How do you clean up after you fap?

>>722755566
I don't need to clean up, I got someone who cleans up for me

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i just dont fap

I have a sock next to my chair on the ground disguised as laundry but I use it everyday to clean up my mess and after that i just put it back on the floor. I use one sock for about a month until it's hard from dry sperm

With wipes like a sane human being.

Let it dry into my pubes then go in for a shower

>>722755566
I dont

>>722755566
i let my dog lick it off me

>>722755566
> fap on the floor
> let it dry
> like all two months mom throws a hizzy fit and cleans the floor under my table making me feel ashamed a bit
> that's how I do it
Just fuck off you disgusting normies.

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>>722755566

>>722758168
i believe

>>722755566
ejaculate into hand, then wash hand

>>722755566

I have a heavy duty tissue or paper towel next to me and put it over cock when I come. Then flush it. Wash hands. No mess, no cleanup.

Flush toilet.

>>722755566
I let your mom clean it for me!

>>722755566
I dont, i do it like a sensible humanbeeing,
>Fap
>Put Napkin on belly
>When Climax press dick against Napkin
>Cum
>Pick up Napkin
>Flush it down the toilet
>Open Window to let fresh air in
>Cry and ask myself how i became such a failure
>Write suicide note
>Make noose
>Try to hang myself
>Slip out of noose
>Shit.jpg
>Call Suicide help hotline
>Turns out they refuse to help you with your suicide at all
>even trying to convince you not to do it
>Fuckthat.mp3
>Try again
>Fall with neck on desk
>Feel the pain ease, light comes
>Happyplace.bmp
>Awake you have been in a coma for 10 years
>paraleised from the neck down
>cant even whipe your own ass anymore
>mfw


at least thats how i jerk off

>>722758770
Same

>>722755566
jizz into hand
eat it

u normies

>uncut master race
>fap feels much better than cutfag's
>pinch foreskin second before cum
>majestic cum balloon
>empty load in toilet

>>722758951
why

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In a sock

>>722755566
Why is that cum as white as glue?

>>722755566
use a tissue for whatever misses my mouth

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>>722759010
omg i thought i was the only one

>>722758951
Me too its so hot

>>722759301
Really bad for your dick

>>722759161
This is the best answer.

one of the side effects of some medicine im taking is that I no longer ejaculate,
so I guess I dont have to.

I just cum in a tissue, wtf? isnt that like... the normal thing to do?

>>722759418
how?

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>>722755566
Interesting question: I have started to prop my laptop on the bathroom sink, and I jerk off into the toilet. Give the old head a little wipe, flush it away, no fuss no muss.

>>722759010
I'll try this today lol

>>722755566
When I was young I used to nut on my stomach and then eat it. Whatever was left I just wiped on the sheets covering the other side of the bed. Now I'm slightly less of a degenerate so I use a towel from the laundry pile

>>722755566
I eat it. Literally no downside to it (unless someone catches me in the act which probably won't happen)
>Easy cleanup
>No trace
>Protein gains
>Potentially kill more people than Hitler
>Tastes good after pineapple

>>722755566
i jizz into kitchen towels and then throw them in the bin, toilet tissue or kleenex seems to dissolve on mah dick and make the mess worse but kitchen towels are perfect.

I have this old t shirt I've been cumming on since 2013

>>722760101
gaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy!

>>722759671
http://www.steadyhealth.com/topics/is-preventing-ejaculation-dangerous

>>722760285
pics or it didn't happen

>>722759671
It can cause prostate problems and infections
>>722759988
Do not

I wank for a bit then when I want to cum I wrap a couple of baby wipes round my cock and jizz into them. Then fold up and dispose of, its a victimless crime

>>722755566
Checked. And I usually cum in my wife, but when I do jack, I'll usually do it in a dirty shirt and toss it in the laundry.

>>722755566
I like to jack off in the car on long trips. Nothing quite like an 80mph jizz. I try to shoot onto/into a napkin and use more napkins to clean up

Why do you fuckers use tissue? It sticks to your dick like goddamn super glue.

>>722759010
if you're uncut, how do you know faps feel for cut guys?

>>722760916
I'll usually jack on long trips too. I keep something around to cover up if there are others around, especially trucks. One time I wasn't paying attention and suddenly heard honking. Look over and a guy in a truck is waving and he winked at me.

>>722760298
>this kills the crab

>>722760275
same, every single word and article
sometimes i keep them for the next round(s) depends if i cum much

>>722761030
>logic

>>722759141
Mine recently became really fucking white like the picture. It weirds me out a bit. I don't think I've changed much, either. Eh, who knows.

>>722759141
When nofap 2 weeks

>>722762601
Changes back and forth for me

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>>722759010
I never thought of this
I'm gotta try it tonight for sure

>>722755566
Tongue

>>722760916
Have you even jacked off while drifting

I don't. When I am about to cum I press down on my taint. The come goes in your bladder and you piss it out.

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>>722756056
> use it everyday

Kek

>>722755566
cum on myself and get in the shower

>>722763837
every gotten an infection?

>>722764004
Never

>>722755566
I just bust into whatever pair of underwear I'm wearing at the time, drys in like 30 min to an hour, wash them the next day, I can't be the only one to do this

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>>722758770
That's the only way to do it

>>722764042
cool. I've been afraid to try retrograde ejaculation because all of the medical websites say it's bad news.

>>722759010
>pinch foreskin
>majestic cum balloon

Little dick detected
Kek

>>722760285
Post pics anon

>>722755566
tp, sniff cum on tp, throw in grocery bag/trash, browse for more porn, wash rinse repeat

>>722764286
I dunno, been doing it for 15 years with no issues. I have two kids so everything seems to still work.

>>722760959
works fine if ya still got skin down there

>>722759010
Anteater dick that's only appealing to gay guys lol master race

>>722759010
I'd kill myself If I was uncut lol. Literally watch any porn with attractive people. Cut dicks. Uncut looks retarded

>>722760101
this.
thought i was the only one in the world but it's the easiest way to dispose and i dont wanna get out of bed and wash my hands whilst attempting to sleep. cum gets dissolved with the acid in your stomach and you can get protein from it.

>>722765223
>I'd kill myself If I was uncut
you wouldn't just get cut? retard

>>722759838
I really can't believe she thinks thay she is black

>>722765345
Let him kill himself. He didn't think it through anyways.

>>722765420
wait until he realizes he was born uncut

>>722755566

I throw the sock in the hamper.

>>722758951
I think about it, but after I cum I lose interest, take off my sister's clothes, and feel ashamed.

>>722765223
Uh, they're cut because it's part historical and religious throwback and part to reduce sensitivity.
I've seen more than a few that weren't cut and they seemed to do just fine. If any woman actually freaks out over an uncut dick, they're a moron and should be avoided anyway. If you're a decent size and fuck them well, I guarantee you that they don't give a shit how it looks lol
>Enjoy your less sensitive and suspected small dick.

>>722755566
>Get weird fantasies while fapping about eating cum
>Cum on chest
>Lose all interest
>Clean with tissue
>Piss out window
That's my usual routine.

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>>722765558

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>>722765558
Aw shit, son. He gon be maaad.

>grab one of million empty pizza boxes in my room
>place under chair
>blow nut on pizza box
>put it back where it was when I grabbed it

I've used the same pizza box for about a month now, It's likely time to rotate to a new one honestly. Been doing it for years. Easy cleanup.

>>722755566
Throw out the corpse.

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>>722759010
>majestic cum balloon
And congrats on not being a cutfag and enjoying a properly functioning, complete dick
highfive.msi

>>722763970
>>722764207
I do these, as well as just shooting my load into a potted houseplant that nobody looks at

>>722755566
I wipe it on your mothers curtains

I lean back when I'm about to finish and try to shoot hoops into my own mouth. Then I rub myself on the carpet like a dog.

>>722761030
That is a fair question, but at the same time, it's also a fairly obvious conclusion.
It's like forming a callus on your hand-over time it's desensitized. Cutfags will never know the extra pleasure.

>>722765787
If you really want to enjoy it, there are three easy ways get some hot fresh cum while you're still endlessly horny.

1. Milk the prostate. It's a great time and you'll have some fluids to east and play with.

2. Ruined orgasm. This takes practice and can be mildly frustrating, but yields far more cum than milking. The trick is to stop stimulation before orgasm, but after the spinal reflex fluid release. We're talking fraction of a second window. If done properly, you'll simply leak 50-80% load and still be chomping at the bit.

3. Involve other men. But that's gay, and you don't sound interested.

>>722755566
Been cumming on one towel for 2 years.

>>722760285
No pics, i believe you.