>ITT: People who couldnt get a gf so natural selection forced

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I would like to dedicate the dubs of this thread to a grand eight years of Trump.
May he repeal the gay marriage law and put negros back to the cotton fields.

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>tfw no gf

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>>718804637
Dont you have a harem?

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>>718804716
It's only a harem if you count my imaginary waifus

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tfw not in a harem

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>>718804808
waifus you probably stolen from virgin weebs. Cant leave well enough alone, can you? Gotta take every bit of everything.

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>>718804877
Harems have standards.

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>5 dubs in 12 posts
I'm letting the team down

>>718805029
Nah, I'm like a terrible hipster. My waifus were all obscure before the virgin weebs found them. If anything, the weebs are trying to steal them from me.

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Spoiler alert: I don't even want a gf.

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>>718805105
You claim to have standards. Where's your harem?

>>718805135
keep those numbers up boy

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>>718805173

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>>718805225
I'll be here all night.

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tfw no borderline psychotic rabbit bf

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>>718805135
You're just trying to justify stealing waifus from virgin weebs.

>>718805182
Im too gross, too autistic, too poor.

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>>718805323
RIP.

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Oh, and Baam got another power up. He hadn't already outclassed all his friends enough

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>>718805173

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>>718805392
I had them first. The weebs can go argue over Asuka and Rei like the plebeians they are

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>>718805392
You're cute and rich in spirit.

But yeah autism is a thing.

>>718805402
BE MY BORDERLINE PSYCHOTIC RABBIT BF

>>718805405
that chapter was "hey let me remind you this is still basically shonen trash"

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>tfw almost had gf but natural selection forced me to be disgusting homogay.

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>>718805449
Best damn clod you ever did see.

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>>718805540
What do I get in exchange?

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>>718805650
a...narcissistic non-rabbit bf

it works just run with it

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>>718805540
You clearly need to read patrician mangas like me.

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My dad found a dildo in a box in my apartment. My worst fear has been realized.

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>>718805753
kill him to hide your secret

>>718805739
oh, obviously

I did read several of your recommendations

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>>718805704
Ahh, but how can I trust you?

>>718805753
Stop leaving your dildos out, man.

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>>718805851
Trust me in what way, to be reliably narcissistic? I think 5 years of posting is probably a good endorsement.

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>>718805900
I was going to go with 'to not murder me in my sleep'.

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>>718805809
Kill me to hide my secret.

>>718805851
It was in an old watercooler box, he thought it was computer parts and he was like "What the hell is this?".

I didn't tell him the truth for obvious reasons (Said my weird friends sent it to me as a joke) but strangely he seemed okay with the situation, he was just weirded out. He knows.

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>>718805809
Oh, did you ever end up reading Golden Kamui?

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>>718806039
I love dick too much. The only thing I will do to you in your sleep is play with yours. Ask katia.

>>718806047
I can do that too.

>>718806102
No I didn't start that one but it's the one you mention the most often. Link me to page 1.

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>>718806047
Welp. Sounds like it could have gone worse.

>>718806158
Fair enough, then. Will you be paying for my flight to the US?
I'm unemployed for the next 2 weeks, you know.

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>>718806260
Absolutely not. I'll find a more conveniently located psychotic rabbit. Or you can swim.

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>>718806158
http://bato.to/reader#b2c16891c5b01c90

I mention it most to you because a spaghetti western cooking hunting action adventure horror comedy history manga seems more up your alley than a romantic comedy.

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>>718805476
They probably dont even have a harem.

>>718805540
Hows that supposed to buy me a harem?

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>>718806344
I mean, it MIGHT be. I don't like things to be too goofy. And I only like romcoms in movie form, lubricated by wine.

>>718806372
I dunno, I'm a harem slut not a sultan.

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>>718806158
I'm deeply considering throwing it all away now, but part of me is like "It's already exposed, why stop now?"

I'm definitely throwing away the small box, it had a prostate massager, floppy ovipositor dildo thing, and cock rings. My dad thought it was just a regular dildo. Thank god he didn't know what it really was.

>>718806260
He could have found the box under my bed with 1k worth of dragon cocks in it. I feel like my reputation is soiled now.

He's not treating me different but he's messing with me about it (We saw a delorean last night and I said I wanted one and he said "Not if you keep buying floppy dildos you wont.")

Dear god what have I done. He probably thinks I'm some freak, I don't want to be lumped in with the rest of the weirdo's. This is exactly why I keep private about my entire personal life.

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>>718806335
Nah, I'll find someone more local, thanks.

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oh I have to register on this site
ughhhhhh

>>718806437
yeah I mean you've already gone this far

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>>718806408
It knows when to be serious and when to be goofy.

Oh there's also Goblin Slayer, which is about a guy called Goblin Slayer who slays goblins and his goblin slaying adventures but that one's relatively new and is only monthly so you'd run out of content fast.

I mentioned it in my skype chat. Violent with lots of rape, I said. A friend read it later and then complained cause there was a bunch of rape and violence.

I asked him what the fuck he was expecting, since I said it was full of rape. He said he was hoping for something more lighthearted

The rest of the chat has been tormenting him with comments about lighthearted rape for weeks now

>>718806372
If they do, it's a harem of SHIT waifus.

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>>718806494
Well just find another site if you can't be fucked.

mangahere.co or something

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>>718806623
Is rape ever anything other than lighthearted?

>>718806650
nah I'm just gonna WHINE

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Fucking weebo fags, go be gay somewhere else.

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>>718806668
Goblin rape is notorious for not being light-hearted

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>>718806790
but goblins are so little

>>718806779
it's actually a furry thread but I could see why you'd be confused

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>>718806837
They don't wash and they appear in numbers, and sometimes they forget they're supposed to penetrate with their cocks and not with their feces-encrusted knives.

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>>718805753
What was your dad doing going through boxes in your apartment?
You'll be fine. My dad found my butt stuff and my drugs at the same time. It wasn't one dildo, but half a dozen. One of them was an 18 inch long, 2 inch diameter double dildo that I accidentally bought on amazon because I thought it was smaller. I had never shoved it up my butt, but he didn't know that.

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>>718806923
this is why we need wizards to develop goblin genocide spells

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>>718806408
>Yukky icky harem slut
2/10
Would not have in harem

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>>718806965
Goblin Slayer is way ahead of you.

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>>718807105
I AM IN HIGH DEMAND IN HAREMS FUCK YOU

>>718807146
maybe I will read this

goblin genocide is just

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>>718807176
I'll remind you a bit in the future. It's like, in the middle of a boss battle and since it updates monthly that would be a pain in the ass to catch up on

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>>718806623
sf would be in those harems.

>>718807150
High demand in shitty waifu harems.

Also no fuck, I am too old for that.

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>>718807312
thanks friend

>>718804077
This happened to me before I met my wife. I was so lonely that I basically went prison gay. There was gay guys available that found me attractive so I brutally fucked them with no emotions on occasion making one of them cry in the act of the anal assault but he liked it and kept coming back. When I met my wife she knew about it and sees no problem with it, she even fantasized on occasion about be power fucking a small framed feminine dude. We've been married 5 years now and recently started letting me plow her ass for old times sake.

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>>718807456
Kinda gross tbh

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>>718806953
It was just sitting in the middle of my room and he thought it was something else.

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>>718805542
instahard

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who care

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>>718807996
You have no one to blame but yourself.

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>>718808052

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>>718808090
I know but that doesn't mean I don't regret leaving that stuff out.

A part of me is also kind of at ease because he found it, I don't have to really hide anymore. I just don't want people treating me like a freak.

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>>718807996
who cares, stop respecting ppl

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>>718808193
who care

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>>718808279

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>>718808196
People already treat me like a freak so I just sit home all day and give people the same respect they give me in turn.

bye, on stim

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>>718808323
who care

>>718808312
thank

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>>718808313
I wouldn't treat you like a freak

>>718808400
Yeah but you're a freak

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>>718808312

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>>718808400
Well at that point thats just where you would be lying to me and I hate liars. So sneaky, so ploty.

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>>718808475
This too

>>718808624
I respect people who keep their kinks inside the bedroom and don't act out like retards. When the doors closed and the lights go out I'm all game for whatever your into, but otherwise I respect civilized humans not freaks of nature wearing dildo capes.

I'm the most laid back guy you'll ever meet, I can't hold a grudge and I rarely get upset. I'll mesh with anyone as long as I can respect you.

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>nobody treats me nice I hate everyone just leave me alone
>multiple people treat him nice
>YOU'RE LYING YOU'RE A FREAK GO AWAY REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

nibi darling, stop that

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>>718808791
People always lie about their person, which is why judge of character is almost always best from a third party.

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>>718809075
I have no reason to lie. I just wanna cuddle and lame shit like that.

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>>718808891
I will feed the shit one person tried to give me to the next. My resentment just works like that. Maybe people should of gave me what I wanted when the time was right, but I guess thats where their hindsight kicks in.

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>GIVE ME WHAT I WANT YOU CUNNY
>okay here you go
>FUCK YOU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
>please stop yelling at me
>YOU DIDN'T GIVE ME WHAT I WANTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

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>>718809161
>Lie to get cuddles

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>>718809474
>GIVE ME WHAT I WANT YOU CUNNY
>okay here you go
Sex at 19, give.

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>>718809721
you're not that shallow, despite how much you pretend to be

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>>718809664
Why would I lie to get cuddles? I just want cuddles. Who the fuck lies to get cuddles?

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>>718808791
>I'm game for whatever you're into
What if they're into sexual necrophagia? Or what if they're zoophiliacs? Or what if they like taking actual frothy liquid shits on people? Saying you're into whatever someone else is into can be a super dangerous thing.

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>>718809970
Well of course there's limits to what I'D be into, but what I meant was like I'll respect whatever someone is into. Doesn't mean I'll do it, just means I'm okay with them being into it.

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>>718809876
>Here is what I want
>Thats not what you want (insult)
Irony the post.

>>718809900
Jews lie to get money. I would suspect a swede to lie to get cuddles.

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>>718810124
What if they're into pederasty? Even that is a dangerous thing to say, that you are fine with whatever people are into.

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>>718810197
But everyone likes cuddles. It's a win-win.

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>>718810282
Russians do not like cuddles, they like vodka.

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>russians do not like cuddles

Well that would explain a lot, you are half russian after all.

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>>718810280
What if they're into getting rocket ship fuel pumped into their ass?

It's all hypothetical scenarios, but being realistic if they were into something stupid like that of course I'd dump them or tell them to knock it off.

Anything that would endanger me or my health clearly isn't going to work out.

>>718810388
With enough Vodka you will want cuddles, but you must have one to have the other.

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>>718810588
I'm just saying, making a sweeping statement that you're fine with anything is an incredibly dangerous proposition.

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>>718810726
I am okay with anything as long as
>I respect people who keep their kinks inside the bedroom and don't act out like retards
>I'll mesh with anyone as long as I can respect you

If I can't respect someone, and they can't keep their shit in line then it won't work out. There's standards that I have that must be met. Cleanliness for one.

i'm fine with everythig

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>>718810588
With enough vodka I usually just want to listen to music or shoot things.

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>>718810878
So things like necrophagia and pederasty are fine as long as they're kept in the bedroom? Deviant and disgusting behavior is fine as long as it's kept private?

>>718811006
I'll shoot right in your butt fam

wouldnt necrophilia be excluded under cleanliness clauses

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Necrophagia is different from necrophilia.

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>>718811085
Maybe you'd get cuddles from someone if you werent an obnoxious idiot?

i guess since this brief clash of semantics is centric to your assertion, it's not applicable for me to give you the reasons i said what i said instead of saying what you said, and either way, the question remains fundamentally unchanged.

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Necrophilia I would imagine isn't inherently unclean. A body doesn't develop the bacteria that causes it to rot until some days after. A body in a morgue or mortuary is also relatively clean. It really isn't until the body starts to show outwards signs of decay that you have to worry about cleanliness.

>>718812603
lolwat
no

i would imagine one's gut flora would go pretty nuts close to immediately after the immune system shuts down. i don't know how much of an impact the competition between the different bacteria would have, though.

furrys are ugly without the suit
furrys are ugly with it
either way their fucked

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It does eventually increase greatly, but not immediately or noticeably for a while. You'd be surprised at how little a difference between a living person and a person who died a couple of days prior have.

>>718812712
For several days after a person dies they remain relatively no different from a person that is living as far as the bacteria that are contained in the body. Furthermore, keeping the body in cold storage would greatly slow the decaying process. You could die, have a funeral a week later without being embalmed, and pose no threat to anybody that attended your funeral even if they were to rub your dead body all over them.

>>718813091
it literally takes MINUTES for the bacteria in your body to start decomposing the internal organs

you want to call that clean, suit yourself

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>>718811600
Lets be honest, you're a bit more obnoxious.

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>>718813294
A person shows no signs of decay for days after their death.

>>718814037
and?
that has got nothing to do with what I wrote

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>>718814330
And if the internal organs were really rotting within minutes of death then within minutes of death it would be noticeable.

>>718814495
Look it up then, or ask any doctor/mortician

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>>718816682
I have a fetish for tribal pics like that , could you post more if you have them? Thanks