I'm a cop...AMA

Timestamp with badge for proof

Funniest/ scariest calls and what happened?

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What are your thoughts on Keanu Reeves and his immortality?

>>730768753
Most fukd up case you have been on?

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>>730768753
Are you a cop? Legally you have to tell me.

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>>730768753
Am I being detained?

Funniest and scariest call what happened?

>>730768753
What compelled you to sign up for a job that puts you in the position to deal with the lowest of humanity?

Also do you think most people hate you?

>>730768753
What's your badge number, faggot?

>>730768753
What sort of things do you work on?

How long you been fucking pigs? I mean a police officer?

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>>730769142
best

What's your favorite part of the job?
Least favorite?
Do squad cars have GPS for calls?

>>730768753
do you get turned on when you cuff a hottie? i would.

ru the junky aussy cop that was on here earlier?

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>>730768753
Why dont you kill yourself for not supporting #BlackLivesMatter since your a racist nazi?

favorite funny story from the job?

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>>730768939
wont do badge because it has my city name/badge number on it

>>730768753
Some cops, more than should be allowed, get too emotional when dealing with small time perps...petty vengeance has no room in the application of law, just because they gave you a bit of shit, don't add some extra bullshit charges in there. See this on COPS fairly frequently. You're supposed to be better than that.

>>730768984
funniest-a live turkey in a trailer two days before thanksgiving.
scariest-responding to a family member that had been nearly killed in a car accident

>>730769142
yes, yes you are

>>730769166
I honestly wanted to do it ever since I was a kid. I'll spare you the "i wanted to help people" speech and thought it would be fun

>>730769236
anything and everything. I work in a big college town so I deal with facebook harassments all the way up to murder's and sex assaults.

>>730769258
7 years and still aging my bacon

>>730769365
least favorite-domestics, I hate how kids get exposed to violence and have to live in that enviroment
favorite-getting to meet different people from the city/county and talking to them
all of our squads have gps

>>730769406
nope. USA USA

>>730769731
I know what you mean, Cops dickhead attitude makes sense because it helps establish dominance but some of them take things very personally and get off on the power. I worked as an EMT for a few years and saw how a lot of cops had very similar attitudes and presentations to criminals. In a way it makes sense, just contain the assholes and have them fight it out amongst themselves.

>>730769731
I think, like any profession, there are good ones and bad ones. I go into work every day trying to be respectful and courteous to everyone until the time comes to stop being courteous. Not every police officer has this approach but I have found it to be beneficial in calming people down and getting a resolution that doesn't always involve using force.

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>>730770257
ahhthere was a cop from melbourne aust on here before,telling where u could score drugs

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>>730770929
like I said, theres bad cops out there....drugs are bad

1.) When you get a cybercrime / identity theft report... not like harassing/stalking/someone watched someone else type their password in, but like full blown, mortgages taken out in their name, online banking logins compromised....

a.) does your city have a cyber investigative unit?

b.) what do you do if the cybercriminal is outside your jurisdiction?

c.) what do you do if they're in another country?

d.) when someone pays for your food at a restaurant, do you ever assume they're doing it to feign support for cops as a cover for the fact that they're actually deeply involved in organized crime

e.) why do courts still use lie detectors when they aren't accurate and can be fooled without any noticeable movement or other no-no's by clenching your sphincter?

f.) how many perps have you arrested that had one or more pairs of handcuff keys concealed in their clothing, ie in drawstring area of pants or inside shoe?

g.) do you ever feel bad that your work sometimes contributes to a system which traps those most at risk into a lifestyle of crime while simultaneously not being high-level enough to catch the real serious bad guys who are doing the real big crimes?

>>730771026
drugs are only bad because they are illegall..come on you must get sick of wasting time booking kids because they wanna get high

>>730771105
A-no but our detectives section is trained in such crimes
B-jurisdictions usually work together to solve those with the help of state police (depending on state)
C-not really sure about other countries (outside of my realm of work)
D-I almost always refuse someone paying for my food because I don't want to get a bad rap for "taking bribes". I wont lie people have paid for my food before but I try not to let people.
E-we don't use lie detectors in my city. we do use voice stress analysis machines and forensic interviewing though.
F-haven't run into a lot of handcuff keys hidden on people shockingly. We do have one guy in town that always keeps on in his sock though.
G-There's always people that you personally can't arrest for big crimes. I will say I have seen the so called "cycle of poverty" up close and personal and it is tough. While on the one hand people are committing crimes, on the other hand they may be stealing food to feed their 3 kids...it's not any easy jobs

>>730769597
What in the fuck does a timestamped piece of paper prove?
Block out the name and badge number or this is fake and gay and you should fuck off

have you ever bashed anyone?
wats worse in your area?niggas or rednecks?
or beaners?

>>730771674
see >>730771844 to prove you're a cop, but otherwise, fair answers, you seem to be a very level-headed person who understands the ramifications of your actions as someone honor-bound to uphold the law as much as they are to protect their community.

There are no names on badges, Nantes are in name plate like military, dept,and badge number only on badge, They were passed down , lower the number longest on job. Your not an American cop at least, no,such thing as a custom badge with your name on it. Badges are there before you even born , I call bullshit on you.

y u nigger faget doe?

>>730772670
while most department have name plates ours do not. Our department is large enough that we have badges with names and badge numbers on them and we have our names sewn in above the right shirt pocket

>>730772900
Post a timestamp of it faggot

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>>730772900
there's lots of companies out there that make badges. We order them from out of state from a bulk store of some sort (don't know the name because I never had to pay/order them)

>>730768753
Why are you so afraid of black people?

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>>730772076

>>730773197
plot twist...I'm african american

how many niggers have you put down?

>>730768753
what should I do if you pull me over.

>>730774430
stay calm, dont go diving into your dash or center console, keep your hands visible and be respectful as I will be to you

>>730774059
>>730774059
>inb4 NIGGER
Why become a cop?

>>730768753
Why the fuck do you smell so much like bacon?

>>730774646
wasn't sure what i wanted to do until I was in college and met some of the University police dept. I enjoyed their stories and seeing what they did on a shift to shift basis.

>>730774741
we all get bacon scented cologne in the academy

>>730768753
I've been thinking about becoming a cop, how hard is it?

>>730774890
Is it worse or better than expected and how so?

>>730768753
Do you know any dirty cops an are you one? How corrupt is your department?

>>730771638
it's illegal because of the harm it causes your body and the increased likelihood that someone on drugs (other than pot I guess) will act violently towards someone else if their addiction is bad and they need to find more drugs quickly

>>730775166
depends on where you're looking and what type of department. Theres not a lot of competition for cop jobs right now

>>730775208
It's probably worse just because my expectations were so high. It's a tough job (mentally and physically). Early in my career I worked nights and theres nothing worse than working a 10 hour overnight shift, going into court 2 hours after work and then sleeping 4 hours before going in for another 10 hour night shift

How smart is the smartest cop in your department?

>>730775349
See, I'm afraid I'll fuck up majorly or some shit and get fired/arrested for being so shit, lmao.

>>730769597

How come that first 7 has a hook and the second 7 doesn't?

DOES THIS PROVE YOUR A POLICE OFFICER?? WHAT DOES IT MEAN

>>730775639
as long as you don't accidentally shoot someone who isn't a threat or use other kinds of excessive force you'll be fine

If I call you sir are you more likely to drop my speeding ticket below 10?

>>730769411
why don't you kill yourself for being a cuck to minorities?

>>730775622
we have some really intelligent guys. We have guys who have masters and p.h.d's in our department. I have a bachelors and that's plenty for me.

>>730775696
my handwriting is so bad and inconsistent so who knows. Half the time I write in cursive and half the time it's block letters

>>730775921
What do the people with masters and phds do?

>>730775861
if you're respectful and are pleasant then most cops will cut you a break

>>730776053
they are all over the place. Some in patrol, some detectives, some admin staff, some in crime scene investigation, and one guy who does crime stat analysis

>>730776121
Has worked 2/3 times for me so far

If you catch me driving 60-100 mph over the speed limit, but I pull over immediately, stay polite, have no prior infractions, all my papers are in order and I'm white, would I leave with just a warning?

>>730776010
thanks for the response brotha

Yeah as a Native American in Canada I'm basically trash, be whenever I come across the police I make God damn sure I'm respectful and I find that police are always respectful back.

>story
I had a small incident with a neighbour and 2 officers came in my house. 1 talked to my dad and the other watch some of the NHL game with me

cool dudes

>>730776398
Are you fucking retarded?
>white
Of course you will

>>730776398
I'd fucking shoot you cracka

>>730776398
if anyone is going 60-100 mph over that's gonna end up in an arrest.

>>730776398
Not him but f no. If you're speeding that fast you'll obviously get a ticket.

>>730776514
What if it's at night on a completely abandoned straightaway with no one else around for miles...

(begging the question, why would you be watching for people speeding there anyway...)

>>730776521
>>730776514
Dayum, I'll just outrun the cops then. It's risky tho. Thanks.

>>730776457
Yeah we enjoy hanging out with people. If I'm at a persons house for a non-emergency type call and they are watching a game that im interested in I usually chat with them about it. Also I'm a gamer so I always end up talking to people about the games they have out

>>730775568
Fuck an we wonder why cops have short tempers an can become trigger happy

>>730768753
What if you incidentally pull over a 30 year old dude, he's made an honest mistake. He's apologetic and submits all his info, politely. You notice the smell of marijuana, it's probably in the glove box or center console. You ask him is there anything I need to know about in the car? He says, no sir.

What then? Just curious, I actually really like cops.

>>730776743
depending on the state it usually is a misdemeanor if you're going 30 over so 60 over would probably be felony and wreckless driving in most states (it is in mine)

>>730768753
>>730768753
Can you tell me how an investigation into a drug dealer would typically go? not a small time guy but a guy who supply dealers.
QUestions i want specifically answered. How would i know when to check for the magnetic gps tracker and where is it typically put on a car.
Are phones able to be pinged to a houes and how effective is this in getting a warrant?
How easy is phone tapping warrants to obtain and how often are people wire tapped without knowing? How would one be able to tell tehy were tapped?

>>730776931
the odor of cannabis in a vehicle is PC for a vehicle search and most cops aren't going to look over that unless your'e in a state with medical marijuana and have the updated paperwork

Speeding tickets depend so much on the cop. I've been let go with a warning for 115 in a 65, I've also gotten a ticket for 64 in a 55.

If you're driving a sports car and happen to be pulled by a cop who is into cars, it helps

>>730777306
Noice, precautions are your friend then. This is very helpful.

>>730776749
Actually, thinking about that, most states/provinces have a no-chase policy right?
So if I'm rolling 60-100mph over the limit, and I just keep going (up to the next exit or the one after), technically you can't follow me and I'm safe?

>>730776931
Never admit to cops that you smoke weed and never give consent to search your car. I have been pulle doover with weed in the middle console but i said i dont smoke and never have and i guess he wasnt confident enough to call the dog and let me go. I also said no you may not search my car. they usually say "mind if i take a look? or oh, so if i look i wouldnt find anything? Then an idiot would say thers nothing you can look if you want and they will.

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>>730769258

>>730774967
Doesn't mean you have to use it you fucking pig

How many politicians have you caught fucking kids???

>>730769597
The NSA will now catalog your handwriting.

>>730777486
Yeah, been pulled for a 55 in a 30 zone, got a ticket. Two days later, pulled for 55 in a 30 zone again but by a different cop, got a warning. Eh.

>>730777532
pursuit policies are set (typically) by each individual agency. But I will say more agencies pursue than don't pursue.

>>730777565
This is also helpful.

>>730777817
>>730777111
Answer this. Or are you jus ta stupid fucking grunt who doesnt even know how an investigation is done. haha little fuckign kijds know this shit where im from. Pigs truly are the lowest of the low

>>730777306
>the odor of cannabis in a vehicle is PC for a vehicle search

Be honest here - not saying you have, but there HAS to be cops out there who just say that they smell marijuana to get PC even if they really don't. Admit it.

Have you fucked any kids, dan?

>>730778059
it's hard for me to answer that. Typically we have at least 2 officers at every stop so if both dont smell it then we don't take any action

>>730777866
Alright, seems pretty clear, if I get caught speeding I have to flee. It's a 50/50 whether I'm free or if I have to actually outrun the police car, which could be simple with a 160-200 mph headstart. Thanks!

>>730778059
Pretty sure that's the case at least 50% of the time

>>730778059
Tons do. Thats why you never admit because then in court if they dont find weed you can sue them and shit for harrastment and even if they do you they often forget to read your rights so everythign is thrown out in court. Keep your fuckign mouth shut.

>>730769133
He doesn't tho

>>730778247
I guess the answer for this particular problem is move to California, Colorado, or The NW.

>>730769133
An undercover cop doesn't have to tell.
Source ( undercover cop vlog)

>>730778316
well you also have to be 100% certain that we didn't see your license plate. Basically with your license plate you can be found rather easily

>>730778356
Just look at the Manuel vs city of Joliet case. They pretended to find weed and they got brought to court and they lost the case getting fucked out of a lot of money !

>>730778548
One time i did an illegal u turn and this cop was following me but never turned its lights on. I busted a quick right and sped down an alley way. like 100 km an h but he had to stop for a car i cut off. Why havent i been issued a warrant for fleeing because i saw them later and they had their lights on in a team of 3 cars and were talking on the police scanner abotu it. Is it because he didnt turn his lights on when he should have?

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Nice try cops

>>730778548
Couldn't I just say it wasn't me in the vehicle? Or that it was stolen, didn't report it, but just got it back?

How does it feel knowing that normal citizens realize you're part of a legalized gang and wish you would die?

>>730768753
I lost my job and dropped out of college like 8 months ago. Should i join police? Dont want to do military.

>>730778706
statute of limitations for petty offenses (traffic citations) is 2 years. Technically they could mail you a citation for the offense (it won't happen). It's possible the officer didn't care enough to pull you over or didn't get your full license plate. hard to say

>>730778356
>even if they do you they often forget to read your rights so everythign is thrown out in court.

Cops don't actually have to mirandize you when making an arrest and charging you with a crime. The only thing not having your miranda rights read will get you is having anything you admitted to not admissible as evidence - they don't just throw the whole case out.

Are you on the job, RIGHT NOW?

You better not be...
there better not be 1 fucking minute of tax payer dollars going to your fucking around on the internet.

You are NOT doing outreach.
you are talking to a bunch of social retards, one hand on their dicks, in their underwear, looking at rekt and traps and asian porn. NO WAY should 1 penny of taxpayer dollars go to this fucking retarded shit... you are not performing a community service, FUCK NO.

and that goes for facebook, and fuckbook, and whatever else the fuck. NEVER should that be done on taxpayer dime.

but but, I am on lunch break, or cigarette break,. or wiping nigger blood off my boots break...
FUCK NO. You are on Taxpayer Salary, even when on break. You get paid by the day, the week, biweekly, whatever. YOu show up to work in uniform, you are on taxpayer dime.

YOU better not be fucking on fucked up websites like this when on taxpayer time.

BUT, if you are at home, not in uniform., NOT on call, just chilling on time off, well what the fuck are you doing here, this place is for retards and faggots. you got enough gore stories and prosititute stories amnongst your co-workers, shame on fucking you for hanging out with these faggots. fuck you, you are a disgrace.

(I know i am a disgrace, that is my excuse for being here....)

>>730778960
Im in Canada. Yes thye do. One buddy of mine got off with an oune of coke pre bagged and another with un registered rifles and ammo

>>730779029
Why do you care so much about tax payer dollars? It's not yours, you don't even have a job to contribute to it.

>>730779132
>Im in Canada.

Well then fuck off - this thread is about cops in America, snownigger.

>>730778960
cops are actually only required to read you miranda if you are under arrest and are being interrogated for a crime.

>>730778939
He chased me down the alley but its not my first pirsuit i lsot him. Maybe just not enough on tape of ac rime besides speeding so no point bringing it to court?

>>730779180
oh, snap...
faggot

i aint talking to you, I am talking to the degenrate pig using taxpayer dollars to be HERE

>>730776743
>what if it is dark and a can't see shit, that's better then, right?
...

>>730779029
not on the clock and wouldn't have time to do this if I was

>>730776398
Wow how stupid are you? 60 above is not a ticket, that's removal of license and possible jail time!

>>730778548
>>730778728
..so? Without an admission of guilt, I can't be linked to the crime right? It's not because my car is present that I was.

>>730768753
Is it true that male detainees have to stand naked in a line and show that they're not hiding anything in their backsides or under their foreskins?

>>730779410
Why dont police ever look too far into suicides. For example lead investigators in drug cases commiting suicide with their own revolver when its pretty obviosut they didnt. Or if they cant prove otehrwise is it suicide or is it a public relation thing

>>730779029
This dweep post has made me want to become a cop, chill around on Facebook, find this guy's address and just weekly send pictures of me wasting tax pennies on the internet.
(Let's be honest, probably not his tax pennies, as he sounds like a jobless loser, but still....)

>>730779535
Yeah youcan say its stolen i know alot of gang bangers who get off with alot like this. please note they will fingerprint your car later so wipe it off properly or light it on fire of something. or donate it to kidney car foundation they collect ur car for free

>>730779535
well theres a few things that could happen. An officer could write you the citation if he saw you (or someone similar to you driving) and take his chances in court. Or he could impound the car and request that you have the person who was driving come in and talk to him.

>>730779594
Yes. In prison you havE to bend over and cough naked and they look up your asshole. also rape happens alot but more so in jail. If you think ur ever goona go to jail start working out now its real in there. buncha losers.

>>730779535
Depends on state. Here the responsibility is with the owner of the car in the end. If you can't prove someone else was driving, you're in the shit

>>730779653
suicides are usually investigated as homocides if foul play is suspected.

>>730769034
Underrated post.

>>730779410
It ls like the sherrifs.
the first two years, they work in prisons, so they they think EVERY person is a murderer, rapist, theif, child fucker, just waiting to throw a bucket of mixed urine, shit, blood,and snot in their faces. so they treat everyone they come in contact with as a felon..

so cop comes to this fucking degenerate place to see what the public does in their free time, and even worse, he is participating in this here faggotry, so he can tell his co-working nigger stomping jack booted work buddies about his being a member of /b/.

Yes, that is what we need in public servants.

get out of here, interact with real people, and get a real perspective of what non criminals are like, let that influence your understanding of people, dont get feedback from this faggoty place, get your influences and feedback in the real world, all you are doing is polluting your mind and your work attitude with this fucktitude here...

>>730779594
I dont work in a jail but I know the "squat and cough" routine is real

>>730779772
Alright, pretty much what I expected. Thanks!

So if I ever get caught, I have to go fast enough to prevent the officer from seeing the plate/driver, flee the scene, deny everything if found then lawyer up.

>>730780125
or just don't drive excessively fast :)

>>730780288
That's an interesting angle

>>730768753
>>730768753
>>730768753

can you come pull me over but instead i just suck your dick a bunch?

well guy's I'm out. I've got some Witcher 3 to play. Thanks for the unique, and always interesting, questions

>>730779975
This is a test for you. So you turn on your sirens you pull over a car. he doesnt stop he pulls right into a residental slowly and then takes anotehr right with his music blasting. he then pulls over.
When you get up to his driver side window he has water all over his shirt and there is a big water bottle empty on the ground. What happened?

>>730779665
doesnt matter if my tax pennies or not.
you just represent modern policing, and its as bad as we thought, not pride of service, but rather, thinks this place is worthy of a real professional police officer.

he is hanging out in a place of moral decriptitude, and no, its the little faggot who is telling him to get the fuck out of here that is at fault, "he dont pay taxes, he is little dweeb"..yeah you got me there orifice, I am the general public that doesnt deserve high quality public servants, because I personally do not pay 100% of your salary and benefits, and your early disabiility retirement at 80% of ending salary, etc. Yes, I am wrong, and you are the mediocre ppublic servant who gets to shit on us (lemme guess, you are gonna make fun of my unknown ethnicity and my lack of spell check...)