Whats the weirdest and/or the shittiest gift you've ever gotten?

>>717871579
So my birthday is the 27th of December. One time, my grandparents gave me a dollhouse for christmas, and the dolls for my birthday. They were in town with us for the whole 3 days, as well, so I just had to wait before I could play with anything other than an empty fucking house.

>>717871579
a plastic cup with my name engraved

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>>717871579
I got an encyclopedic dictionary once. still have it - best gift ever.
Worst gift ever? Body wash.

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My life

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>>717871579
A card.

Fucking useless, and the thought isn't what counts, it's my personal enjoyment of the gift. I'd honestly trade any given card for socks or some shit because at least there's something practical even if I can't enjoy it.

Two years ago my dad and stepmother, instead of giving me a Christmas present, made a donation in my name to a Beaver preservation charity.

A block of cheese

>>717872630
>>717872630
I hunt beavers, i literally kill what your parents tried to save, i killed your Christmas present

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>>717872630
Kill them, with beavers.

>>717873066
I was so pissed off with what a shit present it was, I wanted to go out and kill beavers too. I'm on your side.
I bet you don't kill them in North Devon though... that's where they were saving them. Ridiculous. I'm 34 years old. Send money to your son not to beavers damn it.

a bottle of old, shitty nuts

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>>717873066
>>717873159
This kills the beaver.

Some plain white clothing (a few shirts long sleeve and short) that were several sizes to big

I was given one of those kits that tell you what your genes are made of.
Cool gift right?
Its because I was adopted, they had told me me a week prior

>>717873369
I'm sure the beaver will be somewhat comforted that it is taking two humans down with it into hell

>>717873263
>I'm on your side.
even tho i killed your presents?
>North Devon
nope

>>717873369
indeed it does

>>717873808
>hell
Jesus Christ fuck off

>>717873797
1/10
they should of let you find out with that kit

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>>717871579
what did you do with your cock?

>>717871579
a book in russian about eagles... i know dad meant well, but...

>>717874004
Yeah, they were curious about it.
The test came back, said they were denim

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>>717873933
>>717874304

>>717873829
If you kill them all maybe I'll get better presents in the future.
I Ben just found the card with a picture of a beaver on it but can post the pic as the file is too large. The beavers are still mocking me.

>>717874416
* I even
** can't

>>717871579
My parents gave me a suitcase on my 18th birthday and told me to GTFO. It was a really nice suitcase.

For my 30th birthday, my wife bought me some Halo Toys. Not even cool ones, just whatever was at Gamestop at the time. Didn't even get birthday sex...
Thankfully, I went out to some seedy lap dance place with my friends and got my dick sucked by a hot 19 yo blonde.

>>717871934
Gift implies selfless giving. Not lusty teenaged profilactic mishaps.

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Andy sixx's wwrm log roll slidding down my throat...
...doesnt get any shittier than that

>>717871832
Damn. They could've at least given you the dolls first. That's harsh.

>>717875324
Why did this start? I don't get it.

>>717871579
My in-laws gave me after-shave for Xmas.
I have had a full beard for 5 years.

>>717876522
Yeah please someone explain did he do scat or something?

One of those dancing flowers that moved whenever there was a radio playing nearby. They were a tacky trend in the 80s. This was under the tree for Christmas when I was 16. Worst fucking gift ever from my parents. The only value I got from it was taking out the batteries for my walkman.

>>717871832
tits or gtfo

>>717871579
Gf gave me a 10 dollar cheap replica watch
Looks great

But ... 10 dollars man
I mean I wear it as to not hurt her feelings
But 10 dollars....

a dr who encyclopedia

i do not like dr who. family does, i sit through it and make funs

>>717877353
thats cold as ice

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>>717878969
I'm a guy. I have porn, though.

>>717871579
A fat friend of a friend once put her panties into my suit pocket while she bit her lip


She was trying to be sexy, but they were so dirty they were yellow, they stank so fucking much

I made her suck me off but didn't fuck her
She had jelly thighs, some people are just plain disgusting

>Inb4 fat shaming

>>717871579
Weirdest gift I've ever gotten was an actual dildo for Christmas. I switched the From: To: tickets around on my sisters present on accident. I was too into watching my older brother playing Duke Nukeum on the lava level and wasn't listening to my older sister telling me which tag goes where and which presents to keep out/go under the tree.

Technically, it wasn't meant for me, but I did get to keep it for a few minutes.

>>717875054
You sound like a child that's why she bought you toys pussy

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>>717871579
ausfag, here: A beach towel, for Christmas
5 months after, that is.

my dad brought me a ford instead of a mercedes. Now i drive around in a bag of shit

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>>717871867
>having such a bad personal hygiene that you receive body wash as a gift
being a neet looks hard

>>717873263
your parents gave you this when you were 34 years old?
and you complain on a board full of teenagers about it?
what kind of fucking retarded family are you?
please don't breed my man.

>>717877353
It's called a fucking hint anon

>>717871579
I got a clown head stuffed with tiny babies and hands that you can put on your fingers.

>For my ninth birthday my sister gave me deodorant...
>For my 16th birthday I was given like 50 cans of sardines.
>For my 18th birthday I was kicked out of the house.

And that's just birthdays.

>>717883438
That's actually pretty funny with the sardines.

My dad got arrested on my 15th when I was on holiday at the time and pretty much stopped getting presents after that. Then I got kicked out straight after my 16th.

My gf got me nipple chocolates

>>717871579
The gift of life

>>717881978
Nah, I'm not that bad, it's more like one of those gifts you give people because you either can't think of anything or don't want to spend much on them (especially because you feel obligated to give a gift to them). One of these people who I have in mind gave everybody body wash one year...

>>717884234
The heck are nipple chocolates?

>>717874302
You are not Russian?

>>717875054
Is your wife not very good looking?

>>717875324
Never heard of him, go away.

A bag of dogshit

>>717883438
Awesome, sardines are great. I would be quite happy with that.

>>717885542
>>717884234
It was like a huge basket of sardines made to look like an actual gift, I dislike sardines very much...

>>717880161
so you were so gay that even your grandparents could see it way before you actually came out of the closet?
damn that's gay

>>717872234
kek i love cards and hate gifts

my family always buys me shitty clothes
below walmart quality shirts and socks clothes
clothes 5 sizes above me

will take the card any time

>>717884646
google is your friend you piece of shit

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>>717871579
>>717871579
succ from mother

>>717871579
How the fuck do you do that with your hand?

>>717886040
They could have made a hamper of almost anything else and it would have been more desirable

>>717879870
this is why you take the tag off folks..

>>717881556
god i can only hope to satan this is bait.

A car batterie at the age of 5

>>717881556
Well that's your fault for trading it in for a Chevy

>>717888317
they were trying to make you interested in engineering and stuff
did they succeed?

No for 2 reasons
1-they did it for a joke
2-they took it away as soon as i got it

>>717871579
I got cringy nerdy as fuck star wars socks that are too small from my GF's mom this christmas. They have darth vader on them and say "use the force". For some reason she thinks I'm super into star wars.

be poorfag
shoes have multiple holes in them and are about five years old
open gift, a shoebox, my size. "Holy fuck, yes!"
was a one dollar pair of gloves.

I will never forgive that bullshit. One look at the bitches face and I knew she did it on purpose.