my mom found out I have a dildo in my room now she thinks I'm

>>730233785
Tell her you like pegging.

Slap her with your dildo screaming Dildo is life fucking infidel!

>>730233785
go fuck a guy in the ass in front of her and ask her if thats really what she wanted

>>730233785

tell her it belongs to your GF

are you a retard? how is that hard to come up with?

>>730233785
Fuck her to prove that you aren't.

>>730233785
Introduce here to your boyfriend.

>>730234076
>browsing 4chan
>have gf
>kek

>>730233785
:thinks:

>>730233785
Am i the only one who desperately wants to take a bite out of that? The lower part looks very moist and tender

>>730233917
Kek

>>730233785
Fuck her and prove her wrong.

>>730234167
Favorite reply

You have two options.
Admit your gay or Bend her over.

This happened to me. I fucked my sister now they know I'm just a pervert!

>>730234460
Oh same

>>730234460
seriously anon?

>>730234277
I'm not even know what is that.

>>730234625
>I'm

>>730234625
It is a horses foot with the hoof removed.
The horse was already dead and it was done for educational purposes.

>>730234625
Its your dog.

>>730233785
time to kys faggot

>>730233785
Get a boyfriend.

>>730234768

are you sure it wasn't taken off to make glue?

>>730234167
[/thread]

>>730233785
What kind of person is your mom? Does it actually bother her?
Also are you actually gay or do you just like a bit of prostate stimulation?
If your mom is cool just tell her the truth; If shes not get out of there as soon as you can

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>>730233785

>>730234213
>>not knowing what a lie is

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>>730233785

>be me
>be gay
>religious family living in American south
>extremely anti gay
>hear dad say faggots all the time, makes gay jokes and shit
>hit puberty, starting to like guys
>effeminate voice
>musthidethisforever.jpg
>Family suspects
>Actually have a female friend pretend to be gf to throw them off
>watching pronz. late at night, parents asleep
>cum buckets. go to wash hands. don't close browser but close door
>Come back from bathroom, door is open but room is empty
>ooooooooooh fuck.
>hide in my room for a week, little to no contact with family, everything feels awkward
>decide that needs to end
>Go to store with my dad. riding along listening to the radio and shit
>Radio turns off.
>Oh fuck.png
>"we need to talk"
>tells me what he saw, say I don't know what he's talking about
>"how do you think I feel knowing my money is going towards feeding and housing some little faggot" etc...
>know he doesnt know much about the internet. admit I was watching porn and it must have autoplayed to next video
>end of conversation, obvious he doesnt believe it
>family treats me different, doesnt talk to me, very distant
>a guy I had known for years admits he's gay, we were best friends, basically brothers, the guys perfect (still with him today) so we decide to go out
>His family is well off. Decided to pay for an apartment for him while he goes to college. Invited me to move in with him.
>aw yis. but first...
>Make a sex tape
>invite him to thanksgiving dinner at my place. never say who he is but they fucking know.
>not an eventful evening. leave sex tape with dad before leaving. only tell him I'm leaving and it'll explain everything
>video ends with me looking at camers with mouth full of cum saying "bye dad"
>haven't talked to my family since. This happened when I was 18. I'm 27 now.
>feelsgood.jpg
>image related. my dads face when I left

>>730235459
This is a win

>>730233785
>my mom found out I have a dildo in my room
>now she thinks I'm gay
>what do I do?


Thing is... if you are a guy and use a dildo.... you are gay.


Faggot!

>>730234213
wtf is a girlfieriend. god damn weebs

>>730235459
fake and gay

>>730235459
Epic

>>730235897
i second this emotion

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>>730235459

>>730235727

>this happened

>>730236196
everyone loses whenever a faggot gets to take a breath

>>730234532
Yes, it was satisfying. The pregnancy risk in retrospect made this move retard.

>>730233785
come out of the closet, faggot.

>>730236325
<3

>>730234460
i believe the appropriate phrase is "well, that escalated out of nowhere"

also pics, insta, twitter and fb of all parties involved please

>>730233785
tell her you borrowed it from your dad

>>730233785
use your fucking brain - tell her you got it for female guests. ooorrr, it was a secret santa or, you're happy exploring your body and you're actually just fucking human - pick any of the above.

>>730236574
I am not going to dox my family on 4chan. lmao.

Even if my family is fucked they are my family.

>>730236983
lets agree on some pics of ur sisteer

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>>730237294
only one i'll share.

>>730233785
She's right.

>>730238074
ur alright, anon

>>730238074
I see why you fucked her now

>>730233785
If a girl had a fleshlight then I'd call her gay

>>730238732
Thanks

>>730238877
I think more of us should fuck our sisters. Shit is amazing.

>>730233785
Why would a straight man had a dildo?

>>730239113
Shit you right

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>>730233785
set it up where your mom walks in on you jackin' it (that'll show her for thinking that you're gay!)

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>>730234277

>>730239283
Straight guys don't have prostates? Who knew!

>>730239283

A lot of gay guys don't like prostate stimulation.

A lot of straight guys do like prostate stimulation.

Being gay literally only means you like people of the same sex.

Murder her, or just play some really fucking loud porn in your room and hopefully she notices.

>>730239650
being gay means ur a faggot

>>730234181
/thread

>>730235119
Kek

>>730234277
>>730235000
>>730238877
>>730239099

Check em

>>730239883

I forget this site is nothing but retards or children. Try developing a personality, maybe you'll be happier?

Like I know you're trolling but... I'm just saying, you probably watch family guy and love every minute of it.

>>730240535
without providing too much back story, i was once an overly liberal, college student at nyu. then i went to law school and discovered something as a i later began to practice: I fucking hate things that are different. my days of defending the "disenfranchised" are over. and no, unlike 99% of the cucks on /b/ i dont hide my feelings when im around other ppl. i may choose to word them differently in public (usually dont but im not gonna pretend to be an edgelord faggot). i hate these degenerates more and more. so fuck you im just being honest with myself and guess what hasnt hurt me one fucking bit, witht he added bonus i dont have to pretend to like ppl

>>730233785
admit it

>>730240535
so fuck you, fuck the gays, and the blacks. all of you are lesser beings. i saw this as a former jew, hitler's mistake was not killing you're faggot loving ass

>>730233785
wtf is that image

>>730233785
Admit ur gay

>>730241088
horse hoof degloved... or glue to be

>>730241073
Cut out the self hate. Especially on this day!

https://youtu.be/kEfphLKEJ-M

>>730241073

>you're

Yeah it's too bad Hitler didnt kill all the gays huh, we don't want them reproducing do we?

>>730240965

Having opinions is fine, I'd never want to take that from someone... but how you present them speaks a lot of your character, even when doing so anonymously online.

And the way you chose to represent yourself reminds me of that one guy who sits in the back of the class making jokes nobody laughs at while not paying attention then getting mad when he gets a paper back that's a bad grade... the type of person who thinks saying "what" over and over during a debate or discussion is a good argument, the person who hates everybody including himself, who makes no effort to be a decent person but still wonders why he has no friends.

I'm not saying these things are true of yourself.. but if Einstein walked into a room flaying about going "hurr hurr hurr!" I'd think he was retarded. I'm sure you would too?

>>730234625
>I'm

>>730233785
kys

>>730241561
cut the hate? ill do it if you livestream yourself tearing at your flesh with a dull knife. no not gonna happen?

>>730241810
since i usually hate it when ppl mistake your and you're, ill give oyu that one. touche

as far as the retard comment, im sorry but not sorry. i am who the fuck i am. i tried the libtard way for the majority of my life only to realize that theres a reason we on the other side are disgusted by what happens when ppl feel its ok to be and do whatever they want. and ur analogy is garbage

>>730241981
Yes cut the self hate. Its a day when we remember the victims and survivors of the worst genocide in human history.

>>730241810
Implying gays dont sleep with straight women to quite suspicions. Gays are just choosing to be gay or there's a gene that gets passed down. Pick one.

>>730242352
like i said, im a former jew. i had family die in the holocaust. fuck em and fuck you too zionist cuck.

>>730242532
Well I wish you luck you do realize when they come for us again they'll go for you as well.

Shame on you. You will come to see the error of your ways and words.

>>730242232

Fair enough I'm better at anal than analogy.

I'm not a libtard just because I'm gay. I hate feminism and SJW's, I think the idea of being trans is fucking retarded, and despite being gay I hate gay stereotypes and the people who live them. Talking with a lisp while wearing rainbow colored flags and prancing up the street, that'll make people accept us right?

Truth is majority of gay people are normal guys, not the stereotypical bullshit. But people associate the stereotypes with gays so when you see a normal guy acting normal but who happens to be gay, you don't associate him as being gay.

>>730242407

There are tons of materials written on what makes people homosexual, if you're going to hate something at least know about it please. I'll give you a hint, social conditioning and the "gay gene" are confirmed myths.

>>730242407
Choice or genetics aren't the only options dumbass.

>>730242711
good. i hope i learn my fucking lesson

>>730242757
know? i know enough. doctorate in law, major in philosophy and double minor in history and psych. what can i tell you with all this knowledge? ur a wannabe self loathing faggot and its a mistake we accept you. fuck you and stop trying to make out like ur better bc "omg traps are stupid and feminazis and sjws take things way too far". u are literally just as awful as any shitty group you can think of

>>730233785
same thing happened to me recently
>jerking off with toy up my ass
>mom catches me
>we talk about it
>I put toy in her ass and fuck her pussy until I cum inside her
>I took a nap
>She made me a PB&J sandwich when I woke up. crusts cut off.

>>730242943

If you have a doctorate (I don't think you've been on 4chan long enough to know nobody believes you, by the way) it must of come from the University of Alabama where the entree requirements are a pulse, a gun permit, and video evidence you've fucked a chicken with your diddy once.

>>730243174
go on, ask me a legal question for ciminal law, civil lit or med mal (california bsed)

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>>730233785
>dildo in my room

"still not gay"

>OP is faggot

>>730233785
>now she thinks I'm gay
knows*
ftfy

>>730233785
But you are gay

>>730243311

I'll think one up while you open up google, deal?

So, with your minor in psychology... what can you tell me about someone who hates a person based on the group they associate with.

I'll make this easy for you. There is a name for people who do this, it's a psychological disorder. You can probably find it on google.

>>730243571
ill accept what i am, especially bc i would never trade it for being a faggot.

>>730233892
underrated

>>730235459
Die fag

>>730243798
i think its self evident, right? gay or straight (but definitely gay), hes got a dildo so he must enjoy being pegged

>>730243782

Yes and as I've said that's perfectly fine provided you don't let your opinions affect how others live their life.

>>730243869

Here's your (you)

>>730233785
Have her walk in on you using it on a girl, then turn look at her and say "how gay am i now?!" Then start chugging a beer while viciously craming the dildo in the girl. That'll show her

>>730233785
OP is always a faggot
/thread

>>730235459
copypasta

>>730233785
feel relief that now you don't have to figure out when to tell her.