/b/, could you beat a Kangaroo in fight?

Only if I don't get kicked, once you're kicked then you're fucked.

So, probably.

>>714161990
Unlikely. Look at the cunts arms. You're fucked either way.

>>714161283
why's that roo so jacked

>>714161283
Relieve

>>714162184
Because they are fucking monsters. Most Kangaroos are jacked.

Most Kangaroos are small Cunts.
So I'm gonna go with yeah.

The big ones, they don't normally hop right up and attack. There'll be a pause as they get balance on their Tail to kick.
Still pretty quick, but not as quick as say someone spear tackling you. So you should be able to notice when you've pissed one off and it's going to attack.

Their legs will fuck you,
But I'm a tall cunt, So i reckon i got reach on them.
Should be alright.

>>714161283
Why this kangaroo look like he just served 5 years in county

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Um, dude, have you seen what they're actually kicking you with? They have fucking knife feet. Those kicks straight up disembowel you.

I consider myself a reasonably capable person, but my knife tolerance is pretty fucking low.

>>714162170
They don't punch, they kick.

>>714161283
And yes I could. With relative ease.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hGsFdh1SPOA

Where is the gift of that guy knocking one out? Also saw the news store of the guy saving his pupper by decking the kangaroo. I kek'd.

>>714163291
>implying your reach is longer than a kangaroo's kick and that you can reflexively spear it faster than it could kick you
Nobody likes a bogan, mate. Go have a beer and some Macca's. You cunts couldn't even beat a bunch of emu.

>>714163622
See
>>714163504

>>714161283
Fuck that I'd rather go toe to toe with a cassowary

Anyone here who actually thinks they could take a roo like the one in the picture is delusional

One single kick will fuck your shit up.

>>714163766
And you will die slowly without medical care

>>714163291

Kicks ain't the only thing you gotta worry about though dude. Their claws are pretty damn formidable too, and they're strong as hell. All muscle, kangaroos.

He gets his hands on you, he'll rip you to shreds. Claw you up, kick you with his knife-feet, spill yer guts. rip and tear

>>714163651
Emu are 20 times more dangerous han kangaroo. An emu damn near disemboweled Johnny Cash if he had been alone it probably would have killed him.

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>>714163867

See this damn things? Rip and tear, rip you to shreds.

>>714163766
This. People seem to think Roos are fluffy and cuddly. They are fucking giant assholes.

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I could beat a kangaroo in a fight. I would just teleport behind it

>>714161283
Yes, I could beat a stupid kangaroo.
They congregate in mobs with 1 alpha male to fuck all the females. The only big, muscular ones like in the pic are that alpha male, and even then, not every mob has a dude like that in charge.
The average kangaroo, a female that weighs 30kg, I would fuck her shit up.
Those big alpha's have two weapons - the kick which has been known to gut hunting dogs, and they also choke each other out. Both easily avoided by a male human in his prime who knows anything about kangaroos.
Fuck, I really want to fight a kangaroo now and test my medieval hand to hand combat skills

>>714163867
And try to strangle you. as anyone see that video with that guy who straight up punches a roo to save his dog?

I have a webm here of a roo choking another roo unconscious but I can't upload it, it's over the size limit

>>714163938
Yeah, but this was the Australian military. Fuckers had LMGs.
Look it up.

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>>714163938
Nvm
      That was an ostrich

>>714164322
mega it or some shit

You think kangaroos have to fight for thier right to party, or do people just let them party anytime because they're intimidated?

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>>714163938
these fuckers kill more people than roos, emus and ostriches combined

>>714164474
whys the puppper's got flourescent blood?

>>714164036
yea that vid is sick.
He punches a it and the Roo just give him a "you wot m8" look and then the bloke legs it.

>>714164372
scaling it down now... (old computer, it's taking a while to process)
But it looks pretty similar to what this roo >>714164474 is trying to do to the dog

>>714164534
Yes, I've heard they can be much more aggressive than emu's, and they attack not just with their feet but with their bony head. Shorter than an emu but almost as heavy, they're heavy, thick-set bird

>>714164474
That Roo hardly gives a fuck when the bloke hits him

>>714163492
>knife tolerance
>my sides are in orbit

>>714161283
What kind? A red roo I wouldn't fuck with I rather not be disemboweled/drowned

>>714164534
While I believe that you believe that

>Though many humans have been seriously injured by cassowaries, there is only one recorded fatality.

>on average 7 peole are killed every year by ostriches

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This guy did

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2b26bi1wDVY

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Honest question. Who would win between a kangaroo and a platypus?

>>714164372
>>714164010
Fuck it, here's one roo strangling another, jewtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jt1C9qmuh_g

>>714165132
Ostriches are dicks, my neighbor had two and they kept jumping the fence and attacking cars

>>714164872

It's not blood. It's a chest guard to protect from the boars they were actually hunting.

>>714165478
If they were my neighbors they would have had two dead ostriches

>>714161283
l was talking to someone about the time that l sparred a kangaroo yesterday and then l see this thread. wow.

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>>714164997

>>714161283
They're really not that strong, just don't let them kick you. See here;https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uca_CKuTHQc

If you just charge the fucker and beat the shit out of it in close range it can't do anything at all.

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>>714164010

>>714165995
Did you win?

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>>714163504
>And yes I could. With relative ease.

>>714166115
it was an even spar the kangaroo was hopping around and landing jabs l was trying to dodge them having fun but then l gave it a right hook to the face and it's neck didn't even move. l ran for my life and it hopped after me jumped a couple of fences off of the property farm and ran for about 2 miles. it looked like it was going to hop kick me in the stomach so l ran for my life

>>714166087
As a male human.
I could crush that shit excuse for a bucket too.
I just don't because I'm not a disrespectful prick.

>>714166207
and they kinda slap you when they jab but we both wore gloves

>>714166207
>miles

>>714166331
l have been Americanised from all the propaganda

Yes, I'd grab a blunt object to you use as a weapon. As a human I have the capability to use tools and dont see why that shouldn't count.

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>>714166276
>As a male human.
>implying there are kangaroo posters in this thread

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>>714166471
>implying the australian posters aren't kangaroos because the humans/abbos over there still can't read or write

>>714166142
remember thats thing is like 5 ft standing at its tallest..... come on

I have read everything in this thread with an Australian accent

>>714167203
You would be correct

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>>714166365
get your head out of the ground man

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>>714166569
Good point.

>>714166019
>>714166087
>>714166142

careful, you'll start the fucking furries off.

>>714166331
Australia still casually uses miles, feet, pounds, and pints.

>>714167610
Who can't use a pint every now and then?

>>714163504
to be fair the kangaroo in the video is a juvenile

>>714167677
>Every now and then
You mean every half hour on the half hour all day everyday roit?

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>>714161283
Could you...?

I have an 82" reach, so its basicly a matter of do I get tired of punching this thing in the face before he gets tired of getting hit in the face. I suspect I would knock it out though.

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>>714168005
>all that feces all over the ground
do kangaroos really live in their own shit?
or do ausfags have roo farms lol?

>>714168207
It's probably also a matter of getting tired of getting kicked in the fucking face.

>>714168385
I said that you faggot

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>>714168207
so you are saying that one of your arms is almost 7 feet long? Let me guess your dick is also 7 feet long

Never mess with a big red. I mean you might actually beat one... but the risk is that your bowel is on the ground. Not worth the effort.

>>714168449
You dont know how to measure reach do you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bb9K_HUnu2k&feature=youtu.be

>>714168419
YOU getting kicked in the face
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCcLMNcWZOc
2:50++

>>714161283
Yes, because
>I will use anything I can get my hands on to beat that fucking thing
>I do not fight fair
>I get results.

All the people ITT saying they could beat a Roo in a fight obviously haven't seen one. They are freaks of nature. Americans always go on about how dangerous spiders and snakes are in Australia, a Kangaroo is much more terrifying to me.

>>714167610
Oldfags and country bumpkins

>>714162184
Genetic disorder, wipits and cows get it too

>>714168656
At least with a snek, you can crawl to a doctor.

>>714161283
If your Australian sure, usually have to fight 4 of the cunts just walking to my car in the morning


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GO38OEHiHeE

>>714168844
So how's life in the outer suburbs?

Discord for australians.
https://discord.gg/C5EKH2x

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>>714168844

Can you beat a roo in a fight:

So lets put this in perspective for you people who what done think you could beat up a roo.

Firstly, the roo was in the process of STRANGLING A DOG TO DEATH. As the guy runs up to it, you see the roo attempt to DISEMBOWEL said dog offhandedly before starting another fight with the larger, more immediate threat, the guy running towards it.

Then it rears up to full height and only doesn't murder him because it's not been punched before, only scraped by other roos.

If he had stuck around, it's next opener would have been feet right into his guts, at which point he WOULD have died, no question about it.

>>714169361
Same poster: Source, I owned (and was repeatedly owned by) a kangaroo as a child.

>>714168656
Park ranger here, I have had to fight off roos a few times. I knocked one the fuck out with a single punch once. I would shit bricks if one managed to get me in a clinch though.

>>714161283
depends wether i am allowed to damage it propably, but those>>714163492
feet are pretty scary. Guess i would win to like 60%, but i never saw a kangaroo in real life so idk
>>714163942
shieet no i would run

11 years of 5 diffrent martial arts leave their traces m8

>>714170049
Are kangaroos agressive?

>>714161283
I have about 80 lbs on a kangaroo, so unless their muscle density far exceeds my expectations, I could probably just throw my body weight at it, get it to the ground, coil around it and choke it.

>>714169361
This guy knows what he's on about... Another 30 seconds of said 'fight' and that bloke would've been relieved of his intestines. No Christmas for him!

>>714164474
Damn dog, those are rather large gashes. Wonder if he had to be put down as a result.

>>714166861
That's Roger he's like 6'5''

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>>714171578
My bad, actually he's over 6'7'' and he crushed this bucket in seconds

Go for his bloody balls mate

>>714163651
He's not going to spear it you dickhead. He mentions spear tackle because that's what a human can do to you. As in your reactions don't have to be as good as a real fight.

Some people are fucking retarded and don't understand the simplest shit.

>>714171745
I'm 5'9" and about 130lbs. I can literally jump up and down on a 5 gallon bucket and not even bend it.

Fuckin' roos'll rekt my shit

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>>714161283
Not that steroid user, but this small one I can.

>>714170753
Fatass

>>714164872
>>714171301
i dont think they are gashes, i remember seeing this vid in beter res.
Its a pig hunting dog, they wear protective vest/collars that protect thier neck and chest from the pigs tusks. often in fluro colors for visibility.

>>714164077
Why is no one commenting on this?

>>714161283
WE WUZ KANGZAROOZ AND SHEEEIIT