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My girlfriend of the past year has been talking a lot about open

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Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

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My girlfriend of the past year has been talking a lot about open relationships lately. I'm intrigued.
Should we do it, /b/?
>>
y
>>
She's already cheating on you. This is not an off-base assumption. She's already either actively cheating, or actively searching.
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>>719673521
Not be a cuck
>>
reims
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>>719673839

I'm fairly (+90%) certain that she's not currently cheating on me. Her parent's have had several messy divorces and both her exes have cheated on her big time. She is very much against cheating. About her being "actively searching" though, that's probably another story - she has told me that she sometimes thinks about sex with other men or women. But if we agreed on an open relationship, then that wouldn't be cheating.
>>
Establish groundrules! That shit is the black belt in sexual martial arts
>>
A little more background info:

My GF has not had a lot of single time in her life (we are both 23). We love each other and have very similar ambitions for our future in terms of family, lifestyle etc. Right now, we can both very much see ourselves having children before we turn 30. But given that she hasn't had a lot of single time, she's scared that she might one day regret having "missed" some stuff in her youth, or that she might break it with me to be more "young and free" and then later regret not staying with me. She is also bi-curious, but has no experience with girls.

As for me, I value the relationship and our future together higher than the implied unfaithfulness of sleeping around. I'd rather that we have an open relationship than no relationship. Also, I'd love getting to fuck other chicks once in a while, and still being able to cuddle up with the girl I love and want kids with.
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>>719674601

Can you elaborate a bit on that?
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>>719673521
Ground rules dude. Had an open relationship with a girl. Only rules were she don't fuck anyone I work with, and I don't fuck any of her female friends. Best sex of my life. Got to go out, fuck everyone, come home, fuck her. Nothing hotter than both of you recounting other sexual shit you did with other people while youre balls deep in her. Play no guilt. I've cheated on every girl I've ever been with except her, cuz it was allowed, so it wasn't cheating, didn't have our come up with excuses about what I was doing or who I was with. If I was out fucking some slut from a club she wanted to hear about it, would turn her on.
>>
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sJLIbtLXqd4
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>>719673521
Yes, if you can suck your own dick becuase that's the only way you'll be getting it sucked.
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>>719673521
If you're able to get extra ass do it.

If you're not likely to get any extra ass, don't do it.
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>>719675320

Sounds pretty cool. That's what I imagine (hope) it would be like. But pretty often it's a different story.
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Girls can fuck other men easier than guys can fuck other women. Don't do it, OP.
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>>719675551

depends on who you are, my friend
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>>719675079
I know two couples that are very happy in their open relationship. Me and my gf of 4 years 'only' have threesomes but basically the same shit applies. Sit together and think about what would hurt you and with what are you okay? Only fucking strangers? only friends? do you tell each other when you have a date or do you do it without telling? how often are you allowed to meet strangers? But most importantly: Expect to get hurt in some unforseable way, and when that happens be prepared to forgive your partner while making it absolutely clear that you are hurt. You propelled your relationship in a minefield with the potential to have an awesome experience. If you are lucky this will even deepen your relationship with your gf. If not don't be too disapointed.
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>>719673521
she's either currently cheating on you or is waiting for you to agree to an open relationship or not and when you don't she'll dump you. I recommend just getting out now.
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I'm sorry your gf is cheating on you, OP
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>>719673521
Like everyone else here, I agree she's either already cheating on you or she is planning on it very soon. If you're a cuck faggot, which you probably are, then you will agree to the open relationship and then she won't let you see anyone else. It will turn into just her fooling around on you. Get out now and save yourself from the drama.
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>>719673839
this
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>>719673521
open relationship means you dont love each other.

sure you enjoy fucking and even hanging out a little bit

but ify ou loved each other you would be content and she wouldnt be convincing you to let her go out and fuck every guy she feels like.
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>>719675023
So she wants to see if there's someone better out there for her, but if not, she still has you to fall back on. Sounds like a great girl ya got there..
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>>719675320
Why aren't you still together?
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>>719676687
Why shouldn't she have the right to see what else is out there? OP doesn't own her.
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>>719675023

So she wants to see if she can find someone better to settle down with and still keep you as a safety net.

Well done OP on being a massive faggot.
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>>719676949

Cuck detected.
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>>719676949
Are you being serious? Her "seeing what else is out there" means she doesn't think OP is good enough for her. She should just break up with him. It's called respect for each other and respect for the relationship. Maybe if you ever have a girlfriend one day, you will understand.
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>>719673521
None of these idiots know what they're talking about. They've probably never been laid, and if they have had sex their partners probably left them because of their crippling insecurities.

Being in an open relationship has been wonderful for me. I don't have to rely on any one partner to provide all of the things I need from a partner, I also don't have to supply absolutely everything my partners need, and I've had more weird fun sex than anyone deserves to have. It's not right for everyone though. You have to ask yourself a couple of questions:

1. Why do you want an open relationship? If it's just to fuck other women, you might want to break up instead. Being single brings way more freedom than an open relationship, and there are probably more monogamous girls than polyamorous ones today.

2. Are you a jealous person? I'm not asking if you've felt jealousy, everybody has at some point. I'm asking if other people would describe you as jealous or controlling. Because if so, again open relationships aren't for you.

3. Do you have crippling insecurities? If you feel insecure about yourself, your body, or your personality, an open relationship probably isn't for you. It'll amplify that shit until it's a real problem. If you can't manage your own insecurities in a "normal" relationship, you certainly won't be able to in an open relationship.
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>>719676998
>>719676687

We have already agreed that if we do try an open relationship, it's random one-time sex only - we will not be allowed to just "hang out", be fuck buddies with or date other people. Which means the probability of her finding another boyfriend wouldn't be much higher than it is now, with her going to school and work and talking to other people every day. We still spend time together almost every day of the week and the relationship is working well with lots of love and trust.

As for her being able to benefit more from an open arrangement than me, I'm not sure about that. She has been with 10 guys before meeting me - I've been with over 50 women. I haven't had problems getting laid, and she has had pretty high barriers - she doesn't just sleep with anyone.
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>>719673521
>My girlfriend of the past year has been talking a lot about open relationships lately
That's because you're in one, and you don't realize it yet.
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ht
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>>719677839
This
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>>719673521
"I'm bored with fucking you so I want to fuck other people and you're just going to have to get over it."
>polyamory in a nutshell
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>>719677839
Dubs of truth
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>>719677981
what dubs?
>>
Hello new friend. I am sorry to break it to you but she is already cheating. She is talking about open relationships to try for a get out clause for what she already up to. It's time to end it OP, sorryy friend but your gfs pussy is already sloppy seconds.
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>>719673521

if you like getting Cucked, go ahead motherfucker.
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>>719677839
this

as soon as those words leave your girlfriends mouth, get tested immediately.
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>>719678037
>>719677966
my dubs.
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>>719675023
Wow man that's not how it will go down. Girls don't fuck just for fucking like guys do they put emotion on it so she will fuck a guy that she double teamed with then go after him and fuck him some more then she will leave you. She sounds like a idiot slut who will want you back after she sleeps around and realizes that guys just want to use her for sex.
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>>719673521

I love threads like this, and all the insecure, possessive faggots that come with them.

Humans were never meant to be monogamous. That shit is a sociological/religious invention left over from the days when wives were property (inb4 hurr durr they still are).

The fact is, there's a difference between monogamy and fidelity. If you're TRULY secure with your partner, and vice versa, you should have no problem having fun sexually with other people. The only reason so many people are against this is because deep down, they feel inadequate, and are afraid that their partner will leave them for someone who fucks better than they do. Again - it's all about security. Some of the strongest couples I know are in open relationships. They get each other on a level that monogamous couples rarely do - they're essentially free of guilt and jealousy. I honestly believe that if most people adopted this attitude, they would be much happier.
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>>719675023
No fuck open relationships Op, don't be a cuck
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>>719677796
>It's random one-time sex only
Ok, fair enough. But keep in mind that in our society, a woman can walk up to a random man and with no introduction, say "do you want to have sex with me?" and there's a good chance he'll say yes. It's that easy for women (google search for "sex with a stranger study".

For men? That shit'll get you arrested, nigga.

Seriously, it's easy for a woman to get a guy in bed, but hard to tie him down in a relationship. It's harder for a guy to get a woman in bed, but easy if he wants a GF-situation
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>>719678443
>>719677639
> Hey, look at me! I'm so free of insecurities I let everyone fuck my gf!
> So alpha, haha!
> haha
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>>719677966

Pretty sure she's not bored of fucking me. We have pretty dirty sex. Couple of days ago we tied each other up and shoved vibrators up each others asses. Before she met me she had never touched a sex toy and had barely had sex in more than 2 different positions. Only two guys have gone down on her before me.
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>>719676532
OR, an open relationship means you love each other on a level that's deeper than monogamy. A level that the physical act of sex with another person can't break.

Your view is myopic.
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>>719678443
Humans weren't meant for "monogamy" in the sense that you'd stay with a partner for 2-3 years to produce offspring, then move on to a new partner. We're even less designed for multiple partners simultaneously than we are for a single lifelong partner
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>>719678443
accquire cool diseases and mentally ill stalkers. have gross swinger sex. the world is your oyster
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>>719678443
I agree with everything but 2 guys one girl is gay and 2 girls one guy is a-ok
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>>719675023
It's going to suck the first time she tell you that she just did it with another guy :\
Maybe I'm just beta af, but that would tear at me.
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>>719678443
>Humans were never meant to be monogamous.
Topkek you have it all figured out huh? Kys you raging faggot. Its not about thinking the girl will leave you, its about not wanting another guys dick pounding inside your girlfriend.
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>>719673521
Fuck no. The only permissible open relationship is when it's strictly polygynous. Any man who lets his girlfriend or wife get fucked by other men is a loser who might as well an hero.
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>>719678443
>humans were never meant to be monogamous
Stopped reading right there. Return to your safespace liberal bullshit. Bet you tell your kids not to bathe because "you don't have to bathe everyday" and "its just a myth perpetuated by the soap companies! the oils are good for you!" too.
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>>719678630
There's that possessiveness I'm talking about. Are you trying to prove me right? Open relationships work both ways - it's not just her fucking other people.

>>719678675
>Humans weren't meant for "monogamy" in the sense that you'd stay with a partner for 2-3 years to produce offspring, then move on to a new partner. We're even less designed for multiple partners simultaneously than we are for a single lifelong partner

Nope. Not if you compare or behavior to most primates - which is what we are. You're simply incorrect.
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>>719678443
Wow must be fun kissing your girl after she sucked a cock off. Or putting your dick in a hole that god knows what diseases your gonna get.
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>>719678618

I'm aware of that, but my GF has really high standards and wouldn't just fuck every guy she meets in a club just because the guys want to fuck her. I also imagine that we wouldn't be fucking other people more than every second month or once a month at most. We have a healthy and fun sex life already and fuck 3-4 times a week.
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>>719678697
>diseases

Yeah, that should never happen provided you practice safe sex. But stay insecure ;)

>>719678854

>Stopped reading right there. Return to your safespace liberal bullshit.

I will, as soon as you return to your bible study, you tremendously outdated faggot. Stay triggered.
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>>719678998
>Wow must be fun kissing your girl after she sucked a cock off.

It's pretty hot, actually.
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>>719673521
Sure do it, but dont tell us we didnt tell you so, she's either already out there or will be out there fucking other guys three deep, but you'll still be looking for the first one
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>>719678633
"Behind every beautiful woman is a mad tired of fucking her." And vice versa.
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>>719678674
OR you're just lying to yourself trying to justify why your partner would want to fuck someone else over you.

Either one.
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>>719678630
>Hey, look at me! I'm so free of insecurities I spend all my time thinking about other men fucking my girlfriend and making contingency plans to stop them!
>So alpha, haha!
>haha
>>
Gigantic red flag and you want to go with it? You deserve it, go right ahead.
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>>719678783

I don't know man. One of my exes cheated on me - just some kissing and some hand action, but still. I got disappointed because that wasn't part of our deal, but it didn't exactly knock me out. I was confident that she wanted to be with me, so I just didn't give that much of a fuck.
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>>719674391
>I'm fairly (+90%) certain that she's not currently cheating on me. Her parent's have had several messy divorces and both her exes have cheated on her big time. She is very much against cheating.
this is male logic.

if your gf a male? no?

she's totally cheating, or will at the earliest opportunity.
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>>719679029
...how long have you been dating her?
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>>719679138
My man!
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>>719679212
lol, you mad that I get to fuck whoever I want and still have a committed partner to go home to? Does it piss you off that much that I've truly found a way to have my cake and eat it too? Me and my girl are 5 years strong and our sex life is great - and I also get to bang a 8/10 19 year old half-Hispanic chick from work - she even joins us sometimes.

You know you're jelly as fuck. But keep telling yourself that the same pussy for the rest of your life is worth it.
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What happens when she starts going ass to mouth when she's getting banged by two or three dudes?would you still kiss her? What if she has a kid with some one else by accident? You gonna raise that kid?
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>>719679363
Oh no somebody has their poor little feelings hurt by one of the mean evil girls that won't fuck their gross ass anymore.
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>>719678674

That's exactly how I feel about it. Read an article about a married couple in an open relationship. The girl said something like "I'd feel he was cheating more on me if he watched Game of Thrones with another girl, because that's OUR thing". I can really relate to that. I'd feel far worse about my girl having a cosy hungover Sunday watching shitty movies and making each other hungover food and spooning than I'd feel if she'd just fucked a random guy or chick after a party.
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>>719679545
Keep telling yourself that fucking around with multiple partners is ultimately a good idea and never turns out badly. ;^)
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>>719675023

why would you want to be in relationship with someone who just happens to be ready to fuck other people and still come back and love you? that kind of shit will cheat on you sooner or later anyway cuz there will always be someone more attractive than you. Just turn into a bitch into fucking fuckbuddy too and fuck other chicks. real relationships are not for you two retards, your bullshit fantasies about future doesnt matter.
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>>719679352
Complications like this happen all the fucking time in polyamorous relationships. Most result in break ups within the first few months due to "rule violations".

My own sister ruined her marriage by agreeing to an open situation just to find out that her husband was fucking his ex gfs without condoms and then coming home and having sex with her unprotected as well.

Her next boyfriend actually dated a woman, against my sisters wishes, and when asked to stop he refused and dumped her for that woman. Who then dumped him for fucking her over that badly. My sister has two toddlers in tow and he kicked her out of his house because she accused him of cheating even though their relationship was "open".

Complications like this happen ALL the fucking time. Its way more trouble than its worth just to feel excited for a few hours.
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>>719679545
so what you are saying is your girlfriend isnt enough for you

you need more than her to feel content

aka you dont love her

but i guess denial is quite a powerful feeling.
>>
>>719679680
Exactly. I'm with you 100%. I recognize sex for what it truly is - a mammalian act of procreation and pleasure. It's not some mystical, sacred thing. It's just fun, and it's only PART of a relationship. It makes no sense for me to deny myself or my girl from having some physical fun with another person, as long as it's safe. Our love, OUR bond, is much, much deeper than that.
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>>719679545
>same pussy for the rest of your life
This is why you're fucking multiple women and acting like that makes you "cool". You're too immature to know how a real long term relationship is supposed to work so you "eat da booty" of every minority female at your workplace and brag about it on 4chan.
t. whiteboi
>>
>>719679251
> I spend all my time thinking about other men fucking my girlfriend

Thats only your assumption about me based on literally nothing. I just stated a fact: in open relationships you let your gf fuck everyone ( or almost everyone).
>>
>>719679363

How the fuck is this "male logic"?

She is traumatised from bad experience with ex BFs. Took me two months before she would let me go down on her because her ex had ruined her confidence. Her fucked up divorced parents have given her anxiety and OCD. She is the most trust-focused person I have ever met because she has truly experienced some shit and some dysfunctional relationships.
>>
Op is a cuck comfirmed
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>>719680012
/thread
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>>719680037
thats the point moron

women do not use logic.

women think logic is sommething men made up to make them feel wrong.
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>>719679545

you're delusional, but it might change when this shit falls apart sooner or later.
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>>719679743
Well, we've been married for 5 years and together for 7 and we love each other more now than ever. So I don't have to tell myself anything. The proof is in my experience. I hope one day you'll find someone you love as much as I love my girl.

>>719679970
Nope, I'm saying this >>719679995. But you can define love however you want to, I guess. Stay mad.
>>
>>719680149
This MRA rally is just getting started.
>>
>>719680012
>>719680130
lol, k.

See >>719680236

But yeah - I know nothing about LTR's.
>>
Sorry op she's cucking you. She'll fuck a dozen more guys guilt free and you'll probably fuck a landwhale once in the next two years.
>>
>>719680229
And you can see
>>719680236
Also.
>>
>>719679995
>its not some mystical sacred thing
>i tell myself over and over again
your bond is only as good as she tells you it is. she'll say anything if it means she gets to continue to fuck other people. just like you do.
whatever you have to tell yourself, kid.
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>>719673521
I decided to bring it up with my gf. She only fucked me and one other guy back in highschool. I've been with a decent amount of women (I'm 28, she's 23). It works really well for us, she can explore how she wants to, I can fuck whoever I like. The only rule is that we don't let those interactions bleed into our normal lives (and always wear protection). It's an excellent situation.
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>>719680014
>No, that dude is totally wrong I'm not insecure at all.
>I'm just defending myself cause I'm so alpha
>so alpha
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>>719680326
this
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>>719680236
>you love as much as I love my girl.

You love her so much you cant keep your dick in your pants for more than few days.

And she loves you so much she has to suck at least 5 different dicks a month.

I wonder - when you kiss her, do you sometimes feel salty taste?
>>
>>719673521
Polygamy more like DeathOfTheWestigamy
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>>719674012
See then there's this faggot that doesn't realize while his gf is off getting laid, he could too. But no, this cunt right here is too focused on some dumb cuck projection bullshit to realize what he could get in the tradeoff. Winners take the deal to get to fuck more women, losers complain that the gf would get to fuck someone else.
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>>719680468
> damage control
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>>719674391
thats the thing she wants a open relashinship because she feels she probly cant take the temptation but wants something to eass the guilt in her head as for weather or not you should do it that I cant say my friend this type of thing is never as simple as a yes or no because well open relashinsips faver the female because she could litraly walk up to any rando dude and ask them to fuck her and 8 ot of 10 times shel get lade(going off the asumtion your GF is atlest mioldly attractiv) but when it comes to guys we tend to have to work harder for sex
>>
>>719680448
Again, see
>>719680236

But by all means, keep telling yourself you know about my relationship better than I do ;)
>>
>>719680311
I dated someone for 4 years, and it was the worst fucking relationship I've ever been in.

Longevity =/= quality. Especially when she's too young to know what a shit partner she actually has. When she DOES catch on, this gilded house of cards you've built up in your mind will collapse overnight and you'll watch her dump you for one of the men you let her fuck on the side.
>probably because he treats her well like a fucking adult
>>
>>719680530
>I wonder - when you kiss her, do you sometimes feel salty taste?

Yes - I already told you it's pretty hot. You should try it.
>>
>>719680236
>we've been married for 5 years and together for 7 and we love each other more now than ever.
Sounds exactly like my friend who decided to open his relationship with his wife because she wanted to fuck other guys. Oh how they "loved" each other until it was obvious he couldn't get anything as easily as she could, then human jealousy took over and they divorced. Now she's fucking every guy that looks her way and he's stuck with a dominant SJW wife with a kid already. This may be anecdotal but god damn man.
>>
Your gf wants to fuck someone else than you, faggot. Period.
>>
>>719680468
Show me where he triggered you anon
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>>719680530
kek, so mad. Let me ask you this:

Why are you so upset that I'm happy and in a relationship that's been going strong for 7 years?
>>
>>719680654
see
>>719680692

>>719680654
see
>>719680692

>>719680654
see
>>719680692


fucking autist.
>>
>>719680773
>implying I'm not an 8/10 myself
In any event, you can answer this too
>>719680812
>>
>>719680875
See
>>719680812
>>
>>719680812
Im not mad anon, right now Im genuinely curious. I wish you well.

But I wonder - what do feel when you kiss her? Do you wonder how many dicks she has sucked earlier?

I'm trying to understand you guys, how do you cope with this.
>>
Why not just have a girlfriend that's faithful and cheat on her? That's what I do.
>>
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>>719680773
>>
>>719680812
>Why are you so upset that I'm happy and in a relationship that's been going strong for 7 years?
>come on random weaboos reassure me my relationship isn't a failure
>g-guys?
goddamn anon
>>
>>719680928
Very well
>>719680812
I'm not. We laugh at you for deluding yourself into thinking open relationships are good. Just because it's fun now doesn't mean it won't come crashing down eventually.
>>
>>719680812
>implying i trust your definition of the words "going strong"
if you have no fucking idea how a long term relationship is supposed to work, how the fuck do you know what it'd look like when it's "going strong"? fucking autist.
>>
>>719680928
I don't give a fuck what you think you are. Your girl wants the dick from another dude. You're not satisfying her needs. If you had fuck you money, you think she'd suggest fucking other guys? If you had a dick that made her begging for more, she'd want to fuck other dudes? Your girls a whore bro.
>>
>>719680812
>implying he's upset
>implying you aren't the triggered one
This thread is shit. Bye
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>>719681005
I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you're not trolling.

When I kiss her I feel the same way I've always felt kissing her - that she's sexy as hell and I'm lucky to have her.

tbh, she hasn't had a fuck buddy in awhile - it's usually me bringing home a girl that we both fool around with. But she's brought home guys too in the past.

How do I feel about it? Fantastic - because I'm not an insecure little bitch.
>>
>>719680812

you're just one step higher than a regular cuck, cuz you're allowed to fuck others too. I bet there are thousands of cuck couple who are super in love and they have healthy awesome relationship and coulnd't be happier, everyone else is just jelly.
>>
Your not gonna fuck any hot chicks...you will end up feeling hurt your girl friend will realize that you have no game and are beta and leave you op lol
>>
>>719681218
See
>>719681288
>>
>>719681299
>I bet there are thousands of cuck couple who are super in love and they have healthy awesome relationship and coulnd't be happier, everyone else is just jelly.

Probably, if that's their thing, yeah.
>>
>>719681288
>not an insecure little bitch
>he says after spending literally hours defending his open relationship to people he'll literally never talk to again
sure thing, kid.
>>
>>719681436
>I wish my wife would fuck other guys
How are they "jelly" of that kind of shit?
>>
>>719681005

Maybe we just don't give that much of a fuck. Maybe we are just confident enough to appreciate that our girls are with us for a reason. Maybe they love us and want to carry our babies. Maybe that's more important than whether the girl entertained herself with sucking a dick. Maybe that act of fellatio served the same entertainment purpose as watching an episode of Friends. Maybe sex just doesn't mean that much to our relationships compared to other factors that are much more important in a long term relationship.
>>
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>>719673521
Lol she just wants to keep you as a consistent fuck toy in case she somehow fails at bringing home a new guy that night. She'll dump you as soon as she finds someone better.

You'd have to be blind to not see she's trying to use you
>>
>>719680583
Winners don't see the need to fuck other women. Losers fuck other women to soothe the numerous insecurities they have.
>>
>>719681557
Why are some people into scat porn?
We'll never know.
>>
>>719681288
Lucky to have her a girl who fucks other dudes? How is that lucky that's like the opposite
>>
She is just going to use this as an excuse to fuck a nigger
>>
>>719681313

>Your not gonna fuck any hot chicks

Why not? Who says I'm as pathetic at picking up chicks as you are.

(PS: You're*)
>>
>>719681462
I wouldn't have brought it up if I wasn't in the mood for an argument - why do you think I worded my original post the way I did?

I'm not defending shit - I came here to pick a fight because I was bored.

I do genuinely think I'm better than all of you, and you're all jealous fucks, though. I bet half of you talking shit aren't even in relationships.

And it hasn't been hours, idiot. I've been at this for like 30 minutes, tops.

Nothing personnell, kid.
>>
>>719681288
But you dont have her.

You ( or guy who thinks like you ) said that need of possessing someone is the sign of being insecure.

The point of open relationships: she doesnt *own* you, you *dont* own her.

She is not *yours*. She belongs to everyone she fucks right now. She didnt give you anything special. What she gives to you, she gives to every other guy she likes.

Thats the main problem - you only provide emotional support and occasional sex, like a total beta guy. When she is happy enough she just fucks other man. And ye, you too.

Did she ever fuck other man during the hard times? Or did she spend more time with you?
>>
>>719681288

That's it. I agree TOO MUCH with you on every level. We have to meet up and have group sex with our GFs and lovers.

No homo.
>>
>>719681809
Because I get to fuck other girls - and bring them home to her. How are you not getting this?
>>
>>719681288
Cool, mind if I take her for a ride? Sounds like I don't have to have any financial investment to get her, even though you seem to.
>>
>>719682009
>needs to fuck other girls in order to feel >>719681875 this fucking superior to everyone around him

no wonder. a strong fart could shatter this mans ego.
>>
>>719673521
With people I know, in every case the person that suggests an open relationship does so because they have someone lined up already that they want to fuck without breaking up with their current girlfriend/boyfriend. You can go for it if you're cool with it but FYI girls can get guys just by laying back and waiting for guys to come to them. She could get fucked every night meanwhile you would need to put in work to get anything. That just builds resentment IMO
>>
>>719681875

You misunderstood everything about the perspective of the so called "ownership" in relationships.

In a traditional relationship, you "own" each other.

In an open relationship, you STILL "own" each other. The only difference is that you don't "own" each others genitals. You have simply isolated sex from the concept of faithfulness.
>>
>>719681875
lol, nice try but you're an idiot. Of course I don't "own" or "possess" her - I have her as a best friend and committed partner. Just like she has me. Just like I have the love of my family - that doesn't mean I "own" or "possess" them, ya fucking dummy!

Sucks how you're not as slick as you think you are, doesn't it?

>>719681964
lol I'd probably be down, mah nigga.
>>
>>719681608
>Maybe we are just confident enough to appreciate that our girls are with us for a reason.

But what reason? You dont give them enough sex, she doesnt feel like she has enough. You are not enough for her, I hope you agree?

She is with you because of money, or emotional support? Does this fact makes you happy? What do you get from that relationship?
>>
>>719679574
abortion, dumbass
>>
>>719682224
Thats not the point of my post. The point is:

What she gives to you, she gives to every other random guy she likes.

There is nothing special she can offer you. To show you she actually cares about you. Even if she does care, she has no way to show this since sex is nothing special for you.

In normal relationships, sex is something more than a mere fact of interacting genitals.
>>
>>719675023
Lol children and their "openness"
>>
>>719675320

In my eyes that's just degenerate as fuck. You might as well just have been fuck buddies then.. Plus guys cheat coz they want to bust a nut, whereas girls look for more emotion-based 'experiences'. If a girl feels the need to fuck other dudes then either she's a fucking slut, or the bf wasn't doing it for her.
>>
>>719681608
Then there is literally no point in having a relationship with anybody let alone the woman you're currently fucking over right now. If sex is meaningless, then it renders all concepts of "commitment" meaningless because all a relationship boils down to is an agreement between two people that they want to fuck each other and no body else.

Otherwise, they'd just stay single and continue to fuck whoever they want but tell their favorites "i like you the most". this is where polyamory logic falls apart.
>>
>>719682263
Your view is so ridiculously warped by tradition it's honestly not even worth arguing with you.

Not him, but my wife makes more than I do - she's certainly not with me for the money. And she's obviously not JUST with me because I'm a good fuck either - because we both allow for each other the chance to explore fucking others.

She's with me because she wants to be with me - and I with her. Because we're partners. Because we're in love - love that's stronger than sex or money. You seem to be conflating these things - you can't grasp the fact that they can be separated. That's why it's pointless having this discussion with you or anyone else who feels this way.

>then hurr durr - why are you having the discussion?

Because I'm bored. Come at me bros.
>>
Almost ruined my eight year relationship. She was fucking other people more than me. And that was "against the rules"

Not worth it imo
>>
>>719682263

Why does sex have to be the dominant factor of whether she "has enough"? What if I'm her soulmate? What if we connect on a deeply emotional or even spiritual level? What if we have the exact same ambitions and goals for our future?

I'm a nice and sympathetic guy. I'm confident, talented at what I do and I'm fairly succesful. I'm a solid 8/10 in terms of looks. I make more money than most. My family and my friends are good people.
I'd say I'm a pretty nice catch.

Me and my GF trust each other. We can talk about everything and nothing and have very similar interests and values. We can be totally calm and secure in each others' company. I even give her a ton of mental stability as I support her shitloads to help her cope with her mental issues. We are the best friends AND attracted to each other physically and mentally AND we can see a future together. What the fuck do we NOT get from our relationship? How the fuck does sex have THAT much power to determine whether our relationship is good and valuable?
>>
>>719682632
This is so false, that it demonstrates your complete lack of understanding of sex.

Do you really think there's no difference between loving sex and casual sex?
>>
>>719673521
She is already fucking someone else, get over it and start fucking someone else too.
>>
>>719682632
>What she gives to you, she gives to every other random guy she likes.
>
There is nothing special she can offer you. To show you she actually cares about you. Even if she does care, she has no way to show this since sex is nothing special for you.

Wow. You are truly out of your goddamned mind. Do you really think the only thing a person can "give" someone else is their body for sex? Do you really believe that that's as deep as a bond between two people can go? Are you really that retarded?

You're spoken like a man who has no clue what a true relationship is. Guaranteed you've never been in one, given the way you talk about it.
>>
Hilarious to see retards use the "human beings weren't meant to be monogamous" logic, failing to see the irony in the development of the concept of monogamy in the first place.

Women evolved to seek out the best potential mate for their offspring, and they choose that mate based on its ability to protect/provide for that offspring. So when they find a good one, they don't want to find another and thus monogamy is born.

It's not some evil Christian ideal that your parents (REEEEEE) shoved on you when you were little. Many species of animals mate for life because of this.
>>
>>719682893
This.

But it's pointless explaining it - these kids won't understand.
>>
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>>719682576
So your going to question the baby to see if it's your or not. What if she still wants to keep it you going to leave her? I thought your love is so strong being a cock old is fine with you why not raising some one Eles kid?
>>
>>719683058
>It's not a true relationship unless she's fucking other men
Sounds to me like you're the retard.
>>
>>719683105
that selection doesn't matter anymore now that we've "evolved" to produce advanced technology.

women can literally select anyone, it doesn't matter. you could end up with a retarded loser child no matter who your mate is and no matter who your mate is, technology can make up for a lot of the old tradition.
>>
>>719682738

So what you're saying is that sex is what "makes" the relationship? That the only difference between a friendship and a relationship is whether you have sex? The only reason you "commit" to your partner is to have ownership over his/her genitals? Nothing else?
>>
Forgive my shitty editing skills
>>
>>719683105
It only really appeared in its current form post-organized religion though, indigenous tribes with no contact with civilization predominantly either raise children in groups of 4 or 5 sexually active partners or in harems
>>
>>719682791
>Your view is so ridiculously warped by tradition

Its not the 'tradition', its the common sense. Dont you understand that there is a reason why nature programmed males to be jealous?

Sex will always be closely connected to *serious* relationships ( not one night stand ), no matter how much you will try to separete it.

However I cannot convince you that I'm right. Until, for example, you will have a child that isnt yours or you get std. Maybe then you will understand.
>>
>>719673521
whatever, fag
>>
>>719683105
The Gibbon ape is actually the only primate (besides humans) that is known to mate for life. Monogamy is actually very rare in nature.

So, if you wanna go by strictly an evolutionary argument, you're completely wrong. Particualrly among primates, females will mate with as many males as possible when they're fertile, and with paternity being in question, will "latch on" to the male they believe will provide best for them. Do some research on Langur monkeys for more information - or Bonobos. They've been studies the most.

And stop talking about shit you clearly are not educated on.
>>
>>719683477

>Dont you understand that there is a reason why nature programmed insecure people to be jealous?

FTFY.
>>
>>719683300
>the only different between a friendship and a relationship is whether you have sex
Yes. Exactly. I've had friends for literally decades, sharing more with them than I do my partner in many ways, and I still don't consider myself "in a relationship" with those people because I'm not FUCKING those people.

The only reason you call them your "partner" in the first place is because of a tacit agreement between the two of you to fuck each other and no one else. That is the definition of a "romantic relationship". Someone you like a lot, that you fuck exclusively. There is no point to declaring love to one person if you're going to fuck everyone and feed her pretty lies about how specialer she is than the others. You're wasting her fucking time. There are other men out there who'd value everything she has to offer above the rest, like you refuse to.
>>
>>719683582
Insecure people need attention from lots of people. You know, like retards who want open relationships.
>>
>>719683394
>indigenous tribes
This matters when you live in an indigenous tribe and literally no where else.
>>
>>719683685

You sound like quite the little sociopath.
>>
>>719682893
> What if we have the exact same ambitions and goals for our future?

I understand, but I'm stating a simple fact - you dont satisfy her sexual desires. True or not?

>How the fuck does sex have THAT much power to determine whether our relationship is good and valuable?

Maybe because sex is pretty important part of the relationship?

When couple moves to open relationships, it usually means its over. If its not the point in your case it means you are in minority.
>>
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I remember my friend and his girlfriend did this. They both found out later that they got H.I.V they also have a kid. It later turned out to not be there's. Be careful dude not dogin on your life choices just make sure about the people you both sleep with.
>>
>>719683477
If I ever get an std I can get it treated. It's not a big deal - and my wife and I have never had one because we practice safe sex above all.

And she's on the pill. If we ever decide to have kids it will be between us. We discuss our extramarital relationships with each other - and often involve the people in our lovemaking (but not always). You seem to have it in your head that we're hoking up randomly with strangers in bars every night. You can't be further from the truth, honestly.

But please - tell me how "one day I'll understand," oh wise one who's never been in an LTR before...
>>
>>719683812
Nice deflection, faggot.
>>
>>719683747

I don't disagree with your statement that insecure people need attention from lots of people. But you gotta admit that jealousy stems from feeling inadequate to someone else - being threatened by someone who is somehow in a position to rob you of something due to their superiority. That fear - jealousy in its purest form - is based on insecurity. If you can't see that, then you fail to understand basic psychology.
>>
>>719683747
lol yeah - because that one thing = the other. You sure showed us!
>>
>>719673521
i would recommend against it. it makes complications in the relationship and doesn't always feel fair which leads to jealousy then break ups.
if you're bi and she wants to bring a guy or she is bi and wants to bring a girl into sex thats great and i support that but open relationships can get messy
>>
>>719673521
CUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK
>>
>>719673521
Break up with her before its too late
dont be a dumbass
>>
>>719683582
Yep, just look at all those insecure lions and like 95% of the mammals! Those insecure betas!

But whatever, if you want you can argue with nature.
>>
>>719683912

Part true, part false. I satisfy the part of her sexual desires that can be satisfied by a single partner. Her sexual desires also contain fantasies of multiple partners. As I am only one person, I'm unable to satisfy those specific desires.

But it's not like she has a desire for some specific sexual act that I cannot fulfil, but some other guy can fulfil it. I am a good lay and I'm open to everything. If her desires can physically be satisfied by a single guy, then I can do it - but obviously, if her desires contain multiple partners or female partners, then no, I can't satisfy them.
>>
>>719673521
Do you think you'll be able to fuck more women then she can fuck men?
Or do you both just more three-ways
>>
>>719684313
>male lions murder lion cubs because of insecurity
whew lad, not even that anon but this is some grade A shitposting. they kill other males cubs to stop that males genetics from advancing, which advances their own. like all males in nature are programmed to do. pass on their genetics.
>>
>>719684259
No, let him fuck everything up. It's the only way he'll learn the meta of human relationships.
>>
>>719684313

Lions and 95% of mammals (probably a lot more, actually) are all polyamorous. So your logic is failed.

Also, you are implying that animals can't feel insecure, which is not true.
>>
>gf had been hounding me weeks for an open relationship
>finally agree
>next night she tells me she'll need the room
>her boss comes over and looks at me
>smirks and heads into my room
>had to listen to him grunt while she moaned the whole time
>he spent the night before kissing her goodbye
>feel like killing myself
>>
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>>719684648
>>
>>719684079
>and often involve the people in our lovemaking
>lovemaking

Oh please, dont make it sound bizarre.

But ye, my bad I dont know how it is to be in OR.

However this discussion proved to me that you cant convince someone to change his perception of "love". I see that arguing doesnt really makes sense right now.
>>
http://www.petful.com/behaviors/a-list-of-animals-that-mate-for-life/

this thread is cancer.
>>
>>719684648
We didnt talk about animals being polyamorous. We talked about jealousy.

I didnt imply this. Like some anon said - jealusy and insecurity makes lions kill not their cubs. And every male which threatens their position in herd.
>>
>>719685010
>liberal university professor wants to shatter the monogamy myth!
God these people need shot. Humans and their intellect make monogamy the most successful way to have relationships. I don't give a fuck about insecurities, jealousy is powerful and destructive as fuck when humans have it. Just because people want to fuck around all the time doesn't mean it's a good idea to let it happen. Shit goes wrong every time, sooner or later.
>>
>>719684671
should tell her no and if she cant handle her sexual urges then she needs to fuck off back to whore island
>>
>>719685489
jesus christ what a dated reference.
>>
>>719684474
>I'm unable to satisfy those specific desires.
Thank you.
>>
>>719676949
Are you retarded?
>>
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>>719673521

Do it.
Then when it all goes wrong tell /b/ about how /b/ helped you get to the horrible point in your life where you want to kill yourself.

Good luck OP.
>>
>>719685856

But it would be impossible to satisfy those specific desires in any traditional relationship. Does that mean that she should be confined to being single all her life? Or should you be constructive about it and try and tailor a relationship model to work for the needs in question?
>>
>>719686803
You're not supposed to try and satisfy a woman's desire to fuck other men instead of you. If she wants that, leave her and find someone who actually loves you and has morals. Let the whore be a whore if she's so obsessed with the idea of "experiencing" more in life. Don't let her bring you down when it comes crashing down for her, because it will.
>>
>>719686803
No. Its just a thing you have to deal with I guess.
If you dont care about it then its fine I guess. Its strange thou, since for many men, having a 'rich' history is a massive red flag.
And if you care about it, lets hope she does for you as much as you do for her.
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