35 suicidal, any painless methods?

>>729385345
why are you suicidal?

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>>729385345
go get help.

>>729385345
can't see the logo. Colt or M&P?

Are schools closed tomorrow, because of Easter?

>>729385345

This song has some clever ideas:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTXeg-Swq9w

>>729385744
This one's better https://youtu.be/ByC8sRdL-Ro

>>729385519
overweight, no friends, weeb xP

>>729385345
Go to Saudi Arabia, get weapons, kill Saudis, blame china propaganda.

>>729385345
Grow steadily older until dying. Not really painless, I guess, but it is fool-proof.

>>729385345
if you are going to commit suicide, can you at least to the world a favor and kill some niggers?

>>729385937
I don't know if that's you in the picture, but you don't look that overweight to me. You look like a completely normal decent guy. Start working on your confidence man.

best: open sling hanging
okay: car exhaust fumes
bad: gun
killitwithfire: jumping down somewhere

It won't be worth it

>>729385345
Wood chipper.

>>729386185

I second this, please OP

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How the fuck did you manage to get a gun if you're suicidal?

>>729385345
Helium

>>729385937
So in other words; all of the problems you have, are entirely optional...you made the choice to be a weeb by being overly excessive with anime, you are making the choice to be overweight by eating too much you greedy fuck, and you are also making the choice to have no friends, due to the fact they all think you're some victim complex, whiny little bitch that claims to be suicidal and is always feeling sorry for yourself. I have no sympathy for someone like you, you have the ability to change your circumstances, yet you'd rather come to /b and play the 'why me?' card to a bunch of strangers, as if you're life is that fucking difficult. Most painless way to kill yourself would be bullet to the head or jumping in front of a moving train.

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>>729385345
Shoot yourself shock will make it painless. And its very quick so you cant save yourself. Chance of failure is low.

If picture is not you overdose off heroin i tried that and i didnt even know i was dying regrettably my friends saved me so my advice is to do it alone 15 bags aka a jab is 50$ that will kill a newbie but your overweight so you should get 30bags.

I stopped trying to commit suicide because i didnt see a afterlife the several attempts i made. I have very little fear now so i do what i want i make porn, talk to girls i used to get social anxiety from cuz i feared humiliation most of the time i get laid because most men are pussy i live in a large city too and im not that good looking but i get a crazy amount of pussy.

>>729385345

That gun would be pretty quick and painless.

>>729386520

Don't tell anyone.

>>729386520
"before I sell you this gun, are you suicidal?"

"No."

"Ok, here ya go."

>>729385345
fuck off James Corden you're not funny you fat fuck

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>>729385345
your face reminds me of this feggit

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>>729385345
>>729387074

Where are you from?

shoot self back of head band its done cant survive BUT OP IS A FAG AND WILL NOT O IT HE AINT GOT THE BALLS

>>729386588

>I don't agree with your life philosophy
>I am going to try and hurt your feelings with my words

Bruh..

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>>729385345
I hear death by a thousand cuts is a pretty good way to go

>>729388518
Oh and I should say that if you're serious, jesus christ man chill out you seem like an ok guy. Probably should have posted that first

>>729385345
you're literally holding a gun. use it.

Shoot yourself in the kneecaps while you snort Bacardi 151

>>729385345
>Rub your face with brown or black shoe polish.
>Find an available cop in the U.S.
>Wave your cell phone at him.
>Prophet.

>>729386178
>it is fool-proof

The silver swan, who living had no note,
When death approached, unlocked her silent throat;
Leaning her breast against the reedy shore,
Thus sung her first and last, and sung no more:
“Farewell, all joys; Oh death, come close mine eyes;
More geese than swans now live, more fools than wise.”

–"The Silver Swan", Orlando Gibbons
https://youtu.be/6JfG1DMtlDI
.

>>729385345

No Painless way.

There is probably someone somewhere who cares at least a bit about you. So your suicide will make them feel pain.

Even if there is nobody, someone will have to find your corpse or, if you manage to vanish completely will have to search for you, maybe for years.

If you are really depressed get some help. It may not work out immediately, but a close member of my family with severe depression got therapy and found the right medication a few months ago and is now entirely happy.

If medication doesn't work after a few weeks, try another. It even may make a difference if the same stuff is taken as a pill or as drops for example, as in my family members case.

If you don't feel to be a "medical case", just leave. Go away, not from life, but from your location and the people around you. Travel far away. This way you will get to know if there is something that you want to keep in touch with. And possibly find something or someone that its worth living for.

It doesn't matter if you have no money or whatever. You don't have to fear anything now, because you can't loose more than your life, if you hate the rest of the world even more, you can still kill yourself.

Gov guy here. Death is never easy and never painless. Every cell of your being will resist death and you will suffer tremendously for it. Don't believe what you see or read

If your going to suicide do it in pain and hope you be die.

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>>729385345
Fixed, now you're not suicidal anymore.

>>729385345
And bro I'm straight but your an okay looking dude. Commit yourself to lose some weight and buy some nice clothes. After that carry yourself as an alpha and duck what other people think. Why should you give a shit? You do what I said anon and you fucking be you

>>729385702
That's a Sig 556.

>>729385937
lmfao kys nigger

>>729389660
Holy shit thanks anon!

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>>729389660

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OP trolling, baiting a bunch of caring folk while jerking off behind his computer thinking..gottem.

>>729389698
funny that some people like you base the right to live on how someone looks

>>729385345
>35 suicidal, any painless methods?
Ehm.. u sure u wanna kill yourself?

>>729389733
Nevermind, I'm smoking crack.

Dude just go work out get big. go to the club pick some bitches up. do drugs, alcohol you will be fine.in fact just go out like every Friday, if you dont have friends to go out with make some. just talk to people.

Charcoal burning/Helium tank are both relatively painless. Good luck op.

>>729385345
amazing how they sell fucking assault rifles to anyone even a depressed weeb like you in America.

>>729390927
"assault rifles"