Any of /b/ pizza delivery drivers? Lets share some spooky/weird/crazy/sexy

>>730767921
Bumping for niggardly stories

bamp for crazy greentexts

Bump negro

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Was delivery driver, just got fired for pic related

>>730769413
you wanna give us some actual context for that weird ass shit?

>>730769487
fake baby + breadstick shake-on + butter = babysticks*(Fired)

>>730769692
missed out on opportunity for free blowjob and an even better tip. dumb

me and my buddies have access to vast amounts of LSD in the mid----late 80's Texas
>tripping on golden key blotter
>has key on face but if you stack 3 hits it makes a key on the side
> so 3 tabs is the way to go for an intense trip
>30 minutes in we're hungry ?? order dominoes
>delivery guy shows up and we knew him, not well but he's cool
two bro hiding outside steal his car and he ends up tripping with us
>I eat so much pizza with all that acid and start throwing up I think I'm kill for about 3 hour
>next morning is beautiful sunrise on the roof and pizza guy is one of my bff's forever

>>730769926
bullshit

>>730770075
kys

>>730767921
Worst job I ever had. Nobody should ever take a pizza delivery job.

Only notable story was some disgusting old ham beast cigarette bin who grabbed my dick because she couldn't pay for the pizza and thought she could compensate in other ways. Literally gagged in her face as it happened and she didn't even get offended or take the hint.

Another time some low life followed me back to the pizza place, grabbed my car door as I opened it, and blocked me while he screamed at me for his pizza not being as good as he wanted or some shit. All the while stopping occasionally to say he knew it wasn't my fault being just the driver, but then still berating me while I stood there knowing I could say or do nothing or lose the job.

>>730770445
i had some guy follow me back to the store and park perpendicular behind me to i guess block me in. i got out and said, "what the fuck do you want?" and he started trying to go off on me but i couldnt understand him and told him to fuck off and walked inside. don't let people treat you like shit in fear of losing ur minimum wage job lol

Not really "pizza" but my wife used to have fun with the Chinese food delivery kid.

Started normal enough until one day she answered in her swimsuit due to a swim with the kids. He got a little twisted up and wouldn't make eye contact. Wife let me know when she back in.

Next couple times we ramped it up.
- see through shirts
- smaller bikini that was from our Cancun trip (wicked weasel)

The last time before we moved we went all out for the little guy.
> set up a camera facing the doorway
> put in the order for our usual
> wife puts on her corset and pearl panties
> kid rings, wife answers
> he apologizes frantically trying to hand her the food
> "it's okay, you just caught me before I changed"
> wife walks back to the desk and digs through her purse
> being very sure to give a show
> "would you accept any other kind of payment?"
> wife holds out the money while rubbing one of her tits
> kid bolts.

Haven't found any new delivery boys in the new place that are worthy yet.

>>730770659
Meh, I knew the boss and he was a good guy. Meant the job was very flexible which I needed in college so I kinda just didn't feel like making a scene. But I absolutely agree with you man.

>>730770784
Let's see the video

>>730771179
Nope, dead give away on the wife. It was only like 30sec, never see much and can't see the only fun thing. The kids reaction.

>>730767921
>Work at pizza place
>Okay pay, tips are good
>At a college near me w/ lots of asians bcuz CA
>Not like asian descent, like straight up herro dere asians
>One such group comes in, orders wings
>"Hot or BBq?"
>"Whats the difference?"
>Nigga you did not just ask that
>I thought asians were smart
>"Uh well one has hot sauce, the other has BBQ sauce"
>"Niggas act like I just crack the DaVinci code
>The do that asian "OOOOHHhh"
>"We takea the BBQ$
>Not even the dumbest cunts I had to deal with, got so much more

>>730769818
>>730769692
missed out on opportunity get asshole reamed out for free and an even better tip. dumb

>>730771414
In other words made up story

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>be me
>pizza delivery
>deliver to fucking mansion
>lady asleep on couch
>knock knock
>knock knock knock knock
>BANG BANG BANG
>lady gets up
>stumbles to door
>open door only to stumble again
>rips handle off door
>rips door off hinges
>bashes head on table
>tries to grab me for balance
>lv 9001 booze smell
>lv 9999 shit smell
>now notice
>shes smeared with shit
>room smeared with shit
>couch smeared with shit
>walls
>floor
>all over tv
>now all over me
>be polite
>she signs credit card slip
>now shit is on the slip
>signature is written upside down
>no tip
>go back to restaurant
>give them shit slip and go to wash
Off
>the american dream

>>730772580
niggerwut

>>730769776

Thanks anon

>>730769922
This is bs, there's no way he's been dead for 4 days max and the funeral has already happened, that shit takes time to plan

>>730773115
well depends. if the guy had no family, then the state would've probably quickly had a service and done away with the other normal funeral procedures.

Deliver pizza to some shitty duplex
chick answers door in loose robe, showing tits. Start stuttering, she invites me in to put pizza on table and get paid
there are 5 dudes there, table has huge pile of buds, its some kind of weed manicure party.
I am totally eyeballing hoping I can get a "tip"
Get shitty one dollar tip
Call cops

deliver to drunk guy at his house. he took the pizza and walked in the house with loud music playing. he couldnt hear me banging the door for the money

also one time a gay guy old as fuck ask me my age and to stay for a bit and he tip me, grab my hand, wink at me, it was only 5$. idk what he expected.

bitch tip me 1Cent imma kill her some day

>>730773393
you did the right thing anon. it was sex or the cops. she dug her own grave.

>>730773328
Yeah, I guess your right, nvm

>>730769587
>Babysticks
You're doing gods work

I had a pizza delivery guy break down out front of my apartment. He came back and rang the doorbell after about 10 minutes of trying to start his car, and asked if he could use my phone to call the store and tell them what happened. It was really cold so I invited him in and we ended up talking and eating pizza for two hours while we waited for the store to call a tow truck. He had just immigrated from Bangladesh and was having a very hard time away from his family - who were still waiting on visa's to come over. Long story short, I ended up becoming friends with him, helping him with his visa issues, helping him find a better apartment, and meeting his wife and children when they eventually arrived from Bangladesh. I still talk to him.

>>730769587
nice pun 10/10

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>>730767921
that looks like the first frame of a porn vid.

someone needs to add the Brazzers logo to that shit.

>>730773953
Your a cool dude anon good show sir

>>730773115
Bruh, funerals happen quick, especially in certain ethnicities.
My wife is Calabrese, her nonna was buried less than 48 hours after dying.
I know with Muslims it can be the same day.

Wheres the spooky pasta

>>730769776
I just about shat myself reading that last part

>>730774647
>inter race speculation becomes apparent
How can any white man trust what you have to say

>>730775229
Because I'm white, my wife is Italian and we have white children with blue eyes.

>>730767921
>be me
>be beta
>work for Dominoes
>phone rings
>guy orders $30 worth of pizza to be sent to hotel room
>drive to hotel
>knock on the hotel room door
>guy takes the pizza out of my hand
>looks at the recipe
>tells me I said $20 on the phone
>shuts the door with the food
>call my manager
>he says to come back to the store because it's Christmas and fuck it
>walking to my car
>pass a Pizza Hut worker in the parking lot
>almost warn him but too beta

>>730773111
Witnessed

>be me
>male porn actor
>agent calls me
>"Anon, got this job with blahblah blah productions......."
>Job shit
>Take the jerb

>Couple weeks later
>At the shoot
>New director I've never met
>Pretty cool guy
>Having lunch with the other actor, crew
>Talking about the plot (it's porn and we suck at acting)
>Literally just a fuck film for me
>Need $$$ for coke
>Running through script
>It's cheesy as fuck but whatever

cont? It's pizza delivery boy related

>have a full time job but take extra part time job on Thur, Fri, Sat delivering pizza for Little Caesars, even had their own car
(yes, they actually had delivery in the 90's)
>get stack of orders, making good time, tips are average but don't care because making $6 an hour driving around
>last order, go to door, average looking older lady
>tells me her money is the dining room so go in house and wait
>pretty nice digs, 10/10 probably would rob
>see woman bend over, night gown doesn't cover her pussy or ass
>brings money over, asks if I like what I saw, say I have no idea what she's talking about
>points at crotch, realize I'm not wearing jeans but khakis and boner is showing
>tells me its cool if I'm down to fuck
>end up railing her, get back and boss is bitching about taking so long, explain last house took forever coughing up the money
>every Friday for two more weeks, got the same order to the same house and ended up fucking
>get order one Friday, bigger than usual, pay no attention
>get to house, dude opens door
wut
>tell him amount, woman doesn't say anything but says she's got the money, guy shrugs and walks off
>tells me her husband works on riverboat three weeks at a time and she gets lonely
i'mokaywiththis.jpg
>wait till he goes back out, start railing her again

I ended up getting shitcanned when they stopped delivery. Never talked to her again.

>>730776299
Why not

>>730771414
Bullshit

>>730776299
Basically went like this. A fucking train kept going by so it took a while to put everything together
>Drive directors car into driveway of shoot house
Train goes by right when we start shooting
>Take pizza box prop go up and knock on the door
>Bang on door, other actor answers
>Have brief conversation about her sister ordering pizza and leaving
>Complain that I've been all over the city trying to find the place, wasted tons of gas
>Invite myself in
Next shot
>We're in the living room and she's calling her sister
>Turns out her sister ordered the pizza
TRAIN
What a fucking plot this is riveting
>Sister wont come home and pay for the pizza
>Other actor implies with body language that she'll fuck for a payment
>Set pizza down
>"Other ways of doing it"

This is where the magic happens. We shot this pretty much straight through. We didn't want to get hindered by that train going by so we got a lot of this done in a short amount of time despite the train.

>Making out and undressing
>Some actors will NOT do kissing
>Foreplay
>Blowjob
>Sex stuff
>Ended up pulling out and cumming on her face for the cumshot
>Got paid $600

>>730773115
Also if he was old they may have had advance notice, begin planning before he actually died

I have a friend with insomnia who worked graveyard shift delivery for a little while.
The pizza shop was busted a while previously for dealing weed under their pizzas and was lucky not to be shut down.
My friend accepted the job paying under minimum wage, and when he started they payed him less than half of what they promised. They were abusive too, and he got pulled over in their car once for a breath test and it was unregistered. He quit not long after that