What'cha drinkin', boss?
Everything.
>>723667550
I'd like an Appletini, and easy on the tini!
whiskey sour and don't skip the egg white
Screaming Viking, cucumber slightly bruised
Milk, and only 2% I'm not trying to get crazy here
>>723667550
Milk and coke, please.
>>723667550
just milk sir
your finest of your dairy sir
A trashcan please, I don't want to remember tonight in about an hour
>>723667550
White russian
>>723667643
Oh geeze, Rick..
>>723668185
OH shit the night is gone brah!
>>723667550
Sprite, with extra salt.
>>723667550
Triple-distilled dihydrogen monoxide on the rocks.
a glass of milk with a dash of cream
>>723668239
>>723667550
Five shots of Jepson's Mallort
I hate my life...
>>723667550
Chasing UV Blue with Nos, don't really need to chase it but it is a tasty combo.
Was mad from work/the walk home so I immediately hit the bottle. What fun.
Dude, the bartender is gonna run out of fucking milk at this rate.
>>723667550
Water too young to drink
>>723667550
virgin rum and coke
A glass of piss, please... with milk.
>>723667550
3 shots of jameson
1 shot 4-horsemen
3 yuengling
>>723667550
Tequila on the rocks, make it so mexican that Trump shows up with a brick and some cement
>>723667550
Grape koolaid and robitussen. Shaken, not stirred.
Am I a nigger?
>>723668611
good man
>>723668753
Who's paying for it?
>>723667550
Tincture of potassium cyanide, neat
Do you have beer on tap? Or is that like a european thing.
malibu rum with milk
It's 4:25 a.m. Hit a joint 5 minutes ago and drinking Labatt Blue Dry. 6.1% of debauchery. Pic related.
>>723668477
that's THE gayest drinking combination I've ever heard of
Zyklon-B and Coke
>>723669132
I could probably come up with gayer, but when you get off work at 2am, you're kind stuck with what you have in the cabinet. Missouri alcohol laws are fucking stupid, can't wait to leave this meth-filled shithole.
an entire vodka bottle.
Horses Neck, please. But only 3 ice cubes
>>723667550
>>723668505
>trusting the milk behind any bar isn't expired
>>723668925
tap beer is shit.
A bottle of anything. And a glazed donut.
To go
>>723669627
Tap beer is SO much better than canned it isn't even funny.
>>723669627
Find a bar that actually has their lines & faucets cleaned correctly, makes a major difference
>>723669895
This
>>723667550
Irish carbomb.
>>723667550
Liquid.
There's an old trick that has probably worked at least once. It's about how to attract some of the hottest babes in the bar. Works best if she's not surrounded by lackeys
>Create image as indifferent and worry-free by talking primarily with guys you came with
>Hit on nobody, thereby making your actual "target" assume your just there for light-hearted merriment, not to get your dick wet
>Initiate conversation with "target" like so
>"Caitlyn [or any other reasonably cute name]? Is that you?"
>Kindly excuse yourself after she gives you a quizzical look, saying
>"So sorry, I mistook you for an ex of mine"
Hot girls at bars know that they're hot. Now this girl thinks you've banged somebody as hot as her. You are now effectively "in her league" as her, and she can't help but place herself in your "ex"s shoes. Then:
>Wait for her to respond so you have something to build off of
>Imply (with body language) that you're a bit embarrassed.
>Tell her you're actually relieved you didn't bump into Caitlyn (or whoever) since the break-up wasn't actually that amiable
>Hopefully she'll inquire or at least appear interested in your reluctance.
Saying that you two drifted apart and that she took it hard implies the relationship was good, therefore increasing your value. You don't look like a gossip if you don't say anything negative about your fictional gf; in fact, the being complementary of your "gf" demonstrates that you're a sweet guy. Then:
>Detach yourself in some way (check your phone, look back to your buddies, etc.)
>Initiate the "exodus" phase by using parting rhetoric like "well it was nice meeting you anyway!"
>Create a bit of silence before you walk away, then stop yourself to say one last thing
>"Kaleidoscope"
>Stunned and confused, She's perfectly primed for you to blurt out that you're really into Chicks With Dicks
And then realize that all the first letters of the greentext lines confirm it all.
>????
>Profit
>>723670200
Kek
>>723667550
an AMF
>>723669895
>canned
glass bottle you dingus is superior
>>723668759
Yes
>>723668864
THE BARTENDER GODDAMNIT
one can of spam, good sir!
>>723669666
CHECKIN EM
>>723671450
Check in your email
Gimme some absinthe