What's keeping you from killing yourself, /b/?

>>732219230
That. I won't die before I fucked something like that

>>732219328
lol if you do your rectum will be the only thing dying, in prison.

Finger boxes

>>732219328
word

The fact that i'm travelling round Southeast Asia for the third time next week.
Feelsgoodman.

>>732219230
The sad thing is that it is not seen as a mental disease yet a it's one of the many mental troubles

i will be dead in some years anyway

i loss nothing staying alive because my end game is being dead anyway.

That I'll go to hell.

>>732219404
>9404▶
>>>732219328
>lol if you do your rectum will be the only thing dying, in prison.
why the fuck would he go to prison?

Not a trap, that's Kayla.

Living is a hassle but I haven't the energy to off myself

I don't know. Fear, I guess. Empathy for my girlfriend and family. Can't have two suicides in the family within a year, lol.

Nobody else would take care of my dog properly.

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>>732219230
>i just want my son back
Damn. Right in the feels.

>>732219230
Not keeping anything lethal around for when I have suicidal episodes.

>>732219328

this

The way I see it, I'm going to die anyway for some retarded reason. So I might as well play life like a game for doing the things I like.

I am not out anything but I lose my progress if I kill myself now.

She looks qt af, who is she?

>>732219643

This could not be more true to how I feel
I don't want them having to deal with the suffering of my death. If I could die and it would be like I never existed, then I would totally do it

Stubbornness/determination, and my 9 y/o kid. Otherwise, with my life insurance policy, my wife would be better off.

Fear of missing out.

That I'll chicken out or fuck up. I would need a clean, easy suicide.

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>>732220235

>>732220119

This is literally never true.

In your self-pity party you imagine nobody would be affected by your death, but the truth is your wife and kid would be forever fucked up by it.

Go talk to some family members of people who have killed themselves and get over yourself.

>>732219230
Weed and my ambitions to better myself.
Besides, I've never tried opium, so there's always that.
Always felt like Doap Nixon said it best: "I aint scared of death, I'm scared to live wanting to die"

Just like ALL of you, I'm not really suicidal.

>>732219778
anythings lethal if you're brave enough

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>>732219230
I want to see the end of Berserk.

an hero is the highest form of faggotry and is only desirable for emo losers suffering from first world problems

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I see no reason what so ever to live. I am a nihilist. I've come to the conclusion that since there is no point in living, there's no reasonable point in dying either. My existence is quite and utterly painful at times, and I've come to accept that it'll most likely be like that for as long as I live. In my youth I had several attempts at ending my life, but always chickened out in the last second due to the small chance that I would not succeed, and in the attempt be stuck in a even more meaningless existence due to severe brain injury. In my opinion it's worth giving life a shot, it doesn't matter what you do anyway. If you have people in your life that consider you close, you'll at the very least give them a "less unpleasant" life simply by staying alive. I've come to realize that always expecting the worst in any given situation makes for a few pleasant surprises every now and then. It's a drop of piss in a reservoir of decomposing human excrement I know, but I for once would stick my tongue out in anticipation of the dankest drop of piss as I am more in favor to that than it all being shit.

>>732220747
>emo losers suffering from first world problems
Kind of this. People in parts of the world where life is substantially shitter don't kill themselves as much.

>>732219230
I still have to kill more.
37 more it seems.

>>732219328
Never gona happen

>>732219487
Shut up faggot noone likes you.
validate nowhere

I'm into some really bad shit, fapping to kids and stuff. Never done anything in real life, never even looked at kiddie porn or anything. It's all just sick fantasies in my head.

I found out a few years ago that my grandfather had molested his daughters, including my mother. I guess this shit is genetic or something. So I want to take myself out before I do anything. I met with a funeral director a few months ago and planned everything out. Now I just want to save up enough money so I can pay those expenses. Then... bye.

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>>732220848
but niggers in poor countries can't relate to the horror and pain of living an comfortable life with a roof over your head, food in your kitchen and being able live your life any way you choose too.

>>732220547
This
truly being suicidal is killing yourself, never looking back.

>>732220999
Good job
>proudofyou.jpg

>>732221026
tbh this. they probably think that their life, as it is, is their destiny and don't doublt it.

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>>732221026
To be fair some suicidal people may have good reasons, but yes most are just having a wank and looking for pity.
>>732221027
Exactly. If they were serious then they wouldn't write an essay about how sad they are and post it on here; they'd just do it.

>>732219230
Putting the fuck on you, OP

>>732221266
Like my friend who tried literally 3 or 4 times and counting.
he is literally suicidal. Needs pills.
Forgets to take um, he will hang himself or scratch his neck until its bleeding.

>>732221266
suicide is the extreme version of running away from your troubles. everything is fixable, even shitty attitude.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5RH3BdXDOY

>>732219230
I live on to to make sure op nows hes a lame faggot

>>732221615
*knows

>>732221420
To be honest it sounds like he's more of a pity case and isn't that serious about it or he would have been successful by now.
>>732221485
>everything is fixable
No, that just simply is not true. Sometimes there isn't an eraser big enough for your mistakes.

>>732221646
absolutely bullshit. all you need is to shut up & nut up. you can fix anything you want, question is do you want to fix it or not?

>>732221136
I fucking hate that I turned out this way. I mean, there's a part of me that's normal and good. I wish I could meet a nice girl and start a family and shit. But I don't know what causes people like me to cross that line. What if I do have a kid and I do cross the line?

I've had people suggest I go to therapy, but really? I mean, come on. There's no treatment for this shit. And even if there was, what if I my family and friends found out somehow? No one would want anything to do with me ever again.

I know my parents and friends and stuff will be sad when I'm gone, but killing myself really is the only choice.

>>732221845
You've comitted some kind of horrible crime. I don't know, rape or murder or some shit... A bunch of times. You're a monster.
Go on, nut up and fix that.

>>732219230

Only my cowardice is keeping me alive tbh.

>>732221845
Let say you accidentally took some poison that will kill you in an hour VERY painfully, how do you fix that?

i have a hope that one day i will experience what the normies call "sex"
or at least be somewhat loved by another human being

>>732222413
then devote your life to make up for that crime by doing good deeds. it won't undo the past, but it can make up for some of the bad, which is the right thing to do when you fuck something up, unless you're a selfish coward

>>732222648
that is just a poor hypothetical example

>>732222786
That'd be like putting a band aid on a gaping wound.

>>732222786
>that is just a poor hypothetical example
That poison thing has happened for real thought.
Or how about that guy who got massive amount of radiation and suffered like mofo before his dead? how do you fix that?

Cause I'm supposed to be alive for now.

>>732222222

Too many good games I need to play. After that, life's done

>>732222860
no, that be like driving the person you wounded to the hospital so a doctor can sew him up.

>>732222891
once again, a poor example, for the purpose of justifying being a pussy

>>732222222

>>732222935
Seems kind of pointless after doing something so bad though. Nothing's going to wash away knifing the guy. Even if you don't die yourself, your life is still over for having done it.

>>732222935
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJ61YxShVHY
So how do you fix this?

I want to eat an African child, it's the last thing on my bucket list.

>>732222996
that's what selfish, lazy people say to avoid making an effort to repent their errors.

>>732223074
once again, poor, over-the-top example.

>>732219230
Because shit almost looks like it can get better from here. And I don't want the only mark I leave on this world to be the pain that would put my gf through.

>>732223226
I can't tell if you're trolling or just a dick. Some things, not all, but some are bad enough that you cannot make ammends. No matter how hard you try.

>>732223226
You can't fixanything by moving goalposts you nigger.

>>732223226
Underage retard
>nut up, howbohdat

>>732219230
xenophobia

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>>732223492
Because hell is full of niggers and spics?

>>732223706
it has more meanings than racism
like the fear of the unknown

>>732223445
is it better to not make amends? to do a bad thing and then just quit, like a pussy? you can't repair everything, put you can make an effort to try

>>732223456
i didn't say you can fix everything, i said your should try (see the answer above)

>>732223478
the only ones that throw around "underage" as an insult, are usually little kids under thirty.

>>732223831
Brb, taking everything seriously.

>>732223852
>is it better to not make amends?
I'm not saying there's anything wrong with trying for minor things; I'm just saying that sometimes if you do something bad enough there is no unringing that bell and you might as well not bother/just cop your punishment.

>>732223948
bc i'm an edgy teen posting anonymously on the web

>>732223852
>>732224014
Or in this case, if a person just realised all of that and killed themself because they knew their life was over at that point.

>>732223852
You come across as a clueless 15 year old who's "got life all figured out".
If you're not underage, you're just really fucking stupid.

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>>732219230
I hope my Dad doesn't feel this way about me

>he probably does
>feels

>>732224014
but like i said, i'm not talking about extreme, hypothetical scenarios.

>>732224078
that's called being a coward.

>>732219230
It takes too much effort. It's inevitable that we die eventually. Living is just as pointless. Don't want to upset people with my death. Don't have any guaranteed methods available. Can't browse 4chan as easily. You faggots make my life much more bearable.

OP sucks cocks.

>>732221845
>you can fix anything you want
>>732223852
>i didn't say you can fix everything

inb4 I was only pretending to be retarded

>>732224209
do you know what figure of speech means?

>>732224163
I am though. Because you said everything is fixable and everything encompasses all scenarios; including extreme ones.

>>732224395
Yes, but you obviously don't.

>>732224112
Same. Like on the surface we have a good relationship but I feel like he resents that I'm trans.

>>732224649
On the surface we don't have a good relationship but I really hope he doesn't resent that I'm trans

That I'm still really young and it would be stupid not to give life a chance

>>732219409
The skub weasel is extinct now. How do go back to skubless? I've heard some people cope with synthetic skub but it feels like some sort of abomination.

>>732219230
Don't know. I guess i would want to be happy for once before i an hero. I mean, im 20yo and felt like shit for most of my life, but what's the point of calling it quits right now without experiencing some nice things (or doing some fucked up shit before kys).

Shit i study/field i work in sucks, got a major test incoming in 2-3 months where i have to write 20 pages and do a presentation on a randomly assigned topic in under 8 hours (without online ressources) and im pretty sure i will fuck this up.

Still haven't figured what i want to do in my life, but the thought of working 9 to 5 for the rest of my life just to be able to live comfortably sucks all motivation out of me.


sideinfo:
>met about 10 girls in the past 3 months, hooked up with a few of them but have no contact with all but one who is kinda cool (we usually just joke around and send eachouther memes)
>most of them were really boring or at least we didn't 'click' and had pretty much nothing to talk about

Met a girl 4 weeks ago, got my contact info from tinder. Met a few times, talked for hours - felt pretty great. Felt like talking to someone who you knew your whole life.


So the girl i met 4 weeks ago, lets call her S.
>she wants to take it slow
>we talked about relationships for a bit, she just got out of a 1,5 year relationship
>last half year was long distance as her ex moved to germany
>anyway, met a few times, always cuddling, listening to music and talking for hours
>kissing her felt, ugh, i can't even describe it properly
>it was like if every piece finally clicked together, so warm and fuzzy and just sweet and perfect
>it's LITERALLY the first time i felt emotions in the past 10 years
>actually getting out of bed after my alarm goes off, usually i'd just lie there and wonder why i didn't just die in my sleep

>>732224625
no, you're a grammar nazi. you missed my point

>>732224812
I completely repress that I'm trans and so far my life isn't that horrible

Just the occasional breakdown that's all

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>>732225426
I'm happy for you anon

good luck

>>732226085
I want to kill myself every day as a result of it

Got prescribed anti-depressants today

>>732225426
>>732225426
>hanging around
>friend of mine got a hoodie from one of her favorite bands with all autographs
>he wants to sell it but yeah, neither she nor i had cash at that moment
>idea.jpg
>friend and i skate, sometimes we do skate bets

>i wanna bet for the hoodie, but he tells me to go suck a dick
>damn
>we bet for beer, drink a few
>he says we can bet for that hoodie BUT.. the person who lost needs to shave his hair ONLY in the middle and leave it like that for 2 days

At this point we were both tipsy, but my tolerance is a bit better. The thing is, he was about to shave his head completly anyway - and he can do a lot more skate tricks anyway.

tl;dr
>i somehow managed to win, but i broke my deck and twisted my ankle
>he got a new haircut
>anyway, me and S go to my place
>we talk, cuddle, kiss
>give her the hoodie, she is like no she can't and gives me a kiss
>well, why do you think i made that bet? kiss
>she gives me a few more kisses, then we make out for a bit and she goes because she meets a friend of her
>we talk and decide to see eachother more often


>couple days later, she comes over with a few friends, my best friends is also here
>we order pizza, chill a bit, drink a few beers
>sadly i couldn't talk with her much as she was mostly on the farest corner of the couch or her friends interrupted us, etc
>text her later that it's too bad we didn't talk more
>"yeah, i hate my friends for interrupting us the whole time :/"

>few days later, ask her if she wants to go to the cinema this week
>"oh yes! when? :)"
>im pretty much free all the week since 1pm
>"i don't know if ill have time, i already made plans with some friends. i don't like the cinema anyway"
>umm, ok?

>>732225426
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OoW08MConp4

>>732220650
My nigga

>>732225426
>>732226406

>the next few times i wanted to meet with her she says she doesn't have time
>fast forward, actually managed to make plans
>cancells on me, because she promised her friends she'd go drink with them a while ago
>looking on snapchat later
>4:30, got a snapchat with her in a bed with some dude cuddled up against her
>5:20, "i can't sleep"
>7:00 just a picture of this dudes back

her story had also a few snaps were she laughs while filming her female friend saying
>i wanna have sex with anon(my name)
story disappeared after a few hours

back to feeling empty i guess :(
>WHY THE FUCK DO I GET CONNECTION ERROR ALL THE TIME

>>732226121
>>732226473
read the rest though
>>732226406
>>732226588

>>732226588
You know the kind of happiness you could have gotten if she hadn't been a twat? It's still out there. Somewhere.

>>732226588
can't deal with dem feels right now, i feel so numb and empty.
i mean, what the fuck? randomly throughout the days i just get the thought "what the fuck" and i see that fucking picture with the dude behind her

came to /b/ because i was bored and wanted to fap, but i ended up writing all this shit out. WHAT THE FUCK

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>>732226961
a-anon... not that guy, but shit. thank you

>>732226961
Maybe, maybe not.But it just fucks me up. I've met a lot of girls, but it usually was meh. 0 feelings, and the conversations even thou great at start became boring, weird, and like kinda forced shortly after.
With her it was different, everything was just right and when we talked we wanted to say the same thing at the same time a lot. Dunno, maybe we were too similar.

It's just fucked up that for the first time i started to feel something and then poof it's gone. I was perfectly fine with taking it slow as that's what she wanted, and i just cannot comprehend why she would go ahead and cancel the plans on me and fuck a dude a few days later. While she was the one that first contacted me and saying that we should see eachother more often?!

You're probably right anon. It's just that this fucked me up a lot and i just cannot understand how someone could go from being a person who makes you happy and gives you hope, to a person that clearly wants to make you suffer.

I hope one day i will find that, but as for now my hope has been shattered.

>>732219230
That smirk. Those socks. I need her boipucci now.

>>732220749
Sums me up pretty well, except that I have kind of childish ambition and a nerve for injustice. Keep hanging in there, and not by a noose.

>>732222143
It's ok to have fucked up feelings and thoughts. People can't literally read minds. I like some loli shit with a female dom, and I think that's fucked up because a kid coming onto you is weird, but I also a relief since I wouldn't be attracted to a kid that wouldn't want it more than I do, if that even makes sense. The real thing is, even if I wanted to molest children, I wouldn't do it, because that's a too big risk for me personally.

I hope you change your mind, anon.

>>732224112
Post pics.

>>732219230
she's absolutely adorable, her father is a faggot, no wonder she broke contact

>>732219328
The only thing that I ask of like is one night with a beautiful girl like this, if I ever get my wish then I'll turn the car on in the garage and quietly go to sleep while listening to Motown

>>732227077
Fuck her man, you got too invested and she's fucking with you. Delete the pic and move on. She's just another fucking snake, so you can do better than that. Don't you fucking get all traumatized by a ho that you let in too close. Don't lose faith, eventually you'll learn to read them bitches.

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>>732230725
MGTOW detected.

>>732219230
Can't find cassette bands in my city