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WTF is happening to my dick /b/?

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 311
Thread images: 60

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WTF is happening to my dick /b/?
>>
it's slowly dying
>>
>>553351385
aids.
nah talking srsly, thats because you either fapped too much and too quick or you fucked to much and too quick.
>>
It's going to explode. Cum-splosion if you will. Post pics.
>>
It's sticking it's tongue out at you

Carry on
>>
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>>
>>553351385
Wow.

I thought mine was bad

I would try to poke a hole in it.
>>
>>553351385
you need to drain that right now or it will turn septic, get a razor blade and slice it.
>>
>uncut
>>
>>553351385

looks like it's pouting to me
>>
Looks kinda like an allergic reaction or something, how about going to the goddamn hospital you fucking retard
>>
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Another pic
Is it evolving or some shit
Becoming a cobra wtf is this
>>
>>553351385
it's turning into a vagina
>>
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Just go see a doctor you embarrassed fuck
>>
No date stamp. No help from us.
>>
yeast infection
>>
>>553351642
as i said, you gotta pull the skin to the front and let it rest...
>>
>>553351385
This was on a bbc show, I don't remember what it is but you really should go to hospital, of course post pics as you are treated
>>
>>553351642
wat
>>
>>553351385
its called the donut effect. wear a condom next time you penis pump
>>
>>553351642
Go to the hospital
>>
>>553351385

I'm in london man, it's not even 2 am
>>
>>553351642
>becoming a cobra
>>
>>553351385
Happened me. Your forskin is too tight and it's stopped the blood going back. You need to lube it up and roll your forskin back over your tip.

IT will hurt btw...good luck. Don't leave it. I had to go to the hospital with it. You don't want some guy handeling your junk
>>
take the rubber band off it. and have you penis pumped lately?
>>
Had that happen once but not that bad. Definitely from too much fapping
>>
>>553351385

Fake as fuck
Its 1:25am in the UK

Also he could just go see a doctor for nothing.
>>
>>553351385
>>553351642

If it itches and it's segregating whiteish material (that is clearly not cum) then you should just stop fapping for few days and wash it often, it'll cure by itself
>>
>>553351754
yep, no date stamp....i suggest amputation
>>
No reason to ever be circumsized.... lol
>>
>>553351642

see a doctor lol
>>
>>553351919
whats the deal with having a trained physician taking a look professionaly on your problem? grow up dude.
>>
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Forgot date stamp... Sry
It's in the middle of the fucking night guys, I can't really go to a doctor, or want to atm
Also too embarassed...
>>
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>>553351385
You obviously have a solid circular object stuck under your gross exess penis skin.
>>
>>553352285
Dude, go to the doctor!
>>
>>553352081
>segregating
>>
Stick a needle into the swollen sections, make sure they are sterile though.

Also disinfect the area where you are going on.

That shit can lead to necrosis
>>
>>553352208
>wanting your dick to be mutilated
>>
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>>553352285
Jesus fucking christ
>>
>>553351385
You are about to die anon, my friend has this, it turned black and he died of infection, I am so sorry...
>>
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>>553352285
WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU ON /b/ YOU GO TO THE DOCTOR RIGHT NOW. THAT SHITS NOT NATURAL.
>>
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dun worreh op

shit happened to me last thursday. docs couldnt flip it back over so i had to get a circumcision.
>>
>>553352285
Pop it please
>>
>>553352285

would you rather have your dick fall off?
>>
>>553351920
this.
its a fucking rubber band
>>
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a generic mutation in your dna. come with me to the tardis so that i may examinate it.

trust me, i'm a doctor.
>>
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I think my dick is kill
>>
>>553352285
>>553352285
>>553352285

its 1 am nigga not 2
>>
>>553352285
see what happens when you get a boner
>>
>>553352352

English is not everyone's first language man
>>
oh ur uncut that explains it all
>>
>>553352458
>when my dick turned black, my girlfriend died of a ruptured cervix
>>
>>553352584
this.
>>
Mine does this when i fuck, i have a tight foreskin and it sometimes gets trapped. Just pull the skin forwards dont touch it to much.
>>
squeeze it as hard as you can
>>
>>553351385
>>
>>553352285
>Also too embarassed...

>HELP /B/ my dick is falling off, but i am too embarrassed to go to the docs.
shit ain't real anyways
>>
>>553352557
go take a bath in warm water, see if you can return the foreskin to a normal position
>>
>>553352557
I'm laughing so hard right now 10/10
>>
>>553352557
that head
>>
>come to 4chan
>see a strange dick
>holyshitwhatthehellman.jpeg
>inspect bit more
>realize OP is playing with his dick and people are actually concerned
>MFW
>>
>>553351385
Take a pic from front, head on facing towards your stomach. Please.

##################%%%%%%%%%
>>
Does it hurt? BTW its 0132 here in the UK
>>
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>>553352584
fuck you
>>
>>553352990
Whatever you say Professor Doctor Anon
>>
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Go to the doctor first thing tomorrow. Don't be embarrassed, the doctor sees shit like this, if not worse, on a daily basis. The doc will set you straight. Its better than something serious happening to your dick. You love your dick don't you?
>>
>>553352990

hey my dick is cut and i have never seen a dick look so fucked up before
>>
>>553352557

> Hire an escort
> ask for a handjob
> tell us what happens
>>
Fap Harder.
Here.
>http://imgurl.us/?id=f570b1da-155d-6401-01ae3878513a8cd9
>>
This is what you get for not getting circumcised.
Blame your parents
>>
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>>553352557
Take a picture of the aftermath when it falls off, OP.
>>
Have you tried taking the rubber band/string off your dick OP?
>>
>>553351642
call 911 that could be life threatening.
>>
>>553353223
>doctor first thing tomorrow.
dick is fucked and turning purple. best advice is go tomorrow and not now. GENIUS
>>
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>>553353421
Do it.
>>
>>553351385
my dick was swollen like this (though not quite as bad) a few months ago, was too rough and not using lube. itll be fine in a day or two.
>>
OP get that shit checked at this rate your gonna get gangrene on your dick and it will just fall off

You will need to get circumsized
I am a doctor
>>
All you uncut fags talk shit about circumcision, and then this shit happens to you.
Smart.
>>
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>>553353051
>>553352061
I live in switzerland, thought it's the same time zone
>Inb4 op is retarded
Yup

>>553353021
Uh, here you go...
>>
>>553354017
Actually this is a normal part of pubrity ...every young man goes through this...best thing to do is just rub deoderant on it and rest it...

I am a doctor
>>
>>553354246

OP is a troll. No way would he be able to take pictures and post on /b/ while his penis I like that.
>>
>>553353868

Well then go to the fucking ER. Jesus Christ.
>>
>>553354246
I'm on my laptop now, guys
op here
>>
>>553354246

did you stick it in the vaccum. im not kidding.
>>
>>553352285
A&E you fucking penis
>>
Get a wart removal kit and you can freeze it after which it will fall off cleanly.
>>
>>553354246
Try using something like Gentalin Beta, if you don't know what it is google it
>>
>>553354246


How long ago did this start happening?
Did you do anything to it?
Do you sleep on your stomach?

It looks a little swollen if it didn't happen to long ago put some Ice on it, just to reduce the swelling this will greatly help you in the long run.

ice it a bunch for a while.

If it happened you know 15 hours ago or started then. Put a hot compress on it.
>>
W?????????h??????????a??????t????????????? ?????????t?????h????????????????????? ????????f????????u????c????k???????????? ????????d??????????ïd???????? ???????????y???????o???????u??????????? ???????????j?????u??????????š??t? ???????????f????????????u????????c??????????????????????i???????????n??????????????? ????????????????a??????????y??????? ????????????a????????????o??????u????????t???????? ?????????????m?e?????,?????? ??????????y??o?????????? ?????l??????i?????????t???????t??????????l????????? ???????????b??i???????????c????????h??????????????????????
>>
was on my phone, sorry it took so long to answer guys

>>553354580
Confirmed
>>
Mosquito bite
>>
>>553352285
What is more embarrassing? Going to a doctor or losing your dick because you did not go to the doctor?
>>
>>553351642
You sure you didn't just tie a piece of string around it tight and are just fucking with us?
>>
had this shit happen a couple times, it's normally an allergic reaction. Swelling goes away with time, dick is not kill. Just wait it out.
>>
>>553354817
Yea you have the same ID. Also gang schnell zum doktor du vollidiot
>>
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>>553352285
>>553352557
>>553354246
>>553354580

it's water, let it be or take any diuretics if you have them, coffee is a diuretic, and alcohol too, take anything that will make you piss excessive amounts of water, this will go away on it's own in a few days to 2 weeks but if you want to speed it up take diuretics

it's edema, it's a sign of heart/kidney problems, if it happens to your feet and hands too, you have got to go to the doctor immediately
>>
>>553354246
I meant head on. Pic of the tip from directly out in front, penis tip facing camera. Please.

#############€€€€€€€€€€€€€€
>>
AHHHHHHHHHHHH WHATA THE FUCK AHHHHHHHh
>>
>>553355207
>It's water
>it's edema

We have a doctor
>>
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I'd be a whole lot more embarrassed having to explain why I can't fuck a woman to her then a member of medical staff handle muh dick.
Besides its kinda like a free handjob
Just make sure to cum on them
>>
>>553355582
Keked
>>
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>>553354817

Oh and do not puncture it with a needle or cut it open with anything, that's the worst thing you could do, because it needs to be expelled naturally, or you'll get a electrolyte imbalance which can lead to atrial fibrilation and eventually left ventricular damage

so i repeat, do not cut it or stick a needle in it, or you will feel extreme electric shocks in your heard which will be very painful and possibly lethal because of the mineral imbalance edema causes if it's not left alone
>>
>>553354817
so guys, wtf should I do, I don't want to go to doctor, it's a small town... besides, I'm not that worried YET, only started to look like this couple of hours ago, got back from a field trip, it keeps getting worse, that's my only worry. My guess is some shit bit me... but wtf
I figured maybe some /b/ros experienced sth like this already, and I can go to sleep without worrying that my dick will burst or some shit...

>inb4 op is a fag and he got fag disease
>>
Paraphimosis mayn

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis

Go to hospital IMMEDIATELY, I ain't even kidding!
>>
>>553355776
fuck nigga OP can actually die
>>
>>553355765
Prove it's nightime
Take a picture looking out a with the same timestamp as first pic.
>>
>>553355776
Good work anon.
>>
the sooner you go to the hospital the better chances your dick has to survice...
>>
>>553355765
either go to A&E and get it sorted (how many people will you know there at this time of night?) or post pics of your soon to be dead cock.
>>
>>553355776
Mein loudest lol. Compare dem dicks..
Op's shaft is red and blue too... That's an allergic reaction, not paraphimosis
>>
>>553351727
OMG i need to know what is this.
I know it is Hatsune Miku, but WHAT IS THIS.
>>
>>553354604
>>
>>553351385
as is the case with most of these threads, the answer you're looking for OP, is GO TO AN EMERGENCY ROOM.

That's a severe swelling
>>
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this is gonna happen to OPs dick if he doesnt go to the hospital
>>
>>553355776
rip in peace op the faggot
>>
>>553354246
Just put some Bengay on your dick and rub thoroughly and it will go away after a few hours
>>
>>553355207
>>553355716
the only guy sounding legit on here, thx
nah my hands are ok, my feet are a bit swollen, but i guess that's from a lot of walking I did the past days. Thanks man, I'll try that

what really starts worrying me, is that there are black spots on my dick

wat do
>>
>>553351385
Honestly, if this really, truly isn't a troll

GO TO A FUCKING DOCTOR YOU IDIOT. THIS IS YOUR ONE AND ONLY COCK WE'RE TALKING ABOUT. IT GETS FUCKED UP, THAT'S THE END. NO MORE SEX OR, IF VIRGIN, CHANCE OF HAVING SEX EVER AGAIN. GO TO A DOCTORRRR YOU DENSES MOTHER FUCKERRRRR
>>
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stop being just a fucking pussy and go to the hospital. who the fuck cares what people think about your dick
>>
>>553356363
His dick will turn into a rotten foot!!! D:
>>
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>>553355776
now OP into the doc before dick is kill
>>
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>>553354246
>switzerland
>london time stamp
>op heavily retarted
>mfw
>>
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>>553351642
Go to the hospital you dumbshit. Your dick is going to fall off in 2 hours exactly.
>>
>>553356483
This.

Everyone at the hospital has seen worse shit than your dick.
>>
>>553351642
stop twisting it
>>
>>553356459
>black spots

Nigga, you got Ebola. Haven't you been paying attention to the news?
>>
Yep it's a paraphimosis. Go to the hospital or gamble with losing your cock (friendly advice from medical pro).
>>
>>553356462
IF HE WILL TAKE A PICTURE OF THE OUTSIDE WE CAN START DECIPHERING THIS.
The first picture he took looks likes natural lighting, not by lightbulbs or fluorescents
>>
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>>553356459
>>
>>553356459
> black spots
OP CONFIRMED FOR NECROSIS
OP CONFIRMED FOR GANGRENE
DICK CONFIRMED FOR DEAD
>>
>>553356459
HEY OP, YA THINK YA GOT A BRUISED DICK, M8?
>>
CUTFAGS DON'T HAVE THIS PROBLEM YOU FUCKING HEATHEN.
>>
>>553356929
wtf
>>
>>553355776
See
>>553354017
You are correct but since this isn't medical practice the easiest thing to say it's gangrene.

I should know I'm a doctor
>>
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IT'S PARAPHIMOSIS.

YOU DUMB SHIT.

GO.
TO.
THE.
FUCKING.
HOSPITAL.
NOW.
>>
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>>553354246
your dick is looking for a mate
>>
Seriously OP doctors have to pull stuff from people's asses all day and you've done nothing wrong or embarrassing. You have to act quick otherwise that shit's gonna rot and send toxins in your whole blood system.

>>553356298

How about you look up other pics of paraphimosis before talking dipshit
>>
>>553352291
i think this wizard is correct
>>
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>>553356808
>mfw my I.D.
>>
>>553352285
Who cares if you're embarrassed, I don't want you die of a cock explosion.
>>
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mfw op is worrying about his dick but won't go the the hospital
>>
why isn't there a good old cock rate thread?!
>>
>>553356808
>69With6Dicks

I VOTE BEST ID OF ALL TIME!
OF ALL TIME!
>>
>>553351385
OP I believe you have paraphimosis, where your foreskin is caught behind the glans (head) and it has become swollen. Get it checked out it can get pretty serious.
>>
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>>553357149
>>
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>>553357149
>>
>>553354246
If it is some allergic reaction/infection, you should definitely see a doctor.

Carefully look out for ticks (Zecken) all over your body.

Cooling with ice or some ointments may help against the swelling until later in the morning.


>>553356459
I guess OP is troll, if not, at least read up on the things he mentioned, before believing.
>>
>>553357004
>wtf

11/10 sides have reached warp speed
>>
>>553356808
>Ebola
do I look like a fucking nigger?
>>
Fucking retarded europoor not taking advantage of government issued free health care. I hope you die for being a retarded faggot.
>>
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>>553357149
Oh man, that's too good

>>553356929
Sorry to say that thee gene pool will be better without you OP
>>
>>553357196
>cock explosion

top kek
>>
>>553357076
Lol
>>
>>553356808
That ID...the mods are here guys.
>>
>>553355765
OP PLEASE CAM SO WE CAN WATCH YOU DIE IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO THE DOCTOR.
PLEASE.
>>
>>553357149
ur ID MAN!
>>
>>553351575
Don't do it OP you will make mustard gas
>>
op if you aren't gonna take our advice and go to the hospital then leave
>>
>>553357420
how about you stop responding to trolls and save your own life?
seriously if you're too embarrassed to act.. you don't deserve a dick
>>
>>553357521
This op please make a stream
>>
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>>553357149
Omfg
>>
>>553356929
>>553354246
Dude are you fucking serious? go to the goddamn hospital you ignorant cunt.

You're talking about your goddamn dick for fucks sake, you lose that shit and you might as well fucking off yourself because life will have next to no purpose for you anymore. goodbye natural imperative.
>>
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OPS dick gonna fall off.
Pic related
>>
I had the same thing. I went to the doctor and he took the inflamed prepuce and pulled out.
>>
>>553352285

Looks like you broke your dick - like popped the bit that engorges and now you fucked ... they fix it by cutting your dick open like a banana and sewing the membrane back up.
>>
>>553356963
No, their problem is always having a sad cum, lollol
>>
>>553357602
You Id man!
>>
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>>553357602

your ID is bretty great as well
>>
>>553357602
Nice ID.
>>
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>>553356808
69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck 69W6DIck
>>
ID Roll.
>>
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>>553357602
>poop
>>
>>553351551
>fuck
>>
>>553357939
This is why IDs are shit.
>>
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>>553357602
my ID OMGERD

this is best day ever

this is me hah
>>
>>553358057
this is the greatest ID in history
>>
>>553356328
nice id
>>
>>553356929

I think I see where the spider bit you ...
>>
Did you put it in a vacuum cleaner?
>>
>>553358057
had to ruin it
>9gag
>>
PARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSISPARAPHIMOSIS PARAPHIMOSIS

> really man, go to the fucking doctor
>>
>>553357064
>PARAPHIMOSIS
>Paraphimosis (/?pær?fa??mo?s?s/ or /?pær?f??mo?s?s/[1][2]) is an uncommon[3] medical condition where the foreskin becomes trapped behind the glans penis, and cannot be reduced (pulled back to its normal flaccid position covering the glans penis). If this condition persists for several hours or there is any sign of a lack of blood flow, paraphimosis should be treated as a medical emergency, as it can result in gangrene.[3][4][5]
>medical emergency
OP your dick might actually be kill right now
>>
>>553351385
Paraphimosis, check it out on wikipedia.
>>
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>>553358214
pffft ruin it? more like ENHANCE it! hah

mfw
>>
>>553355997
Better timestamp would be if he showing his dick out of the window.
>>
>>553357407
good input, thanks... will check

thanks anons who actually try to help
it can't be paraphimosis, my dick was fine ever since
never had problems with my foreskin, besides my dick is warm (body temperature) so I guess it means it has enough blood flow...


tho the troll replies had me kek a few times, thx guys
>>
OPs dick dead yet?
>>
>>553358335
Ironic shit posting is still shit posting.
>>
>>553357420
OP
READ THIS FUCKING ARTICLE

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis

THE BLACK SPOTS ARE THE BEGINNING OF NECROTIC FLESH YOU IDIOT GO TO THE HOSPITAL IMMEDIATELY
>>
>>553358397
>troll replies
I don't think you fucking understand what's going on here buddy.
>>
>>553358397
OP this is what paraphimosis looks like on wikipedia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paraphimosis#mediaviewer/File:Paraphimosis.jpg

look familiar? go to the hospital before your dick is worse than kill
>>
>>553358161
what's so special about it.
Nothing like 69 with 6 dicks or whatevs
>>
>>553351887
This guy here answered the question.
Seriously.
>>
>>553358397
>>553358591
He's not trolling! At least go there and see what they'll say to you. We're trying to save your dick here man!
>>
>>553357149
shieeeet
>>
>>553357602
>>553357967
10/10 100/100 best ids ever.
>>
>>553358397
enough blood flow? The blood getting trapped OP

wwhy you think your thread got so many replies?
Because people want to see your dick fall off OP
>>
OP is dead...
and still a faggot
>>
>>553351385
If this is legit you need to go to the hospital this instant so you don't lose your dick.
>>
>>553358397

Fool, your dick is dying and you will follow if you don't act.
Look at these pics.

https://www.google.fr/search?q=paraphimosis&client=firefox-a&hs=ZTM&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&channel=sb&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=EsWsU630G8fW0QW324GIBQ&ved=0CAgQ_AUoAQ&biw=1280&bih=689

http://cdn.lifeinthefastlane.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/20052_3_Pen_O.jpg
>>
>>553358397
You legitimately might lose your penis.
>>
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>>553351385
kill it with FIRE

>captha: IOGEYMEN
>>
>>553352285
go to A 'N' E

You're in the UK, the NHS covers it and can probably give you an immediate diagnosis.
>>
Waiting op to post his big black rotten cock once more, just 4tehlulz
>>
>>553351887
Bumping this until OP acknowledges.
>>
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Pop it with a needle OP. DO IT.
>>
Another uncut fag becomes a trans because their dick got infected and rotted off... The reason /b/ is so full of fags.
>>
I'm off to bed. May OP rest in peace. I shall dream happy dreams in where my penis is just perfectly fine, maybe a bit small, but just fine nonetheless, whilst yours is dying. Good night.
>>
>>553358397
>it can't be paraphimosis, my dick was fine ever since
What the fuck does that mean? You said your dick was like that for a couple of hours. To quote wikipedia...

>If this condition persists for several hours or there is any sign of a lack of blood flow, paraphimosis should be treated as a medical emergency, as it can result in gangrene.[3][4][5]
>>
>>553351385
What in the name of god is that?
>>
>>553359201
Don't worry, I'm sure yours will retract inside of you someday.
>>
>>553358002

Fuck off faggot.

Without ID's you can never truly tell if it's OP posting, or some fucking little nigger like yourself.

Might make for epic trolling, but it's shit when you're trying to follow a convo, you fucking drag queen.
>>
This thread is why I still come here.

RIP PENIS.
>>
>>553352557
>>553352285
>>553351642
>>553351385
That is because you don't keep your dick clean like you should.

>go take a hot shower
>right before you get out of the shower pop that Puss sack at the tip of your dick
>let the water run over it to clean it.
>go to doctor A.S.A.P.
>>
>>553351385
If you're not living in the UK:
go to a hostpital you dumb fuck, you can worry about debts when you don't have gangreene (which untreated paraphimosis leads to)

the NHS isn't going to send debt collectors to your door, only sternly worded letters

>If you are living in the UK
go to a hostpital you dumb fuck
>>
>>553359337

>what are trips
>what are timestamps
>>
rest in piss, dick
>>
>>553359413
It's not a fucking puss sack, it will be kill if he doesn't hurry.
>>
poor OP
>>
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This thread is worth pinnig... get it? Ha.TABLE uptionaL
>>
Jesus Christ.
You're going to lose your dick or something if you don't get to a hospital immediately.
>>
OP save your dick man, look at it, its getting blue in the middle, it means blood flow is obstructed

ER man, ER, go run, wave your dick to their faces, fast

you even made /b/ care and you think its not fucking serious.....
>>
rub alcohol on it
>>
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>>
>>553357064
yeah its true

go heal your dick !!
>>
man this is just sad
your mother probably wants grandchildren right so grow some balls and some gratitude and get the fuck into hospital you stupid sack of shit
>>
OP please if you arent going to the hospital start streaming right now, i want to see you an hero
>>
OP didn't post in a "post itt or else" thread.
>>
>>553351385
You are pregnant.
>>
wow, OP is a moron. Cowboy up and take yourself to a damn clinic or something, dickcheese.
>>
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>>553358397
stop being fool. go to the doctor as fast as you can. it means now. it will reduce the sequels.
>>
OP, if you are still lurking, make sure you keep us updated. You refuse to go to the doctor or hospital so I can't help you there. I might as well see the suffering that ensues, so keep us posted.
>>
Fuck it. I'm going to bed just because I realised OP is laying inconscious or probably has already gone to the hospital, where the paramedics will try to save the useless piece of dead meat of OP's dick. See ya tomorrow, guise
>>
>>553359941
OP's dick will probably be kill on the way there. he may as well just time-laps photos of his dick for a while for science. obviously OP doesn't really care about his dick, why should we?
>>
>>553358397
Seriously.
>it's warm so that means proper blood flow
>never happened to me before so i'm fine
Get to a fucking hospital.
>>
guys OP died because his dick exploded.
>>
>>553351642
Did you fuck lately?
>>
someone replace the pic on wikipedia with OP
>>
guys, so I read the wikipedia article for treating paraphimosis, if it really is that, and I guess I'll try cooling it with some ice or some shit or if it remains like this for the next hour I'll poke some holes in it

ppl saying rush to hospital, fuck dat shit nearest hospital prolly 20 minutes, and I guess I'd have to stay there 2-3 hours
besides I'm fucking exhausted...
>>
op is kill ?
>>
>>553360441
my sides, my fucking sides
>>
>>553351385
If you want to save your penis, go to the emergency room now. Not later, not tomorrow, not 2 days from now, like right now. Your penis is going to constrict more and get painful. Looks like you have an infection of some sort.

Source: none but it looks bad enough where you need to go now.
>>
>>553360496
OP is not kill.
Post pictures if you poke holes
>>
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>>553360326
This thread..is hilarious
>>
>>553360496
OP I will pray for your dick

Post pics when it falls off pls
>>
>>553358397
Does it itch?
>>
>>553360496
OP you aren't a professional surgeon, dammit. Go to the hospital.
>>
>>553360496
Well then byebye OP's dick
>>
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>>553358397
OP is going to actually die
>>
>>553360496
You only have one dick. Are you sure you wanna risk losing it?
>>
>>553360496
Your exhausted? Your dick is going to fall off and it will have its rest.

Put holes in your dick? That won't save shit you'll end up dying since the blood is getting trapped

Are you insane OP?
>>
Op is dead we all know this right ?
>>
>>553351385
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA IM LAUGHING SO HARD RIGHT NOW
I'M NOT EVEN KIDDING

THIS DICK LOOKS SO AWEFUL OMG
>>
>>553360496
Dude srsly fucking srs man go..too..HOSPITAL
Or post your penis on floor tomorrow
>>
Anyone archived?
>>
>>553351385
>slam in car door

>post results
>>
>>553360496
Do you have a MtF fetish or some shit? If my dick looked like that, or there was any chance of it dying/being cut off, i'd stay up for hours upon hours and wait if I had to.
>>
six spics burgers and dicks
>>
My id
>>
Do not try and cut into it. more than likely they will give you an anti inflammatory cream and some antibiotics. go to the hospital you dumb mother fucker.
>>
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>>553360496
OP you're literally going to lose your dick. If you let them know that it's paraphimosis in the late stages, they'll take you in INSTANTLY and do what they have to do. If you continue doing this, you're going to die.
>>
holy fuck dude
>>
>>553360496
>would rather have dick rot off than make a 20 minute trip to the hospital.

you're a fool, i hope your dick does rot off.
>>
>>553360496
OP you are a gigantic faggot. I downloaded your pic to check geo-exif data and there is none. I'm legitimately thinking of doxxing you and calling 911 because your dick is going to be gangrenous.
>>
>>553360496
You're an idiot.
>>
>>553361081
Not only will O.P loose this dick he will die.
>>
>>553354460
glad im not the only one that realizes this
>>
>>553351385
it's paraphimosis in the late stages, if you don't call 911 you will literally die in a couple of hours.
>>
>>553360496
>God.
>Fucking.
>Damn it.
Hope your last fuck was the best fuck of your life, because you'll be peeing sitting down forever after tonight.
And if you're a virgin, well... kill yourself now.

I've stopped caring about you and your dick. Just fucking kill yourself you stupid cunt.
>>
>this fucking thread
>>
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really OP, you're too tired to save your dick ????
you gonna poke holes ??????

Its 3:30 AM and I'm gonna actually stay awake just to see the next picture with your dick on the floor
>>
OP should shape his balloon-dick into various animals.
>goes to hospital
>doctor, i've got a problem with my privates
>pulls down pants
>doctor's face when OP's dick is a poodle
>>
>>553357851
AUDO

this is a fucking great thread for ID's
>>
>>553360496
posting in epic bread. hope to see this archived one day
>>
This thread made me feel very appreciative of my cock. Thanks OP.
>>
>>553361357
THREAD CONTINUATION! THIS THREAD 404ING SOON SO GO HERE WHEN IT DOES
>>
>>553360496

fuck you op, 20 minutes is not that long and when they see the state of your dick theyll take care of you in urgency. have you no respect for yourself? get that healed! it's a fucking dick, not a pin cushion! your dick is infected and only professional assistance can help, besides the needles you use to burst it won't even be sterilized properly so you'll even worsen it. jesus christ man!!!!!
>>
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>>553357446
Thanks
>>
So that's what a rusty venture looks like
>>
>>553360496
>This involves compressing the glans and moving the foreskin back to its normal position, perhaps with the aid of a lubricant, cold compression, and local anesthesia as necessary.
This has already gone far enough that it can't just be pushed back. Those black spots are either blood clots (scary) or necrosis (literally dying flesh (dick-falling-off-scary))

>If this fails, the tight edematous band of tissue can be relieved surgically with a dorsal slit or circumcision.
You really thing slicing chunks of your cock with a steak knife is a good replacement for delicate surgery?

>the Dundee technique, entails placing multiple punctures in the swollen foreskin with a fine needle, and then expressing the edema fluid by manual pressure.
Do you know how to avoid important areas?
Do you have sterile needles, or do you want an septic cock?

GO TO A FUCKING HOSPITAL YOU IDIOT

...at least livestream any attempt at fixing it yourself
>>
>>553351385
>sees this
>doesn't go to the hospital immediately

Wtf OP
>>
thanks for all the people concerning, I am cooling it atm, hope it will help

>>553360757
yup, it does itch a bit

so I researched a bit, it can't be paraphimosis, my dick is warm it's getting enough blood, paraphimosis would mean the bloodflow is cut off and it turns blue then black
>>
>>553358397
If you don't go to a hospital you will die, i'm not trolling.
>>
>>553361721
OP, how are you cooling your dick? post pics
>>
>>553360496
that's a funny story to tell your kids: "i lost my dick because i was to exhausted to go to the hospital and didn't want to wait there"

oh wait you can't kids anymore
>>
>>553357149
Best id ever
>>
File: squirtle.jpg (2KB, 77x90px) Image search: [Google]
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op's dick looks like squirtle
>>
More pics
>>
>>553361721
the blood is trapped inside, it's paraphimosis. your dick IS turning blue. it already has dead flesh and blood clots. OP, you're going to loseyour penis, and then you will fucking die. go to the hospital. the doctors have seen worse shit than this, they won't care, there's no need to be embarassed
>>
>>553357420
>3 inch dick with swollen-extra
nope, not at all
>>
File: op is kill.gif (687KB, 404x189px) Image search: [Google]
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OP IS KILL NOW
OP IS KILL GUISE

GUISE OP KILL
>>
>>553361721
Your dick is turning blue you massive faglord.
>>
>>553361721
CUT IT OFF BEFORE YOU DIE OR GO TO A GOD DAMNED HOSPITAL YOU IGNORANT, THICK SKULLED, FUCKING DIP SHIT, CUNT, NIGGER, FAGGOT ASS, FUCK TWIT.
>>
>>553361721
Even if its warm you still can not get enough blood. Stop denying this, if you don't go to the hospital you will die.
>>
>>553361721
>the bloodflow is cut off and it turns blue then black
Just because your dick is warm, doesent mean that it has bloodflow. The colours blue and then black thing is already happening
>>
>>553361721
Just because it's warm, does not mean it's not paraphimosis.

OP just think about this. This is your penis. Your dick. If you lose this what do you have? It's worth the embarrassment. No one here is a doctor, but it looks a hell a lot like paraphimosis. Your best bet would be to go to the hospital, because there are black spots.
>>
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>>553361350
>>
>>553351385
Looks like Paraphimosis
If you cant get the foreskin over your glans you should go to the hospital as it could get really serious
If you do, give it a rest , don't masturbate for a few days and then start stretching your foreskin -> Google
>>
>>553361721

how about you let PROFESSIONALS determine the bloodflow?
you're a stupid fuck and you're going to die
throwing icecubes on it wont help dipshit
and paraphimosis is hardly mistakable.
are you even stressed by the fact that youre gonna die? you sound like you dont give 2 shits
you'd rather stay on the comp amirite? piece of shit
>>
>>553361721
>Cooling your dick.

I hope these images are Photoshopped and we all got trolled

Because OP your dick is going to fall off

Can you go on tinychat so we can see the process on how your dick falls off and rots away?
>>
>>553361861
>Implying OP will have kids when he has no dick.
>>
>OP asks for medical advice from /b/
>everybody says go to the doctor
>OP doesn't want to go to the doctor "because he's tired"
>Meanwhile his dick is swelling and turning a deep purple
OP is a fucking retard. Go to the doctor you lazy shit!
>>
>>553360496
inb4 op dies a horrible death.
>>
>>553361357
GO TO DIS THREAD GUISE
WE CONTINUE THERE

Op, if not kill, go >>553361357
>>
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>>553361903
or like arbok
>>
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>>553360496
>if it remains like this for the next hour I'll poke some holes in it

Holy fuck are you retarded? Do you want to get your dickcut off? That's how you do it.

Your dick is your most fragile organ, and you're taking this as if it was a fucking joke, posting it on /b/.

Just pin holes in it already if you want to fuck your dick for good, but don't ask for help and then tell us it's all right you dumbfuck.
>>
>>553351385
Infection probably, but see a doctor you fucking fool.
>>
>>553361721
Maybe this is how america ends
People knowing they're dying, but would rather argue on the internet than spend 20mins driving somewhere.

I fucking hate you OP
>>
I wish I had a cool id
>>
>>553361721
OP MORE PICS
Thread posts: 311
Thread images: 60


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