Feels thread

>>724950121
If that's how you feel then fucking man up and get a job faggot ass pussy

>>724950121
Hiya op,hows life?

I have no fucking motivation and I feel drained all the time lads. All my friends tell me I'm depressed but I know I'm not.

My freinds group in school is about to splinter and I have no fallback as I was naive as fuck when I was young and thought it would last forever. The group is full of fucking borderline autistic nerds and over the last year we've hardly went out. I have hobbies and shit I can do on the weekends but it doesn't really do the trick of going out with friends.

The one girl I was close with who was into me hasn't text me since November and I miss her even though I pushed her away.

My younger brother is making the same mistakes that I did but 100* worse.

I come home from studying after school and sleep now, I'm turning up late to all my classes and sleeping in through morning registration and spending more and more time alone. I don't even enjoy playing video games anymore.

I want her back. I want a decent friends group and I want my brother to sort himself out but I don't know where to begin and it's been like this for so long now that I don't even feel like I care anymore, I've always been laid back but this isn't laid-back, this is giving up.

I want to know how to fix it, this isn't me and I fucking hate it. I don't know where to start though.

Summer's coming up, 11 weeks of break and I have a feeling most of it will be spend inside, alone unless I can figure out how to help myself. I'm scared anons.

Posting here because the /adv/ thread keeps saying connection error.

>>724951358

It isnt that. Its just that feels threads make me, y'know...FEEL (which i like)

>>724951401

Life is going okay i guess, just overthinking a few things

>>724951537
Well thats me....
Feels bad op,knowing that youre wasting the best years of your life...

>>724951614
Glad to hear that op,keep your chin up!

>>724951737
Yep. Everyone else is out partying and I'm here fucking sleeping all day because I have fuck all else to do and I don't know how to meet new people and form new social groups.

>>724951537
get your fucking chin up and start working on your life anon

>>724952012
Thats why I'm an heroing in the morning at 06:47

File: 1469579641733.jpg (115KB, 900x635px) Image search: [Google]

115KB, 900x635px

>>724952255
You can't go back, bud, but you can go forward.

>>724951537
An Hero before it gets any worse.

>>724952467
I can't
Tomorrow is my birthday,at 6:47 I was born,on 6:47 I will die.Kinda poetic,I guess?

File: 1469581811061.png (1MB, 1680x1050px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 1680x1050px

>>724952819
How old are you? What's your story?

File: 1469567666033.png (63KB, 728x317px) Image search: [Google]

63KB, 728x317px

Slowly running out, if anyone wants to chip in.

File: 1469576477199.jpg (84KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

84KB, 500x500px

Anyone lurking?

>>724950121
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6LWybzPBC0

>>724952978
>1993, War torn Bosnia
>be me
>be born
>dad dies before I was born
>Mom gets shot when I was only 1
>she left me a letter where she wrote about how I will have a bright future
>get raised in foster homes,wasnt physically abused but it wasnt good
>had one friend in elementary school that died from cancer
>no friends in high school
>never got into college
>start drinking to forget
>get on welfare
Decide to man up and end it. I dont even have any clothes,I have nothing. Its better to end myself than to suffer,I guess?
I just feel like I dissapointed my mom and dad...

I wish i had friends that don't forget about me the day after i meet them

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndPEQqqURXU

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=COqx-TCxrSk

>>724953699
Any prospects of a job, even a couple of hours a week? Or a community college?
I'm from Ireland, so I can't say I know much about the place.

>>724953699
if thats true, i wish i could hug you to end the pain u feel

>>724953948
We have a really high unemployment rate so basically no chance. I've looked into everything. The only way I made money is by playing guitar on the street but now I can barely get sober to do that
>>724954014
I would hug you too,internet stranger

>>724952240
I'm studying endlessly and learning languages to get out of here. I'm trying new things in my spare time but nothing seems to do it. I'm gonna focus on my diet first, I was seeing decent results and now I'm putting on fat for the first time in years.

I was just venting there. I am trying but I'm just scared and unsure anon, there's no easy path and I'm afraid that I'm stuck here even though I know it'll work out.

File: 1245357485467456.jpg (117KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

117KB, 1280x720px

>>724954376
Sounds like you need a fresh start.

>>724954376
How are the Balkans anon? I've always wanted to go, I'm taking up Serbian or Bosnian soon so I can visit and fit in a bit more than most people. I love the countries histories and landscape but I honestly don't know that much about them.

>>724953699
Don't do it anon.

You take all those feels, all that dissapointment, all that pain and you will turn it into rage.

Let it fuel you, let it drive you. You are going to show the world that you matter, that you will leave your mark and not simply fade away.

Get a job, any job. And save a little money. Buy yourself some clothes, some food and dedicate them to your late parents.

You can still make them proud anon.

You still have time.

File: IMG_0001.png (4KB, 400x400px) Image search: [Google]

4KB, 400x400px

>early 20's
>three years ago my life was amazing
>loads of friends, a girlfriend
>everything was looking great
>I don't really know what went wrong from there
>spiralled into a depression and failed community college
>depression intensified and I cut ties with friends, became a recluse
>still living in shitty deadend town in middle of nowhere in U.K.
>feel like I've completely wasted 3 years of my life
>scares me to think about
>all I did was sit in my room and play video games
>the loneliness was crippling for me
>still don't quite feel like myself

Depression is a weird beast.

Fast forward to today. Sold my PS4 and am saving to move countries later this year. I need to get out. Sitting here and trying to get through University would probably end in me throwing myself off of a building.

Usually nobody replies to my posts but fuck it I needed to vent.

>>724954862
Where you headed?

>>724954862
I read it.

Hope the move works out. Best of luck.

>>724954999
South Africa. Have a brother there. He knows my situation.

>>724955195
Thank you, I appreciate it.

Anyone have caps of the girl who's mom killed herself, was homeless, got cheated on, and who lost all her friends???
Think she posted here last month

Anyone have the screen shot of the story with the girl who lived in poverty with a sick dad and when he passed away she found that he made a game for her wishing her a happy birthday?

>>724954692
The people are nice and the food is god tier.
The only problem is that people litter a lot.
You will fit right in anywhere,just bring some cash cause if you want a job you wont find it unless you start one.
>>724954783
I wish I could anon,but the road ends here for me.Im going to visit my parents this morning

How do I Come to terms with being completely useless. I am too stupid to do anything. I'm not creative, I have shit motor skills, I suck at math, I can hardly string a coherent sentence together. I'm not funny, or socially apt, or good at communicating, or leading, or remembering things. I'm not geared towards anything, and to top it off my uncle keeps expecting me to do something with my life. I just want to take a shotgun to my head

>>724955715
If you really must, then I hope you find them, sometime, somewhere.

>>724956052
Thank you anon.
I must go now,may you find love,luck and health in your life for you and your loved ones

File: RedditThatWay.jpg (40KB, 320x320px) Image search: [Google]

40KB, 320x320px

>>724953462
>Hunger Games

>>724954862
My dude, /b/ is here for you, i hope everything turns out fine
Love you nigga

>>724954862
i fear this will happen to me, soon too.you're doing what i was planning, where you at now? not MK by any chance? The hell hole of shit in the middle of england.

>>724956582
<333

>>724956680
My advice would be to just bail mate, unless you have a gf or friends you really care for or something keeping you there.

The question I asked myself was in five years time will I regret not getting the fuck out?

I'm only a few hours from MK.

>>724956504
reddit is a faggot site.
i just finally finished watching all the movies.
cried like a bitch in for this.
>thought it was nice
>wanted to share feels

Why is everyone against grammar schools lads?

>>724950121
you can get a job and you can relate to people like you, if you want. The job probably will suck but if you get to know people like you, your life will become less shittier.

>>724952566
i approve of this post.

File: 1472354460777.jpg (11KB, 255x163px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 255x163px

>>724957018
fucking hell, you seem to have gone to shit and look like you'll recover from it.

i currently have nothing, 1 friend who i speak to of a few seconds on whatsapp maybe once a week, a girlfriend is an incomprehensible situation for me. i fucking sit and play vidya at breaks, then sit at home either surfing the depressing web or training like a fucking olympian to make myself even less attractive. im abrasive and cold, don't care about anyone but my dog, mittens(cats) or my turtle. also vidya is in there, at least 4 hours per day. hope you get out of it fine anon, you are going in the right direction. this country is a hell hole.

>>724951537
hey man, stay close to your brother, help him. Maybe it won't make you get more order in your lfie but at least you would make your lil bro's life easier. I think this is a good enough start.

>>724952012
the thing that make this beautiful is that it may never happen. If it would be possible in any way it would be so common that you would find it boring.

>>724952119
you are above that.

>>724957705
Yeah I feel ya. I have one friend who I trust and actually like.

I sold all my vidya and still miss it sometimes but I don't regret it at all. Not saying you should just don't think you can't live without it. For me it was to stop sudating myself and face reality.

Anyway hope you get out and find happiness too mate.

>>724952063
Start doing things on your own, don't let loneliness be an impediment. Make it your strenght.

>>724958447
what do you do instead of vidya? i would have fuck all to do, i'd kill myself faster to be honest.
i'm intrigued..

>>724952220
If you relate to this, maybe you can try to make plans with your father, it's better than pretending you have social life, it's not that important.

>>724958781
Gym.

I still watch tv shows/movies I like and browse /b/ n shit but not anywhere near what I used to. For some reason with gaming I found it hard to play in moderation. When your life is a mess it's pretty easy to just jump into overwatch and forget you exist for 8 hours.

I've just told myself I'll get back into it in moderation when I get my shit together.

>>724952362
the thing that people don't give a fuck about you make you be able to do anything you want. Take advantage of that.

>>724952887
that's what humour is for, keep it up man. The blackest the better but don't be an asshole.

>>724952119
This girl keeps telling me she loves me

She is 14 though

>>724952978
the end is near, so the best idea is to use it as best as you can.

I want to "focus in myself" but there is this desire to have a family that keeps surfacing. Sometimes I'll find myself looking up names for a son I probably will never have

File: 1472331738940.jpg (76KB, 750x701px) Image search: [Google]

76KB, 750x701px

>>724959151
ok, i appreciate you advice dude. im going to fuck off to bed now. keep safe mate, good luck

>>724959709
Perfectly understandable. I don't mean to assume but for me I often find myself yearning for a normal life (whatever the fuck that even is).

>>724953057
you can differentiate yourself from Hitler, it's worth it

>>724959983
cheers m8 take care

i'm a good looking guy. great actually. tall, well built though i'm starting to get love handles.
No job, no nothing. High sex drive. I used to be called ugly, now i'm considered attractive. i let this get to my head i fucked everything with legs for validation.
tons of 5's and 6's a few 7's and 8s.
I'm NEET btw, i spend everyday in my moms house sleeping in until 2pm, wait until friday go out broke and try to find a way to hop in a girls bed.
The weeks feel like days, tommorow is already friday. I watch sports to entertain myself. Sports and 4chan and some anime is all i really have.
I woke up two weeks ago with genital warts on my cock, i took sandpaper to it, tried to saw them off, and poured alcohol on it, it hurt. My dick is damaged right now. i don't know if this will work. I can no longer have free love and sex like i used to have. Genital warts/herpes don't go away.
I have to make a few phone calls to women to let them know to get tested. i won't
i'm taking this on the chin, trying to see it positively, maybe i should get to know a girl, date her before sticking my dick in her.
either way, this sucks, but at least i can't use sex as a way to hide from my responsibilities anymore
i'm 22.

>>724952012

>boo hoo me: the post

How fucking pathetic, just go find any of the other 5 billion fuck holes to love.

>>724960281
Damn anon, your life didn't seem that bad up until the genital warts lmao. I don't know anything about it, is it easily treatable? Have you been to a doctor?

I forgot that if you're American you don't have free health care so that can be tricky.

bye anons, I would have liked to give some upbeat answer to each of you but I need to get some rest.
From a depressed faggot like you all.
Good night.

>>724952012
Fuck you I'm on this right now, I am taking the risk and jumping into it , I've found my girl, life has given me the opportunity, and I won't let it slip.

>>724960609
Good night dude, gah bless

>>724959039
got me so hard

>>724951537
>I want my brother to sort himself
Sort Yourself Out

lead by example

>>724960337
Sex addict here. This isn't as easy as you might find.
Girls really only care about attraction and direction.
And you have to have both.
Very few guys have both, Attraction will get you laid. Direction will get you dates.
But having both will get you a gf
I have one, the first one. And i got the prettiest girl into bed with me. she left after a month of sex and it hurt alot.
See the thing about most guys is that they don't have enough options to realise this and move on easily. They burrow themselves in sorrow and rememberance while their girl is fucked by another.
As for me, i had a dream about her the other night, she kissed me and said "i haven't been touched since you touched me"
i woke up smiling.
Anyways, the end point is. You can't tell someone how to get over someone.
I dwelled over my case, it wasn't until i realised i was desirable that i could, many are not as fortunate as me.
Rest, heal, and do something productive until these feelings go away

I'm getting sick of everyone pitying me. It seems like they think I'm retarded. Like at work everyone gives me compliments when I know I'm doing a subpar job

File: FoW.png (137KB, 576x1024px) Image search: [Google]

137KB, 576x1024px

If you lovely feelers have Kik you are most welcome to join our Feels on Wheels!

kik.me/g/CJo6FNvGTv1jCE1btuVPteHIv20

We're a group formed from feels threads about 1.5 years ago, wanting to get to know new people just like you! We have a few spots open, all types of people are welcome as long as you are able to respect others!

Our origins was talking about and sharing our feels, which we still do. But we have grown to be a great community of lovely people talking about anything we like. Join us!

- Close

>>724960588
Its not that easy. You spend 4-5 months emotionally investing into a girl and when you tell her you like/love her she just laugh at your face. And has the audacity to ask if im memeing her. When shit like that happenes you just question whats the point of anything. This was the one person that understood me. Made all the loneliness go away. And now ik i will never be anything with her. Reading that post actually made me cry. im only 18-1 so i hope things get better.

>>724961389
I know how you feel, it fucking sucks. Especially since it happens to often and you don't know what you're doing to cause it.

For me it was simply that I always looked nervous and shit and they felt they needed to make me feel better.

>>724952012

I've had so many moments where women told me 'I love you'.

The problem is, it wasn't an 'i love you'. It was "You are funny, I love how funny you are" - so I always just sort of take it in stride, and ignore them. If I ever made a move, I am 99% sure, they would say 'it's just a phrase' or 'no, I meant you're funny'. So I never made a move.

Hearing someone say I love you hurts more than not hearing it, when you know they don't mean it, and it's just a way of them expressing their joy to your jokes.

>>724956303
Dont do it anon

>Be me, 4 years old
>Live in a trailer in the middle of nowhere
>Dad cooks me breakfast - bacon, eggs, toast,
>Dad makes me lunch - Sandwich, Mac and Cheese
>Dad eats Ramen
>Dad makes dinner for me - Baked Potato, Chicken, Green Beans
>Dad eats Ramen
>This is relatively normal for months and moths, i literally never see my dad eat anything but Ramen
>"Dad, why do you always eat noodles?"
>He just smiles and says its his favorite and since he is an adult, he gets to eat what he wants
>Not until years later do I realize its because we were too poor to afford food for both of us.

Everyone in here that's crying over females, you all seem too sensitive. The ones who have invested in women for months only to get rejected in the end.
Life doesn't work like this, you have to take what you want.
Next time instead of admiring that girl in your class all semester from a distance, go sit next to her and talk.
Then if hse seems interested, grow some balls and ask her out on a date.
Don't grow attatched so quickly.
Keep doing this until success, its actually fun.

>>724951537
>I have all the symptoms of depression
>all my friends tell me I'm depressed
>my little brother also shows all the symptoms of depression
>I'm not depressed, trust me

Fucking retard. Go see a therapist or off yourself.

I don't want it talk to people, I am boring. I have nothing to say 9/10 times

>>724953274
This is me. I don't talk anymore. I type and write on forums some odd thing or two, most of the time I type something up then end up canceling the submission.

>>724959039
damn, good thing its all fake

>>724962121
>Same Guy, 8 years later
>Move into first real house that is just mine and my dads
>Join baseball team, meet good friends, get on team with a kid in my neighborhood
>Become best friends basically, he only lives 2 streets away
>After school, dad helps with homework then we go practice baseball
>Dad is in a wheelchair, paralyzed from the waist down
>I'm bad, our practice is mostly fetch for him
>After like 30 mins he is too tired so we go inside
>I'm disappointed my dad is broken

>Dad is going in for surgery, best friend's parents say I can stay with them for the week he is in the hospital
>Super excited, will have my friend and his dad to practice baseball with
>His dad gets home from work, opens a beer and watches tv, everyday
>weekend comes his dad just drinks and watches nascar and football
>Ask friend when his dad he helps him with homework or baseball
>"Never, he is to tired after work"
>Realize my dad wasn't broken at all
>Tell dad i'm sorry when I see him, never tell him why cause i'm ashamed.

I'm useless, no future, no hope.

File: maxresdefault.jpg (42KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 1280x720px

>>724950121

>that feel when you really want something and feel passionate about it to the point that nothing else in your life motivates you but then you discover you're no good at it

will someone please hit me with a fucking bus

>>724959039
Fake, but even if real, he would have been 100% responsible.

Seeing as it's fake, that's a fucking pedophile who wrote that. No way around it, even projected in his writing the fact that he's a pedo by making it the sole insult in the story.

>>724965273
your never automatically the best at something, you still have to work for it

>>724961754
so true brah

>>724953699
YOU ARE ONLY 23 MAN! THERES STILL TIME! You dont have to be rich and millionaire and have a perfect life. Start with something simple, apply for a job, customer service or whatever. maybe youll even meet a cute client who you could date. try studying something you like on the side part time if you cant. see how things go and keep giving it a try!

>>724954862
i saw this, and i support your decision to move, go and experiement, always remember theres a way to start over

>>724951537
i would agree, you're not depressed, your life is just shit.

your problem is summarized in your first words, you have no motivation.

get some. if you have nothing to be motivated about, pick something and pretend you are. nobody will know the difference and in time, the motivation will be real.

>>724967838
Where is my motivation?

No time for motivation.

>be in high school
>be in a friend group with 4 guys and 2 girls
>all the lads secretly liked the one girl (call her A)
>I fucking adored her
>Get angry whenever someone makes her laugh or smile
>sometimes we linked arms on the way to class
>her smile
>she was the closest to me of all in the group
>A said she's not dating until college
>applied for her college, didn't get in as I was too late
>she's introverted af so all I could do is text her

>a few months later she was in a relationship
>her boyfriend was a lanky 6/10 with scary eyes
>endmysuffering.jpg
>told me everything about him for quite a while
>gave her advice as my heart lowkey shrivelled
>4AM on Sunday A texts me, wakes me up
>"anon, he keeps hitting me and screaming at me, am I doing something wrong?"
>spine_chilled.png
>we discussed until 6AM and I told her he was abusive and you deserve better
>the next day she stayed at my place, hiding for her life from him
>held A close, comforting the fug outta her
>her thighs had bruises all over them
>she had never been to my place before, she was a lil reclusive and found comfort at her own home
>"a-anon... can I stay here for a bit longer?"
>look into her adorably enticing emerald green eyes
>"Stay here for as long as you need to.. I'd hate to see you go."
>her smile
>her phone had a million texts from her boyfriend
>she scrolled through them, tearing up
>I was fucking seething at this shitlord
>he acted all sad for sympathy, making it out like it was her fault
>reassured her, listed everything I liked about her
>the blush
>she kissed me right then and there on the cheek
>I melted on the inside, my fucking first kiss at 16

>she stayed for a couple more weeks, sleeping in my bed with me
>she gets another text from her boyfriend
>"we're through, you're just being a childish bitch"
>simultaneous sigh of relief
>"Thank god this is all over, you didn't deserve any of this mess"
>she held on to me closer than ever before
character limit

>>724960281
theres a possible treatment in study right now who has succesfully cured genital warts has to do with the pills used for aids treatment

>>724953057
too close

File: 1437869667590.jpg (72KB, 500x400px) Image search: [Google]

72KB, 500x400px

>>724955715
>>724953699
If you truly wish to end your life, maybe it's for the best, though the one part I struggle to relate to is
>I just feel like I dissapointed my mom and dad...
>Im going to visit my parents this morning

I mean, you didn't know any of them. Age 1 isn't an age you can form memories. You only have the idea of parents and what parents should represent in an individual's life and the emotion attached to the idea of parents.
You shouldn't make them feel proud or fear to disappoint them or yearn to "meet" them (inb4 after life exists), since you have no real connection to them. so what if they are your biological parents?! They didn't take part in your life. I can get not having anything else to attach emotionally with but to attach to an idea feels stupid to me, and I'm honestly curious to understand this. Will be happy to read a reply.

btw, I'm also 23 and lost my mother at age of 6, never knew father so I'm not too far from your world in that regard I guess

i'm a normie btw
>be me
>16
>in intro to culinary aka culinary for sophomores
>teacher is a crazy bitch
>learning how to use knives
>she tells people if you dont listen you'll become a stubby handed freak that everyone will make fun of
>mfw I'm actually missing missing half of my finger
>she calls everyone stubby including me
>the name that is basically the n word for anyone missing fingers
>she doesn't realize that I'm missing a finger the whole class
>my disability was laughed at all class
>after class i ask her to stop saying it
>she brushes it off and say "oh sorry"
>next day she continues to basically say it

File: 1429811759312.gif (359KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

359KB, 500x375px

Not really that sad but I just fucking hate myself
>Be me
>girl I like is in my physics class
>due to scheduling conflict, only have class with her once a week
>don't even sit next to her
>talked to her a few times
>today she was complaint about how many stairs are in our school
>starts stretching her ass right in front of me
>too beta to make any moves
>don't see her enough to really start something
>mfw never had a girlfriend
>mfw it will probably stay that way

I am still feeling shitty from when my friend shot me down.

I finally came clean about how I felt for her, and simply got "Well I really appreciate your honesty. I'm just so focused on myself and what I'm doing with my life, I don't have the time to pursue anything with anyone"

I fucking woulda wished that she coulda been completely upfront with me. Instead still avoided saying "I only like you as a friend"

Some people who know the situation are saying that I have like a 30% chance of it working out in the long run... So.. Maybe she said it being completely sincere, but wanting to maybe do something down the line? Doubtful though, but one can hope?

And now today, it's being worried about her dropping out of college

She sent this text "Yeah, I'm looking to work in FDNY EMS and one of my friends work in the department, so it might work out"

Keep in mind, FDNY does not offer Part Time employment, and that she's looking to start in August, when classes traditionally begin. Also, they do not require a graduate degree, or any college credits at all. And she already dropped out of a well regarded Uni (WVU) for a community college.

File: 1476674207753.gif (2MB, 374x308px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 374x308px

>>724970699
Obviously you're a normie.
Realize she doesn't mean to hurt you and move on. You don't need to tolerate those feelings of offence and dismay. Reject them. Its the only healthy way to live.

>>724952119
liar liar pants on fire

I'm gonna be alone forever
I'm good and smart. I need a good smart girl. But no girl I know is good or smart. I could go to a college for good people but not for smart people. I'm fucked.

>>724953529
▲
▲▲

>>724952063
tbh this /b/ro I have friends but I don't really have anyone to go out with. So I just go out alone still fun. I meet people and we dance but I still feel like something is missing and a bit empty inside

File: triforce faggot.png (18KB, 745x632px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 745x632px

>>724974211

File: 1478317766421.png (23KB, 500x379px) Image search: [Google]

23KB, 500x379px

>>724950121
Alright. Story time I guess
>be me. 23
>Getting therapy to overcome depression
>it's hard but I'm making progress
>I'm in love with my best friend( we will call her R)
>we have known each other for years.
>we are pretty close
>R visited me in the hospital along with talking to me everyday.
>she is totally there for me
>after I get out and back to normal life we become closer.
>we talk and hang out almost everyday.
>she really cares and gets me.
>my feelings are becoming stronger as the days pass.
>I finally decide to tell R how I feel about her.
>after we get dinner and hang out one night I decide now is the time
>I tell her everything, how much I like her and how attracted I am to her.
>I tell her how much she means to me, how much I care about her.
>I let it all out...

Cont...

Sometimes I wonder if I really did fuck up along the way.

A lot of my time nowadays is dedicated to nothing but anger and hate. I remember when I was a generally sweet and kind kid, but now I'm regarded as a sadist. I was that one chubby nice kid in elementary and middle school, but somewhere along the line, I decided that I needed to start fucking hating people. It was such a massive resentment, that I wasn't a 'jock', or a 'chad', who occasionally picked on one of you aspies. I was a fucking douche. I am a fucking douche. Usually I just lurk here, but this is the first time I've felt like saying something in a while.

A few days ago I had this dream where I found a gun. Literally, the first thing I do, is jam it up to my head and try shooting myself.

I wish I was still the nice kid I used to be.

File: 1475478803363s.jpg (2KB, 125x125px) Image search: [Google]

2KB, 125x125px

>>724974483
Cont...

>so I tell her everything
>and she is looking at me with surprise
>but she is also giving this radiant smile as I am talking
>the look in her eyes was alluring and incredibly intense
>(we are at my house while this is happening) I'm not sure what is gonna happen next
>after I finish she continues to have this grin on her face.
>she says "wow... im... I'm shocked. I kinda figured you liked me but I never knew you felt so strongly about me."
>she continues "shit... I'm blushing like crazy just saying it. Thank you Andrew, it means a lot to me."
>I tell her that I just needed to get it off my chest
>she looks at me and say "you know... I've got a lot going on right now. I got a lot of shit I need to still figure out about my life..."
>my heart sinks... but I kind of saw this coming.
>I am well aware that she is still in love with her ex( they broke up 4months ago)
>I tell her I understand and I wasn't looking for her to answer me in the first place.
>the night goes on and we continue to talk and hang like normal.
>things are not normal though, we hang out everyday, we talk everyday, hell if I throw a party at my house we sleep in my bed (no sex sadly).
>we are so close and yet we seem so far apart.

So the reason why I am telling this story is because I feel like I need to move on. I told her how I felt, and yeah we are super close but I can't just wait for her to make up her mind.... I'm conflicted cuz I really love her. But I don't know if I should continue to chase these feelings...

Thoughts?

>>724972005
>Some people who know the situation are saying that I have like a 30% chance of it working out in the long run

They are shitty people, trying to not make you feel bad in the moment, but what happens, is you'll end up hoping it will work out, and it slowly poisons you over the long term.

She doesn't like you, that's 100% girl talk for - I do not like you romantically.

Simple test - if it was her celeb crush, would she say 'well I really appreciate...' - NO. She'd be with that celebrity. You have no chance. Better to hear it now than let it poison you.

File: You+know+that+this+isnt+my+game+play+right+_b6f5fa082c92a446459e55c52e22d3a1.jpg (16KB, 319x326px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 319x326px

>>724974502
Why do you feel the need to hate those around you?

>>724973728
never lose faith on that, just as most girls think good boys are hidden, good girls are hidden too. they stay at home on friday nights, they sit quietly in the back of the class, they watch free movies they downloaded by torrents, they cry themselves to sleep because they grew up thinking they werent enough. Just keep looking harder. say thank you to the shy girl working at mcdonalds part time because she cant afford college but she needs the money to become an engineer, help that girl who sits in the children book section alone in the library because she feels like shes missed out on part of her childhood since her dad touched her more than often. good smart girls are everywhere, they are just afraid to show themselves and hide behind a mask of makeup hoping no one will notice how she really doesnt fit in that frat party

>>724974850

I don't know. I just feel no human connection anymore. I guess I just need to block people out, or something. :/

>>724974700
Don't push it too much, but if she really was smiling that much, there may be something there. But at the same time, if you guys are sleeping together without sex...

File: 0f0.jpg (39KB, 960x604px) Image search: [Google]

39KB, 960x604px

>>724975003
>You feel like you need to block people out

Is it because you have a hard time connecting with others?

You block people out, but that doesn't bring you happiness does it?

File: 1488935129156.jpg (57KB, 900x900px) Image search: [Google]

57KB, 900x900px

My life just sucks mad dick
>Fat cunt (300+ lbs)
>Lazy asshole
>Failing school
>Can't be bothered to socialize with anyone
>Never had a gf
>All I do is sit at my desk and do nothing for 7 hours

Might as well end myself right here and now since I'm such a disappointment to humanity.

I have visions of what's going to happen the next day sometimes, it's really fucked me over cause I can't tell when I'm dreaming or not anymore because of it,

File: first meal.png (7KB, 402x28px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 402x28px

>>724975252

Nothing really brings me happiness anymore, tbh. I find no pleasure in what I used to do, (video games, writing, music) so now I just kinda.. Sit around, jerk off, and be an asshole.

>>724951537
I had a similar thing happen to me anon, my best friend ghosted on me and didn't respond much for like 2 years.

Focus on your schoolwork, it's the most important thing. It's a lonely and miserable way, but you're lonely no matter what. Success in school will at least make you feel ok, and it seems like a lot of the other things that are upsetting you can't be fixed right now without investments that you don't seem to want to make.

If you're in Uni and STEM (since "school" could be anything), get in a lab or something. It helps you to realize what your goals are and gives you very helpful experience. It's also a good way to meet fellow autists.

Your brother's life is his own, let him know that you're there for him but let him make his own choices. If he refuses to learn from his mistakes, then he's going to fail. Maybe he'll learn from yours, open up to him if you think it'd help.

You can't get something good out of life without putting good things into it, unless you're Chad and everything is handed to you on a golden platter.

>>724975301
Pretty sure this is a dream though, fuck off nonexistent anons

File: 6195419+_77b6d581f91f24b97939fe86b03f02f4 (1).jpg (16KB, 290x326px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 290x326px

>>724975149
Honestly I feel like a part of her does have feelings for me.

but whatever she feels for me isn't stronger than what she feels for her ex.

I guess that's the problem...

File: 148227205zdazd5823.jpg (597KB, 3384x3616px) Image search: [Google]

597KB, 3384x3616px

>>724950121
i was born in a muslim country and have been living here for 21 years, i was muslim for 16 years, until i became a weeb through anime and watched american shit, then i became a closet atheist cause it was hard to make arguments against friends and family and it didn't understand much of everything yet.
My country is in North Africa.
to put you into perspective, If you publicly kiss someone you go to prison
if you smoke a joint, you go to prison
if you have sex, you go to prison( prostitutes carry STDs, girlfriends want to remain "pure", people don't live alone unless they are married, people don't rent to single people here, so you live with your parents until marriage)
i was and i'm still very suicidal, i always get depressed and want to kill myself
white people (on /pol/ sure hate me and i hate my own country and ethnicity for that matter
i don't relate with anything in my country, i even hate the holidays
people can't accept it when you're an atheist (except some who just don't want to argue)
and also my father left when i was 6, mom is illiterate and we're kind of less than average in finances.
i still have 3 years of education before i get my engineering degree and i hope i can leave.
>i don't have the sauce

File: nmsuj.jpg (19KB, 466x315px) Image search: [Google]

19KB, 466x315px

>>724975444
I see... but sitting around and not doing anything doesn't bring you happiness either does it? It's just a way to waste time.

Sounds dumb, but have you tried to do new things? Things you have always wanted to do?

I'm asking Cuz this is from the perspective of someone with MDD who is digging themselves out of that rut

>>724975533
Not trying to rain on your parade, but I find that it always seems like people might like us when you are people like us. We often see any little bit of attention or suggestive body language or talking as a sign of love. But I don't know your situation personally, though she definitely cares about you

Feel a seizure coming on. Took 3 seroquels after drinking 3 pots of coffee. Mood swinging from rage to masochistic urges. Biting my tongue involuntarily and facial muscles twitching. Pissed off. \Can't live like thiis much longer

>>724975855

I'm thinking of taking up some new hobbies. I was pretty excited for Resi 7, but, y'know. I used to do Yoga, and I really enjoyed that.

>>724974757
Maybe. Though she has heavily seemed interested, even before we knew each other on a personal level.

My big concern is the whole FDNY situation though with her possibly dropping out of college

File: NNAeM58.jpg (34KB, 640x640px) Image search: [Google]

34KB, 640x640px

>>724975871
Very true bro. Your exactly right. We see what we want to see.

I guess it's hard because she gives me mixed signals. Just two days ago when we hung out she was asking me if I'm dating anyone. She was surprised I wasn't cuz she said I'm "attractive" or "10/10" (I'm not). She went on to ask if I was ready for a relationship if someone came along...

Mixed signal hell lol

>>724975988
Start doing physical activity. Bike or run. It can really relieve stress/anget,and can take up a lot of your day where you're doing nothing. And you'll be getting in good shape while you're doing it. Nothing was better than a few summers ago when I'd spend most of my day cycling and come home to play video games that actually felt deserved, felt like I'd worked for them.

>>724976172
Did you say yes?

ITT
pussy ass bitches with fake problems

kys

>>724976254
Not everything has to be a major problem, you whiny faggot

>>724976254
How is this >>724975784 fake ?

File: 13408768_1761890704095930_1688080415_n.jpg (66KB, 362x447px) Image search: [Google]

66KB, 362x447px

>>724975988
It sounds dumb, but at least for me, getting out and doing something new helped me. maybe try yoga if you enjoy that!

It helped me out of the rut and I eventually wentry back to writing and music I used to enjoy.

Tomorrow is promised to no one, which is why we must try to live in the present

>>724975784
Get out of your shitty country

>>724976324
>reading comprehension this bad

you all make it seem major, is the problem, nig nog

>>724976146
P O I S O N

>>724976254
What constitutes a "real problem" then.

>>724976579
We're just talking about our problems. Get out of you hate it so much

File: 6060613+_0afe3f4db66f23e66156e11f7d4e1bf0.png (112KB, 325x238px) Image search: [Google]

112KB, 325x238px

>>724976251
Well yeah I told her if someone special came along I would be ready (last may I went through a bad breakup of 5 years).

Idk man... It just sucks. Like I said I know for a fact she's still into her ex

Anyone else ever had something in their life that set them off on the most horrible bender they've ever been on? Been over six months for me now and I wish I could stop. So does my liver.

File: bf9.jpg (209KB, 756x1100px) Image search: [Google]

209KB, 756x1100px

>>724976254
Nice

>>724975938
are you trying suicide? is this a deadly combination or something? please call an ambulance, dont let something happen to you, please i care for you

File: 16640637_1707635769477068_4735464356438753215_n.jpg (94KB, 720x960px) Image search: [Google]

94KB, 720x960px

>>724976523
You missed the "whites on /pol/ hate our kind"
i'm afraid that even after immigrating, i won't find anyone to related to, like i am now, simply because only shallow liberal normies would accept me

My little bro is 13 and still struggles reading, he stutters with every word he speaks and still struggles with social queues. He's not a full tard becuase he still gets good grades in school but I don't want him to grow up as a social recluse like me, I want him to have a good life. But I just saw the list of adaptions his school placed him on and he still struggles. Reads at a grade 3 level despite being grade 8. He can also only type at 17wpm. Idk what I can do to help him have a better life. I just feel like shit.

File: Stick_To_Your_Guns_-_Diamond.jpg (49KB, 500x500px) Image search: [Google]

49KB, 500x500px

>>724976735
What set you off?

What set me off was the breakup with my ex of 5 years. Went on a bender for about 3 months. There were work days and there were drinking days. And days I drank and worked.

>>724976799
Fuck pol it's a minority of autists. America might not be the best option right now but most of Europe is getting chucked and loving it right now, so it could be an option

This song is pretty crushing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZ0EP9nuyEA

>>724976713
get off my board with your fucking retarded feelings and general worthlessness you fucking numale
REEEEEEEEE

also, everyone who wants to An hero, pls do. you will not be missed.

>>724977004
Same thing for me only it was a two year relationship. Already had a drinking problem but that just set it through the roof. Funny thing is I think I'm pretty well over her and don't harbour bitterness or anything anymore but it's just hard to get off the damn bender now.

File: image_8.jpg (96KB, 960x640px) Image search: [Google]

96KB, 960x640px

>>724977085

>>724977183
>more worthless emotion
cmon

the fuck is this feels thread, so shitty... cmon b make me cry.

File: 5700826+_21f6faf63491f26529ec447c24381777.jpg (16KB, 351x329px) Image search: [Google]

16KB, 351x329px

>>724977182
Stopping once you start is hard. You ask yourself what's the point?

But there is a point. Your relationship ended, but your life can begin anew. It's may be a struggle at first, but you get to restart and pick up where you left off

>>724977934
I really want it to begin anew at this point. I totally accept that she's gone and it could never have worked out anyway. I'm thinking of asking someone to help me to get to rehab for a while maybe so I can pull myself together.

WHORES
GIRLS ARE WHORES
Not that there's anything wrong with that. But damn. No really so dumb. I'm way dumber than them. Thinking a girl likes me just cuz they're attracted to me. Literally dumb as fuck. I act cool and manly and girls O.O but I'm still just a weeny and they figure that out but as long as I act hot most of the time they just ignore that shit. But right under the surface I'm dying.

>>724976922
try to make him cultivate a love for lecture. try making him read stories for you, tell him its important for him to do it. do it every night and try to watch foreign cartoons with subtitles after, he will be forced to read to understand. i recommend south park in spanish with english subtitles since he will be forced to read by himself out of curiosity and morbidity. first phase tho, try to make him read you many different short stories at least one every night. buy a short story book, preferably one funny or with maybe some bad words, 8th graders will always be lured by that and you will manage to actually get him to read

Music that makes you feel ok with being lonely.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F3W_alUuFkA

>>724974700
dude, girls like that like having you as a option. she obviously likes you but doesn't know if she wants to date you.
once you have a girl, she's going to want to date you because now other people want you, you seem to have value so now she wants you too. don't trick her and say theres someone else when theres not. but give her an ultimatum and say look this is either gonna happen now or never because if you don't want this to go any further im just going to move on and try for other girls

I've come to the point in my life where I don't want to look like a failure compared to my siblings. They're super talanted in everything they do, yet I never reached the standards that they're on, except if you look at it from physical aspects. That's why I decided to join the marines. I've never felt loved, I never get that warm kind of hug only a mom can give you, my dad never wants to do activities together with me, my siblings count me out of everything which have made me emotionaly cold and filled with a pain that I can't really describe.
At this point I feel like the only thing I can do is to make it through military training and deploy. I don't want to die a lonely death in my country, I'd rather die beside my brothers in arms, which I will know would rather have seen themselves getting shot than me. I would be so excited, to finally feel loved and important. To finally feel that the bros always counted me in as a important team member. That's all I ever wanted, to feel needed.

>>724975444
checked. i miss the days where rs brought me joy 10 years feels like such a long time ago now.

>>724979052
I get the military feeling sometimes too, but I'm sure I'm too much of a pussy

>Be poor kid, live in Grandmas house with mom
>Grandma sends me to a private christian school for kindergarten
>Have alot of fun with my friends in the class for the first half of the year
>around the halfway point of the school year its my birthday
>invite all of my friends, it was at McDs
>Mom bakes a special cake just for this and gets some birthday shit for it and sets it all up
>I wait for all my friends to come
>None of them show up, not one of them
>Mom realizes no one is coming and looks super upset, tries to get other kids who are there to just join in with the party
>Wonder why none of my friends wanted to come
>turns out their parents all said to not hang out or talk to the poor kid
>rest of the year have zero friends and just talk to the teacher who took pitty on me
>transfer schools at the end of the year

:(

>>724953413
This photo gets to me, spent three years dreaming of the same girl repeatedly, finally got her, she was absolutely perfect. At least until she started showing signs of being a flat-out lying whore, but I was in denial so I was beating a dead horse for a little over two years until I had enough. I miss the old dreams I had of her more than anything. Be careful /b/ros

>>724953699
hey, anon. I'm sure you've left the thread by now, but I wanted to let you know that I care. I wish I could do something to help, and just reach through the screen and give you a hug. I'm sorry you ended up where you are now.
I wish I could help, but just know that I care.

>>724979052
I did the same as you, but I got injured and kicked out in December. I was only in for a few months and didn't even make it out of training

>>724979605
That one gets me too. Same thing with my ex. And when she ran off with another man it's been like there's a ghost of her that haunts me. I even wrote a whole albums worth of music about it all and was thinking of something similar to that picture for the album cover.

Pity bump

pls no die

>>724965273
push yourself anon! the first step to being good at something is admitting you're shit at it and want to improve.
>>724972005
hey, EMT anon. I'm still thinking and caring about you <3
>>724975295
the only one capable of changing you, is you. if you want to be more sociable, do better in school, stop being lazy, that falls on you. take baby steps to improve yourself and work yourself out of this rut. please remember I believe in you.
>>724980331
we're all gonna make it, bumping anons <3

>>724979605
I know the feel. I still wake up in a cold sweat sometimes.

>>724979570
Wow that sucks. Did life get better?

>Be me, 22
>Hate my life
>Hate my job
>Hate my coworkers
>Have crippling depression
>Hide it from wife
>Keep my gun in safe so I don't do something stupid
>Wife is surrounded by friends
>Lost all my friends when we moved to St Louis
>All I've got is B, and all of you great people
>can't figure out how to make the pain go away
>Pop a few xanax and pray tomorrow will be a better day

>It never is a better day.

>>724954219
this fucked me up

>>724981067
hey, anon. you have any hobbies? anything in your spare time that brings you a bit of joy in life?

>>724952119
I love you

>>724952220
This story always get me

>>724952119
jokes on you, my mom did this morning, my cousin did when my grandma had a stroke over the weekend

>>724952887
this has been my FB cover for the past like 3 years

>>724952119
In my family no one has ever said that. Repressed English people.

>>724952362
No i just hate the fact that i know that i can talk to people and make good friends with them but for some reason I can't theres something in my brain that got turn off.

How can I become a more interesting conversationalist?

>>724980940
Nah, shit got worse. I think about killing myself daily, but the only thing stopping me is I promised myself I'd wait til 25 to see if shit ever gets better. Seeing a psych and on meds for anxiety but shit just never seems to end up working out for me.

BTW I'm also this anon >>724979905

>>724951537
connection error....gotta love the irony

>>724981273
I've tried so many things and really suck at all of them. My wife is so talented, she can complete any Hobbie you throw at her. A true artist. But no, at the end of the day the only thing I'm good at is having a beer and lurking around Feels threads. At least it makes me feel surrounded.

I still don't know how I can share my bed with someone merely inches away, and feel like I'm 1000 miles away from anyone.

There's a bluebird in my heart.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lyMS4qJ8NXU

>>724982064
it doesn't matter if you suck, bud. I've played guitar for over a decade, and I'd still argue that I suck.
instead, it's a starting point! find something you want to do, set a point you want to reach with it, and work your way there. you'll be awful at first, sure, but over time you might get pretty okay at it.

>>724953529
Everytime

I wonder if she ever misses me or even thinks of me.

>>724982393
I used to play guitar, maybe I'll try that again. Thanks Anon.

>>724974700
Continue things as normal but stay with your true feelings. If she hasn't changed anything yet (hanging out and all that) then it hasn't ruined anything so you definietly have a shot

>>724981939
Interested is interesting.

just ask them questions about what they do, who they are Ect. ect. Act interested, because people fucking love talking about themselves.

Say shit like "thats cool" "neat" and try to find common ground. Or ask details about something they do that you have always wanted to do yourself.

"Oh you ski? Cool ive always wanted to go! What kind of equiptment do you need? where is your favorite place to go?" ect

Also first rule is be interesting. Have fun weird hobbies. NOTHING SUPER NERDY. I swear to god no one gives a fuck about your japanese weapon collection or your creepy dolls. NO ONE

Have gone places or done interesting things you can talk about. "Yea I swim a super lot. Not competitively, I just love to do it. The Mediterranean has the best waters though. So soft, maybe its the minerals?" or even "Yea my buddy and I got fucked up and stole a golf cart. We almost got caught but we jumped a fence. hahah" " I'm saving up to buy a canoe and take it to the lake. Not the mose interesting but I like to do that" that last one is super interesting. People like people who do shit. again not weird shit like 4TB of cheese pizza. 1000000% turn off. Fun active shit. Questions?

>>724982514
The shitty truth? She probably doesn't. But you deserve better, you really, really do. You deserve someone who can return the love and time you invest in them. Someone who can listen to you, someone who can believe in you. You deserve someone who truly loves you, but as for now, you'll have to put up with is misfits and retards.

We love you.

Your great white buffalo wasn't really your great white buffalo.

>>724982516
<3 if you ever need advice on learning, stop by the guitar generals over on /mu/
they're sometimes harsh on new players, but you'll still find some great advice if you look.

>>724982853
Yeah I realize that now. Just sometimes I wonder because it seams so surreal how she said she loved me for almost two years then just decided she didn't anymore in one day. Don't know how someone just switches something like that off because it takes me forever but I guess I can chalk it up to a lack of depth.

>>724983234
It's easy for a person to say I love you, when they have no idea what it means.

>>724983424
Yep. I think in this case it meant "I'm infatuated with you." Like I said. Lack of depth.

>>724981945
Well I really hope things get better. It may be cheesy but life is precious

I got raped as a kid, it's ruined my whole life. I've ruined more lives by coming out about it, instead of keeping it a secret and dealing with it.

>>724981067
weed anon...weed will help you

>>724984230
Who raped you? How did coming out about it cause more harm

>>724974404
▲
▲▲

So I got rejected by a girl who was a literal 10 to me because I was a bit too young for her. Like 3 years is a bit too much? What the fuck dude.

>>724984397
Weed just gets me paranoid. Used to pop pills in highschool though

File: f53.jpg (11KB, 223x219px) Image search: [Google]

11KB, 223x219px

I love someone who does not love me back.

>>724984417
A teacher when I was in first grade. Went on for a while, might have been a principal too, but after I recalled it in therapy I was done digging, don't want to know.

I just remember the look my mother had on her face when I told her.

It seems like before I was the kid who was just a little asshole.

I became the kid who was just a box of used goods tossed on the curb.

File: IMG_8193.jpg (86KB, 960x496px) Image search: [Google]

86KB, 960x496px

A lot of these stories are about losing love. And...

It's one thing to lose love. It's another to lose someone you're in love with to someone they're in love with. Sure, you tell yourself to move on, but you don't.

You don't.

You. Fucking. Don't.

And so instead, you're alone, browsing the /b/ threads because that's what your life has amounted to. No women, no family to show for. And in the end... we'll, I'll say, it's depressing.

>everybody here will probably die alone
>because that's who we /b/ros are
>we don't get girls
>we don't have girls
>and those that do, they broke the normality. But it DOESNT last forever. It never does.


So, /b/ros, ill say this- thanks. For being here time and time again. Because by the end of the day, it's comforting to know I'm not quite alone in the game of life. It's reassuring, albeit morbidly, to know that I'm not the only one struggling with the unescapable web of Feels and Depression.

I'm so tired.

>>724984955
Been there. If this is the case you need to walk away. You can't make someone love you.

>>724960281
My partner found genital warts on himself. Apparently it can lie dormant in your system for years is what my gyno said. I tested negative and he went and got treatment. Shit it fine, now. The only thing is he tried a similar method you did and tried to scrape those shits off. Now, he has scars but no warts.

>>724985169
>It's another to lose someone you're in love with to someone they're in love with.

Tell me about it. Was going to get married. Horribly in love with her. Told me not to worry about random dude adding her to facebook who she was talking to and lied about having deleted him. Took a couple of months for her to dump me then run off to live with him an another country and was engaged within a month following.

File: Frank_(2).jpg (184KB, 490x653px) Image search: [Google]

184KB, 490x653px

Anybody got these bittersweet feels?

>rough ish years from 17-19. Going no where
>gf kills herself, friend od's
>put self through school
>break my back working while doing school
>meet woman
>dumped by woman
>meet pretty good woman
>finish chemE degree
>she finishes hers
>multiple leases together, joint bank acct, the works
>looking at getting married
>finish my MBA
>we have a house, 2 cars, stacking money
>I feel myself becoming that boring adult that works for the weekend
>not sure if want kids
>not sure if I should get married bc we basically are already, what's the point?

Idk what I want anymore. Im in my mid 20s and idk what the point is. I thought money would fix things. I don't hate my job or my woman, but I'm not getting fulfillment.

>>724984615
My friend started dating a woman who is 34 and he is 21. I don't get it. She's not hot and kind of annoying. She's gonna be dried up if they ever want kids

>>724985063
You can't let those sick fucks affect your self image. What they did to you was not about you specifically, but a act of thier sick minds. You can still reclaim your life. Also fuck it if their lives are ruined they deserved it

t. Was molested myself by brother

>>724965750
You're a cuck, it's projected in your writing.

>>724981067
wife may be cheating on you...

>>724987271
Yeah? How's that?

TFW actually a misogynist.

>>724987870
LOL okay, this made me laugh my ass off. My wife wouldn't even know what to do with another man. Unfortunately anon, she won't be sucking your dick. Lol

>>724987871
K cuck.

When will the pain go away?

>>724975301
ayyyyyyyyyy i aint the only one with that shit.
it's been fuckin with me lately tho, past couple weeks i've been seeing bits of my phone, so far i know that sooner or later at 3:35 pm the girl i like is gonna tell me about how she finally got fucked

The part that's fucking with me the most is that i don't usually dream and when i do they mean something. Like i dreamt that my ex killed herself, she'd tried that night and I've seen random shit that would happen months later so the only timeframe is that i'm home and i've got the same phone. But i haven't been wrong yet so

>>724988024
Did you write that? Is that why you're mad?

>>724988181
What's causing the pain?

>>724988510
I do not know.

>>724988542
Are you just depressed for no reason? Gotta be something.

>>724988867
I cannot explain properly.

>>724988334
The only person who is mad here is you. I'm not judging you for being a cuck, so don't be mad at yourself for being one.

File: I don't need it.jpg (28KB, 480x360px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 480x360px

>Life
Really taking all I've got to not cave and start smoking again.

I don't know what it means to be loved by someone who is not related to you... i have always been a loner, i have only 3 real friends of what i can talk about everything, we used to play videogames and it was fun, but someday it just stopped being fun, everything i do feels like nothing, i do not enjoy what i do whatever it is, i wanted to create comics so i started to practice drawing with books (got pretty good at it) but is just not fun!, it feels like a chore! also happens with music (i study music composition, not because i care about music but just because i have talent in this shit) all my theachers say that my pieces are very good in technique (harmony, tempos, rhythm patterns, etc) but they have nothing in them... like, meaning, purpose, soul, etc. i said that i only do what they ask me to.

i have never fall in love and i have never had sex (i'm 22) everything feels like.... pointless.

one day one of my cousins died (we used to hang out a lot we were really good friends) her brother (my best friend) was covered in tears while i was there, just... seeing, i didn't say anything, i didn't feel anything... i was like "man... it sucks that she died" but nothing else. i am dead inside, all i do is an act, everything!, smiling, caring for others, faking interest in people when i actually don't give a shit.

i do not remember the last time i cried (shit, it sounds like something from a movie).

BUT!.. non of this matter!, fuck people! fuck music! fuck everything! the moment you stop caring about everything, the moment you'll be free!

LIVE TO THE MAXIMUM AND HOPE TO DIE!... CHEERS!

>>724989280
I feel your pain. Seven days in and all I want to do is smoke myself into oblivion. At least there the pain is numbed somewhat. Still there, and filled with agony with each beat of my heart, but numbed. Dull. Bearable.

>>724975295
Humanity itself is pretty disappointing, why should you care about it's opinion?
Standards, rules, opinions and morale are all but a monolithic never changing construct.
A Rennessaince king could perfectly live your lifestyle (with girls) and be considered successful, because he was born.

Let me tell you a secret: You don't feel humanity being disappointed in you, that is actually you being disappointed in yourself.
That is one person.
This person is disappointed in itself, pretty stupid tbh.
The person should just get up and change, sit down, accept and live on, or
...there is no "or", killing yourself is pretty stupid, as long as you live there is a chance to change and if not, atleast you tried, just by living.
Also, the world is just too ridiculous to quit now, watching this steaming pile of shit is pretty entertaining by itself.
No, I'm not a 14 y/o edgelord, but prob some kind of low-key psycho.

So many of you are convinced that you lost "the one". What a load of shit. You lost a girl you were infatuated with at a young age when your were hormonally predisposed to do so. You all have a future. Just live it.

>>724989583
I'm 2 years without myself. I'm like a loony tunes character when I smell the shit now.

I don't feel like I deserve to feel bad. Like I'm wasting time, which only makes me feel worse. What do I do?

>>724974700
flirt more. tap her ass and whistle at her or some shit. flirt in a sexual manner and she's yours

File: Mhm.png (247KB, 326x383px) Image search: [Google]

247KB, 326x383px

>>724985957
>>finish chemE degree
in 3rd year of pursuing this degree, and i'm already starting to feel the emptiness you're describing.

Am I fucked anon? I want to go grad school as well.

File: 1488761364155.jpg (8KB, 244x206px) Image search: [Google]

8KB, 244x206px

I actually got a girls phone number today /b/ but I'm not happy or excited about it. It's like everything else in my life I'm preparing myself for disappointment. I'll text her in a day or two and she wont respond. I know this but I do it anyway. My life's been nothing but one long lonely depressing string of disappointments. My parents didn't prepare me for adulthood they were to concerned with putting me to work and Jesus. No one will ever love me /b/ I'm slowly making peace with that. I'm just trying to make other peoples lives better until my parents die then I'm going to kill myself. No reason to go on after that. I hate myself /b/ I hate absolutely everything about myself. Why couldn't I have normal parents who didn't hate each other.

>>724961537
Can you add me? Thiefofrage18

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ho1LgF8ys-c

I miss my dad.

>>724994315
What happened anon?

>>724994438
He passed when I was 23. When he left he thought i was happy. House, wife, job maybe kids. Shortly after he passed i got divorced and played vidya and screwed around for awhile. Now I still have the same house, same job, new gf and a baby. I wish i didn't lie to him. I wish he could've met my daughter. I won't leave my daughter like he left me.

>>724994966
Wow. I'm quite a bitch. You guys have it much worse.

>>724951537
I was in a very similar position a year ago. I took a semester off from Uni, lived at home and realized that I wanted to be dead more than anything. Nothing ever made me happy and nothing ever would. But instead of actually killing myself like I planned to I decided to keep living life as if I were dead. I chose something I wanted to do and I'm doing it now regardless of the consequences and likelihood of failure because I know if I didn't make this choice I'd be dead anyway.

Basically anon, if you're depressed and at the point of suicide, go full circle with it and use that realization as the starting point of a productive life as a human husk. It's been working for me.

>>724975784
>white people on /pol/

I hate to tell you this but like 1/3 of /pol/ racists are self hating Mexicans that pretend they're white

>>724974404
▲
▲▲

>>724991728
I had normal parents who didn't hate each other and turned out exactly the same. So that wasn't it.

>>724974700
You'll never get her. Give up before you ruin your life anymore by pursuing her. I made this exact series of mistakes anon. DONT FALL VICTIM. You'll never truly get over her but good god you have to try. If you have to, make her hate you to get her out of your life. It doesn't seem like it but you need to defend yourself.

>>724951537
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yKL16qr5ti4

>>724956303
Good luck anon, you have a /b/ro here shedding tears for you. If there is another world, I hope you find the happiness there that you could not find in this life.

File: IMG_2794.jpg (29KB, 640x430px) Image search: [Google]

29KB, 640x430px

>>724996482
>>724991728
What could it be then. Hmm...

is there anyone on steam I can just talk to about shit? Might not even be relevant to why I'm depressed, I just need to talk.

Don't bother replying/adding if you can't stand someone who's going to message you a lot. It's just how I am.

http://steamcommunity.com/id/179832173219871237891/

>>724950121
Its been a whiiile since i dont come to one of these threads

Ask a guy who went from being a total beta loser to someone doing "OK" in life anything.

I still have regrets about her nearly 10 years later. She's forgotten about me and gone on with her careeer and I'm still on the spectrum hanging out on the dregs of the internet.

>>724974404
▲
▲▲

>>725000703
amen bro. amen.

File: 1377404068909.jpg (18KB, 250x232px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 250x232px

I recently met a girl who is just fucking awesome.
Browses /pol/ , Plays games and is just fun to be around. Well my dumbass fell. She doesn't feel the same way. It hurts because she is the best thing in my life in a long time.

I don't know what to do. I'm tempted to just try and talk to her about but I'm too fucking retarded to come up with the correct words on the spot.

File: 1488433317963.jpg (216KB, 1280x1165px) Image search: [Google]

216KB, 1280x1165px

>>724985063
>I became the kid who was just a box of used goods tossed on the curb.

I wasn't ready for these feels..

File: 1488691174593.gif (1MB, 720x720px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 720x720px

>>725001488
Sorry I caused you those feels...that's what I still feel like sometimes.

The trauma from it gave me a sort of photographic memory. Not only do I get flashes of when it was happening from the PTSD, I also remember just about everything from my life (well I'd call it a childhood but I really didn't have one of those).

And they say elephants never forget.

anyone got that monkey island story?

>>724953274

Hand.Cannot.Erase

File: 1489033441784.jpg (62KB, 750x505px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 750x505px

>>725001905
I was sexually abused by two and touched by one so i honestly feel the same. I'm scared that I do the same even tho I know in my gut I won't and two it has made me anxious about sex. I don't want these feels anymore...

>Be 18
>Had asexual gf
>Buy her video games, play said games every day
>Everydays great
>One day get a feeling she doesnt love me
>"Hey. Question. Do you actually love me"
>"Well... Its not in the way you think. You're more of a good friend."
>There it is
>Several weeks pass and my personality changes drastically.
>Get really manipulative, If it's for my gain, i'll do it sorta shit.
>Friend starts dating tumblr bitch
>Pull some mental barrier shit and bed her
>Fucked my friends girlfriend
>She ment the world to him
>I never felt bad because of how I didn't give a shit about what I was doing
>She dumps him, lives at my house for a few days
>Starts going on 6 hour bus rides everywhere
>Weird bitch, but didnt care. Just played video games all day.

Will cont.

>>725002638
>Eventually told my asexual gf that "Hey, I fucked some other girl. Its my fault but I don't care.
>Suddenly I feel like shit
>It hits like a truck
>Ive been dating this girl for 5 years.

>Friend's GF starts acting weird, leaving school early, not coming home
>Begins to drain my wallet
>Can't afford to take care of her anymore
>Friend drives to my house
>Gives me a high five for having sex with his gf
>I asked him "Well. You can bust my jaw if you want. I don't really care what happens."
>"Bro, I just got you laid. I'm not going to hurt you man."
>Heavily confused, I go back to my room.
>Eventually, Friend and his hampig gets back together
>She leaves, said that i've treated her poorly.
>Don't care, makes sure she doesnt steal shit when she goes.
>Everything goes back to normal

Will cont.

File: 8MJXK3y.png (339KB, 959x543px) Image search: [Google]

339KB, 959x543px

Any House MD fans? This is the most feels by far in any TV show or movie right here.

Well lads, should I cut my losses and stop?

>meet girl about two years ago during football
>didnt pay much attention because she was pretty and I wasnt that good looking
>senior year we randomly have a class together, we talk
>lot of touchin and stuff, poking each other since we sit right next to one another
>leave class, we become distant
>its cool, never found attraction to people then
>graduate
>enlist and get ahipdate
>reminded of her by a friend of mine
>oh shit yeah what about her
>feel good because weight loss
>pretty sure i can pull it off
>ask friend to hook it up with her
>apparently he does try and she doesnt remember me

>>725000198
camus....was
right

>>725003136
Fast forward a few weeks

>Everything is just dandy
>Circle of friends are upset that I betrayed my native american friend
>He says not to worry, its all good
>Eventually, all is calm again

>Several friends come over a few days later
>We all hang out, I show my female friend where the bathroom is
>I come back to screeching
>I enter to my room to my friends gathered around my computer
>They found it
>My fucking porn stash!
>Think to myself "I'll just play it off, joke a bit"
>Nope.
>Swing at nearest friend
>Bloody his nose. Blood everywhere
>Oops.jpg
>Gotta commit, can't go back.
>Tell everybody to leave, act incredibly irate when i'm more sad that I assaulted my friend
>Play Witcher 3
>Its 11:00PM
>Knock on my window
>Its my friends.
>Not the 4 at my house.
>The 14 I haven't seen in years

Will cont.

>>725003333
Checking them quads

>>725003488
>Friend I hit is there
>Friend and Friend's hambeast is also there
>Friend from school
>Gay Friend
>All of them
>One is visibly drunk
>"Get your ass out here"
>I walk out of my house. No adrenaline, nothing. I don't care.
>"You can fuck anon's hambeast. You can act like a dick to all of us. but you do NOT hit any of us. Especially little anon."
>Go on an angry 15 minute rant on why I don't know what i'm doing. Don't know why i'm still alive. Don't know whats going on with me. Blame hambeast. Start insulting Hambeast
>"You're a fat manipulative cunt."
>"I hope you die in a ditch you fat bitch"
>Friend clearly sees i'm about to go apeshit and pretty much get my ass kicked by 12-14 people
>Calms down, calms me down
>Says "Its okay buddy, we all get worked up over dumb shit. Just come with us, we'll go get some food and chill."
>Okay.
>Food time passes, everythings calm

Will cont. Nearly done.

>>724954862
same case like urself here. just I watch memes all day instead of playing vidya. I always was this kid with lots of potential but with shitty attitude. Being a pajeet I think killing myself is the best thing I could do cuz overpopulation

>>725003941
Few months later
>Go on school field trip.
>Its exclusive, only best performing students can go
>Hambeast is there
>She gets aggressive, says "Shut the fuck up anon, nobody cares on what you have to say"
>Respond; "Thats not what you were saying in december"
>Everybody screams
>Teachers laugh
>High fives all around
>Girl I dont know laughs
>Who is this girl? Shes from an independent study program.
>On the bus ride to the event, was a symphony in our capital city.
>Being in a small country side town, amazed at all the tall buildings.
>Arrive at our restaurant for dinner. Amazing place, super fancy but still laid back.
>Don't get to choose where I sit. Have to sit next to large principal.
>And the girl.
>Start chatting up with her, learn a lot about her
>Eventually start dating
>Perfect girl for me.
>Do anything to see her
>Constant dates, intimate contact, ect.
>Eventually the feeling fades
>I ask the question

>"Do you actually love me?"

Will cont.

>>725004349
go on anon

>>725004349
Same faggot. Same story.
>She says "Yes, I do love you. Why would you ask that?"
>Mentally elated.
>Happy as can be, but can't show it.
>I want to be happy.
>Why am I not happy
>Eventually get evicted from drugden parent's house
The drug den is a different story, may tell if it demand is high.
>Have to move to big city.
>50 miles away from gf
>Decide that we split it off, since we are both losing feeling for eachother
>I never lost my feelings
>Now alone
>Gay friend lives nearby, hang out with him mostly and other friends on occasion.
>Friendship is not what I want. I want love
>Text ex-gf often, she is also sad
>But 50 miles away. Can't date, hate long distance.
>Begin to get depressed daily
>Realize why I got into such a shit-pit several months back
>I've been looking for love. Wasted 5 years just to be friendzoned.
>Fucked friends girlfriend to find love
>No idea why
>Doesnt work
>Dont give a fuck, got free puss
>Find perfect girl
>Both in love
>Seperate

>Mentally destroy myself
>Convince self that i'll never find true love
>I'll never have the perfect relationship
>That time has passed
>Everything is fine a few months later.
>Productive, mentally stable.
>Out of nowhere something hits me like a truck
>I am alone.

I have many stories. All interesting but poorly told. Some edgy, some not. If you wish for more, just demand. I'll tell it all.

>>725005265
I would love to hear more anon

>>724952119
I love everyone ITT

>>725005265
Bonus story from recently
>Dad is closet fag
>Also smokes meth
>Once gave me his sex cabinet, but forgot to empty it completely
>Dildo falls out
>Friends laugh, throw it on top of elementary school gym
>Recently find glass buttplug in bag that I packed clothes in for move
>No idea how it got in there. Didn't really care
>Gay friend wants it
>Friend's drive to senile grandmother's house in what we call a "Punjabi Party Bus"
>Its a cheapo van that was common in our shitty farming community
>Biggest indian population in California
>Yuba City, look it up
>Friends show up
>Have buttplug in sock, heavy as fuck
>Throw it on friend in backseat
>He screeches like a child
>Everybody confused, I laugh
>They just realized I threw a used glass methdaddy buttplug on my friend
>I buy food and the night is good.

File: ATT_1393981518226_photo 3.png (1MB, 725x990px) Image search: [Google]

1MB, 725x990px

FEEEL ANON, FEEEEEEEEL.


https://scowitchboy.bandcamp.com/track/memory-part-ii

>>724951537
Find a psychiatrist and start taking a prescription. I told myself I wasn't depressed for my entire 4 years of college. When I got out I was totally aimless and wanted nothing and the reality hit me like a ton of bricks. You can have good days and bad days but taking antidepressants has really helped me pick myself back up. There's no shame in it, you're just fixing a problem. When you realize that your head being out of order is the source for a lot of your issues things become a lot clearer and a path opens up to you where you previously thought there was none. You'll be able to start taking joy in what you used to like doing again

File: USMC.jpg (2MB, 1080x1920px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1080x1920px

I'm leaving for boot camp in a month and my depression and anxiety are coming back. I missed PT yesterday because of my retarded mood. I can't do a single pull up, guys. I'm a fucking failure. If I don't become a Marine, I'll have absolutely nothing left and it'll probably be my time to finally leave this fucked up earth.

>>725005265
Heres a neato story about the first time I got drunk
It was before I met "PerfectGirl.jpg" but after I cheated on asexual girl.

>Friend who I haven't seen in 2-3 years comes down
>"Motherfucker lets party"
>He has 600$ to spend. All on us
>He buys 200$ worth of alcohol
>300$ worth of weed
>100$ worth of chicken wings
>We fucking party in my friend's shed
>"Anony boy gets first drink"
>Hands me bottle of Kraken
>Looks like a fucking jug of moonshine
>Before they can hand me a shotglass, i'm already half way through with the bottle
>I dont feel a thing, so I must be hard to get drunk
>Drink more later
>30 minutes after first drink it hits me hard
>Really hard
>"F-fuck man. Shit just hit me"
>"Thats why you don't drink so much so fast dumbass"
>30 minutes later the second drink hits me even harder
>Everybody is shitfaced
>Everybody is high
>We go go-karting
>Perfect idea
>Eventually head back home in a drunken stooper
>Sleep on friend's floor and wake up at 6am
>Friend bro who bought all the alcohol drives us all home. While hes still drunk. While we are ALL still drunk.
>Go home, greet parents, sleep.
Oh, also my friend(who's girlfriend i fucked) slept in the shed after puking several times.

>>724981481
Ikr i usually never cry but this shit hits hard

File: 1483158959329.jpg (53KB, 353x504px) Image search: [Google]

53KB, 353x504px

>>725006568
I'm the asshole from >>725005265
I got over my depression sorta, and my anxiety at a young age. I know some may "Well, fucker, some people are not as gifted as you. Cunt" Well I agree with those statements, you have to try. Suicide is never the option to something that can be fixed. I believe in you, dickhead. Do your best, relax, and don't stress. You're a big goy, i'm sure you can handle it. Don't pussy out, do a pull up, dumbass.
-Faggot

>>725003333
Read the book stranger pretty much sums up how i view the world

I am really really sad today, I have realized that I am not a unique snowflake.

>>724953699
cheer up bosnian kid