Feels thread? Feels thread

Last time I got laid was 2009. fml

>>729573314
Yep. As a matter of fact I just got chewed out by my dad for 2 hours earlier today. He wants to know why I don't like the girl he's seeing that basically ended my parents marriage. Atop that, he's the hardcore traditional republican type, the the info wars guy; so he had to explain to me why I'm a pathetic loser who stays in his room all day and why my way of thinking is the problem with my generation. It's not even just him either, my mother will play victim after provoking my dad into a stupid ball of rage and pretend she's some good parent who's had to survive through the way he gets.

Anyone else think of suicide regularly? If so, what do you do to avoid those thoughts?

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who else /absolutelyapathetic/ here?
I ascended feels long time ago

>>729575011
Same here, my oldest sister is a degenerate who thrives in the drama my parents create. It's unforunate I still have an 9 year old sister that has to live through all of it. But yea none of my family know I think about suicide or even smoke away the pain for that matter. They'd go ballistic if they knew because they see themselves as good parents, so obv it'd be my fault for wanting to die

>>729575218
Just means you're that much closer to suicide. It's the one's that stop caring you gotta worry about

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>>729576069

I have pretty mad feels story to share, but thing is, do I want to?

thinking.jpg

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>>729576189
1/2

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>>729576267
2/2

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>>729576330

>>729575769
no.
I don't want to kill myself. I don't perceive spending most of my time where I do as waste. It is all about how you perceive your surroundings. You should not constantly stress yourself

>>729576381
My dude I feel you, family is shit, and the obligation we feel toward it is just... It's fucking stupid. It's not as if we choose them, but majority of the time they don't choose us, some people are just the waste our parents have to deal with so they could have kids they actually love and care about.

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Who else here is 20-odd years old with no foreseeable future and no gf?

Part 1 of my life story guys, hope you all enjoy.

>be me, 5 years old
>parents just split up because my dad cheated on my mum
>being 5 I don't really understand it at all
>my first memory was probably a few weeks before this, I was standing by a blacked out glass door at night asking when my dad was coming home
>mum was mostly in tears
>5 so I don't really understand, and end up annoying her
>she starts shouting
>skip forward three weeks and they've broken up, she caught him playing with another woman's tits
>my two sisters and one of my brothers move to Plymouth wit my mum, me and my other brother (3 years older than me) stay with dad
>don't go to school because dad is a massive drunkard
>constantly beats me and my brother because he's fucking wasted all the time
>about a year later he meets another woman, let's call her Fiona (for the memes)
>Fiona's a fucking bitch
>screams and hits us while not drunk
>almost forces neighbourhood kids to beat us up
>one time I get locked in a creepy run down campervan all night around the time I'm turning 6
>get forced to eat off the floor
>if we even ate at all
>brother lost his virginity at 9 while living with dad and Fiona
>bear in mind my brother has mental disabilities, this fucked him up proper, let's call him Brother 1, the loss of his virginity so early will be important later on

>>729577944
>about half a year later of this torture and I'm 6.5 years old B|
>dad is actually sober for once and went to do some shopping
>Fiona walks in
>"the fuck are you doing Anon"
>terrified.jpeg
>"N-nothing Mummy" (forced to call her that)
>realizes I'm eating a packet of crisps
>didnt have permission
>she starts ragin at me, and slaps me in the face
>im on the floor now balling my eyes out
>she's screaming at me, and keeps hitting me
>brother comes in shocked
>she does the same to him
>drags us upstairs to the third floor
>opens windows
>ohplsfuckno.mp4
>drags me kicking and screaming to the window
>never been more scared in my life
>probably high or tipsy because she struggles to push me out
>dad returns
>Brother 1 screaming in the corner out of fear
>dad sprints upstairs and pulls Fiona the fucking bitch away
>blood on my face from the beating
>bruises everywhere
>both me and my brother are shaking, traumatised
>shortly after my dad, even tho he's a massive dickhead kicks Fiona out of the house
>sighofrelief

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>>729577944

>>729573314
Not abusive, but I do feel stunted.

My dad's an engineer- smart guy, and extremely experienced with a lot of the world since he moved a lot since grandpa was in the army. Ever since I was a kid, he's been telling us about everything, and we never really got to experience much for ourselves. My siblings and I kinda just assumed everything about life would kinda just fall into place as he described it, and I never actually learned anything. I just got lectures about school, girls, grades, professors, college, everything. I know he's got my best interests at heart, but I truly don't feel like I've learned anything for myself. I just got a lecture about everything.

>>729577287

i used to be satisfied by literally playing WoW like 12 hours a day for weeks on end i like games still but jesus that was a much darker time in my life than i realized at that point. i think it was just because i was younger and the school system is broke. it felt more productive playing a game than pretending to care about school at the time. luckily my college experience was better. i miss being able to get that satisfaction from games though. there was something very relaxing about it. these days i get like zero satisfaction from anything game related. i have to derive all my enjoyment just from the gameplay as it happens. achievements and missions and trading cards and skins and shit do nothing for me like I would imagine they would have in the past

>>729576580
Every time

>>729578738

engineers generally have terrible interpersonal skills. he doesn't know how to teach and productively interact with you which is no surprise. just be glad you're not poor though. you can sort out everything later as long as you're not worried about where your next meal is coming from

>>729578576
>>729577944
>Dad finally starts to realize he's a prick
>buys us dreamcast
>starts taking us to school
>still alcoholic but struggling to get better
>still heavily bullied but everything seems a little more bearable
>Dad meets another woman, let's call her Ashley
>Ashley is super nice
>Dad reduces alcohol intake greatly
>Nicki treats us with chocolate and basically everything we never had
>things are looking up!
>then she's diagnosed with some back disorder
>Dad struggling with alcohol again
>she isn't allowed to live with us anymore, Dad isn't qualified to take care of her
>they break up
>dad is heartbroken, starts drinking heavily again
>me and Brother 1 most of the time left to our own devices
>starts kitchen fire
>at this point I'm becoming mentally unstable, I even fuckign tried to cut some kids finger off with a pair of scissors, teachers had to drag me away from him with blood spurting everywhere
>only escape I had was learning the gay stuff at school
>inb4 could count past 100 and say hello is 28 languages (a thing we did most people only knew 2 or 3)
>one night dad doesn't pick us up from school
>me and Brother 1 just sit with the teachers
>police turn up with social services
>huh?.png
>get taken by police car to plymouth where our mother lives
>told we have to live with them for now
>Because of some fucking stockholm syndrome shit at the age of 8, I went apeshit when I was told I couldn't live with "Daddy" anymore
>my brother was happy to not be living with him anymore
>I felt pretty betrayed ngl, and so began phase 2 of my fucking god awful life

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I think narsism runs with us B tards but i have 2 brothers and a new born baby sis me being oldest and only born to my dad my mom now hates my dad my mom and step dad brain washed them to hating all my family and anyone who speaks against them like my moms mother but the 2 younger boys are perfect and cant get in trouble but i cant not be left alone with out being verbaly ass raped for being a lazy mf that sites and plays counter strike all day i try to talk about my problems with them and they say im melo dematic i only have my dad and my best friends mom who is like my mom but what ever pic related
How much of this is real whos storys are real whos are fake

>>729579497
What sucks is that I'm pretty bad myself at social skills. He's always pretty good when we have people around us, and since I'm not good at it I can't accurately judge if he's good at it or not. In my eyes, he's really great at being able to talk to people since I get anxious about it a lot.

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>>729572625

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>>729575218
omw there! I've stopped stressing about school, girls, work, and hobbies as much as I used to. Feels ok

>>729579887
>>729578576
>>729577944
>living in plymouth now with Mum, two sisters and two brothers
>I say that, but we also had a step dad now
fat technician guy, we'll say he's called Bob
>all living with bobs family in one house
>super crowded but there's this cool guy Gary who works in the special forces, liked to tell us fun stories
>eventually move out into a set of maisonettes because it's pretty crowded
>Bob and Mum get married
>meanwhile in the life of me and Brother 1, our dad is failing to meet contact rules. the last time i saw him since those terrible three years was 10, where he didnt come to supervised contact
>feeling pretty sad atm, and the struggle sof being in a family start to unfold
>get yelled at by mum and bob for having no sense of respect after being abused for 3 straight years
>struggling in school because i barely ever attended
>no friends
>siblings liked to bully us
>cause it was plymouth most people there were fucking dickheads and beat us up
>Bob started to become abusive to my Mum and me
>eldest sister started behaving wierdly self harming and shit
>inb4 ran away several times
>forced to stay indoors all the time, not allowed to ever go out.
>one time during christmas me and Brother 1 snuck out to play in the snow, the first time it snowed for ages
>bob finds us and drags us indoors
>locked in our rooms
>anyway, so the irst horrible event to happen was that one day eldest sister went mental and smashed me over the head with a wooden pole
>blood started spewing out of my head
>I thought I was gonna die
>forced to wait 2 hours in a sweaty waiting room
>finally get my head stiched up (I still have the scar)
>the next two events are pretty crushing even today

>>729573314
sort of, my family is super manipulative and passive aggressive. Particularly my mother. I tell her im looking at job offers that would take me out of state so I can start my life and leave my boring small town, but they hit me with
>muh family values
>youre abondoning us
>family is supposed to stay together
then hit me with "but hey if its what you want"
I honestly stopped giving a fuck, moving out in 3 months and cant wait

>>729573314
Maybe
I think it was more like I wasen't raised properly
>Mom and dad seperated when I was real young
>They would always fight about money
>Stayed with my mom most of the time but she was gone all day working shitty factory jobs to support me and my five bros
>She would also rather go party with her friends when she had free time
But she stopped doing that when I was like 14 or 13
>She couldnt support us all by herself
>Had to live in my aunts basement for atleast a year
>Mom would try to start non sexual relationships with other guys but it would always end up with them fighting
>Would stay with my dad on the weekends
>We would always do the same thing
>Take us to a fast food resturant
>Go play at a park for couple of hours
>Sometimes take us to a dollar store to buy a cheap toy that would break easily
>Take us to his empty home
>One time he was homeless and we would sleep in his minivan at truck stop
>woke up and saw two guys arguing with each other which led to one stabbing the other
>My two older half brothers are assholes
>Oldest bro would keep me up all night to scratch his back or fungal feet with a fork until he fell asleep
>2nd oldest bro tried to get involved with gangs he also turned out to be a violent schizo
Now im 20, overweight, and a dead beat who has never gotten a real job and still dont know how to drive a car
Only thing I got going for myself is that I got into a commut college with payed tution but im also taking that for granted since I keep missing classes

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>>729573041
KV here who just turned 22

some days it doesnt bother me, And I think it'll happen at some point and im no longer in a rush because fuck it, if its taken this long I might as well pick a good one


other days it ruins my soul

>>729581136
>>729579887
>>729578576
>>729577944
>It's late one night
>neither of my brothers can sleep
>(we all sleep in the same room)
>eldest brother speaks to me and Brother 1
>"Are you awake?"
>the conversation diverts to our penises after a while, I mean we are young boys
>then the eldest brother makes a strange request
>he wants to touch brother 1's penis
>that feeling of dread starts to bubble inside me
>over the next few weeks he forces us to engage in "sexual acts", no penetration or anything but fucking messed up shit
>eventually one night while im pretending to be asleep, my eldest brother and brother 1 are doing stuff
>Mum walks in
>whattheactualfuck.exe
>goes ballistic screaming and shouting
>drags eldest brother shouting downstairs
>calls the police
>he denies it, but gets taken into foster care that night
>I never see him again
>pretty terrified right now

It's not 100% bad tho...:

>be two years ago
>jr in highschool
>already thought life was shit, now its worse but this story isnt about me.
>have friend
>7/10 would bang but she was like a sister
>go to camps together, become closer friends know everything about one another
>basically wife material if i wasnt such a beta fuck
>spending one night out just chilling in a field looking at stars on the hood of my car
>she starts tearing up
>saying that she is having a great time but just doesnt want to go back home
>father is a general alcoholic abusive asshat
>she cuddles with me
>instantboner.jpg
>still feels like sister so just let her cuddle but dont do anything
>fastforward senior year
>taking concurrent classes, dont see her as much
>the one class i have with her had assigned seats
>across the room
>can see the pain in her eyes growing every day
>get a text one night
>"Im sorry anon"
>ask her why
>she doesnt ever reply
>fuckitimnotgonnahearabouthersuicide
>hop in car and speed over to her place
>get pulled over by cop
>right in front of her house
>fuckitidonthavetime
>run into her house
>open the door cop says get on the floor, everyone walked the dinosaur

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>>729582141
I hope she gets better. Death sucks

>>729582045
Thing is I've always been shit with school
I was that kid who never turned in homework but still got passed to the next grade just so they wouldn't deal with me I guess
Until I finally got held back in the 11th grade
Thats when I kinda changed
Put more effort in school got into that free tution program lost 20 pounds because the school I transfered to had a gym, a really shit one but they still had one
Also ate healthier and smaller propertions
But here I am now
In my second semester in commut college and ive gained the weight back and more
I just ditched 2 of my classes today 2 times in a row already

>>729581869
>>729581136
>>729579887
>>729578576
>>729577944

>school was going well
>teachers liked me even though i had unpredictable outbursts
>they started some points system for me
>get my beahavious on track
>still violent though, I end up trashing a classroom one time, and almost drowning the school bully
>(Ahh I don't regret that last one)
>eventually Bob is becoming so abusive Mum leaves him as well
>filed sexual abuse against bob's parents for my new sister (She was only a year), who had problems with her bladder
>she thinks they sexually abused her
>only 1 year old
>mfw
>anyway we leave plymouth and move to a nice seaside town
>by now mum has met another dude
>can't see this going well
>we'll call him fred
>fred is niceish
>we get along
>then he has aback injury
>spends all his time indoors
>starts getting bitter
>at my new primary school I'm a real loser, but I was at least 2 years past my fellow students in education
>inb4 was studying from a GCSE biology book
>doing year 11 maths
>is 10 years old
>basically im a cocky smartass who hates everyone
>start making friends in school, get moved up a year but home is still fucking awful
>but it's abuse that ive seen before
>start to get older and instead of being beaten down i start to fight back
>lol my arrogance has no bounds
>then brother 1 rapes second youngest sister
>he blackmails into not telling for 2 months
>tearing me apart
>asks if I want to join in
>"WHAT THE FUCK NO"
>then Mum walks in again one night
>sees them
>I start bawling my eyes out telling her what happened
>she's shellshocked
>brother spends night in jail
>also put into care
>and o think this all happened because of eldest brother and losing his virginity back when he was young
>life couldn't get any worse, I was now all alone, not allowed to go out
>develop inferiority complex at 11 and be really bitter
>think im better than everyone else
>lose all my sort of friends

>>729583313
>>729581869
>>729581136
>>729579887
>>729578576
>>729577944

>mum eventually dumps fred
>things start to calm down
>I get better!
>My schoolwork becomes more refined
>start working on a novel (I'm currently about 126 pages in, should be finished within a month or so)
>at the moment i'm finishing my final year in secondary school (I live in England)
>aout to do my GCSE's

I wanna do this part not in greentext actually. I met this fuckign amazing girl about a year ago, she really helped me turn my life into something good. Now I've got an amazing future in the Exeter Mathematics School, hopefully leading onto Oxford University. I've got a life with ambitions and friends now. I even sing eh? But, see, I love her guys. She's amazing, she's very pretty, and I asked her ut. It took her two months to give me an answer, and even though she told me she was going to say yes for majority of the time, she ended up saying no. I'm just some memelord who got to know her really quickly, I cnan't possible hope to match up t her expectations. Not to mention after I asked her out, a whole drama ensued, and although we're fine now, she's kinda bipolar with me. One moment we'll be having really kinky chat and be super friendly, and then the next day, maybe even the next hour she'll ignore me and get really annoyed. I dunno what to do /b/tards, she made me the man I am today (Well, 15 year old) and I know most people this age don't look for serious relationships but I've been through so much shit I really do just want one. I can't figure out how to make her happy, but I guess that's just a problem I'm going to have to deal with for the rest of my school life. Definitely for the next 3 or 4 years. I have to be there when she gets her next (And second) boyfriend, I have to see them fucking cuddle and shit. I have to watch (NOT LITERALLY) when she loses her virginity to some other retard and so on.

Anyway, that's kinda my life, thanks for listening

Lol >implying anyone did

Why do I feel I annoy everyone. I'd just like to have one normal friendship where i can make jokes and laugh without worrying ill be seen as weird.

>>729584221
i did anon

2nd episode of heart failure, smoking cigs hoping I don't wake up some time soon. I have quite a bit of chest pains and uneasy feeling most of the time now

>>729584702
Thanks my dude, I really appreciate it

>>729574294
ouch. start standing up for yourself anon

>>729577287
31 here....

>>729572625
I always feel sick. That's all I can say.

>>729584221
I listened anon, damn hard life you've had

Hows the novel going, and what's it about? Good luck with the girl by the way

I recently bought a gun. I've been around guns all my life and enjoy using them to shoot targets and such, to me it's no different than playing darts or pool in that manner. All about hand eye coordination, however you can always just borrow or rent a gun for things like that. I don't live in the country so it's not like it's something I can do everyday.
When I bought it I said it was for home defense and recreational, but that is only part of the reason.
The main reason i bought the gun is so that every day I don't use it on myself I can feel like I've actually accomplished something.

>>729586905
Hey, thanks, the novel is actually going really well. It's called The Cat, The Girl, The House and The Snow (AKA CGHS), it basically followed the life of an amnesiac deity of the forest, after her memory was wiped and she was brought as a pet by this guy. After her owner was killed (Who she had a close relationship with), it explores her journey to remembering, and her discovery of what it means to be human, along with all the pain it entails. I can put the first chapter onto a file sharing site if you want.

And thanks, I'm sure things will look up for me and her soon eh?

Friend just died a couple hours ago.
My s/o was way closer with him than I was, but we'd just started all hanging out more. The kid was one of the happiest people I've ever met (I know people say that shit all the time when people die but seriously he never stopped smiling) and he was the most encouraging and optimistic guy. Just saw him at a party Friday night and said goodbye to him on Saturday morning.
Can't bring myself to make one of those posts on social media about how he was great and all that. It just feels fake whenever I see people doing it. But I hope his family is dealing okay.
Can't stop thinking about the idea of death. As much as you want to see someone again, you never can. There's always that space wherever you go. That kid had a family, dreams, a girl he just started talking to. He never gets that again.
It's all fucked.
I won't say it anywhere but here but I'm sorry this happened to you Wyatt, you didn't deserve it.

>>729587491
I'm alright I'll wait til it's in stores :)

Personally I'm a huge fan of sci-fi and like to write, but feel there is no new ground to break there without being seen as copying

>>729587897
I think with writing sci-fi, there are only two options you can really go nowadays.

1: Super fucking complex ideas like convoluted time travelling that are so good people don't see it as copying

Or 2: Weird ideas, the Douglas Adams type deal

Anyway, good luck with your writing too my dude.

>>729587491
>>729587897
Just wanted to add that your book actually sounds like a new book, not something recycled. I just think the title could use some work, at the moment it's a bit of a mouthful. One thing I learned in English here in the US is that colons and semicolons are very useful, a la "2001: A Space Odyssey" or something or other. I dunno, just a suggestion

>>729588335
Thanks, I'm actually thinking of something rn. It involves the development of warp travel, rather than its prolonged use like most Sci fi novels

>>729584221
Read all of it. One of the biggest advantages in life is having a stable family environment. You didn't get that, but don't let that be an excuse for doing the messed up things that happened to you, to other people.
You're only 15. I always hated when people gave me shit for being young and not knowing anything but it's so true. I'm 20 now and i realise how immature I am. I just hope in the future i can be a good dad/husband and be a decent person.
In regards to the girl, TheRedPill on reddit and The Game by Neil Strauss - two basic things i wish i had at your age. They will help you out tremendously.
Most importantly don't let your past shape your future and never feel obligated to be the same person you were 5 minutes ago.
I wish you all the best anon.

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>>729588354
I would do that, but uhm, the entire chapter naming is based ont he four initial CGHS (That's the short name for the book). Each letter arc has a specific morale and theme it tries to target. For example, G stands for "girl", and (Because she's not actually a human girl, she's an immortal spirit), it explores the human side of personality, the "girl" side, and all her values and shit, etc etc.

On the left you can see the chapters I've done so far, see how they're named? It'd be kinda difficult to change the title now :/

>>729588920
Okay that makes a lot of sense to me now. Since I read mostly sci-fi, chapters don't typically have names so I didn't take that into account. Thanks for clarifying

>>729588601
Hey, thanks for the advice maan. And don't worry, while what happened may have made me a bit of a cynic, I've tried really hard not to do anything, I'm determined to become the best man I can be, to my future kids and basically to anyone. But it kinda left me with the sense that I don't like my family. Even now muh fam doesn't really like me back, but i have friends and a life now so I can just be me.

And I'll check those out, Neil Strauss is a favorite of mine I'll get the book sometime soon. Thanks :D

>>729588478
Warp Travel eh? You're right, it's development is never really touched upon... I'm excited. What's the style of writing like? Gimme something to compare it to.

>>729572625
Don't want to die for the first time in 13 years, don't know what to do with myself.

>>729589699
First step is to do something stupid and silly, be a normal guy :ok_hand:

Then just have fun, all you can do.

>>729589364
Np man.
Free pdf of the entire book if you Google it, focus less on the lines and more the basic concepts behind them

>>729589484
I haven't even started yet, so no clue I'm good with neat ideas, just not putting them into action because lazy/high school. I was thinking something like Dune in its epic-like characteristics

>>729589985
Will do. I also have a book called The Power Of Charm, it's a great read if you haven't already, written by Brian Tracy and Ron Arden. It basically kinda cured my unlikeability/arrogance and made me a pretty good teacher/public speaker.

>>729590206
Ahhhh Anon, my friend, good ideas may as well not exist without action. I encourage you to start, the world will only become better from your writing, and if it's even half as epic as Dune I'm sure it'll be great. I have one piece of advice, DEFINITELY make sure you focus on the times in the book when something epic is not happening. Because that is 95% of your book, especially if it's long. You want those parts to be interesting, but no too much so that it makes the epic parts seem normal. That's what separates an incredible book from an ok book.

Looking at these comments makes me reminisce about my days of depression. I would sit alone and watch everyone have fun while I know I had no fun or friends. I get the feels when looking at what you guys/girls are going thru cause I have been there. Hope yall are doing ok.

>>729576580
I used to be like this bros, it gets better trust me

>>729590981
So what you're saying is that the climb to climax should be interspersed with small "bumps" to excite the audience on the way? I'm good at writing essays because those have a given structure, but a sophisticated plot structure escapes my freshman mind

>>729591185
I'm holding out hope, can you suggest anything to help a young anon?

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Does anybody have the greentext story about an anon who fell in love with a girl in high school? It was about a girl who would dress up in unsual dresses that were more fitting for dolls and only lived with her grandma, I think. Someone please help. I need to feel.

I'm gonna post a short clip from King of the Hill, the best adult swim show imo. Sorry for low quality

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EJH5YEJ9iLc

Texted a girl who I thought was my friend a funny joke and they didn't reply, but 10 mins later I saw they liked my friends picture on Instagram...so that hurt a little.

>>729592231
I know that feel anon, some people just have a different sense of humor and maybe she was put off by it. Who knows. My innate paranoia tells me bad things, but in all honesty she may not get it, or maybe she didn't read it or see it. For me it's an internal battle over what happened, but for you that's different. Ask her if it's eating at you, maybe shoot another joke.

>>729574294
Yeah like 2 hours ago as a matter of fact. But didn't cause I remembered one of my friends needs to be picked up at the airport on Friday.

>>729592755
Alright I guess I should elaborate on this...I've told this girl about how I'm more/less an alpha at social interaction and how I only trust her with anything I say (other than /b/ because anon) but she continues to do shit like ignore me when I text her and then do other shit that I can see. I know it's not blatant and that she probably doesn't know that I can see what she likes, but it still hurts nonetheless when the only person you can feel like you can trust can't even text you back...even if its a joke.

>>729577287
Yeah life sucks , what it do

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I'm 22yo and I literally never had a friend in my whole life.

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>>729572625
I'm just tryna play some Overwatch and a song comes over my YouTube mix. It's a song by my old friend. We used to make songs together. He excelled while I was too depressed and self-critical to keep up.
>mfw I'm a fucking loser playing vidya and he's a successful producer

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>>729593289

>>729585521
Kind of corny but I love this
>too much pressure teach

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>>729593289
That's basically the girl I'm having trouble with right now. :/

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Anyone lurking?

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>>729595118
always

I'll post a picture when the thread seems to be dying down.

>>729595118
I posted but no one replied. So I suppose I've been relegated to lurking

>>729594709
I wish I had my own Helga gf
:(

>>729595118
I'm here still I need general advice on how to live a good life and what mistakes to avoid before going to college/moving into the real world

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>>729595231
I know that feel.

I just hope that whatever I post, regardless of the lack of replies, is enough to let whoever's lurking to let it out. We all need to shed a tear every once in awhile.

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>tfw I'm an unlikeable piece of shit

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>>729593578
Many of us stay friendless, but eventually we find that ONE person who completes us. A companion or a lover, time will take its' toll

>>729575218
Right here my man. At the end of the day. Nothing matters. We're all meaningless.

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did someone say spiderman thread

Tonight I miss her.

>>729595649
Hopefully. Well time to sleep it off. I suppose I can always talk to my old friend in my dreams. Lord knows he's too good for a lowlife like me now

>>729596061
Goodnight, friend. Try to work at bettering yourself in the morning. One step at a time, my friend.

>>729595877
We need to keep this thread alibi, so sure I guess

Keep them feely please

I was sexually abused for months by my stepdad. I remember it clear as day. I told the therapist in my therapy group when the topic came up. Her job required her to tell the police. Issue here is that without my stepdad, we have no income. So I was forced to say I lied about the entire thing, no one believes I was abused and I'm starting to feel like I made it up.

My mom threatens me that she'll force me to tell my "lie" to my real dad and hopes I get in trouble about it.
Pretty basic life i guess

>>729595804
Did you ever find her/him?

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>>729595877
Spiderman out of noware!!!
MIJ?

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These people are dead.

Two real human people, a man and a woman who got separated for who knows how long reunited, the moment captured in this picture.

They must have been so happy, to just feel each others warmth and laughter, the girl probably teared up a little too, knowing he will have to leave again. He has to treasure every moment he has, her voice, smell, and mere presence. He didn't know if he could see her again, if he would die in a year or four.

Eventually they all died.

They couldn't do a damn thing but experience the horrors of war.

What was he thinking in his final moments? What was he looking at? The sky, smelling smoke, clutching his stomach?

What was she feeling? Was she raped? Did she whisper his names on her coarse lips as the emotional pain ticked on and on, wishing he would would through the door to save her?

I hate life and history, I hate how cruel people can be.

>>729596290
I was sexually abused several times by my cousin when I was little but my situation isn't as frustrating as yours. I'm sorry this happened to you, anon

>>729596294
Not yet, but I have many years ahead of me.

You'll never find an old person who has not had one of those people, even if it is brief.

>>729596744
Thanks anon. Ive never told anyone about this so I really appreciate your kindness

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haven't saw her for like 3 years
dont realy want to forget the few good times we speend
But i feel like it's time to move on

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When did life get so complicated?

I really need to shit.

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>>729584952
Why you do this to me?

>>729596943
When feminists and cultural marxists fucked everything up.

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>>729593599
I'm sorry dude. Maybe when I get good at making recordings my band is happy with we can make something together

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>>729596855
That's why we are here right? Stay strong, you are not alone

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>>729594709
Helga felt it, sorry Helga

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>>729596943
When The Dulce Base Became a CRATER in the GROUND!!! Fucking Fuck... Goddam genetic testing to find a gene sequence that does not mutate after the 3rd genetic clone... FUCK NIGHTMARE HALL FUCK DULCE AND FUCK THE PEOPLE WHO THINK THEY R IN CHARGE I RUN SHIT NOW STARVE... AMEN...
KEK

>>729572625
YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA BE
THE ACE OF SPADES

>>729596761
Well, I'll try to keep my hopes up. Thanks anon

I'm saying goodbye to the city I grew up in. Got mixed feelings about it but there really is nothing left for me here now. I've grown to hate walking it's streets with all the ghosts and memories haunting me as I listen to the lonely drone of traffic passing buy. Everyone I ever knew here have all come and gone from my life now so it's time to say goodbye. Goodbye Toronto.

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BELIEVE ME I GOTS A SHIT LOAD MOAR...
KEK

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>>729597514
RIGHT DIRECTLY UNDERNEATH OUR FEET...

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>>729596920
Yoo. I text her everyday even though I haven't seen her in about 3 years. We had sex the last time I saw her and it felt right. It wasnt supposed to end I guess. She replied all the time and conversated and actually tried. Lost her number for 2 months and now I know she has someone else. I can tell by her not responding as much. Fuck.

> be me
> 18
> live whole life as a social outcast because of strong opinions and convictions
> meet absolute qt3.14 blonde junior in German 3 class
> talk all day and all night
> she's conservative and red-pilled as fuck
> constantly talks shit about dindus and how feminists are shit and she wants to be a housewife
> starting to fall in love with her but try not to make this obvious
> she's in a relationship with some absolute cuck that doesn't mind me obnoxiously flirting with her
> he doesn't even fuck her
> bring her back to my place one night
> was still a kissless virgin
> she cuddles lovingly up against me
> what the fuck are all these new feelings?
> she looks up at me with her beautiful brown eyes
> kisses me passionately on the lips
> I proceed to slide my hand down her pants as we make out on my bed
> I lose my virginity that night
> months pass
> I finally have the one thing I've never had in my entire life...a person that loved and cared about me
> she comes over every night and wraps her petite little body up against me
> she's so small she can just cling her entire body to one of my arms as we cuddle together and her head nuzzles against my chest and she sleeps peacefully
> I'm a senior
> offered a fuck ton of scholarships to a university a good distance away
> I'm leaving this summer and won't be coming back that often
> that feel when I know I'll probably never see my first kiss...my first sexual partner...my first lover...my first everything likely ever again.

fuck...the circumstances of life can be so cruel sometimes.

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>>729597598
THATS RIGHT THIS DRILL IS HUGE AND WEVE HAD THEM SINCE THE 50s WE LIVE ON TECTONIC PLATES ALLRIGHT... JUST LIKE FINAL FANTASY 7 IN MIGAR EXCEPT THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD IS OBLIVOUS
KEK

>>729597786
If you're in love, fuck scholarships and university. It's not a requirement in life, and it's probably sure as hell more boring and lifeless than leaving her.

What would happen to her if you leave? What will this conservative housewife do in this modern world? She'll be so vulnerable anon..

Most of us don't have your choices, do us a favor and not spit on life for matching you with a girl to love.

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>>7295979
THERE IS NOWHERE LEFT TO DRILL... IM SUPRISED THE EARTH DOESNT COLLAPSE IN ON ITSELF WE LIVE ON THE FUCKING DEATHSTAR...
KEK

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>>729598231
this tbh

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>>729598245
DONT WORRY ABOUT WHERE I GOT MY PIC ITS LEGIT...Heres some of the cages they kept the genetic expiraments in...
KEK

>>729598231
I know man, I know. I'm trying so hard to find a solution. She says she doesn't want to imagine life without me. I know we're young and all, but fuck man...she's so perfect. And I know from being around here that not a lot of us ever get to feel something like this and I don't want to ever lose it.

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>>729598539
Whats THE MATTER HAVE I STRUCK A NERVE YET???
MIJ?

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>>729598586
Yet here you are deciding if you want to abandon it all for some university. Maybe life is just testing your loyalty? Ever feel like life is fucking with you?

You can always go to college anytime during your life, but these opportunities are once in a lifetime chances.

If you're going with the redpilled gal, MAKE SURE you love the hell outta her. Then you'll just need to memorize all of it to tell your kids.

>>729597331
rip lemmy

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>>729598734
My Apolagies for the question mark after MIJ if I dont put a questionmark there they will ban me for a signature...
MIJ?

>>729598847
yeah, she's always talking about how she's always wanted to just pop out a bunch of kids and stay home and cook dinner. She's as feminine as can be. And you know that's like finding a fucking diamond among rocks in this SJW-hellhole society we live in. I'll take your advice to heart, anon. I won't lose her.

This is the ultimate it might make you kill yourself
https://vimeo.com/210862415

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>>729598931
THATS RIGHT... IM THE FUCKING MAN AND I RUN AREA 51 AND EVERY ASPECT OF MISSION IMPOSSIBLE I CONTROL OPERATOR DAD BRANDON BECAUSE HE MADE ME OPERATOR GOD NOW FUCK OFF IF U KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT...
MIJ?

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I can't fall in love. I don't know why, I just can't. And I've hurt a lot of people around me because of that.

Why can't I fall in love

Why

Straight/m/23

>>729599276
You haven't found the right one yet, anon. But don't worry, she'll break your heart. Then you'll know love.

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>>729572625
I spent the last 6 years and most of my college career chasing a lie...

Now what?

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>>729572625

Heres your feels

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>>729599276
YES FUCKING WAY WHERE DO U THINK WE HOUSE THE REPTILIANS(D) AND THE ZETA(EUE)

>>729599432
*sigh*

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>>729599512
YOU ONLY SIGH CAUSE YOU KNOW ITS TRUE...
MIJ?

>>729599334

I wish I got my heart broken for once, just to reassure myself that I am, indeed, an actual person and that I'm not some degenerate with a fucked up emotional disorder.

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>>729599641
thats right i run the fucking government when they do something i dont like i starve the bastards untill they make it right again...
MIJ?

>>729599641

Your posts are very annoying. Can you stop for a second please?

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>>729599914
fuck off and wake the fuck up and read something u 12 year old bastard get the hell of my /b/
MIJ?

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>>729599914
thats right go make a new thread and dig your hole deeper ur gonna die in that hole get used to it...yes holy sghit i know what ur thinking...

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I've been feeling down for the last 3 years
I'm fucking stupid and socially awkward
I have accepted that I'll most likely will live and die alone, and probably broke working minimum wage jobs but deep inside I wish I didn't.
So how about some cheap laughs to cheer you guys up
>just fucking end me already ffs

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There are many days in which I really regret waking up.

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>>729594709
Anyone else hyped for the next movie?

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>>729600211
Fuck off? GROW UP!!!
MIJ?

/b/ i don't know what to do im probably retarded but my whole life ive never been able to show really any true emotions and ive just learned to act certain ways so i don't seem like such an outcast but I'm getting to a point where im getting so lonely because i just come off to people wrong anything to remedy this?

>>729600528
Its OK anon I try to not show emotion when I'm around friends or family so they don't take advantage over me or make fun of me
But the more I act like this I feel I'm doing something wrong
And I can't stop it

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>>729600442
fucking goddam nazis and cia project paperclip FUCK THIS PLANET I WISH THIS WHOLE WORLD WOULD SELF DESTRUCT...
MIJ?

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>>729597233
Wtf has 4chan become

>>729600813
But im not even acting I'm just socially backwards as fuck but ive got a grip so i can live a somewhat normal life but i can't make anything more than equatinces

It hurts, to know now that i was only ever a danger to him, to know i was the one he could ever tell his parents about, who he would never tell his friends about, im the one he could never turn his back on because he thinks ill be to one to slip a dagger there, but i think for now thats enough. Im ok, as long as im not completely alone... for now.

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1/5
Alright /b/ I finally got the guts to tell my story of my biggest mistake i made
>late 2015
>be shitty artist but I tried
>be a huge fan of this one artist on tumblr
>really want to be freinds with her
>finally got the guts to talk to her
>i asked for her steam and if we can be freinds
>She says yes
>happy as fuck.jpg
>i added her to steam
>we talked about lots of things
>finally got the guts to show her my art
>she liked it and said i can improve
>i cryed i was so happy
>i showed her one really cringey nsfw picture i made
>she said that she have seen it on some booru
>she told me she also draws for a thread on /vg/
>she sended me the link to the booru and thread

>>729592667
Holy shit kids are evil

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>>729572625
>when you type "i love you" on your phone
>when autocorrect puts your ex's name at the end

fuck I'm so lazy and anxious I can never get anything done
>no willpower

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>be very introverted and socially awkward
>everyone at school constantly insulted me and mocked me, even teachers would sometimes join in
>the only few who didn't treat me like that would treat me with pity as if I was a kid with special needs
>dad was an abusive asshole to mom and left us when I was 11
>had to live with my grandma for a few months when I was 14
>during that time a lot of jewelry got lost from my grandma
>everyone immediately thought I did it and all at the same time tried to make me confess shit I didn't do by insulting and threatening me
>they found out who did it some time later
>never heard a single apology from them
>had a nervous breakdown at 16 and dropped out of highschool
>spend the next few years just living like a hermit and getting fatter
>try getting therapy with different psychologists
>waste of time, doesn't help for anything
>try to man up and start looking for a job but panic attacks and anxiety makes nobody want to hire me(obviously)
>never had a single friend
>I'm 22 now
>I've lost most of the extra weight I had
>everything else remains the same

I'm still wondering why I haven't killed myself yet

>>729601117
2/5
>clicked on the links
>I was greeted with tons of artwork from her and many other artists I was fans of
>she told me not to post there because she told me I wasn't thread material and these people are huge dicks
>didnt care what she said I was happy I found a hub of my favorite fan artists
>be at the end of December of 2015
>my ego was blasting with autism
>finally post on that /vg/ thread
>post a shitty doodle i made
>post my username on the post aswell
>some anons found my old Da and also found a collab i did with her
>start ripping to shreads me and her
>feel like shit.jpg
>i told her i was sorry but she said it wasnt a big deal it wloud cool off

>>729600937
It has always been like this you fucking newfag. Sorry that this don't turn out to be you super secret edgy club

>>729599362
I sort of want to print and use that calendar but I wonder how people will judge me when they see it

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>>729601117
>>729601910
3/5

>be one of the worst years of my life early 2016
>people still making fun of me and her
>some anons used fake mes to harass her
>ENOUGH.PNG
>finally got the guts to post there
>this only made things worse but I didn't care
>people started throwing stupid insults at me and to the point where they called me a shitposter
>it finally got to me.jpg

/b/ please just hear me out
I'm a looser. I have everything to be happy and find success.
I have a wonderful girl that loves me to death and I lover the same way. My family is high middle class ans I go to a good college. I just cant, I hate myself too much, I hate what i do and dont do.
The only real reason I havent killed myself is because I love my girl too much.
I just cant get out of my hole ans atar doing something, I have done it but always end up in the same old hole

>>729601910
>>729601117
>>729602285
4/5

>get really depressed
>when I get depressed I tend to do stupid and autistic things
>go to a cringe subreddit
>post the link to the booru there and post a few pictures there
>I forgot I did this the next day
>a few weeks later
>some anon found the posts on Reddit
>and they linked it to me
>hugest shit show ever .jpg
>deiced to leave
>she starts to tell me how I was a huge asshole and she didn't want to be friends with me anymore
>what have i done.jpg

>>729603287
what the fuck is a looser? someone who is more loose than others? oh. i think you meant loser. a very SIMPLE FUCKING WORD THAT IS VERY FUCKING EASY TO SPELL. if english was your second language, i would give you a pass. you speak too well for that to be the case. dont worry about your girl, she will find a man worth being with, unlike you. the only real mark on this planet that you will actually make is the bloodstain left by the 12g. just FUCKING kill yourself already, you dumb nigger

>>729591346
Go to the Literature board for this kind of stuff, the guys over there are a bit critical but will definitely try to help you.

>>729604261
gotta bump here, because my worst fear is this LITTLE FAGGOT NOT SEEING MY POST. i cant fucking stand the idea of him continuing to cohabit this planet with me. already too many cucked beta pieces of shit.

>>729603287
one more bump, i want you to know what a fucking pussy you are and the fact that the world is better off without you. please fucking kill yourself. let that be the only thing you get right in your entire fucking life. no one ever really loved you, and no one will. you say you have a gf that loves you, but i guarantee that she is fucking someone worthwhile, and pretending that shes into you. there is definitely someone handling that for you, because you are a pathetic piece of shit that cant please a woman. fucking die in the worst way you worthless cunt

>>729587696
i know that feel, the emptiness

there's nothing i can say to make it better, but i thought it might be nice for you to know that someone out there understands

>>729604916
get a grip aspie

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>>729603799
>>729602285
>>729601910
>>729601117
5/5 END

>out of guilt and remorse I unfriended her
>I couldn't sleep without thinking of her
>I still lurked thread to this day
>see that she is still being made fun of because of me and they say she's a "cancer magnet"
>I took some time to think of what I did
>I AM A MONSTER.JPG
>3 mouths later
>finally man up again to talk to her
>I said "hey it's been awhile"
>then she says "I recall there being a reason why"
>then tells me how she's not interested in not being friends with me anymore and told me to leave her alone
>i am toast.jpg
>be Christmas of 2016
>be giving and happy
>remember she really wanting a game
>check her steam page if she had it
>she didn't
>why the fuck not.jpg
>buy her it and send it via email
>messange her on Tumblr saying
"hey I got you a game for Xmas"
>I suddenly got a message by her saying "why are still trying to patch this up"
>well shit.jpg
>start going on a rant about how she was a cunt
>she starts ranting of how I was a childish asshole
>leave.jpg
>be the 3rd day of January of this year
>I get a friend request
>it was one of her friends
>he wanted to know what my side of the story was
>tell him it
>I also told him I was really sorry for what I did and I wloud do anything to let her know i was sorry
>he felt bad for me
>and said its ok we all made mistakes

so this is me story /b/ I hope you enjoyed it and i hope you can learn from my mistakes

>>729601067
stop worrying about it. tell people how you feel, don't be afraid to let it out. if they don't like it or they make fun of you for that, then ask yourself why you care what they think. and no matter what you do, own it; nothing beats confidence. so be confident in your emotions, whatever they may be

like most things, it takes time, but it works. I'm trying to escape the same void in which you find yourself

i hope I helped

>>729589420
you're goddamn right

The girl I like is literally telling me on Snapchat that she is thinking about sending nudes to some guy she just met. I'm telling her don't but I don't think I'm convincing her. All I feel is hopeless despair and rage. I'm such a fucking cuck right now.

>>729607798
Cut off that relationship

>>729605690
oh, guy
oh man anon, I feel bad for you
all you wanted to do was be friends with an artist you liked, and you got thrown into the devil's own bastard grinder of autistic fire and fury, put there by the very person you wanted to like
a mere infant of the internet mistaken for someone else because you dabbled a bit in porn
if you're telling the whole story then I don't think you're to blame
I'm so sorry

>>729608288
I know. I know. I just thought she was a kind and innocent girl. My reality is just shattering before me. She has never even mentioned anything close to sexual before.

>>729605542
lel

I'm in love with a girl I met on the internet. She already has a boyfriend and is 6 years older than me. I don't really know what to do appart from killing my self. (my life is pretty shitty overall, i don't want to kill myself just for this btw)

Does anyone else type out their story only to delete it? I always put good amount of detail then feel vunerable.
I am finally writing it, highly condensed. If anyone wants more info on one of the points, ask.

>molested by dad as a child
>diciplined excessively by mum
>dad loses job and I go to public school
>brother and I get bullied
>brother turns psycho and starts fights to the death, attacks me in my sleep, bullies me hard
>parents do nothing
>in secondary school got bullied hard for being smart/posh/small
>bullied constantly 14 hrs/day
>want to an hero
>dad hasn't held a job for more than a few months, comes out as tranny, blames all of his issues on 'discrimination'
>marriage going badly, neither want to end it
>play LoL when I can, learn how to deal with toxic kids
>mature, manipulate brother and chavs into leaving me alone, gain full control of emotion
>secretly cause parents to hate each other and divorce
>life is good, barely have to talk to autistic brother and father
>become popular for destroying the
>friends I have at this point are making money off csgo, I am too late to join because I was sorting out my situation. They have no idea of what happened at home.
I am looking to go to Cambridge, have plans to make 2k /mo gold farming 0 effort and get challenger in LoL (am master atm)

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i just leaked this pic from snapwhores .com

>>729609378
Get off 4chan.
Meet some normie chicks.
Fuck them.
Rinse and repeat.

Girl sent me a vid of her singing on Insta with a guy playing guitar in the background. Asked how I was with a wink face ; ] then corrected it to : ] saying lol.

She just got out of a relationship. Not looking to be a rebound.

>be 19
>4'3"
>4.5" dick
>extremely socially awkward/anxious

Basically I've been naturally selected out. I am what happens when the wrong people breed. I've come to terms with this

>>729572625
https://discord.gg/ZdjwRzr

>>729610429
The only problem I see here is the lack of centimeters

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>>729595877

>>729610429
5'3" not 4'3"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jm3LEmFFj2g i'm just leaving this song here.
Gets me everytime.

Have a paper due later today before 5pm. Havent started writing it yet. Not freaking out yet but I know it's on the way. It's about the internet and isolation/intimacy relationship

>>729576189
>tfw was in that thread...

I'm in a committed relationship with a girl I definitely don't deserve. She's nice, caring, and always puts me first. Only issue I have is she has a kid with a jalapeno prick. I think whatever's everyone my age, (27), has a kid. What's the harm in just being with her? Well i worked at a range with some very cute girls, temptation was high, sex with gf was low. Anyways she went through my phone and saw i was flirting with another range girl. I hurt her bad. Still with her, working to patch things up, she still wants to be with me after that. Worst part is...i miss the other girl more. Probably just lust.

>>729599767
Just read a greentext about a dog in a feels thread. The crushing of your soul and the perfect life you planned out being dashed away is something I wouldn't want to wish on too many peoole

anon from
>>729611647
Here.
"self harm and attention whoring because I am a fucked individual craving the pain and sight, and an egotistical, self-centered bastard."

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i don't even know what to do anymore. it's not even like i had a bad life, my life's been great so far. i've had friends, girlfriends, my parents were good to me every step of the way. but i just don't want to live anymore.

i want to end it, but at the same time i don't want my parents to be traumatized/disappointed.

so i came up with a plan; i'm going to join the army. if i get shot in the field of duty, my parents won't think i died for nothing...


right? they won't be mad or scared, right?

>>729596718
Do something with your intellect

Anyone else here just fed up with existence? That overbearing sense of restlessness as a result of knowing full well the colorlessness and soul crushing monotony of modern life? It all seems like a perpetual pissing match of sorts, albeit on a much grander and complicated scale. Whose generic wooden box is larger and better furnished? Who has incurred the most credit card debt buying cheap plastic shit? Whose bed of chemically treated sod is a deeper shade of radioactive green? Whose children are better at football?

I don't want a family and frankly, none of you should either. Bringing another human being into this mechanical existence would be a tremendous disservice. I feel less and less of an organic human being and more and more of a soulless automaton with each passing day.

But hey, at least weed and LSD exist.

>>729602160
You're not the eptiny of 4chan faglord

>>729608909
Stop it right now faggot

Plenty of bitches out there

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>>729584221
Thanks for sharing your story, Anon. What's the novel's name? I'd be happy to support you :)

>>729613908
Drugs only make it worse, at least in my case.

>>729609400
Damn man.

I haven't played league in years. Since season 2 i think. But I'd reinstall it just to play with you.

Keep going and don't ever stop.

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>>729572625
>last night I dreamed of the only girl I've ever held hands with (but it led to nothing more serious back then)
>this was 8 years ago
>in the dream we were sitting down by a river with our former classmates
>I was holding her in my arms and we kissed
>I felt nothing
>wake up in my cold, trashy 1 bedroom apartement
>sitting here since waiting until I have to go to late shift

Is it possible to ever accustom to those feels of loneliness?

>>729595990
Ayyy

>Be me
>24yrs old
>had no wealth
> doesnt have any own house and car
>didn't finish college
> had gf but left me bc im poor
>no parents support
>part time on internet shop

idk why im still here.. i just want to be happy

thnks 4chan for entertain me. in my darkest life

https://discord.gg/ptFy6

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlKhWkKpMEU

>>729573041
you're not alone anon, sadly...

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I'm not sure if I'm just imagining it or if the combined force of crippling sadness and heartache are starting to physically hurt

I'll just wait until it gets to the point of killing me

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>>729577944
pls someone screencap this, gotta go soon, so I don't have the time
Btw, how will you call your book, anon ? I'd gladly read it.

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anyone else just so fucking angry?
so much fucking bullshit happening to me and everyday gets me angrier, im starting to hate society with a passion