If you could go back in time and be something from that time

King in middle ages, buying girls from peasants and shit.

>>718602072
I'd be a Samurai in the Shimazu clan and server the mighty Shimazu Yoshihiro.

>>718602072
Probably early Hungarians when they were entering Europe.

Or Vikings

>>718602072
God emperor before Ramses to purge the jews.

>>718602072
I'd go back to the 40s to see if Hitler was actually ordering that many Jews to be killed.

>>718602168
>Me benis

I'm black so I can't go back to far lol

>>718602072
member of the bee gees

>>718602363
You can go back to colonial times and fend the colonials off from Ethiopia

>>718602363
Yeah yeah, I saw that Louis CK bit too you unoriginal faggot.

osmanian empire, sultan or some shit

Civil War soldier and found the Green Berets then go to battlefield and take up prone firing position in trees and stuff and kill the Union Soldiers and have the CSA take over America and then become a cultural icon that forms his own country that succeeds Florida from the rest of the Confederacy and Start the Nazi party so that I can become the Furher and encourage everybody to join my cause of having a dictatorship long before Hitler's time.

France in the 1930's.

Slaver during The First Crusade. I'd be buying up every single muslim bitch between the ages of 5 and 12, and keep them in my personal harem, while selling off their families to wealthy European landholders to work to death.

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>>718602900
I would go back to Civil War and do the special forces shit too but I would also phophesize that in the 21st century, a man by the name of Andy Sixx will rise to power in America and that his log of shit has godlike powers and whoever sucks it out of his ass will have achived nirvana.

But i like your nazi stuff, perhaps we can form an alliance.

Well call it the Shitlog-Nazi Union

>>718602072
I'd like to go back to the middle ages and become a brothel
> have people fucking inside of me nonstop
> breathe the nasty sex air and plaids (plague & aids)
don't know about you cunts but this is a dream come true for any guy

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>>718603404
>become an actual brothel
>people have sex inside me
>breath in the fumes
>a dream come true for any guys

>>718603109
You've had fantasies about this before, haven't you?

>>718602072
>back in time
>that time period

Not very specific here, man. I mean if you leave it that wide open, I'd go all the way back to yesterday and just be some rich American faggot because I like my modern technology. But if it has to be centuries old, I always thought it would have been awesome to be an explorer. Except I don't know how much of the fun that would retain when I already know what's out there.

>>718602303
then I guess you'd just live through WWII..?

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I'd be whatever the big bang was before it 'banged' so i could watch myself explode over the entire universe

>>718602072
You should lay out some more rules.
I assume we keep our memories when we go back, but we also would need new ones to even function in different time periods. You wouldn't be a good viking if you didn't even speak their language.

Also, I assume you can't come back through time travel, which means it's gonna suck ass for you anyway. I mean, being a viking is great until you're even a little bit past your prime. Then it's just shitty in every conceivable way and you'll probably die from an infection from stubbing your toe.

>>718604420
why are hitlers eyes so uguu

>>718602072
Vikings for sure. If I could take anything, I'd probably take some cannabis seeds and my tools. I'm an apprentice gunsmith.

>>718604695
if you look closely you can see he is browsing 4chan when that picca was taken

revert to living as a peaceful christian much earlier,,forced to defend hearth village and the wifey against warlock
vikings

Id go back in time to when my gf was still alive and hold her toghter than I ever did.

Man was I a shitbag

>>718603833
>>718604502

>Being this autistic about a rhetorical question

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This is a fun mind game. So then, let’s suppose that you were able every night to dream any dream you wanted to dream, and that you could for example have the power within one night to dream 75 years of time, or any length of time you wanted to have.

And you would, naturally, as you began on this adventure of dreams, fulfil all your wishes. You would have every kind of pleasure during your sleep. And after several nights of 75 years of total pleasure each you would say: “Well that was pretty great”. But now let’s have a surprise, let’s have a dream which isn’t under control, where something is gonna happen to me that I don’t know what it's gonna be.

And you would dig that and would come out of that and you would say: “Wow that was a close shave, wasn’t it?”. Then you would get more and more adventurous and you would make further-and-further-out gambles what you would dream. And finally, you would dream where you are now. You would dream the dream of living the life that you are actually living today.

That would be within the infinite multiplicity of choices you would have. Of playing that you weren't god, because the whole nature of the godhead, according to this idea, is to play that he is not. So in this idea then, everybody is fundamentally the ultimate reality, not god in a politically kingly sense, but god in the sense of being the self, the deep-down basic whatever there is. And you are all that, only you are pretending you are not.

>>718602072
why are people's faces so dirty in pseudo-old-timey cosplays and movies and shit

Unless they were in a desert, they had water back then, they were allowed to wash their faces.

>>718602072

I want to be a dinosaur

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>>718604420

"It's like you took a bottle of ink and you threw it at a wall. Smash! And all that ink spread. And in the middle, it's dense, isn't it? And as it gets out on the edge, the little droplets get finer and finer and make more complicated patterns, see? So in the same way, there was a big bang at the beginning of things and it spread. And you and I, as complicated human beings, are way, way out on the fringe of that bang. We are the complicated little patterns on the end of it. Very interesting. But so we define ourselves as being only that. If you think that you are only inside your skin, you define yourself as one very complicated little curlique, way out on the edge of that explosion. Way out in space, and way out in time. Billions of years ago, you were a big bang, but now you're a complicated human being. And then we cut ourselves off, and don't feel that we're still the big bang. But you are. Depends how you define yourself. You are actually--if this is the way things started, if there was a big bang in the beginning-- you're not something that's a result of the big bang. You're not something that is a sort of puppet on the end of the process. You are still the process. You are the big bang, the original force of the universe, coming on as whoever you are. When I meet you, I see not just what you define yourself as--Mr so-and- so, Ms so-and-so, Mrs so-and-so--I see every one of you as the primordial energy of the universe coming on at me in this particular way. I know I'm that, too. But we've learned to define ourselves as separate from it."

>>718604732

>vikings
>guns

Fuck is the point of that?

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90's Norway anyday

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>>718604958
You just had to overcomplicate it, didnt you, faggot?

>>718604502
That's the thing about a lot of the past.
Occasional cool looking stuff but most of it is dying from disease or war or just fucking nature ripping your head off all before your 30th birthday.

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>>718603404
wonderful

>>718603766
Yes, I have. This and a lot of others. My job is very mind numbing, and if I don't let it wander, I'd go fucking insane.

>>718605003

yeah and why don't they get their nails done too.

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>>718605210
ITT faggots who don't even know basic Eastern philosophy

>>718602072

>be me
>2012
>invest fuck ton in bitcoin

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>>718605540
>he falls for the bitcoin meme

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>>718604931
It's fucking important to how the question is answered. And the question's not rhetorical, you double nigger, OP is inviting responses.

If the question is seriously which previous time period we would like to live in, the only correct answer is "this time period". Every other time period sucked ass compared to this one.

There was fun and sex and stuff for time immemorial, but if you legitimately want to be a viking--who pillages food from neighboring countries because his own windblasted homeland gets no fuckin sunlight and can barely be farmed--you're suicidal. You'll die at age 27 from scurvy after your teeth fall out and they'll burn your corpse on a pyre because the soil is too frozen and shitty to dig a proper grave.

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>>718604958

>>718602072
Yep Viking, when men were real men, not the soft arsed, safe space needing limp wristed puny little pathetic beta fucktards they're becoming these days.

>>718605510

There's a reason for that. It doesn't go well with consumerism. Coincidentally, the only way it gets into the Western sphere of thought is by, well, commercialising itself. And it's not overly successful at that for obvious reasons, again.

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>>718604931
Where's the fun in hypothetical questions like this if no thought goes into the answers?

>>718605092
i love you

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>>718605613

Explain.

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>>718605318
There's no reason to have shit on your face unless it's war paint.

When you sweat it'll get literal shit in your eyes. You can think that's as alpha and manly as you want, you're still gonna get pinkeye.

>>718605698
Shut the frak up, Gaius Baltar.
>BSG is the best sci-fi show ever to air.

>>718603833
>I already know what's out there.

Without relying on a search engine tell me what's out there and where it is as specific as possible.

Do you guys want to be US soldiers in Iraq? Because I'm sure some dumbass kids in 2100 will think being a US soldier back then was cool they would want to be that.

>>718602072
Ronald Reagan

2 ad roman emperor ,pretorian guard or some shit

To the beginnings of the agricultural revolution.

To be left alone.

>>718606395
By everything except for pack predators.

>>718602072
I'd go back to 1660's and be a pirate.Rum and gold son.

>>718606164
Well, shit, good point tbh. I'm pretty sharp at geography but it would be very different in person and with old tech.

You basement dwellers would instantly die of polio if you stepped foot before 1950.
I'd go back to 1980 and start and completely own the internet. I'd be a trillionaire by 1982 with my knowledge of what these dumb sheep get addicted to.

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>I'd be doing cool shit
No you wouldn't; you'd be the same boring cunt that you already are. You could be doing interesting shit with your life right now if you wanted, but let's be honest, you probably aren't. It'd be the exact same case no matter which period of human existence you lived during.

>>718606171
who the fuck would want to be a US soldier.. hurrr

>>718602072

That show isn't accurate at all. Like, at all. Might as well be watching Game of Thrones as a fucking documentary.

>>718607165
Project harder, faggot.

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>>718606171

>implying the simulation doesn't reset in the year 2099

>>718607157
back to sleep child, school tomorrow

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>>718607292
Yeah you're right. You're definitely an interesting person that does interesting things with their life.

>>718602072
Medieval noble. Have some serfs working under me. nothing fancy

>>718607157
>>718607157


1982? I don't think you understand how technology and manufacturing works.

>>718605889
>>718605698

>>>>>/qst/

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>>718607157

>basement dwellers
>own the internet
>dumb sheep
>trying this hard

>>718602072
Why? It would probably be boring as shit.
I very much like the comfy technology our predecessors have built for us.

There's absolutely nothing good about the old times.
Food sucked, healthcare sucked, everything sucked.

I'd be on that flight on 9/11, kill the hijackers, and crash the plane into the building myself

>>718602072
Do I get to choose my body too? Cos yeah, osgood schlatter's disease, glass teeth and shitty eyesight don't make for a real fun time in any era...

I could be a caveman, I guess. Someone's gotta distract the saber tooth long enough for the others to get away.

>>718607744
And your mom suck dicks now

>>718602072
I would go back to the time just before i posted this comment and tell myself not to post it.

>>718607899
Cosmic.

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>>718607899

>>718607777
A true answer of kek

>>718607661
fuck is this

I would go back to when your mother was single and then have you conceived.

>>718602072
jack the ripper

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>>718608051
thanks dad

>>718604931
You don't know what a rhetorical question is do you?

>>718606055
In Viking culture having a dirty face was not frowned upon as it is nowadays. Back then people had more important things to worry about than judging someone on how clean their face was.

I'd go back to Saturday, April 18th 1987, and be as I am right this second, with all of the knowledge I have right now, and beat my mother to death just before she tried to beat 8yr old ME to death. A WORLD of shit that followed that incident, would not happen, and I might actually be a decent, well adjusted, human being, instead of the barely held together basket case I am right now.

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>>718608478
You're making an assumption, though.

I'd argue that the general rule "If shit sticks to you, wipe it off" applies not only to our modern culture, but most likely to all cultures, and to all historical cultures as well, going back to the beginning of anatomically modern humans and extending back to the first creatures that dragged themselves onto dry land hundreds of millions of years ago.

Animals groom themselves with teeth and paws. We have goddamn hands.

>>718608478
>>718608478

Uhh, that's not true at all. You might want to look up Viking culture in reality before talking nonsense.

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>happy
>before this place existed

>>718608843
Plenty of times I have been doing manual labour and I've had dirt in my eyes and shit on my face. Not gonna go and give myself a face mask every 15 mins.. Suspect they gave even less of a fuck back then.

>>718608986
Ok then.. explain how I'm wrong ?

>>718608711
Uhhh... Shit. This kind of kills the petty bullshit I was thinking about adding to the thread.

>>718602072
1870-90
Some of the best sciance was done then, and I could use my future knowlage to help a bit. That'd be fun. Telsa ray guns and phonographs ahhhh yeah!

>>718602072
Crusader with Lionheart, ss in Stalingrad or "viking" in Finland.

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>>718608711
And then you'd just live in 1987.
Grats, you completely abandoned everything in your life to go back in time to fix the life of an alternate version of you.

>>718609282
>>718609282

They weren't savage dirt people FFS. They remained clean, they wore bright colors, they didn't walk around in leather biker gear.

If everything you know about Vikings comes from a shitty TV show then you need to open a book.

Also, Vikings were renowned traders and merchants.

>>718608478
>>718608843

Vikings -- and what is popularly conceived of as "medieval people" in general -- had the same basic standards of cleanliness as we do nowadays. They took regular baths, they washed their hair, and they cleaned their teeth/nails. Particular methods of hygiene upkeep varied by region and time period, but the aversion to dirtiness is relatively constant.

source: I have a Ph.D. in medieval studies.

>>718609579
>>718609579

Well not the same as today. If that were the case there wouldn't have been such rampant disease. Also they weren't nearly as clean as many other civilizations, like the Japanese who DID take daily baths.

They weren't smeared with mud though, either.

>>718609579
oh cmon. u do not have a phd.

A time where chivalrous knighthood was practiced would be ideal for me.

I would go against common sense in order to uphold chivalrous code.

I would probably die immediately.

>>718602072
OP show us your body, I bet you are a skinny/overweight coward who wouldn't fight anyone. Viking my ass, bitch.
I would go back to the USA in the 50's get a good job, buy a big house and raise a big family.

>>718609483
Still worth it. Not to mention all the cocaine floating around back then. I'd get a job at a local garage, and spend my off time blowing lines, and fucking sluts with big hair. Maybe look up my father a couple decades early, and get him in touch with 8yr old me. Who knows, maybe life would be better for me back then too.

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>>718609561
I didn't say they were dirty people. I said they wouldn't get flustered (like you would) over a bit of dirt on their face..

>>718609798
In other words, you'd STILL be tipping your fedora. Jesus dude. Your life must be REALLY fucked up.

>>718609935
>>718609935

They would if it remained there. You're acting like they didn't care if they were dirty. They did. If someone walked around caked with dirt all day they'd tell them to go fucking wash.

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>>718609579
Thanks anon.
I have no evidence you actually have a Ph.D but still.

People don't walk around with shit on their face. Maybe if they just finished some dirty manual labor, and for maybe a few hours afterwards, but at some point soon they're gonna wash the shit off.

>>718609935
Anon, look at OP's pic. That's not a bit of dirt, that's a layer of dirt.
Back then, the only reason to be so dirty is if you're a smith, some sort of miner, or more drunk than the average man (who was probably pretty drunk).

And I hope your pic isn't meant to evoke viking manliness because no viking had such laughably pointless man-tits.

>>718609579
>>718608843
You fucking retards fail to realise that i never suggested the vikings were dirty, i merely suggested that a smigin of dirt on ones cheek would not bother them as much as it clearly bothers you cunts.. pfft..

>>718609751

Very true, but the basic standards were there -- aka, "I have dirt on my face, I should go wipe it off at some point" rather than "I have dirt on my face, but I am so busy raping and pillaging that I cannot wipe it off ever." As you (I think it was you) pointed out, medievalist media likes making the latter option look like historical fact which people then parrot to each other.

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A T L A N T I A N

>>718610269
>>718610258
Right faggots, time for bed.. arguing over the amount of makeup a viking actor wears.. lel..

>>718610679
>>718610679

That show is so shitty make up isn't even a problem. Their armor, their tactics, their weapons, their locations, their mythos, damn near everything from that show is fucking bullshit.

>>718610568
you can't choose a location from a book

>>718610923
don't watch it then.. holy shit, not difficult..

>>718611192
I stopped watching 3 episodes into season 3. Just lost interest.

>>718602072
1603, Japan, student of Miyamoto Musashi.

>>718602228
RIP
Why would you choose the losing side in the middle of the sengokujidai?

>>718611368
good for you

>>718611192
>>718611192

I don't. Then again I do have to deal with massive amounts of morons like you who get their history lessons through shitty TV shows and movies. I bet you think William Wallace and his armies wore hilts into battle and liked wearing woad too, huh?

Fucking morons ... and you're probably the same people who tell others not to be sheep.

>>718609093
You stab me with your feel knifes

>>718602072
Italian rennaisance id be a vampire/serial killer killing whores.

>>718604902
don't wallow in it.

>>718605092
The metaphor is flawed in the sense that the ink doesn't do cool shit, the parchment has a grain.

So before the big bang, there was a predetermined grain to be followed, and the big bang filled in the gaps.

Real thought provoking.

>>718602072
kill lincoln and keep niggers from being "equals"

>>718611490
Because Shimazu Yoshihiro survived and didn't have to deal with the consequences of losing the war since he lived so far from Kyoto that administrating their clan was next to impossible, and he was a fucking baller ass Samurai, easily one of the best from the period. Defeated an army in Korea over 1-4 odds, and when told to hold a position and basically use a battle he nearly charged at the enemy alone in a suicidal attack, but was conviced not to. Plus he fought in the Battle of Siegekihara and survived.
He was an incredible Samurai, my favorite. My time traveler dream is to see him battle one day, if we are so lucky to invent the technology required for that.

>>718612664
lose a battle* fml

>>718602072
1990's have 2 bil

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>>718611915
Somehow you know how i was educated in history.. weird..
Advice: Chill, have a wank, go to bed, it will be ok in the morning..

sweet dreams cupcake

>>718612664
True, it's a great story, but serving him most likely would put you in the middle of the losing side at Sekigahara, and you'd probably die was my point. He was an amazing warrior though.

>>718602072
Any time when child brides were allowed so I could be a child bride. I want to be a little preteen girl married to a big strong man and get fucked by his big adult dick in my little pussy and be a good wife for him and give him lots of babies.

>>718611490
Miyamoto Musashi was from the 1400's. He's one of my idols. He's the real life Captain Jack Sparrow but Asian as fuck and killed literally everyone till he stopped having challengers and just started teaching.

50s and stop the day the Music Died cos I'm a fag.

Stalin.

Way underrated imo, killed way more Jews than Hitler.

>>718613133
To die in service of such a man would be to die with honor indeed. Besides, not everyone died, and Yoshihiro didn't even engage in direct combat at first because (this is hilarious) the commanding officer was apparently not officially licensed to give him orders. Kek n' respect.
Say I served with him tho in Korea, in that battle where he was horribly outnumbered and still won, now THAT would have been something to see.

>>718602072
>viking
That's a really, really shit time/period to go back to OP.
I know the movies are cool. But life was total shit for them.

>>718604902
its not a rhetorical question

>>718602072
Peak of the Roman Empire.
A centurion.

I'd go back in time and kill myself as an infant.

>>718604902
Man now you've given me the feels.
I've been thinking about how much I miss her again lately.
Life's too fleeting bro.

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Before time...before earth...before man...before existence.


GOD

>>718613304
he was born in 1584. but yes, i'd love to be his student. would be very interesting. i'd also go for Iizasa Chōisai Ienao, Tsukahara Bokuden, Yagyū Munenori, Hōzōin Kakuzenbō In'ei, or Ittōsai Kagehisa.

>>718613629
that would be truly amazing, definitely.

>>718614266
Can you imagine a duel between Shimazu Yoshihiro and Mayamoto Musashi? God, who would win? Probably Musashi but it would be extremely close.

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>>718613951
I know that feel.

>>718614999
depends when they met. musashi was like 49 years younger. at yoshihiro's peak, musashi would just be a young kid, and musashi's peak, yoshihiro would be an old man.

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>>718602072
15th century Germany to be a limewood sculptor

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>>718602072
>>718602072
>>718602072

>>718602072
turn of the 20th century ... New York ... in Tesla laboratory

>>718616471
Somewhere in the middle?

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Slavery time, but I'd take a video camera with me and I'd slaughter all the whites