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Storytime /b/ >Be me, 20 year old, from an economically depressed

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 156
Thread images: 27

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Storytime /b/

>Be me, 20 year old, from an economically depressed area but middle-middle class fam.
>Going to uni and working two jobs
>Lose hours at one job.
>Rent's due. $500 in bank becomes $240
>Groceries and gas for the week, becomes $170
>Telling my friend I'm strapped for cash, as my second job is 7.5 hours a week if I don't pick up shifts.
>He tells me he covered his tuition driving cars for this anon. He'll introduce me.

Week passes by, decided to get drinks with a girl, and eat the on campus food a couple times, topped off gas, down to $145.

>Friend calls me and tells me to be at McDonalds in a nearby city in one hour.
>Get to McDonalds and park, meet friend and start walking to anon's spot.
>Friend telling me he put in a good word and I should have a job lined up.
>Get to spot, it's the back room of a laundromat where this giant anon is cutting lines of coke on a mirror.
>"Listen, Friend here tells me you're an honest guy and you're hit hard for cash. That you can drive with a cool head and have no arrest record. I have this car I need you to drive North. and there are three fucking conditions your life depends on at this point. You do not look in the trunk. This is so you can drive without shitting yourself on the weight you're sitting on. You listen to the radio quietly and drive like the sensible white boy you are, and you do not lose the vehicle. Get the vehicle to this address and I'll come through with $12,000 in bearer's bonds."
>mfw $12,000, that's tuition, rent, Jim Bean, piff, and eating out for months for a day's work.
>Friend of mine is driving a follow car, no drugs but will distract any police that pull me over.
>Anon says, "First thing's last, give me your cell phone, and wallet" He places them in a brown manila envelope, and hands me a gun.

...Continue? Typing now.
>>
Go on
>>
Time stamp of gun?
>>
bump for interest
>>
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Gay
>>
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>Get to the whip, for Anon's sake leaving out the make and model, but it's recently been detailed as there's not a bit of dust inside.
>I tuck the gun under my seat and check the prepaid phone I was given.
>text from friend, "This is not shit you wanna be doing all day, go."
>I start the car and make my way to the highway.
>A mile out the gate I make a wrong turn and get stuck on some stupid one-way st.
>Roll by a State cop. Make eye contact.
>Turn up the radio on some raggaeton.
>Roll right past without breaking contact.
>Friend laughing in follow car. Pulls out phone.
>Cop turns on the cop lights and stops my friend.
>Shit, shit, without him there's nothing keeping me from getting my shit searched if I'm stopped on the highway.
>>
continue faggot
>>
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go on
>>
>kay?
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>>607196786
I laughed harder than I should have.
>>
>Get on highway anyways, starting to panic.
>Remembering what that Anon said, that's what my buddy was there for. His car must be clean and he's probs getting cited for being on his cell.
>Find the Highway
>Bohemian Rhapsody comes on when I change the station. I change it again.
>A nice, mellow techno beat's on the next station, I bump it and start to drive 65 going North, still shaking.
>"HEROIN OVERDOSES ON THE RISE FOR THE THIRD CONSECUTIVE YEAR..." Flip the station. Fucking NPR.
>forty five miles to go and I've made my fortune.


OP will delivers.
>>
>Jim Bean
>Bean

As a man who works in a liquor store this drive me nuts.
>>
Imb4 ops diriving 100 lbs of heroin
>>
oh shit oh shit
>>
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>>607197134
Go on
>>
ops taking a while
>>
Why does no one pretype?
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>>607198413
Because OP is a faggot
>>
>>607195012
Op is a faggot
>>
Maybe he's typing while he drives.
>>
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>>
OP Here

>I cross state borders not having gotten word back from my friend in the other car.
>debating taking the battery out of the stupid phone.
>Just past the border sits three State Cop Cars, one from my State, two from the Northern one. The one from my State is a K-9 SUV.
>I see lights
>Shit, I'm not expected to shoot fucking up to six cops over this vehicle, am I?
>Nobody is this unlucky, my driving is perfect, I'm dressed like some average schmuck, in an average schmuck car running some whatever errand.
>Two of the Cruisers get behind this white carrier van that's been behind me.
>I hear something like backfire and a crash all in one.
>Motherfuckers from the van just shot at one of the Cops.
>I drive 80MPH all way to my exit.
>Wasn't supposed to write location down but read the address from my sweaty palms.
>There's a Hispanic guy waiting for me at a normal looking house waving me to get into the garage.
...To be OPtinued.
>>
>>607198413
Cause they're faggots that are gonna walk the dinosaur, spill their spaghetti, fresh Prince... I hate /b/
>>
>>607198571
Live feed updates
>>
oh no ops getting whacked.
>>
Hurry up God dammit
>>
>>607198658
More man, common!
>>
OP HERE
>I go in the garage and the this mexican guy shoots me and I die
>I die
>>
This is stupid as shit. Why would they give you a gun? Also, insanely rare to get stopped by the police, almost no risk if you're trying to avoid it. Also, even more rare to have your vehicle searched.

In over a decade of driving I've been stopped three times, for speeding (not searched), for having expired registration - it was more than a year expired (not searched) and at a DUI checkpoint (not searched). The odds of things going wrong are 1 in a million - so, no, nobody is paying you 12k for that.
>>
>>607199408

but who was phone?
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>>607199099
mispelled raped
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>>607199408
*very really op*/10
>>
>>607199588
My father
>>
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yeah maybe if ur carrying some good luggage they will pay a pretty penny
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>Hispanic guy closes up garage door.
>Signals I turn off the radio
>mfw still listening to Katy Perry to mellow out.
>"You look like you just saw a ghost, essay. What happened to your friend?"
>"I, uh, we lost each other, he got pulled over on a traffic violation on the way here."
>"Look, I'm not supposed to let you go unless your friend is here, so why don't you face that wall and put your hands behind your head."
>He has a gun to my back and pats me down.
>Speech Options [Ok] [Let me explain] [Let me go (10%]
>"You got anon's shit, let me go."
>I see a blinding light that I realize is me getting the piss pistol whipped out of me.
>>
>>607200137
Continue
>>
>>607200137
Waiting
>>
the friend shows up drops to the floor and everybody walks the dinosaur
>>
>>607200826
Masturbating
>>
>>607200916
Inb4 dinosaur
>>
inb4 belair
>>
>He begins putting his fingers in my tight bungle hole
>I whisper "Oi you a faggot?"
>He whips out his cocks
>He sticks one in my bum and rubs the other on my crack
>I moan a little as he starts rubbing salad cream on my nipples
>I precum in his mothers ashes
>>
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>>607201242
>salad cream
>>
>I said the fucking dealer's name to this guy
>He's cussing at me in Spanish, kicks me.
>Largely unprofessional behavior on both sides.
>Wait
>Decide to tell him about carrier van on the highway
>"Bullshit" says the hispanic guy
>"You don't have a police scanner?"
>He pops the trunk and procures one.
> All sorta shit about an officer in need of assistance, ambulances needed
>"Listen man" Goes Hispanic guy, "I don't know if you fucked up, but somebody caught on to our cars today and you almost got killed over this shit. That van was gonna pull you over and put two in your dome."
>The last little bit of piss I have left from being kicked I let out.
>"I have to call my friend and see if he's-"
>Hispanic guy reaches into car and snaps the burner in half, takes the battery out.
>Promised my shit back ASAP, given $200 cash and bus route.
>Here I am in another state, no possessions but cash, walking away from a sketchy car, sketchy house and I hear sirens.
>>
hurry faggot
>>
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I am going to be so mildly perturbed when this ends stupidly.
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>van driver
>>
HURRY THE FUCK UP OP
>>
fucking learn to pretype fuck
>>
In b4 donosaure
>>
We all know this will end in dino/belair nonsense but yet we all wait for the inevitable disappointment
>>
>He whispers in my ear "Meet me in the nearest bus stop"
>I take the $200 from his spicy buns and put it in my Dora the Necrophia wallet
>I head to the nearest bus stop and before you could say "I dont like it when hispanic dudes start touching my small penis" I saw a familiar naked hispanic dude running towards me
>I grab is flapping dick and start to tug on it
>As the bus stops I grab his dick and pull him on the bus
>I give my wallet to the bus driver and start dry humping the hispanic dude on a child
>The bus starts moving and I start milking his nipples
>>
inb4 OP an hero
>>
>story has no ending
>>
>I'm walking down the st. it's gotten colder and my ears are ringing. mfw I have a black eye from that pointless beatdown
>My homeboy rolls through in his personal car.
>Listening to 10 Crack Commandments by Biggie
>"Yo, anon, hop in quick, it's time to get the fuck out of here." He could have actually said anything, but this is what I heard.
>He tells me things got fucked up with the police, the car's registration wasn't legit or in his name and it was impounded. He's still got his cell phone with big anon's number. We call it.
>My friend's explaining our situation for two seconds when I hear screaming, put me the fuck on the phone.
>I tell him the carrier van story
>He calls me a fucking badass idiot
>That's what your friend thought of me too, I tell him. Learned a couple new slurs in Spanish and got a black eye.
> "You mean to tell me my six foot four Rasta Friend (Anon) learned to speak Spanish overnight?"
>Lose a little more piss.
>>
>>607203323
-The Real OP

-OP
>>
he's posting this as it happens. that's why it's taking so long
>>
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>>607203323
Please type fast
>>
>>607203471
no

no he's not, don't lie to me like that
>>
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op's face
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>>607203992
Fucking bump
>>
>My friend notices that I have ejaculated in my pants
>I look over and he is masturbating furiously
>I tell him to sit on my fist
>He pulls everything down and he slides himself down my arm
>We hit a couple of people while doing this but there are no dents
>We see a big black dude in the cross walk
>We decide to hit him but we crash in a wall
>He pulls out a gun and shoots me and some others
>He chases me in a pawn shop and I see a guy looking at us
>He pulls out a shotgun and starts telling us to get down
>A gimp then appears and starts spinning small babies on his dick
>>
I hope you don't die in your story OP :(
>>
>Phone conversation goes downhill
Essentially:
>Homeboy was murdered I was supposed to get the car to
>Gave up the whip willingly to the guy who did it
> Was only keeping me alive until my friend arrived, turned me loose probably because the heat was on.
>Have to hang up. The cops are pulling down the st to the house I was in.
>Friend and I get the fuck out of dodge
>Go home
>Wait on information from anybody
>At work the next day, coworker comes up from behind me, I scream like babby
>Checking smartphone constantly for news on the shit they must have found in that house.

And here I am. Waiting on whether or not I'm getting paid or whether I'm a dead man. What do, /b/?
>>
>>607204503
well you're definitely not going to get paid
>>
>>607204503
Get as much baking soda you can and hope that the boss will accept it for your fuckup
>>
>>607204503
Kill yourself so you don't get murdered
>>
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That is a bummer
>>
>>607204503
Only one thing to do, OP. An hero.
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>>607204503
Move to straya m8
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>>607197598
Probably just a typo
Get the bottle of Jim Bean out of your ass
>>
>>607197598
drives** as an English teacher this drive
>>
OP what state do u live in?
>>
Sell the story rights to Hollywood
>>
>>607204503
Pussy. Go get your Fucking money. From the story, you get paid on the vehicle getting there. Doesn't matter if his friend got killed. You did your job. Tell your faggot friend for the guy to uphold his end of the deal or call the cops and say you delivered the vehicle under duress.
>>
>>607205404
the 404 is right
>>
>> .. walk the dinosaur
>>
>>607205378
Not tryina let that information loose.

OP here on an update. I got a facebook message a few hours ago from somebody I don't know with gmail login credentials as the first message and a second telling me to change the password. Should I open it? Could it be a Fed trap or something?
>>
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>>607195012
wew lad is 4chan's newest meme.

>when you hear a good song
wew lad

>after an epic drum solo
wew lad

>when you meet a qt
wew lad

>your favourite band announces a new album
wew lad



                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       

  



  



  

     


  
                       









       


    
  
  
  
  
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>>607205566
Fucking dubdoubles confirms op needs to handles his shit
Your life of crime has only just begun
>>
>>607205678
R u midwest?>>607205678
>>
>>607205687
>Mom come quick! I posted it again!
>>
>>607205678
Open it a library and wear a ball cap and jacket there for cameras sake, keep your head down and get there and back on a bike
>>
>>607205678
if the feds knew your part in this they'd just come talk to you

I'd be more worried about getting shot in a "random" mugging
>>
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>>607204503
Big Anon might've set you up. He didn't fucking think to tell you who you'd be dropping off to? And you didn't fucking think to ask?

In any case, something's fishy.
>>
>>607203323
>Turns out i drove into the wrong house
>The sweat from my hands ruined the location on my hand
>Guy on phone is pissed and cussing at me apparently i just dropped off the car at a rival gangs house
>Friend goes oh shit but we see a line of cop cars come in from the distance
>Decide its best to just get out of there for now as cops are heading right for spanish dudes house
>As we drive off we hear gunshots in the distance or at least i think i do i was still pretty shaken
>Finally make it across the state line and back home with a black eye and 200 in cash
>I never got paid the 120000 but since all that shit went down my friend loans me the next months rent and we agree never to talk about it again
>I was able to convince my boss to give me more hours since the upcoming month was busier and we had a worker quit
>About a month later i was just sitting at home chilling with my friend when i hear a loud knock on the door theres some yelling and someone sounds pissed
>I slowly get up from the couch while my friend is freaking out and shout who is it of course no answer
>So i go up to the door and look out no one is there but theres a package
>I decide to say screw it and just turn off all the lights and go to bed for the night i dont want another black eye or an angry spanish gang member
>In the morning i wake up and decide its time to see what it is i go to open the door but as i do i make sure to stay low
>So low that i get on the floor
>Everybody walk the dinosaur
>>
>>607205687
is wew lad the new milhouse and as such, not a meme?
>>
>>607206228
Thats why you read the end first kids
>>
>>607206380
That's not op
>>
>>607206228
Actual OP here, nice fanfiction.

I opened up the gmail account and there's just one message besides the generic ones from Google. I'm afraid it's got some sort of executable in it, but screencapping now one minute.
>>
>>607206380
theres a reason there were id's.
>>
>>607206528
Oh i know mane, i read the end first
>>
>>607206563
Give us the credentials
Holy fuuuuck
>>
Lurking bump
>>
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>>607195012
Waiting on your cue.
>>
>>607206228
Nice try, nigger. You should really use the auto update feature. And type faster than a fingerless Downs kid.
>>
>>607206563
Hurry up or I leave without giving you any more advice.
>>
>>607206563
Screencapping taking this long
>>
>>607207182
Allright, allright, sorry I was having some trouble getting screencap to work on this shitty old Android phone i use for wifi. Dealer man still has my real phone.
The message reads:

>Listen,

>You did fuck up a few things on that job. But I hope you learned how to handle it when shit goes wrong.

>Come by where we met tomorrow at 1:00. Don't be late.
>>
Gov'nmt took his got-daym computer!
>>
>>607207507
Dude bring a fucking gun is all i can say
>>
Don't do it op! It's a setup
>>
>>607207507
You seem more stretchy than your fictitious dealer guy. I'm going to bed. If real story, play it safe, don't get killed.
>>
>>607207507
nigga u lyin
>>
>>607207637
Yeah, middle-middle class, remember? I intend to get a fucking dope computer if I get paid tomorrow and don't get a bullet in my dome over this shit. I have a feeling that it's dangerous to go, but probably more so not to go. What do? Should I go in legit and unarmed, or lawyer up and get a SWAT team, or fucking run and hide?
>>
>>607207507
Take your mom with you and use her as a shield
>>
Run away and join the circus. I kid you not. Travel, work and live on the road. Less overhead, pay in your pocket and more of a future. Hit the road. Hobo if you have to! Fuck rent!
>>
>>607207507
Somebody been playing too much GTA.
>>
>>607207999
You figure these guys are packing anti-tank weaponry, or just want to be absolutely sure?
>>
>>607207992
Im high as fuck and this is a great story op
>>
>>607207992
Lawyer up, the guy talking about duress might have a point. Or bring your buddy and a gun. Looks like the thug life chose you op
>>
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>>607207507
Your best bet is to go. You'll might get murdered, but the fact that you didn't intentionally tried to fuck over Big Anon means you probably won't get tortured or have your family murdered.

But if you don't get murdered, you're in with this crew for a looooong time.
>>
>>607208205
Nah Its probably just gunna be some goon and the main dude somewhere else
>>
>>607208421
You completely missed the joke.
>>
>>607208355
>>607207992
Listen, I said call the police if you don't think you'll get killed. It's not worth the hassle. Just tell the police that you were forced into this job and now feel like your life is endangered from the guy. Duress is a real thing that can be proven by police and they will protect you if you can convince them you are threatened. If he still had your phone, they can track it as well, finding the guy.
>>
>>607208728
man Im high and ive been awake since monday I dont even know what a panini is anymore
>>
>>607207992
You faggot
Your fucking prints were all over that god damn car pressing the buttons and shit
Your hair is stuck on the driver seat
Your blood is most likely at the crime scene
Your shit is going to get traced back to that guy
Or you
Thise guys ever see you again
Youre a dead man op
Better get a gun and get that cash and go change your fucking name
>>
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>>607208359
Not really sure I'm trying to do sketchy driving gigs like this again. I'm literally shaking and my roommates think my dog died.

>Get home from work, go to ice eye
>Roomates ask me what's wrong, i look like shit, etc
>Tell them, "My dog died. I have to go to bed.
>They offer to smoke me up, get me liquor, beer, etc. I take the ganja and shut them out.
>>
>>607207507
Don't do it op
Its a tarp
>>
Good luck op

>but next time you need cash just suck a dick
>>
>>607209249
It's this even op?
I'm so confused
>>
>>607208845
>they will protect you

They will do their best, which is shitty, and only until they get a conviction. Witness protection is shit.
>>
>>607209249
Your roommates -- that's the people you live with -- don't know whether you have a dog or not?
>>
>>607209889
Nobody in the witness protection program has ever been found by the mobs looking for them.
>>
>>607210208
How can you even attest to that?
>>
>>607195012
april fools niggers
>>
>>607209856
Yup it's me. I'm at home now and barricading myself in on 4chan.

I just received a call through my roomie's cell from my friend's phone.

>He said, "usually by now I'm contacted on where and when to get the money. Have you ever traded by dead drop? It's where the shit you need is left for you, and you make sure you're to pick it up."

>I didn't tell my friend I have a face-to-face meeting with anon tomorrow. Who knows who could be listening in on that conversation.
>>
>>607210208
Are you retarded?
>>
>>607210208
Holy fuq
A trained professional
>>
>>607210460
Get your friend over and tell him about the meeting, OP! Tell him to come over
>>
>>607210123
OP Here: I'm 20 and live at an apartment with kids near college. My dog is back at home, hopefully alive and well. I just needed something without follow-up questions to tell my people in case they noticed me sketching out.
>>
>>607210460
Ok just making sure
Just tell him to UPS it to you
>>
>>607210460
You're dead kiddo.
>>
>>607196298
CONTINUITY ERROR.
He took your phone and put it in an envelope.
>>
>>607210751
You never screenshitted and never gave us credentials to verify email
>>
>>607211028
An error in writing, he gave me a piece and a burner to keep in touch with my homie in the follow car. That way, my friend can tag along a ways back and I call him if I'm in trouble. My personal phone never went anywhere near the whip, I assume it's still disassembled in this guy's laundromat somewhere or in the garbage.
>>
So, do I go or not? I'm definitely not sleeping after this shit. I haven't slept since I got whipped, and want to put this behind me with a fat steak dinner and a lack of danger for my fam.
>>
Nigga, sounds like you in some deep shit.
This is why you don't do sketchy shit.
>>
>>607204503
Real talk dude, run
>>
>>607212088
Personally, I'm sure you'll be fine if you go. If Big Anon has been in the game long enough, he won't wanna catch a body (yours) over this shit. Just go, be HONEST and confident that you did your best without any scandalous intent. If you go all clammy and paranoid, Big Anon will start to question your heart.
>>
/b/ there's one piece of the thread I've been leaving out. The cash the Hispanic guy gave me was all marked identically. Maybe it's codified from DEA or something I don't know. Can y'all check it out?
>>
>>607213317
Nice!
>>
File: 1427611754726.jpg (7KB, 250x250px) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
1427611754726.jpg
7KB, 250x250px
>>607213317
you fucking idiot, you were exactly 20 seconds too soon.
>>
>>607213317

FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
>>
>>607213317
Hope you do die now. Wasted my time giving advice.
>>
>>607213863
I'm just having a fuck with you all on that. really though I'm going to walk to the store, get some cigs and mull this over. I will deliver with the bearer's bonds tomorrow as a tru April Fools prank if I go and get paid.
>>
>>607213317
>>
>>607214094
Yeah, bearer bonds really haven't been a thing for about 40 years. This ain't Die Hard, beeatch.
>>
I enjoyed the story. Anybody who actually believed it is pretty gullible though.
>>
>>607214217
>what are time zones
are you retarded?
>>
>>607214217
lrn to timezone anon. It's 2.07 where I'm at.
And I was just being festive with that post anyways, I intend to get paid for this fiasco.
>>
>>607214458
this is clearly west coast
>>
>>607214729
OP here, East Coast for life, all ten hours of it.
>>
>>607214458
It's actually 2017 where I am. We got the iPhone 7 here in Europe.
Thread posts: 156
Thread images: 27



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