Things about you that are true but everyone will think you're

>>714919338
Two questions:
1 did she take her shirt off?
2 can you post a yearbook pic or something?

>>714920171
She didn't take her shirt off but she let me grab her titties. They were small. I never purchased a yearbook

I have the ability of passive telepathy. Not something that fills a lot in my life, but it's there.

>>714919338
>>714920171
Yes, post yearbook, OP. I will give you one high five and one low five.

>>714920308
>I never purchased a yearbook
You lying faggot.

Let's get outta here, c'mon guys

In my 30s and over the last 5 years I've only dated girls in their mid teens and my last 3 gfs have all drank their piss and ate their poop for me.

i can suck my own penis :)

>>714919338
I've been under federal government surveillance for the past few years, online and offline.

>>714920330
Elaborate. Sometimes I can sense things in the near future and a feeling of overwhelming certainty comes over me

>>714919338
are you good looking?

I peed on a girl by accident when I was 13, can give greentext story if someone wants.

>At age 4, I created my own type of 'Capital Pi' notation for summation of sequences.
>By the time I was 5, I was better at arithmetic than all of my teachers.
>By 7, I had came up with a method to sum arithmetic sequences, similar to what the 'Prince of Mathematics' Carl Gauss did when he was 10.
>When I was 8, I had independently devised the concept of mechanical moments.

>>714920492
Why would I? I wasn't friends with many people and I just talked about some bands I liked with Ariana once towards the end of the year and things snowballed from there. Her friends didn't like me

I started a VR company and just secured our 4th big contract. I have made more money in 6 months than I have in 5 years working for one of the world's largest game publishers. Feels pretty gud

>>714920499

Teach us your secret.

>>714920577
I'm average

>>714920722
Gun to their head.

>>714920685
Ogarnij sie Blazej

>>714920554
I tend to think about bad stuff right before it happens.
>elaborate
I somehow pick up on people who are near me's thoughts, and experience them as my own. There's no certain feel to them or anything, and it seems to be pretty random stuff. Mostly if they suddenly think of a question or get an idea.

>>714920554
I have that too. Like bizzaire Dejavu. I just know that ive seen this happen before and know what is about to happen.

Has never been useful. Always shorter than 30 seconds. I gennerally become aware it is happening as it is about to end its course.

Call me a liar idgaf.

>>714919338
Did she swallow?

>>714920954
When we had a scholarship banquet I could "feel" which one would be awarded to me and because I despise going up to the stage I had this immense dread pour over me only at the specific scholarships I would win

>>714919338
greentext pls

>>714920502
kekked surprisingly hard, have fun with that mate!

>>714921016
No, she spit it in the toilet and I came after approximately a minute and a half. My legs were shaking

>>714921166
was she good?

>>714919338
He and I fucked messy dubai

>>714919338
I have murdered 6 separate transients across 4 states in the past three years.

>>714919338
obviously bullshit. you gotta have some kind of proof or tell some story people dont know about her man

>>714921294
Jessy fucking mobile

>>714921166
Just a blowjob?

>>714921166
aw you nigger, you should've lasted longer

>>714921059
That's pretty neat. Most useful thing that ever happened to me was impressing a girl at a bonfire cus I just knew that a casual aquaintence was about to arrive with his girl friend, and the first thing he would say getting out of the car. It happend exactly as I said less than a minute later.

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>>714919338

>>714919338

my great aunt is the supreme nun in the vatican and I am related to "The Veronicas"

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>>714919338

>>714921161
With powers like these how could i not be having fun ;)

(S.W.I.M) murder their rapist after days of torturing them

>>714921080
There's not much to tell. In English we were paired up together for a project reenacting a scene from Julius Caesar in modern vernacular, and somehow I brought up "Spoon," which is a band she apparently likes "Go figure" and we started talking about our favorite songs and later exchanged numbers. A few days later she picked me up to begin filming the project at her house and we were putting on her makeup in the bathroom and eventually started kissing and it led to her blowing me

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>>714921309
um...

>>714921342
Well I also got to massage her titties

>>714921578
Slut

>>714920685
What exactly are you doing?
>inb4 vr bestiallity

My grandmother dated David Duke, founder of the Knights of the Ku Klux Klan, in highschool

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>>714921455

>>714920631
Why did you stop when you were 8

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The Ghost pasta is true. There was a massive gangbang and I participated. Came inside every hole of her. Icarly bitch is a coked out nympho.

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>>714921731

>>714919338
Ive shit on another guys chest

>>714921236
Yes, she apparently had a lot of experience

>>714920722
Find girls that are needy, insecure. Nerdy girls and emo/scene girls fit this good. Go slow, interesting, don't be a creep and send dick pics. You need them to slowly fall in love with you. Girls like this will latch on to you and love you so much they'll do almost anything for you. I've gotten them to even secretly record their mom and sisters and fuck the dog.

If you want them to do some crazy sexual stuff like i did, you have to explain it right. Easiest thing to do is getting them to drink your piss..explain how it's good for you even and easier to swallow than cum. You just need to convince them. I convinced them to eat their poo by saying they're beautiful and everything coming out of them was beautiful as well. Start slow..just watching them take a dump on the floor is good.
Also you can meet these girls online in many places. There's various scene emo forums and shit and even just random chick's you find that live by you.

>>714921645
That's hot. It was a good tittyfuck?

>>714920642
Yeah okay, obviously you're just a massive faggot

>>714920330
Or you're mentally ill. Whichever.

I've met the Queen of England (and Philip)

>>714921795
4chan happened

>>714921890
I didn't get to place my penis on her titties, I just kind of grabbed them and moved them up and down under her shirt

>>714921455
>nun in the vatican
you got no idea how the things work pal

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>>714921731

this is another of our cousins

it's not as impossible as you'd think

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>>714921973

>>714921913
I've considered that a lot. But through my experiences, I've come to the conclusion that I'm not.

I lost my virginity to an escort at 18 years old and to this day it has been one of the best girls i have ever fucked.

>>714921855
did she deepthroat? how big are you?

>>714919338
Nice. I got rimmed by Madonna during her 1987 tour while trimming her bush. She said she wanted to do something off the wall and I agreed. Ripley bitch.

>>714922027
I am 6.5 inches and she didn't deepthroat. She was very good at it though

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>>714921973

Sorry, loaded thumbnail

>>714921844
They're so far away from the family most of the time that I basically wouldn't recognise her so this doesn't bother me in the slightest.

>>714921682
Using photogrammetry to bring landmarks and national heritage pieces into VR. We just secured a contract with the royal museum of London to bring all of their world war 1/2 weapons into an interactive environment.

>>714921966
Was she drunk? Did you tried to fuck her?

I'll just not fuck up this time, gf and I fucked jessy Dubai

I ate Chloe Grace Moretz out

>>714922073
she use her hands? what kind of technique?

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>>714921795
>got surgery to fix a problem with my spleen
>mfw they found i was full of shit

>>714921814
pics or it didn't happen

>>714922174
The ol' lary

>>714922114
She wasn't drunk and we didn't fuck because her parents were home

>>714922174
>>714922114
niggers, are you seriously this obsessed with her?

>>714922109
Britfag here. There is no Royal Museum of London

>>714919338
Coward from Broward.

This isn't like the other claims here but I was a young kid skating around a northern California town and happened upon a band rehearsing in someone's garage and later realized it was Sublime just a month before the singer OD'd.

>>714922174
She used the corkscrew technique and could suck like a motherfucker

>op acting like getting head from some ugly spic is an achievement

>>714922222
Nice quints

>>714921703
This is pretty believable actually. Lot less people in the world back then

>>714922222
Wasted quints

>>714922287
Did you just pass by or is there more to it?

>>714922223
That's so stupid that it can be true. Now I believe you, anon. How old were you?

>>714919338
>North Broward Preparatory School
Post Diploma

>>714922250
secret royal britfag here
yes there is

>>714922194
Kek

>>714921795
Spent the majority of my adolescence hiding that shit, it became clear popularity is inversely proportional to academic performance, especially in mathematics. Then got into 4ch.

Ended up turning around, top masters degree and all that.

>>714922222
Gets

>I died in a car accident 13 years ago and none of this is real.

>>714922415
16

>>714922222
FUCK YOU NIGGER

>>714922468
i wish nigger

I tried to OD twice

>>714920954
You should get into stock trading

>>714922346
Shes italian

>>714919338
I fucked Julia 'Boin' last year in Roppongi, met her at the hostess club at Red Dragon after she got off work. I bought her drinks in the club but after was free and her choosing. Best night of my life.

>>714922222
damn

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I have 2 girlfriends, both of whom want my dick really bad tonight and have been talking dirty all day about it trying to get me to come over.

I'm wondering if I should fuck them both tonight or just 1 and let the other come over tomorrow morning.

Decisions decisions.

>>714921814
Story of it?

>>714922689
proof

>>714921814
I want to read this pasta

>>714922409
stfu single pleb

>>714922419
I"m in college dude, why would I have my high school diploma present in my dorm?

>>714920859
I, too, experience confirmation bias.

>>714922766
same

>>714922689
I could believe that

>>714922413
At the time I was just getting into the guitar so I stopped and made my friends (who could have cared less) to stay there. I remember vividly swaying to Santaria board in hand thinking how good they were and how familiar they sounded.

>>714922222
>>714922468
Ol' Lary is dead and O'Riley don't know it
O'Riley is dead and ol' Lary don't know it
They both are dead in the very same bed
And neither one knows that the other is dead

Used to fuck Ariel Winter when she lived with her mom. One time she literally walked in on us in cowgirl with her titties flopping around and she just closed the door and said "I'll come back later, jeez"

>>714923034
what were those tits like, and where did you cum?

>>714923153
They were huge obviously and I came in the condom. She had some in her drawers

Next to my normal job i kill people for money.

>>714923153
>titty-y
>titties
wtf do you expect...

>>714923257
>you must be loco
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qFrY4VcbMU

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I just licked out my little cousins pussy and ass and sucked her toes the other day.
She's been trying to get with me for a while, but i backed off and didn't know if she was serious or just a hoe.
I posted her kik here a few days to see if she was serious about me, she passed the test, now she's my little cum slut gf. She gave me her used panties as well since we can't see each other much. I plan on buying her many sexy things and a buttplug to wear when we're out.

>>714919338
>Things about you that are true but everyone will think you're a liar and so you don't bother telling anyone

I believe you based on the fact no one would lie about fucking that ugly ass face.

>>714923257
Ain't you making enough money by killing ppl?

>>714922883
Cont.

My Brother had their Robbin' The Hood album and I recognized the melody and bass line from Lincoln Highway Dub. I told him I heard these guys live up in Arcata and he didn't believe me. Also, as a young kid, I met Hefe from NOFX outside his club in Eureka Ca.

>>714922830
I've read about that too. Not what I'm experiencing. I've experienced things that simply cannot be explained by anything else than some kind of telepathy.

I got a teacher fired by letting out an anonymous tip that he was giving out tests before we took them to certain students. The guy was a fucking creeper.

>>714923536
That's how you get your personal downy, anon

>>714919338
Goebbels was the great uncle of the gf that i dated through most of the 4 years of high school back in 94-99. Her grandmother changed the last name to Goebel when she came here after the nazi takeover. I've seen pictures and writings that nobody else has seen , including as far as I know, most if not all historians.

Broke up senior year. Met up one night just by chance couple years later 2001-2 something like that, fucked her, left next morning and havent seen her since as I moved a good distance away and do not keep any real social media accounts.

I kick myself all the time for not taking a "souvenir" because I didn't understand the importance at the time. I was too busy chasing the pussy and being a naive liberal. Please forgive me /b/...

>>714923710
Sure, of all the fuckers convinced they are special you are the only one who truly is...

>>714923710
And I keep experiencing them.

>>714919338
I am the only real person in the universe and everyone else is just a projected illusion.
not sure what the purpose of this world is but what I do know for sure is none of you are real.

>>714923631
Dont do it that often and only in the winter. Its just for extra cash.

>>714922766
>>714922854
>I remember the first time I went to a USC party that Miranda Cosgrove was at.
>It was at a frat house and I was hanging out and talking to people when this huge guy, probably around 6'5 came up to me and grabbed me by the shoulder and told me very sternly to "come with me, newblood". He led me down to the basement, and that's when I saw her.
>She was completely naked, on her hands and knees, on top of a large blue tarp. A single bare lightbulb swung from the ceiling, and two massive football players were fucking her, one in the ass and one in the mouth. Her eyes were rolled into the back of her head, and she was covered in semen. The words "COCKGOBBLER" were scrawled on her forehead in permanent marker . The one fucking her in the mouth bust a nut down her throat, and she swallowed it all. She then started screaming "FUNNY POWDER, FUNNY POWDER" over and over at the top of her lungs. The guy that led me in handed me a ceramic plate covered in cocaine and instructed me to blow some in her face. I bent down in front of her and she coughed up a huge glob of cum onto the tarp and looked at me in the eyes, all while still beng fucked in the ass. I grabbed a handful of cocaine and placing it in my palm, I blew it in her face. I had tears in my eyes and silently mouthed "but you were in iCarly". I stood up and another massive jock took my spot and started ramming her in the mouth. I then tried to leave but the guy who took me to the room told me "you have to stay until all the coke is gone lardlungs". I sobbed for the next 3 hours doing my duty until all the men were satisfied and she was passed out in a pool of jizz.
>It was the worst night of my life.
That's the pasta floating around. But we did with her worse shit. That's pretty vanilla stuff actually. Bitch is crazy, seriously.

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>>714922222

My mum can predict maritime disasters in her dreams. She's a devout Catholic, it terrifies her

>>714923918
i hope that's true

>>714923933
Checked
Also why are you not going full professional?

>>714923536
I fucking hate footfags

>>714920807
Nie nazywaj mnie tak, chuju.

>>714919338
i was friends with the porn star Megan Rain in high school

>>714922222
I appreciate your digits

>>714923991
Define worse shit.

>>714922222
WITNESSED

>>714924058
You know in your heart that it is because I unconsciously formed your heart.

>>714923933
Can I have an apprenticeship?

>>714920859
I.e. Schizophrenia and Special Snowflake Syndrome.

I'll believe you if you have James Ramsey's check in your hand. Until then, go fuck yourself. Your faggot psychic friend as well.

>>714924080
Also into armpits..I'm big on smells. Also sweaty girls. It'll happen to you too if you find the right girl.

>>714924270
Fuck autocorrect. James Randi.

>>714923991
>sobbed for the next 3 hours
what the fuck

>>714922109
I do a lot of photogrammetry for fun. I'm good at it. How can I turn it into a profitable occupation?

>>714919338

From KY. My friends and I use to fuck Cody Lane and her cousin that lived down the hall from me when Cody would stay the night with her 17 years ago.

>>714923240
She already had Trojan magnums on hand which I found amusing. Her favorite position was doggy style

>>714924404
Visit your local royal museum and make a deal

>>714924319
I like athletic dominant girls

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>>714919338
I'm friends with Ariana and she told me about this at a party last summer. She said it was significant becous it was the smallest dick she'd ever sucked and that you came after about 15 seconds. I whould go on to fuck her brains out. And my dick is pick related

Between the ages of 11 and 13 I sucked my ~30something neighbour's dick and took it up the ass almost daily.

I am not a girl.

>>714923991

Yes she's that crazy but still apparently got everyone involved to sign NDAs since nobody has ever made that claim under their real identity, and somehow nobody involved snapped a pic which they'd be fully aware would be worth thousands of dollars if not more, if not just to share for the fun of it, where someone would eventually post it.

>>714922028
I love Madonna. But she was at her most attractive around 2008, not before.

>>714924580
you're a woman

>>714924146
We did with everything we could think of... double penetrate every hole, insane anal train for almost two hours, BDSM, rough spanking, tied her up, fucked her for almost 14 hours... It was so crazy at times that everybody was, you know, with "that crazy look". I remember fucking her ass like crazy and thinking: "we are going to destroy her asshole".

>>714919338

I stopped a rape/ homicide when I was drunk. All I remember was yelling at some dude to get off a girl in an alley and then I remember kicking him in the face.

Then I remember walking her home.

The rest is fuzzy.

>>714924070
Because its not like in the movies. When they tell me who needs to be put down. I just follow them. Wait for a moment. Run up to them and shoot. Thats also wy i only do it in the winter. So its not suspicious when i walk with a scarf hiding my face and with my hoodie.

>>714919338

>killed one person in self defense
>killed another hand to hand in war
>15 yrs old a two star general let me fly a t38 for two minutes with him in the instructor seat. I basically did barrel rolls and shit...was cash
>was a fat nerd who got fit and lost v card to cheer leader. She feel in love with me and I dumped her.
>grew in california and have met a bunch of celebrities. Best experience was with arnold schartzanegar when he was gov.

I mean things people WONT believe?

>I've seen and met an actual alien on a mission in NV. Tall humanoid. Didnt touch, didnt talk, i just nodded, it did a blink thing slowly to acknowledge my gesture.

My life is pretty sweet.

>>714924884
plot twist you raped her

>>714924539
The last time I went to my local museum making a somewhat similar offer (scanning old manuscripts), they laughed at me. They said that they advertise their jobs publicly and then pick the candidate. Not the other way round. Not employing people from the street.

>>714924208
Dont think you can learn allot from me. I dont donit the way they show you in the movies.

>>714924569

No way?! Same thing happened to me at a party 4 months ago out on the Tradewinds sea org. Except she said she met this guy at a party 8 Months prior and that she thought she had seen the tiniest dick at an even earlier party in some bathroom, but this guy took the cake . She was even reluctant to say it was a guy because I may have been a swollen clit. Heh, weird stuff .

>>714924620
There was no NDAs. Simply, that happen at a fraternity party.

>>714924929
I believe all of that except the fact that the alien was humanoid

>>714924792
I am a dude.

>>714924929
Out of all the horse shit itt yours is the worst

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Had sex with Arielle Kebbel when she was in my acting class in Tampa.
Also banged two other hotties that were in that same class but they never made it semi-famous like Arielle.

>>714920554
>>714920954
have the same shit, damn

>>714925012
No but I don't have the connections

>>714923991
Real or not, that's so hot. Worth a fap.

>>714920554
or you can actually pick p on regular information and come to conclusions based on things anybody else can see or hear. just subconsciously

>>714925020

Not a chance an even like that went down at a crowded frat party, yet nobody involved ever spoke of it, and nobody took a picture. it defies simple logic. there'd be tons of pics. even if a non-celebrity did something like that, people would have their phones out. a celebrity? fuck.

>>714920954
I remember once I saw a shit of mine that looked exactly like the shit I took in a recurring dream. It was a nice clean poop.

>>714924129
Interesting. I take it she was a sweet girl who wasn't especially smart.

>>714923991
A Hollywood teen star being a coked out slut. Why not? Probably it's true.

>>714925323
No, I do that to from analyzing body language and vocal cues, but this is much different

>>714925406
Sorry, dude. You will never have a proof.

>>714925142

NDA or not im behind seven proxies.

>>714919338
I've never dated anyone. Nobody fucking believes me man.

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>>714922346

I lost my virginity while i was drunk and didn't remember until i was talking about how it sucks being a virgin with my friends.

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>>714925080
>>>/wsg/1416730

>>714925656
why? you sexy?

>>714925789
not particularly, I'm not ugly tho

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>>714925013
Nice try anon, she told me about you to she even sent me this

>>714920554
id say its more of a subconscious tendency to remember certain body language and tones from past events and assert them to current situations. in a sense would be like predicting an outcome or maybe just a heightened mental relex idk super curious about this though

>>714925656
I've never dated anyone either but nobody knows bc i don't talk to anyone

i shit for half an hour, noone somehow believes me.
AMA

>>714925011
>scanning old manuscripts
Kek

Write an email or make a call. Call up different museums if the first ones won't accept your offer. Improve your offer and keep asking.We're talking about money, it's worth a shot.

I'm friends with Bill Nye and he actually browses /sci/ and calls climate change deniers "fucking faggots"

>>714922434
..... im an A student and popularity was never a problem... besides you don't have to be public with your grades....unless you have a personality disorder.... but hiding your int isnt gonna fix that either

>>714925789
Not that anon.
Maybe because dating is prostitution under another name.

>>714926161
Proof

>>714926025
How long do you shit?

>>714926144
Thanks.

>>714926374
like half an hour man

>>714926161
I wouldn't actually be surprised about the bill nye on on /sci/ part

>>714923991
proof. now

>>714926025
>i shit for half an hour, noone somehow believes me.
Tell >>>/wsg/1440321, I guarantee he'll believe you.
Bet accepted?

>>714924929
This is so fake it's laughable. Everything about it is bs. Just cause you're from cali doesn't mean you just randomly meet celebrities, even if you're living in Hollywood, it's still pretty damn rare

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>>714920505
We're still watching you. Phil, my shift partner is actually getting into your fetishes after all this time. Pic related. Phil at his old job.

>>714924369
>>714924270
There's no more Randi Foundation prize you casual faggot.

>>714920505
Why?

>>714926904
did your dad make people get high before he killed them?

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>>714919338
Ugly whitewashed beaner cunt.
Don't know who the fuck this cancerous bitch is but I'm sick of seeing her miserable face on here.

>brown eyes
>literally 0/10

>>714926471
>i shit for half an hour
You're lucky you don't have my psychiatrist. If you did, he would tell you it's part of your mental illness. Anything that makes me not identical to everyone is mental illness for him. Stupid tool.

I am currently Rachel McAdam's fuck buddy and sometimes when we are on the bed watching T.V she just holds my cock and slaps it back and forth. She nicknamed me "Big Dick McGee." Yes, I'm old

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>>714919338
Back in 1996 I had a total recall of all my past life memories from birth to death to birth to death to birth to death... and so on.

In reality I'm over 13,000,000 years of age.

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I had a one-night stand with Clair Holt in 2014 in while I was in New Orleans.

>>714926694
If this is a joke, your post is not doing him any favour, you cunt.

>>714922011
Mentally ill people don't tend to know they're mentally ill.

>>714921876
sounds like you belong in jail

>>714925976
You don't have the Sharingan you're not a genius you're not psychic your just a faggot who wants to be special so desperately you do mental gymnastics to convince yourself your special and important because all other evidence and live experience you have says you aren't.

Grow up and get a fucking job senpai

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>>714919338
I'm close related to the owner of Eurovision Song Contest. No I'm not rich.

>>714928445
*you're
I'm not him

>>714927773
Everyday psychopaths love to use this blatant tautology. Sadly, this includes mental health "experts".

I have a 7 1/2 inch cock with 5 inch girth. It takes me 2 hours of sex to get off it is a curse

Bump for more

I am the 45th President of the United States

>>714924319
Sexy feet and a pita get me diamonds...but not into smell. She has to smell clean and fresh and the feet have to be sparkling clean and not even stubble on the pits. I just love a beautiful high arched foot with long toes and smooth sleek armpits. I think it's about the curvature for me

>>714930083
AMA.

>>714930083
Can believe that. You are one of us.

I have an IQ of 168

>>714930800
I find it hard to believe, or fap to this, for that matter. Notwithstanding, I find your post stimulating and challenging.

>>714930623
>>714930623
When in 2010 I said that the next president will be certain anon from /b/, another anon responded: "God save us if this is true!" I have evidence stowed away somewhere on an old hard drive.

Everyday since 9/11. I check the time at 9:11 in the morning and 9:11 at night. Not intentionally. It can happen on a clock. It an happen on my phone. A microwave, the internet. Whatever the case may be. It happened now. Two people can attest to this. I told my friends and they didn't believe me. After seeing it happen on maybe a dozen separate occasions they also admit that it's weird. They said it must just be my internal clock. Doesn't make it any weirder

>>714930976
Cool. Glad I could help.

>>714931354
*less weird. Sorry