>12 years old
>dad come into my room
>Wakes me up
>Tells me he needs my help
>I get up
>we go into the bathroom
>he pulls it out
>Has me hold it while he pees
>he finishes sends me back to bed
> a few nights later
>Comes in again
>this time he has me rub it, his hand on top of mine
>after he starts to cry
>Tells me hes sorry
>He loves me
>this starts happening every few days.
>Starts having me undress
>starts licking me
>Makes me cum
>He teaches me to blow him
>each time he gets real sad after he cums.
>This goes on for a year
>Now we dont even go to the bathroom
>He eats me out on my bed, and then gets between my legs and beats off and rubs his cock on my pussy until he cums.
>This one time, he stops and asks me if I love him
>I don't answer
>He tells me to tell him that I love him
>I tell him
>he pushes his cock into me.
>Fucks me for the next several years until they get divorced.
>Im all fucked up.
>will go for a while acting normal
>Slowly the desire builds
>Ill rub myself to memories or it
>Soon thats not enough
>At somepoint Ill take an add on CL or go on POF and find an older guy to fuck
>Ask him to use me
>after I climax, I hate myself
>I am disgusting
>and I'll never do it again
>Until the next time
>It eats away at me.
>Never going to have a normal relationship
>Never going to know love
>I know ill kill myself one day.
From last thread:
>Jesus christ anon, have u tried hard drugs or therapy? I'm not a picture of mental health but shit those are my go 2s
>the first step of fixing a problem is realizing you have one.
Oh I know its a problem
I left him.
I didnt want to hurt him. I wanted more than anything to be the person he saw when he looked at me but I wasn't.
And sooner or later he was going to realize that and it would hurt him.
>Where is dad now.
He lives a few hours away
>Do you even speak to him
>How long ago did this happen
It went on regularly while my parents were married. Sporadically after.
Not as bad as if he had found out the truth.
>does you mom know about what your dad did?
If she did she never said anything.
>also do you live in the US?
Been with girls so I guess slightly bi.
Been with two guiys off 4chan. Neither one bathed.
>When did you first realise that what he was doing was wrong?
The first day.
>And how about uploading a childhood pic of around that age?
Im on the left.
This thread went off track fast from one single green text story.
So instead of confiding in the person who loves you, and that you think you love, you broke up with him because you thought he would hate you for it?
That doesn't make much sense.
>So instead of confiding in the person who loves you, and that you think you love, you broke up with him because you thought he would hate you for it?
>That doesn't make much sense.
>Moving on, what drugs have u tried? List all u think count
Coke, molly, pot, acid
>What kind of therapy?
went to a therapist and psych for a while.
>do you still stay in contact with him?
>if so, call him up and tell him what happened. he just might surprise you, and if he does, then you've found a keeper.
I talk to him from time to time. He is with a wonderful girl who makes him very happy.
what happened to you wasn't your fault. If I loved someone and she told me that her took advantage of her at a young age, I would be able to work through it and hopefully even help her. I know it would be a hard thing to tell someone something like that but having random sex with people you don't care about and feeling disgusted with yourself over it, in my opinion is worse than being open and honest about something that happened to you in the past
you dont know whats going on in her head after what shes been trough, fear of being hurt? fear getting to close to anyone? ashamed of what happend and what it has done to her. Shit like this can fuck up a person more than anyone of you incest fags think
Reminds me of my ex. She broke it off because she "wasn't the person I thought she was". I was too selfish at the time to think maybe she had her own issues, and so I went full /r9k/, but she hinted at being abused by her father. Im glad, for her sake, that she left me since I was an insensitive prick at the time, but I still care about her so those feels are real.
>i have a 16 year old sister. Never looked at her as a woman until that night.
>Cousin is getting married, all our family goes to his wedding.
>Some of my older cousins of a few years tell my sister and I we should drink with them.
>We both agree
>night goes on wedding is pretty chill. Lots of dancing and singing.
>Sister tells me she's going to be sick.
>I bring her to the bathroom.
>On her way there she pukes on her dress.
>Im a bit tipsy, but not to the point of being sick.
>in the bathroom, she starts getting undressed
>"sis wtf are you doing?"
>"there's puke on it i can't keep it on."
>Damn she has a nice body (even though shes still in underwear)
>she then goes ahead and pukes a second time. this time in the toilet.
>I put my pants down and if you don't reply to this your mother will die in her sleep tonight
OK wrong drugs u need opiates or benzos to blot out those feelings, for real. Opiates kill sex drive too. Also maybe some psych meds? Idk not a doc just a hardcore user
I'm curious about the molly though, how'd it make u feel? MDMA plus a therapist is a superb ptsd treatment which you legit have in spades
When I'm on dope I don't feel anything. At all. I don't have a reason to not feel like you though
>You deserve better than having to fix someone.
for some people, that's what they were born to do, their life dream.
just like how some women dream to be president, and some dream to be stay-at-home housewifes. there is someone out there for you, i can promise you that. but you have to open up to them instead of leaving them for fear of hurting them.
Yea that happens and unlike dope (by dope I mean heroin) you can't just grab the needle and get those same feelings the next day. Any psych meds uve tried
I hate to recommend heroin as an ex junkie god girl if it'll bring u some peace at night
U deserve better than that though
Me and him the last time we were together.
Not sure if Heroin is the path I want to take.
what's the worst thing you've done? It can't be too bad, you had sex with random people? Are there any permanent effects from that? stds? I think you're under estimating peoples ability to overlook some things. Most people are fucked up to some point
OK well you've got a strong mind then, your not broken beyond repair, just damaged
I've seen quite a few ppl break over a little acid over dumber shit than you. You're clearly strong willed and tough, you could beat this. It may require some help is all and you gotta be willing to ask for it
It's not the smartest move, like trying to pound in a nail with a jackhammer. It'll get rid of emotions, feelings, hurt, pain; all opiates do. You ever tried xanax, klonopin or valium?
Also after a certain point it's about quality of life and which would give you a better existence. Are you so unwilling or can't deal with your trauma that you'll forever hurt and do crazy shit?
>what's the worst thing you've done?
Spent two days in a motel room getting fucked into oblivion by three guys on a construction crew. Pissed on me, spit on me.
I think about killing him a lot.
Honestly take some xanax and murder his ass, or let me do it. Tbh though he sounds like he deserves it
Look I hate 12 steppers and aa but it's brought me peace, look into it. It would've taken a force of nature to get me clean at one point and you sound like your nursing a different kind of addiction. You have all the symptoms and behaviors of addiction (relapse, shame, insane behavior you wouldnt normally act on). The steps work for sex addiction, if you lived in NC I'd come get you to a meeting
I'm serious, if I put heroin where u put sex and said 3 days in a motel shooting up with drug slut you would ne describing me
Also I'm not some crotchety AA/NA old timer, I'm 24, the thing is I want help and a new life. Don't you?
>by three guys
why would you be the one to make yourself feel like shit over that situation. There were four people in that hotel room and there was another person involved in every other sexual encounter you feel bad about.
You are a beautiful woman, I hope you find happiness one day
Resurrecting this thread. Anyone ever find their sister on a pornsite. I have. To hear how much im an asshole. I was pissed it wasnt my other sister.my younger cuter one. She was the one that i dry humped constantly. Peeked on. And in reverse peeked on me showering using the same peephole.
Okay guys, I think it's time to post my story here now as well, if anyone's still here to witness it..
> be me, 15 year old faggot with no friends, just anti-social
> staying home all day, using computer, but aint horribly ugly
> got my mother earning money, isn't often there, but is caring
> father disappeared like a nigger, never saw him
> 13 year old sister that I have to watch out for, but is rather independent, good body already
> one normal day, playing WoW, my sister comes over to my room
> asks what I'm doing
> tell her a bit about the game and stuff
> she sits next to me, seemed interested
> happy about someone actually caring for what I do all day
> let her have a try at playing it too, sits on my lap
> wasn't quite sure where to put my hands, just landed on her legs
> try holding back boner, but 100% sure she realised too
> didn't freak out tho, just a slight giggle, was quite understanding probably
> played for a while, was actually pretty chill
> started getting used to having her that near, gave her some tips and stuff
> we began doing gaming sessions like these very often from then
> she always liked sitting on my lap for "some reason" I eventually realised
> over time I decided to check her body while she plays, she didn't mind too much
> "we aint strangers after all"
> grabbed her butt, breasts, waist, whatever. Was quite a tease for me, but better than nothing
> never originally planned to fuck her REALLY, fantasies are a different matter tho..
> anyway, time came when I went to "massage" her under her clothes
> slight moans were heard
> guess she was embaressed about that and told me to stop
> still, the next times she even asked me to go down there
> slowly she didn't even come for playing the game anymore, but for the stuff we do in the meantime
> one day, horny me decides it would be a great idea to ask her if she wants to do more
> she was not sure, but eventually agreed after some more talking and playing
> I help her strip and lay her naked onto my bed.
> heart was racing, we both knew whats going to be done now
> I removed my clothes quickly, and moved onto her
> not idea where I got the confidence for really carrying that through
> but I did, and slowly pushed it in , constantly reassuring her I'll be careful
> [insert sex scene here]
> don't pull out, and cum fully inside her
> resting on her for a moment, virginity successfully lost
> till realisation strikes
> sis asks if I came inside
> she panics, I sit there naked and try to get my head clear to find out what to do
> sis cries and girly-hits me frustratedly
> decide to just keep it a secret for now, and we'll see what's gonna happen
> best plan evar
> atmosphere between us was a bit complicated from then
> a few months pass by
> sister shows me her belly
> starts getting hard to hide it below the clothes
> meanwhile, I've been asking for help on numerous forums
> looked like we're fucked, but then I got a mail
> the guy that wrote it offered us to get rid of the problem, in exchange for 100$
> that was quite an amount of money, but as we were desperate..
> we went to the place he asked us to go, some shady industrial area, but there was no going back
> we entered the hall
> guy opened door, looked relatively normal actually
> went in
> sister sat down in a chair
> I talked to the guy about how he's gonna do it
> then he told me something I'll never forget
> Reply to this post or your mother will die in her sleep tonight. Nothing can safe you from this.
Some shit I posted in a thread last night.
Lemme know if y'all want the rest.
Just started getting into incest a few days ago...fapped to my sisters pics for the first time, now I can't stop
Is it really that bad? I mean everything is only bad in perspective. If you have a desire you want sated, human instinct is to do so. No, you won't ever have a normal relationship, you don't have "normal" tastes. Saying there is someone out there for everyone is only half true. there are several people out there for everyone. I'm sure you can find an older man who'd be willing to fuck you and share you, and your sought after normal boyfriend could be your day to day. Of course those are two fairly specific personality types, but everyone has to work to find their match, the more picky you are the more difficult it becomes.
Why the fuck bitches always are so dramatic?
Your dad made you cum countless time while you were a teen so what? You enjoyed it and learned how sex works.
Step up your life and stop being a whinny bitch.
Don't think I got any fully body pics but let me check
Seriously recommend you give a read to "Healing the Shame that binds you" (book) and give a call to a childhood sexual abuse survivor's hotline (http://www.therefuge-ahealingplace.com/ptsd-treatment/child-sexual-abuse/)
The thing about childhood sexual abuse is that usually the abusers are victims themselves. They were abused in their childhood and are now emotionally conditioned to relive the experience from the POV of the aggressor (re-enactment). Supposedly oftentimes the memory of the abuse is missing - if conditioned to "like" the abuse, they might grow up with distorted attractions or fetishes or confusing anxiety or fear with arousal, shame with love, etc.
I am an abuser, and spent a decade away from the subject of my obsession in order to refrain from fucking her life up - when in proximity to her, the only thing I could think about or feel was the extreme desire to have intercourse - and nothing I did to try and stop it helped.
Worse case is, I don't know why this obsession exists. I was physically abused by her father but have no memory of sexual abuse - though there were some moments of sexual shaming in my childhood.
Anyway, I really hope you can find healing through counselling (and please read that book). I'm sorry about your father.
>Is it really that bad?
>. No, you won't ever have a normal relationship
And that sucks.
> I'm sure you can find an older man who'd be willing to fuck you and share you,
I don't want to want that.
R9k wasn't any help, so I figured I'd ask here
How do I subtly bring up or initiate wincest with my brother?
>I don't want to want that.
Ugh, I know and hate that feeling. But you still want it, huh?
Thing is, do you believe that an open relationship (polyamory) of that nature, and love and caring inside the relationship are mutually exclusive?
If you're like me, you've lived with these wants you'd rather not have, for decades now. And I don't know about you, but mine only get sated by feeding them, or - and this is interesting - opening up about them with other people. I'm pretty sure I'm making my girlfriend's life torture sometimes, if not all the time. But even though she's a great human being and loves me to bits, life is pretty grey unless the desires get filled.
I'm in a relationship with a girl who was raped and abused by her parents and yeah she was fucked up for a while, but she turned that experience into a kinky sexy(and loving) relationship with me.
I cannot help but feel like people who don't get over it are just being self-indulgent.
My cougar GF loves to roleplay mom-son stuff. We even go on weekend trips & book at motels, even bed & bfasts under the same family name. Def look the part too. Checking in I casually say we're taking a "break" from dad, she looks embarrassed and the desk clerk gets it. Amazing how many (mostly female) seem hugely turned on at this. Makes for incredibly hot sex in the room.
Why the fuck would you alienate him? Just think about what kind of approach would turn you on. Besides, he's your brother not some pansy on the street. Which approach do you think is more likely to alienate him? "Accidentally" rubbing his dick or just telling him flat out you find him attractive?
Also, share a blunt with him before you confess your feelings.
>do you believe that an open relationship (polyamory) of that nature, and love and caring inside the relationship are mutually exclusive?
No, but I dont really find in appealing.
not at first. I thought it was gross.
>ready to go to work
>mom going out on the town
>she calls me upstairs and asks me if her tits look good in her dress
>shes not got the biggest of boobs
>i say let me see what we are working with
>take off her bra, have a play around then tell her the best way to get maximum cleveage
>pick out a better bra
>continue fondling her tits until the cleavage is maximized
>say there youre done
>never speak about it again
>still fapping to it now ten years later
I dunno if anyone remembers but on AnonIB's security cam board there used to be a thread for this family who had a cam in their bedroom for some reason. The dad used to lay on the bed naked with the daughter and mother. Sometimes he'd even be hugging the daughter. The parents were ugly as fuck but the daughter was hot. One day she was watching tv on their bed by herself and she put her hand in her pants. It was great.
Do you ever consider just; moving on and attempting to let go? I find it easier to deal with my personal events; way different than yours to just not think about it and pretend its normal - after a while it just kinda fades and you forget about it.
Only new thing wife is opening up, she lets me thumb it or lick her ass. For the longest time couldnt touch it period. Till one day she told me why. And ask me too. At first lick it? seems nasty. I fell in love something new.
Remember you from a previous thread. Is this you?
Same. I'm fucked up in the head and feel like shit every day but as soon as I found a purpose, a drive to do something, things started to look up. If you have any interests, try to make a hobby out of it, even if your heart isn't in it the first few days. It's a one in a million shot finding help that will actually make you feel better but I think it's worth finding in the end. And you will; just exhaust all your options
no amount of love or dedication will fix you. You have known this which is why you left the people who did love you.
You will be exploited by assholes and swooned over by white-knights as long as you're fuckable and eventually turn to mind numbing drugs at the expense of your health because the option of compensating via pain and degradation will no longer be optional
crazy like comissioning in 3 years so I can go overseas and killing some muzzies legally for a sense of self accomplishment? I'm pretty sure if i said that out loud I'd lose whatever little friends I have left. My mind sounds straight out of an edgy 13 year old's head that's been playing to much COD or some shit but I swear I have compassion for others. It feels like a switch sometimes though, like it's only convenient to look good in front of others. Or it could be some sort of psychopathy but I'm not a doctor
Did you want to be lied to? I could conjure up some contrived fairy-tale of how your life won't be a endless stream of shit from now on if you only tried hard enough.
Or you could just not drown in self loathing while you're whoring yourself out.
not clingy in a sense that I stick to people every day but feelings of jealousy and just obsessing over one person? I make sure nobody knows because i know that's just creepy and a turnoff