I wrote a poem for my 18 yo classmate who I plan to confess my love to. Tell me what you think, please.
I love a girl with bright blue eyes Her tongue it speaks of love not lies If she'd command me down on her I'd quickly fall then on my knees And would not mind I aim to please Till she would like a kitten purr
I love a girl with fire hair Her soft lips touch I could not bear around my cock for more than one a quarter of an hour but If I could stick it in her butt Then all my worries would be gone
I love a girl with virgin thighs A redhaired maid with bright blue eyes And speak to her of love not lust However if she seeks to know Physical love, a hearty plough My nut in her I'd gladly bust
A mote dances, carried hither and thither by your panting breath. A pause ........ as the rod slides deeper, you shudder. Your pulsation increases, veins pumping and heart beating so that it might leave your body. You thrust back.... every inch the newfag.
>>717700726 Excellent. I appreciate that you took time to use a more sophisticated rhyme scheme than the usual ABAB crap): AAB/CCB is interesting Your scansion is decent, though a but/butt is a lame rhyme, and a little more enjambment would improve the flow. A solid A-. (The funniest part is that I actually am an English professor, and of course nobody will believe me).
OP don't embarrass yourself. If she sees the amount of failed rhymes in this poem you'll never get her to fuck. Avoid synonyms like but and butt, just sounds shitty when you read aloud. One and gone, are you fuckin kidding me. Know and plough, again, you fuckin kidding? I love a girl with virgin thighs, you better be pretty damn confident about that.
Also, the whole premise sucks dick. Ask her to the movies or some shit like a halfway normal person.
>>717703962 But who the hell pronounces "plough" to rhyme with "know"? The purring kitten thing was stupid too, especially the word ordering, even making allowances for poetic license. Also "one a quarter"??? Plus attempting to rhyme one with gone, which is only possible in Middle English, not Modern English, and it's highly doubtful she speaks Middle English. Also describing her as a virgin is a bit presumptuous on his part. Not that this could ever be considered a serious thread... nobody could be socially retarded enough to use this as a mating call.
>>717700726 You can't confess your love for her unless you are in an established relationship. You don't love her. Even though the OP is a troll as the poem is sex predator tier, that needed stating in case anyone forgot or didn't know.
>>717700726 >I love a bitch with bright blue eyes >I wanna put my tongue between her thighs >She might look away cause i have Downs >but I eat pussy better than most of you clowns >And I would not mind I aim to please >Just gimme a chance between them knees
>I love a ho with no pussy hair >Little pink lips, not a grizzly bear >My hand around my cock for an hour or more >I edge until I can't then watch my semen pour >I'd raped that ass and cum in her butt >But I fap alone cause I got no guts
>I love a little girl with virgin thighs >I'd take her to my basement, keep her locked inside >And speak to her of love not lust >Chain around her ankle because I don't trust >Rape rape rape just every day >Then the other kids won't think I'm gay
>>717704901 >/10 would employ if there was a market for shit like this, but there's not)
I like you.
Who can fathom, the thought of one, that could make a lady swoon, with a simple word, a sultry wink, a kiss beneath the moon. A kind anon, with simple ways, belying a gallant heart, who with but a simple word... appreciates my art.
>>717700726 ffs op, confessing your love will just crush your chances how ever they had stand. Girls want indipendent men, not needy boys. This is huge turnoff. Go to a gym, get training (maybe ato a gym for 6 month) to get some self confidence about yourself and then just ask her directly out
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