I got to kill a person, my wife cheated on me and I want her

>>729708085
Ozone gas while she sleeps.

>>729708085
>get balloons
>mix bleach and ammonia
>breathe in the gas it makes
>fill balloons with said gas
then like, take them over to her house or something, and pop them. I dunno. You fill in the details.

>>729708085
Drink bleach then pee it out into her mouth

You're a retard. Just buy some bleach or pest poison or something.

Anons, i need something for her to eat or drink, do you guys know something about it?

>>729708295
LOL

>>729708341
See>>729708295

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>>729708085
Talk about it on the internet. Good start, buddy!

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>>729708085
no tits = no interest

>>729708085
I do not condone violence and DO NOT believe you should harm anyone, OP.

Mix %60 potassium nitrate and %40 sulfur, you could also add concentrated wasabi (this would act as an irritant) if you want that bitch to suffer.

>>729708085
Engine coolant supposedly tastes sweet and sugary so I guess you could mix it in her drink. I don't know though maybe just shoot her in the face

alot of ground up apple seeds can make cyanide

>>729708085
Poop in her shampoo

>>729708085
Just shoot her you pussy. This isn't science class.

Kit Kats, bitches love kit Kats

>>729708085
>Stab with icicle
>Weapon melts by morning

>>729709600
WTF LOL

Anything with concentrated nicotine would do the trick pretty quickly. Soak a tampon in it and she'll be dead within minutes, even if she pulls it right back out.

just drive her somewhere and purposefully get into an accident. get tboned on her side but as terrible as you can get hit

>>729708085
As everyone knows ricin is the best way to kill someone. source:Breaking Bad

>>729708085
First, get a Quran. Use it to pledge your allegiance to Allah. Resurrect Osama Bin Laden. Ask him to train you. This training should take a while; you want to make sure you're truly ready. Use your training to break the Unabomber out of prison. Convert him to Islam and then ask him to build you a bomb. Make sure it's remote controlled. Attach said bomb to yourself. Buy a goat and put the remote in its ass. Now you're ready. It's showtime. Bring the goat over to your wife and fuck it in the ass in front of her. This will trigger the bomb and you'll blow up. Make sure to scream "Allah Akbar" while you're blowing up. The shrapnel will kill your wife too. Good luck.

>>729708085
...Why not just kill the person she slept with instead of her? This ain't Saudi Arabia, this is America. Shorten your wife's leash, literally.

Cyanide is a poison that does its job.

>>729710945
meh, if it fails you'll horribly disfigure her. Although that's probably as good as killing her.

>>729708085
What you going g to do with body? I can help with that.

You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.

And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig."

>>729711390
fucking kek

antifreeze is good to use and its sweet

>>729711390
>inb4 OP gets away with murder

>>729711850
>antifreeze is good to use and its sweet

Not anymore they started putting a souring agent in it so it could be detected and so dogs wouldn't drink it. You would need bure labe grade ethylene glycol

>>729711390
very detailed, but what will OP do with the hair and teeth?

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>>729711390
God I love that movie.

>>729712173
>bure labe

Pure lab*

>>729711390
Robert Pickton?

>>729712219
D'ya like dags?

>>729709051
How big is the probability of her dying quickly?

>>729708085
You don't want to poison someone, in many jurisdictions that is always 1st degree murder. Don't be a dumby.

>>729712353
The movie Snatch

>>729708085
>my wife cheated on me and I want her dead
Just divorce her like a normal fucking person. How can you possibly be this mad over your wife cheating on you?

>>729712356
Now, dicks have drive and clarity of vision, but they're not clever. They smell pussy, and they want a piece of the action. And you thought you smelled some good old pussy, and have brought your two small mincey faggot balls along for a good old time. But you've got your parties muddled up. There's no pussy here, just a dose that'll make you wish you were born a woman. Like a prick, you're having second thoughts. You're shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your guns, and the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O" written on the side of mine, should precipitate your balls into shrinking, along with your presence. Now... fuck off.

>>729712499
Rich Bitch, I want the money
>>729712407
This is not Murica, we don't have CSI shit here

Interested in killing someone a few states away if anyone has suggestions. Also only want to harm her not her kids or hubs.

>>729712407
this. If you want to kill her, kill her in a way that it won't look premeditated (not really a viable option since law enforcement will find this thread if you do kill her). Or make it seem like self defense.

>>729712890
>Rich Bitch, I want the money
If you're seriously thinking about killing your wife just for her money, you're worse than her. Fucking kill yourself.

>>729712855
I love that part

>>729713066
any more info? Like why? preferred methods? When/where do you think you'd be able to kill her?

i hear sulfur hexafluoride is a good gas to use

>>729713406
Do you know anything liquid or solid to put in her food?

>>729713371
I would prefer to be home with my own family when she dies

>>729713747
Ask a street gang to do the job, normally is better

>>729713836
How do you contact them? Also she lives on a military base. I feel that makes her less accessible

>>729713933
Its a hard quest then, try to contact the gang to kill her when she is outside the base, talk to drug deallers

>>729714307
An issue with that is ive never even been to where she lives but i googled it its actually got a lot of crime and gang activity. I just dk how to approach people about this

>>729714307
Whats the going cost?

>>729713747
The fact that you're states away is tough. You could travel to her state a few days prior to the day you want her to die, but lie about where you're going and take a form of transportation that you know can't be tracked back to you. You could abduct her, wound her in a way that she'll bleed out slowly, and leave her somewhere remote so she can't find her way back to anyone. Idk. That's my best suggestion. You could hire a hitman, but they're usually a shit ton of money.

>>729714521
I don't know, here in Brazil its like 60$-200$ to kill someone, but I cant tell this in the US

>>729714802
Soooo much risk id like to find a hitman maybe 90 days prior...

>>729715122
The only place that I know of that you can hire hitmen from is the dark web, but obviously you run the risk of buying a law enforcement agent instead of an actual hitman.

>>729715381
I like the idea of contacting a local gang chances are someone in that area is both in a gang and has some kind of military base access wether theyre a contractor a dependent whatever... Still interested in the price though dont wanna get jipped but dont want a shitty hitman either

>>729715122
HOW RICH YOU ARE? If you are very rich i may help you

>>729708085
If you don't want your wife to cheat on you; get a bigger cock or divorce her and pray you suck her clit hard enough so she leaves with maybe less than 50% of your shit.

>>729715905
Not very rich the budget would be like 2k at most

>>729711390
This is smart, because if you somehow get linked to the murder, you just play stupid. Nothing remains... At all. You can play it off like she was out of her mind on drugs or something and hungry ass pigs killed her when she wandered off or drunkingly wanted to mess with them. IDK. Good scapegoat though.

IDK. The best way to kill someone IMO is drive a mile or two out in the ocean if you have a canoe or boat, and have them 'fall' out. Then just keep a distance and eventually they will be so exhausted they will drown. When they drown you rescue the body and try to do CPR to crack some of the ribs and call 911 / Coast Guard. Say she fell over and drowned. You tried to rescue her but you couldn't. Then you tried to preform CPR to save her but it failed. That way you are seen as a hero who lost his lover and will be mourned openly, while having the satisfaction of killing that filthy, cheating whore.

>>729715643
I wouldn't trust a gang. I mean, I wouldn't completely trust a hitman either, but there's a chance that local law enforcement might be aware of the existence of any possible gangs in the area and might turn to them first if there was to be a murder.

>>729716096
I already wanted her dead before, i like killing people, i have been in the jail once, killed a dude with a knife

>>729716385
Id like it to be a home invasion while her hubs wasnt home. And the area is crippled with crime...

>>729716529
oh then if that's the case then a gang is probably your best bet. But make sure it's made up of fairly intelligent, organized people and not a bunch of retards

>>729716665
Oh yeah obviouslu i just need to work out the saving the money and finding the gang. Mainly finding the gang... I wonder if i could tell them about some of their valuables and hopefully get a discount... Idk. I just want her dead. I want her husband to believe it just fucking happened. He cant even remotely suspect i knew. Ill also have to find a way to be surprised. I've thought of this and trying to expose our affair in a way that doesnt blantantly appear to have been purposeful. Like he cant know i purposely exposed shit. I have to get rid if her without implicating myself.

>>729708085
>kill
ok champ whatever you say

>>729716529
Then do it yourself. Go to a Sherwin Williams (I think it's Sherwin, if not then Sherman. IDK, going off of memory), and get the full-body suit for painters and shit. Get one or two, then put one on while naked, then get dressed normally, and put a second one on over your underware and shorts, then wear a pair of jeans, and a long-sleeve shirt you JUST bought, get NEW shoes and socks, latex gloves and a hoodie. Use a new roll of duct-tape to tape the ends of each clothing down to prevent leakage of sweat or hair/DNA, and then just use a disposable form of something to kill her with. If not a gun, like a piece of plastic that is hard enough to cut and burn. Then once she is dead, rob yourself of shit, break shit, make your house a mess, and run off to a pre-set up location you have (WITHOUT cameras) and take your clothing off, and burn it all to ash. Then take the ash and dump it in the woods somewhere, scatter that shit in the sea or lake. Then, get an alibi that sets you somewhere else at the time of the murder... Like drive somewhere where there are cameras, and park out of sight, then hop a fence and go on foot and shit. So you can sneak back, hop the fence in the same clothing before you changed out of, get in your car and 'leave' making it look like you were away.

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>>729716665
>street gang
>not a bunch of retards

>>729708085
>>>729712219
>D'ya like dags?
"Wat?"
"I said, D'ya like dags?"

>>729716924
Is that what it's all about? An affair?

>>729717192
No i cant do it myself. Im sleeping with her husband. I HAVE to have an alibi. I HAVE to pretty much be on foortage in my state

>>729717236
not a gang full of niggers

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>>729716529
>found out my girlfriend is married
NOW I MUST HAVE HER KILLED!!!!!

>>7297173
Pretty much. If we both didnt have kids itd be easier. Thats the main reason i cant just expose shit and get her to leave. I also kinda wanna see if maybe shell just catch us. She walked in on a phone call and i heard them argue a bit. Idk though he lefr right after and went for a walk to talk to me

>>729717411
Then go on the Darknet and fork over 10k. That's your best bet for a reliable hitman to whack her. IDK, dude. Do you really want to trust Gangsters? They won't be loyal to your bitch-ass. The moment the cuffs come out, they'll be preaching like a Saint to get reduced time. Especially if they're looking at 1st Degree Murder in the US. That's a near automatic 25-Life sentence.

>>729708085

Well...OP. The easiest method I've seen to make a home poison is the good ol cigarette method.

Step 1: buy a carton of any cigarettes with the ground up nicotine in them or whatever. Pretty easy and cheap.
Step 2: buy the highest concentration of the rubbing alcohol you can find. As well as coffee paper filters.
Step 3: unroll the cigarettes and take the nicotine out of the sticks, for your wife...I'd say about 5 sticks worth just to be safe.
Step 4: get a glass container or beaker and put the nicotine into that and pour the rubbing alcohol in there enough to cover everything in the bottle.
Step 5: boil it for...idk. 10 minutes? However long you think
Step 6: drain the excess using a coffee paper filter, and dispose of the excess liquid.
Step 7: get the doctored up nicotine ground and put it in her food. Make sure it's enough food that she doesn't taste anything out of the ordinary.

This should kill the average 200lbs male in 1-2 weeks maximum. I think it was 3 cig sticks for a 200lbs man so...5 sticks should be more than enough.

Happy hunting OP!

>>729719236
Everything about this is wrong. What third world shithole do you call home, Anon?

>>729719760

Wrong as in incorrect information or wrong as in fucked up? I'm confused

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>>729719972
you've been watching too much CSI. bro tip, TV isn't real.

>>729720208

Straight up it's something I read in some poisons handbook I found digging on the hidden wiki sites. Whether or not it's real is beyond me.

>>729708341
Give her a soda put iodine in it. She'll never notice what it taste like and she'll think it's the soda.

>>729719972
Both. I won't tell you the right way to extract nicotine from tobacco but that technique is definitely wrong.

>>729720535
>b-but i found it on the internet
Jesus fucking Christ, kid. Go to bed.

>>729708085
Or give her grape juice with a ton of Tylenol pills but take out all the white stuff inside the pills and stir them.

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>>729708085

>>729721414
Saved

>>729721414
>how to kill yourself with castor beans