tell me about your dungeons and dragons characters

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>>719939678
>Atheist Jew nigger dwarf who hates gays and robs goyims and is a cleric
Travels with
>gay ranger elf
>mute warlock teifling,
>human who literally fucks up all the time and is a functioning alcoholic autist (warrior),
>badass female dark elf paladin who saves everyone's asses usually, >generically charming and badass rouge half elf who gets insane lucky rolls all the time

just some dude who goes around and collects the foreskin of his slain enemies

>>719939678
>CN rogue human girl with daggers and is semi retarded (intelligence dump cuz dumb)
>LG war priest human with weird ticks
>CN dwarf druid retard with mountain lion animal companion
>CN awesome as fuck half orc barbarian skull collector
>LE human wizard who is now dead (fell into a hole)

quads

▲
▲▲

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>>719939678
I don't have one because nobodies plays unless I DM.

>>719939678

The most boring and generic sword and board fighter; scarred face, scruffy beard and a tattoo of some mercenary company he was in a few years ago.

I dont play dnd but I do play through the Breech. The Malifaux RPG. Currently I play a super redneck gremlin (it's a steampunk universe) that while charming as fuck is more use to living with his "brother" Marshal and his trusty steed Maggie the 12 food gader'. Ive already managed to stop two warring factions simply by mentioning that there is a party about to start and boose will be a'flow'n. And in a weird twist the traps around his former house is what killed my previous character.

>rogue Strong Wymyn with her Partner(s)
>Sapphic Wiccan priestess that is always wet
>numale ally with chastity cage of invisibility
>fabulous as fuck eighth-orc penis inspector
>human man who is now flexisexual (fell into a gay watering hole)

>Druid
>Diet consists of mushrooms, any animals I find on that day and asmuch wine as I can haul with me.
>Eventually get a warhorse as my companion
>Ohboyherewego
>Buy longspear
>Get spider climb
>Run up any object and poke things from above

Oh and my other party members are 3 barbarians.

>>719944181
Are you just horny all the time or what
damn dude

Ng duelist that sleeps naked and once punched a bear to death naked. Also strangled a man to death with an eel.

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>>719939678

>mute, disfigured dwarf who believes he was called by god himself to whoop ass
>war-weary veteran cavalry centaur who can't shake her addiction to bloodshed
>pacifist cleric who travels the land increasing crop yields and purging evil spirits (one-off character for the tomb of horrors)
>current PC, a 2edgy4you paladin of kord who joined up with the city guard despite having zero knowledge of or respect for the law

Been DMing for the last couple of years, but I'm very excited to play my horribly minmaxed charisma snowflake.

>socially awkward dwarf monk who has 20 in 3 different stats

>>719939678
pathfinder rule set
>halfling
>cavalier - dashing general
>can stay mounted indoors because wolves and riding dogs are medium creatures
>was born a slave
>liberated young
>grew up in a "bandit" band that freed slaves
>now working on finding some where for the "bandit" band to move where they won't be hunted for opposing slavery

once played an int 4 paladin with a half-celestial mount
the party basically told my horse what I should do and the horse kept my character from fucking up big time

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Hurrdurrr

>>719940425
>atheist
>jew

Does not compute.

>Gnome Wizard Necromancer
>Pervert
>Sketches charcoal pornography drawings for money whenever we enter a tavern
>Specializes in Goblin porn

>half-orc barbarian
>named gor-gor
>short, stupid and strong as fuck
>one time, we were fighting rust monsters and his sword rusted away, so he picked up one of the rust monsters and beat the others to death with it.
it was an interesting game.

In 4th edition in ages long past I made a pacifist cleric that worshiped a home brew the god Athe. He was the god of balance and logic......... and a proper asshole. Every time I prayed to him I would get what I asked for, but get it with a twist. Athe I need to find this book in this huge library WHAM book falls and knocks my character out cold for an hour till another PC finds me and the book and he just walks out with the book and leaves me to sleep off my hard work. And he started drinking a lot to deal with our no charisma fighter, and by the end when we confronted our big bad, I looked directly at our big bad and dropped my last bottle of booze and looked him in the eye and said now im serious. The big bad laughed and asked how breaking a bottle meant I was serious.

The life of a cleric sigh.........

>>719939678
Highly charismatic kitsune ranger with very low interest in the rest of the party, was abandoned in a forest at a young age and as such has little understanding of how to interact with others, Cn alignment as she does whatever she wants without thinking through consequences, gets along with the rest of the party due to them helping her escape a demons lair

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>Gnome wild magic sorcerer
>Lived under a rock for 150+ years
>batshit crazy
>finds snail shell with a demon lord in it
>multiclass to warlock
>blow shit up with fireball
>consistently get dick stuck in traps
>leader of the grand inquisitors of a random cult
>naked at social gatherings
>sacrifice bitches to gary the demon lord
>used spider climb to run around ala pic related
>combine previous with abyssal shouting for intimidation

bonus character
Aasimar paladin of Torm
>holier-than-thou
>hates gypsies
>essentially a violent Jehovah's witness
>played in CoS

>>719947753
>>"Pacifist character"
Why do retards do this ever...

I would but I'm not a complete faggot who plays Dungeons and Dragons

>>719948978
helps force the (vastly underdeveloped) social mechanics of the game
also keeps the game from ending because all the intelligent races unite to bring the worst serial mass murderers in the worlds history (aka the PCs) to justice

>>719948978
Pacifist cleric garnered a fair amount of healing advantage, and when I have a crazy barbarian who did the damage of 2 PC's I was ok with this.

>>719949256
>I jack off to traps like a real socialite

>>719949395
As long as all I was doing was healing the damage done by others, Athe seemed alright to this. Never get your own hands dirty.

>>719949395
which works fine up until the point that a high charisma and intelligence baddy convinces your character that by constantly healing the barbarian instead of letting him die of his wounds, the cleric is as morally responsible for the violence done by the barbarian as the barbarian is

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>>719939678
I have a level 43 your mom, she sucks my dick with 100% accuracy, +5 speed, and -1 charm.

>>719949256
I thought D&D would be stupid and avoided playing it for several years until I finally checked it out. I found out it was actually a blast. 8 people getting together and drinking beer and eating pizza and generally joking around and having a good time.

>>719949630
By the end of the campaign I was probably less a pacifist and more a lawful fuck it due to the alcohol. I was more likely to let the fighter die then the barbarian because at least the barbarian had some respect for the foes he killed, where as the fighter was more of a beat them until moral improves.

This was also a character I last played something like 8 years ago. Everything seemed to work out in the end.

Well I had a party a few years ago with some friends that went something like this.
>me, Half-elf paladin who ended up impregnating a sucubi with the earthly vessel of the death prince orcas on a bad roll
>a dragon born warlord who gained a sentient axe
>axe is clinically depressed and often begs friend to break it
> a human bard
>friend who plays him was retard
>always charged ahead of tanks
>opened up door to room full of drow
>promptly shuts door and never walked away from group again
> a human cleric that became an atheist on a bad roll.
And then a Druid and a ranger who for the most part didn't do anything stupid or unremarkable.

The reason we rolled and weird shit happened was because we were all new players and the DM took pity, so he wrote up a sheet of instances of things that could happen in case of death, or ones rolled

Instances being things like
>sudden hate of librarians
>disbelief of polar bears
>spontaneously combusting enemies
>sucubi encounters (like mine)
>the sentience of a weapon, that will become depressed
Lots of other shit, don't actually know if that's regulation or not. Never looked into it nor do I care to. Haven't ever played again since then anyway.

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>>719942696
The pain is real

>>719940614
Mitchel?

>>719948620
My character is a gorilla

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>>719939678
>Human Cardinal/Paladin (Story choice)
>Chill old guy, loves jokes
>Hates evil outsiders with a burning passion, everything else can be negotiated or redeemed
>Can't let go of his preacher days, holds sermons for the party and for townsfolk that they happen by
>Doesn't constantly accuse people of evil
>Adventuring because he lost his son to a demon, hopes the pilgrimage will help him save others from that fate

Already ended up greatly renown by common folk as a wandering hero. The elven empire hates the shit out of him for destroying their demonic animal breeding racket and burning the entire camp to the ground. My end game is to get him to sainthood.

>fourth ed
>tiefling charisma rouge
>break into household of dreuger to find out what's going on
>great stealth rolls
>until I get to one room
>wake loli dreuger girl (so she's 30 something)
>she pulls out axe
"Hey baby, wanna walk on the wild side?"
>roll bluff
>nat 20
>end up getting her to tell he fiance all about the dreuger's evil plans
>she helps her fiance kill her family
>we end up getting married
>she follows me around the rest of the campaign as my person murderous clingy sex doll

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>>719939678
Four tard handlers and a supreme idiot. This guy got a party member killed for fake gold and decided to split thinking he could retire on said fake gold.

>>719952053
>person
personal
dyac

>>719948733
That sounds fucking hilarious. That gnome must have been a blast to have in the party.

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>>719942696
Sad...

Just started. Half-elf fighter who knows a shit ton about the world but doesn't know half a shit about what to do with that knowledge. Decides to fight to help understand himself better. Can't progress very well because traumatized because when he was young he accidentally killed a kid in a duel. Wields a glaive.

I'm the cleric that heals our goliath barbarian that has a ridiculous amount of strength and created a gnome/dwarf holocaust and auschwitzed our starting town for being too short

>>719953938
awesome

Size/Type: Large Magical Beast
Hit Dice: 5d10+25 (52 hp)
Initiative: +1
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class: 15 (-1 size, +1 Dex, +5 natural), touch 10, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +5/+14
Attack: Claw +9 melee (1d6+5)
Full Attack: 2 claws +9 melee (1d6+5) and bite +4 melee (1d8+2)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks: Improved grab
Special Qualities: Scent
Saves: Fort +9, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities: Str 21, Dex 12, Con 21, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills: Listen +8, Spot +8
Feats: Alertness, Track
Environment: Temperate forests
Organization: Solitary, pair, or pack (3-8)
Challenge Rating: 4
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always neutral
Advancement: 6-8 HD (Large); 9-15 HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment: —

>be me elf rogue first timer
>on party with orc warlock and human warrior
>i become a vampire rolling bad
>mothefuckers tries to kill me
>consistently manage to avoid death and turn everyone over the course of 3 hours
>everyone hates me // are having a blast
>ended up becoming vampire prince of the region taking all the castles and defeating all the armies on the land

never played again but it was one of the most fun experiences i had ever had.

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>>719953909
That sounds like it's pretty ripe for character development. I hope your campaign goes well, half-elf anon.

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>>719954564

>crazy kobold campaign for when we needed a break from our main campaign
>happened in same continuity
>kobolds were following these evil mass murderer smoothskins (aka the PCs from the main campaign)
>I played a "cleric" of bahamut, actual class was fighter
"Why?" you ask
>was raised by human that thought anything could be taught to be good
>it sort of worked
>my character understood that smoothskins kill kobolds bc kobolds are evil
>so if kobolds worship good gods kobolds would be good and smoothskins would no longer kill kobolds
>doesn't actually understand what good acts are or what any of the good gods want their followers to do
>knows bahamut is a good god and a dragon
>thinks kobolds are dragons
>thinks that because he's now "worshoping" bahamut, then anything he thinks should be done is the will of bahamut
>runs away to save the kobold race
>finds kobold village that the other PCs just finished slaughtering
>other kobold PCs show up
>all pissed about the death of innocent kobolds
>bahamut must want me to kill these murderers because he made me think that I should kill these murderers
>entire game my character keeps trying to perform miracles (cast divine magic)
>more often than not something somewhat good for the party happens when I try to cast
>no one in party can track
>lose the other PCs on day 1
>end up slaughtering entire nations (aka a few isolated farmsteads) because they are harboring (aka honestly telling us that they have no idea who we're talking about) these evil murderers
>level up enough we can take on orcs and shit
>subjugate a tribe
>convince them to go on a crusade in the name of bahamut (mainly because they don't see any difference between a crusade and normal pillaging raids)
>crusade/raids are successful
>recruit more orc tribes
tbc

>>719955640
continuing

>end up occupying most of the nation the other PCs retired to
>end up facing off against the other PCs
>all kobolds were all minimum age when this started
>other PCs all started just short of middle aged
>throw in a couple instances of accidentally getting tossed into the future
>kobolds are in their prime
>other PCs are all elderly
>manage to face them one at a time
>tear through the hitty-punchy other PCs
>find the first magicy other PC
>get destroyed bc wisdom goes up with age

>>719954764
Thanks, man. I made him the grandson of my last campaign's guy, which was about 1300 years ago. That's the guy who taught me so much about the world. I gotta find him though.
It was actually pretty cool starting - we found a tavern and I joined some people arm wrestling who didn't think I should be there, I said 'I'll throw down 3 gold, if i win I get half back and get to stay. If I lose I leave and you keep my gold.' I beat a half-orc who promptly told me to 'Piss off' and left, and someone threw in 3 extra gold, and I got all my gold back. FeltGoodMan

>>719948620

win

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one campaign I have a fire gensai monk/fighter and another I have a half elf ranger

16 year old generic emo/scene looking chick that's always angry 24/7.

The best character in our party is Tyrone, though. He's a black man that lived in the hood until he was 14 when his parents were killed, and he was adopted by a white suburban family. He then became a white supremacist, but if he eats fried chicken it basically has the same effect spinach had on Popeye and he goes back to his hood days for a bit.

What do i read to get started on this?

>>719956800
the players handbook

>>719956800
pathfinder is a variation of D&D 3.5
rules are similar due to the Open Gaming License used for 3.5
setting is very different for the same reason

>paizo.com/pathfinderRPG/prd/

>>719939678
One time I had a humanoid Velociraptor named Aetherius who could control water and steam to the point where could fling water pellets like bullets.

>>719958353
It was a casual game.

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>>719949474

>>719959116
Thanks

>>719958148
Thanks Will look into ir.

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>>719942696
I know those feels.

>>719959404
just remember that pathfinder is similar to D&D 3ed and 3.5ed, not 4ed and 5ed
4 & 5 became pen and paper WoW

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>>719959620
That picture can be pretty accurate sometimes. Dear god can being a GM be difficult, especially if you have players that can get easily sidetracked..

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>>719956800
Go to /tg/. They have meetup threads, go to one at a Local gameshop. Or just go to a local gameshop and ask.

>>719959700 I haven't played WoW, but it did it feel like skirmish ttwgs? That was 4e for me.

i ahd an idea for a DnD char, but i've only played the game once for a couple of hours, so im not sure if it would work, or even if it's pretty common.
the idea is to basically play the game as an enchanted weapon, and you take controll of whoever is holding it. all the while trying to hide that fact from the rest of the party.
would this work? is it lame? been done before? i got the idea from reading that DnD story about the bear guy.

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>>719942696
I relate to this post

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>>719960011
It's like herding cats.

>>719939678
My fave character a fat greasy level 76 virgin who's parents are ashamed of him and is allergic to women.

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>>719960128
Talk to your DM about it. Maybe have a "swordbearer" type character that it can default to. Perhaps a Warforged built for it even! If you constantly switch characters, you should be willing to do the work to write up their character sheets, since the DM already has enough work.

>>719960083
>did it feel like skirmish ttwgs?
haven't played those
but I have a couple friends that are really into warhammer
the little I know of the mechanics
4ed seems pretty similar, just scaled down from an army to a character

>>719960128
As long as the Game Master approves it, it could be interesting. Just make sure you don't turn that into the only noteworthy point about your character. Gimmick characters are only worth it as long as the joke is funny, and people stop laughing at the same joke.

>>719960128
the mechanics for intelligent items do allow for that
the item has an ego score
every so often the item and its wielder make an opposing ego vs charisma role
if the item wins several consecutive rolls it controls the character

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>>719960518
If WoW and 4e feel the same, I guess so. I was wondering on WoW's part.

It always felt easier for me to roleplay in 3.x, DM or PC, compared to 4e. It was such a slog to get through fights.

>>719960128
Since Living Weapons are an item type in DnD, the way I would work this out for a player is by having them make a PC and then a Living Weapon, each with a distinct personality and maybe conflicting alignments to make it interesting. Every long rest, have them roll a d20. 1-10 stays whatever personality is currently in control, 11-20 switches to the other. Could also have them roll a personality switch check every time they take damage over a certain percentage of their health to make it a bit more interesting.

Now I want to write up a homebrew class for this. Thanks anon

>>719959700
>>719960083
>>719960518
4e is okay for people who are really combat and crunch-oriented. It can be fun for those kinds of people who want the main focus of their game to be battlefield strategy (or just plain ol' murderhobo antics). This doesn't mean you can't make the game less about combat, since it's the GM that really controls that flow. But the mechanics of 4e are streamlined to the point that it's far better at just moving a figure around a map to attack other figures than it is to talk to things.

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>>719961090
That is exactly it!

>>719960832
>It always felt easier for me to roleplay in 3.x, DM or PC, compared to 4e
same here
I think it is because WoC got rid of so many skills and reduced the scope of the few that remained
skills have always been what fills out the character's background story for me
so much so that when I GM I always give the PCs a bonus to skills that I feel are appropriate to their fluff

>>719961215
GM bonuses are nice. It also gives incentive for players to actually use the skills essential to their backstories. Good on you, anon.

>>719961215
It helps if the group has talked about what kind of game they want to play too. My first foray int ttRPGs was 4e, and man it was a clusterfuck.

>>719949049
roll i dont play dnd but llike hearing about it

>>719960507
>>719960665
>>719960746
>>719961020
i was thinking that it could be a curse or something that prevented me from telling people that im a dude trapped in the sword, and that when the party eventually figured it out, would then give them a quest to free me or something.

thanks for the tips, if i ever get to play again i'll try set it up with the DM

>>719961090
agree with most of that

>This doesn't mean you can't make the game less about combat, since it's the GM that really controls that flow
as a GM it is also your responsibility to select a rule set that works towards the type of game play you want
so saddling yourself with rules that don't is just shooting yourself in the foot

>>719961640
and on that note
I've been wanting to play a game with my group using Wu-Shu rules
it takes a very minimalist approach to what is needed mechanics wise
and relies very heavily on the game's canon material

>>719961640
That is certainly a point that should be taken into account! Every game has a certain system and overall theme that should be relatively compatible with what the GM wants to run.

The Dark Lord Chad Jenkins: Professional Dickhead
High Charisma
Low Intellect
Rouge
Tries to fuck anything that's stacked. Usually fails.

My best D&D char is
>bilbun jimbles
>24 year old monk
>jacks off all the time and punches shit
He travels with
>a giant tree paladin with a monstrous cock
>a tiny goblin thief that knows magic
>mfw goblin stole 200 gold right off bilbun
>mfw goblin was my brother
>mfw

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>>719962492
My favorite class!

>lawful good human cleric, holds trials and delivers harsh judgment to evildoers
alongside
>human rogue who likes to rush in to trouble and get his ass kicked
>human fighter who is somehow proficient at fighting with every fucking thing he touches
It's really fun when we go into caves and I'm the only one who bothered to bring a torch

>>719963033
Your DM needs to use some Heroes of Horror. They will never forget a light source again.

>>719939678

>5e Dwarf monk
>Functional alcoholic
>has to stay drunk or gain a level of exhaustion from the hangover
>3 level druid dip
>turn into a bear and do kung fu
>i am kung fu panda

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>>719963282
I like it, I'll suggest that

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>>719939678

Lol faggots

>>719939678
Looks like that dwarve got, AXED

>>719964071
12th level faggots.

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>>719963949
It greatly improved my ability to immerse the players. Once I read it, my players really started to pay attention and even roleplay a little.

>>719953938
I salute you, Vulcan!