I need a feels thread Post your feels

>>726191818
Im alone tonight trying to lose weight

My mom kicked me out of the house when i was 16 and I had to move into an older friends place and get my ged because i had no way to go to school where he lived she ended up killing our family dogs two of them and our cat. She dissapeared a few months later and i got in contact with my dad and little bro moved to the other side of the country havent seen her since or heard from her

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>>726191818

>>726192447
Holy fuck

I struggle to make any friends because Asperger's syndrome (can't take a joke at all) I'm socially awkward and have anxiety, and on top of that am depressed. I'll probably end my life sooner or later, as I don't see things getting better from here.

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>>726191818
Self loathing is a norm for me

GF broke up with me today, nothing special really, but she's the first person I've ever truly loved so I'm not really taking the breakup well.

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I have a long post, and I'd like it if anyone read it. Maybe you don't have advice for me, and that's OK. It doesn't really matter. I just need someone to acknowledge my feelings.

I'm having a lot of girl problems right now. I feel extremely alone all the time, mostly because I'm still reeling from the end of a 6 year relationship. It's been 2 years, but it still affects me daily. I don't think I will ever get to a place where I am at peace with what happened. It kills me to this day. I need something to make the pain go away.

I'm sort of seeing one girl. We've hung out a few times and made out. It's weird though, she's not good at communication, and I'm really unsure how to handle things. We've never really gone out on a date, and when I texted her to ask if she wanted to go out sometime she never responded. It doesn't help that I have a lot of anxiety, so I'm getting paranoid if I'm doing something wrong. I haven’t messaged her recently, because I feel like I’ve been doing everything and she hasn’t reached out to me.

Cont.

I feel hungry but also tired, and regret that I messed up my sleep cycle just as I was getting it on track.

>>726193034
This sounds exactly like the relationship I was just in before my gf broke up with me today. I know how you feel bro.. the anxiety, the paranoia of maybe doing something wrong... I just went through that shit man.

>>726193034
I know how you feel anon i cant really tell you what to do. but i can tell you what not to do
>don't try to shut off your emotions from the world
>Dont resist change
>dont try to fix something you cant fix

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>>726193034

I've also been getting involved with a married woman my age. I've known her for a bit, we get along pretty well. The past few times I've seen her there's been some definite sexual tension. We've made out before, but it was a night we were both drinking. Twice this past week when we hung out we ended up holding hands, and talking about our issues with anxiety and BPD. I don't talk about that with anyone, and finding out that she deals with the same stuff was a huge turn on. It's so comforting knowing that she understands what I deal with. She said that she wanted to get lunch sometime and talk about it, but I haven't reached out to her about when that's going to happen. I don't want to overstep my bounds, but from what I have gathered, she's in an open relationship anyway. I know it's fucked up to get involved with someone married, and she's told me that she "knew it wouldn't last" anyway, but I don't care. I need someone. I need someone to hold my hand and tell me I'm not terrible.

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>>726191818

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I have jury duty tomorrow and I haven't been out of the house in over 2 years.

I was molested by my brother on and off from ages 5-13/14. as well as by some neighbor kids, and my step-sister (but I enjoyed that, probably because I was 11 or 12 and was extremely homophobic) no I only masturbate to shota and twink porn, however I only feel a strong attraction to some females. I'm afraid of becoming a danger to my brothers' children.

>>726193417

Cont

The other girl is a longtime friend of mine. We've smoked a lot of weed and done other shit together. We've gotten to know each other really well. She knew me when I was with my ex of 6 years, and she was married at the time. Recently, she was with a guy for a few months and then she got pregnant. She was really excited. Then she miscarried and dumped the guy because he was a leech. I got really worried about her, this past week when I was drunk I messaged her and said that I would do everything I could for her, and if she wanted to move here, I'd take care of her. I'm not sure why I did that. I guess I have feelings for her. In the past, we've talked about stuff that friends shouldn't really talk about, mostly sexual things. She told me once that she could make me cum really hard, and it would be the best I've ever had. It was mostly light-hearted, but I believe when people say things like that it's at least partially serious. I would really like to be with her, and I know she cares deeply about me. But am I just projecting my loneliness onto her? I was stupid to message her the other day saying what I said. She probably got really weirded out. I want to message her again to make sure that she is OK, but I don't feel like I can do it again without seeming needy. I am needy right now, but I don't want to look that way. It's not a good look. No one wants someone who’s needy. I don't even know for sure she's interested, but I want to try it anyway, because I need someone. If I try it though, and she rejects me, how can I expect her to be friends with me? Who wants that shit?

>>726193482
Do you have niceish cloths

Feels:
I'M SO FUCKING SICK OF PEOPLE POSTING /S/ PICS IN /B/ AND NOT /S/ WHERE THEY FUCKING BELONG.

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>>726193570

Last one

Like I said, all of this is coming from this hole in my heart from my long-time ex. I’m still not over it. I’ll never be over it. I need someone. I want to be with someone. I’ve had one relationship since she left, and that girl broke up with me without really giving a reason why. She kept saying I was the perfect boyfriend, but she “had to work on herself”. I have thought about that a lot, and taken it to mean that she just didn’t see herself being with me or that she thought I was still dealing with my long-term ex and not ready for a commitment. Maybe that’s true. I don’t miss my ex, quite the opposite really. I miss being in a committed relationship. I want to give myself entirely to another person. I miss sleeping next to someone every night. I miss holding hands in the grocery story. I want to cuddle after work every day. It was all taken from me. I am desperate for it again. I think that’s why I’m trying to get involved with these other girls. I have to put myself out there, even though it kills me. The anxiety of the unknown is so painful. But there can be no relationship with anyone unless I put my heart on the line. That scares me, and motivates me. It’s a horrible idea to try and get with any of these girls, really. But I don’t know what else to do. I need someone so badly. I am so painfully alone. I am trying not to hurt myself, or kill myself, or anything. I just can't handle being alone anymore.

>>726193417

>I need someone. I need someone to hold my hand and tell me I'm not terrible.

Fuck man this is exactly why I got into >>726193352
this relationship

>>726193570
>>726193417

i acknowledge you. you are not terrible. you sound self-aware enough that therapy might really help you out.

>>726193495

Seek professional help. Talk to a therapist. The only way you're going to stop yourself from doing something to another kid is if you have someone to help you. You're not a bad person if you don't act on those impulses.

Seriously, find someone.

>>726193622
Old clothes from private school

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>>726193922

Been going to therapy. My therapist has helped me get some of these feelings out. I don't feel as suicidal, and I haven't cut in a while, but the pain still lingers. It's not really that it hasn't helped, but there are things that therapy can't fix. It can't fix the need to be with someone. It's going to be there. When I find the right person, I'm probably going to love them with every ounce of my being until I breathe my last. I will probably scare them off because of the intensity before that happens anyway.

>>726193770
you can't force a long-term relationship, they come to you. you need to figure out how to be happy alone first, dude. if you can't love yourself, how're you gonna love somebody else?

>>726194384
why don't you try... not... scaring them off instead

>>726194132
I FEEL EXACTLY LIKE THIS

>>726193495
how old are you

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>>726194411

>you need to figure out how to be happy alone first

I've thought about that for a long time. Many of my close friends have said those words to me since the breakup. I just don't believe it. I can't be happy when there's this pain. I've tried to be happy alone for more than 2 years, and I can't. The only times I've felt really happy was when I with someone. I haven't been completely alone since then. I've had a few one night stands, and other things, and when I've fallen asleep with someone are the only times I've really felt at peace.

Realizing you cant force someone to love you is the hardest thing Ive ever experienced. I try to convince her to love me every day. I beg her to love me. I want to be enough for her, but she invites her friends to come along. She will never love me, and I dont think I can live with that

>>726193034
I don't have advice but I acknowledge you anon

>>726195159
Yea thats what im afraid of that i'll love her but she won't love me back...

>>726194943
19, one of my brother already has kids

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>>726195374

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>>726195426

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>>726195481

I am popular at campus, but everyone forgets about me as soon as the weekend starts. If I am not going out to drink with people, I will barely receive any messages. This is heaven compared to Highschool, I used to sit by myself during lunch every single day, but it still annoys me how I sometimes feel invisble or alienated from my peers.

I can pretend to be tough, I haven't spilled my spaggheti in years but it keeps getting more and more difficult to pretend I am just like them.

I live with my aunt and uncle. My parents and my brother came to visit me this weekend and they left this morning. I woke up and the other half of my bed was empty. My brother was gone. And my parents. And all of their luggage. I didnt get to say goodbye. It was like they were never there to begin with, and my life returned to its typical feeling of loneliness.

So tell me /b/, do you ever look back at something happy and just think to yourself whether it ever even happened?

>>726193023
hey anon I'm going through the same exact thing.

feels fucking awful man.

My girlfriend is leaving me because she's finally taking her childhood rapist to court and she is having a rough time and can't be in a relationship right now. I understand that she needs space, but I don't think she realizes how she's the only thing holding me together, and that without her, I can't function properly. I love her too much to let her go. But now she won't answer me..

>>726195547
I know that feeling. You have friends but you dont have real friends. You are only alone because you always have to invite yourself to parties and you have gotten so tired of it that you think "fine! I can just survive by myself. I dont need them." But in reality you go home every night and wait for your phone to go off, and even though you know nobody will call or text, you jump at every vibrate of your phone, hoping that someone will invite you somewhere. The only reason you have a phone is so that someone might decide to text you. You live every day hearing about other's plans and how great their weekend was and all you want, just one fucking time, is to feel included.

>>726194132
So fucking true.

>>726196082
What a weird reason to leave you.

>>726195547
>spilled my spaggheti

I went to a funeral I was not invited to. It was my grandma's best friend, she's old and can't get out of the house right now so she kindly asked me to go in her place.
Nothing out of the ordinary. As I walked out of church I got stopped by another lady "I used to talk to her a lot in her last days, she'd been struggling with depression..." she keeps going on and on until she drops it. " she asked me 'do you think God would be angry if I killed myself, I've thought about leaving the stove on overnight' and I told her it was wrong"

What kind of God does that to people who follow him? Makes me want to an hero before I get old.

>>726196252
WELL her issue is that she's just going through a really shitty time in life in general and that she needs some space and she wants a break. She promises me she will come back to me, but neither of us know how long it is, and it's really tough on me

It's the first mothers day since my mother passed in may last year. I miss my mum :(

>>726196082
I can relate. My girlfriend left me like 3 hours ago. She doesn't know how fucking dependant I am on her, not just as a partner but as a best friend too.

My best friends dropped me a few months before I met her. Now that she's gone I have absolutely nobody left and I'm back on 4chan for the first time in 5 years. I don't know what to fucking do, I feel lost.

Part of me thinks she'll come back. I feel like she was really upset by the breakup and it wasn't just a "I don't love you anymore lol" thing. I've been dumped by girls who clearly just didn't love me anymore so I didn't care at all.

I hope she comes back. She was the only light in my life when everyone else has brought me nothing but darkness.

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What's happening in this thread?

>>726196715
If she's going through a tough time, why push you away? I would imagine she'd want to do the opposite and have you there for her.

>>726196867
She won't let me help, believe me I've tried.

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>>726196845
Feels.

>>726196755
I fucking love my mom dude. I don't know what I would do without her. I can't imagine losing her and it's going to fucking tear me apart when it happens.

I'm sorry anon, from the bottom of my heart. I hope things start looking up for you and you spend mother's day being with your family and being happy like she would've wanted it. make sure you visit her, too.

I've actually been considering suicide a lot more than a normal human should. The funny part is that I don't have a reason really. It just facsinates me, and I feel like I'd rather off myself then continue going through life recently.

Recently I just haven't been feeling anything. My girlfriend left me, I'm broke as hell, have no friends, have no car, etc. I've just been numb to the world around me and I'm starting to lose faith in it

>>726196916
I wish I could help you man. I don't know much about relationships.

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>>726196923
Oh okay I can do that. Is this good? Nick tells me I'm a good actress

mom is wasting away to liver disease, she's the caring and supportive type, dad passed away when i was 12, even while sick she still helps me when i'm in financial trouble, i'm an uneducated minimum wage faggot and I can't help her even if i wanted to, barely making ends meet for my family, been in a deep depression for more than 2 years now.

>>726195481
source?

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>>726191818
im autistic to talk to her and this is the last year i will see her,this is my third time having a crush on her but fuck it man i keep telling myself to move on which i do but always fail

also im ashamed of my dick size because it is a solid 6 inches if not slightly above if im fully erected and horny

oh well fuck it, hope you guys have a great day wish me luck b

Up late 2 AM cramming for an A&P test again, never can seem to stop procrastinating. I hate all the stress I put on myself but I don't know why I keep doing it. I'm doing it right now, this post is me procrastinating.

>>726196554
>9gag

lost

>>726197179
I don't think I can be helped in this situation anyway, I just have to sit back and let life take the wheel, maybe she'll come around and be ready for help after they sentence the guy. I'm just worried because she's talked suicide a few times, but has never done anything like this, so I really hope she's not planning on doing anything of that matter; I wouldn't know anyway.. she won't answer me. She's not dead yet though, she posts on her Snapchat periodically.

>>726193023
I remembered that happening once, shit is rough the first few weeks or even months. Hope ya feel better dude.

>>726197277
Wow you got it lucky 4 inches here and fat isn't that wonderful huh. I wish I were you

>>726197285
hang in there man, A&P sucks but it is worth it in the end. What are you going for? Nursing? MD? DO?

>>726197285
I got this problem but I'm not as smart as you. Just study and forget about everything else, same way you forget about studying when you procrastinate. I read something like: "make your procrastination work for you" i.e. procrastinate on things that waste your time. "I can watch tv later" or "I can get drunk later" or whatever.

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Story Time
>Be me 15 y/o 10th grade winter break
>Meet up with friend who switched schools in 9th
>qt 3.14 who at the time was the only person I could talk to
>We have been texting and gone on meet ups before
>Go to the mall, see a movie, have a good time
>For once I'm not awkward and enjoy myself
>Feel like a person with her
>Almost 6 hour long date ends, we are waiting for her mom to pick us up
>She goes to touch my hair or something
>I never told anyone but I was molested by my 'friend' in middle and ever since I never let anyone touch me
>Give her the cold shoulder on the car ride back
>Realize the next morning what I've done
>Try to apologize but only come off as Autistic
>Mess up every text after and eventually stop bothering her

I still miss her. I miss the idea of her. A stable person who actually cares about you. I want to fucking hang myself. I torments me everyday.

I'll probably be alone. even after the Navy. fuck the confidence meme

>>726197499
Woah, if she might kill herself you better get involved.

>>726197806
I wish I could get involved, I've tried visiting her house, she won't answer, calling her, she won't answer, text, Snapchat, instagram, facebook, whatever, she won't answer. I don't think she will actually do it. And I doubt that's why she wants to be alone. She hasn't talked suicide for he pst few years and last time she did talk about it she told me that no matter how she gets, she'd never actually do it. I just need to wait for her to come back to me

>>726197642
Eventually nursing. I'm starting off becoming an EMT, I think I'll really enjoy the fast-paced field for awhile. There's a Paramedic-RN bridge that I want to do later on (if I can get myself under control.)

>>726197602
>>726196747

Jesus Christ Lewis musta had some demons.

>>726198183
I may be dumb as fuck but who is Lewis?

>>726198328
C.S. Lewis is an author

>>726198328
The guy who wrote Narnia, those two are quotes of him.

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>>726197671
More context I forgot:
>Get diagnosed with scoliosis
>Diagnosed with Pectus C in 9th
>Parents divorce 9th grade summer
>Live in shitty 2 room cottage behind two old gay german dudes
>Struggling with grades
>Have NO ONE to talk to

Fuck me I should have killed myself a long time ago I am so fucking tired of life

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Anons, I wish I could tell you "Everything will get better, just hang in there!" But that isn't how life works. No one is promised an easy life. Suffering, rejection, pain, sadness, depression, and death are the only things we are ever guaranteed in life. I seem to be surrounded by people who are always so joyful and optimistic, I really don't get them.

>>726198328
C.S. Lewis (the original author of the quotes)

>>726198084
You said she's never behaved this way before?
Is she avoiding everyone or just you?

>>726198396
He was usually a pretty uplifting author (he wrote lots of childrens' books), then when his wife died, his writing became darker. "The Great Divorce" was written after she died, that writing is so different than his previous self.

I think this is the biggest reason why I drink as much as I do and why I get shit sleep

>Be me
>married dude to amazing wife
>Love each other to death, want to have kids but we are having trouble
>finally one day she comes to me after I get off work "anon I'm pregnant!!!"
>we both are super excited
>spend the next several months planning for the baby
>buy cloths toys and shit are garage sales because we aren't rich
>parents surprise us with new crib and baby changing table
>we finish the baby's room and are all set for our baby boy to get here
>at six month ultrasound the tech spends a few minutes scanning and then excuses herself from the room
>ohshit.jpg
>Doctor comes in and scans my wife and then tells us
>"I'm sorry but this is your baby's heart and its not beating. Your baby is dead. I'm so sorry."
>Worse, since she was six months along she had to give birth still
>that night she gave birth to our stillborne baby boy
>I held him in my arms, though he was dead he was still beautiful.
>I balled like a little bitch
>I couldn't stop thinking about all the things I wasn't going to be able to teach him
>all the things he was never going to be able to do
>and all the time I was going to spend with him.
>We cried for hours, all the while holding him....
>I hadn't cried for over a decade before that moment
>I will never forget that night as long as I live.

After that day I slowly began drinking more and more. Now It's almost everyday and it just barely gets me through. I just miss my baby so much.

I just tried to kill myself...really wish I didn't have any living connections to have my imagination guilt me into staying alive

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>>726198462
When does it end? Suicide seems pretty fucking good right now skip to the end fuck your score.

>>726197228
what is wrong with you?
open up motherfucker
or leave ...
this is the onely place I realy feel home, heare are the onely people I can realy relate to
people who mostly dont act som bulshitt up ...

>>726198487
She's just avoiding me.. that's the weird part. I talk to one of her closest friends periodically and have her check in on her for me, make sure she's alright, but she's never just avoided me out of no where because she knows how bad it fucks me up mentally.

My life is pretty shitty on its own, and she is the only normal person I know that cares about me that isn't family. She's the person I go to when I need to rant or just cry. Because she understands and she'll still love me. But without her I'm stuck to myself and I have horrible depression (that I just avoid getting medication for) and I don't know how to deal with my life without her.

I think she's just avoiding me because there enough sadness in her life and she just doesn't want to include mine right now. Which I totally get, but I want to at least help her.

>>726198462
Optimism is seeing the now, but that's just deleting the fact that in due time things are going to get worse

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>>726198660
Here, read this and then go live it.

>>726198892
Nope

>>726198660
Anon I want to kill my self too. But I don't have anything to use

/b/ros, I need your opinions/help...
>qt3.14 from middle
>hit it off well
>about to pop the question
>pussy out
>she moves and I don't hear from her since
>3 and a half years later
>get text from her
>I'm fucking ecstatic.
>she moved to the town fiveish miles from where I live.
>close as fuck to me I could run there if I felt like it.
>we talk.
>be dating another girl at that time
>end up breaking up, she's not into me anymore. Something's missing, she says before she vanishes out of my life.
>ohwell.gif
>meet another girl 7 months later. We only date for a month, same bullshit reason. We're through.
>now back to qt3.14
>9-9.5/10 IMO
>5'2" Really pale skin, C cups, we can talk about anything at all.
>her BF, who's a good friend of mine, recently started arguing and having small fights with her.
>she comes to me
>I help her
> I keep her from leaving him
>youowemeone.wav
>decide to get her Starbucks one day
>bf doesn't take too kindly
>explain
>forgived.gif
>she enjoys it and we finally meet after three years
>hug.webm
>"Oh my god, anon you actually did it!" *hug*
>Hugs like these were the ones I've been missing from these other girls.
>at this point I'm considering helping them break up to go out with qt3.14
>deebly gongerned about my friend
>I can't do this to him, but I totally can.
Wat do?

>>726199094
Idk man you could literally use a mouse

>>726198822
Well, hang in there. I'm out of advice.

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It actually slightly offends me when the stereotypes of people who feel alone or just feel sad in general, it's always characterized as a girl. A girl even if they're ugly really has a shot with plenty of guys, because guys are fucking weird like that. But girls, even the ugly ones sometimes are so picky, and guys generally end up alone, but no one expects us to have feelings.

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>>726198892
I want to kill myself because I care about everything too much and its overwhelming and I just want everything to stop I can't stand the noise of my world its too much I just want the release of death I'm fucking tired I want to sleep.

>>726199271
Thanks anon, I really appreciate it.

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>>726199094

>>726199267
Nothing painless. I don't want to slit my wrist. I don't own a car. I don't want to choke. I don't own a gun. There are zero tall building near me.

>tfw you lack the verbal communication skills to get a job

>>726198833
>>726198728
I've never really been one to care much about myself. I like to joke about myself. A lot of people have told me that I have a calming presence when the shit hits the fan (for them), which is a shocker to me because I've always thought that I'm stern and unattached. There's a lot you can do with your life if you can handle your problems and help someone else's.

>>726199407
Jesus my guy how many suicidal Pepe memes do you fucking have.

>>726198892
Irrelevant. Im too egotistical. If I don't do something important I might as well just kill myself

>>726198649
I am so horribly sorry man. I know sorry won't bring him back, but please.. please, try to find a way to avoid losing yourself like you seem to be doing. I've heard of this type of thing destroying marriages, but I hope more than anything that won't happen. I hope you two can find a way through it, and maybe eventually, finally have another baby. Please don't give up

>>726198892
sadly this is not how it works ...
I used to think like that a long time ago ...
but its not that easy...
https://youtu.be/ZsXjCp_f1h4

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My bf of 5 years broke up with me and left me for a girl. Been feeling like utter shit all day

>>726199456
I stopped just now because of the choking . I can feel that. Fucked up my suicide too. It's like that suicidal tendencies song haha

>>726199263
Depends on what you want more a girl or a friend

>>726199263
Sounds like about every romantic comedy i've seen. Without knowing you or him I would advise letting the relationship continue and if it falls apart the girl will likely go back to you for support then maybe a relationship. Just keep in contact with her and your friend. Regardless, if you go out with that girl your friendship with your friend is pretty much done unless he is totally understanding... most are not.

>>726199580
Hey find some comfort that literally any guy here would want you

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>>726199479
This is the last one

>>726197473
>>726197545
what are you, a fucking 12 year old emo?

>>726199580
At least you know it really wasn't you. He actually wants something you can never be or change.

On second thought, that's even worse.

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It actually slightly offends me when the stereotypes of people who feel alone or just feel sad in general, it's always characterized as a girl. A girl even if they're ugly really has a shot with plenty of guys, because guys are fucking weird like that. But girls, even the ugly ones sometimes are so picky, and guys generally end up alone, but no one expects us to have feelings.

I hate that girls can't look deeper than my looks, if they did, maybe they'd notice that all I want is to love them and make them happy..

>>726199543
Ironically staying in these threads helps keep me from drinking. We've talked about having another baby, but it's just too tough emotionally right now. I don't think either one of us would make it through well if we got pregnant again and lost another baby. Thankfully our marriage is strong so I don't have to worry much about that. I just do not do well when I'm alone when she is at work. our work schedules are varied and when she is at work and I am at home I almost always drink to some extent.

The drinking kind of waxes and wains. Some months I don't drink at all and other months its everyday. Yesterday I poor myself a drink and after an hour I made another, and then another until I noticed that half the bottle was gone. I dumped what I had left when I realized how much I had drank.

no one has shown romantic interest in me. wtf is wrong w/ me.

>>726199407
If you care about everything so much then you have the drive to try to change things for the better. At the very least you can have an impact on the situation(s) and lower the noise a bit.

>>726200152
Yesterday morning my mum left a text. Suck it, loser.

>>726199737
Funny you say it that way. I'm usually the one to make jokes and people laugh. I'll wait them out, I guess. I give them two more months at best, maybe one if I try and speed that up. I am good friends with this guy, and I think he'd be alright if she was happier with me. He may have a rebound girl, actually.

You guys are all fucking faggots. "Ooh boo hoo tfw no gf" If that's your biggest problem you should be thankful. Women are in general disgusting and far more trouble than they're worth. Eventually they'll get board of you anyway and go fuck a nigger or something.

Where is the existentialism or dying family members? All I see in this thread is cringe tier Facebook text pics and whiney autists who have never seen a vagina.

>>726200228
Same here, the fuck is wrong? When I actually do manage to get a girl to hang or go on a date they get confused when I say I've never had a gf

>>726200021
Exactly how i feel no wonder men comit suicide more than women

I don't get this whole romance thing. I literally don't give a fuck about dating. Beyond getting laid, it doesn't seem worth it at all. Maybe I'm just immature or something.

>>726200296
either MGTOW or trap faggot

which are you?

>>726200365
>vomit suicide
>vomit
Kek, I didn't think I'd ever laugh in a feels thread

>>726198649
>caring about a foetus
Normalfag spotted.

>>726200228
nothing. I find that it comes down to the venue in which you are looking for a romantic partner. When I was single I had a hard time finding someone until I started looking online. I had good luck with craigslist and plentyoffish.com

I know a guy that is literally 300lbs and is like a 1/10 but he is married to a girl who likes threesomes with other women and foursomes. He also has a FWB as well. And this guy doesn't seem to have all the much game or money. It's just where he met these gals.

>>726200320
Funny how the way he discribed that girl is the same one in my life. And I think these exact thoughts

from my window I'm able to see a very tall bridge ... and I look at it every day ... and I know one day I will walk my last walk to that bridge ... for now I stand there, every week, feel the wind of the sea, hear the sound of the city, l look down the big canal and the big ocean behind it ... I inhale the whole moment ... and one day I will let go ... and fly into the ocean

>>726200123
At least you came to your senses and had the resolve to pour that bit out. Even though it waxes and wanes, there's a good chance one of those periods of drinking end up prolonging, and I'm sure you know the rest.. But with how strong your marriage is, I'm sure your wife will help you keep from reaching that point.

I can only imagine how tough it still is, so that makes sense. Glad to hear you guys are strong, as it breaks my heart to hear about love collapsing after things like that. In the long run, I just hope the fear of losing another won't be strong enough to stop from taking the chance. Because I'm sure it will be beautiful when you guys finally do have a child. Good luck and stay strong anon

>>726200408
Just a regular faggot. Wanna know why? Because women are icky. But the women isn't my point. Like everyone is lonely, but you guys need to learn to be there for yourselves.

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>>726200276
I'm tired of trying to work with it and trying to bring it down. I feel like my entire life has been spent trying to catch up to everyone else. (No more sad pepes)

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>>726200768
majestic ass motherfucker

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>>726198892
I actually did this.
I was about to kill myself, then I actually posted on here about it, probably because deep inside I was looking for a reason not to. The thread slipped down the catalog pretty quickly then was gone, but I got a few replies. I mentioned that I felt like my life had no meaning and that I felt trapped. One anon suggested that I escape. Physically, that is. At the time, I was a uni student, but what he said made me put down the pills for the night. The next few days, I did some looking on the internet, then a couple weeks later I just left. I don't have a car, so I just packed up some stuff and started walking and hitchhiking. I had a destination in mind, but what I guess I was really looking for was some agency in my life for once. Since then I've been living life /ontheroad/. It's pretty lonely a lot of the time. But there's peace in solitude. If anyone is actually considered killing themselves, I'd encourage them to do this first. It's given me a lot to think about.

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>be me 14, teenage spas fag
>make fun of neighborhood geek
>occasionally beat him and take his money
>ff senior year has
>biggest chad on campus
>varsity football with full ride to Uni
>neighborhood geek still my atm
>walking home one day after practice
>see group of kids jumping someone
>alpha kicks in and I jump in
>kids run off and I go to help the person they hurt
>it's the geek
>he sees me and forever haunts me with his stare
>his eyes were filled with fear and he scurries away from me like a frightened animal
>starts crying
>leave me alone anon, please just this time. I don't have any money and I don't want to get hit, just please anon please don't hurt me
>I hold back tears
>come here nerd let's get you home
>get him home
>mom is surprised to see me, says I'm the first friend he has ever brought over
>learn that evening his dad died protecting him and his mom from a mugging when he was 6
>mom calls him 'The Man'
>I make bs excuse to go home
>immediately go to my room and break down at the realisation that I'm a monster for what I have done
>ff now
>I work a shitty job after I blew out my knee
>spy on 'The Man' on fb here and there
>is engaged and taking care of him mom working at Ubi Soft
>'The Man' no longer needs to fear this monster

>>726200768
I used to do that back when Iwas a looney, instead of a canal there was a railway. I never managed to pass by at the exact moment a train was coming and by the time they were coming I had chickened out already.

>>726200924
Anon I'm glad you found your way

>>726200217
it is this thread ... because it shows me I'm not the onely one with teas fealings

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I just posted a long and involved storytime thread about my severely fucked up life, and the only response was that it was a shitty story. As soon as I finished, it got pruned.

Feels Badman.

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>>726200523
I proudly care about my baby. Most people here have some heart. Deal with it.

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>>726200838
i gotchu fam ur life seems p shitty

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Hey /b/ here's a challenge.
Give me a reason not to fucking off myself right now. 3.2.1. Start

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>>726200810
Wish it was that simple. No ones every been there for me, how can I know how to be there for myself? Its like the man in Plato's cave. No matter how hard you try to describe sunlight it just doesn't make sense to him. His world is darkness and your describing light.

I have an imbalance of serotonin, so being happy is difficult, I've been sick every single day for 7 years and doctors can't help me, I went to a mental health center and they said they were the worst patient they have seen

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>>726192466
Well that book is bloody ruined now.

>>726200806
Thanks dude

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Nobody ever replies to me on 4Chan. Like, ever. I post every single day in threads and nobody ever sees me.

>>726201187
welcome to the club m8

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>>726201187
Notice me senpai?

>>726200838
We all deal with that kind of thing. No matter who you are there is always someone ahead of you and someone behind. The fact that you have the time and ability to actually converse about this puts you far ahead of many people. Keep up the fight and go kick some ass.

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>>726191818
I've been sick every single day for 7 years and doctors cannot help me because I am a medical anomaly. I went to a mental health center to try and treat my depression but all they did was tell me that I was the worst case they had seen and that I have an imbalance of serotonin so being happy is difficult. I am 17 and my life is already very limited and depressing

>>726201187
I see you, fam.

>>726201187
Will you be my daddy

>>726201187
Bad luck?

>>726200924
good work anon. I hope your travels continue to bring you clarity

>>726201187
luv u xx

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>>726201187
lol

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>>726201093
Thanks famalam

i'm a genetic failure

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>>726201073
>>726201363
thanks guys, it's been interesting so far. my favorite place has been wyoming I think. pic kinda related, I took it while traveling, but not in wyoming.

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>>726201463
it gets worse

>>726201469
Hot

>>726201115
There are women out there that will sleep with you yet. You probably have some talent that will make you valuable to someone. Someone probably cares about you. You could go donate some blood. Red cross always needs blood donations and that could save someone's life.

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>>726201252
>>726201313
>>726201327
>>726201347
>>726201356
>>726201372
>>726201410
T-thanks.

>>726201533
tf is that supposed to mean?

>>726201564
No problemo peep

>>726201564
It should be writte "th-thanks". Think about it.

>>726201510
nice, where else have you traveled to (through) and what have you learned so far?

I'm gonna get my shit together. Starting now.

>>726201115
>>726200924

i didnt fuckin study for my art history midterm AND i didnt finish my paintings for another class and im so fuckin stressed about it im such a lazy ass and i have so much anxiety i cant sleep tonight

>>726201115

Maybe no girl is interested, but you could still try to get a good looking trap. its the same as a real girl, as long as you are bisexual.

>>726201720
said everyone ever

>>726201531
I WANT TO DIE NOW FUCK

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What was your moment?

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>>726201765
>you could still try to get a good looking trap. its the same as a real girl,

>>726201731
>Art History
lol what brought you to that major? isn't universally known as THE useless major

>>726201564
I know how you feel brutha

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I was gonna kill myself two weeks ago. I had my letters set on my desks and a manifesto ready to post. I was on my way home from school and I bumped into an older lady with her grand daughter. Makes a comment about how fast they grow. I look at her and notice the little girl smiling. Something about her smile makes me think that if I had a kid I probably wouldn't go through with this. Get home and load my .367 when my gf calls me. She's pregnant. I break down immediately and tell her I'm crying over happiness. She said doesn't know how close I was to biting the bullet. Whenever I feel shitty, I look at the picture of my gf and son. Reminds me that even a degenerate /b/tard like me has meaning in life

>>726201326
Shit sorry for you

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>>726201187
There you go dude

>>726201731
well fuck son I've been there so many times I dropped out
>you don't want to be like me do you?

>>726201960
lucky you there. glad you made it out in one piece

I moved house around 7 months ago after living in the old house for 6 years. been having some suicidal thoughts since, never acted on them, though.

>>726201960
wut in darnation is a .367

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>>726202052
that must have been one awesome fucking house

>>726193495
If its the same kids as the brother who molested you, then to diddle them is Karma. If he made you what you are, you should shape the next generation to be just like you.

>>726201531
Oh how I'm in the same boat as that guy

>>726201086
I feel you /b/ro

>>726202036
That sounds alot like clinical depression with a mix of anxiety, though with the way things are lately I don't blame you for feeling like everything is wrong.

I have a sneeking suspicion that the world is going to get a lot more violent on a global scale for about a decade, then things should calm down again... assuming we survive

>>726201662
I walked and hitched up the i-35 corridor to kansas, so through texas, oklahoma. then I went from there through denver to casper in wyoming. since then I've been trying to head back east towards illinois; it's where I was born and I'm hoping to make it there while it's still cold. from there, I think I've actually been thinking about stopping. obviously I don't have a college degree, but I was thinking maybe I could get to north carolina and get a warehouse job or something.

>>726202120
you have one fucked up notion of justice

>>726202036
You take meds? Meds definitely aren't for everyone.

>>726202259
What's fucked up about it? Just pay it forward.

>>726202186
Well as far as jobs go I would HIGHLY encourage getting something in healthcare. getting a CNA license is inexpensive and quick and the pay is decent. you could eventually move on to a more skilled healthcare position from there. It's sable work.

Had a fucked up childhood, mom always helped me through it. (Piece of shit dad, brother got arrested for beating the shit out of me when I was 10)

In my late 20s now. Mom's been fighting cancer last couple years. Found out it spread to her intestines and has stopped her from digesting food. Traveling home tomorrow so see her for the last time before she starves to Death. One last conversation. She's 6'1" and well under 100lbs now...I know just seeing her is going to rip my fucking heart out of my chest.

This morning...cousin finds my aunt has died in the night.

Fucked up about losing my mom....that it wasn't sudden but long and drawn out and painful....but also serious feels about reaching an age where your family starts dying all around you.

>>726201469
Same here bud wish my genes were better

>>726201187
gonna go to bed, but might as well wish you well before I do!

>>726202184
that's what i thought it was
but every doctor i've been to says it's nothing, it'll pass
honest question; could legit aspergers affect their diagnosis? i have it, i don't notice it too much but i know i don't emote much/properly

people have been saying that every time someone uncomfortable gets into a position of power
i'll believe it when i see it

>>726202330
what kind of jobs? when I hear healthcare it automatically makes me think of a pretty qualified position.

>>726202324
well for one doing that is wrong form the outset,. secondly the children did nothing to deserve that

>>726202354
So sorry to hear that anon. Good luck. Make sure the nurses don't skimp on the meds to make her comfortable.

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I haven't gotten over my ex. We were together for 5 years. We were a perfect match. Never a dull moment with her. We found a nice pad to move into, I got promoted at my job and so did she. I planned to propose to her on our 6th year anniversary at the same spot where I asked her out. A few days after Valentines Day we went out as usual. On the way back she seems quite. When I got to her place I walked her to her door. Asked what was wrong. She breaks down and says she's been cheating on my for the past 3 years. I haven't trusted women ever since. I ignore and avoid my female coworkers and don't talk to any girls at school. I don't even socialize with my roommates. I mostly keep to myself. I've put up my walls and I'm don't think they will ever come down

>>726202272
no, can't get a script for anything

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>>726202138
Whats even better is if all you want is for them to send you pic related so you can end your miserable life knowing you never had a chance haha

Thanks for all of the help tonight anons, I'm headed off to bed. Goodnight /b/

I'm really thankful for this thread.

>>726202489
And not paying it forward is even more wrong. Gotta move forwards, not backwards.

>>726202529
>putting up walls
That's going to be the worst mistake of your life

>>726202474
Well first, it takes like 3 weeks MAX to get a CNA certification (most places are alot faster). You can also get a unit secretary job with no experience or some places will employ sitters (for crazy patients) with no experience. Other places will actually pay you to go to school for a nursing or specialized certification if you agree to work for them when your done.

You could be a phelmotimist, xray tech, ultrasound tech, ekg tech(thats another one where you could be hired on with no experience) things like that

>>726202764
I'm not OP, but my therapist said I did this exact thing - putting up walls. Do you have any ideas on how I can try and tear these walls down?

>>726202474
oh and most CNA jobs (at least in my area) pay $10-$11 an hour starting and the pay here is actually under the national average I believe.

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>>726202897
that's actually really encouraging to hear. I've been used to a less than comfortable lifestyle, but it's been tolerable because of the travel. I really wasn't looking forward to living an equally shitty life in one place. I'll definitely look into it. Who knows, maybe I'll see you in another thread a few months from now and I can let you know how it's going!

>>726199263
I value my bros and my own morals far more than any autistic crush I might have. I don't know how close you are with this guy, but assuming you don't call just anybody your friend, I wouldn't manipulate their relationship just so you can get with that girl. Especially since it seems like you extreme cuck-like attachment to her like some other guys might. Since you are capable of fucking around with other girls in the meantime.

Also, if she's willing to just leave you friend and go with you immediately after, what makes you think she won't do that to you? Do you think "That would never happen to me!"?

>>726202862
I do it's going to be the hardest thing in your life I'm not joking. I put up walls and I'm still having trouble taking them down
>right ik this may sound dumb but a good diet and or exercise routine can go a long way
>build self confidence
>then proceed to talk to a lot of people
It's harder then it sounds ik I went through it hardest years of my life

>>726203107
I meant to type "don't seem to have the" between you and cuck-like

How come I never see anything that i can relate to on threads like this.
how come everyone wants to be happy again.

i dont even know what happy is.
everyone tells you to go out and do what makes you happy, to do what you are passionate about
I dont even know was passion is.
ive dated before, but it wasnt anything. Ive had sex before, it felt great, but it didnt fill a void.

I'm not a loser i have a solid job.
A solid career ahead of me.
but to what end.

At this point I refuse to attempt to date anyone because I dont want them to be associated what I am
At this point I refuse to think about suicide because the only meaning in my life is to pretend i am content.

at least this way I am keeping the ones who care about me from crying too.
at least this way only I am in pain.
Is this meaning?
I hope not.
meaning surely should not make me cry.

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I'm just feeling the standard aspie feels, really. Loneliness most of all.

I'm going to community college while working to save money for a real University. Trying to keep in touch with whatever old friends I still have from high school, but it always feels like fewer and fewer people want to talk to me, and less frequently. Like I'm just losing them for no reason. I'm also not really connecting with anyone new at college.

I just lost one of my closest friends over some really stupid shit, she hasn't talked to me in months. We've been friends since middle school but got close my senior year. We kind of almost had a thing but then I got cucked by a fucking trans guy, who ended up moving to another state to move in with one of his exes not even 6 months later. Anyway we had 1 or 2 stupid fucking arguments over nothing, and apparently it was enough for her to just drop me. Whatever. Shit hurts, /b/.

My friend killed himself a year ago, and in my emotional state, needed someone. Anyone. So I asked out this girl I was talking to, and we dated for about 3 months. Then, out of fucking nowhere, she just says "I'm not really feeling it anymore and I think we should break up, but I still want to go to prom with you" This was the week of.

And I've been getting more and more reclusive ever since I graduated. I only go outside to drive to work, to class, or sometimes to a little hill that overlooks my town. Only thought about suicide a few times because I know how well off I am, but some nights, the feels just hit harder than you expect.

>>726203216
Join the Church of the Eternal Fire

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>>726203102
good luck dude!

>>726200123
man i dont even know whats worse, being a loner virgin who will never experience love or having all that and losing it.
stay strong my friendo

>>726203166
See that's one of my problems, I have like zero self confidence. I posted at the beginning of the thread how my GF broke up with me today, and no matter what I do or who I talk with my self confidence never improves. I workout 3 times a week, but I still see myself as quite an ugly person - despite MANY people telling me otherwise. Any time people compliment me (which is rare) I cant believe them because i see it as them trying to just be nice, and them not actually complimenting me.

I dunno, maybe I'm borderline autistic, but I have a lot of self disgust towards myself.

I don't know how to fucking greentext this so I won't bother trying.

When I was growing up my mom was single with two kids. My older sister was useless so I did a lot to help my mom and tried to be the man of the house when I was 8. We didn't have much money but my mom would by my sister almost anything which left me sad and disappointed until I realized that couldn't happen if I didn't expect anything.

FF a few years and it's a joke that I don't have any feelings around the house. Eventually I got into it with my mom and shoved her to the ground after she slapped me in the face. I heard screaming voices when she slapped me and it terrified me. Ended up in the nut house that night because I was going to kill myself for hurting my mom when she raised me alone.

It was after that day that I truly started being emotionless. It started with not allowing myself to get mad because I hated hearing the voices and it led to me not feeling anything. My mom died almost 3 years ago. I cried for 30 minutes and then nothing since. I'm perpetually bored because nothing excites me. I'm extremely antisocial now and wouldn't have any real human reaction if I didn't live with a buddy of mine.

I don't date or try to make new friendships because no one wants an emotionless sack of shit as a friend or lover. Yesterday was my 21st birthday and I didn't do shit. I'll probably just drink my life away

Can the furfag in this thread kill themselves?

All I see is beta's, manlets and furries autist in this thread.

0/10 shitty feelz thread.

the internet is a malevolent force in my life

>>726203587
>greentext

put > behind ur text
>boom now is green

>>726203578
Like i said it's going to be hard as fuck I'm still going through it

>>726203664
Well thanks for the help then my dude. I appreciate it a lot.

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>>726203451
Well I can answer that question. After all my experiences I would rather have had the experience than not, even though it hurts a shit ton. I'm a big believer in going out and experiencing life, even if it sucks than hiding from life and not experiencing it at all.

I've seen love, hate, lose, happiness, joy, pain, lust, depression, and heartache. I would rather experience all that than be lonely because being lonely sucks balls. Been there, done that, still do it every now and then. I hate it. I hate my life when I'm alone and love it when I have someone to share my experience with or if I'm doing something new.

>>726203216
>i dont even know what happy is.
>I dont even know was passion is.
Typically you would just be thought of as an edgy faggot for that, but I'll bite. Those are generally subjective things, I think, generally a person can figure out what that is from observation of others alone, assuming you didn't mean that in the literal sense. If not, then I can't help you anyway because I don't understand them fully either.

>Is this meaning?
I don't believe in any sort of 'meaning' to life. I think it's a joke, honestly. The whole idea of having meaning to your life. Especially yours.

tl;dr: kys

>>726203626
>ha ha I am le internet tough man! kill urself autisms!

I'm sure you can't wait until you graduate highschool can you champ?

>>726201048
great story anon, looks like you really regret it so dont beat yourself up over it. man fuck thecteenage years, they are truely the worst

>>726203650
I know how to make something green, but I've never typed a story out as greentext

>>726203664
I may have fixed a lot of things in my life but when ever I'm around girls things change I tell myself that o can't hang out with them because I'm a disgusting brute with no class. Women don't deserve some one like. Women are perfect and I'm just a fat ugly retard. So yes I'm still going trough with it

>>726203837
>>726203650

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>>726203626
just for you instead of a zootopia pic

i kissed my friend tonight. it was amazing. i feel fantastic.

sending good vibes to all the sad anons in the feel thread~~~

hopefully your life will get happy like mine did tonight

>>726194992
hey where is that ?

>>726203875
You know what the fuck I'm trying to say m8

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>>726203973
Good job /b/ro

>>726199263
i experienced a very similar situation not too long ago
i'll cut out the details, what i've learned from the whole thing is that you can't convince someone to change how they feel, even if what they feel is stupid. don't manipulate other people's relationships, but you're entitled to be honest when your opinion is called upon. be her friend as your authentic self. if it's meant to be it will happen. i got the girl and lost my toxic friendships. she's sleeping next to me right now with the cat i helped her adopt. been dating 6 months.

>>726191818
I love Bladerunner.

>>726203973
Congrats dude! Keep it up!

>>726191818
I hate closing shift and Im not ready to run the kitchen alone when everyone else is off.

I wanna die.

I need a job that pays good and dosent involve people.

God i wanna die.

Ive been so uninspired working here. Its a job and im getting hour but fuck, i hate dragging my ass in there.

Plz kill me.

I'm gonna get my shit together. Starting now.

I'm so jaded, nothing that I do these days matters to me in the long run so doing anything is pointless.

I've been betrayed so severely that it's not possible for me to have a relationship with anybody that isn't corrupted by phoneys.

After the curse is broken many people will blame me for their misfortune and loss.

I have deep resentments against humanity and prefer to avoid the public.

Everything's a bore.

>>726204289
You won't though.

>>726192447
That's bad bro.

Whats the post limit on /b/? I usually use /pol/

I'm losing her

>>726193495
Break the cycle my friend best of luck

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>>726204522

>>726204536
thanks anon, I'm going try my hardest.it's a shame though because i really want to start a family of my own

>>726203810

Fair enough. I didnt really expect anyone to actually bite but I see how I could be seen as an edgy faggot.
for some context ive been cruising through post secondary, then starting a career. I've been "diagnosed" as depressed for 3+ years and it just seems like a joke at this point. I dont know if i was supposed to last this long or mabye i am just an edgy faggot. I feel that I just dont have anyone who feels the same way as I do so I might see what /b/ has to say. I'll try to take what you said and think on it. I just dont know how to put it clearly :/

>>726204255
Spend some money on hookers.

You can kill yourself after you get aids or go to jail

>>726204797
Well, you seem exactly like me so far (minus the successful part)

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My situation has given me so much angst that my highest ambitions are to kill people and rob people in order to improve humanities condition.

Thank you religion.

>>726198416
A (you) 4u

>>726204898

Well success is reletive isnt it. I have an extremely cheap lifestyle so i get by.
i do have a job that i can make a career on though1
If you know roughly how IQ works I basically have a huge capacity for knowledge, but I (Actually its been tested im not just an asshole) have a learning disability where im slow as fuck.
makes for this lovley situation where i can undersand anything enough to know im shit, but never have the drive to actually spend the rediculus amount of hours to feel successful at it.
then i feel like failure all the time.

ring a bell?

>>726195800
This the faggiest gif ever.

Quoting a tv show character, with such a shallow sentence is just purely stupid.

You're gay.

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Good night who ever is still awake its 5:17 and I have to get up at 7:20 fuck my life love the late night feels threads <3

>>726205751
i didnt click the gif at first, it just looked like another image of thousands

then i read your comment, and decided to look at the image you're referring to.

wow they are quite the faggot. what the fuck wild cherry pepsi drinking 12 year old saved that image

When do you know you can go all in with an woman?

>>726205601
Yeah, unfortunately it does.

>>726205878
when you notice that she consistently does things that make you happy you wouldn't expect anyone else to do

>>726205909

Well. I wish I could give you advice or something but, at least we are in this together.

>>726200396
I'm a pretty social person, and I understand if you aren't that it is difficult to see this but working together, doing anything together, looking at someone as you know you are thinking the same about something, falling asleep feeling totally comfortable and content with her in your arms.. When you find someone that laughs at the same stuff you do, and.. I don't even know where I'm going with this.

Fuck this.

I miss her.

Why can't we be in the same place in life?