HELP ME /b/! Chickens are trying to break into my house!

>>718437883
God speed you magnificent bastard

>>718437883
stick your cock out the window and pretend it's a rooster
slap them each in the face with it to secure your cock's place in the pecking order
once you have done this they will all fall in line and follow your cock's orders
god's speed

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>>718437883
birds are friendly animals

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>>718437970
>>718438026
Ahhhh!

>>718437883
Capture them and leave them in a cage with each other to starve, wait until one of them becomes the alpha cock and proceeds to eat the others, keep this cock as your champion.

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When they break in, close your eyes so they don't Peck them out!!

>>718438128
There is no escape. I'm sorry op. This is it

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oh thank goodness they're gone

>>718437883
> come out nigga we jus wanna talk

Turn them in to nuggers

>>718438426
They'll be back. You just wait op

>>718438426
They are trying to lull you into a false sense of security until they strike. You gon die nigga.

Good thing you've got that cock-blocking window

>>718438426
They are bringing in reinforcements.
But seriously op Where the fuck do you live? Stray chickens in the streets?

>>718438694
this
chickens are incredibly intelligent hunters
i mean they are descendants of dinosaurs
i guarantee you right now they are checking the perimeter of the house for any structural weaknesses they can take advantage of
it won't be long now before they are in the vents
don't underestimate them OP, better lockdown now before it's too late.

>>718437883
they are getting more clan members at this very moment your house will soon be under a angerbird assault and that house will be crumbling down on you

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>>718439140
>>718438953
I went outside to investigate.
they spotted me and i had to run my ass back inside

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>>718439385
Kek Jesus Christ they are out to get you

>>718439385
One of them is a nigger chicken, you fucked OP

>>718439385
Day of the rope begins with chickens rising up with the battle cry of "NO MORE TENDIES"

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Shit they're back at the window

>>718439585
"The day of men is over, the time of the chickens has come"

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>>718439933
Kek someone screen cap this shit

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son you're fine, they're all pale-colored hens.

if pic related shows up, CALL 911.

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>>718439999
ARISE CHICKEN!
CHICKEN!
ARISE!
ARISE!
CHICKEN ARISE!
ARISE CHICKEN!

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>>718439933
Are there any anons out there who can assist!!!!!!!??????

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He's Just standing There... Menacingly!

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>>718440324
Kek arm up!!!!! Grab some freedom

>>718439933
don't let that nigger cock cuck you OP
get out there and slap it in the face with your cock to put it's in your place and establish your role in the hierarchy of the pecking order
conquer your fears
stand tall and proud
cock slap that little bastard and take your place as a god among chickens
it is your destiny OP

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This was a fighting rooster we rescued.

We named him Jean-Pierre. Because he loves to dance.

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>>718439385
Bad news OP...

the one circled in red is a HAWK

this is my favorite thread of the morning
cheers OP

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it's not just you OP...

I JUST looked out of my window

:O

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oh my god

>>718440735
>:O
Get out

OOhhh tendries delivery. Well thought OP.

>>718440735
You got whole fucking zoo out there mate. Time to fire up the grill.

>>718441288
Dude grab some weapons or something. That fucker is about to break that window and Cuck the life out of you

Best thread so far, 2017

>>718437883
let them in, chickenophobe

>>718439385
for maximum efficiency you should insulate and enclose that water heater

>>718441543
He is in 4chin, already a cuck provably. I bet he fucks his mother and makes him watch.

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>>718440087

>>718441693
>for maximum efficiency you should insulate and enclose that water heater

Photo full of chicks. Looks at the water heater. Found the authist.

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>>718441288
you gotta lash out OP. grab a shield and a sword of some sort and let out a gut wrenching war cry as you charge at them. post vid.

>>718441775
eh theyre just chicks if you've seen one you've seen them all! my priority is proper plumbing practices! And would an authist be an autistic author by chance?

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>>718441543
will a baseball bat do?

>>718441775
I was too busy looking at the cocks.

>>718441998
How many image boards would an autist post in if autists posted in image boards?

>>718437883
RELEASE A CAT

>>718442004
Kek that'll do. Now hold the line!!!!

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>>718442004
i think it's working

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>>718442205
Ohhhh shit here we go

https://youtu.be/628_RmtaQvU

EEE