feels thread please

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>>725324488

>>725324488
Wuts wrong anon

>>725325612
more like what isnt at this point amirite haha

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my dumb is done

>>725325930
This gets me everytime.

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does anyone here have the story that has a bunch of butterflies pictures because a girl in the story died and the only thing she would draw was butterflies? i'm sorry if that's too vague i'm trying to remember how the story went

>>725324488
fuck you bitch I hate you so much it hurts
IT LITERALLY HURTS OP

I just hope that at sometime a day or two will pass where I don't think about her.

>>725324488
I got turned down from my #1 & 2 colleges today

>>725325625
Missed opportunity for his dad to say
>So long, Space Cowboy
0/10

>>725325910
ya and I hope that kid and every kid that bullied little man dies a horrible slow death.

>>725327855
it's been 5 yers for me Anon. I've had things with other girls...but even with them I feel lonely with out her

>>725324488
Whaaaah whaaah

>>725327672
Ey bud.

>>725328102
lol fucking sucks, go to community college and start setting realistic expectations for yourself

>>725328102
Would it be the end of the world to do Junior College first? I wouldn't recommend two years. I'd say do three semesters and avoid any classes that have aything to do with your planned major.

>>725328991
Good god I hope that doesn't happen to me. Well I guess there's always heroin. How long were you with her and what in your mind made her different to anyone else you've been with? Also why did you breakup? Sorry for the spanish inquisition.

>>725328102
In addition to that:
I have no friends and I really want some
I moved to NY 2 years ago and everything's been awful since
My ex killed himself after I moved
I've never gotten over it, even a little bit
My cat is sick and I love him more than anything
I spend everyday on the computer doing nothing
I've lost interest in my old hobbies
I'm getting an STD panel test back soon and if I have HIV I'm going to kill myself
I might have it because of some stuff I've done lately
I'm tired all the time
I've stopped eating well
I think there's something wrong with me
I don't have anything to show for my life
I think I'm pursuing the wrong profession
Aging terrifies me, I want to go back
I think I'm weird looking in some way
Nobody genuinely wants to spend time with me
I have real suicidal thoughts lately, I think about ways that I could stop being alive
I'm timid and scared of the world, I have a deeply rooted distrust within me
I'm small. I've been feeling how small I am lately, how little anyone cares. I have no one anymore.

sorry, wanted to vent a bit

This isn't exactly feels worthy, but it comes to my mind every now and again.

Some day, when we're all old and grey (if we last until then) we'll tell stories of this board. Be it to your own grandchildren, or a patient bartender who's only half-listening. You'll tell tales of the rekt threads and political debates you had. The people you met and the anons who offered advice. How the anonymity brought the high potential for crime admissions.

We'll probably see the end of 4chan in our lifetime. When the site closes its doors, and the mods are out of a job, we'll look back at these browsing sessions as some of the happiest times of our lives. I fucking love you guys.

>>725329441
what profession?

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>>725326335
>>725326111
>>725326073
>>725326025
>>725325910
>>725325700
>>725325625

My brother died about four years ago. He had moved to florida about three years before he died. He got married down there and I didnt go, it was a cruise and i couldn't afford it. When he was dying of cancer in the hospital my whole family went down and i didnt. I remember the last time i saw him, he was sitting in my parents living room before he left. I walked by and said hi but didnt talk to him. When i was in the mental hospital he was the only one to come and visit me other than my parents. i think about him almost ever day

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>>725324488
>At this point i never see time as years months or years
>its just another day being alive
>dates never matter to me
>the only reason why im reminded of dates is school
>Been crying before i sleep for nights on end understanding it wont get better unless i do so

>but in my mind life is beautiful

for now at least

>>725326299
this one hurts

>>725329736
Classical performance on Upright bass
I don't know what I'd do if not that considering how much time and money I've already invested

>>725329137
>>725329102
I got into my #3 program but they didn't give me anywhere near the amount of scholarship money I was looking for

still haven't heard back from everyone though so it's still somewhat up in the air
im just especially depressed tonight

>be me
>7th grade
>go to private school
>brother is moving to middle school
>he wants to go to online school
>convince him, against his wishes to go to my school
>was a beta cuck, he would be one of my few friends
>next year rolls around
>seems like hes having fun
>3 months into the school year, come home
>see my 11 year old brother in tears with a knife in his hand
>blood everywhere
>call 911, he gets put in mental hospital for 2 weeks
>when he gets back, he isn't the same
>literally on so many pills to the point where he can barely remember who I am
>hear him every night crying himself to sleep

There's more to the story, and will post a follow up if wanted, but I haven't gotten a good night's sleep in 6 years. I can't help but blame myself for all of it.

>>725329679
this has crossed my mind too. its really saddening.

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I miss so much those nice hot summer afternoons playing quake and bating to him on the cam... Guess its gone forever.

>>725329679
fuck, never thought of that. i love you guys

>>725330245
Continue

>>725330351
elaborate?

>>725329371
It's funny and sad that I too have always considered heroin as a nothing left to lose situation. Anyway, we were together of and on from 7th grade up until we both went away to college. She was the only one that made me want to be a better me. ( i don't by myself because i'm an insecure faggot) and i couldn't spend enough time with her. She wanted to not be held back going into college and I also suspect she started realizing how much better she could do than me.
Turns out 5 years later I haven't progressed, and am by no means anywhere close to being a successful person. Last I heard, she is living the life in another city at the start of a great career. She really dodged a bullet

>>725330216
For what it's worth, Upright base is dope. I guess the music industry is full of its uncertainties.

Jesus fucking Christ when I entered this thread I thought I wouldn't cry, but that I did.

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You don't have to agree with me here, but fuck it.

4chan is the website that most people say is the website full of people who go through the same things as you, and like the same things as you. But, to me, that's not always true. There's also other websites that certain people like, that also share interest with the users on those websites. Reddit, Twitter, Facebook, and yes, even Tumblr.

We may not like those websites because of the majority of people on those websites we hate. Feminists, idiots, cucks, and even more idiots. But, you have to understand, those people are people. They're bound to like what they like, just like us. Yes, they have beliefs that most of us, or maybe even the WORLD finds stupid, but at least they have someone to relate to. It's all the same with 4chan. We all have people to relate to.

We get to share our hardships, victories, and questions. We get to talk to actual people, no matter how much we hate them. Trust me, i hate feminists and the rest, but they have people to talk to at least. We all have someone to talk to, about depression, suicide, politics, religion, music, art, humanity, space, our solar system, and more.

We are all the same flesh and blood. We just have different skin, gender, and beliefs.

But we're all the same.

We're human.

Anybody watch that movie Logan? I kept hearing about how good/emotionally gripping it was.

I didn't feel moved a bit. This is concerning to me.

>>725330543
Here's a thought: don't be a codependent faggot.

Sitting at home in self-pity is a choice. Not doing or becoming anything is a choice. You don't have to have her in order to become a decent version of yourself, you just fool yourself into thinking that as a cop out.

>>725329441

I can relate to a few of these.

>>725330245
Geez man, I'm really sorry.

I watched my younger brother slowly deteriorate from cancer of the blood.
He was a cute, charming and happy little boy when he was 11 or so and by the time he was 12 he had gotten so absolutely fucked by chemo he could hardly walk. He didn't smile anymore after that, he just kept his head down and looked like he was about to pass out most of the time.

I remember on one of the last times I visited him, I was talking to him and he couldn't really make eye contact. His right eyelid kept drooping and his breaths would squeak and strain.

And when we sat down to play halo like we did when we were kids he could hardly hold the controller and couldn't really play.

God it really kills me to think of this stuff. I just miss him so much. I wish he were alive

>>725330492|
During last year I lost a lot of time playing quake and masterbating my assy to a dude I met on a weird chat... He was quite younger than me and never really cared, but I still miss and love him very much. What could I say? Im just a thirsty old lady~

does anyone else feel like killing themselves when threads 404

>>725330543
Yeah that's a long time so that could do it. It was only two years for me but this one seams to have really gotten into my heart for some reason. Been just over six months that she left me and ran off with someone else within less than a month. I'm glad I don't have access to heroin right now because I'd be seriously tempted. Sounds to me though like you need to stop hating yourself.

>>725331202
Yeah. It's like losing fifty close friends all at once.

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>>725331080
oh god

>>725326335
aw fuck man im crying stop it

>>725330975
hey thanks man great advice, this one I haven't thought about myself. I'm going to write this one down to read later

>>725330245
continuing
>fast forward 3 years
>sophmore year of high school
>brother is doing better, but still is introverted as hell
>turns out the apple doesn't fall far from the tree
>One day, go to church
>never had problem with it, and believed since I was a kid
>hear some pray-the-gay-away sermon
>don't know why, but that began me questioning God
>2 days later come home from work
>work a job to help pay the bills, but family is fairly financially stable
>come in to see my dad
>surprised, he normally works til 9pm
>turns out he was fired
>some fucking retard at US bank threw him under the bus for something he didn't do
>on his record as "fired for cause" now, making getting a job difficult
>one day, something clicked
>went downstairs, tied a noose and went for it
>about to pass out when my mother walks into my room
>screams and gets me down
>holds me for an hour, just crying
>start going to therapy 5 times a week
>heavy antidepressants every day
>While at therapy one day, find out there was a shooting at my brother's school
>he wasn't hurt, as it was a small af shooting, but I cry for hours
>my brother is still my only friend
>get through therapy, summer happens and all is good
>junior year
>finally start socializing
>become alpha af
>partying a lot and blowing off school
>one day ask out a chick
>works great
>two moths later though, she dumps me saying she never had feelings for me
>slept around a bunch, but I hadn't dated til her
>go home, drink heavily
>remember my dad has a gun
more to come

>>725331352
i love you guys, even though i dont know youu personally

>>725327135
Shit, now you're making me tear up. I have it, but the fucking size limits won't let me upload, and I can't find the USB stick where I had it. Fuck, I'm sorry for being useless...

>>725331493
You're loved too, anon.

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>>725324488
Just found out my ex already hooked up with a guy in his car last night. We were together for 3 years and We broke up 7 months ago. I still haven't moved on. I hate my life.

>>725331286
You are right anon. I don't like myself at all, inside and out

This makes me cry everytime i hear it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQgbxGI_mqE

>>725331802
Mine went out fucking the night after dumping me if it makes you feel any better. Then got engaged to someone else about a month after that. Yep.

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>>725331493
>>725331493

>>725331944
Why is that? I mean what standards are you holding yourself up to that would make you not like yourself?

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>>725327135
>>725331591
Not to worry fellas, hope the compression hasn't fucked it.

>>725331475
Bump, near to hear the end

>be me
>13
>met girl, didn't like her at all, fast forward to 16 and we're dating
>let's call her Sarah
>Find out she has a heart condition
>orly.jpg
>she shows me all the scars from surgery
>put simply, her heart her heart has one chamber, and two inlets
>eventually it will give out and she'll need a transplant, meaning immunology suppressants meaning a good ol' dose of Hodgkins lymphoma
>I love her and she's gonna die before she's 20 and there isn't shit I can do

What kills me the most is knowing I will never have a meaningful relationship with anyone, because every relationship that I've considered meaningful up until this point has ended.

>>725331591
It's ok anon :)

>>725332290
pretty much the standard of my peers

>>725332862
Same here but I just don't give a fuck anymore. Just going to work on my music and try to enjoy life's simple pleasures and maybe get a dog when I get older. Fuck it I tried.

>>725332344
I appreciate this anon thank you! i've been looking for it since I last read it. Real tear jerker haha

>>725331475
>can't take it anymore
>open field near my house
>go out to the field and scream and cry
>ask God why I have to provide for family at 16
>ask why literally everything goes wrong
>stared out into the infinity, no response
>chamber a round and put gun in mouth
>try to pull the trigger for 45min
>think about family, and how I felt when my brother tried to do it
>couldn't do that to him, even if he was now a completely different person
>go home and stay awake til the bus comes
>later, tell my parents
>get sent to a mental facility
>fight the whole way, cops had to put me on gurney
>couldn't say goodbye to family
>there for 2 days, didn't make eye contact with any staff
>spoke as little as I could
>2nd day my brother visits
>somehow he remembered my favorite food
>takes everything in me to not break down in front of him
>hug him for 10 min then we share the chicken wings
>finally get out

cont

>>725332855
Immuno suppressants not Immunology

>>725332995
Yeah you should set your own standard. Giving a fuck about what other people think doesn't help. I'm just working out what will make me relatively at peace the rest of my life. No keeping up with the joneses, in the world not of it. I think that shit never ends. It's never satiated if you keep thinking oh why is my life not like his or hers. I've been there done that and seen people do it and it just makes you miserable. Never mind what they've got or what they're doing what makes you happy? I don't know if that makes sense....

>>725332855
Give her your heart, literally

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none of you care but 7 years ago i was in love with two girls

the English girl won my heart though and the Dutch girl turned cold against me. i've had other loves since then, but you cant help but relive the past sometimes.

I see all that shit and I can feel but not real care. That's normal?

>>725333166
Final part sorry about length. Can't trust anyone with this. Ironic that I'm posting on /b/ tho

>don't tell friends, except one chick
>goes behind my back, tells most of my friends
>completely shut her out for 2 months
>not even eye contact
>eventually, at a party, she tries to talk to me
>flat out ignore her
>she goes crazy, starts hitting me
>bleeding, but I just let it happen
>eventually, she got pulled off me
>go home after
>laugh about it with my brother
>first time we've bonded since the hospital
>he's finally starting to regain his old self
>next morning
>getting texts from half the girls in my group
>apparently, its my fault that she fought me
>say i ruined the night
>angry, but not a petty guy
>make up with her
>she starts saying she suicidal
>try to help her
>til she told me for the 12th time in a week
>attentionwhore.png
>call her out, angry as hell that she's exploiting my past
>guys back me up
>girls don't
>fucking retards think since I confronted her, I caused it
>literally was told to make up with her and talk with her about my issues
>kicked out

That was last night. I keep telling myself to stay strong for my brother. Gets harder every minute. I want to just rehermit up and go back to being beta, but I know my brother is trying to follow my example. He doesn't remember I was the one who made him go to that school where he got fucked up. How can I live with myself knowing he's living up to someone who is so dragged down by all this shit. I hope if I do it, he will understand

Forgot to mention in green text, but my dad finally got a decent job. Most likely gonna sure US bank

>>725333522

Nobody really cares about anything or anyone.

>>725329441
im the same

>>725333328
I understand what you're saying and I appreciate it

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i love you guys

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>>725329679
The dog is my mind,
And the drone is /b/

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>>725333786

>>725333858
Love you too anon <3

OC.

Grandmother and grandfather together for 50 years.
She started showing signs of alzheimers at 53 years old.
He had a stroke several years later - unable to care for her, she was put in an old folks home.
Two months from stroke, he died.
Had to go tell her that her husband was dead
Next 10 hours is her remembering that her husband was dead for about 20 minutes, then she would forget
Just to remember again that her husband was dead

Dunno why, but it was especially painful watching that cycle. Every time she remembered she'd just scream "he's gone he's gone"

I feel like if I could get off of drugs and stay clean, I could salvage my life and still make something of myself to be somewhat pleased with.. but kicking the habit is hard as fuck when it's all you've known for the past two and a half years.

>used to enjoy imagining where I would be in the future
>can no longer picture myself living past 30

Just don't care anymore lads

I have kind of a feel story that I've never told before. Didn't happen to me, but it's about one of my closest friends.

>be me in highschool
>steven was my best friend
>had a huge crush on him
>we told each other everything
>we fall out over some point about something stupid
>few years later we're back at it again
>even closer now
>he was born in vietnam
>talks about his little brother and thinking about his little sister
>I've met his little brother
>but he's never mentioned his sister
>he's a huge troll
>loves to bullshit me
>"fuck off steven, you don't have a sister"
>"yes i do anon, haven't I told you about her?"
>"you're absolutely fucking with me, we've known each other for years, you don't have a sister haha"
>turns out he did have a sister
>his grandmother was babysitting his 8 month old sister
>grandmother put her down on the couch on her back
>little sister throws up
>drowns in her own vomit
>mfw I laughed at steven for saying he had a sister
>literally laughed in his face about it
>we'd known each other for 6 years and it never came up
>no wonder he has a mental blockade the size of the fucking great wall of china

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Fug.

I'm getting off this thread right now and giving my parents a hug.

I don't even give a shit that they're probably asleep.

>>725334416

I need a hug, you son of a bitch.

>>725334557
>Hugs you

>>725334251
to be with someone so long is a blessing. to be seperated after all that time, i cant imagine the pain.

just try to remember that such a long time together is rare. that time they had together is precious. What can you learn from their experience?

op here, said it like 4 times but i love you guys

>>725325800
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BdLC59m6xe0

> here, yesterday was my first day at ambulance, the third case was a women, we got called because she wasn't breathing well
>we made it to the house In like five min
>she hadn't breathe in ten minutes or so
>we had to declare her dead
>as we speak, a women enters, sees me in the eyes and I could see her broken heart as she said with tears "I had her apples"
>I won't forget that look

>>725334814
Dunno, but I am terrified I'll end up with alzheimers. 53 is wayyyy early onset.

Think if it comes to that, I'd want to off myself immediately.

>>725324488
any1 just gotta sad music thread. havent cried in days.

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Posting some OC

>be me
>Dad walks Dogs
>Dogs are my best friends
>always there for me when I needed them
>take them for granted, I wanted real human friends
>was a weird kid, so I didn't have any
>Dogs all die as I get older
>still don't have friends, mostly because of depression
>realize that the dogs were more human the any human could ever be

>>725335108

I am more or less hoping that within the next 30-50 years, almost all mental health problems are effectly reversible.

That's faith for you.

>>725333166
cont please

>>725335371
look thru thread, posted the rest

going to sleep, thank you guys for posting, op signing off

>>725335141
This one does it for me. Don't know if it will for you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zifVvT17LPA

>>725335495
Good night OP. Stay gold you beautiful bastard.

>>725335495
Good night OP. Sweet dreams

>>725335495
Goodnight, sweet dreams, rest well OP

>>725328753
I was waiting for it.

>>725335108
if youre anywhere near that age youre far ahead of me in numbers. Human experience is vast i'd be searching for answer on the big questions. i wont except that we're lost without answers so early on.

My grandad died choking on an orange at the age of 79. Despite his dementia, he went about his daily routine with a kind of confidence that I lack in my youth. I want to be at the place where my grandad was. I want to get to heaven.

>>725333009
Kim, is that you?

>Be me in high school
>Very few friends
>Lost almost all of my friends in the past so most people I called "friends" I generally have only known for less than a year
>Can't trust anyone because every group of friends I've had has thrown me under the bus or used to beat me up for fun
>Only friends with my school friends because I thought it was better than being alone
>Best friend is the only person I have trusted for a long time
>Never hide anything from him and he never hides anything from me
>Early in our friendship he moved far away but we still texted frequently
>He got a girlfriend and stopped texting me as much
>I'm fine with it because I'd probably do the same
>Him and his girlfriend argue a lot
>I stay up all night on a threeway call helping them out so they don't potentially break up
>This started happening on a weekly basis
>One day when we're talking he tells me how depressed he was before meeting me and how glad he is to have become friends with me
Fast forward to September of last year
>Age 20 now
>We're still talking a lot but I notice that he's becoming more and more distant
>Tells me he and his girlfriend have stopped arguing as much now
>I'm really glad about it and think our friendship could go back to how it was before
>Messages me less and less
>Not sure why
>By mid october he almost entirely stops messaging me aside from one text a week
>This carries on for a few months
>Get to last month (February)
>Finally ask him what's going on
>He stays silent and doesn't say anything for over 2 weeks.
>Finally get a message from him.
>He gets really angry about it
>Tells me I'm annoying
>Try my best to salvage the friendship because he's the only person I've been able to trust
>Eventually get a message from him
"I'm happy now and I don't need you anymore"
>Stops responding to any of my messages
>Removed me from all forms of social media we shared
>Realize I'm completely on my own again
>Cry

I guess this is just me being a whiny bitch but it hurts.

>>725336113
Nope! Guess I'm not the only one. Hahah.

>>725324488
Thanks OP i wanted to fap guess ill just go to sleep now

>>725332202
>>725331802
Fuckin hell, I feel ya bros. My ex cheated on me for months, and ran off with the dude when I finally caught her after digging through her facebook and phone for a month.

She went official with him a fuckin' week later.
It was August when that happened, and it's still not going away.

Then I got the runaround from some other chick who acted really interested, then did a complete 180 on everyone. Me included.

Women are fuckin' nuts.

Lets talk about our feeling

3475005042

>>725336277
Hey, fuck him and his needle dick. You're in a place of love. Idiots like him think they've found happiness, but true euphoria is unobtainable. He'll come crawling back as soon as he realizes his girlfriend isn't everything he thought she was, and it may kill you inside, but you have to tell him to fuck off.

sorry for the blog post just need to get this off my chest

>life shit, but not too shit
>poor af, but barely managed
>spent time with family because I was awkward
>extremely depressed alot of the time, but didn't tell anyone because we can't afford any help
>didn't kill self because I didn't want to be selfish to family
>family is now either dead or somewhere else
>still in same home with same walls
>just drink myself to sleep or workout or work
>nothings stopping me, but I can still hear dad playing music in the livingroom
>still hear mom laughing at brothers jokes
>and I cry myself to sleep
I just want to be happy again

>>725326111
DUDE WTF I'VE READ THAT STORY THOUSAND OF TIMES AND I'M CRYING

>>725336664
I won't have to worry about that actually. He cut off every form of connection with me, and he moved to a different country a long while ago.

>>725334947
i have a 28 gauge. i shoudl buy rounds for it. itd make a good ceremonial death.

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>touched sister some when kids
>although never directly confronted about it by anyone in family the guilt is immense and I hate myself for it
>gf of 4 years
>do weird, perverted shit behind her back to simulate relationship with sister
>also don't see any point in anything and probably schizo

Kill me now

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>>725324488
I love my yonger sister (12) but she's just a fucking jerk... she mocked me for being ugly, told me I'm one of the most disgusting looking boys she's ever seen and told me I must hate my life being this ugly. She didn't say it in a apologetic way, as she was laughing in my face. I know that I'm ugly, and I've learned to live with it, but I hate when people give me shit for shit I can't change. Little shit like this fucking gets to me. I get that she's a kid but come the fuck on. I never point out some of her various flaws and am a good brother but she just decides to pull stupid shit like this.

Fuck me I feel really fucking bad at myself. I'm fucking hideous.

>>725337530
Leave for a day or 2 clear your head how old are you because if you can drive do so drive somewhere chill and relax

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>>725337530
This is some reddit/tumblr tier normie shit my friend.

>>725337530
Post face, I'll be the judge of that. You're probably fine. Little girls don't know shit.

>>725325740
too close home

>>725337530
You can't be that ugly, post selfie

>>725337530
dont worry anon, your beautiful on the inside. record your day with her and then beat her ass the next day. when your parents catch you, show her all the mean and hateful things she said to you.

I've started cutting myself again.

I'm 27, dating a great girlfriend and have 2 sweet dogs but I am so monumentally depressed that I have to either release it somehow or I'm going to an hero.

I've had to hid it from her which has not been easy considering I live with her. I just can't stop doing it. when I cut I get a huge rush of endorphins and for a little while I don't want to kill myself. I usually just cut and rub the cuts to make myself bleed longer. then I shower and continue rubbing them with a wash cloth to make it sting and burn under scalding hot water. I then like to finish of by going at them with 90% alcohol.

I can't tell her because I don't want to stop, and I'm afraid of losing her if she ever found out how depressed and suicidal I am. I have no one to talk to about it and I don't really want to talk to anyone about it or get help. Who wants to be a fucking burden like that?

How could I go up to a friend and say "hey I know I generally laugh and joke a lot, but sometimes I spend hours sitting in my room in the dark slowly dragging a scalpel across my body until I get a release from the crushing isolation I feel on a daily basis. I do this mostly to stop from hanging myself or blowing my god damn brains out. Hope this doesn't fuck up our friendship."

And what would it accomplish? I don't want to stop anyway

>>725337530
Fake suicide to teach her a lesson

>>725338000
Trips have spoken. Hot damn!

Come to this thread >>725336112

>>725338000
Fucking this except actually kill yourself you fucking fag

>>725336611
That they are. Nothing feels quite like that knife in the back. The one mine ran off with was some random fuck she added to facebook months before who she told me not to worry about then lied about having deleted him. It just killed me to think what a trusting idiot I'd been and how I was vilified as being some possessive monster if I got suspicious. Manipulative little cunt.

>>725337530
dude my 13 year old sister is 10x cooler than i was.

when i was rocking out to to fuckin DJ Kutsky, she's listening to chance the rapper. level up thats all i got to say.

>>725337530
post face

>>725338095
Mine knew this guy before, he came back into the state and suddenly she was all about him

I'd always suspected it but had never been able to catch her on it until the end, after that it was excuse after excuse

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>>725337758
I'm 19

I just don't understand why the fuck it is she targets me when I never do anything to her. I try to protect her, teach her, and guide her through lots of the stuff she deals with including staying up late helping her with homework. I want nothing but the best for her... but sometimes she just fucking targets me for no reason. Call me a fucking loser for getting my feelings hurt by a kid, I don't care. It's too real to me.

I was just helping her with homework just now and suddenly she just decides to tell me I'm an ugly piece of shit that should feel bad. I mean, what the fuck?
>>725337902
>>725337933
>>725338254

I'm ugly. I've posted myself on /b/ enough, get memed everytime.

>>725338091
Fuck that, the little bitch needs to learn her lesson. Anon, just start being real despondent for a week, then leave a note and leave the house for a motel for a bit. Kids today have grown up with cyber bullying so I hope to God she can realize it's her fault you "killed" yourself.

>>725325930
Holy shit I'm not the only one...

>I was raised by a single mom
>She works full time
>I spend all my time taking care of my younger brother
>He eventually is old enough to take care of himself.
>He's 16 and has friends now
>I'm 21 and spent most of my life raising him and have no friends outside of work
>I go to "hangout with friends" so my mom doesn't worry about me...

>>725338485
Why can't they just fucking admit it? Why do they feel the need to string us along like that and twist the knife? God they're such cunts. It's like when you catch a kid with it's hand in the cookie jar and they still deny it.

>>725338597
Where do you go to "hangout with friends"

>>725338512
Guy, I look like a shapeless sack of meat. Even if these faggots meme you, I'll give honest criticisms and be supportive.

>>725338694
Cheating hoes will always be cheating hoes.

She'll get sick of him and go crawling off to the next guy that will put up with her shit.

Until she finds she's burned all her bridges, and has no one left.

>>725324488
I feel bad for you if you actually enjoy this fucking shithole, newfriend. At least go to better boards.

>>725325740
i saw this the other day. still love vidya, specially For Nonor

>>725338901
Yeah she got engaged to him with in a month of just plopping herself into his place and living with him. Makes me wonder just how much of a cuck he must be to just accept all that that fast. I mean he probably has no idea of her past or anything. It just seams so utterly retarded and surreal. And they both have kids to top it off. Kids raising kids. What a fucked up world.

>>725325825
thanks

>>725333565
Mate just pretend its ok with her and dont give her much credit.If she talks to you just pretend everything is fine and let her win the cup you dont need more drama.
Just remember that probably there isn't anything after death so its better just enjoy it, even if barely than not existing at all. Now that feeling is scary as fuck to me

>>725338512
Two thing i can suggest

>suicide
>or never help her or really make basic contact

>>725336664
>>725336825
This.
And he will add you back dont worry, make your move now and block him now. Or actually don't. Let him come for you then laugh on that little shit's face and tell him to kys. And if he says his gf made him do it tell him he made his choice. Np

>>725336719
Just do or find something you like, getting out the house helps tbh, atleast for me. Remember that its your life and you decide what you wanna do with it and don't try to live up to what other people find normal. You do you and they do them. Hope this helps somehow.

Fuck, life sucks.
I'm probably the least qualified person to say that.
But just having material things isn't enough to keep my happy sometimes.
I've got no foreseeable future.
And I'm pretty sure I'm the least liked out of all of my friends.
They just keep me around to have someone to laugh at.
I can never talk without being called a "weirdo".
And when I leave they always come back and apologize.
And it seems so sincere that I want to keep them around.
I fucking suck at everything I do, and sometimes I feel as if I'll never get better...

>>725338512
Definitely not saying to kill yourself to show her a lesson, start ignoring her so she understands all you do for her.

>>725338778
I usually go drive to the nearest city and people watch. I've always been curious how other people's lives work. Sometimes I just drive around aimlessly or I'll sit outside a coffee shop.

>>725324488
terrified of sex, yet hormones are like "oh look a girl YOU NEED TO FUCK HER RIGHT NOW"

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Good luck everyone, love you all

>>725339039
i legit feel bad for every newfag who starts visiting this shithole even to just lurk

>>725329441
where in NY?

>>725340705
need some advice?

>>725340705
What's to be scared of?

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>>725326299
I giggled and cried a little at the same time. I've never done that before in my life. Thanks.

>>725340705
Why would you be terrified of sex? please explain

>>725329441
mate where in ny, the city makes a body feel down.

>>725336611
Same.
Dated a girl for four years, she was heavy into drinking and drugs when I met her. Cleaned her up, helped her get through college with a degree. Was gonna propose when she graduated.
FF to 4 months before her graduations, she dumps me. Stays at her only other friends place. I basically have ring paid, everything. Find out that hours after she dumped me, she became official with said friend. And that shed been sleeping with him for months before that.

Dated her friend for half a week after that, but she couldnt have that and destroyed that relationship for me.

Its been 13 months since her breakup, and a full year almost since the breakup from her friend. Still havent recovered from it. In the meantime shes still with the kid all happy, and her friend had a bf, dumped him, but did not want to get back together because shes mad at how my ex ended us and blames me.

>>725334289
I'm trying
I'm trying
I don't want to remember today as another day I fell off the wagon
But the day I decided not too

>>725327841
ouch
that one hurt

>>725326335
That ending made me chuckle

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This one always gets me

>>725334289
i kicked a habit of about 8 years. you can do it anon

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Anyone?

>>725338512
post a selfie, this is a feels thread

>>725341500
That's the thanks you get for helping her out. I saved my one from a suicide attempt too. This is the problem with these damaged bitches though. You can't fix them or more to the point you can't trust them.

>>725329679
what really kills me, is thinking about how I will never be able to experience growing up from a parent's and grandparent's perspectives.

>>725327841
This made me laugh.

>>725340811
>>725340815
>>725341160
Don't know really...
sophomore in high school and feel fucking tons of pressure to get it on, tons of friends are doing it
one of my friends is trying to hook me up with someone but I don't really want to
i just feel too young to do something like that, and the shitstorm it might cause is just not worth it...

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>>725341879
too much effort to crop out the ifunny?

>>725327135
Hope he found the fucker and raped him

>>725329441
You wouldn't have HIV if you weren't a weak-willed whore

>>725333565
Good luck.

>>725333565
hey man, i love you. stay strong. fuck them, you're great and us on this shit earth are lucky to have you.

>>725342086
bro don't even sweat it you got plenty of time

>>725341937
I guess; truth be told thats what hurt more than anything. The fact that I 180d her life, basically salvaged it for her and made her such a better person for it, that she could turn around and pull that shit. After the breakup she would tell me she owes her life to me... Well... lol

>>725326147
He's been crushed under a truck and his name is Hobocrunch.
I didn't know this was a YLYL thread.

>>725342350
Hah! My one said the exact same thing. Well...indeed! Fuck man never take them seriously. One thing I find weird is just how I feel a lot darker after all that. It makes me realize that at times a few years ago when I thought I was becoming a bit jaded how I hadn't seen anything yet.

>>725325592
Holy fucking shit. Feelsbad

>>725329441
If you do have it you deserve it. Only someone fucking retarded or who doesn't care about their life or health would have unprotected sex.

>>725342086
Its just sex dont sweat it, i never understand how people get nervous about it, i remember first time i fingered a girl and i was like 18, lost my virginity at 19 to a girl i dated and i was never nervous or anxious i'd be made fun of for being late. If people make fun of you for being a virgin just tell them to take a step back and realize what the fuck they're saying, litterally no one gives a fuck who's a virgin or not mind your own fucking business retards.
Fucking teenagers act like 12yos sometimes lmao

There's no other place in the world that shows the true humanity in men and women.

>>725325592
What a great gift to know he loved you that much.

Congrats, anon.

>>725342086
>sophomore
>high school
:D
MODS

>>725342672
truthfully Im happy she did it. At least it happened wen i was 22 not down the line, plus it gave me the opportunity I have now to pursue things I could not have with her, such as pursuing a possible med school where I am originally from. Truth be told I gave up a lot to be with her and compromised on what I wanted out of a woman, but know now I will only settle for the woman I want.

I wanted to tell you I love you but my last words were "good luck". I hope you're okay.

>>725343088
kek whats wrong with being in hs

>>725337979
be free anon. do what you want as long as you stay on this earth with us. we dont judge you for cutting, and anyone who cant accomodate you is not someone you need.

>>725342949
this helps
thx anon, always there for us

I used to be sad, but something in me clicked. Now I don't cry. Instead, I laugh. I hate myself and I try to tell others, but the other me says no, don't make others worry. I'm afraid of myself. I am afraid I might kill. I've made an arsenal of different weapons and grow my own belladonna. I want to kill, but other me says no. It's all so stupid I can't help but laugh. What else can I do?

>>725324488
I don't want to die, I just want to stop existing.

>>725343409
Yeah it's easier when you're younger. You still have your whole life ahead of you. I'm middle aged so I've got the whole how the fuck did I get here and what do I do with where I've found myself thing going on. It's been a weird trip.

>>725325910
Wow. Heartbreaking.

>>725343714
sorry to hear that mate; hope you get passed it though and find the one for you who isnt a complete whorebag-preferably one that doesnt need fixing

I just wish that some day I'll be happy. I want to be happy over something. Someone to hold, care for. Only if I hadn't fucked things up in the past I might have been happy

>>725342086
im a freshman, ive already had sex, and i still dont know whether i regret it or not. all i can say anon is that you need to wait, find the right person, and then everything will be okay.

go ahead and fucking ban me, but just know i love all of you.

>>725344109
Yeah. A dog! They're loyal at least. Hahah.

>>725344172
you have a tiny dick

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When you come on /b/ to jerk off, but end up reading feels stories and crying at 1 in the morning. Thanks anons

>>725344477
i love you.

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someone pls hug me

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>>725345065
no

Every single day as I walk to where I need to go I think about all the times I fucked up. How I've ruined my body with food and alcohol, fucked my lungs from 5+ years of smoking. How I've pushed people away and burnt bridges. I barely come out of my room now. The people I live with in this house rarely see me and even when they do I don't talk. Used to be great friends with them but now feel like mere acquaintances. As I'm lying in bed watching the sun come up the thought of how easily it would be to end it all now. No one would miss me, no one would even care.

I'm not scared or sad anymore, not even tired. Just empty

>>725329441
>>725330216
Anon, I don't know if you're in the city, but I'm a first responder here. I hope that we never have to meet outside of /b/, since I never get called for anything good, and it breaks my heart a little bit each time to see it happen.

1-888-NYC-WELL and 1-800-273-TALK. You can also call 311 if you're in the city. Please, if you feel you're on the brink, call them, before somebody has to call me.

>>725337530
My li'l sis is the exact opposite. She adores me and loves me so much it hurts quite literally. She always likes to play rough and ends up swinging on my hair like a vine.

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>>725345065

>>725325910
Damn, if thats a real story, thats fucking awful

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>>725345337
lol thanks 4 bein gay

>>725345337
who records this shit

>>725327135
When she said that the police can't "Un-rape" her. I could only think about the FBI tip screenshot with one of the joke tabs being "How to un-rape your sister"

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>you will never have this

how does that make you feel, anon?

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>>725326299

>>725345845
Good. I don't want anyone in my life, I just want to be left alone.

>>725345604
np its 2 in the morning and i tried to kill myself a week or so ago so id be lying if i said i was above acting a little gay

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>>725345845
My fantasies allow me to though

>>725329679
This>>725329679

>>725334415
Shoulda laughed at the vomit bit to see how he would react

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>>725346152

it fucking sucks that listening to some of your favourite music reminds you of the memories you had with the one you love because you know you won't be able to experience those memories anymore because they cut you out of their life.

>>725345201

Bra make little changes but stick with em and you'll make it.

>>725346499
sorry anon sometimes its for the best

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>>725336719
> I can still hear dad playing music in the livingroom
>still hear mom laughing at brothers jokes

>>725345845
Please, I want this so badly. If there's a God or any higher beings. Please, let me have this. I want someone to love and hold and know that they'll always be there for me and I'll always be there too. Please.

>>725346499
I don't just get that with music. I get it with everywhere I walk in my routines. I find the most ridiculous things remind me of her. I wrote a letter of sorts about it to go with the music I'm writing. Maybe you can relate maybe not but here it is.

Dear Ghost

I wake up in the morning and there you are. Here with me always, I cannot touch you and you do not respond. Alone I walk further into the abyss each day and ever more heavy does my heart grow. These places that I walk through are haunted. The howling winds and desolate sounds of sirens and traffic run through my being.
The days of sunshine and carefree nights of timelessness have been replaced with grinding drudgery and the crawling of time on and endless sea at the darkest hour of the night. There I drift further away but with me you stay , a dark cloud shadowing me. A train of memories chugging along further and further away into the long night . I wander still as my body aches with the growing weariness of existence. Yet I do not want you to stop possessing me for you are the only shred of company I have left even if I am only chasing phantoms. The days are gruelling as I perform my mundane tasks and the nights close in on me as I lie awake with exasperation. I await the day when you finally drift away into the vapour of the air but a long time prisoner always fears liberation. Ghost who haunts my heart you are all I have left.

>>725325592
That put a tear to my eye.

>>725345845
I did.


Wish I could have kept it tho.

>>725346977
I feel you there anon. For what it's worth, I hope you get to find someone you love and are able to hold like that.

>>725342371
FUCK YOU NOT NOW

>>725347375
Thank you.

>>725333565
dude there isnt enough time in the world to deal with all these hoes, fuck them, just hang out with ur bros and ur brother till things get better

i just moved to a new city 550 miles away from where i used to live, im 20 years old havent had to make friends since you know high school, kept the two good friends i had up until now, now i just feel socially awkward and depressed because i dont know how to go make friends, im 20, i cant ust go to a bar or whatever, im not really sure what to do.

>be me
>17 move to colorado for work
>first time leaving home
>miss my family
>most of all miss my dog i grew up with
>raised her from a puppy loved her more than anything
>shes 12 has some health problems
>coming home for christmas in 2 weeks
>dog is getting sicker coughing a lot
>vet gives a cough suppresant
>health improves until cough medicine runs out
>5 days till i come home
>dog goes back to vet for chest xrays
>2 days until i come home
>results are back
>lungs are filling with liquid
>breathing is getting hard
>nothing they can do
>dog has to be put down
>1 day until i come home
>dog gets put down
>i almost got to say good bye

>>725341724
same kinda ruined it

>>725346977

I'm married, about to be divorced. I'm jaded but still hopeful.

You will have this. It will come naturally. Can't force it. The more you focus on self improvement, doing your own thing, the rest will fall in line.

Always have hope. Life is pointless and meaningless. Do whatever the fuck you want forever.

>>725329679
i love you too dudre

>>725348500
Same, where you at my man?

>>725345845
as if anyone is actually that sweet and loving.

>>725333858
dude i fucking love you so much

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>>725349861
630, what about u bro?

>>725348500
I feel you so fucking hard man. So fucking hard. I did manage to make some great friends though but their lives before college were way more interesting than my life. I came from a small high school and led a very quiet life and dated only one girl during my whole stay at high school. She ended up breaking up with me and it pretty much destroyed my whole world. I didn't bother growing to prom because I let myself go and felt ugly, I ended up getting fat from depression. I look at my friends old facebook photos, and they all come from big schools and it kills me on the inside. Their proms looked lots of fun and they all seemed happy.
Now I have lost all of that weight and I have gotten into meaningless flings, but they all reminded me of how lonely I really am. I guess what I am getting at is, how do you deal with this feel /b/? that feeling of missing out on life. I know that I should focus on making up on lost time, but I am always drowning in fucking schoolwork and it gets in the way of meeting new people and making great experiences. What do guys? Despite that I said I was fairly quiet during high school, it was because I was in a relationship and it was during a rough time too. I am naturally a social person, but its killing me on the inside that everyone's out there having a great time but I'm stuck here trying to grind it out. I know this sounds like bitching, but honestly, I feel very stuck. Any suggestions are welcome guys.

>>725350142
Damn, 828. Like 10 hours away

The three years I spent with her were the best years of my life. I miss laying in bed talking for hours, the gaze in her eyes when she posed in photos, playing shitty video games, and writing her cheesy love poems. Everything was care free, we were perfect for each other. It's like she changed overnight, I knew something wasn't right, I knew it was over and cried in her arms. I'll never forget our final kiss. She cut me off from her life soon after, blocked me from everything. It's been two years since and I wrote a message for her the other day, but I never sent it. I get the feeling she's cyber stalking me which is fine, it's actually comforting to know, but I wish she'd make the first move.

>>725325592
This hit home, tbh...

>>725325740
LITERALLY me right now

>>725340645
no social connections or anything? damn anon

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>>725325592

jesus

>My baby mama's dad, sister and cousin told me the other day that I'm the better parent out of the two of us, and that they don't like the new boyfriend.
>I can't even lie, as psycho as my baby mama is, I still look at pictures of her and think about what could've been
>In other news, I've realized that my best female friend is probably my soul mate, except she's in a(n unhappy) relationship, but I don't want to do the dude dirty, because I've been done dirty like that before myself.
I'll probably just stay forever alone, or at least alone for awhile.

>>725348500
I moved about 1,000 miles for a woman once. I pretty much made friends through work.

>>725334395
this

>>725328102
If it makes you feel better I applied for on the one college I wanted into and got admission. xd

>>725347203
same

>>725352131
>>725347203

What'd you guys enjoy most about her?

>>725333448

Its god damn hard.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fhucOWgDA4E

>>725352348
His arms.

They're the only chains that could keep me anchored.

>>725352697
Anchored is a perfect word. Safe at bay.

If you dont mind I ask, how long have you been separated?

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I was married 20 years. 2 kids, dogs, house, everything. Helped support my wife through her disability our whole relationship. I didn't realize, due to my youth, that I was enabling her victim attitude. That progressed to her emotionally tearing me apart when she got mad, as it was her coping mechanism. I had enough and tried to leave. She finally got the hint and promised to treat me better. I also joined the military to improve my own self esteem, now shattered.

I got a spine, and she didn't like that. She reverted back to tearing me apart, but now in front of the kids. The oldest, a teenager, sides with mom.

I'm out of the military, and taking care of the whole house, now that wife is really disabled. Oldest child is showing symptoms of same disability now. I tell wife to stop. I plead with wife to stop, for sake of the kids. Won't stop, says she's not even doing anything wrong. It's all my fault instead.

I have enough, and try to leave. Wife files a protection order against me, saying I abused them. Even says i did sexual abuses to daughter. I'm fFloored.

TFW I can't even tell my children that I still love them.

>>725353023
The saddest thing is it hasn't even been a couple months and I've already lost track of the exact number.

>>725353031

How old is your oldest now?

Me and my Girlfriend of 2+ years recently separated, and I feel like dying. It was a toxic relationship but I just want to go back to her, and I can't. I burnt that bridge, and so did she. I want to Die. I can't sleep, because I'm depressed. But all I want to do is sleep, cause I'm depressed.

/r/ing the greentext of an anon who killed his dog since the dog was in pain and approaching death

>>725336611
Trent?

>>725345845
But I will. I'm meeting her for the first time in about 12 hours.

>>725353197
16

>>725353153

And yet I'm guessing it feels like only yesterday you were there, you could still embrace it in your head.
I share the feels with you, friend. It's the worst and best emotions all at the same time.

>>725353463
>I'm meeting her for the first time in about 12 hours
That's awesome anon, I hope it's wonderful and everything goes smoothly.

>>725353675
>>725353031

Me too. I'm also the guy with the sob story there. She's going through her own hell, similar to mine, so we relate really well.

Gotta keep fighting, I suppose.

>>725353966
Damn I miss my kids though.

>>725325876
Y'all mind if i relate way too much?

>>725353529

I know it means nothing, coming from a stranger across the internet, but I grew up in a similar situation. What I know is that even though your wife may not learn the lesson and treat you with the respect you deserve, kids are different.
Adulthood opens perspectives, and if they're as smart as their Dad, they'll come back to you. Just the patience game, /b/rother.

I don't want to fall in love. Because I'm afraid of falling out of it. The only think that keeps me from pursuing women is the fact that they might leave me

>>725345845
Ive had it
And im colder for it

Believe me anons, youre not missing anything. Stay as bad as you are, vecause eventually, this will always make you worse

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>>725325740
>>725337903
>>725350706
>Rescue your dead father.
For more information:
https://www.youtube.com/user/JordanPetersonVideos

>>725354482

You dont consider yourself stronger for it?

>>725354283
Sir ( Fuck yeah I assumed your gender!), it does mean something to me. Thank you. I shall keep the faith and keep patient.

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>>725354283

This is true. My mom fucked over my Dad hard when my brother and I were kids and lied about everything that ever crossed her mind to distort. We just spent xmas with him and his new wife. My mom will only ever get a quick phone call.

Everyone reaps what they sow, eventually. Stay strong and play it smart.

>>725354575
I never wanted to be stronger
I just wanted to be me
But i dont know how to be me anymore, that part of me died with it
Strength or not, im not happy, and im afraid to try and be happy again

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>>725353031
Holy shit are you me???

I ended up with the kids because I was better suited to take care of them being she was disabled don't give up on those kids, we have to show them what real men are like.

>>725340705
Same here. The reason for me is something stupid as fuck. I was Bornaments out of wedlock and at the time my dad was a crazy druggie or my mom was just a bitch. anyways though she forces him out of our lives. She also decided to not circumcise me. So I grew up without a dad and without someone to reach me how to take care of my forskin. Now I'm 18 and I've only ever pulled my forskin back once. My dick is purple and has literally only seen the light of day once, pulling it back almost made Me pass out. I did that a year ago and I've been too scared to try again since. Basically I have sme disease where my forskin is fucked up so when I first fuck a girl I will blead from my dick and it will hurt a fuck ton. My chances to find a Virgin are low as shit since I've constantly failed in relationships. One goodles thing is that imy pretty sure if I wear a condom it won't happen though. I'm basically doomed to never have sex bareback or to bleed from myou dick the first few times I have sex which all will probably be with non virgins. I have no idea what a woman would think in that situation

>>725354664

Haha, damn right soldier!

My mum kept me separate from my dad for all of my child/teenagehood. I lived a normal life, with a good step-dad, and yet I don't think I'll ever know who I am until I know who my dad was and bring him back into my life.
So I'll search for him. When I'm ready. When he's ready.

She'll search for you when she's ready.

>>725354803

^ Mah nigga

>>725354803
Thanks anon, I shall.