Funniest thing happened to me last week
>Over at my friend's house for a party (Yes, OP is a girl. My tits are my own so fuck off)
>People are drunk as fuck including my friend
>everyone has either crashed, is playing mario cart, or is going home
>no one is really doing anything so I start gather my shit and leave
>Then some fucking hot 10/10 guy showed up
>"hey, did I miss the party? (Insert my friend's name here)."
>"eh? No 10/10, itsh shtill gblublbla." -My friend
>"Don't listen to her, she's drunk off her ass." I told em
>"oh well, I don't know if I should stay too long. I got a curfew"
>"Okay well, if you want you can- insert boring conversation that lasts for a few minutes
>Really it was just like me talking about my favorite kinds of anime while he listened
>"great, well Femanon. I think I should get going. Unless you want to do something..?"
>eep!.avi
>Together we go upstairs
>our clothes get shreded off
>No time at all I'm naked
>there was something wrong though
>He didn't take off his pants yet
>"eeeh, is everything okay?"
>Fuck please don't be a weirdo
>"lol I'm a little bit nervous."
>omg I thought that was cute
>"Oh, do you want me to help you?"
>"Rip em off of me please." he smiles
>erotically as I could I pulled his pants off
>Vagina?.png
>every part of my being was used to contain my laughter
>"Ready?" he told me
>"Yeah um I don't do girls."
>"Bitch what?"
>Oh, no pussy for you
>"deal with it."
>"You want me to give you something to deal with?
>what.jpg
>"Asshole, you're not getting anything."
>"Like I give a shit, you're not even hot."
>"k bye."
>then I started to put my clothes on
>He fucking towers over me
>"Ey where do you think you're going?"
>"Don't touch me."
>"I'll do whatever the fuck I want bitch."
>nope.avi
>"Oh no you won't."
>"Says who? Cunt."
>"an alcohol."
>"Ur fucking kidding me right?"
>"REALLY? A DOUBLE CONUNDRUM?" "FUCK YOU OP YOU FUCKING FAGGOT!"
Mfw first letter of every sentence.
Fuck yes.
>>588492590
Pasta
>>588493383
Not pasta, just wrote it.
Tl;dr
Op is faggot and won't show tits, this is now a Spiderman thread.
>>588492590
That's nice but I'm not seeing time stamped tits
>>588492590
Tîts or gtfo
>>588492590
Faaaaggggg
>>588493693
>>588492590
Tits or gtfo or pee for /b/ slut
Bump. Best story ever.
>>588492590
>Yes, OP is a girl. My tits are my own so fuck off
sage
tl;dr
Stopped reading at
>(Yes, OP is a girl. My tits are my own so fuck off)
you know the rules
>>588492590
Your tits are not your own when your on /b/....now tits or GTFO...it is really simple
>>588494812
why does OP have to tell that OP is a of the female variety? because attention that's why. just the thought that it might actually be a female on the other end of the keyboard gets you cunts riled so much. take the pussy off the pedestal boys, we got assholes that feel like vaginas too. yee
>INb4
READ THE FIRST LETTER OF EVERY SENTENCE.
FOR FUCKS SAKE I HONEY COCKED YOU. I'm not a girl and I'm not a trap.
These sadkunts posting about rules and shit while not even fucking reading through OP. Idiots the lot of them, fuck me...
>>588495559
can i see your b0ypussy?
lame
Tits or gtfo. ...you know the rules femanon.
>>588496285
show me your dick to prove you're not a fat beta fuck.
That was the point of saying I'm a girl. To reel you into the story...
Hmm
Next time I will have to be more careful.
ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴏʀ ɢᴇᴛ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ғʟᴏᴏʀ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏʙᴏᴅʏ ᴡᴀʟᴋ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪɴᴏsᴀᴜʀ
>>588492590
Tits or GTFO you stupid cumdumpster
Christ, now people know that I'm a guy and are just trolling.