>yank off my undies and try to stop the cascade
>eyes go blurry, start reeling back and forth
>slip in blood and pass out before I even touch the floor
>wake up 10 minutes later
>girlfriend is crying upstairs
>walk-run to the door and to my car
>drive home crying while I listen to Seriously Sinatra on the radio

>>732830715
she was there when I woke up

>>732842057
That is weird - I have heard of it, but I am the exact opposite - heavy drinking makes me super horny, super hard, but most of the time I CANNOT finish to save my life

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>>732842637

Go to thailand
pick up a Freelancer
ask her if she is lady she nods yes
go to room
very horny undress quick
her dick drops down

bye

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Spent 4 hours trying to put it in, kept going soft. Would stroke it hard, then soft when I tried to put in, she was supportive. Then I went home a virgin.

>>732844777

This one got me lol #topkek

>>732844777
nice trips

>Be drunk at a party
>Friends girlfriend invites over her friend.
>Shes hot, legit 9/10
>Blonde, blue eyes big tits, big ass, but skinny and short.
>Start chatting her up because I'm a 6'4" Alpha.
>Get her to go into a room and get naked
>Whip out my 7.5" white cock
>Start fucking her
>She is the loosest thing I have ever fucked
>It's like dipping my dick into a glass of water
>She looks at me and says "I thought your dick would be big, but its really small, I can't feel anything.
>Then says he black friends she fucks are all 10+ inches.
>After hearing she fucks niggers I get instantly soft
>Out my clothes back on and leave her in the bed without saying a word.
>Go back to the party and get even wasted beyond belief.
>Black dude comes by later to pick her up

>>732847737
Sorry for the poor English it's not my 1st language and I'm kind of drunk at the moment. Yes I'm a raging alcoholic.

>be me, 13
>sister, 12
>we are both becoming sexually aware
>try blowjobs
>sister bites my dick
>i run away crying

>Been single for a month or two
>Getting a bit desperate
>Going through old casual flings and such
>One's had a kid and has been divorced for a bit
>She was a bit chubby but cute face
>Text for a bit
>Hey we should catch up ; D
>Start flirting it up
>Pics on facebook show shes gained a little weight,
>but nostalgia is there and my dick is hard
>She comes around
>She is REALLY good at angles on facebook,
>She looks like she ate her former chubby self.
>Her face is still kinda cute though, fat hasn't built up there somehow
>Well im here now, gotta fuck
>But up close, she's got really fine hairs all over
>Unshaven arm pits... unshaven everything really
>I struggle to get it in just because of her girth
>Hell i struggle to get hard
>She can't do any more than just lay there and pant heavily.
>Shes not doing anything but sweating heavily
>The smell hits me,
>Like someone rolled sweaty gym pants in butter.
>"Lets try it from behind" she says
>Finally some Effort from her, okay this could be okay
>With a monumental effort, she rolls over and gets on her knees,
>Barely she's resting on her stomach, arms not even bothering to support her
>Sweat and juices from her flabby lips have been flowing down into her but crack.
>Now that she's up and im fucking her from behind the smell is rancid.
>I quickly go soft.
>I flub it and half pull out and pretend to smack it into her pelvis
>"OH, Ow ow fuck, Fuck that hurt..... awww it feels attacked now, i hope i didn't bruise it. lets stop for a break"
>We end up chatting and watching some netflix after
>Shes keen to keep going
>"Oh yeah sorry it's too sore, i don't think i could get it up"
>Change sheets and shower as soon as she leaves

>>732842600
truly honorable.

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Had my back clawed during sex. I made the mistake of going to the public pool the next day; I didn't know that I had claw marks all over my back. That shit was embarrassing.

>>732847737
Did you get an HIV test?

>>732830715
>be me
>be uncle
>uncle raped me

>Be 37
>tight little 19 yo goth girl is way into me
>love me some strange, but can't handle the black lipstick
>tell her to ditch the black face for one day
>doing some lines, smoking the trees
>whip it out in her face
>engage operation vaccu-suck

She was so terrible at it, that I told her she can stop.

Pity, she has fantastic lips. Fantasy kind.

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>Jack off earlier
>Fuck buddy wanted sex
>Couldn't get it up
Ya, that's the worst thing that could happen

>>732830715
I don't feel like writing a huge green text so I'll just get to the interesting part.

>doggy style
>spread her ass
>Did she even wipe her ass AT ALL??
>ABORT MISSION

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Be me, age 17 back when my now fiancée and I first started officially dating.
>her and I have always been very sexually attracted to each other
>known each other for many years before this and I know about haw she was sexually abused by her father
>she has for the most part gotten past it
>but occasionally some small action or a squeezing her arm a little to hard would suddenly trigger some horrific memory for her
>Happens incredibly rarely
>we have fucked a few times before
>sexy time starts again
>we start getting hot and heavy
>We get undressed and I tell her to last back on the bed
>She smiles playfully and asks why would I want her to do that
>I put my hand on her chest and gently but firmly push her over onto the bed
>whathaveyoudone.png
>it triggers one of her memories
>I start to lean over and she bolts upright
> I ask her what's wrong and she tells me that the push was too much
>Think she is about to start crying, I fuckign wish that's what would have happened at least that I could handle
>she gets this thousand yard stare, eyes completely empty
>No emotions
>Feel fucking sick, I feel like my fucking guts are being torn out
>start to cry and sit quietly
>She sits like that for a few minutes before letting me touch her again
>one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced

SInce then she's become a lot more comfortable with me, we do light choking, handcuffs, spanking, anal, hair pulling, and shit like that. But I won't ever forget that look.

>be me
>ex coworker adds me on fb
>quit job 1 year ago, never hanged with her, but from far she seemed cute
>blonde, kind of thick but not fat, face seemed nice
>start talking to her "you were my crush, etc"
>she buys it
>out of nowhere next day she says she wants to come by
>sure
>we meet at the park near my house, light were shit so it was pretty dark
>she was at least 25 pounds heavier than her fb pics
>fuck it, I was horny so decided to go through, we start making out
>her saliva tastes like licking fucking plastic
>wtf, kills my dick, but we still kill for maybe 1 more min
>she asks me if she can come over at the weekend, decide to give her another chance, maybe she just ate something weird and her mouth tasted like that because of it
>yeah sure, come by
>weekend comes

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>>732844777

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>>732849454
>tell her to buy booze, she does
>we go to like a balcony we have in my house
>she starts kissing me and her mouth tastes even worse, it was like licking a fucking battery mixed with copper coins and a Nintendo 64 cartridge
>ohgod.jpeg
>not only that, but her mouth skin felt like she had a mustache recently shaved, so it itched a little
>pull back and start chatting and dedice to finish all the alcohol in one sit to try and get drunk enough to not care about it
>finish all my drinks and even half of hers
>she kisses me again, have to hold my breath to try and not taste it
>she started unzipping my pants
>oh well, at least a blow job will be good

>>732833537
>cum in a girls eye
>she screams
>she has eye herpes forever

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riding me, she's about to have her first orgasm, i'm about to cum but want her to as well, filled her up with everything, took the chance.

related

>be me, 20, man slut, last year
>match a tinder girl on wednesday
>wants to meet on the friday
>she has a free house
>meet her for drinks
>drive back to hers
>yeahhh easy lay
>can't get dick in vagina
>too tight
>"fuck girl you're really tight"
>"yeah I haven't had sex before lol"

Bitch warn a dude if you're a fucking virgin before hand jesus.

>>732850383
Jesus fuck man

Fuck Chubby Girl because Why Not
Seh always Gold me only Girls Got her to come
I always slip out because i only Had a semi hard on because of all The alcohol

>>732849411
>light choking, handcuffs, spanking, anal, hair pulling
At first I felt bad for you

>>732841999
Not that rare, nigga. I've had it happen twice in the last ~5 years, and I don't fucking fuck that often. Noticed it before I nutted both times, but neither of them were particularly low traffic girls, if you get what I'm saying. One of them goes "Oh, okay. Want me to finish you off with my mouth?" and then proceeds to swallow my load. The other just looks at me and says, "That's okay, I don't think you're dirty." and hops off the bed to grab another condom off of the dresser. That was like 4 years ago and I still kick myself for not suggesting we go without in that case.

>>732830715
First time having sex, busted nut and I farted.
I wish I was kidding.
We laughed it off but told her friends the next day...

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>be me a few years ago
>lonely
>depressed
>desperate
>try to fuck fat chick
>her pussy smelled so rancid and she was so fat and grotesque that I couldn't even get it up
>tell her my stomach hurt (not too far from the truth)

>be me
>15 years old
>fresh off a breakup, wanna get revenge
>I still text her friend
>things are getting saucy, she's a slut
>shes essentially the influence that made my gf into a cheating slut herself
>friend's sister catches us
>says she will rat to both my ex and her parents if I dont fuck her too
>usually this would be a good thing, but she was a crippled wheelchair girl, some back problem that meant she had noodle legs since birth
>fine whatever
>we meet up, chat for a bit in her room
>its a fucking mess, clothes piled high everywhere, how does she get anything done
>leaves wheelchair in hallways and crawls to dingy ass squeaky bed with an itchy mattress and one blanket
>how can someone who has to crawl have this much mess
cont.

>>732850869
Why change your opinion? That's pretty tame, and lots of girls enjoy a little domination, regardless of traumatic backstory.

>>732851488
>its pretty terrible
>ex and I used to kiss with tongue a good bit
>after a bit of talking with crip she dives on me
>we kiss, she forced her tongue in my mouth
>I think im deepthroating her tongue
>shes not human
>tears form
>whatever, pull off and bite her neck so i dont have to deal with that
>grab her tits
>what the fuck theyre rock solid
>they arent even fake either, its like grabbing styrofoam
>how can one person so be terrible in every way
>enough of that, lets just get her wet and slam this weirdo
cont.

>>732851689
>move my hand down to her pants
>dont even need to unbutton her jeans, theres enough room to just slide my hand down them
>not wearing panties
>fur
>more fur
>theres no pussy just fur
>oh there it is
>teasing her clit, shes moaning
>slide a finger in
this was my first time getting this far with any girl by the way. Prior to this I had no frame of reference, but I knew it wasnt supposed to be like this
>Its the void
>slide another finger in, and another
>shes's loving it, but to me it's just weird
>needs to pee, brb
>out of curiosity smell my fingers
>its the smell your balls get when you havent showered for 5 days and you had sick shits recently
>thinking I should run
>I cant, mom dropped me off
>she comes back and I think the worst part is over
>it has yet to begin

>friend and his gf over, shooting pills
>he wants to leave, she doesn't
>he starts being a dick, yanking on her, yelling at her and shit
>tell him to knock it the fuck off
>eventually throw him out, she stays
>shoot some more blues together
>her bf is outside my house, go scream at him, 'real men don't hit women' etc
>shoot some more blues
>girl is hot, 7/10
>8 hours of shooting pills goes by with intermittent standing up to her bf for her
>she's finally fucked up enough to look past my fatness and give me a gratitude fuck for the pills and defending her
>finally rewarded with sexytime
>'but i'm on my period, i don't want to do it'
>fuck my life
>'you have to fuck my ass instead'
>oh fuck yeah
>shoot a few more blues for good measure
>finally ready for anal fantasy fuck
>had done 80 blues.. that's 2400mg oxycodone IV
>dick was all 'fuck you it ain't happening' no matter what we tried
>fucking disaster, she says she understands and we'll do it tomorrow
>never see her again

>>732837905
That's one way to mentally fuck someone over

Meet a hot chick on the train and get her to come to my booth. Show her my nude modeling pics and put my dick in her mouth. Tell her to go to the bathroom, she lifts dress and I begin to slowly fuck this awesome chick. Few seconds in I smell something awful.... Her pussy smells horrible. Absolutely fucking disgusting, like stepping in fresh dog shit but way more musty and no shit odor. Fills the bathroom so badly that I had to stop because I just could not bring myself to cum. Find out later I have chlamydia. Shall I post her face?

If dubs I will post her face. She didn't say sorry.

>>732852111
>If dubs I will post her face
Not all dubs are trips, but all trips are dubs. Do it nigger.

>>732852111
Fuck, I feel bad so I will give her one more chance.... double dubs and I post her pic.

>>732851982
>she crawls towards me in that weird way people without legs crawls
>gets back on the bed, bites my neck
>weakness
>bulge activates
>she rubs it and herself
>says she needs help getting her jeans off
>literally harder than solving a rubix cube thanks to her wobbly legs
>finally
>she pulls mine down too and immediately gobbles down my cock
>hey this isnt bad for the first time
>"I've never gotten any complaints" she says with a wink
>h o w
>some times later, says her jaws getting tired
>lay down and she mounts me, facing towards me
>thank god
>shes riding on my cock and loving it
>I have no idea how since it feels like mine is in space
>only pleasure i get is my grabbing her ass and moving it so my head keeps going in and out
>"oh shit" she says
cont again

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>>732852244

>>732830715
I once was about to get a blow job, mid tug. She was telling me not to cum in her mouth or on her face. As soon as she said "dont cum on my face" I started cumming the single biggest load I've ever shot. She started crying cause of something about facials. I wasn't paying attention.

>>732852304
OP delivers

was it worth it

>>732842600
Make this man a green lantern!

>>732852304
I actually had one that smelled worse but I didn't get an std from. I literally could not get the fucking fish paste odor off my hand for three days after fucking the land whale though. It was so fucking brutal.

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>>732852374
Yes. I fucking love that chick. She was so cool and sweet as could be, but, a fucking warning is proper!

Me for those wondering...

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>>732852301
>"oh shit oh shit oh shit"
>think shes loving it
>slaps my chest and gets off of me
>tells me to get up
>I do, freaking out like "whats going on??"
>her face is red, tears are streaming
>moves her hand to her backside
>she moves it back to the front with shit in her hand
>pulls a safeway bag from the side of the bed, puts shit in bag
>she has a shit bag
>the only thing im thinking the whole time is "she could have shat on my balls"
>"she almost shat on my balls"
>"my first time having sex and it was with a cripple that shit herself"
>she crawls out of the room embarassed to shower
>I stay in the room, contemplating
>take 30 bucks off her nightstand
>fucking walk to walmart and buy tomodachi life
>take bus home and play it
>one week later fuck friend
>never contacted by crip again

>>732848446
Hey! I live in Salinas CA!

I gave myself balantis because like a fucking idiot I had anal/vaginal sex with my ex but I didn't wash my dick or use a condom when I switched holes smh

>be me, 20 or 21 years
>be at party with a few friends, drunk af
>met girl again i met at first a few years ago, long time no see
>she is a 7.5/10
>she`s there with new bf
>fuckyou.jpg
>i dont care because drunk, go to them, start talk
>bf is a nice guy, we drink some beer
>bitch also in a good mood, more beer
>after some more beer she starts smiling at me when bf doesnt look
>she gets closer to me, but not offensive
>morebeer.avi
>fast forward three hours
>bitch looks at her bf and tells him she needs to talk to me, alone
>bf is a bit confused
>he lookes at me "what should hapen man?"
>me reply "yeah, im not going to fuck her on the toilet or something, lol"
>i fucked her on toilet, cum inside
>fast forward a few minutes
>we`re back at the bar, bf didnt notice a still orders beer
>talking and drinking like nothing happend
>standing a bit after bitch and bf because talking to a fried
>looking at bitches ass, nice ass it is
>wtf wait what is that?
>looks like i didnt cum all inside her
>see cum on the backpocket of her jeans
>her bfs hand is in the pocket, he didnt notice

Worst night ever...

>>732852512
>cont?
Don't be a bitch. Just post the story without asking.

>>732830715
I was guilted into a family obligation, a wedding. My girlfriend didn't want to go. So, I went alone. I was miserable. I hate those things. At the reception, my homely chunky cousin was alone and miserable too. Needles to say, misery loves company, we became drinking buddies for the night at the open bar. We spoke about how weddings suck and poked fun at the whole idea of marriage as it is. We got hammered. Memories got hazy. Hazy memories of making out with someone. Hazier memories of sex. Next memory is clear, hung over, mid-afternoon. 3 alarm faire level hangover. I was naked. Spinning room, look and see homely cousin finishing getting dressed. She said "You took advantage of me. I'm your cousin." I slurred "I what" and got up, with the room spinning, I fell out of bed. She stomped out of the room saying that I was a disgusting drunk. I managed to make it home, keeping that I banged not only a relative, but a downright unfuckable one too. Months later, girlfriend is living with me. She answers the phone. After a bit of a conversation, she walks into living room, punches me, and says that we are through. She left me that hour. Hurt like hell, I was in love by then. Cousin nails me with child support. She was Christian enough to keep the baby, but not Christian enough to NOT get stupid drunk and have premarital sex. Girlfriend left me, family shuns me, I have a reputation as a perv even though my cousin was sober enough to remember every detail of our sex and I don't really even remember I was with her. So, yea, worst sexual experience.

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>>732852512
>>732852740
why delete fam

>>732840534
probably not a great time to use 'bruh'.

>>732852754
Winrar. Jesus

>>732852754
fucking winrar

>>732853026
>>732853095
Silver lining. I'm never guilted into family functions anymore and I never ever ever get THAT drunk anymore.

>>732833298
Not sure but that's where I got mine

>>732852754
and you havent considered suicide?

>>732841853
Are you serious ?

>>732853191
I considered it.

>>732830715

Well my current gf puked all over me while deepthroating my dick. Nothing hardcore here

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still fucking ex.
medium dick.
but hes cute 7/10
lasts 5 minutes if I'm lucky.
always blames me.

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>>732853004

>>732852632

Damn, man, I feel bad for both of you.

>Netherlands
>Very inexperienced with sex.
>Trying to solve that with prostitutes.
>2nd time ever
>Window shopping
>This one girl in a latex nurse outfit... Perfect curves... cute face... nnnng
>"how much"
>"75 euros"
>"normally it's 50"
>"well this is S&M"
>okay whatever my penis is thinking for me
>walk in
>undress etc.
>girl pushes me on the bed
>cuffs me
>he he
>quick BJ, not bad
>spits in my mouth
>what.jpg
>this is fucking disgusting
>it's slimy as fuck
>it tastes like fucking spit
>it's kinda cold somehow
>try to like it
>fail
>going limp
>she gets a vibrator
>"oh no"
>it's literally about the size of a finger
>"eh who knows maybe that's my chance to try this prostate thing"
>my anus instinctively shuts close tighter than the butthole of a paragliding ant
>she tries and tries
>can't fit the fucking thing in

Eventually she just finished me off with a handjob and I left.

>>732852754

Amazing... She raped you, yet you're the bad guy. She has the choice to abort, she chooses to keep it, but you get to pay the bills.

Damn, it feels good to be a member of the ruling patriarchy, eh?

>>732853617
if I were him id flee to another country

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>>732834226
>She starts doing this thing where she doesn't wipe her ass when she knows we're gonna fuck

>>732830715
Realize that she was him.

>>732853696

It's easy to feel smug right now (pats vasectomy scar), but there was a time when that kind of thing could have easily happened to me.

Knowing what I do now, I probably would have donned a black ski mask and "mugged" the cousin until baby is no longer formed.

"Male privilege", my fat, hairy ass.

>>732853617
>it feels good to be a member of the ruling patriarchy, eh?
Yep, just peachy. I'm wondering how my dick even worked at that point, How did I even nut? Disgust makes me not think too hard about it. I did move out of state to restart my life after talking myself out of suicide.

>>732853892

I'm a regular drinker myself, so I know how it goes. I can be blackout-level drunk, but my goddamn dick still works, somehow.

Losing my virginity

>gf has me drive to a "secluded spot"
>turns out not so secluded
>cops show up
>make us get out of car
>they give me all the shit, don't say anything to her
>tell us to go home
>I didn't finish

But everything went better than expected I suppose

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>>732830715
>on 4th date
>making out in her driveway inside my car
>move hand to inner thigh
>she spreads her legs
>start rubbing her crotch with her pants on
>she starts taking them off
>quickly realize my car is too small to fuck in
>move to her bedroom
>eat her out
>she has stubble
>shreds my face
>too nervous to get an erection
>no condom
>spent like ten minutes eating the pussy
>she starts saying she's getting sore
>leave
>next day she just wants to be friends
>don't want that
>dump her completely
>spend next 2 years alone

>>732836749
what a cunt

>>732836749
I feel for you ;_;

>>732839224
How old r u, grill ?

>>732854085
Lost me virginity almost the same

> I was a senior in HS, gf was a couple years younger
> gf was molested by step dad growing up
> basically it progressed till she finally told her mom
> in turn she was dating guys in High School while in Junior High (fucked up I know)
> mainly dated black guys, supposedly got double teamed by her HS bf and his much old brother against her will.
> turns out she went with them willingly.
> she was a cutter, threatened to cut herself if we broke up, I told her to go down the street not across the road.

I didn't know too much about her when we started dating, found out about her reputation shortly after

> before I knew her history
> mostly making out, first time fingering a girl
> she would just reach into my pants and grab my penis and thats it, just grab it
> one day I pick her up in the family Mini-van
> gf has me drive out to middle of fucking no where
> we start making out, things getting hot
> she takes off her shirt
> I start feeling her boobs, she was chesty for a small girl
> eventually we get off my pants, just wants to jump on
> its my first time so we struggle to get it in, I'm 6 inches erect

Cont...

>>732855523
Cont..

> she claimed I was big (guess the black guys in my area were small.... or she lied)
> once we got it in that was it, she didn't want to jump up and down or move for that matter
> tried to lay her down and do her that way
> car was small couldn't maneuver properly (It was my first time and I was dumb)
> she also started having a "flash back" and wanted to run away out of no where (didn't say why)
> eventually give up and take her home.
> on the way home I was flustered, didn't get off, and she was getting sketchy on me
> driving back home I was going very fast and took my eyes off the road
> street went from 2 lanes to 1 lane
> went on the dirt shoulder and started swerving left and right across the road
> freaked out for a good min
> slowly took my foot off the accelerator, had I smashed the brakes I think the van would have flipped
> thankfully it didn't (almost died)

> very nasty break up, she was very manipulative throughout the few weeks we dated
> black guys at my school all wanted to fight me the rest of the year. Never again.

dated a milf for a while shortly after, I was 18 and she was 26.... she taught me a lot

>>732851557
>I felt bad for her being abused, then I got a boner

>got my cock pierced
>piercer says to wait a few days to use it
>next night gf wants to try it out
>she's loving it
>I pull out on bust a huge load all over her stomach
>look down and it's cum mixed with blood clot
>she was less than happy at the sight of that
>even less so when I just laughed it off, handed her a towel, and said "whoops".

>>732852632
I can relate
;-(

It took her two fucking hours to make me nut with her mouth. Probably didn't help she was ungodly fat, but when you're in a drought, your standards are non-existent.

Now I'm not saying she was a little chubby. This bitch was fat to the point that parts of her body looked inhumanly deformed.

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> be african
> go out to local diamond mine
> pick up chick
> take her to my mud hut
> go to rub her pussy a bit
> no clit
> no labia
> don't care
> she's still wet as fuck
> can't afford condom
> fuck her anyway
> severe dick pain
> pull out
> she forgot to take her RapeX out
> go to hospital to get it removed
> get arrested for rape
> sent to prison
> raped by inmates
> catch aids
> catch ebola
> die
> mfe I wuz still a kang

>>732833859
Pussy faggot

Thought I caught something from my ex once. Turns out it was just because I had been sounding my penis lately and it caused my tip to get sore.

Close call.

>>732856285
Happens man, i used to be FWB with a cute goth girl and used to bang her at a park near her place, she gave amazing head, deepthroat, heavy tongue, the works, but 9 times out of 10, i just couldn't nut, even after 40 mins. Usually i'd end up creampie-ing her instead, bullshit about loving to see her dripping my cum. Always made me a little sad that she gave the best head i've ever had and i couldn't feel that sweet, sweet mouth around me while i came =/

>>732831402
TAKE IT WHORE!!!

>>732830715
>Brought a girl to my brother's bedroom
>Fucked her and came
>She started bleeding profusely
>Blood was everywhere, on floor and bedsheets
>Fuck fuck fuck
>Quickly dumped bedsheets into washing machine
>Mopped the floor
>Did it all before mom and bro went home

>be 18, only had sex once prior
>have a huge crush on close friend
>my first actual sexual experience was with her at 15
>did everything but have sex, then my awkwardness killed all the momentum
>still remained good friends
>have to hear her cry and bitch about all the men she sees that fuck her then dump her
>today is particularly bad
>tell her to come to my house, we dont live far from each other
>once there, give her an actual annoyed speech
>calm down and just start hanging out
>somehow get onto how I feel about her
>she knows, and I know she knows
>she asks really softly if I was jealous of them, and I say yes
>she feels shitty about herself, and about me
>to cheer her up, I show her some poems I wrote
>one of them is about her
>one of them is about trying to continue through all the bullshit we put ourselves thru
>I compared her in the poem to something like what DaVinci would've drawn had the Vitruvian Man been a woman
>yeah, I fucking know
>she likes them a lot
>continue to chill and just hang out, she gets closer to me
>its about 6 pm now, and my mother takes my sisters to church
>house to ourselves
>she wants to show me a video about something to do with Tom Waits and John Baldesarri
>watch video in my bedroom, have a laugh
>suddenly making out
>get naked, finally touch that wonderful ass
>smoothly transition to my bed
>I had dreamed about this for months, I was damn near obsessed
>Imagine the concrete realization, the exact reproduction of a fantasy, in every single way, maybe even better
>Icandiehappy.jpg
>get what at that point was the best bj of my life
>eat her out
>get a condom, try to fuck her
>go in
>starts banging her out
>she grabs the bed frame, moans
>hotter than the surface of the fucking sun
>stare at her amazing tits
>kiss her
>about a minute or two in
> about to cum
>I make it awkward, cuz I was nervous
>"no not yet" I mumble over my breath
>she gets awkward
>ask if I can finish
>she says no, but I basically beg, cuz Im so close

Cont.?

>>732833859
>Faggot not greentexting
>Faggot for cheating and not going through with it

>>732834115
You bitched about you being a lil bitch. /4chan

>>732830715
>drunk going down on gf
>pass out with face in pussy
>nice dreams

>>732830715
>>732834763
>>732836665
>>732836770
>>732839789
>>732841217
>>732849841

There's actually 2 kinds of herpes.

>The one that your mother can pass you through kissing when you're a baby, which is fine
>The one that you get on your dick from fucking hobos, which is also fine, unless you're a girl, but who cares about that shit

Got really luck with a 9/10 chick .. got my dick sucked....
2nd date she asks what's the dirtiest thing youve done?

Me.: I fucked a dog once..


Rip entire life I'm retarded for telling any one that but u tards

>>732833859
I never understood people like you. Your dick was in her mouth. You already cheated. What difference would it make if you stuck it in her vagina if it's already been in her whore mouth?

>>732859021
Might as well continue, this thing gets sort of sad

>finally cum
>feel great due to how hard I came
>drive her home, she passes off the awkwardness
>come back home feeling really proud of myself
>then start thinking
>everything was great at that point
>she was single, I had just left a really rocky relationship
>we knew each other well, we liked each other a lot
>in retrospect, if I had paced myself, enjoyed my time with her, instead of rushing into what I wanted, it wouldve been better
>shit, It would've been great
>a real relationship couldve come out of it
>perhaps a short one, but one anyway
>an actual connection with another human being
>or at least, really great sex with someone I cared a lot about, who also cared a lot about me
>keep thinking and realize
>we've used each other
>she was lonely, very self-loathing
>I had no self-esteem, and was angry at the world
>in fact, I had been in loved with her sister for many years, and it got so bad I ended up in a psychiatric ward for risk of suicide
>I had been so angry for so long, at so many things
>its almost as if I had said:
>"I cant have your sister, so instead I'll have you"
>feel like the air just became a blanket of lead around me
>go to sleep with the hollowest feeling I'd had in a while


After that we remained really close anyway, even to this day, when we're both in committed, happy relationships. I still dont know what she thought of me that day, and I wish I knew, and I secretely hope I get another chance, but I dont know if its because of my ego or because there's still some deeper affection in there. I just wish I'd known better, is all.

>>732858958
your fuckin disgusting for fuckin in your brother's bed.

>>732853357
Lol, I had that happen after she ate a shit ton of grapes

>>732830715
>Be me had sex with a girl who did not have a dick.
> Worst experience ever.
> I was shocked when she pulled her pants down and no dick. WTF
> I think /b/ has mislead me

>>732831572
Shit, I hope the ER got your sheets clean.

>>732859483
>>732859021

That... doesn't sound that bad...

I mean

>being in love with the most beautiful face I've ever seen
>done coke with her
>really really drunk
>got a room together
>couldn't get an erection
>dick felt like an overcooked noodle
>so desperate I called room service
>asked for viagra (never took that shit before) and a glass of water
>girl responded they didn't sell pills
>kinda begged for a while
>hung up
>do more coke
>2 minutes later phone rings
>"your viagra is on the way, sir"
>feeling nervous, never had that before, and suspected my heart would explode if I mixed drugs
>pride wins, took that pill
>did nothing, penis still dead
>we went to sleep... at least she was having a good time, anyways, she said

>>732859787
that is pretty shitty

also yeah, you could've legit died. Viagra is a vasoconstrictor, and coke raises your hear rate through the roof. Maybe you were just too drunk?

Did you get another chance later anon?

>Having sex with gf (now ex)
>She doesn't take the pill because of reasons
>We always use condoms
>This time too, keep that in mind
>For reasons unknown i nut after like one minute
>...and i was inside of her, with the condom still on
>Mfw never happend to me to cum so quickly
>Whatever
>GF asks what happened
>"I came, don't know w...""YOU DID WHAT?!?"
>Gf starts to cry and scream uncontrollably, no matter how many times i explained her that the prime purpose of condoms is to contain sperm in case you come inside
>Therefore, the risk of her being pregnant is very low
>Cries
>Screams
>Cries
>Screams
>Eventually she calms down, we check the condom, still worried
>After two weeks she gets her period
>Noshit.exe
>Had to cuddle all afternoon after that

>>732833537
There's a stigma because it's disgusting and the world would be a better place if you filthy carrier shites would just kill yourselves.

>>732831572
Holy shit that sucks

>>732859787
>>732859483

Part II:

>few days later went to work
>a co-worker of mine was really good friend with this girl
>my co-worker was dating another co-worker
>everyone at work knew about my flacid action
>worst week of my life^2

Expansion pack:

>two weeks later
>she invites me to her house
>we get drunk, have a good time
>suddenly I'm teaching her to fight (I don't really know how to fight, but it was fun)
>we get more and more naked, for no reason
>we laugh a lot
>we get tired of "fighting", so we go to the bed
>she grabs my dick
>entirely flacid again
>she fake-sleeps
>I fake-sleep
>the day after "we don't remember anything"

She's a friend of mine now... we don't fuck anymore (well, technically we never did), but everything is good. However, everytime I look her in the eyes I remember all the drama.

>>732859950

You've got it too, fucking hypocritical fuck. Difference is: NO ONE WANTS TO FUCK YOU.

>>732859899
Had another chance... also blew it

Alcohol+pressure is not a good combination

Has anybody else had a problem with slobber?
I was kissing this one girl who just kept slobbering.
Like not just a little - like all down her shirt like a st. bernard.
I had to call it off. She was getting me soaked.

>>732840666
Devil trips for ruining a girls life

>>732860171
Stop fucking down syndromes.

>>732830715
Her: Is it in?
Me: I'm done already.

>>732830715
This one
https://youtu.be/2fV1EOQN_rI

>>732843111
KEK
>my bad

>>732859899
btw, I don't think they sent me viagra... they probably gave me some ibuprofen, as a placebo.

But yeah, I was feeling so ashamed at the time that dying wasn't really the worst option available

>>732859729
gay

>>732830715

>>732831572

I fucking hate cleaning my sheets in the ER

>>732836020
i don't get it, why did you marry her after taking her to get an abortion?

>>732852754
Depending on how young the baby is, you should consider killing it. You'll only get about 5 years in prison while child support could go on for 19 1/2 years. You do the math. It might be cheaper to just kill it.

>>732830715
>There was this smoking hot black girl with enormous tits.
>When I first met her, she told me she was pregnant so I used to cum in her bareback on the regular.
>She stayed over every night for a week, but then she started getting clingy, calling me "daddy" after knowing me for less than two weeks, so I was like "This is fun, but you're not my girlfriend."
>we see each other less, but hook up on occasion
>she has the kid
>whenever I have sex, she complains about the condoms I insist on wearing.
>she starts saying racist shit about black people all the time, even saying she wants a surgery to bleach her sin
>she just has a thing for white guys and must want to have my baby

>one night, we're fucking at her place (which is a pain because her baby doesn't always sleep through the night) and she starts complaining about the condom again.
>i go from hard to 80% hard because of her complaints
>I pull out of her at one point and she yanks the condom off my dick
>it was my last condom
>i bitch about it, but troll over and start jerking off
>she starts yanking on my hands to stop me, saying "babe, stop"
>I'm like, "I need to cum"
>she says "cum in me"
>I'm not raising a kid with this woman
>whenever I get close to cumming, she stops me and starts bitching
>I try my best to stay latched onto her beautiful big tits while jerking off
>this went on for hours

This kind of stuff happened often. The boobs had me coming back, though. I don't miss her, but I do miss that body.

>>732834115
Lmao is this that one gril I kno?
KH?

>be me 21 with gf after club. I started having sex and accidentally fucking her ass
>we both drunk and she was ok with it.
>after a few minutes i fall asleep with hard penis still in ass. Wake up next day penis still hard and inside ass. I pull out and just go about my business.
>gf calls me later and said she tried taking a shower but her hand kept on faling inside her asshole and was scared. Asshole will not close .
I laughed ao had and paid no mind. It was a good night though

When one with endometriosis coughed during sex and I got painfully bent by her muscles. Either that or the time I accidentally smashed a girl's head into a table because she was trying to force me and I had a headache. It was a bedside table and I'm a big dude so when I pushed her off me she went up pretty high and just crashed right into it. Then I freaked out because I thought I would have to take her to the hospital.
Another bad thing that happened was when I tried none latex condoms and got a size too small. It got stuck on me and caused a priapism. I had to cut the tip off and rip it. Almost went to the ER over that shit, but it was only a 5 minute after sex ordeal. Fucking trogans. They know that non latex doesn't stretch like latex and diameter matters, but who the fuck measures that? It should come in a multi size pack with a tape measurer.

>be dating girl
>kinkiest girl I've ever dated
>willing to try anything
>in bed one night fooling around and she tells me she wants to try a piss enema
>first time for everything I guess
>fuck her ass, cum and wait a minute or so
>still in her ass and I start pissing
>she's telling me how warm it feels
>I stop and tell her I'm going to pull out so she can clench her ass shut
>pull out and her ass explodes a fountain of liquid shit
>she jumps off the bed and runs to the bathroom using both hands to try to keep her ass shut
>she's leaving little hansel and gretel shit crumbs all the way to the bathroom
>slams the door shut
>I strip my bed so I can incinerate the sheets
>start cleaning the rug with disinfectant wipes
>noises coming from the bathroom sound like a bear drowning in the toilet
>few minutes later gf comes out, quickly gets dressed and leaves without saying a word
>never returns my calls/texts