How often do you think about suicide?

I think about death a lot, but I actually offing yourself is fucking stupid, like your life won't ever get better in the 40-60 years you have left

I haven't ever seriously considered it.

At this point fucking daily, I have no talents and I'm stuck in a shitty min wage job

>>725601559
Every day constantly. Almost hourly.

Never just don't care
If I die I die

I used to think about it once per day during highschool. To be fair, my life was total shit.
But I was too pussy about actually committing suicide... would always think "I wish 'xxxx' happened and I die by accident."

Now, maybe once per months - I'm getting my life back in grip.

sometimes in a "I wonder how people would react" kind of way

Not really. I used to sometimes feel indifferent to living or dying but eventually I realized how depression was actually effecting the way/my ability to think clearly. Eventually, though society has conditioned you to believe that you need to go out and do or obtain something to achieve happiness, you learn that the real journey is inside. Everything else is just a passing circumstance

Young fag here.
I have never been depressed in my life and just don't give a single fuck
And I don't even know how that feels.
Am I fucked

I listen to $uicideboy$ daily.

Science and medicine are advancing at an exponential rate. We might actually have worthwhile treatments for depression in the next five to ten years. You may find yourself feeling better before then and not need treatment. Either way, if you're truly considering suicide, don't do it. I've had friends who have felt the way you feel, and after time has passed they're glad they didn't do it.

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>>725602542
>felt this way for most of my life
>"don't worry, it'll pass, it's just a phase"

>>725602665
Out of curiosity how old are you, I'm 19 and I can't remember a time I wasn't like this and I like to think one day I'll find a way to get through all of this

read the book the untethered soul by michael a singer. The writing is total shit btw, but the message is worth reading about. It's a good place to start for people who grew up in shite western society where priorities are basically based on money and consumerism

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>>725602936
22, only time recently that I wasn't constantly feeling somber was when I had gf.

Didn't last long and it made me realize that my happiness depended completely on her.

Now I'm trying to find happiness and a drive from within myself but no luck so far

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I like Ritsu and Im also horribly depressed, if it makes you feel any better.

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Being severly depressed and not able to see any joy in the upcoming years, I think about it daily to comfort myself.
Like, "well, when literally everything will turn to shit, I can just off myself".
I am aware of the fact that this kind of thinking isn't exactly healthy, but it feels like it keeps me sane (heh).

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I thinking about suicide from time to time might actually be healthy. It reminds you that no matter how shit things get you always have a choice and a way out. Might actually help us to function better in daily life?

when my adderall is wearing off i always want to off myself

>>725603319
yeah, this guy gets me

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>>725603059
I can't fucken finish books.
Whenever I start reading to expand my ideas I always stop after the first chapter.
It's frustrating. Where do you get the determination to read an entire book..
Only book I finished in the last year was The Art of Loving and that was only because every page had extremely interesting ideas.
I feel like most philosophical books repeat themselves a lot just to have more pages.

>>725603250
I like depressed and I am also horribly Ritsu, if it pleases the gods.

>be average jap
>everyday

earthquake that would kill me when?

every single day since i was 8yrs old. i am 25 now. honestly the only thing worse than having suicide on my mind every day is knowing i'm too much of a pussy to follow through even after all these years. i wish someone would just shoot me from behind so that i wouldn't have to find the bravery within myself.

>>725603104
You fucker at least had a gf. There is no reason to be *feels dead inside* nvm i feel u bro

>>725603404
It does please the gods, in fact.

>>725603517
>the only thing worse than having suicide on my mind every day is knowing i'm too much of a pussy to follow through even after all these years.
The other way around, faggot. Thinking about suicide everyday and not doing it means you're a have a survivalist nature. It's commendable.

>>725603517
This is my story too. I want to cash out more than anything else in the world, but I don't know how bad it hurts when you eat a bullet, and I really don't want to go to hell.

>>725601559
I dont. So long as im alive I will try to give good people a better life than what I had. The human race needs far to many improvements for me to just give up.

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>>725603319
The only way the idea of death can be seen as healthy is if it reminds you of how finite your life is.
How you should squander opportunities because you really may never get a shot at something again.
Your time is limited and you should never EVER think "oh maybe next time".

>>725603542
I met her in a psych ward, I don't think I could ever meet a girl who'd like me in "the real world".
Having experienced intimateness with someone is a blessing and a curse.
It's nice to have been allowed so close to another person, to have been allowed to be a big part of their life.
At the same time I am now constantly reminded of missing that warmth. Another layer of misery that wasn't there before.

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>>725603767
How you gonna accomplish that?

>>725603622
it's not commendable, it's cowardice. i'm not doing the world any favours by continuing to exist and waste resources. i'm not useful to humanity in any way. i would do better for my kind as plant soil, but it is in the nature of a human to survive and consume. I am not strong enough to rise above that, so I am doomed to stumble through life like every other depressed asshole who isn't brave enough to face the only reliable solution.

>>725603542
I don't know I had a gf when I was 15 and the fact that you used to be someone that some people could like only makes the pain worse

>>725603772
>Another layer of misery that wasn't there before.
Love is the nastiest addiction. Once you tried it you're hooked for life. It's worse and better than fucking heroin.

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>>725603772

>>725601559
several times a day every day

>>725601559
daily

Never used to think of it. But now I'm old (closing in on 70) with multiple illnesses. I used to make a good living but most of that is gone.

So for me it's only a matter of when. I'm not going to become some barely alive vegetable in a medicaid nursing home waiting for my diaper to be changed. I'll end it cleanly before then. But for now I still have some time.

>In early morning fog I see, visions of the things to be
>the pain that is withheld for me, I realize and I can see
>That suicide is painless ...

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>>725603252
I think you're off when you say "feel like it keeps me sane".

I think you mean that it keeps you feeling comfortable.

>>725603517
Get drunk on top of a skyscraper.

>>725603554
I please myself. hmmm

>>725603879
nah i've only tried codeine and hydrocodone and i can say they're definitely better than love. i can only imagine what heroin must be like but i can't get ahold of any.

seriously though you could have the greatest gf ever and i guarantee you would dump them in exchange for a good supply of opiates if you know what they feel like. nothing natural can match the feeling.

>>725603829
I see what you mean. I feel like you everyday too. I'm evil, I'm disgusting, I'm a negative influence on the world. And everyday I say fuck the world, fuck all the people, they don't deserve my compassion and effort. And even if they do fuck them, we can't all be good people. It's how the world works, evil people will always be here.

every day I have to fuck the same woman

Every day

>>725604010
They might be better than a long term relationship but they ain't better than that first month with a girl you honestly thought was out of your league.

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>>725604070
Try roleplay or sumth.

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>>725604113
Yeah, especially that first love. You gonna chase that dragon forever.

>>725601559
Feels like I need to drop anime cuz every time i see a kys thread there is an anime grill

>>725604136
i'll go with "or sumth" Something being to fuck another woman

>>725603767
In small ways as often as the situation presents its self. Its not much but people can dig tunnels with spoons. If even a small possibility exists that there can be an end to this kind of suffering its worth struggling for as much as possible.

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>>725604311
You should. Anime is escapism.

Get real hobbies

>>725602665

Doesn't mean it won't happen. And it still leaves room for science/tech advancements in mental health.

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>>725604364
I remember now the story of this huge crime boss who addicted to cocaine. Then he gave it up and has little cravings. How he did it?:
"Everyday I go out and do good. I donate money, I help people. Don't get me wrong, I don't do it for others, I do it for myself."

>>725601559
Only once, 3 years ago during divorce. But it was more an examination than a desire. I felt like now I finally understand how someone can do it, but I didn't have that feeling. More an understanding.

>>725601559
10 to 40 times per day. Every day. Way down from when I was a teen, which was seemingly constant.

All I thought about at the time was sex and suicide.

I've been thinking about ending it since I was a child. Literally, 8 years old thinking about killing myself.

Anime is not a real Hobby ? Stupid shit

>>725602665
31 years old. Still thinking about it.

I mostly think about post suicide scenarios.
Like the reactions of people who rejected me.

I think about it constantly. I'm not afraid of death, I'm afraid of becoming old. I'm a 22yo f, in a dead end job. My brother jumped infront of a truck and died 8 and a half months ago. Got kick out of home for being guy, but now hate myself because I'm in love with a male friend. I'm so desensitized by everything because of /b/. Could never have kids because I think I'm a pedophile. I wouldn't ever act on it though, because I wouldn't want to ruin someone else's life. I abuse prescription drugs more often than other drugs. I know I need help. But right now it's just a waiting game of when I'll lose the battle that I constantly face with my mental illness.

>>725605048
It seems your brain works differently than normal people's. That said the mutation can be negative or positive. I like a thought of my biology proffesor:
"Evolution is so slow that it doesn't affect us(humans) in everyday life. That said the environment we live in changes faster and faster. A beneficial mutation, can be negative tomorrow and vice versa. That's why you should never give up. We live in the best of times for weak humans."

>>725605130
I used to think like this till I realized no one would really care

>>725605130
They will most likely not give a shit about my fucking death.
Id need to do it in the most tragic way possible.
Like jumping elephant enclosure.

>>725605300
jumping in

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Less than you. You should try it and let us know what it's like

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>>725604763
That strength is a very valuable thing to have.
Have you met someone else?

>>725605118
ilu

daily, when little bad things happen even though i have a bright future

anyone in socal want to do an offline meeting?

>>725601559
every two weeks or so.

I can't kill myself because i'm 100% convinced of the afterlife, and it's super boring compared to here.

sure, maybe I don't get enough sex here, but if I kill myself i'm guaranteeing that i'll never have sex again

no sex in eternity...what kind of a stupid fucking idea was that

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>>725605559
Maybe your future is a little too bright.
Maybe you think that every bad little thing might put your future in jeopardy.
Maybe you should lower your expectations of life.

I cant communicate with anything.
Every-time i say shit with someone, i compare it to every other conversation i read or hear.
Out of all i'm still shit.
I fucking hate talking but if i don't talk to someone id feel lonely.
I think about killing myself everyday. Cant do it because i'm too pussy.

>I feel like an actual !DEGENERATE!
>Let me say it again
>Degenerate

>>725605845
Death is like an eternal sleep without dreams. You won't care after you're dead.

>>725602086
This, minus the job.

>>725605499
Indeed I have. No rush on doing things, but it was definitely helpful to move on and try again, very happy now. People are wired differently though. I've known 2 people who killed themselves, one younger than me and the other much older. I at least get it now. I don't look down on them. I wish it didn't happen, but who am I to say. Life is so short and yours.

>>725605926
That statement is something of a gamble. Since your not dead you cant be 100% sure.

>>725605946
> I don't look down on them.
And noone should, really. Doing what you want with your life is the most fundamental of fundamental rights. It is after all the only thing you really own in this world.

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>>725605909
They say you can practice communication.
have you tried?
It's not easy and it will take hella long but it's possible.

>>725605926
you seem to have missed the point of my post. I'm convinced of an eternal conscious afterlife that does not involve sex. so, on that premise, I can't kill myself.

you're not going to convince me otherwise

>>725605980
But I was dead for eternity before I was born, anon. I know how it is.

>>725606082
Not only that.
I'm also retarded
And also im never gonna let myself feel better about myself

>>725606077
Well said, anon. Things are getting realistic and intelligent itt...is this /b.

Faggot!

Whew lol, ok feels better now.

>>725606083
why do you even care about sex, it's fucking disgusting. bunch of smelly fluids being exchanged to create a smelly monkey worm baby. get over it and realise that sex is as worthless and gross as everything else in life.

>>725601559

About every 8 minutes.

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>>725606083
>you're not going to convince me otherwise
I have nothing to add then...

>>725606196
well, i'm white, so I don't produce any smelly monkey worm babies

also, sex is the greatest thing in the world, and the only thing worth living for

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>>725606172
>Faggot!
>Whew lol, ok feels better now.
Do you have Tourette's?

>>725601559
Fairly often, but I always decide not to do it on the off chance that hell is real

>>725606103
No, you don't. Your conscience began with birth. You don't know shit of what was before.

It's true the things that compose our body have always been around, as matter changes, it doesn't go away orbe created. But the phenomenon of our mind, memory, is only here as we are living beings.

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>>725606242
>it’s very unlikely that one can ever rationally persuade people of something: people’s opinions are formed over long years, through emotional dynamics, and ten minutes of conversation is entirely unlikely to make any difference.

>>725606291
Nah, just lame jokes. We could be friends.

>>725606359
>You don't know shit of what was before.
And I don't know shit about what happens after. I can only make an educated guess that it's the same as before birth.

pretty much everyday had the rope in hand last year fucking didnt work out lol

>>725606284
your race doesn't matter. all of humanity is disgusting and does the same disgusting things such as sex and birth.

i don't blame you for thinking sex is the only thing worth living for though because that's just instinct. animals kill each other in the wild over sex all the time, and so do jealous idiot humans every single day. it's unavoidable. i hate sex but i still jerk off daily and jump at any opportunity to have sex with a girl because instinct just doesn't agree with reason. i feel awful afterwards every time but it always feels right during the moment.

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>>725606393
>what I really mean is every duscussion is pointless. even talking is pointless, lets just fap to traps and post in get threads

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>>725606359
That's fucken stoopid.
If the argument is that consciousness is retained after death, something for which there is no proof, you may just as well argue that consciousness has existed before birth.
There is just as much proof for consciousness existing before birth as there is for it existing after death

>>725606582
I upvote this comment.

>>725606445
>one off trips
Nice effort.
I agree with that. All signs point to nothing, though. If a story can be true, Valhalla sounds badass, all the same. Irl call of duty and ting/drinking with your mates every evening. Until Ragnorak. Then you gotta kill a serpent and all ends anyways...or something..
Religion is fun times.

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>>725606562
No, you did well.

I am proud of you.

>>725606692
>Religion is fun times.
Drugs are a better time if you have money. If you're gonna live in an illusion atleast do it like the pros.

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>>725606539
What do you mean "didn't work out"?

>>725606582
Ok, let me amend it. Memory doesn't exist before birth. Only asshats who claim they know they were Cleopatra or Napolean in a past life would argue that. I had respect for you, I'm hoping you don't refute this..

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>>725606796
An weighs 400lbs and the rope didn't hold. Or the fucking ceiling collapsed.

>>725606859
>Memory doesn't exist before birth.
Memory doesn't exist now either. Atleast not in the literal sense. What we call memory is just a certain configuration of the neurons in the brain. It's not a "thing", it's a function.

>>725606793
Experimenting was fun. Ecstasy was phenomenal fun. Can't advise drug use though, so many ways to ruin yourself. On the other hand, religion gets the same answer from me.

I hear screaming down the hallways

>>725606966
Quite true, agreed, but you missed the point of the whole discussion.

The last time I thought about suicide I died

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>>725606859
>I had respect for you
pls don't break my heart
I thought we had something special

>>725601559
wouldn't go as far as suicide
but when you're looking at the clock after waking up, to calculate how long you'll have to dwell through the day before going back to darkness, it's getting there

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I do, but I want to commit a massacre first at a school or government building so I will be remembered like a legend

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>>725606894
Get fit so you can kill yourself.

Maybe when you get fit you won't want to kill yourself anymore.

>>725607091
Dreams are fun.

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>>725607161
Do you live to work?

>>725607174
Is that kill bill?

>>725601559
I'll seriously consider it every 2 months or so. Never for more than a week, though.

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>>725607256
Have you ever talked to someone irl about this?

Have you ever told someone you love them?

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>>725607112
Don't tease my eternal soul with sarcasm.

>this thread feels like 2005, and it's so good. Op rocks.

>>725601559
Every time I sit and remember your mother op. The good memories we had before the divorce . The time she got fucked by a black guy in orgy or the time while she was pregnant with you she let a pit bull take her. Ahhh... good times

>>725607368
don't ever feel like you're in 2005. that year will never come back. you are doomed to dwell in dat boi fampai wew lad catch me outside how about that

>>725606393
Sadly thats true. Even when an outsider can easily spot the flaws people will believe as they wish.

In a way this thread is kind of beautiful, because it's a bunch of losers around the world with no friends trying to make each other feel better about being completely useless in every way

>>725607054
Ok, what was the point? You said you belive in afterlife, I said I don't. You started talking of preservation of memory after death, I told why that is very unlikely.

>>725607507
isn't it fucked how the only way we can connect on /b/ now is through suicide threads, amidst all the porn and advertising spam that's related to porn?

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>>725607468
Now listen here, nigger. I said the thread, not me literally. Speak again and I'll send your ass to the red witch.

>>725607587
This is the only way I can connect to anyone and I'm a fag so I can't even relate to the porn

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>>725607368
I don't get attached to people easily, I am a very fragile person so I like to protect myself.

>>725607439
My parents divorced when I was eight years old.
When I was around thirteen years old my mother got a crush on someone from turkey.
We went on a holiday to turkey so she could meet him.
We stayed in a hotel, he stayed with us.
One room, two beds.
I was in the same room with my mother when she had sex with him.
To this day I have no idea what effect that had on me. I can't imagine that it didn't affect me at all.

>>725607626
pepe is the closest thing you will ever get to anyone giving a shit about your nostalgia, old timer. the past will never come back.

>>725607545
Ok, I'm lost on your logic...I don't believe in an afterlife at all, I simply understand the elements of us have been parts of many others, and will be in the future. "I" will be gone though, I sincerely believe that. I said nothing about memory preservation being real. The exact opposite.

>>725607794
Okay, maybe it was another anon I was arguing with previously. We should really get the ID's back.

>>725607700
oh boohoo your mom fucked some dude when you were a kid and you heard some of it or whatever

do you know what a dick tearing open your pussy when you're 10 years old feels like?

do you know what it feels like to turn into a total slut and fuck at least 3 random virgin boys a year in an attempt to cope with that?

enjoy being mildly depressed and having losers on 4chan reinforce it for you, you dope

>>725607712
The future rocks, dumbass. So do things from the past. Live a lil more. And ffs don't make a thread about how /b is dead.

>>725607882
You said it, /brother. Bring ID back!

>>725607967
This. We live in the best possible time to be alive. By all statistics life is getting longer and better.

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>>725607507
This is why I fucking love talking about depressing things.
About how things suck, how I'm a failure, how there is no future.
Sadly it's easiest online. I also really like talking about this irl but I don't know many people and most people I know are "healthy" (as in: they're satisfied with their life).

>>725607921
I'm not whining, I just couldn't take you seriously so I just replied with whatever came to mind.
It happened to be a memory.

>>725607967
the future is only good if you're happy about the cyberpunk shit from video games and anime.

oh cool you get to look at new porn while your government installs fucking telescreens in your pocket!

go fuck yourself shill. i hope part of your pathetic family crashes their stupid car and dies like every other asshole these days does.

>>725608136
No need to think so negatively about progress. Let me give you another future. We discover unlimited energy. We don't need to kill animals and plant life anymore. Entire world is green paradise. That's possible too, right?

>>725608245
the Emerald Dream is not compatible with the existence of humans

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>>725607700
Jesus christ, dude. Very similar to me. I wonder the consequences of it often.

>>725607921
Dafuq? Everyone's pain is real, mr. Autismo. Objectively things can be incredibly worse, but the pain is there. We can't all know the feeling of an abused and raped girl in India, but our pain is still real.

>>725601559
How many seconds are in a day?

>>725601559
I don't, but I've got a good life so...

>>725608285
Yeah, maybe maybe not. We don't know how much our thought process will change in 100 years. 100 years ago people said going to the moon is impossible. Go a 100 more back and you find people said flight is impossible. Why would destroy nature if we can make synthetic EVRYTHING. It is possible with an unlimited(almost) energy source, we have the technology already, it's just not economically viable.

>>725601559
never, really. I would sooner run off and try to change my life drastically.

If I were to kill myself, I would definitely either rape someone (or multiple) and/or go for a new high score, maybe in a mall. Then kill myself.

But there is too much I want to see/experience in this world for me to ever give up. Fuck, there is more media that I want to consume than there is time for in 1 lifetime, and here I am on 4chan instead

>>725608328
was speaking from personal experience but okay let's just pretend i'm fucking stupid and this stuff only happens in wedontpooinlooistan

>>725608136
That'd be hard since we don't have a car, our country runs via trains just fine. Lovely attitude though, you're gonna go far.

>>725601559
About two or three times a day. It seems like the easiest way out of my problems which will take 8-10 years of demeaning hard work to get out of.

I feel for people who feel it's their only option but wouldn't it be better if you just chose a life of crime or ran from your problems in some exciting way?

I came really close to the edge two weeks ago after some bad news. I really felt like I failed myself and got on the balcony and decided to flip a coin twice. IF it's tails twice in a row I will jump 12.5% chance. It was tails then heads.

I kept thinking about my failures and needed a mental break. I came about some money in a reckless and illegal manner, after I scored about $300 (in 2 hours) I called up a hooker I found on backpage. She told me I was really handsome and surprised I needed to pay for it (backhanded compliment) so I hatefucked her.

I bought some weed from a local dispensary and found a 19 year old chick on craigslist who wanted to smoke up. She stole a bunch of my booze and bolted when I was in the washroom.

All in all i haven't gone out on the balcony for 2 days and I have made some ammends for the things I fucked up. Aside from losing two bottles of tequila (worth like $120) I had a pretty good time.

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>>725608328
Right? It doesn't seem like it affected me that much, or at least I can't really link it with anything but it's definitely something that made an impact and not something I'd consider normal for a kid.

>>725608353
60*60*24
is this math?

>>725608387
Tell me about the good life!
What keeps you chugging along?

>>725608421
your optimism breaks my heart

if man could do this maybe i could give a shit about my life

but it's clear humanity at large doesn't want this stuff to happen because it might be a little too inconvenient for their business or whatever

>>725607248
Blood plus (anime)

>>725608458
And I was exxagerating to make a point.

Your suffering must have been horrendous, and mine is vastly different. I only say that we, as humans, take in these things very similarly, dependent on our experiences.

>>725608594
>it's clear humanity at large doesn't want this stuff to happen because it might be a little too inconvenient for their business or whatever
People said the same about industrial revolution but it still happened. Yes, jobs and businesses were destroyed but society adapted in the end.

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>>725608607
No way dude, that's kill bill:
https://youtu.be/L1D8Kaz4_XE?t=5m18s
5:18

>>725608469
What now?
What will you do?

>>725608469
Sound like a fun time.

>>725608678
the industrial revolution didn't end and society did not adapt. the majority of jobs depend on destruction and regulation prevents those jobs from being taken. the political climate in the US is directing us more towards destruction than regulation but either way it is pointless. either we give more people jobs and harm the environment more, or we kill the economy to protect the environment. either way we fuck ourselves. the only thing humanity can do at this point is to choose to die either slowly or quickly, and we don't even know which choice will do it.

Yeah man that's my mentality too. I would sooner fake my death and run off to a rural area in the bible belt. Change my name to Ezekiel and pretend to be a runaway Mormon. I would seek a carpentry job and tithe 10% of my earnings while attempting to ingratiate myself in a local church community. After five or six years and lots of hard but fulfilling work I will have the respect of the community and seek the title of deacon in the church. With luck I can marry a rich man's daughter and work for him learning a trade or skill. After four more years a wedding and a two beautiful children my day's will rarely be empty. Standing as a pillar of my community I will seek political office and represent the local interests looking to develop our small town into a metropolitan area.

Even if it takes my lifetime and more I will give everything I have to make this town worth something and leave behind a legacy that my great grandchildren will still benefit from. Being humble I won't forget my roots and I will post regularly to KYS threads on four chan.

>>725601559
daily, constantly

if I had access to a gun it woud have already been done

>>725609000
Ok, maybe you're right and we haven't adapted to it yet. You could argue that it's not complete yet. Still my point stands. Once the genie is out of the bottle, no government or corporation has the power to stop it.

>>725609040
doesn't work like that. the moment the community knows you tried to mate with one of their own, they will kill you and your mate to keep your blood out of their society.

>>725608807
I feel like I put my shitty feelings into perspective and it gave me the will to keep going. If things go bad I will go out on that balcony again and flip those coins.

What I really learned was that bad decisions and shitty moments are temporary. Maybe I can't tough it out and I'll kill myself but I need to try something different before that final option.

If shit gets real bad I might try something more serious, criminally. If i don't flip tails twice, it is a 12.5% chance after all which isn't insignificant

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>>725609000
>this guy had trips
You were the chosen one, but failed by being emo and somehow equating the industrial revolution to the USA.

But then again, you proved to be a loyal /btard.

I'm conflicted.

>>725609156
After courting and making an honest women of her. I am talking about a life devoted to a (albeit false) piousness that will allow me to honestly join a community.

And not joining a mormon community, pretending to be a reformed mormon.

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>>725609000
IT'S ALMOST 9000!!!

>>725609298
life is garbage, embrace absurdity. /b/ was created with the knowledge that assholes like us would congregate to it. nihilism and absurdity is the closest thing you will get to anyone giving a shit about anything here. that's the way it's always been. seeking optimism or just any sort of in-depth philosophy on /b/ is like asking children about sex. you'll either get nothing useful, hear some horror stories, or enjoy it because you're a sick fuck. and yeah i know most people here will choose option 3 but that's part of the point.

>>725601559
I have the suicide help line memorized. But surprisingly enough I don't think about it seriously. I mean yeah I consider it all the time but I don't know if I'd ever actually do it.

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I wish I could cry

>>725610388
Crying aint gonna do shit ezekiel

write a note, saying you jumped in the river or that you swam until you couldn't see land. If you are ready I will tell you where I live. I will teach you carpentry and you can have temporary lodging and some clothes from our church.

In a few months you will have your own place and a friend to help you through this

>>725609484
It is 9000!

GARBAGE

>>725610752
Actually it's 80,623 times that, more or less.

But w/e, Goku got his ass handed to him. Only 'the power of friends and love' got Vegeta taken down.

>>725611393
Oh I'll take vegeta down bro.

If you know what I mean bro.

>>725601559

Couple times a week.

My job is dirt simple for ok money but still ultimately frustrating because there's no stable communication or structure whatsoever.

My family is broken because my sister continues to use her kids as a poker chip against my parents for reasons I'll never fully understand. Seeing my mom and dad being continually heartbroken while my sister claims it's their own fault for feeling that way is devastating to me and I can't do anything to fix it.

I know for a fact that I'll likely never have the money I need to live comfortably and travel and I really don't want to start over again career wise for the third time in five years. Partially because I'm lazy but also because the whole existensial crisis thing playing in my head (everything is ultimately zero sum, nothing in this world has any permanance, blah blah blah).

The whole idea for going on for the next 50-60 years is not appealing to me in the least. If I had some way of transferring my remaining years to someone worthy, like a kid's dying parent or the guy that was on the verge of curing cancer, I'd probably do it without question.

The only thing I have going for me right now is that for the first time in my life I'm with a woman that makes me feel like the closest approximation to normal I'll likely experience. But even with that, I know she'd eventually move on and find someone else.

So, yes, I do think about ending it a few times a week. I don't because the people in my life that care about me would be completely devastated. Personally, I don't know how folks with no family, friends, SOs, etc. are able to live without wanting to eat a gun.

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>>725611835
>Personally, I don't know how folks with no family, friends, SOs, etc. are able to live without wanting to eat a gun.

hehe.. hheehehehe.. ahahahehee.. aaahahah.. ahaaAHA.. AHAHAHAHAHFSFHsdofpasdjgfkillmeplsdsgfjdg

>>725601559
not alot

>>725601559
A few times, like the times I think about Ritsu

Maybe a couple times a month

Twice a week maybe?

Alot. Actually I'm going to the mental hospital tomorrow so wish me luck...

>>725614453
GL bro, hope you figure it out.

And if ur a chick and need fulfillment/live in toronto, hit me up. I'd love to get you pregnant.

>>725602264
This , everytime I think about suicide I feel like I want to do it so people would feel sorry for me , so that's how I know I will never off myself

I've failed too many times now
Next time I will kill someone else

>>725601559
The question would be, how often do I not think about suicide? Maybe once a week.

>Getting tired of this shit