Secrets thread!

>>726025798

I want to fuck my best friend's girlfriend and have for quite some time.

I've creeped shots from her every now and again.

I've never made a move on it as he's way more important than my desire to bang her but still

I want to give my cousin a blowjob.

I've wanted to knock up my best friend since middle school and have tried to pay for nudes of her

>>726025953
fuckin do it

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Secrets thread!

>>726026513
Should I swallow it? I don't know if he even likes me, would any anons mind getting blown by a qt cousin?

>>726027237
depends if he gay

I'm in love with my obsessed stalker.

>>726027703

Obsessively stalk them back

I always get a boner when I poop.

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>>726025798
>Be six years old
>Be gayfag
>Have cute 14-15 year old neighbor boy
>Spend summer afternoons sitting by my bedroom window watching him mow the lawns/wash cars while shirtless
>Fantasize about the two of us being married
>Have no concept of what married people do so I imagine us going to the zoo or taking baths together
>One day my parents decide to go out
>Neighbor comes over to babysit
>Am fucking ecstatic
>Dress up in my nicest clothes (basically polo shirt and khaki pants)
>Comb my hair
>Parents think its cute as hell, they don't understand my love
>He arrives, parents leave
>We spend most of the evening watching TV
>Take every opportunity to snuggle up to him
>I'm in heaven
>After an hour or so, he tells me to sit and wait for a minute while he goes into the backyard
>Comes back smelling weird. Don't know what it is but don't care
>He passes out a few minutes later
>Now's my chance
>First make sure he's out cold
>Unzip his jeans
>Pull out his dick
>It's big, thick, and hairy
>Didn't know what to expect but it excites me anyway
>Start examining it, poke it, smell it, touch my tongue to it
>He starts to get hard
>Suddenly he wakes up
>Starts to freak out, asks me what I'm doing
>I don't know what to say, start to cry
>He gets angry, tells me to go to bed and never tell my parents what I did
>I'm confused but I go anyway
>I wake up the next morning and he's gone.
>Can never look him in the eye again
>That was over 20 years ago. I wonder what he's doing right now

Whenever I'm alone with a dog, I make it lick my cock. Love shooting on a load on a dog face.

Girls burping is my fetish, but it's a rare one

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I still take the pacifier

>>726025798
>we ha secr all ve ets
what?

I've been blackmailed into sending nudes before and had them posted online without my consent multiple times (to the point I pretty much check daily to see if they've been uploaded so I can get them taken down). I actually kind of liked the whole experience (pictures being posted aside) and hate myself for it.

1. jerk off to my sister daily
2. sometimes jerk off to my mom
3. fucked my best friend's gf
4. steal panties

I've got a kid with a Thai hooker. Never told my family about this, and I never provide support.

Jerked off into my girlfriends sisters bra and rubbed my dick on her pillow while she was at school

I fucked my best friends wife the day before they got married. She has tried on many occasions to do it again but I won't now that they are married.

I feel like shit about it, pussy was mediocre too.

I abuse sleeping pills, because I don't want to be awake.

>>726025908
Is she that hot?

>>726031061
Is it effective?

>>726030390
Because it turns you on that guys(and probably girls) are aroused by your pics. I bet you also get changed if front of the window and don't always close the blinds.

I also bet you would love to share sexual stories with someone as long as they didn't know your identity.

>>726031255
At the moment yes.
Whenever I start feeling like shit I just take one, and sleep it away.
Broken hearts suck gay ass.

>>726030825
Your mom and sister hot? Got any pics?

>>726031516
I do expose them a lot but never say they are my mom and sis.

>>726031141

I think she's pretty god damned hot

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>>726025798
oh yeah tell everyone your secrets faggots. OP is NSA

>>726031955
well, expose two random girls and we'll do the rest

i cheated at mario kart once

>>726032660
Too far, get out you sick bastard

I just cheated on my girlfriend and weirdly, I don't even feel that bad about it
guess I'm a sociopath

>>726025798

I told a lousy cop how to elicit confessions over the internet.

I still feel bad about that sometimes.

>>726031959
Any pics?

>>726032577
first girl for me

I have suicidal toughts almost every day but I wont seek help because I secretly hope I´ll get the courage to do it one day....... god I can´t wait to end this shit

>>726031395
I suppose there's a slight bit of attraction to that, but what I like (and hate) about it is the loss of power and control. There's this rush that's exciting and I'll admit even a little addicting and arousing, but at the same time it's terrifying and humiliating. I wasn't overly thrilled about about my pictures being posted and shared without my consent, because I couldn't control who would see them, how far it'd go, and that unknown was the most terrifying part.

>>726033116

I have a few on my.phome but I'm not gunna oust myself like that.

She wears really particular outfits and it's really recognizable.

It's be really clear who it is if I posted it.

Lemme just tell you.

Thin, winged eyeliner, green eyes, perfectly symmetrical face, black lipstick, and slender as fuck.

She's gorgeous.

>>726033772
You probably like being humiliated and the rush that fear gives you. Were you abused?

I play with my pee pee.

>>726033644
I was in your boat once. Each day, I'd wake up in the abyss of loneliness. Kids at school shunned me, and I thought I was the one who was awful... Even though I came to learn a pretentious school garners asshole kids. But, that didn't stop me from hating myself and wanting to just end it all. I almost did, but thankfully I was a coward and didn't. That was more than a year ago. While I still have these feelings sometimes, I'm not living life to the fullest. Hang in there.

>>726034184
what about your wee wee?

>>726025798
Been creeping on femboys, fantasizing about having a cute, curvy feminine younger male as a boyfriend. Everyone I know believes I'm straight.

>>726031955
Any chance we'll get to see them?

>>726033788
Where you eve from /b/ anon

>Be 17
>Be quiet, awkward fuck compared to cool, confident brother
>Brother brings me parties in an effort to make me cool
>Go to a Halloween party at one of his friends places in the woods
>The yard is packed and no one is allowed inside
>Drink like a fish until people notice me grabbing from random packs
>Entire party gets pretty drunk and rowdy later in the night
>Sitting by the fire when I hear a commotion nearby
>Pocahontas got so drunk she lost her top
>Stumbles into me with her friends right behind her looking pissed
>"Pocahontas I swear we can't take you anywhere" yadda yadda
>Offer to help carry her to the house because she's falling everywhere
>Friends walk with me and show me a room to dump her in
>Leave with her friends telling me how terrible she is though they're probably not talking to me
>Chill by fire for an hour to sober up a bit while everyone else keeps drinking
>Wait for party to get busy and distracted with something else before going back in the house
>Find passed out Pocahontas where I left her
>Know no ones allowed in the house and her friends don't want any more of her tonight
>Take off her panties from underneath her crazy Indian skirt getup and straddle her while she's on her stomach
>Jerk off while squeezing and spreading her ass
>Rubs tip against her pussy while jerking it until I'm about to finish
>Push tip into her and fill her up
>Instant realization and the fear sets in
>Nope the fuck out but take panties for souvenir

>>726034410
Wanna try that one again?

>>726033772
I have a few female friends like yourself. Different situations and reasons, but kinda similar turn on.

I'm not saying to get naughty pics, since I wouldn't know if you or what site...But have you considered taking some naughty pics, covering your face, make sure nothing in the background to be traced to you, and "leak" them? See what kind of turn on, if any, it gives you. You might find the fetish is the exhibitionist part and not lack of control.

>>726033009
Then it's not weird you don't feel bad

Well im a femboy...bisexual :)

>>726025908
The only logical solution to this is to fuck your best friend then suggest threesome with his gf. He thinks its gay while you get some of his gf's poon

>>726034539
Jesus dude.
Any repercussions?

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I screwed someone over really badly this week, just for a laugh.

Specifically, I met this guy Shawn online, and eventually convinced him that his girlfriend had been kidnapped by a drug cartel and they were going to cut her head off and post the video if he didn't rob a specific store (selected randomly).

Never mind how he came to believe this story - suffice it to say that a combination of (A) him being a bit stupid and gullible, and (B) way too many details of his life (and hers) being trivially available to the public - were involved. But while she was soaking in a sauna and putting cucumbers on her face, he was driving down the Jersey turnpike to go rob a store.

He would have gone through with it, too, I'm sure - but a cop tried to pull him over, and he wouldn't stop. I guess they spike-stripped him and ultimately MADE him stop.

I wish he would have made it to the store, but I still giggle at the fact that he was probably crying like a baby when they came and pulled his stupid ass out of the car, blubbering about his girlfriend (who was never in any danger). It could only have ended more sweetly if he had flipped his shit and made them shoot him.

:-)

>>726025798
Some guy that was a friend planted a spyware device to know what am I doing, I made a report so he would get survelliance too, now he is in survilliance also.
he wont talk to me also this girl that even moved out of the city allegedly but is living in the same place because she posted were was eating.
Not even paranoid they probably think im a degenerate because been on /b/.

>>726034715
Fuck no dude I couldn't touch that guy

>>726034816
Never heard anything. I wasn't connected to anyone there but my brother and he didn't bring anything up if anyone else did. I think everyone forgot I was there

i regularly sniff my housemate's dirty panties and fantasize about her sitting on my face and making me eat her out etc.

>>726034212
Yeah everyone feels like this sometimes but after a year of this shit........ It´s overwhelming you know. Anyway thanks for the support anon.

>>726034715
I did the same thing

>>726035033
Just because he's there doesn't mean you have to touch him. Focus on the girl and just lean away from him i guess

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This thing!
http://www.anonvote.com/poll/a543077c

>>726034571
Where do you hail from, my good sir.

My wife and I pranked some of our friends and relatives. She posed in the bathtub and I poured ketchup all over her, took a picture, and sent it around telling everyone I finally killed her.
Turns out this was not a good plan. My Aunt completely freaked and called the cops, who now have my phone, and we are being prosecuted for "inducing a panic."
Feels bad, man.

>>726036032
Nice try rabbi

>>726036188
The state is too much info, I guess. And if it is then y'all are paranoid af

>>726036054
If you tell everyone about something, it is, by definition, no longer a secret.

Anyone who thinks Russia could beat the US one-on-one needs to do a little reading on how they fared during the Chechen Wars and South Ossetia War. Imagine if the US invaded Puerto Rico and took over 300 casualties in only five days. It was fucking bad.

>>726033953
I'd say it's a little more than probably. I do like it, I just also sort of hate myself for liking it, you know? And I was not.

>>726034658
I feel like I may need to reword my original post a little because I don't think I'm quite getting it across right. My pictures being posted and shared were the part I enjoyed least. What I loved/hated about my experience was more about the control and humiliation and stuff than anything else.

>>726033644
doit

>>726036840
Of course they can't. That's why Russia is waging a new type of war. It's about destabilizing regions and nations by influencing policy and the governments. UK leaving the EU, Le Penn in France, Trump in the US, etc.

I used to work as a security guard and I can't bear the shame of being a lazy jackass so I never tell anyone.

>>726035985
noice

I tried to murder a homeless man, but failed. I started by offering him a picnic, with a couple of subway sandwiches and a 12 pack of beer. We went up to this building where you can get onto the roof which is flat, has a great view, nobody can see you or mess with you. I dropped a sugar cube into his beer that had like 4 hits of LSD dripped into it. Then we had our sandwiches and drank our beer, and were just chilling looking at the clouds until - he was tripping balls.
Then I started talking crazy shit to him, trying to get him to jump off the roof, did get him to take off all his clothes, told him I was a demon and chased him around making scary noises, dude was seriously freaking out. Then I told him that there was a wishing well close by and he could wish the demon (me) away, but when he got close to this big pipe looking thing I shoved him right into it.
The funniest part of this is that it is 100% true, and none of you will ever believe me. The saddest part is that even though he fell down what had to be 2 stories (and landed with a LOUD AS FUCK bang) - he apparently survived.

At every chance I got I used to finger my sleeping girlfriend in her pussy and ass, I even took videos of it on snapchat and sent it to some guy who was into that stuff

>>726036893
I understood your post. I'm just thinking you might have a part of you that also likes being seen. If it was just the lack of control and humiliation, you probably wouldn't take the time to go to sites and have them removed. You would just let it be and go around for the rest of your life wondering how many people might be enjoying your pics. Just my two cents. Sorry someone leaked you. Might ruin your rush, but I'm sure you are lovely, people enjoyed what they saw and you have nothing to be embarrassed about. Thanks for sharing your story. Be well.

>>726037372
Nikmok a weld kahba

I stole my friend's charizard card

I've licked and fingered pussy of my friend's girlfriend 2 years ago at my house. Damn that was nice pink pussy, another shit with that chick is that i got into his communicator account and saw all pictures they've been sending each other. Movie where she suck his dick, her naked pics and stuff. Anyway she sent pictures like this too directly to me or just she was saying she've done this by mistake.

I slept with a 14 year old when I was 25 had sex with her for about 3 years even as she had bfs also slept with a 16 yr old during that time span... Idk it was a messed up time in my life

>>726034266
That too...

THAT TOOOOOOO.....

>>726036406
I'm incredibly paranoid.

I love those kind of things...
http://www.anonvote.com/poll/iw543078gx

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not exactly a secret but...
i had to take my wife to a mental hospital today for her second time. she has bipolar disorder. i'm starting to wonder how much more of this i can take. i feel like my superpower is patience and that's the worst one because it's never fun to use and there's an infinite opportunity to use it.

i love her but if this are like this in another month, year...10...i'm 36 and i don't want to wait until i'm old if i'm going to look for someone else. the best case scenario would be her getting better because i do love her dearly.

i don't know what to do anymore. i'm just drinking beer and watching shitty horror movies.

>>726038660
Divorce if you don't have kids. I'm so glad I've been single throughout my 30's. it's been so much fun.

>>726038003
Unusual turn of phrase, Arab.
I just submitted a mechanical turk job (proxied, thanks) to have dozens of third world kids run that through Google translate and various similar sites, so that when you look for a unique hit on translation attempts you will find a shit ton.
Protip: we read some of the same books. Spooks think they are so smart...

>>726038522
Shhhh chill son, chill

>>726038660
You bummed me out bro

I came on my girlfriend's wrestling belt and she let a little boy hold it right after, she didn't even clean it properly. Some little kid held my cum on his hands.

>>726038636
cute sluts! Second one looks like a good whore!

I used to cheat on my gf with my female bestfriend.
My female bestfriend is dating someone who became a close friend of mine but I still fool with her from time to time.
I want to take LSD for the first time but I'm afraid

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>>726038887
i worry about her if i was to go down that road. it's very easy to say "oh just divorce her" but it's very different to do it.

i love her with all my heart and i really don't know what would happen to her if i left.

>>726038660
If you are waiting for her to get better, divorce now.
If you have the capacity to deal with it and love her anyway, then do that instead.
They don't get better. Not ever, not any of them. They manage their shit with drugs (sometimes) and the people around them just fucking deal.
Can you just fucking deal? Then do it. If not, then get the fuck out - but if you think there is a "she gets all better" option, you need to quit smoking that shit cuz.

>>726038660
Get therapy as well. Join a support group. Your wife needs you and leaving her because of her sickness is weak. If you had bipolar and she was the one watching shitty horror movies would you understand why she left you?

Bipolar is hard but you can work through it. Source: mom has bipolar, parents married 35+ years.

>>726038350
Also i have another secret that my current gf doesnt know, that when i was in high school i was talking with my famele friend and we were goin out just like friends and just talk. But we were watching porn gifs and stuff like this, when she asked if i have a boner i said yes and she asked if she can see my dick. I was so shy , damn. She grabbed my pants and saw my whole hard dick. She never had a boyfriend and she asked me if i want to play with her tits and she has a really really big breast. I licked her nippels and played with her pussy but only through her shorts. Damn that was something new bois

>>726038911
Zebi rouhi ynikouk a nakch

>>726036054
I just heard this on bob and Tom like 2 weeks ago. Was that really you or are you just copying the story

I also used to break into email accounts, facebooks. I'd offer to fix and speedup friends laptops and use data recovery software to find wins. At one point I had a stash of wins that included practically 2/3 of the girls I knew. I sadly deleted that stash years ago.

It was amazing what percentage of girls were just as horny if not more so than guys. I read a lot of fb conversations and learned alot about human nature

>>726032440
JOKE'S ON YOU THE NSA ALREADY KNOWS THEIR SECRETS

killed and beat lots of animals for various personal reasons

>>726039375
Who the fuck is bob and tom? I didn't really think that what happened was all that widely circulated. You know what, fuck this board, I'm out.

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>>726039207
part of me might understand. she has expressed worry that i would leave her, she knows it's very hard on me too.

i don't want to leave her, it's the last thing i want. i just need to see some improvement. i want to be with someone who is as happy and as capable as i am. i'm not perfect and i don't expect her to be, just someone who i'm not constantly propping up and consoling.

>>726039187
do you have any experience dealing with people with a mental illness?

I bang my best friend's ex baby mama from time to time. Started only flirting but it built up into more with time. I think he suspects of me railing her but hasnt confronted me.The sex is very satisfying. Fuck it.

>>726039591
Rather a lot, actually.
My Mom = raving lunie. My wife's mom: just as batshit. Most of my brothers and sisters. I am a class-A sociopath (but the smart and friendly kind, I get along to get along, just secretly fucked in the head.)
Then I went and had a daughter. Can you guess what happened? Ta-da! Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
So, yeah - I might think I'm a bit of a subject matter expert.

>>726039087
take lsd, man, seriously do it, its mega

>>726039577
Bob and Tom radio show in the morning.

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>>726039876
sounds like most of those people were untreated.

you are an expert in your situation but my situation sounds different.

>>726039166
Sounds like you need to worry about yourself, friend.

>>726039987
Will I be able to know where I am? to be able to talk properly make phone calls and stuffs? Or I will be completely out of my mind?

>>726036525
Really anon?

>Area fifty one has aliens
Everyone generally thinks this even if it's a cliche it's a super pervasive well known one so a well known "secret"

>everyone knows
>aliens remain secret

I once put peanut butter in my ass and let my dog lick it off while I fucked a bag of conditioner that was jammed between two cushions.

>>726040284
that's just too much effort mate.

>>726027237
Just go for it, he's probably not going to turn down a blowjob

>>726040129
It's like being hyper sensitive to every stimulus, not like mind bending body dislocating and its not very dependent on your mood. you'll be fine. do it with others for maximum effect, you'll probably smile a lot and talk a lot. also see cool things but you never really leave reality.

>>726030390
I remember you from the other day, you have a great ass, any chance you'll show your tits?

>>726025908
Mate just post the god damn picture. Literally no one here cares, they'll never find out.

And even if they somehow did, trust me, your friend already knows that you want to fuck his girlfriend. You guys think you hide it well but you don't. We can always tell.

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>>726025798
This is the school that Maddie goes to. She's 15. I'm 32. I've been working on her for weeks, and it's finally time. On Monday, we are "going to the mall". That's code for, I'm going to fuck the shit out of her - she just doesn't know it yet. Jealous much?

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>>726040880

>>726040880
thats a ghetto-ass school

I Fuck myself in the ass with a chisel

>>726036893
i like the idea of hiding your face making it non tracable back to you and leaking some yourself. maybe a secret snapchat account without face ever. and i would defintely wanna see that

>>726041040
It's not so bad, but a lot of attention-starved kids there. It's basically ass-on-tap if you are nice, give gifts and act interested. This is like the 3rd girl from the same school I'm gonna bang, and they just graduate and go away and the next wave comes in behind them. It's just so fucking easy!

I used to jerk off in gf daughters room with her panties on her bed while she was at school. Rubbed my cock on her pillow too.

>>726040834

FUCK YOU RABBI YOU WONT BREAK THROIGH MY PARANOID BOG

>>726041527
Don't be a pussy. Do it.

i want to die

>>726025798
My mom's creepy ex-boyfriend used to jack off in my room wearing my panties. He didn't think I knew, but he's a fat toad and totally stretched them out. That plus I could smell his jizz everywhere, one time I think he even dicked all over my pillow. Mom says he was fat and sort of gay and had a tiny penis, but he paid for everything and never figured out she was fucking the black neighbor at the same time. He even ate her out one time right after she fucked him, so the dude basically ate nigger jizz.

>>726041781

Absolutely not broham.

If my buddy were to find out if probably lose him.

Not chancin that

i WANT TO anal my gf as she shits and farts on my cock

>>726042151
Well, have you asked him?

>>726042151
Sameeee dude

don't know if she'll go with it tho :/

I just cannot bring my self to ask my "Crush" for advice. Even though we are friends, and I really want her input her.

I just feel strange about asking for some reason... Even worse than just messaging her as a random friend

I groped my best friend's wife while she was passed out on the sofa and he was asleep in bed. It wasn't hard, she was wearing a long tank top and nothing else. I mushed her tits and nothing. I played with her pussy and not a peep. I jacked off on her boobs and wiped it off and she didn't stir a bit. I went to bed and slept like the dead. Woke up the next morning and she was naked on the couch except for the tanktop being wrapped around her neck and left shoulder. I got a blanket to throw over her but she woke up an told me not to bother, she liked being naked with me. She also told me I needed to take advantage of opportunities she was throwing down for me, if she was ever passed out and naked alone with me again it's because she wants me to use her like a sextoy. Wish she had said something earlier.

>>726033009

nah, just an ordinary douchebag

>>726042567
nice! how long ago was that?

>>726042567
That's my biggest fantasy but her or husband never knowing about it.

My gf and I bought condoms for my 13yo niece who recently started being sexually active.

>>726030918
If it isn't documented, it isn't real. She probably tried to Jew money out of you and failed.

>>726033009
>Another edgy pretend edgetard.

>>726043232
is she hot?

>>726033788
>The plot to every incest pornever produced.

>>726043232
Dam 13! Well at least she's being safe.

I have a crush on one my cousins. She's married but is smoking hot and has a great set of tits. I think she knows that I always stare at her tits because she covers them when I'm around. I get the feeling that she has some sort of feelings towards me back but I'm not sure. Help me out!!

>>726040602
Maybe, I'd actually taken one then but I just wasn't feeling like sharing another picture after that first. I'll think about.

>>726041250
It's just not really something I'm interested in doing, at least not regularly.

>>726043920
Oi lad, if she covers her tits around ye she doesn't want to fuck ye.

>>726043473
yeah, id give her a solid 8/10

>>726043611
that's our thought as well. We mostly just want it all to be secret from her parents, it's better for everyone that way.

>>726043920
Honestly it's best to just leave that fantasy, lad. Ye wouldn't want to ruin yer relationship. If she covers her breasts, she absolutely doesn't want ye.

>>726038887
Were the sexes reversed you'd have been traded in after the first episode. Ditch the bitch.

>>726044131
Didn't her mother teach her that her pussy is special and shouldn't be shared?

>>726044637
>implying teenagers give a fuck what their godfag parents say

I'm gay

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>>726025798
Bob, I love you very much. Every time I see you behind that IT desk I just wanna take my clothes off and jump on your dick! lol
Wish I had the courage to at least invite you for an ice cream since you never will do.. anyways. I can't wait for our daily smile/hi on Monday.

>>726044796
They should if their parents have done a good job.

>>726045047
is it 1950 still?

>>726045154
At 13 I would still hope so.

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I have a burning desire to fuck my cousin's pregnant girlfriend.

Pic related: It's her.

>>726045305
how is life under the rock these days? nice and safe?

>>726044796
I'm 23 and waited until I moved out of home to fuck my life up

>>726025798
>HS
>be wimpy kid, but friends with athletic asshole neighbor, both of us are poor
>douchy popular kid is asshole to me, nobody cares
>douchy kid smarts off to athlete friend
>big mistake
>one night in neighborhood, big kid jumps him
>I jump in on that shit
>kid cowering on ground, IDGAF
>pick up rock and throw with all my strength
>fucks up his eye for life. Not blinded but he has to wear special glasses
>that shit was 5 years ago. No cops were ever called on us

>>726045435
I started a lil before I graduated HS.

I post naked pictures of myself on craigslist for comments from strangers....I have a boyfriend of three years and he has no idea

Fucked my the girlfriend of one of my brothers and the wife of my other brother. They actively seduced me...repeatedly.

>>726045403
your burning desire is totally understandable, and I'm sure widely shared

>>726045414
Yeah it's nice :)
Seriously parents would have murdered me and I'm a guy.

>>726045403
fucking beaners

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Secretly, I think you're a faggot.

>>726045667
She's not Mexican, faggot.

>>726045667
Take a look again at her epicanthal folds. She's clearly not Mexican kiddo.

>>726045667
Fucking unthinking kneejerk xenophobes.

>>726044074
See, I think I'm right about you. It's not about control. You like the naughty thrill of being seen exposed. The first time you had no say in the matter. Now you do and you are considering it.

>>726046017
I'm going to save that one for later use

>>726045605
her parents would probably do the same if they knew. But in all honesty I know she is smart and assertive enough to have safe sex once in a while

>>726046310
I didn't have sex until I was 20... Nobody wanted me.

>>726046310
Did you at least try and give her the don't do drugs talk?

>>726046549
What kind of teenager DIDN'T do drugs? The fuck?

>>726037372

This story made me laugh out loud for minutes, thanks for making my night Anon!

>>726046238
That's more of a separate thing. I don't mind posting a picture on my own terms every once in a blue moon, but it's not something I'm craving

>>726039010
nice one

>>726046549
no, it would be stupid as the "dont kiss boys" talk. they will do it if they want

>>726046661
I'm sure you're living a good life mate, I wish you well.

>>726046253
Enjoy it as much as possible, friend.

>>726046895
So you're passing people off as better off than others simply because of a substance that's been qualmed only by social and governmental establishments? Use and abuse are entirely different, dunce.

>>726046661
Not all of us were obligatory edgetards as teens.

>>726045595
Post them here

>>726047039
Do whatever makes you happy bro.

>>726033788
>>726033788
>She wears really particular outfits and it's really recognizable.

What is she? A mascot for a football team

>>726047141
Speak for yourself mate. 24% of the world uses drugs each year, non-inclusive of other years. If considering lifelong drug usage, censuses reveal a 48% drug usage rate, with a mean of the age of sixteen being the prime age in which such illicit drugs were used.

I made a Grindr.

I plan on killing myself at 30 if not sooner because I'm a tranny and don't see a point to my life.

>>726047813
Can't you transition back?

>>726046737
Well if you are currently in a relationship, suggest bringing some Dom/sub fun into your sex life. See if it gives the same feel of the unwanted pic leak. If you feel you can trust him enough.

>>726042567
>I got a blanket to throw over her but she woke up an told me not to bother, she liked being naked with me. She also told me I needed to take advantage of opportunities she was throwing down for me, if she was ever passed out and naked alone with me again it's because she wants me to use her like a sextoy.

Cowardly cunt won't initiate.

So I have a crush on one of my friends cousins, she's cute and whatever. Problem is he's a bro. Should I just go for it and hook up with her or do nothing because he's a bro?

>>726048011
Plus she sent me a pic recently that tells me she's into me. Will post both her face and pic later on

>>726032660
That's hardcore man

>>726048088
If she's into you, go for it man.

Not really a personal confession, but nobody in my house believes me so I keep it to myself.

I moved to a small town in Texas pretty far from the cities, into an isolated neighborhood with a large forest behind the house. Everything was fine for about a week until one night i'm playing the PS4 in my room with no one else awake. An ungodly screeching sound came from the woods behind my bedroom. It sounded like something from The Thing, shit was terrifying. Stayed up the rest of the night under the covers until daylight, told everyone what happened but since they didn't hear it they don't believe me.

I hide all my feelings,im a combat vet but deeply depressed. Im an alien in alot of ways. I dont know what women want so if i can get drunk,i get.do all kinds of drugs my family doesnt know about,love to gamble,and contemplate suicide often. I wish the vien in my liver would burst so i could die alrdy. I also love jack kerouac's writing.

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>>726032660

>>726048320
edgy story I'm so scared

>>726031255
Order etizolam on the Internet. They are legal benzos go to shymolecule.com. Don't fuck withe the clonozolam tho

Sometimes when I'm lonely I put a tissue on my dick and pretend it's a ghost

>>726028296
He killed himself for being a child molestor

>>726047399

Shes in the top 1% of hot goth bitches

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>>726047909
I'm not even transitioned. The hormones barely help, and trying to pass myself off as something I'm not and never will be won't change the things already wrong. It doesn't fucking matter. I lost before I realized I was playing.

>even 4chan knows

>>726048524
kek

>>726032660
I am pold, and would unplug the controller on the Nintendo if they were going to beat me/my highscore/whatever. Still Excitebite champ to this day

>>726031061

I have been down that road.

>>726032660
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU

In love with my friend.

I'm 20 years old and live with my parents with no job and all I do everyday is go on Twitch and request racist songs (the ones with nigger soundbite in them) for shock value.

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I pranked a dude that moved into the neighborhood. I live in a small town in Texas, far from the big city lights - nice wooded area right behind our block. Anyway, this joker always goes into his room and turns on his playstation, then starts fapping furiously to some of the most fucked up twisted porn you ever saw. But he doesn't realize that you can see right through Venetian blinds if they aren't angled properly, and it's dark outside, and your room is well lit.
So, one night I wait until he's fist-deep into some disabled midget porn or some shit, and just before he murders another bunch of kleenex babies, I let out this freaky weird animal shriek. I don't even know where that shit came from, honestly; sounded like some shit from The Thing, even made my own skin crawl. Anyway, dude's boner shriveled up instantly, I think he might have shat himself. It's been weeks now, and I still catch him peering out that window, looking for the scary monster, LOL.

>>726048860
Aren't we all

My coworker tried to hook up with me. I didn't wanna fuck things up so I didn't do it but now I'm secretly into her more than I expected. She's got but she's dumb and a bit of a whore. It definitely would end badly but I want to fuck her anyways. We are going on a business trip this week and I have every intention of burying my dick in her

>>726049101
You're a god amongst men.

>>726034539
>take panties for souvenir
atta boy

>>726049204
Got=hot

I am married with a kid. I've been fucking a mutual friend of ours for over a year now and she is pregnant with my kid, wife has no clue.

>>726037372
got a good laugh out of me, i believe you
>shoved a hobo down a pipe

>>726025798

I think im in love with my niece. She 20 im 28. She seems like my ideal girl. I also think she loves me back, it might be wishful thinking though.

>>726049618
What makes you think she loves you back? If it's not entirely all wishful thinking

>>726041796
same

i have a birthmark on my dick

>>726049851
Not the OP, but I can answer this.
Relatives show affection and trust. Forever alone tards interpret any sort of positive attention as sexual interest. Ergo, uncle fucking creepy thinks he has a shot at fucking his niece simply because she smiled and hugged him one time.

>>726027237
If my qt cousin told me she wanted to blow me, I'd be hard before her breath cooled off in my ear.

>>726049101
i see what you did. good shit

Was gonna hang out with a guy I've been seeing.. Bought some new toys, new lingerie, shaved and did my makeup.. Now he's stuck still doing Uni work and I'm laying on my bed in my underwear and makeup done debating if I should send him dirty snaps or just find some other way to spend my Saturday night..

>>726046661
smart ones?

>>726045595
post pics

>>726050336
send him dick pics, 100s of them

>>726030390
So basically you liked checking porn sites daily

>>726047436
According to those stats, not every teen was an edgalicious drugtard. Thanks for reiterating my point.

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>>726050407
*sigh* this shit again.
Brother, I started fucking around with drugs (weed, mushrooms, etc.) when I was 12. My IQ is probably higher than your weight, and that is considering that I suspect you might be a land whale. This whole "only stupid people take drugs" theme is really so very, very tired.

>>726050011
nice double dubs

>>726025798
I'm bored of everything. I'm at the point where I have to pay for courses to access higher materials for most non-specialized topics, and I only make min wage; it's seriously fucking with me. I'm so under-stimulated at work I've taken to listening to educational podcasts for Chinese, Russian, French, wine making, beer making, and biochemistry because if I don't exhaust my head by bedtime I just lie there and think about shit for four hours before I fall asleep. I don't understand how my coworkers do it. I can't sleep unless I'm either drunk, or fucking blasted on weedy herbs, or destroyed on melatonin, or I've exhausted my mind for the day. Everyone else I work with is fine with answering phone calls and loading shit onto trucks for ten hours and then going to bed. I just can't do it.

>>726048356
It's time to get some help, buddy. You ain't alone. Not even close.

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>>726034302
are you me?

i think i have a problem. I have this thing where i feel like this group of people are watching me at all times. Its not like im paranoid that they are watching, its more like whenever i do something thats out of the norm for me i can tell that they are judging me and it affects my decision. So for example when im listening to a song and i want to switch to a different song and it isnt the genere that i usualy listen to or im "supposed" to listen to i cant change the song because i fell like they would judge me. The reason that i dont change the song is because i want to fit in with them. I want to be like they want me to be but also i just want to do what i want to do. I dont want to rebel aginst them or anything but its been geting more and more serouis lately. Durring conversation i wont say things that i would usualy say because i feel that those "types" of words arent something that they want me to say. I think they are molding me into some type of person that i want to be but at the same time i want to be that person.
please help /b/
real medical professionals wanted i will pay

>>726050830

lmfao

i highly doubt your IQ is anywhere near the top even 5%, let alone at the top

>>726048653
Keep fighting the good fight. It sucks, I'm sure, but it beats lying to yourself every day.

>>726027237
do u know where ur at?

>>726050108
Not forever alone. Wife,son, i lift, i cardio. Im in great shape.

>>726049851
Well we snap chatted for almost a year streak. A lot of times the stuff she sent was like her listening to love songs and making it seem like she was referring to me. Some of it was soft core sexual. Her in skimpy clothing.

She is so beautiful

>>726050948
Sounds like you have an IQ of about 140 plus or minus 5. Here comes the bad news: life is pretty much boring and pointless, and you have discovered this fact.

How do you feel about sex? Having lots of it is a useful distraction.

If that presents difficulties, you could become an evil supervillain, or just make it your mission to amass ridiculous amounts of money, or else find and join a secret hive of super geniuses dedicated to doing amazingly fun and cool shit, like trolling foreign countries and hijacking presidential elections.

Hint: that last one is for reals, but you first have to solve the puzzle in this message to prove you merit becoming a member.

>>726038660
Are you me? This is exactly the situation I am in.

>>726050830
Good man, good man.

I never seed torrents.

EVER.

>>726050830
You can't be that smart, because your sick burn sucks. The average American male weight is 195. You don't have a 195 IQ, buddy.

>>726050407
Read up on Kary Mullis some day. Guy pretty much made his own LSD in his garage and won the Nobel Prize.

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>>726051718
i don't either kek

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>>726051855
(Not OP)
I have 1700 Einstein IQ

>>726051936

no one cares

>>726051936
>>726052153
I do, just looked him up. Seems like an interesting man.

>>726033644
Don't do it...the world wouldn't be the same without you

>>726052097
This is the most aspie thing I've seen today.

>>726041497
>>726041869
Underrated

>>726042558
Just do it faggot, you got this

>>726052288
Thanks

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>>726052351
thank you for bringing this to my attention

>>726052351
That's twice you've complimented me now. Are you trying to get into my panties? :3

I used to shoplift snacks and shit with my friends like every week in high school. Gum, cookies, cheese, stuff easily stuffed into a pocket or my winter coat. The manager came out once and questioned us but we left and nothing ever came of it.
I remember once stealing 4 packs of cheese sticks and putting them into my coat. I ate ALL of them on the way home and had to puke when I got there.
It never felt like REAL stealing since I was still a freshman and stupid and thought it was just junk food. I never stole before then and especially not after then since afterwards when I looked back on it I was committing a crime even if it was harmless fun with friends.

I also used to shit in the woods for the fun of it.

>>726048860
Tell us more

I recently groped and choked my bestfriend for our media project. I really enjoyed choking her and i was supposed to just be acting, i had to be stopped as she wasn't able to breath. I got it on tape and i love the fear on her face when she was struggling. I used to be attracted to her but recently i hate her guts because of how she treats me. We also made out 4 times before the choking for another scene and i was only aroused by the choking, i didn't feel a thing while kissing and groping her (first time I've groped a girl too). I really want to hurt her more.
On a different note, i still get upset over my old bestfriends suicide. I wish i could've said goodbye.

>>726030390
More copy pasta from a few days ago. Get something original or gtfo.

>>726052871
Textbook. I fell asleep twice reading this shit. You should really expand your horizons a bit if you want to disturb anybody, this is pure Abnormal Psychology 101 pablum.

i love stealing nude pics from people i know, especially from my sister

>>726051259
See a psychiatrist.

You're probably not delusional per se, but some people get these kinds of feelings and it causes them a lot of anxiety. Thinking about it can exacerbate the frequency and severity of the symptoms. Most likely, the problem will be fixed within a few visits and no prescription.

I've been a lover for some girls with boyfriends in sucession now. It hurts me to never find a single girl I like and many times I only become the lover (i.e. the girl only tells me she has a BF) after we kissed or fucked.

>>726025798
I want to eat out and fuck my ex's daughter

>>726053377
how old is she?

>>726053403
7.

>>726053460
cool, what else wyd? just fantasy of course

I might be suffering some crazy mental illness bullshit but I can't tell anyone.

I can't kill myself either, too expensive.


But all I want is to be reunited with this person I loved, they got killed. that's okay.
I made a friend since, but I don't care. I don't. I've been just giving acquaintances money and personal belongings, binge spending on shit- and it's not even good reasonable shit. I just don't give a fuck. I drink mostly ensure because i dont want to fucking eat, because i just want to die. i now weigh like 90 now but im a gd manlet supreme. my mouth is full of cavities and i just had a surgery done on my face but i don't care i just want to die- i know i just spent roughly 1000 out of pocket on that alone, and that's been within the week.

>>726053377
It's precariously close to entrapment, my friend. Do you really want to be having the "fruit from the poisonous tree" conversation if your silly gambit strikes true? You will forever be ridiculed as the cop who wanted to fuck a 7 year old, but couldn't close the deal.

>>726049204
Post results

>>726049594
Dumb shit! Ever hear of contraception?

>>726053089
I wasnt trying to disturb anybody, just telling a secret

>>726054016
That's what happens when you trust women, can't wait for a male pill tbqh.

>>726053377

don't do it, you'll regret it later. Speaking from experience

>>726053617
> too expensive
You mean, too chickenshit.
> I drink mostly ensure because i dont want to fucking eat
But you drink it, because you want to live.
> i don't care i just want to die
If that was really true, you would be dead already.

So you are blowing money like there's no tomorrow, and heart broken and forlorn. Got it. Sorry to hear it. Now get over it. Or quit dicking around and actually off yourself. But this bullshit begging for attention and sympathy? Not gonna work. People die, you will too. Get over it.

>>726054327
Gib some greentext mang..

>>726025798
I prefer knives over guns when killing people.

I've fucked 5 of my cousins

>>726054770
what about when just wounding them?

>>726052942
Or maybe it's the same person

When I was in kindergarten, I convinced a boy to do sexual things with me. Of course at the time, I didn't know what it was, only that it felt good. Sliding our penises in each others butt cheeks, licking, sucking, touching.

We would do this for years and hide it, probably went on until I was 9 or 10.

I know "playing doctor" is not uncommon, but this haunts me and I feel so much shame. I've never been with a guy since and are not turned on by the thought.

26 now, and I feel I ruined my childhood as these memories fill most of what I remember.

>>726054779
2good2betrue what's your secret?

>>726054473
> Be me, 20 years old and freaky as fuck.
> My GF has a fine, hot-ass little ankle biter, 8 years old.
> I know she wants me, always sniffing around, trying to shove her face in my crotch
> Finally one day she wears down my resistance, I just can't deny our love any longer
> I start rubbing and stroking her neck, then work my way down her shoulders, back, hips, thighs, then back up her legs to the promised land.
> She is panting by this point, tongue lolling out, and clearly into it. So I just bury my fave right into that delicious poon..
> Then my bitch-ass gf walks in and shrieks, "Oh my god, what are you doing to my dog?!?"

>>726055047
they are imaginary

>>726025798
My girlfriend (who is bi) is deeply attracted to young teens

>>726054473

>be me a couple of months ago
>helping little girl with homeworks
>i'm in love with her for long time, going crazy for her
>she don't wear pants at home
>her mom is in another room
>she's on the sofa in weird position
>pussy at 15cm from face
>fuck everything, i'll go for it
>move panties to the side, lick pussy
>no taste but super soft and super cute
>she looks at me with a "wtf" face
>i stop
>she keeps doing homework
>spend next months almost going crazy thinking that I could have thraumatized her & ruined her life and blaming myself

>>726053333
Nice quads

I fucked my sisters bestfriend.
Worth it.

I jacked off into my friend's winter hat that she left over at my house. I came inside of it and the next day I gave it back. She immediately put it on her head when she took it back. I got an instant boner knowing my old crusty cum was touching her hair

>>726055233
0/10

>>726054857
It depends on the kind of wound

i like to beat off and ejaculate on stuff i know people are going to touch and food items. Something about it turns me on knowing most people at the office and at family barbeques and stuff have eaten food with my seed in it also really turns me on

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i want to cum on this face

>>726025798
I secretly think the rind of brie cheese tastes better than the actual cheese

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>>726048875
muh nigga Cx

Sometimes I shit in the shower and stomp it down the drain

>>726055696
>likes to eat wax

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>>726055656
another

BUMP LIMIT NEED NEW BREAD!!1!

I lurk these threads so I know there are people as fuckd up as I am.

I jack off while my 3 year old brother sleeps beside me. He can't sleep alone so I have to watch him, and I'm not jacking off in another room

I speak 6 languages and have never told my co-workers I understand everything they are saying around me.

>>726054453
if you can answer this question, i will consider just doing it
>I've literally been just dragging my feet and living for the sake of my family and SO whose interested in the same fucking gender our relationship is a front, their unhappiness is both inescapable and complete bullshit
>literally exist to serve them
>in trade i get a roof over my head and a place to bathe, that's about it
i've thought about just leaving them all one day and walking around camden until something interesting happens
I'm leaving a lot of shit out

I don't make enough monthly to live elsewhere

what happpens to my non-cosigned student loans after suicide?

I once read some stupid article claiming to be satanist, and being young and gullible I believed it factual. The article in question was meant to be very ironic I suppose, but I took it at face value.

So, per the article instructions, I kidnapped a baby. And then I murdered it with a .22 caliber rifle shot to the chest.

Following the article, I then tried to fuck the baby in the bullet hole. That's when shit stopped going according to plan: in case you didn't know, a .22 bullet hole is really small, and it doesn't just magically get bigger if you mash your dick into it a bunch of times.

I eventually gave up and made a bigger hole with my Kabar, but by that time the magic had mostly gone and it was basically like fapping on your sister's face. Not great, but better than diddling your baby brother, if you know what I mean.

>>726055926
It's actually a fungus. Penecillium camemberti