Ok /b/ so it has been an ongoing debate between friends and I

You'd probably have better luck with a grizzly it seems more sluggish than a gorilla imo

>>727894254
>>727894447
quick clarification.. meant to add that you also have a spear in hand

I'd rather fight a bear - bears are more predictable, a gorilla is like a nigger on steroids.

>>727894568
still the Grizzly
>>727894585
Truth

Bear, you could atleast try and defend youself. Gorillas can tear you appart, and are smart enough to rip your dick off.

>>727894254
Id fight the grizzly.
Not because It's weaker or anything.
U will lose both fights for sure, but the Gorilla just seems much more brutal and the bear would be finishing u faster, while the fuckin monkey will break ur bones and make it extremely painfull.
Thats what im expecting at least.

>>727894254
On land, grizzly
In water, gorilla
Up in the air free-falling, grizzly

>>727894959
you have a point. I think you would just have a better chance of surviving by fighting the gorilla. especially with a spear. you will lose either way but i believe your chance of survival is greater fighting the gorilla than bear.
also, this fight is in the wild. not in an arena if that changes any opinions

>>727895306
Still the grizzly.
If survive against the Gorilla id lie in the wild crippled and I rly dont want that.
Prefer becoming a grizzly snack.

>>727894254
One is an 800 lb predator, the other a 400 lb nigger that lives of jungle welfare. I think it's pretty clear.

>>727895306
Absolutely not. The gorilla is much stronger than the bear and much smarter. Plus the gorilla strategy would be to break your jaw and then rip off your genitals. The gorilla is very strong and can think. It has a plan. He also has thumbs than can grab you and never let go.
I witnessed a gorilla pull his tire swing off the ceiling of his cage. It was hanging from the chain, and he snapped it like it was string.

>>727896162
This is my post, and I agree with it

>>727894585
Lost

Bear may weigh more, but a gorilla is a lot stronger and can bite about 100lb harder. Bear all the way, just stab it in the heart or something when it stands up to you.

>>727894959
This is officially a "Which would kill you quicker" thread.

>>727896842
this.
They've gotten slightly off track here. lol

>>727894254
From my perspective:
Bear got stumpy limbs, sharp clause and a thousand pounds of tear, but none versatile stump limbs.
Silverback has opposability. He SWINGS. He doesnt need 1000 pounds because he cam hammer pound your face to mush. No need for claws when you can rip peoples limbs off.
So from a purely evolutionary standpoint, Silverback by a mile.

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>>727894254
Your best chance is against the gorilla. Gorillas hate getting hurt and they easily become very skittish. It's 99% just intimidation for them but they really hate fighting

Grizzlies on the other hand are much more aggressive and bad tempered and will start eating you while you're still alive and begging it to stop

>>727895635
My sides have left the atmosphere kek

>>727894254
Harambe would beat yogi's ass

>>727894254
biologist fag here
The only one who would fight with you would be the grizzly for food. A Gorilla would never fight with a human being. The few populations that still exist in the impenetrable african jungle would notice you before you notice them and try to keep hidden

Your chances against a bear is much higher than a gorilla.

Gorillas have hands they can use to grab you and swing you off trees like swinging a bat, and to slam you on the ground by your arms or legs.

However... for a gorilla to do that, you must seriously piss them off, or act alpha in their territory. But act with respect and no eye contact as much, and they will respect you.

I too am a fan of joe rogan

>>727894254
Well, I don't think you can really kill either of them without a really powerful gun or maybe a grenade.
I'd rather fight a bear, because they cannot climb trees.

>>727897343
you're wrong. Gorillas hate fighting, they hate getting hurt. They're very easy to intimidate which you can't do to a grizzly. You're vastly more likely to survive against a gorilla because there's a good chance it'll flee for its life even before you start fighting

>>727896162
I don't think the gorilla is actually stronger, bears are actually extremely fast and agile as well. The bear is naturally designed to be a killer, they're an apex predator after all; gorrillas are not. I'd rather fight the nigger.

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>>727897470
>bears cannot climb trees

>>727897553
yes, gorillas are vegetarians they actually dont kill at all

>>727897470
>can't climb

nigga they will not only climb that tree but they will meet you at the top before you even get there

>>727897470
Dafuq? Lots of bears can climb trees lol.

>>727897282

this is why biologists aren't logicians and can't do maths

the question isn't "which of these animals would you most likely to dropped in their native environment and see what happens"

the question is "which of these animals would you rather fight"

you are fighting the animal biologist boi

>>727897106
The difference between niggers and superior white males defined.

>>727894254
Grizzly. This guy once rekt a bear with just a pocket knife by dodging it's swings and countering with a few stabs to the face each time. A gorilla would have just grabbed him and thrown him about like a ragdoll

>>727894585
ylyl?

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>>727897813
Yeah because white people never had wars or enslaved niggers?

A gorilla is exponentially scarier than a bear, to anyone with three or more brain cells.

>>727897704
I can answer you confidently: the gorilla! Bears have claws and more power with which they will try to break your skull. This is more power than any living primate possesses. With regard to gorillas, loud calls and threatening gestures are often enough to scare them away

>>727897538

Did you actually read what I said. Especially the part where it says

"However... for a gorilla to do that, you must seriously piss them off, or act alpha in their territory."

Calm your fucking 12 year old tits son.

>>727895635
One is an american 800lb aka power up mega murican and the other is giga nigga 9000.
Are you really that stupid ?

>>727894254

i'd fight the bear too i guess.
the gorilla is smarter and would recognize you as another ape, probably feel threatened by you in a social manner. he'd fuck you up. the bear is just a stupid strong animal.

>>727898074
lmao anyone with the normal amount of braincells would know that gorillas aren't killers. They're vegetarian, they hate fighting and getting hurt and are very easy to scare. Grizzlies can get very aggressive and will eat you.

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>>727895306

do you want to survive tho? I mean, this is what a survivor from a domestic chimp attack looks like. So just imagine a gorilla
im with >>727894959
just pick the bear and hope it kills you fast

>>727894585
Correction, niggers are like gorillas on steroids

They're both insanely strong.
Both can and will kill you in seconds if they feel like it.
Fight either, you lose every time.
So, doesn't matter.
Thread, basically.

>>727898272
So you'd rather fight an aggressive apex predator bear rather than a skittish vegetarian gorilla. hmm really made me think

>>727897106
They only eat fish tho.

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>>727895635
that goddamn jungle welfare man , giving out free shit like trees and food, when will it end?

Either way with a Grizzly or Gorilla you gotta assume youre gonna die, and i think id rather not be eaten alive, common grizzly attacks involve them eating multiple parts and you just gotta hope they kill you first, from what ive seen in bear attacks they commonlyput their weight on the person/animal and try to rip the face off, no ty

>>727898424
bad example. She has tried to have sex with the monkey and did not fight with him. That is a huge difference!

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Fun fact: Grizzly bears will eat you while your still alive.

>>727898489
>skittish vegetarian ape

First of all, gorillas are not vegetarian. Gorillas will kill you for fun and spit on your face for a lil bit of fame, i'd rather fight a sluggish fat killer who i could impale with a spear if i hit right than a massive nigger who is in front of me in 1 sec *nothing personel kid*ing me before i can say "i'd rather fight the bear"

>>727898018
How's your reading comprehension these days?

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What would you rather have dropped on your head? a ton of rocks or a ton of bricks?

>>727894254
I don't think you niggers realize just how big grizzlies are. They stand 10 ft tall. 10 ft. They weight 600 lbs. Silver backs are about 5'6 at around 350 lbs. Their about half the size. They eat bamboo and insects. Grizzlies grab fish with their sharp teeth claws. Grizzlies have a thick hide with dense fur over a layer of thick fat, they need it to survive but it basically makes them an armored tank. When grizzlies fight they rear up on their hind legs and claw the ever loving fuck out of their opponents before taking them to the ground with their massive size and chew on their throats with their incredible bite strength, sinking their huge teeth into the soft flesh of their opponent. Gorillas when they fight swing their large forearms and hit their opponent, normally fleeing if the first few blows don't drop whatever they're hitting. Gorillas are big and scary but grizzly bears are simply gigantic mother fuckers that are made to eat weaker animals like gorillas.

>>727894254
Brr
>>727898803
Rox

1v1 Gorilla or Bear with a spear?

Definitely the Bear for me. Gorilla has hands and is like 10x stronger than a human

>>727898771
Dont compare Gorillas to niggers, thats an insult to their intelligence.

>>727898938

Bears are mostly fat.

Gorilla is mostly Muscle.

With the ability to anally rape you if they so desire, but more likely piledriver you into ground, or throw you in the air like a fucking exocet missile.

>>727898938
It doesn't matter, jesus christ lol. They'd tear any human apart if they want.

>>727898803
ton of feathers

>>727898771
You've never seen a bear chase down a deer have you? Those fuckers can outrun Olympic sprinters. Apes lumber around like slow docile idiots.

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>>727898595
why tho

>>727898651
>>727898587
see:>>727898544

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Who would win in a fight?

Bear, or Gorilla?

>>727899085
>>727899104
Bears are mostly fat? The fuck are you reading? Bears are hulking beasts. Apes are mostly fat shits with a lot of intestines to help with their mostly vegetarian diets.

>>727899177
Why are you bringing running into this lmao. This is a 1v1 fight. No running no nothing. The average human isn't an Olympic sprinter. Even if you were to run, both would catch you easily.

>>727899297

of course it is fat you fucking retard, how else do they survive while hibernating.

Fuck you kids need to go to school more.

>>727899302
Maybe you should read the comment I was replying to newfriend.

>>727899297
I dunno why you quoted me, I didn't say shit about fat. I just said either would destroy you.

This whole thread is a convo on which is stronger. Nobody seems to realize it's pointless whichever you fight.

>>727899429
600lbs, even if half of that is fat, they still have more muscle mass than the beer gut laden gorilla.

>>727899498
>both talking about speed
So you're both off topic? Thanks for the clarification, new friend.

>>727894254
I'll fight both of those fuckers at same time

>>727899297
a bear would kill 10 fucking gorillas you fucking idiot. Bears are hyper aggressive killers while Gorillas absolutely fear getting hurt and don't fight. All the chest beating etc is for intimidation they actually don't fight much at all.

>>727899248
its the easiest to obtain for them so yeah but you seriously don't think they don'teat other animals? Wolves, pets, moose, deer, and sometimes people, hunger doesn't give a fuck, especially if its an easy meal.

>>727894254
a better question is which would win in a fight a Gorilla or Grizzly Bear I say Gorilla

>>727899713
I was the person talking bout speed. You reacted with a comment bout speed.
THE PERSON who said "why are you bringing up speed" was a different person.
Seriously, how stupid can aperson be if you'd think someone would bring up speed and ask why the person he is talking to brings up speed

yer fucked either way

>>727899713
You live off autism bux don't you?

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>>727894254
A bear is mostly just hair.
Here is a picture of a bear without hair, not so scary is it?
A gorilla is strong and can build stuff, not fancy stuff but they have been known to use sharpened sticks as a spear to fight of bengal tigers.

So yeah, gorilla is the best animals.

>>727899791
Glad we agree.

>>727900004
That's a fucking sun bear you dense mother fucker.

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>>727894254
let´s find out by letting both fight against each other and study their combative abilities

>>727900014
woops i linked the wrong cunt,

holy shit I've read some retarded shit in here. one guy even said bears dont climb trees

>>727900108
A bear could kill 10 gorillas

You could possibly beat the bear if you have a pointy stick. Gorilla could counter it, though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9eLQf2gK5yo
If lion beats bear and gorilla beats lion then gorilla beats bear.

>>727900263
I vote the 'bears don't climb trees' guy for retard of the week. I know it's early but I think he can hold that title.

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>>727899949

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>>727900004

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWet783dh3g

This part in Condemned 2 made me really fucking afraid of bears for years.

>>727900336
did you learn how bears and gorillas fight from playing Skyrim?

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>>727899588

Kid you are an ignorant faggot who has no clue.

Learn shit before opening your mouth, that way you won't look as fucking dumb.

Even the mentally handicapped kids have more common sense than you.

No doubt you will try to get out the hole you dug for yourself with another non-scientifically approved post or one with facts, with some weird claim that you are right, when you know yourself you are wrong.

"But anon I forgot that Bears hibernate and when they awake they eat 90lbs of food a day to fatten up for the next winter."

But you would never say that, because you are uneducated.

Prove me wrong with facts, and a link to them that a bear has a large amount of muscles and they can use that.

First you claim they have hardly any fat, now you claim they are 50% fat.

600lbs is small for a bear, they can go up to 1400lbs.

>>727900398
Not a Grizzly bear, look at paws

>>727900462
Closely followed by the anon, who said bears are mostly fat! Or was it the same?

>>727900611
A gorilla has the intelligence to understand that it's a stick and not part of your body.

>>727894254

It's about which one has eyes easier to reach and gouge
So probably the grizzly. But I'd kick the gorilla's ass as well.

I think it was in Belarus they are using trained bears to protect farms against wolves.
So, I don't really see what a gorilla could do if a pack of wolves have no chance.

>>727900823
So do bears, bears are smart and are very good problem solvers

Gorillas are not violent animals, they're actually very shy and have a huge fear for getting hurt. They're famous for chest beating and other intimidation tactics but they rarely fight. Without a doubt it would be safer to fight a gorilla. There's a good chance that a few jabs with the stick it will run for its life. They generally flee just at the sight of humans

>>727900736
It's /b, I'm sure it was two retards vying for supremacy.

>>727900736

I didn't say anything about climbing trees since most bears need berries and nuts to live on along with Fish etc.

However they are mostly fat, and since they hibernate for close to 6 months at a time, they need huge amounts of it.

When they wake they are in a weakened state 300-500lbs in weight, they instantly eat and continue to do so, until they reach an avg 1400lbs for the next winter.

Without that fat they would die during hibernation.

But no doubt you are the guy I have been talking to, who went from hardly any fat to 50% fat, showing clearly no knowledge at all.

But again, I invite people to show how much fat is actually on a Bear, via facts.

>>727894585
lost

>>727901142
/thread

Aren't bears like, unkillable?

>>727901184
It's irrelevant, grizzlies are still extremely strong animals and will not have an issue killing a gorilla

>>727901307
There's been cases of people killing them with hand weapons, like axes. They got lucky

>>727897106
dude spear knife sword the gorilla wil grab your hand and tear your arm of and then start and using it as a bat to slap the shit out of you harder then mommy ever did. then probably tear of some other things before you die a agonising death.

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Case closed

>>727899256
Definitely godzilla. He's infinitely more massive and would absolutely fuck the bear up, accidentally.

>>727895306
>better chance of surviving by fighting the gorilla
This. The gorilla don't want to eat you, the bear does.

Bears eat 80% berries just sayin

>>727894254
They would both completely wreck your shit.

Case closed.

I'd fight the gorilla, because it would not eat my face when I try to poke it's eyes out. It may break all my bones, but I'll poke those niggereyes hard af

>>727901819
1400lbs bear, 80% berries.
Still leaves 280lbs of human to eat. Maybe not enough for average 4chan user but for normal person maybe even two of them.

>>727894254
It's not even a debate. I would NEVER want to fight a fucking silverback. A bear I would have a small chance of living. A silverback that actually engaged me in fighting, I would lose that battle 10/10.

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>>727896162
>Muh thumbs
Bitch please. Who needs thumbs when you have fucking knives instead of nails

>>727899177
a domestic cat can outrun bolt

>>727894254
bears are designated killing machines, gorillas are not

>>727897098
>rip peoples limbs off
Bears tear deer and moose to pieces though

>>727901906
Shhhh, this is not the place for logic and reason.

>>727902172
Depends on the distance, a human can outrun a horse if the distance is far enough.

if either were rarin' for a fight you're as good as dead
humans are liitle pussybitchcucks

>>727898544
Where the hell did you read that? Bears are scavengers and hunters. They eat dead shit and will eat whatever they can catch. Including humans.

>>727898232
That's because gorillas are intelligent enough to recognize humans as a top predator, "probably hiding a boom-stick under his fake fur" it may think to itself as it hears you crashing through its jungle.

This make believe scenario assumes two determined attackers facing off, though, like they usually, do so their natural behavior is irrelevant as was loosely pointed out before.

>>727894254
Pointless question, you're dead either way.

>>727901125
What if the gorilla feels forced to fight?
As in like if it felt that you were a threat to its group.

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>>727897470

Depends if it is a woman gorilla or not.
It is the women in the gorilla herd that does the fighting and the hunting. The men gorillas just chill and eat and are treated like kings.

>>727902326
Wow... that might be the most idiotic thing I've read in 2017. Kudos.

>>727902553
no that's lions

>>727901125
I think you fail to fathom what the thread is about.

Fight scenarios assume determined attackers. As in, the fight is on. We know most shit wouldn't even look at each other, which is boring in VS, so the first assumption is they are actively attacking. It's no fun to talk about ambushes and shit, this is a faceoff.

On a side note, for the uneducated.

Chimpanzees are cannibals.

>>727902639
I watched a lot of gorilla things when they had gorilla week on discovery. I might not be an expert but I know more about them than most people.

>>727902553
>silverback
>wonders if it's a woman

Yeah they aren't fucked up like some humans. They don't have trans gorillas

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>>727899923
That is because you are mentally handicapped

>>727902755
discovery doesn't have a gorilla week

https://youtu.be/MKkZawWUqTQ


I got chills

>>727902924
animal planet then or whatever, one of those animal channels.

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>>727902755
> gorilla week on discovery

what nobody has brought up yet is, it would be best to avoid angering them altogether.
gorillas and bears are both total bros as long as you keep calm, give them food, and don't piss them off.

>>727901748
Aw :)

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>>727903270
You like stuff like that huh?
How about a taste of this one!

>>727903215
with bears all that goes out the window as soon as they're hungry

Who says i can't tame the animal that i don't fight? Tame Gorilla, fight grizzly.

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>>727894254
well, when you fight a Grizz with a spear you can wait for it to rear up and set the spear under the bear so when it comes down it..the Gorilla isnt a meat eating predator so it will not be as aggressive, i have to say i would fight the Grizz cause i want to impress the other mt.men..

>>727903455
>>727901748
now that be have some bear friends, someone post some videos of gorilla friends

>>727894959
Have you seen The Revenant?

>>727903678
Such a thing does not exist

>>727894254
Well it depends OP... Are you feeling lucky?

The bear with a spear you probably don´t stand a chance 900 LB, a single attack from his claws will kill you and probably break bones

Against a bear you don´t stand a lot of chance, I mean you can try to scare him but that is it


a Gorilla in other hand, can be seriously hurt with a spear... All his organs are in display to hit. But a fight with him you probably take longer

None of his attacks can insta kill you, this fucker will make you suffer and fight for your life, and even so, your odds are not very high

He is smarter you probably have one chance before this fucker takes the spear out of your hand

If the spear is long enough You might have a better chance btw

>>727900955
The eyes of a grizzly that's standing up (which it definitely will while it's trying to maul you down with claws longer than your face) are 10 feet up. Good luck with that.

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>>727902810

>>727904073
What the fuck has us with a spear got to do with it?

>>727904073
>>727904303
Op Said we are fighting with a spear faggot

>>727904073
What?
Ok, listen kid, when a bear attacks it stands on its legs and kind of falls on you.
All you do is lie down on your back with the spear pointed up and the bear will kill itself on it.
It is how native americans hunted bears for centuries.

Against a gorilla that has arms and hands and can grab the spear and even use it against you, you are better of trying to keep distance and kill it by trying to hit it with a big rock or something.

>>727894254
Gorilla, bears are predators and can kill your very quickly with their natural weapons, gorillas are strong but they are more evolved and don't need brute force to reach their goals, all in all both would kill you but a gorilla would take more time to do it...

>>727904361
Oh my bad.

The gorilla would just grab the spear and Chuck it out of your hand as quick as that. Then he'd been you over pull your arms up cum inside you rip your arms off.

A bear would do the exact same. Except instead of ripping your arms of he would slash your back open with his claws and shatter your back and spine.

>>727904073
>>727904399

>This guy thinks this is fucking movies

Bears usually just bite your leg or thrown some punches in your legs or arms... With his size, he barely need to touch you to you fall

Native Americans usually not fought bears alone, and most of the tales are probably just tales

>>727899220
moar?

>>727898803
A ton of rocks because it would weight less

>>727900004
That's a black bear not a grizzly, the grizz are way bigger. I've seen a grizzly CUB tear apart a stump faster than I could with an axe. I've seen both in person and would fight the gorilla every day and twice on Sunday

>>727894254
In other words you just listened to the Joe Rogan podcast.

>>727901768
>definitely gozilla
Wit?

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>>727905535
bait?

>>727905698
This

>>727905334
Except there is video fotage of it.
It was a rite of passing when young indians became men. They had to go out and kill a grizzly bear with just a spear and some courage.

You literally could not hurt either one of them, but at least the gorilla weighs like 1/4 the weight of a bear. Good luck against a bear lmao

>>727896693
>when it stands up to you

lmao get a look at this retard, he thinks movies are an accurate portrayal of reality.

>>727904399
rofl found the 12 year old

>>727907091
Oh yeah, did you look in the mirror?

>>727906126
This is fucking retard tier

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>>727904399
>when a bear attacks it stands on its legs and kind of falls on you

Yeah okay

>>727906126

Video footage... from the 19th Century

>>727907240
kys you fucking faggot holy fuck that was lame

>>727908032
Oh yeah, because there are no indians today right?
I wonder who owns all of them INDIAN CASINOS?!

>>727908242
Takes one to know one.

>>727906126
you are a genuine 100% retard

>>727908288
i know u r u said u r so what am i!?!?

>>727894254
I'm fucked either way
I'd choose the bear. Gorillas can go dipshit which is terrifiying. Bears somehow still look cute when they tryin to kill you.

>>727908246

Except grizzly's are a threatened species and is not allowed to be hunted, except for 4 states, none of which is Indian territory.

So get wreck'd Ralph.

>>727908539
They can do pretty much whatever they want because of white guilt.

>>727894585
Fucking lost

>>727894585
ROFL

>>727905535
OMG YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT! IT'S A TON SO THEY WEIGHT THE FUCKING SAME! I FEEL LIKE THE ONLY SMART PERSON ON THIS WHOLE FRICKING WEBSITE

>>727909601
(Babby's first trolling steps)
That's adorable.

>>727909847
Fucking hell you guys are so annoying. I fucking hate you all. Go die

>>727900108
I dreamed of starting a website like this. a sort of underground animal fighting thing. instead of dog fights n chicken fights we'd put a rhino up against a hippo, make a tiger fight a Kodiak, a lion fighting a pack of pitbulls... n so on it could be like a redroom but for animals

>>727909601

Bricks would do less damage, as they are wider and would spread the impact damage over a larger area lessening it.

Hence why when you fall back if you have your arms out you spread impact damage making it less painful.

Hence why wrestlers in your shitty WWE do it.

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Probably a gorilla as I would get knocked out into a painless death. That fucker probably squats my family.

The grizzle would eat your head while you are alive.


Either way, you're fucked.

>>727910957
Looks like he skipped leg day.

>>727911278
Legs are useless for fighting but good for running away. The gorilla never needs to run and only need offensive powers so they get really big arms instead.

>>727911423
>Legs are useless for fighting
ahahahaha
even if you are untrained in leg combat, you can always try to kick your foe in the gonards

>>727894254
i would go for the grizzly, apparently your body goes in to some sort of shock when they start chewing on your skull.

fucking nigger would just bludgeon you to death and is way more maneuverable then the bear which is the only advantage you have with large animal fighting.

>>727898018
Did you know that niggers enslaved more niggers in american then whites enslaved niggers.
it was the jews transporting and trading them all btw. then there is the whole slave trading from africa after the used the combined negroid arab armies to kill the roman empire and the great indian empire later between 1000 and 1500.

>muh 150 years of slavery. gtfo

Gorilla because they don't eat you.

Bear will kill you and eat you but I could just roll over and submit to the Gorilla maybe he would spare my life.

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>>727894254

>>727898938
>bears are simply gigantic mother fuckers that are made to eat weaker animals like gorillas.
Then why dont we see bears running around in africa eating gorillas?

>>727894254
A GRIZZLY CAN RUN 40MPH = FASTER THAN RACE HORSE. NOT SLUGGISH

>>727912476
FAGGOT

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Behold how this small bear cub handily defeats a full grown dog. If you scale this beast up to a full grown adult, my money is on the bear.

>>727897581
actually only cubs can climb trees, an adult bear would snap all but the thickest trees when it got up high enough. same thing for the gorilla tho, just to a lesser extent

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Bears are weak. Exhibit A.

>>727899085
Gorillas actually have tiny little cocks proportionate to their body size. Like little pee pees, smaller than an Indian guy would have.

>>727900004
>not so scary is it?

dude that thing looks fucking horrifying

>>727901997
what fucking grizzly bear weighs 1400lb? the average is 600, of course htere will be outliers where some jacked grizzly nigger gets to like 900lb, but not fucking 2.33 times the average

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>>727902755
>watches gorilla week

I'd start by slowly finger-banging the hyena.

>>727894959
THIS!

>>727909990
Public school, eh? The last federally forced merger was in Pittsburgh. Besides me federally force-destroying your mom's ass last weekend.

>>727910049
id patreon fund that

>>727900462
Nah
I was just in a thread where being born In 91 meant you were 16

Bears would just club a motherfucker in their head with their giant ass paws, almost insta killing them. Back in the days of the gold rush, they shipped in large cats (like lions) and would make them battle. The bears never lost because they would end up completely crushing the Lions skulls in a single swing.

>>727902755
no you watched the 2017 election

Most of these comments are pretty funny, intended or not. Thanks for the laugh.
I'd take the bear, only because it is lower on the evolutionary tree than the gorilla. Both are probably fast and dangerous, with strong bites and very deadly large hands/claws. Even if the gorilla eats mostly plants, it's still got more muscle than the strongest human on earth, arguing that the bear is stronger is arbitrary to the fact that you can't best either physically, no matter how hard you tried. This doesn't make your spear obsolete, since weaponry and technology are the true assets we humans possess.
Now, since we have a spear our best chance is to simply poke him with our pointy stick from a distance, or if we're /fit/, throw the spear and go for the 1HKO to the heart, head, or just get lucky and cripple it to the point where we can outrun it while it bleeds out. Since I am not /fit/, I employ the "poke it from the distance" tactic against either. Go for the head and sensory organs, maybe even the neck on the gorilla. Note that it's a poke, not a driving ram. If you get lucky, it COULD work of the bear, but I think the gorilla would just pull out the spear, break it, and then proceed to turn you into mush. Assuming this pan fails, I'd employ a sambo-style grappling technique on the bear, effectively hanging onto the stomach upside down and then getting out from underneath him while he's confused. It might not work, but I'd certainly try it if my life depended on it. Gorilla, with his developed limbs would simply peel me off of him and proceed do beat my brains out.

>>727920278
Stephen Fry? Is that you?

>>727921593
"It COULD work" referring to the driving ram technique with the spear.

>>727894254
I'd rather fight the bear because the gorilla has hands so if it gets hold of a weapon you're pretty much fucked

>>727914398
Then how the fuck do they get honey?

>>727897227
Yogi is a brown bear.
Think a grizzly but like half the size.

Grizzlys are like 9 feet tall, and have arms that can chop down trees.

>>727895635
That's a special comment 10/10

>>727914398
No dude. Grizzley bears have thick hingled hind claws FOR climbing.

Those fuckers don't climb trees like trees.
They climb trees like poor people climb telephone poles in search of free cable.

>>727914792
Black bear.
It's like compairing a chuwawa to a fucking werewolf.

Americans have literally hunted black bears so much that they have an instinctual fear of us.

Grizzlys can claw through steel.

>>727910049
Fucking Hippo would WRECK a rhino.

>>727894585
lost

>>727894254
A grizzly is one of the most dangerous land predators on earth and fucking huge. A silverback is a fucking chump, comparatively.

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>>727898544
nigga u stupid

Hang the fuck on tarzan fought that fucking mega nigger gorilla and got out with barely a scratch, although in fairness if i was trying to fuck margot robbie id take the chance too

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>>727905535

>>727897470
lol do you think its fucking winnie pooh? Real bears can climb easily and on top of that they run faster than humans so they will fucking chop off your leg before you can climb half the tree

>>727923071
this nigga...
rhino would pound the hippo to the ground

>>727906126
You're so fucking stupid it hurts.

>>727910265
Nah man, disagree. Bricks got corners.

Really it just depends on HOW it comes down. Like a stream? Or all at once?

Like a stream:
I'd pick rocks because their are smaller ones which are going to hurt but are likley to bounce off instead of pile up and you can focus on blocking or dodging the big ones. (I'm assuming your in like a 5×5x15 hole with them dumping them on you)

On the other hand bricks have corners and are consistent in weight. Sire the wight gets spread out but if a corner hits you dead on you're FUCKED. Shit would break whatever it hit.

All at once:
Depends.
Are they in a loose pile or grouped up? If the bricks are all stacked up in a cube id go bricks all the way because it wouldn't be hard to dodge the death lump, just got to worry about the splash.
On the other hand, if everything is loosely piled id choose rocks because the rocks would spread out into a painful, but survivable, volley.

Tl;dr
All at once: piled: Rocks
All at once: Stacked: Bricks.
Poured: Rocks

>>727910049
I dont even know a website where i can see dog fights. If someone could actually tell me, i would be glad. But something like that would be fucking nice, illegal tho.

If this gets 3 replies for interest ill ask my.biology teach rn

>>727923751
Nigga they ARE THE SAME SIZE.

The rhino has a fucking horn.

The hippo is a fucking truck sized Alligator on steroid infused bathsalts.

>>727914792
Black bears are easily skittish. Charging them is your best bet when dealing with them. Brown bears are the scary ones, but thankfully they're likely to only attack in defense of them, their cubs, food, etc. Playing dead can work with them.

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>>727924165
My nigga, something similar to this would happen. Hippo opens his fucking mouth, rhino sticks his horn on his mouth and it's over.

>>727924784
Nigga I ain't gonna lie that picture is funny as fuck, but the hippos brain is WAY back twords it's eyes. Shit would just chomp down and take it's whole fucking head off anyways.

Face it, rhinos aren't good for shit but being ground up into chinese love-you-long-time liquors.

>>727914340
holy shit that hip toss

>>727921593
>it's an 'anon clings to the bear's underbelly' day

>>727914340
Fucking bear wrestles better than half my olympic team did

>>727925123
True. But Rhino skin is harder than Hippo's, can his teeth really pierce through it? I dont think so. Time to rethink life my nigga

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>>727894254
Gorillas can be distracted quite easily into trying to throw a ball through a hoop and would therefore be easy to defeat.

>>727925665
Bruh a hippo has THE STRONGEST bite of ALL animals. Shit can fuck up the frame of miltary vehicles

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>>727921593
> I'd employ a sambo-style grappling technique on the bear
>hanging onto the stomach upside down
>getting out from underneath him while he's confused

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>>727925846

>>727925846
I get it fam, you a hippo lover and Im a rhino lover. I ain't backing down either, i stay loyal to my niggas till I die and i can see you are similar to me and I can respect you for that.

>>727926423
Lets make em fuck so we can get a Rhinippo.

Big ass mouth AND a big ass horn. Shit can swim AND rush.

Sink boat eith it horn, devour hoes with it's maw.

>>727898595
who told you that? my buddy knew travis personally and told me he knew for a fact he was on mood stabilizers, that shit caused it

>>727894254
the bear, it would at least kill me quickly, if it had any inclination to fight at all. it would simply kill me as it saw me as a threat.

A gorilla would be more likely to see me as a competitor, so would throw me around and break me in half to show dominance, at which point it might kill me if im lucky, else leave me to die slowly

>>727901819
Gorillas eat 100% leaves and shoots

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>>727927000
Trips dont fucking lie. This thing would be a monster.

>>727898455
Wrong, gorilla > nigger
Lrn2biology

What's funny is a Grizzly would fuck up a gorilla's shit but the Grizzly would still be much more manageable for a human to fight for the reasons listed.

>>727896162
A brown bear is much stronger than a gorilla

>>727897098
Does Santa have any Clause

>>727894959

Would kill you quicker? The bear would.. kill you quicker??

Dude. Have you ever seen a grizzly do it's work? That fucker will literally turn you inside out before deciding whether or not it wants to eat you.

I'll take the ape.

>>727928115
Lost. What if we turned the horns and teeth into penises?

>>727894254
Most women in my family think they could have beat up Harambe if their kid was in the pen.

>>727929749
You want to give it a rhinoplasty?

>>727930219
Yes.
Also now that I think about it, if you're a femanon could you seduce the male gorilla and then kill him discreetly like a Chinese female assassin?

>>727930048
take em to the nearest zoo with their kid and test that hypothesis

>>727929749
The sharp teeth and the horns would be erect penises while the not so sharp teeth would be flaccid penises with the possibility of becoming erect, basically he could have a mouth full of hard cocks. Truly a monster.

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>>727894585
Lost

>>727930513
You can do it if youre male too.
You just need to hide within an appropriate prostitute NPC.

>>727894568
The gorilla has the capacity to hold the spear. If it gets a hold of the spear, it will come out of your hands.
The closest the bear can get is to clench it in its jaws, and that makes it partially vulnerable.
That said, there are more deadly encounters with grizzlies than gorillas. I'm not ignoring the differing population proportions, either.
I'm going with the gorilla. Easier to avoid getting hurt.

>>727900322
[citation needed]

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>>727894585
>nigger on steroids

>>727925846
Nile croc has 5k psi bite
Hippo is 1.8k

>>727898074
someone has never seen a bear apparently

>>727899085
those mostly fat bears routinely rip apart moose that are bigger than a car

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OK LISTEN UP

with 24h time for preparation you have to fight one of them (in a forest). which one would you fight?

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>>727894254

Having lived around grizzly bears, I'd take the gorilla.

Why? Certainly not because I'd stand any chance against the gorilla in a fight, but because with a simple $10 purchase of watermelon and fried chicken the gorilla would ignore more long enough to ensure that it's fellow gorillas cap its ass over said bounty.

>>727933672
what do we have at our disposal? only was is in the wilderness, or can we travel to the nearest town and pick up supplies?

>>727931145
Or a dream come true. If you're into that, getting eaten out or sucked off by that could be great. How many femfurries and furfags would get behind that?

>>727934255
you get a knive and a bear grills book

>>727933672

I dont need 24 hours. I need like 10 mins tops.

>walk over to gun safe
>grab shotgun
>grab shell belt with slugs
>grab another box of slugs to be safe
>or grab my nugget and some clips

Fatty bum bum

>>727894585
KEK

>>727935412
what forests have gun safes around?

>>727894254
The grizzly every time. They are basically stupid animals and you could get lucky that if you really hurt them (eye gouge, punching their nose) they might get sufficiently freaked out and back down. If a gorilla decided it wanted you dead, it is not fucking likely to give up or be sidetracked. It's basically as smart as you, at least where fighting is concerned, but it's also stronger and despite its looks more agile.

>>727894254
Always was an always is the brown bear.

>>727924130
DO it

>>727928115
You niggas banter is funny as fuck.
Underrated banter.

>>727922009
Why the fuck would he need a weapon? Kek

I'd just shoot the bear/gorilla if it was a 'equal' fight - they might have strength and claws but we have a better brain that allowed us to create firearms that can take down even the deadliest predator with ease

REDIRECTED DEBATE, WHO WOULD WIN IN A FIGHT IF THEY FOUGHT AGAINST EACHOTHER, GORILLA OR GRIZZLY????

>>727925801
haha the "gorilla is a nigger" joke... again...

>>727894585

they're more like a nigger on steroids, on steroids

>>727936461
Everyone talking about how dumb grizzlies are and how smart gorillas are. You realise that grizzlies are actually incredibly smart, they have the most complex brain relative to their size of any mammal and have exceptional long term memory, able to remember specific people and locations over 20 years. The polar bear, a close relative to grizzlies, has an estimated iq at least equal to the smartest primates. Bears can solve complex problems and are good under pressure from life threatening situations. They are also naturally more agressive than gorillas, and are experts at survival
Tl;dr intelligence isnt really a deciding factor in this matchup

>>727938137
"the most complex brain relative to their size of any mammal"
wtf does this mean? what do you mean complex?

>>727938316
Complexity relates to brain folds, neural links etc...
Relative to their size means a large brain size to body size ratio

>>727927000
>Rhinippo
>not hipponocerous

>>727938565
humans have the largest brains relative to body size, anything past that i'd like a citation

I'm going with the gorilla.
You're likely dead either way.

Have more hope of lethal or debilitating penetration with the first stab at the throat with the gorilla, and that's the only decisive moment you're likely to have.

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>>727939062
Aye, Dolphins are more complex though.

>>727937475
Grizzly

>>727939062
hominids aren't even in the top 5 brain:body ratio you fucking dingus

>>727939312
Our brains are still larger in comparison to body size

Leo survived a bear attack in the revenant, but I have yet to see any movies where someone survives a gorilla attack.