ylyl thread, OC edition, I'll start this off with a pre-written greentext, just wait for the end, it's worth it.
This is a tinder story.
>be at work, browsing tinder
>match with chubby mid 30's cunt with kids, going through a divorce
>asks me my weight, send her a shirtless pic
>sends me address of her hotel, asks me how long til I can be there
>I'm at work, it's midnight, tell her i can be there when I get off at 6 AM
>she says thats not fast enough
>I tell her in the next 30 minutes
>i immediately go on break
>drive to hotel, let me friends on discord know that I'm meeting tinder whore to uncuck myself
>they tell me not to go, i could get raped
>some egg me on
>I pull up, she tells me her room number
>the way shes talking makes me suspicious
>i decide fuck it, I'm going in, do it for the meme.
cont?
>>732413412
cont.
>I'm in the hotel lobby
>ask the man at the front desk a question
>"Where is room 143? Is it in this building?"
>He looks at me blankly before answering
>"Yes."
>a long pause, felt like minutes, probably only seconds
>"Well where is it?"
>"What's your name?"
>"Anon."
>he typed my name into his computer
>It's not showing up with any rooms
>"Your name isn't in here. Do you know the name of the person you're meeting here?"
>"no... I'll just have them come get me."
>pull out phone and predetermined that if this lady was real, she would be a landwhale.
>decide that when I see her, I would yell "DAMN YOU A FAT BITCH" and run
>I text her to come get me
>about 3 minutes later the whole building starts to shake
>as she waddles to the front desk, the glass windows start to crack
>she can see that I'm nervous
>"First time?"
>fuck man, play it cool.
>"nah."
>>732413450
cont.
>she walks me to her room
>I enter the room, scared it's a set up and I'm about to be raped by a nigger
>She locks the door behind us after we enter.
>"Can I check the closets and room?"
>"Hehe, go ahead, I understand."
>check the bathroom and closet, it's all empty
>she sits on one side of couch, the other side pops up
>I sit on the high end to bring it back down
>she starts to talk to me
>"So you're on break right now?"
>"Yeah."
>"So you're in a hurry?"
>"Not really."
>"You like older women?"
>Of course not you dumb cunt, you just happen to have a vagina and you're easy "Yeah."
>"Lots of younger boys like older women."
>she goes on about all the young men she has fucked ever since her husband initiated the divorce
>The clock is ticking, I'm already late getting back to work from break
>I make the first move
>I climb this mountain of a woman to reach her lips and we start making out
>she fucking straddles me
>lungs losing out on air
>getting weaker and weaker, I move this to the bed
>I suck on her titties
>I pull down her panties and start licking her pussy
>tastes a bit like stale piss
>shes obviously drunk, moaning a ton as a result
>eventually I pull my cock out and climb mt Everest again
>push my noodle into one of her caves
>so loose, feel like an explorer
>proceed to pump for about a minute
>cum immediately cause I imagine I'm pumping someone thinner and hotter
>keep humping cause I like to service m'ladys
>she moans for me to go slower
>proceed for about 3 more minutes, have to stifle my laughter
>I had my mic on my phone enabled in the discord server the whole time
>about 15 friends/strangers are listening to me pump a landwhale
>phone is literally buzzing nonstop from notifications
>shove face in landwhales tits so she doesn't see me laughing
>>732413491
cont.
>after a few more minutes, remember I have work
>I get off her, she slips under blankets, expecting me to cuddle
>women always want to fucking cuddle after fucking
>i just put on my clothes
>I grab my phone that's still buzzing off the hook
>I unsilence it and say
>"Can you guys hear me?"
>a girl says "Yeah?"
>everybody else is shooshing one another
>I look the landwhale dead in the eyes with the phone in front of my mouth, she can hear every single word
>I continue to stare her in the eyes and say
>"You know what they call me? They call me the minute man"
>the entire discord voice chat bursts out in laughter
>She's got this confused look on her face
>I turn around, unlock the door, and sprint outta there
>It's raining once I get outside
>I have been rebirthed by God himself
>Thank you mother nature
>She texts me a few minutes later calling me an asshole
>She tells me she's got herpes
>I tell her I've already got em
>She texts back "Do you really?"
>She's clearly worried, I called her out on her bluff with my own bluff
>dumb bitches gonna be bitches
>mfw the whole thing was recorded
>mfw I have the link to the recording
>mfw I always go back every few weeks to listen to it all over again.
I'll post the link if there's any interest.
>>732413523
forgot the pic for MFW
Let's hear it anon, I'm intrigued
>>732413412
Post it or I don't believe you...
>if real fucking hell that is glorious
Even if fake it's a great story
>>732413880
ssame here lol
>>732413838
bump
>>732413523
ok here's the link
https://soundcloud.com/user-458703355/dude-bangs-tinder-whore-on-discord
>>732414774
Fucking hilarious
>>732414774
11/10 bro
best OC ive seen in a while
>>732414774
>>732414774
>https://soundcloud.com/user-458703355/dude-bangs-tinder-whore-on-discord
holy fuckin sht dude
well done, great OC
minute man is at 18 min about for the ADD faggits
>>732414774
OP, you are a true hero, thanks for the massive laughs and well fucking done.
OP you fucking legend
>>732414774
holy fuck bro you're a fucking champion
http://www.harleyzone.com:80 funniest site you get
shut up minute man ur a pedo
Toasting un epic bread
OP....just started listening now....this is some ate up shit man. You are awesome. Thanks for the post...coolest shit I have seen in awhile.
btw...if you could draw a picture of her somehow that would be awesome.
>>732414774
I showed my roommate this thread, he lost it too, i'm still laughing, fuckin hell.
if this gets capped add me
>>732414774
youre a god among men
You need to post your discord. Your fucking legend.
>>732421915
wXAwm <--- discord
there you go.
>>732414774
Fucking amazing
>>732414774
the absolute madman
Post a pic of the whale tho? doesn't have to be lewd
Witness history. The Minute Man was here.
>>732414774
>you know what they call me?
> The Minute Man
fucking kek
/sh/hw7eqjk3vizs76j/AACmwrNJgyTbtr-cCs9issk9a?dl=0
ayyy lmao
>>732414774
"you know what they call me? they call me the minute man"
Holy shit I pissed my pants
>>732422244
lmao what is this discord
>>732414774
>>732413412
Show her pic. We can judge how fat she is for ourselves. Just blur out her face if you really want to protect her identity.
>>732414774
Any pics of her?
You are a true hero dude
Holy fucking shit dude, good job. LOOOL
>>732413412
Kek. Minute Man.
KEK op is a legend
Screen capture this plz
>>732425680
Way ahead of you bud
>>732414774
YOU FUCKING LEGEND
Sempai, add me in the screenshot for r/4chan.
>>732425887
No.
>>732414774
>https://soundcloud.com/user-458703355/dude-bangs-tinder-whore-on-discord
You're my hero
>>732425887
lost fucking instantly, what the fuck is that shit
>>732425933
>>732425933
lol
>>732425887
Kys fur fag
>>732426342
Put me in the Screencap
12/10, today OP was not a fagot, but a legend
>THEY CALL ME THE MINUTE MAN
>Runs away at mach speed
>minute man
>>732425887
>>732414774
it's cool that it happened, but how is this funny? It's closer to cringe than anything else
Thank you OP.
Haven't had this much fun in a thread for a while.
>>732426722
Legendary.
Yes my child, destroy that whale pussy
>>732413523
Did I hear minute man?
>>732413412
This was great.
>>732427233
fucking LOST
fuck. i can't breath.
>>732413412
Shit, your lucky that you can even meet up with older women on tinder. I swear when I go on there they are all my age and when I change the age range there is practically no one over 30
>>732427233
LOL
WHAT IS WITH THIS MEME
>>732421105
Inb4 drawn Jabba The Hut
>>732414774
Lost
Well done OP
>Minute Man
History is born. 13/10
>says its for a meme
>actually desperate enough to fuck and eat out a landwhale for "a meme"
>desperate enough to lie to yourself to think lowering yourself to this level is ok
MFW
Good to know that there are still actual, genuine retards on this planet of ours.
>>732428554
Some people just cant see the good things in life
>>732414774
You will be remembered by generations OP
>>732428673
>doing anything sexual with a landwhale
>doing it for a meme
>"the good things in life"
Man, you must be fucking retarded.
>>732414774
i fuckin keked
what city is this in?
asking for a friend obviously
>>732414774
HO LEE SHIIIIIT!
I have witnessed the Minute Man, I can't wait to see this screencap and send my sides into deep space. 11/10
I have witnessed the Minute Man, I can't wait to see this screen cap and send my sides into deep space again holy shit. 11/10
>>732413412
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xzzdfn-KSNg
>>732413412
ahhahahahahahahahaahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahaha
>>732413412
You have a wife¿¿?
Love this, OP. Thanks for some original lulz
>>732425887
I really like this image.
anyone else find this not funny? just some young dumbass who went to a hookup and made a fool of himself. at least that woman was honest and just wanted to fuck, like adults do, for whatever reason, and she got a shaggy-sounding highschooler with a discord app on his phone...it was sad more than anything else.
you cheated on your wife for this shit?
Cant hear shit 2/10 m8
>>732414774
Lost so fucking hard , cheers op
>>732414774
No fucking way...
this is nice
what has the world come to when we have fat whores like this passing themselves around on tinder like this
Shit man, long live OP!
>>732426964
>I-its closer to cringe amirite guys?
No. It's actually hilarious.
>>732428800
Dont sound too jealous now anon.
Today we witnessed greatness
>>732431909
Douches gunna Douche
>>732414774
Today OP wasn't a faggot
>>732413412
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2w-ckPmjHU
genius
>>732428554
This is true, though I also found his story funny
>>732413412
My only question after all of this, do you actually have Herpes?
>>732431909
What level white knight are you? What's your raid gear like? Epic mount?
>>732431909
Yeah, sounds like another epic trolle along with a choir of laughing dumbfucks, but whatever makes you happy.
>>732413412
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9liXs7sKQw
OP you glorious son of a bitch
>>732431909
The guy is an asshole but its funny. The woman should not feel ashame. She just fucked a kid. The joke is part of the game
>>732431909
>fat girl get sex with some young guy
>young guy pleasures "landwhale who's pussy taste like piss"
>live streams it
>texts her bullshit after
so she's at loss because she had her moans streamed
he's winning despite having to lick a dirty pissmound of a pussy?
aside from just observing the misery I don't really get the joke.
Why op this is not kind to do
>>732414774
Lost so hard.
The minute man part was fucking hilarious.
>>732413491
Please post it
>>732414774
Put me in screenshot
>>732413412
add me in the screencap
God damn,
Kek! Way to go OP!
add me in the screencap
Join the discord niggers
For the love of KEK, someone cap this!
>>732414774
i wittnesed the birht of minute man!
>>732414774
>>732414774
GUYS SOMEONE SCREENCAP THIS SHIT, IT'S GOING DOWN IN HISTORY
>PUT ME IN THE SCREENCAP
Pls add me in screen cap
>>732414774
the minute man shall live forever
>>732414774
11/10 would kek again, the fuckin glory the best oc are true oc
> today op was a legend
>>732414774
Caption it anons!
Holy fucc
>>732413412
Gg OP
>>732428554
This is the grim reality, butt fuck it dude another human life wasted lol
>>732414774
Is it funny because he fucked a fat girl or because the fat girl got "minute man'd" last minute?
>>732413412
it was posted yesterday already, its even on front page of /r/4chan...
>>732439494
https://www.reddit.com/r/4chan/comments/6ardje/robot_goes_to_tinder_date/
>>732439494
https://www.reddit.com/r/4chan/comments/6ardje/robot_goes_to_tinder_date/
>>732414774
Shits cash anon, put me in the screencap
PUT ME IN THE SCREENCAP
>>732413523
You sound like a terrible being. hopefully somebody shoots you while robbing the mcdonalds where you work.
One day this screenshot will be posted in prove you're an oldfag threads
>>732414774
this killed me
>>732438907
>Golden snatch
ftfy
>>732413523
lmfao they call me the minute man HAHAHA
>>732425965
nice feet
>>732413412
instead you should just
> S и αp chαtd .com
and leak all your snapchat sluts
>>732414774
>Preston Garvey and his shenanigans
>>732414774
>My sides!
Fucking lost immediately.
The minute man is born 9000/10
You did a good thing, op, giving Amy Schumer a quick lay. Really took one for the team.
Kek'd so much I almost shit - legend op
>>732414774
put me in the fucking screencap and I'll give you all the minutemans blessing
>>732442038
refer to this screencap from yesterday that is in reddit front page of 4chan
>>732439933
>>732414774
OP my fucking sides are in another dimension
Posting in legendary thread.
Pic semi related
I WAS HERE
THE MINUTE MAN
>>732444210
AMAZING
posting in epic thread
This isnt oc, was posted yesterday, op is fag
https://youtu.be/8Dkmw5_p1wM
SO is this a scam thread or fucking what?
>>732414774
HOLY FUCK KEK
The soundcloud link says it's 4 months old.. u guise r so fukn dum
>>732414774
OP, this made my day
Great fucking kek
Thanks for the laughs OP
fat boys get jumped.
>>732428000
trips checked
Good job OP
>>732428864
>12 year old kids don't fall in love
Fucking homeschooled freaks.
>>732428554
it's okay to laugh at retards wasting their lives
that's one of the main functions of /b/
>>732439880
shut up faggot.
>>732414774
holy shit my sides
Top kek
>>732413412
Maximum kek
>>732414774
>>732414774
Thinking it was a made up story the whole time, well done
>>732414774
omg you fucking hero
Legend
Posting in epic bread
>>732447784
always cracks me up
>>732413412
will always remember this day, also obligatory, pics of this milf?
>>732414774
Haha fucking minute man will live forever
>>732413412
OP is a fucking god, holy shit.
>>732422244
Expired?
>>732414774
>>732427578
Amazing
>>732414774
∞ / 10
would kek again
LEGENDARY
>>732425887
nice feet
Good job OP. You made everyone think this pasta is actually something you did.
>>732414774
bwahAHahahahaHahhaaaaa
>>732451730
i don't get it
>>732428554
Lol, us men are animals we will fuck everything. /Thread
>>732428800
He got laid, and he's got the respect of the faggots who live here - so he's 2 points in the lead over you pal.
I might be thick but I dont get the joke, a fat landwhale got to bang and get eaten out by a much younger kid and somehow she should feel bad because he recorded her moaning? if it was me I wouldnt care since I got to bang a young chick out of my league and the only thing she got out of it is a recording of my sexnoice
>>732414774
Legend
Toasting to an epic bread.
>>732414774
Fucking mint
You bunch of fucking idiots, this wasn't from OP, this is copypasta.
>>732414774
>>732413412
>>732413450
>>732413491
>>732413523
This isnt your OC you fucking faggot.
>>732427578
He's the 30 minute man
Add me in screencap!
5/13/17. The day OP delivered.
>>732414774
>>732413523
>>732413491
>>732413450
>>732413412
I turned off Wagner's Tannhauser orchestra to listen to this masterpiece
Just when I'm about to give up on you, 4chan, you go ahead and do something like this.
AND TOTALLY REDEEM YOURSELF!
You're a legend, OP.
>>732414774
Fucking made my day.
>>732414774
HE IS BLASTING OFF, THE MINUTEMAN! PUT ME IN THE SCREENCAP!!!
>>732413412
Why the fuck is everybody begging to be in the screen cap?
>>732425887
Nice feet
>>732414774
>https://soundcloud.com/user-458703355/dude-bangs-tinder-whore-on-discord
the minute man is a meme for the ages
>>732414774
never have i thought i would live to see the day OP Delivered
>>732414774
FAKE AND GAY
Donald belongs in the screen cap
>>732414774
POSTING IN EBIN THREAD
its from a MILF porno you faggots
>>732424133
lol hard-on
>>732413412
Good job browsing leddit fag.
>>732438050
nice
>>732414774
MFW listening to this
the 13 hour lasting ylyl thread
god bless you OP
>>732460526
Add me in Screencap
caturday
add the bananananner too.
More OC here https://youtu.be/Wb4AGEKJjqU
>>732414774
good luck making a screencap outta this
include me tho
how many replies here are samefagging, anyway? so much begging to be in a screencap.
samefagging to the max.
>>732413412
Op is a Faggot
more caturday right atcha
13 hour banana thread
Wow, this thread is still up?
>>732414774
absolute toppest of keks
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3FvFG5BXS-ISO5mebtLTtw
can some kind anons please subscribe to my youtube channel i need 1000 so i can livestream in the future. i have autism and ive been on b since 2006
>>732414774
"They call me the minute man"
HAHAHAHAHA fucking comedy gold
>>732461938
I got u fam
Kek saw that Story Like 2 houres ago
Nice copypasta op
>>732414774
Nicely done
Holy shit this is a good meme
>>732414774
My sides transcended the 8th dimension
>>732423898
you must be new
>>732414774
OP U MADMAN
>>732414774
madlad
Can I be in screen cap if there's one?
>>732413412
Toasting in epic fucking bread! Long live the minute man!
>>732414774
BRUH
>>732414774
Bravo OP
>>732413412
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00e41pD4TJ0
POSTING IN LEGENDARY THREAD
>>732428554
Someone gotta make OC son.
>>732448417
lel
>>732414774
toasting in epic bread
Best OC for a long time. GG OP
>>732414774
Oh shit
Include me in the screen cap
Here's a base line if someone wants to take it from here.
Fucking beautiful
Press F to pay respect to the Minute man!
>>732414774
Legend
>>732433030
It's stupid. I can't believe you faggots find this funny. He ate out a gross lamdwhale for a "lel funny meme joke". Then again, you are the same faggots that post logs and bananas everywhere. Sage.
>>732414774
Holy kek this is amazing, put me in the cap
>>732414774
Put me in the screencap or your mother will die in her sleep tonight.
>>732414774
Legendary
>>732414774
Holy fucking shit. Best fucking thread in a long time. Jesus fucking Christ I love you.
Put me in the fucking cap this is top shelf kek
>>732414774
Put me in cap
>>732414774
rofl
Just finished listening to it. Pretty cringe worthy shit tbqh.
Holy shit this is so good
>>732414774
L E G E N D A R Y
>>732414774
Toasting in dank bread papa bless
>>732473263
>L E G E N D A R Y
That was such a lame encounter. But I guess a btard actually getting laid for 20 seconds counts as legendary