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NZ/New Zealand thread.

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 262
Thread images: 61

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NZ/New Zealand thread.
>>
beers for dinner boys.
whats you having.
>>
>>724759656
homemade mc muffis.
>>
>>724759346

Not tonight dear, Ive got a headache
>>
>ITT: How many sheep have you fucked this week.
>>
>>724759656
I had beef and chips, really wanting/needing to expand my horizons though.

>trying not to have wheat
>>
>>724759656
A $5 Heineken
>>
Hey Q, do they accept tits and a timestamp as a valid form of ID?
>>
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>>724759656
some fish and chups from a chinese restaurant. I've always wondered why Asians are the one end up selling Fish and chips everywhere
>>
>>724759656
A want, then some indomie and a kitkat.
>>
>>724760566
Because it's what we buy. It's the same reason they make all the pies.
>>
why are ID's even gone?
>>
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>>724760518
Yes.
>>
>>724760566
a chinee restaurant?
nigga fish and chips are kids menu shit in a restaurant.
>>
>>724760724
Because you touch yourself.
>>
>>724760637
oh yeah that makes sense. I kinda forgot that there's other white people who buys takeaway.

If you lads ever in Christchurch, I reckon Captain Ben Fish and Chips. Probably the best in whole Canterbury
>>
>>724760825
You're not her.
>>
Went out with a Kiwi once. She was a cunt. Anybody know her?
>>
>>724759656
Gin. Having regret for breakfast.
>>
>>724760903
If I'm going to Canterbury it's to fuck a sheep, not for takeaways.
>>
>>724760951
Oh, you must mean tasha. Yeah we all know her.
>>
>>724761025
fucking tasha
>>
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>>724760981
I bet you're a fuckin Jafa who look down on everyone out of your shitty town
>>
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I accidentally stayed up till 5am last night playing Prison Architect. I made a woman's prison. Criminals with babies are fucking annoying, I'm glad when the other women murder them.
>>
>>724761158
Aussie, mate. And I look down on everyone equally.
>>
>>724761285
Bet you were fucking hard the entire time.
>>
>>724761285
Looks like my kinda game, though.
>>
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who is this?
>>
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>>724761285
You bet I was. Look at these babe's.

>>724761611
It's bretty gud.
>>
>>724761779
a faggot
>>
>>724761779
Me, why?
>>
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>>724759346
>inb4 climate change fag
>>
>>724761900
>>724761926
even faggot have a name.

also curious
>>
>>724761779
It's the "female" me....
>>
>>724761779
looking hot anonnz
>>
>>724762157

Thats a boys bedroom if ever ive seen one
>>
>>724762034
Do you want some boipuss?
>>
>>724762230
100% looks like mine, even have my amp next to me desk.
>>
>>724762239
sure.
>>
>>724762239
is that an offer?
>>
I don't like how accepting 4chan is of faggots these days.
>>
>>724762390
No.

>>724762437
We accept you, though.
>>
>>724761779
wonder if they are in a band?
>>
>>724762498
kek
>>
I looked through the documents, it's literally nothing. Huh, I wonder what all the hype was about. Pretty much useless stuff.
>>
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>>724759346
>>
>>724762626
>>724762688
Good memes.
>>
>>724762626
get woke
>>
>>724762688
Do you have that pepe?
>>
>>724761025
Nope. Though I did meet a Tasha whilst living in NZ. And yeah, she was a cunt, but not the cunt I was dating.
>>
>>724762905
What was her name? We only have 4 million people. I'm sure one of the 40 people who come here know her.

In addition, why aren't you posting her nudes if you hate her do much?
>>
>>724763026
Never got nudes. Broke up like 11yrs ago, long ol' time. Not naming her because the chances are someone knows her hahaha but her/her family are all from Nelson/Mapua. Pretty sure she's moved now though, but that's where she's from/lived at the time.
>>
>>724762858
Nope, was at my uni tho
>>
>>724763282
Oh her. She died like 2 years ago. She was living with HIV for like 12 years. Turned into AIDS
>>
>>724763360
had to leave early, wish i had been able to witness this gem
>>
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teh real mvp
>>
>>724763420
didn't even know it was happening - was Winne being a faggot to someone in the crowd? Said something about it in the ((media)). Called him out for stealing his limelight or some shiiiiett.
>>
>>724763441
hahahhaaha Buzzfeed BTFO!
>>
>>724763441
>hate symbol
Pepe dindu nuffin. He's a good boy.
>>
>>724763602
never saw anything like that.
>>
>>724763441
>yes, he does
Get rekt Buzzfeed
>>
>>724763441
Winnie is our own Trump, always has been. People need to vote for him. He'll Make Aoteroa Great Again. MAGA
>>
>>724763698
how diverse was the crowd?
>>
>>724763818

Hes not wrong about immigrants paying in for 25 years before getting the pension. If you turn up at 42 youve still got a lot of good years to work. Not so much if youre 47
>>
Dunedin reporting.

First day of Cricket was alright,i guess. Weather was fine af though.

We really needed another wicket before the end of day though.
>>
>>724764009
Diverse? at Vic? It was the people who sighn up to the political clubs and Me
>>
>>724763360
> I'm soooo tired after uni. i had to wake up at 11am and had two back to back lectures.
>>
>>724764194
How is cricket a sport? Wish I could get paid to stand around in the sun rubbing my balls.
>>
>>724764194
Do you agree with southee being dropped for this Test?
>>
>>724764367

Plenty of stms positions open in christchurch right now
>>
>>724764324
wut? why greentext?

>>724764265
>Diverse? at Vic?
whut
>>
>>724764473
because it's how every faggot student acts
>>
>>724764438
What's stms?
>>
>>724764408
He needed a break, IMO. However I don't think the first test was a good idea.

Second test, yeah sure.

>>724764367
How is golf a sport? yeah exactly.
>>
>>724763384
Good job I'm immune. Not surprising really, she's probably worked her way through your entire country by now.
>>
>>724764547
traffic management or something i think
>>
>>724764599
So not Sluts Touching My Sack? I'm out.
>>
>>724764547

The guys at the roadworks that walk up the cone line moving them all an inch to the left, then walk back down the line moving them an inch back....all day

Or the guys that hold the stop-go signs. They literally stand in the sun all day scratching their nuts
>>
>>724762688
ultra rare pepe peters easily 50$ on facebook buy and sell pages
>>
>>724764946
i will literally cuck you
>>
>>724764946
I've seen alot of female road works lately, mostly stop goers, i reckon they fuck all the other roadies and thats part of the contract agreement
>>
>>724765252
I don't like how they get paid the same amount as the men but are literally worthless for labouring.
>>
>>724765385
Women are the best labourers, men literally can't do it. My mrs was in labour for 36 hours.
>>
>>724765628
nice meme
>>
>>724765385
i know right, physically they are weaker but get paid the same in labour intensive jobs, plus the roadies get all this cock they crave as a perk. I want to work in an all female office get paid more obviously because im a male, and get all that middle age cuck & lonely 7 cats pussy
>>
>>724765806

Id rather have a chick on site with a can do attitude, than a guy with a cant do attitude
>>
>>724765628
that's not what he meant, fool.
>>
>>724766023
he was cracking a joke, fool
>>
>>724765976
nah you'd there'd be to much paper work to fire the chick from carrying her too much than with the guy
>>
>>724761779
someone with a messy as fuck room
>>
Seriously though, who has the Winnie pepe?
>>
>>724766280
you seem upset
>>
Ya'll mind if I make "philly cheese steaks" real qwik.
>>
>>724766909
The lego Ferrari is cool, not sure what the golden syrup is up to...
>>
>>724762688
some nigga gonna sell that rare pepe for 100k when this nigga makes pm.
>>
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Welp, gonna go smoke my last dart for a while. Wish me luck.
>>
>>724767180
some people use lube, some people use syrup man.
>>
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>Christchurch
>>
Dubs I post a webm of me cumming, singles I play Prison Architect for the rest of the night and most of the morning.
>>
>>724768510
Good, because I just came.
>>
http://m.imgur.com/a/dCxNj

do """alt right""" actually believe this shit? conservatism is one thing but this is just american-tier racism. cmon nz even gaynazi wasn't this retarded
>>
>>724768531
how do you clean up after you cum / what are your rituals?
>>
>>724768810
I wouldn't know what the alt-right believe. Nobody here is alt-right. Looks like some faggots trying to be edgy.

>>724768876
I have a cum towel that I keep behind my bed. I wipe my dick on it then have a vape.
>>
>>724768876
>Cum
>Whistle
>Dog enters

By the time he's gone it's all clean.
>>
>>724769104
Where can I get a cum whistle?
>>
>>724768876
>spray on my stomach / chest
>let it dry
>peel it off in sheets, roll it into a ball and throw it in the bin like a basket ball shot
>>
Someone please buy me this:
http://store.steampowered.com/app/332310/
>>
>>724769499
I can't buy it for you, however if you use a site like this, it's so much cheaper (you can probably afford it here)

g2a . com/lego-worlds-early-access-steam-cd-key-global.html
>>
>>724769654
I can afford it, I just don't want to buy it.
>>
>>724768876
She has a shower and washes it off
>>
>>724769911
Buy it for almost $30 off then at the link. save yourself some money and buy it.

By saying you can afford it, means nobody else will want to buy it for you.
>>
>>724770023
I just want someone to buy me something. I haven't gotten a birthday present in 5 years.
>>
Never forget, one of the best moments in NZ News History.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xv_pfIK60k
>>
>>724769941
found the virgin
>>
R I T A N O N
>>
>>724770606
No way?!
>>
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>>724770606
Where he at doe
>>
>>724770731
Hu dis?
>>
>>724770738
Ayyy I've been listening to Lana all day today :)
>>
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>>724771017
You heard her new song?
And is it really youuuu?
>>
>>724771168
To be young, and in Lo0oOo0ve! I love that song! And yeah it's me I just can't post pictures at the moment because I still have to use my phone but I will be able to can up with you guys again soon! Also, I may have to change my name. I've moved on from Rita. I have a new love now...
>>
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>>724761779
>>724762034
>>724762157
Boo!
>>
>>724771322
Come on tc
>>
>>724771337
hi! got any new pics?
>>
>>724771367
I want to but I'm on my iPhone and the app version is horrible! I will be back on tc in the very near future though! Who is this btw??
>>
>>724771500
Not at the moment sorry.
But i'm getting some more clothes soon soo...
>>
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>>724771322
Sounds a bit like Cigarettes After Sex, I dig it.
How've you been, fool?! We've missed you.
And go on, who's your new love?
>>
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>>724771500
>>724771587
well actually I do have this.
>>
>>724771706
noice.
>>
>>724771929
Gayyyyy.
>>
>>724771706
pls be in auckland
i'll buy you pizza and take you out
>>
>>724771337
Flying v?
>>
>>724771929
Ty
also
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3uBr0CCm58
>>
>>724772003
Im only half gay thank you
>>
>>724771654
I actually just found cigarettes after sex' music recently and have been listening to them too. I've been good, miss chatting with everybody on tc though. My new love... I'll give you a clue, she's a musician that's somewhat underground but well known and her stage name begins with a G. I'm guessing this is dunners (because the car?)
>>
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Wtf is this /b/.
Got given some at Homegrown on the weekend.
How do I get more?
>>
>>724772041
nigga you just went full gay. never go full gay
>>
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>>724772016
Chch sorry.
>>724772037
Yes
>>
>>724772153
Take it, or ill come over and take it.
>>
>>724772250
Sorry but thats way more sexy than them legs.
>>
>>724772300
Each to their own. ;)
>>
>>724772153
It appears to be a capsule, it most likely contains some kind of medication.
>>
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>>724772153
They're anti-depressant meds, if you only had 1 you literally wouldn't feel anything
>>
>>724772250
do you take it up the butt
>>
weed in south auckland??
>>
>>724772817
Only from toys so far.
>>
>>724772720
>>724772153
It's prozac. You would have to take about 20 of them at once for any kind of buzz. It will make your noodle limp for weeks if you do. Speaking from experience.
>>
>>724772895
If you want anything more than toys hmu
>>
>>724772973
>>724772153
Ha, I didn't even see the second part of his post.

>How do I get more?
Be clinically depressed.
>>
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>>724772127
Oh, good shit! You listening to all the stuff I do now, do you still fuck wit Bladee?
Giz another clue, mane. I've got no idea who it could be.
And yeah <3
>>
>>724772720
used to be on those, shit wouldn't recommend
>>
>>724773660
Yeah neither would I, but I hated all the shit i've been on and i'm currently on nothing so I mean, not sure if my criticism is valid.
>>
>>724773832
exact same boat here
>>
>>724773897
My condolences
>>
>>724759346
hello im from nz this is my youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41b5SvrTUYY no hate please /b/
>>
>>724774407
no h8, let's get her trending, will blow her damn mind.
>>
gnite b
fuck niggas get /b/itches
>>
>>724773536
Yeah man, you have good taste! Hahaha. I still like Bladee, but not as much as I used to hahaha. Ok, I'll give you another clue... She recently released a song with Janelle Monae (this is a giveaway!) hahaha. Do you still drive your skyline dunners?
>>
>>724760518
Huh?
>>
>>724772250
I'm in chch, and really want to cuddle with someone.. you flatting?
>>
>>724774689
saw your post on FB, wondering if you could just flash the dude for verification.
>>
>>724772250
im in chch
where you at
>>
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>>724774589
Fuck, I should've worked it out beforehand! I like a few of her songs too, yo. And the videos are dope.
Still got it, skrtt

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N9XKLqGqwLA
>>
>>724774773
No.

Night everyone.
>>
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>>724774880
>>724775244
G'night, kiwis
>>
>>724775244
fb?
>>
>>724774948
I feel like were slowly becoming more similar, hahaha! I love Grimes, she's so cool and creative. I think she's gorgeous too. Also, I love that version of realiti, I think it's actually better than the version on 'Art Angels'!
>>
>>724759346
G night. Getthelube.com
>>
>>724775556
I would have gone there and given you my credit card information if you didn't fuck up your quads.
>>
>>724774830
Who is this though? Tell me and I will.. even if it's a fb msg
>>
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>>724775343
I didn't know there was another version! I like that song and video though. I'm not a fan of all her stuff, but that's definitely one of my favourites.
What about The Hics? I kinda listened to them for a while but got into them recently.
And what have you been up to, man? What's new in life?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fakxhTwgILE
>>
>>724775771
You should know, I commented on the post.
>>
>>724775993
damn getting heated lol
>>
>>724775771
probably uke
>>
>>724776151
probably

>>724776098
what is heated about what I wrote?
>>
>>724775877

She made a different version for her album! I feel like her music is an acquired taste because it's quite different but I love everything she does hahaha. I haven't actually heard of the hics until now but I listened to that song and it's not bad! Honestly, not too much has changed man, my friend is moving in to my house this weekend though so that should be pretty cool. Hbu man anything new? I think Scotty told me you have a girlfriend last time I was on tc!?

https://youtu.be/Lveqodcepjs
>>
ok everyone show your buttholes and fannies
>>
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>>724776903
>>
>>724776903
I just took a runny shit that burnt my rectum. No.
>>
Going to NZ in 3 months, mostly around queenstown. Any tips on where to go?
>>
>>724776962
timestamp pls
>>
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>>724776514
This is pretty cool, but yeah, I think I like the single version more.
You still boosting your neighbours WiFi? Fuck, I don't even know what's new. How long has it been?
>>724776903
You first :)

>night riders, we out here
>>
>>724777134
If you're in the Queenstown area, definitely go over the hill to Wanaka. Do some Skiing if that's your fancy.

Go for a bit of a drive, towards Christchurch, if you're heading up that way, take the way which means you drive past Twizel and Mount Cook, it's quite a scenic way.

There's also a lot of Vineyeards / Winerys around that area, but idk about them during the colder months of the year.
>>
>>724777345
P.S. PLEASE LEARN OUT ROAD RULES BEFORE DRIVING ON OUR ROADS.

k thanks
>>
>>724777394
Our*
>>
>>724777182
Hahahahaha yeah sadly I'm still using my neighbours wifi! I should be back on Internet soon though and I can get back on tc with you guys. I swear it's been like a year! Anyway, I'm going to sleep now man, good talking to you again dunners, I should be coming on more regularly soon for some proper banter hahaha. May even come back on tomorrow. Have a good night dunners! :)
>>
>>724777394
>>724777345

Sounds good. I heard all your roads are single lane overtaking on highways. Not fun.
>>
>>724777552
Sounds good, man. Good to talk to you too! Cheers, have a good one too. G'night!
>>
>>724777615
Pretty much, yes. there's a couple of passing lanes here and there, but not nearly enough.

If you're not doing the speed limit, please pull over and let people pass you if you can safely do so.
>>
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>>724777153
Being this new.
>>
>>724778314
no timestamp
cant tell
looks hot tho, would prolly fuck
>>
>>724778408
......
>>
>>724778408
BEING THIS NEW.
>>
>>724778763
?
>>
>>724778872
see
>>724778868
>>
>>724778932
okay?
new since when?
>>
I've got three hours to kill. What do?
>>
>>724762688
Not all heros wear capes
>>
>>724769214
that's fucking gross my dude
>>
>>724769214
>not skeeting directly into the bin like a basketball shot
>>
>>724779116
I'm assuming they mean new since you're asking for my timestamp when everyone else knows who I am since I'm a regular here. Newbies stick out like dogs balls for many reasons and that is one of them.
>>
98 to go.
>>
>>724780052
not happening unless we shit post.
>>
>>724779852
that would just be a waste of good tasty cum
>>
>>724780103
Haha. As a mum I feel bad that I giggled and then saved this..
>>
>>724779894
oh yeah im a noob for this thread lol
>>
>>724780228
Well this is certainly a shit post
>>
>>
>>724780272
So is this and given the flavor of topics lately I think it's appropriate.
>>
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>>724780103
Let's go on an adventure
>>
>>724780455
will probably fall asleep mid adventure but okay
>>
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>>724780455
Everyone asleep and a motherfucker can't solve captcha's because the brightness is turned right the fuck down
>>
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>>724762688
I love you b/ros
>>
>>724780557
>free helicopter rides
Forty thousand keks
>>
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>>724780519
Glad you could come on the journey
>>724780529
What's everyone drinking right now?
>>
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>>724780636
>>
>>724780636
Was drinking bourbon
>>
>>724780636
Coca-Cola.... as per usual
>>
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>>724780686

>>724780715
Decent bourbon or just bourbon? And god forbid, were you mixing it?
>>724780734
Probably cold enough to just leave it on the floor to chill
>>
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>>724780822
Dubs Checkum
>>
>>724780822
Woody's... I need to marry a such man before I can mix my bourbs
>>
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>>724780911
Oosh. Is Today A Good Day?
>>
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>>724780946
>off by two
Today Was not A Good Day
>>
>>724780945
Rich*
>>
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>>724780945
>>724781011
Well you clearly got drunk enough regardless
>>
>>724780822
it's sitting on my desk currently, cold as shit.

Want thoughts on this from everyone:

Speed limit in school zones. it's currently 50km/h (unless otherwise stated, i.e. 40km/h signs). should it be dropped down to 30km/h in all areas with the "school" signs on the side of the road between lets say 8am and 9am and 2:30pm and 4pm? otherwise its normal 50km/h

Just an idea

Reason I say this is cause i seen a close call today in a school zone.
>>
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>>724781050
Yeesh
>>
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>>724781050

>>724781087
When I was in Aus I saw that they have this as a law, and fuck, it's the only speed limit they obey.
I thought it was 30km/h here as well, to be honest. It's bullshit that it's not considering you have to do 20km/h when passing a stopped school bus, even if you're on a motorway or something
>>724781135
Burger Kang
>>
>>724781207
I think it should be a law, fucking hell there's many of close calls I see daily driving home from Polytech.

another law (at least i think its a law?), i think that should be enforced more: if you are a pedestrian, and are within 100m (i think, might be 50m) you should HAVE to use the pedestrian crossing. so many people don't use them it's stupid. that is another thing that also pisses me off, especially when I was learning to drive.
>>
>>724781342
One rule about the crossings is the diamonds. If the car is behind the diamond you walk but if it's between the crossing and the diamond the pedestrian has to wait... Cunts just step out
>>
>>724781468
fucking agreed.

one I find really bad for this is down Great King Street, near BNZ/ANZ and Westpac etc.
>>
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>>724781207
Aus was a bit fuckin' loose, now I think about it. The boonies is just littered with blown tyres and dead 'roos. Even the Corolla's out there have bullbars.
And the truckies want to kill everyone. The speed limit is 120km/h there and the cunts are still going 20+ over.
>>724781342
Everyone disregards the close calls here. It's that old "She'll be right" or "It won't happen to me" attitude. Yeah, nah, mate. The laws are fine.
>>
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She could really drive, and she was qt.
>>
>>724781530
typical kiwi attitude towards......... everything.

You can apply that to most things in life, but there's definitely somethings you cannot apply it to.

Grandma died? she'll be right
House burnt down? she'll be right
Not drinking and driving? yeah nah mate.
>>
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>>724781636

>>724781655
Fuck, this cracked me up. Drink driving a shit though. Fuck people who do that.
>>
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>>724781705
>>
>>724781705
That's why you always see me sober driving.
>>
>>724759346
I've told you fucking Auscuck FAGGOTS to fuck right the hell off this board. This is an AMERICAN BOARD FOR FUCKING AMERICANS ONLY! Trump won and he is making the internet great again by preventing illegal cyber immigration! You have to go back Aussie fags.
>>
>>724781792
I'm sorry i can't read your post. My levels of freedom are too high.
>>
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>>724781759

>>724781764
My man. Doing a national service keeping those stupid bastards from getting behind the wheel.
>>
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>>724781792
Winnie > Trump

KIWI FREEDOM OP
>>
>>724781880
Only for my friend's though. They give me cash works out great for me. Little bit of pocket money.

Even better for them though csuse taxis WILL rip off drunk students
>>
>>724781866
Fuck off Aussie scum.
>>
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>>724781932

>>724781866
Operating on a dubs level of freedom
>>724781997
Taxis rip off fucking everyone
>>
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>>724782102
Fuckin' hell, lads. I shitposted so hard I skipped a bunch of shit to post
>>
>>724782102
Drunk people are easier to rip off, though. Quite a few dubs tonight
>>
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>>724782179
Wests are shit but I'd take one right now
>>724782202
/nzg/ repeating digit game strong
>>
>>724782240
Yeah the nzg
>>
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>>724782240
Yeah the boys
>>
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>>724782344
Yeah the dubs
>>
>>724781342
It's 20 metres you dumb fuck.

Also fuck up.
Stop being a little bitch.
>>
48 to go.
>>
Anyone bumping anything? Anyone even here?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpK2iTlPx9A
>>
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>>724782369
This was New Zealand. Looks pretty good.
>>
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>>724783037
>>
>>724759346
irrelevant country and people
>>
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>>724783064
>>
>>724783097
Irrelevant planet, irrelevant existence.
>>
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Don't think we're gonna make it, boes
>>
>>724783348
>boes
jk I'm the only one here
>>
>>724781087
shit isn't cold.
>>
>>724784581
Shit isn't particularly warm either.
Thread posts: 262
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