sup /b ask someone with schizophrenia anything. a little background >just turned 20 >stopped medication because we moved out of province >been dealing with delusions and psychotic thoughts for 3 months now without telling anyone
if you're at all interested ask me some questions and i will answer them fully
>>580721621 hmm. i wouldnt know >>580721654 i prefer 8 >>580721665 i have actually. i think that 4th dimensional beings are contacting me through the use of people around me, the radio, television and movies. i listen in to peoples conversations to try and make out what they are saying and shit.
>>580721927 >i think that 4th dimensional beings are contacting me through the use of people around me
Listen to yourself mate. Consider how easily this could get out of hand.
If aliens are trying to talk to you or not: fuck them. If they don't want to send you an email in English then let them go fuck themselves. Don't push yourself off the deep end trying to figure their bullshit out just because they're lazy, and maybe non existent.
>>580721741 i actually dont hear voices at all, and im glad i dont. >>580721815 before my diagnosis i thought i was hitlers reincarnation, then jesus, and thought everyone was my children for some reason i also thought everyone was plotting against me to have sex with me. >>580721909 well, honestly it came out of the blue about a year ago. again i thought i was the reincarnation of hitler among other things and it was very disturbing thinking back on it >>580721914 used to smoke weed quit on doctors order, not immediately of course. i sued to think that life was a virtual reality game that i had to progress through and that i could survive off drugs >>580722085 nope sorry >>580722192 i've thought about killing people ass soon as i met them. and many times after the fact for no apparent reason.>>580722335 i wouldnt make this shit up
Despite what everyone is saying you should try listening to what the voices are saying, your subconscious might be trying to tell you something. People who aren't schizoprenic usually their body tries to communicate with then via dreams but people just dismiss it as a bad dream or something.
You should try listening but don't do any action before actually rationalizing what you hear.
>>580722345 Aphex twin, rise against. havent really been into music lately. >>580722362 actually i thought at one point when i was watching a show on reptilian shapeshifters that i was one and that earth was "mine" and that by signing up for a google account and adding everyone i wanted saved from the apocalypse to go on a ship with me to outer space. totally fucked. >>580722449 dude, i liked it better when i had the really fucked up thoughts and now that i know it isnt real i feel shitty and depressed.
>>580722892 now that i know its not real i can control it for the most part. not the thoughts but my judgements on them so i dont go around telling people im going on a spaceship in a week or so like i did before.
>>580723248 I dont really have friends just family and they know i have it. Brothers dont really believe it although i havent told anyone 1/4 of the shit i used to/do think. >>580723253 I know man. but im not afraid of me hurting anyone or myself i just have fucked up thoughts sometimes.okay most of the time.
I'm in the early stages of schizophrenia, 21 years old. Getting harder and harder to relate to the outside world. It's like im descending into madness. But im still self aware, it sucks knowing that one day I'll wake up and be totally mental. Worst part is I did it to myself by abusing drugs since I was 15.
>>580723047 >>580722892 True, I've been a schizo off meds since I was 14, diagnosed at 5. Its all about self control really, and I smoke a lot of weed. It keeps me from hurting others while not making me pass out for hours at a time. Udually lasts longer too.
Okay, so I'm not sure if I am schizophrenic or not (Could just be my ADHD), so I want to know... do you hear voices?
Seriously, this isn't some fucktard of a question. I constantly hear voices. Men's, women's, children's, demonic-sounding, other languages... I constantly hear them like I'm surfing a CB radio and I can't shut it off.
Sometimes they ask me about things going on in my life. Sometimes I get advice. Sometimes they push and prod me for bad things. Sometimes it's like I'm hearing a conversation between "others" and I'm eavesdropping in on it.
Sometimes it cuts in and out like a tunnel. I'll literally hear static and a dial tone, followed by that hard "Shhzzz-CLWHMP" when you plug a microphone into a speaker while it's on. When that happens, I "feel" this pain in my ears that runs down my spine and I involuntarily cock my head to the side hard enough to crack my neck.
I have no idea if my ADHD is super bad and I'm going full retard, or if I'm actually schizo. Sometimes I see shadows in the corners of my eyes, too.
I don't want to get tested because what good is that going to do? List in a file somewhere that I'm fucked up? Get medication that may or may not help? It hasn't caused any damage so far, so there isn't really a problem... right?
>>580723619 smoked weed when i was 11, started steady at like 13 up until my diagnosis. >>580723623 I actually get really sketched out when i smoke weed now have panic attacks and think im going to die of a heart attack.
>>580723304 when i was in psychosis i tought god was setting me up to be king of the new world and that he transforms to specific people which i randomly meet on the streets to teach me lessons and give me money, this was like for one week then i went full psychosis and got locked up in psych ward. have you ever been to a psych ward op ?
>>580723737 I actually havent heard voices at all, its different for everyone but hearing voices is very common. I used to think i could tune into radio with my mind but only when it was on lmfao i would lip sync all the words wit surprising accuracy and would even do it in french.
>>580723795 I was working doing drywall and had an infatuation with my roomate which was 9 years older than me. she seemed into me and shit so i would ask if she wanted to fuck and shit like that. she would always say no and that i was just a friend, i believe the rejection was what triggered it and thats when i thought i was jesus. i layed in my room for 3 days straight masturbating (not leaving to eat shit or piss) thinking i was telepathically having sex with her then i got the bright idea to walk back to see my family in a town 3 hours drive away. i got a couple blocks away and realize i forgot my skateboard so i ran back to get it and theres this damn train, thinking its stopping for me specifically i climb over it and get my board. this is going to be a long story bro got some time? >>580723821 yeah my story will explain it. >>580723973 i also have thoughts of people trying to sabatoge me for no reason at all.
>>580724575 anyways, my boss ends up picking me up says hes worried about me and asks me about all my stuff left at the house and that i was getting kicked out, said i dont need it thinking i was god or jesus or something, so he says he can only take me halfway to my family's.I insist that ill waslk (reminder i havent eaten or drank anything for 3 days) anyways i start walking and after awhile i get the bright idea that the sun gives me energy, so i proceed to stare at it thinking its charging me up. i end up exhausted at the end of my rope and think to myself i need water. i go to a stream of melting snow and drink some water.i end up giving up my walk praying for someone to come get me. out of the blue my moms ex with my brother and sister show up and bring me to get some food then bring me to the town my family lived in.
>>580725162 while i was there, i thought that i was controlling people with my mind watching youtube videos of top gear with fast cars with mods thinking they/re talking about me and that i was some sort of experimental being with these super powers of some sort. i stay there for a couple days thinking life was a simulated game and that games were controlling things in real life. like GTA and COD, i would play jetpackjoyride thinking the coins i collected were actually adding up in an imaginary bank that i could gain access to somehow. my mom was currently at her boyfriends at another town and they came and picked me up after awhile.
>>580725627 i went there and things got even more fucked up. for some reason i think my moms boyfriends house was actually my house with all the things there set up for me. i thought everyone in the town knew about me and my greatness except my family and my moms boyfriend and that i had to keep things on the down low to them. at this point i still thought life was some sort of game to play and i collected coins thinking they were adding up into the bank account of which i had no access yet. my moms boyfriend at the time kept talking about his dad who was just getting into a home thinking that they were talking about me going back to my new home in vienna. remember i thought i was hitler. we end up going to check out his place in another town and i was thinking all the way there that i would somehow end up in my mansion in vienna if i did the right sequence of things to get there. we go inside and i inspect the place for light switches and knobs to turn to transport myself there to no avail. the place seemed unreal like somehow i was manifesting it on my way through. we end up leaving and going to kfc, and i waited in the truck. i was pushing buttons on the stereo and turning knobs to try and transport myself there for some reason.
>>580721512 Hey OP, have you ever thought someone on TV was talking to you? or have you thought about telepathy? like somebody talked about what you were thinking sort of them reading your mind stuff? Because I have but I have not been diagnosed as a schizophrenic yet, are these supposed delusions related? They felt very real to me even though I know if I tell anybody they will think In nuts
>>580721927 You are correct. The 4th dimensional beings ARE contacting you. Stop denying that what they say is the truth.
You must pay close attention to these things, because you are the one who has been given this gift. Don't you think this stuff happens for a reason? If you read this at all it happened because it was supposed to.
Humans label what they don't understand as psychosis or some other arbitrary name, you know what you are so don't let any doctors try to keep the 4th dimensional messages suppressed!
>>580726274 none of this worked and i thought huh maybe they would come get me after a time period of some sort. who they were was a mystery. i was thinking it could have been the celebrities that i was telepathically fucking. at this point im rummaging through everything to find clues about this mysterious hunch that i had somehow inherited a planet. i find a jewel looking think in my moms purse that had a key wrapped up in it. i got the key out straightened the jewelry out and thought it was some sort of map of the habitable planets, there were 9 in total i believe and i had been lucky enough to get one of them. i also thought the key that was on it was a key to my mansion in vienna where an orgy of celebrities was waiting for me there. i go on the internet to set up a bank account with tangering thinking that my new found riches were going to be in there when i set it up. i would also look through books super fast to absorb their knowledge to further the development of the human species since they were all influnced by me somehow. i found an assortment of sunglasses that i thought gave me the power to see the virtual world better. i would go out at night and rummage through cars and trying to drive them thinking they were mine anyways and i was just going to borrow them. i ended up talking to my mom about how i wasnt her kid and i was made by something and that she was hypnotized into thinkin i was her kid. i told her at one point i was going on a spaceship the next day and that i was sorry for leaving here. remember the google account? i thought it was some system where i could pick who got to go with me on the spaceship. i obviously said no fat chicks. shortly after, my mom took me to a hospital and told them about my episodes and i was involuntarily admitted.
>>580726318 yeah. would watch tv and think they were talking directly about me. also movies, radio, other people conversations. please read thread before asking the same question that was asked a bunch of times before. would also talk to people on the tv in my head. >>580726417 im having a hard time believing this since it all seems crazy.
>>580727205 in the hospital i would think that i was somehow being punished for revealing the secret to the others, had a doctor whos name was hussaine and i thought he was saddam hussaine and he was testing me somehow.also thought that i was to decide what should be done with the crazy people. they were all pretty nice though got to say. met a guy in there who was crazy with conspiracy theories and said when he tries to talk about it he gets all jumbled up. i continue to think i am telepathically having sex with girls and take from a cartoon that was on that i was "stealing eggs from another basket" basically that they were not mine to be banging telepathically. HOLY SHIT CAPATCHA government egacyour
>>580727456 have you ever thought that they were not actually talking to you but that your perception was set to find any words that resonated to trigger that feeling? if you had to let go of yourself and see yourself from the outside, what would you see?
>>580727456 Of course it all seems crazy, society has told you over and over that its crazy to the point where you believe that it is crazy.
All these so called "disorders", as they are referred to by the medical community, are nothing more than the brain's evolutionary process. I assure you in 100 years time science and medicine will be able to see that what they call crazy is in fact just evolutionary progress.
But I mean, if you feel better buying into society's lies I guess that is your choice. I think deep down you know that you aren't really crazy like everyone thinks.
>>580728017 i would constantly search for words or phrases that related to my life and situation in general. i dont really understand that quesiton but i suppose i would see just a person. >>580728036 i would read up on shamans and seers and shit like that and thought that i would in the olden times be praised as a great shaman. >>580728106 this is your first post i dont understand.
>>580727831 It never occured to you that everybody feels the same way except that you obsess about it? for example when you say the thing about telephatic sex and stealing eggs from another basket, what you are doing is, first of all believing that you have the hability to have sex mind to mind (im not completly against the idea of this being possible since science is starting to catch up to nonlocal phenoma) and trying to percieve anything that reassures that thought, but you feel guilt about that, so you can relate to that phrase, stealing eggs from another basket, look, that phrase is not directed at you but it also is, you pay attention to it because you relate to it. When people watch a movie sometimes tgey relate to the characters, for example the protagonist father died, and your father also died when you were young so you relate, its normal, you are just too aware of this fact, the key is to not obsess, go with the flow and swim, not drown.
>>580727831 anywho after that incident i learned to keep my mouth shut about what i was experiencing. i felt more level headed on meds but they drug me down quite a bit which i didnt like. i actually quit taking them a bit before i left the province thinking i didnt really need them.
>>580728496 In the olden times society didn't feel the need to explain everything that it didn't understand with cut and dry answers like calling everything a disorder, etc.
But the truth is you do possess these type of characteristics similar to shamans and seers of the past. It's strange that in some ways in the olden times people were further along with accepting these type of things.
>>580722470 >used to smoke weed quit on doctors order, not immediately of course. i sued to think that life was a virtual reality game that i had to progress through and that i could survive off drugs IT IS NOT ?!
>>580729272 oh shit yeah before i left the town i was drywalling in i thought the kids were saying satanic messages to me and shit. also thought that drinking a certain energy drink made you into the cans name (eg. rockstar monster ect)
>>580729705 chemical imbalances in the brain is erious shit and it can be caused by the rush of dopamine and the inability to make it after long enough leading to you shaping your own reality to your liking
>>580728909 The anti psychotic meds that doctors prescribe are nothing more than devices to keep you docile. Doctors don't care about actually helping you in this regard, it is more to cover their asses to the effect that the medicine fogs your brain to the point that you cannot realize your full potential and instead just go through the motions of living.
The whole "chemical imbalance" theory is just nonsense. Have you ever looked to see what anti-psychotics like seroquel do chemically? They block dopamine and serotonin receptors in the brain. In effect they make you feel so down and shitty about things that you are unlikely to "act out" and do things considered insane. It's for the doctor's benefit, not yours. Plus the pharmaceutical industry makes a shitload of money off of psych meds. It's a broken system that doesn't take into account why the patient feels a certain way and instead just suppresses them with medication.
>>580729992 I never said they made a shitload of money off of you personally. You do realize that the rest of the money is paid for to the companies by the insurance or whatever was backing up your drug plan. Doctors and drug companies always get the full amount, no matter what the patient actually pays.
>>580730338 Anti-psychotics are actually quite dangerous, even the newer generation ones. They lead to a terrible motor coordination disorder called tardive dyskinesia and believe it or not studies have shown that over time it decreases brain tissue. The sleep is a side effect of the lack of serotonin after the drug is administered.
I'm not psycho, but I too believe that the world is some kind of virtual reality game.
Specially when things happen which shouldnt happen to according to math and probability theories.
For example, think about a song, and 1 min later it starts playing in the radio. Or wake up at 4 am in the morning, 1 min later phone rings and they tell me my grandma has died. And many other occasions like that.
Anyways OP, maybe you should try meditation and stilling your mind. Maybe it will help you.
>>580729317 You can only experience so much happiness in life. Drugs give you that happiness. It's like in tetris style games where you opt to receive the next line or piece faster, get your work done sooner, gain points faster, but all subsequent pieces come faster from now on. Life ends sooner, but you get all that happiness up front.
>>580730843 That's cause its all connected man. Some will call stuff deja vu or what have you, but in reality its just that something in our mind knows things that it really shouldn't. Just "schizophrenic" people are more in tune with this ability.
>>580722764 >all these elaborate and wild psychoses how come the two i've had have just been doctors are plotting to kill me and i can assemble a celestial being with my mind (also people are trying to kill me)
>>580731028 no idea. got the image from google to start thread didnt read up on it much. >>580731046 never have talked to inanimate objects no. but i remember another thing from my episodes i went out looking for snail shells thinking they were universes and the ones with snails in them were universes with life, i would test the integrity of the empty ones by crushing them between my fingers.
>>580731243 well i thought about carl sagans explanation of the fourth dimesion and such check it out here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnURElCzGc0 i just applied his demonstration to the 3rd dimension
>>580729862 the doctors information that can be looked up on universities has more on sideeffects and use (and is really easy to read) than the delivered reading material which might apply to other medications of the same ilk too and reads like a legalese defense statement.
how do you know they're actually delusions? my girl a while back,had a mild case of it(schizo) because of depression and stress and shit like that. She would act very normal around other people but act all weird when she is with people she knows.
>>580731659 supposedly both are measurable. supposedly one of two is trainable on not on accident exactly. supposedly they are not to be confused. supposedly one of them is not an illness. both of them might be connected thematically to belief in the supernatural which is bogus - and emotionally harmful to one of them.
>>580731160 or their paranoic states depend on receiving that information. or there are unsolved patterns that arouse too much and get medicated down ("no i did not want a castration, i just wanted sterile with redo option, but actually my trousers were not fitting")
>>580732024 Well that makes sense because the brainwaves would be similar which could explain why you would be more in tune to these kinds of things. >>580732103 That is another way to look at it, there's no way to know for sure even though science claims to have all the answers.
>>580730462 i get it now, in highschool before this all transpired i answered the question of free will in this way, if you beleive in it the more you will find evidence of its existance, if you do not believe vice versa
Okay - here is some fuckedupness. Having had direct experiences which caused me to read about others who'd had the same, I'm pretty much 100% convinced that other..."beings"...have been interacting with humanity for as long as we've been here. Problem is, people are ALSO delusional. Have you ever had experiences that you suspect aren't real versus one that you suspect are?
>>580732376 >>580732565 I think you would have to question what reality really is before you can know that. My reality is certainly different from yours, does that mean one of us is insane? Who is the absolute authority on the issue of what is real anyway?
Actually, that's not true. It's just that fake sensory data is almost as convincing as real sensory data.
One is always often half-sure of things, so while one may believe one's general delusions to be unrealistic spur of the mind, if they persist, they get more convincing, even if one afterwards or in moments think that they were unrealistic and part of a schizophrenic thing.
Imagine that you're hallucinating in the desert due to dehydration, how much of you know that it is real and how much that is not real? Not 100% either way.
I know hallucianations and delusions aren't necessarily the same thing, but one's understanding of things are not a 100% fixed either way.
It's only a pattern that one detects after a while when one can then say that one is schizophrenic. I'd imagine depression is much the same way, one is not a 100% convinced of the validity nor the invalidity of depressive thoughts but it is detected as a pattern with highs and lows.
Note, I don't have schizophrenia but have experiences with depression. One is not fixed to one direction only, there are nuancing thoughts and after-thoughts.
Well, schizophrenia is certainly real and it usually gets worse with age. I've heard about therapists heading it off in the early stages...sort of retarding its development, but I can't remember what or who.
Most of what you experience probably is a rsult of the illness, but don't beat yourself up over it. You may well have an uncommon structure in your brain that occasionally detects something most others usually can't, but it'll be 100 years before science ever figures it out.
Concentrate on dealing with this for the long haul. If you don't get it under control you'll end up living in a homeless shelter.
>>580732943 oh shit man, i think that caused my psychosis. i was on 9th month ejaculation free and did heavy chi-gong and i think that fucked up my brain. No one in my femily has mental illness and i didnt do drugs
>>580732361 there is no free will without options or market. are there tools without property, any? (even if it is free for all not necessairily owned by someone else even or ones own). even energy needs matter. (and yes there is the light/wave-matter duality and quantum which are both a little bit bogus).
I have thoughts for example " i was speaking out loud, I said something stupid out loud" when really I didn't speak at all, can you shed any light on this if You know anything or have experienced anything like this ?
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