Adventure Thread; You are a young blacksmith who has scraped

what are the three buildings, just houses or something more interesting? also, are there any villagers in visual range?

>>730086450
A freebie for the bump.
The 3 buildings seem to just be houses, or houses running small business as well.

You also notice the faint smell of dirt and dew, looking around you spy farmers in the hills and people passing between the homes, young and old.

>>730086676
>7 still decides

it looks like i'll be walking quite a ways to get to anything interesting.

time to barter for a horse and see if any of the locals have rumors that may lead to adventure.

I approach the nearest building and see if anybody is on the premesis to ask them about local news and if they have a horse they'd be willing to trade.

>>730086865
Roll.

>>730086865
rollin

>>730086865
rollerino

go into the nearest house and start looking through the food stores. eat whatever you find. this travelling is going to be hungry work.

>>730086865
roll

>>730087296
reroll

>>730086865
rolling.

>>730086196
Ravage town. Sodomize corpses.

>>730087461
Roll

>>730087296
rerolling, eat that niggers food

>>730087461
Reroll

>>730086865
rolling for friendly trade and gathering information.

>>730087296
last roll

Ask a local for directions

>>730087461
Rroll

ask the townsfolk if there's any work going

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>>730087587
oh boy here we go.

>>730086865
rr

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>>730087587
YAY!

>>730087587
Winrar

>>730087587
checked, time to rape

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>>730087587
God damnit /b/

why can't we ever just go on a normal adventure and do normal things

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>>730087697
Cuz fuck you im great thats why

>>730087587
>>730087461
You figure you're overdo for a sense of control. Strolling into town you scope out the crowd of villagers and approach a small group of kids.
"This will be a nice start." you think.
>You grab two children by the hair and smash skulls together and some stomps when they go down
>The older townsfolk crowd around and you go wild
You stab and bash your way through a herd of elderly and children alike
After the dust settles you take their limp brown cherries as a reward

CHA + 1

You also find 11 gp in your rage

>1 decides

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Rape the next town of goods and virginity

>>730088107
Rape

>>730088130
Rerape

>>730087587
>>730087697
>>730087807
Three autistic faggots roll 7 but neglect to state what they decide to do. /B/rilliant.

>>730088040
Do some cloudwatching

>>730088158
Fuck it
>>730088165
How new are you?

Craft armor from children's bones. Must have butt plug attachment device for armor.

>>730088190
Roll

>>730088165
Cause someone already rolled a 7, PAY ATTENTION >>730087587

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>>730088165
to be fair, the winner was rolled before their posts, and it takes me a min to type stuff out

fetch the nearest horse. fill sack full with provisions for the trail. but before riding out of town, it's time to spend the night here roasting the tender meat of the children to have a good meal.

>>730088231
Fuck. Yes.

>>730088165
pay attention.

>>730088165
Faggot

>>730088236
And failed to state an action, PAY ATTENTION
Oh fuck it, this game is so fucked. I'm out. Andy Sixx's turd threads are better than this group.

Come on op

>>730088231
You aren't satisfied, you NEED a memento of this triumph. Hoisting multiple children over your shoulder, you set to work on some new dreads.

After about an hour at your makeshift workstation, it is complete.

You forge two bracers and a pelvic guard from their bones, using some vertabrae as a makeshift buttplug add on.

At this point you hear approaching horses and voices, it must be the farmers..

>3 decides

Bag; 41 gp
Basic Sword & Shield
2x Bracers of child bone
Pelvic Guard of Child Pelvis

>>730088487
have fun not adventuring, retard.

>>730088040
raid every house for food, gold, scrolls and potions

Take a huge shit in the middle of the village

>>730088294
Thanks for the support!
If I win again I'd say make a new +10 weapon by combining sharp sticks and the victims penises to create a dick mace
>>730088673
Thanks for picking 1 OP

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>>730088487
This autism is cataclysmic

>>730088673
draw steel and cautiously peer out a window or doorway to see if it is indeed the farmers.

if it's just peasantry, then it's time to overpower them and take at least one alive as a captive to press into slavery.

>>730088703
Safe bet!
I'd also like to support with an intimidation roll?

>>730088703
winrar

>>730088703
This adventure is going pretty well so far

>>730088673
well then
>>730088703
You aren't phased the slightest, in fact, you're tuckered out and need to make stool. Leaving your work bench, you head to the center of the village and drop deuce.

Just as the first chud hits the ground, you look up and are met with 5 farmers scared and angry gazes.

>8 decides

>>730088870
OP here, turd dumping is going to be the signature territory mark from our almighty blacksmith swordsmaster that listens to Rhapsody of Fire

>>730088967
Eat a dead man's penis to intimidate

>>730088967
draw steel and attack the farmers, if possible keeping one alive to take for a slave.

>>730089042
Reroll, but without removing the penis from the body

>>730088967
Death stare at them, have head do a 360 spin with white wide open eyes

>>730089078
Rape him first?

>>730089155
we can rape him every time we set camp. we SHOULD however forge a set of proper manacles the first chance we get.

>>730089200
I agree, nice dubs check em.
I also still feel we need a dick mace. Noone wants to get hit by that, which would keep us safe

>>730089078
"Phew" you sigh, as your turd hole closes and brazenly draw your blade, rushing the first line of farmers you kill 2, and 1 is mortally wounded.

You raise your sights to the other 2.
Noticing that there is only one, shivering, old farmer. The other must have ran.

You point your sword at the trembling, nearly sniveling farmer.

"You are MY bitch! Aye?"

The farmer nods and lets out a cry as he finally sees his loved ones dead everywhere, some transformed into armor,

>0 decides

our hero's theme song
https://youtu.be/Xy-o47TLPxw

>>730089339
Roll for >>730089200
>>730089309

>>730089339
Bend him over and put excalibur(peñor) in his master sword hole

>>730089396
I'll allow casual and regulatory raping of our hostage.

>0 still decides.

>>730089438
Reroll for
>>730089436

>>730089339
take a horse and start a travelling circus, with the farmer getting fucked by the horse as your first act

>>730089438
Thanks!

>>730089396 this still, a collaboration of sorts

>>730089475
Reroll

>>730089436
Reroll

>>730089493
Followed by
>>730089475

>>730089533
>>730089499
Fucking hell, i get dubs when I don't want them and can't be assed to fucking roll a 0

make a dick mace out of a solid piece of wood and the penises of our victims.

bind the old man and lead him on a long rope leash. make him carry our supplies as we make way for greatness along the road.

>>730089436
Again

>>730089492
roll

>>730089436
0 fucking
>get

>>730089559
Some get 0 for progression pls

cut the old man's tongue out so that he cannot tell others of our heinous deeds this day, cauterize the wound with an ember from a fire.

bind him and leash him with rope, making him carry our supplies. as we head out along the road.

>>730089640
1 guy 1 horse style pls

>>730089640
My hero, nice twist em knight shamalamadingdong

>>730089757
Yoo, it's old times, the sword being used to kill the villagers is filthy of blood and dirt

So obviously cutting a tongue of a dude is going to kill without any aids of anesthesia, drugs, etc...

>>730089901
And also something to disinfect

>>730089640
You pull your pants up and usher your new man slave away, only asking where some food is. After gathering 3 days worth of food, you become very calm and collected with your new farmer friend.

"What's the name gent?" you ask (dubs decides his NEW name)

He replies, "Skrog, sir." and mumbles.

"Well dipshit," you reply, "we're gonna get famous and I have an act in mind...."

You smile crookedly/manic and usher man slave to a horse carriage.

As you set off down the road you let out a yell, "ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS, HERE I COME!"

>5 decides

Bag; 41 gp
Basic Sword & Shield
2x Bracers of child bone
Pelvic Guard of Child Pelvis
3 days of rations

>>730090007
Please find lube, can't have the horse pink sock him or he is useless to us

>>730090007
The Spanish Inquisition happens

>>730090099
I did not expect that

>>730090007
Lets call him principal poopsmoker

If get then put excalibur(peñor) in the ol' man's master sword socket

>>730090099
Reroll

>>730090099
Wanna name him the Spanish Inq?
I'll give ya a redo.

>>730090155
I suppose

>>730090007
Proceed to Mexico to put on our horse show

maybe we should name the circus "Spanish Inquisition" and name the slave "Harold the Heretic"

>>730090007
Decide to perform ass 2 mouth with old man

>>730090246
I support this, also it's time for a show

>>730090246
Nah, bame the circus Spanish Inquisition but name it:
>>730090144

>>730090007
Go back to old town with traveling circus

>>730090322
Dubs confirm

>>730090283
Re

>>730090366
Reroll

Go to the next village then get naked starting to do the rain dance

>>730090401
Give us 5 kek

>>730090458
Reroll

>>730090007
Roll up to a giants village

Fuck the horse in the ass

>>730090516
Reroll

>>730090502
Do this but then kill yourself from shame after for thinking something so gay was a good progression for your legend to take

>>730090563
Reroll

>>730090007
Kill slave

Summon the lochness monster for divination purposes

Find a dildo bat

>>730090637
Reroll

>>730090099
>>730090144
>>730090155
Compiling in order.

As you make your way down these rugged farm roads, you turn to your slave with a smile and say, "Your new name is Magistrate Poopsmoker, no tiffs about it, and we are forming a troupe of traveling acts. A circus is ya will.... The Spanish Inquisition we'll be!"

Poopsmoker looks at you in awe,
"...but m'sir, you killed me wife n kids, hows a man to trust a murderer?"

He should not have spoken up...

You wallop his cranium off the carriage, tackling him to the ground and force your blade up his shitter.

"HOWS THAT EH?"

Poopsmoker cries and bleeds.

You say down to him, "The regular act is gonna be whichever horse is a gent. So. Be ready and all, thats your life now.


You see a large stone city coming towards your horizon, about a night away.

>3 decides

>>730090563
But then our story ends in sudoku, which is an even gayer option, gayboi

>>730090604
roll

>>730090671
Near the city find a dildo bat

>>730090671
Follow the NAP after you kill the slave

>>730090671
Summon the lochness monster for divination purposes

Then pray Allah to kill all the infidels

>>730090784
yes, roll

>>730090700
I'd rather commit suduko. Let's commit suduko. But creating a giant version. As In destroying the castle in a siege to use the blocks to make the columns and rows

Sell the slave to some Niggers to be used as a sex slave

>>730090867
Re... roll...

>>730090839
Committing suduko, I'm committed to a reroll

>>730090839
>not knowing the sudoku-seppuku references
>being this new
Stay gay, gayboi

They find shemales on the way to the city

>>730091012
Reroll

Summon the goddamn lochness monster for divination purposes

Then pray allah to kill all infidels

>>730090671
we need to barter for a pavillion tent in the city, otherwise fewer people will pay for the show and just watch from a distance.

we need to hire a few criers to spread the word about our show in town, we find street urchins and beggars and offer them a few silvers each to shout "COME SEE THE SPANISH INQUISITION, GREATEST CIRCUS IN ALL THE LAND, SEE MAGISTRATE POOPSMOKER TAKE THE LOVING EMBRACE OF POPE MAGNIFICENT (thats the horse's name now)! 3-SILVERS ENTRY FEE, AND FOR ANOTHER 3 SILVERS PER PERSON YOU CAN MAKE REQUESTS"

IN THE PAVILLION TENT OUTSIDE THE CITY WALLS TONIGHT, COME ONE COME ALL!

>>730091053
Reroll

>>730090938
You see how I said I'd rather commit suduko than do your faggot dance? Then I stuck to my guns and am rolling to make actual suduko. I get the reference, I'm just not letting your cock gobbling stop the progression

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>>730091053
Why?

Nobody shows up making him angry

>>730091140
You should maybe start learning how to spell correctly before, gayboi

>>730091197
Because our hero is going to fucking get indications to become overpowered you stupid fucktard

>>730091053
Well you get lost, somehow.

Figuring you can navigate the roads without help you stumble onto a forked branch. It stops the carriage, you hop out and try to move the stick. As you touch it, you hear sudden thunder and storm clouds roll into sight. You feel a burning sensation on your wrist.
Tree Fiddy it reads.
Seemingly branded by the gods, you embrace the stick and as you do, lighting showers the sky, striking Allah knows where. But some how you know the world has less infidels now.

Poopsmoker is asleep, and sore.
Your horses are tired. Maybe sleep the rest of the night?

>9 decides
>dubs gets random event

Bag; 41 gp
Basic Sword & Shield
2x Bracers of child bone
Pelvic Guard of Child Pelvis
3 days rations
Lochness Divination Rod

>>730091336
are you trying to say the divination is to learn how to become overpowered?

>>730091436
Yeah, you summon the lochness monster, the almighty seer of the sea

It'll ask for about 3.50 gps for the divination and then give you indications of talismans, amulets and spellbound rings to get you overpowered

This isn't rocket science ffs

>>730091257
Oh no, my feelings are hurt. I am so offended by you. :,( you are so good at trolling and insults!

Also, rolling to navigate back and challenge castle's master to a duel to assume lordship

>>730091432
break the divination rod in two and use it to start a fire. sleep the rest of the night and continue down the road in seek of adventure in the morning.

>>730091576
Reroll, using lordship to create giant suduko puzzle

>>730091432
Scantily clad shemales run out of the forest to attack

>>730091432
No, press on.
We don't want to be attacked by the dirty Jewpires after sundown.

To catch up
>>730086196
>>730086676
>>730088040
>>730088673
>>730088967
>>730089339
>>730090007
>>730090671
>>730091432

rolling for this, but rather than continue down the road, backtrack and make way back to the walled city to challenge the master to a duel to assume lordship.

>>730091666
Lord satan

Put divination rod in pooper, shit lightning on filthy peasants and enemies

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>>730091666
>>730091666
holy shit, random event time

>>730091743
fuck, rolling for this

>>730091666
Random Event?
Or shall I make one up?

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>>730091748
Thanks! Can't spell apparently but I can imbue our hero with Satan powers.

Suck it Raindance faggot

Wake everyone up using new ability and get back on the road

>>730091785
I trust you OP <3 666

>>730091432
Wander around to see if there is any edible plants and find some shrooms

You think they're the nutritious ones but in fact they're liberty caps and you start tripping balls

>>730091675
Reroll

>>730091825
Dude, you still rambling about with an obvious stupid post i did? What are you? Fucking 7?

Decide to kill horse for meat and more bone armour

>>730092085
Reroll

>>730091958
Rekt, leave and don't come back skeletal

>>730091432
>>730091666
>>730091825

As you proceed down these fucking back woods roads, you feel your other wrist burning, pulling back your sleeve, you see a seconf brand reading "KEK", and it burns. More than any spicy shits you have encountered. A truly evil being has branded that hand.

Shaking off this pain, you are nearing the village. But as you approach the gates, a wild group of Chicks with Dicks attacks.

You manage to see 4 in a glance but feel you are circled.

They're nearly nude minus leaves and fibers they have crafted, but they have some horse sized dongs.
>9 still decides

>>730092085
Such a stupid idea, eat poopsmoker and share with horsebro, then have hot equestrian homosex with horse bro

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>>730091748
I hope you're doing your best worst OP

>>730092133
Offer Poopsmoker's hole to them as payment for safe passage.

>>730092267
This

>>730092133
Tell them Tits or gtfo

>>730092133
announce to them that it is their lucky day and they have stumbled upon THE SPANISH INQUISITION, FINEST CIRCUS IN ALL THE LAND.

offer to give them a show for a mere 5gp per person.

>>730092133
Use poopsmoker's anus as a shield to absorb their attacking phallic weapons if they indeed attack. Perhaps poo a little to let them know lunch is not settling well

>>730092267
reroll

>>730092319
Winrar

>>730092321
This

>>730092319
our CHA +1 should come in handy here

>>730092321
Roll for this to be auto encounter stance?

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bumping for potential customers

Suddenly, niggers

>>730092319
You can't help but smile, customers, your first at that!

"My ladies or sires, or some place in between, I come today with a treat. A surprise act! My circus, the Spanish Inquisition! You are truly in luck as we aren't yet open, how about a preview show for just 5 gold.....?"

The Chicks wDix look among each other, befuddled at your words, replying with only two words over and over, almost primal in the manner.

"Jub Jub?"

Some how, you feel as though you are speaking with primative woods people from a distant world, perhaps a moon of some sort. (Endor for the dense). But nonetheless they aren't interested in the circus, but more so in stripping you, for what reason you cannot ask or communicate, but they seem to be rougher with Poopsmoker, maybe he'll take the brunt of what ever comes next.

>4 Decides

Bag; 41 gp
Basic Sword & Shield
2x Bracers of child bone
Pelvic Guard of Child Pelvis
3 days rations
Lochness Divination Rod

>>730092753
Stroke your penos? Perhaps I will gain their trust?

Take all dicks like a champ

>>730092753
Challenge their chief to a contest of sexual endurance, using Poopsmoker

>>730092842
Yes this pls

Grow a pair of tits and join the dick women

>>730092842
this

>>730092874
Satan strikes again, I will not be responsible with the power given unto me by kek

>>730092914
Why is this happening to me? Make the 4s stop

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>>730092970

>>730093089
All glory to kek

>>730092874
You shove their firm hands away from the clean ass child's bone you're wearing and simplify your words and gestures. Trying your damnedest to get the leader to come forward.
"ME, Traveler, YOU wild. Me speak to leader? Chief?", you make big motions and bicep curling until they get the memo.

A large assed, eh tittied Barbaric woman parts the crowd and comes to stand before you.

"I Chief. What?"
You reply, "Me BIG Man, me want pass, me take you on with slave."

The Chief seems to accept this.

Poopsmoker, who is none the wiser is stripped entirely and forced to the ground, several large untamed cocks ravage his cornhole for a warm up, then the chief totally destroys what little prostate he had left.

BUT POOPSMOKER IS NOT DEFEATED! Whether that be sheer luck or the sword up the ass earlier, he powers through!

But afterwards, the chief still seems.... eager...
The chicks w dix lead you away with your worn slave in tow to their small huts on the outskirts of the big city.

After you just get cozy, the chief comes to you, and says
"We lose, you BIG man, we make VERY happy.."
You are treated to a feast and a harem
(OP would like some vanilla big booty bitches porn dumped ;) )
You rest for the night and are fed. Poopsmoker is seeming to get into his new job.

>1 decides what we do in the morning

>>730093594
More? Thats the kinda figure I like. Links are also appreciated ^///^

>>730093465
Start The Day With A Good Rub N Tug! Perhaps use pooperSchmidt's freshly widened Anus for a cereal bowl?

>>730093465
Poopsmoker is getting too happy...
Kill him in his sleep and use the bones for addition armour/weapons

>>730093679
pretty old porn now, but look up lani lainey, aka lani pawg. she's done numerous amateur vids you can find on like xhamster and stuff

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>>730093761
Jynx maze, personal fave. Reroll for this fella

u are a fag

>>730093894
u are a double fag

>>730093959
Nice, fucking roasted him a good one!

>>730093761
You enjoyed your feast and Harem.. but not as much as Poopsmoker seems to be loving his ass fucks and being pushed around. Submissive fuck makes you so mad. YOU GAVE HIM THAT CHANCE and now he's letting it get to his head! (Or so you have decided)

So, in your remaining hours of night light, you drag Poopsmoker out to the treeline and slash his throat open. He awakes in a shock but can't yell. He starts to choke and cry.

"No you dont bitch! No death till I say so!"
You proceed to fuck the slit in his throat until he dies along side your climax. Weighing your options, you whittle his skull into a cuo for your junk, as the rest wasn't much good.

You leave your decapitated employee to rot and get a good start on the day

>0 decides

>>730093761
He just saved your ass (literally).
Should at least keep him alive for now.

>>730093828
regardless thanks, need to build a porn folder for pawgs or get a chubby fuck buddy, but for now, I say thanks

>>730094065
I have to get ready for work, so I'll roll for the previous 666 curse to activate, ascending us to a higher form more effective for the raping. Kek don't fail me now!

>>730094065
Take some dick chicks to the village with you

>>730094275
Reroll

>>730094233
Dubs allows it, You grow a second cock in place of your fallen comrade, let his skull nestle all your junk.
>0 still decides

>>730094233
Reroll with the intent to become a diety to the dick chix

Head onto the village after somehow impregnating the dick chicks

its time to make use of our loch ness monster wand.

ritually sacrifice 3 gold and 5 silver pieces to nessie in exchange for divining where in the city we can find a magical piece of treasure which would aid our rise to heroism.

>>730094583
Reroll

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>>730093465

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>>730094602
reroll

>>730094727
LOVE THAT ONE
Sawss?

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>>730094602
rollin

0

We find a young shemale in the tribe to replace Poopsmoker, give them a verterbrae buttplug for practice

>>730094884
this
and then
this
>>730094602

Head to the next village bringing 3 dick chicks along

>>730086196
did anyone find the brothel?

>>730094968
Reroll

>>730094965
rollin

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>>730094812
sorry no idea got plenty of big booties though

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>>730094965
rolling

>>730094583
Rolling

>>730095048
Damn, well keep posting em lol, I appreciate ya for it.
Still waiting on
>dat 0

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>>730095128
I gotchu' fam
>>730095090

Go back to quest faggi also dubs

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entering the village we should offer Poopsmoker 2 to the village elders

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>>730095339
her ass reminds me of tubby custard

>>730095090
As the morning comes, you seek out a new assistant. The chief, enjoy the time she had with you last night, offers a gift, a choice from 3 girls with dix.
"you pick ONE"
So you decide to pick one, you pick the most hung and busty one possible.
(Dubs picks her name)
She speaks VERY little common and seems skittish.

After getting your new slave, you raise your Rod of Divination to the sky dropping 4 gold, as you lack proper change, and call for the assistance of the Loch.

"NESSIE I HAVE PAID THE COST< NOW POINT ME IN A DIRECTION OF INTEREST!"

You hear nothing, feel nothing, and over all feel it failed, but are called to a very vague location in the big city

>3 decides

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>>730095432
First we need to break in Poopsmoker 2.

After that head into the village and seek out an Inn. Possibly to perform, possibly to pick up quests

>>730095185
damn... would bury face/10

New assistant is Named Mia Khalifa

>>730095432
slave is named Buxom Betty Big Bone

it's time to enter the city and barter for a pavillion tent large enough to hold our show and a modest number of viewers.

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>>730095601
>>730095621
somewhere between these

>>730095432
Start up circus attraction with the slogan "Traps aren't Gay"

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>>730095690
reroll

>>730095782
Reroll

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>>730095782
lol

Give slave (now named tits McGee) Viagra pills to stimulate performance

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>>730095690
re-reroll

>>730095947
Reroll

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>>730095690

fuckin' 3 PLEASE!!!!!

>>730096063
You name your new slave Betty Boner the 2nd. She doesn't seem to have any input on that, so you head out to the village.

You manage to find your carriage with some starving horses still locked up. But they have enough life to make it in town, once in you shop for a big top tent and settle for a few ship sails sewn together and some wood posts.

All in all that costs you 21 gold.
While shopping you manage to stumble across a pawn shop that may be interesting. But you feel an overwhelming urge to find a certain bar for Nessie's sake

> 6 decides

>>730087587
Ha it's just like a normal d&d session!

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>>730096395
Go to the pawn shop and find assorted items (musical instruments, furniture etc.) to use for the performance.

Drop them off and head to the bar.

>>730096555
That is what I aim for, thank you

Look around and realize you're in the land of the weeaboos after seeing a bunch fat neck beards and slant eyed yellow people peeving on Betty

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>>730096555
trips deserves to decide

>>730096692
Reroll

>>730096716
So be it
>>730096555
decides

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>>730096617
fuck it, do this

>>730096692
Perving*

>>730097082
Last one for me guys, feel free to keep the story going, only so long I can stay awake.

You hit up the pawn shop, seeing an assortment of goods, some neat, others cheap trash.
You do manage to find a few instruments in it all.

2 flutes and a small guitar type instrument. Like a ukelele.

You actually get them free of charge, as the store clerk puts it-
"If she's putting on a show YOU better have some good equipment I suppose.." and winks at Betty Boner, most likely not seeing her horse cock.

Dropping these off at your tent, Betty Boner the 2nd attempts to talk to you.

You rather would want her quiet, or making money, or both...

> 5 decides

Bag; 16 gp
Basic Sword & Shield
2x Bracers of child bone
Pelvic Guard of Child Pelvis
3 days rations
Poopsmoker Genital Cup
A second cock
Lochness Divination Rod

Tackle Betty thrusting your double manhood into him/her/?