When are we gonna make our own wrestling fed guys?

>>3097833
when someone comes up with the money to book a show. im broke, how about you fag?

>>3097833
Just make a bunch of clickbait top 10 wrestling videos and abuse youtube's advertisement system to make millions of dollars then waste it all paying indie guys to flip around for you entertainment.

>>3098324
>Whatculture
>Click bait

When will this meme end. They are literally the opposite of click bait. They literally tell you what's going to be in the video in the title, you insufferable parroting retard.

>>3099253
Seething

>>3099356
But he's not wrong

>Ring rental: $400-800
>Venue rental: $500-2,000
>Talent: $300+ (depending on if you're using yarders, local guys or actual draws)
>plus insurance, a promoter licence, depending on the state ($20k where I live)

whose gonna make the investment?

>>3100511
I'll make my nephew get cancer and we can use his make a wish on it.

>>3100586
based

Who should we book?

>>3100683
How about the ryback? He isn't really doing anything.

>>3100687
He would bitch and moan about our company on his podcast too much

>>3100511
You're better off buying a ring instead of renting. You can get a decent one for $1500 that'll last years.

A lot of decent talent you could get out for under $100, but you'd have to cover gss as well.

>>3100690
"And then that fucking promoter had the nerve to tell me to please have sex"

>>3098319
how much does booking a show cost?
i think i can get a decent ring built.

Our main event will be tjp vs nakameme in a dab contest... RATINGS

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We could probably get the sham wow guy to be our color commentator for a year for an 8 ball

>>3100683
Everyone from GFW

>>3100586
holy fuck

Fuck "talent". Fuck "draws". Fuck "trained wrestlers".
Let's just do it ourselves. We can all get together with our various mental and social disabilities and have meme gimmicks, and drop each other on our heads because we're untrained and too obese/out of shape to actually lift each other and perform full moves, then those of us that live past the first 3 minutes of a match without becoming potatoes can lay around gasping for breath while the 3 people in attendance boo the shit out of us.
It'll be great.

>>3100800
if everyone here can agree on a location to do it, and pay out of pocket for their travel expenses, then yes

>>3100805
It would have to be a bingo hall

>>3100805
it has to be in New Jersey

>>3100831
>>3100836
And to complete the trifecta in accordance with it being the worst wrestling show of all time, it has to have a big sign over the door that says NO REFUNDS.

>>3097833
>When are we gonna make our own wrestling fed guys?

Ill book an /asp/ card with you

CM Punk vs Ryback

>>3100800
Legit kek'd.
Your plan is magnificent anon.

>>3100877
that should be the name of the show.

ASPW (Autistic, Sexless, Pro Wrestling) presents: NO REFUNDS!

>>3101501
We need the TNA audience so how about Athletic Suspenseful Pro Wrestling

>>3100877
and it has to start 2 hours after the advertised bell time

>>3101501
Book it.

>>3100800
idk, dude, I dont want to step on GZW's territory

I call dibs on being called Beaner Andrew

>>3100586
This

>>3100800
Make an invasion angle /asp/ vs pajeet wrestlers vs WAW

>>3097833
PERHAPS

>>3102172
This just made me want to finish my degree, get a job and cut off all my familial responsibilities just so I can help fund this as soon as possible.

>>3102172
RACE WAR!!!!!!!

>>3100698
BASED

are we booking Carter as world champion?

>>3102321
>Patronetty comes to the ring, first wrestler to be signed to ASP Wrestling (Autistic Seething Pro-wrestling)
>He unveils the BLACKED WHC Belt and cuts a scathing promo about how he's better than everyone in ASP
>Before he's about to leave the ring, Crybacks music hits
>Instead of 'Feed me more' it is 'Drew. no. Dimes'
>He runs towards Patronetty and spears him on the ramp
>Suddenly the lights go out and a hologram of Benoit appears near the Titantron, still pitch black apart from this.
>He goes into a promo about unfinished business and says his soul is going to embody his son and take care of it
>Kris Ben War (Benoit's sons ASP name) then appears and the lights come back on
>Commentary is going mental and the crowd is popping the biggest pop that ever happened as Kris runs towards Cryback and Patronetty and gets them both in the crossface
>Suddenly Undertakers gong sounds (Undercarder in ASP) and comes out in a wheel chair and proclaims he can't draw dimes as a wrestler so decided to take on the role of a GM and states the first match in ASP history is going to be a triple threat between Cryback, Patronetty and Kris Ben War for the BLACKED WHC.

How much do you think we'd need to make this happen?

>>3102736
Bout three fiddy

>>3102736
Would unironically watch

>>3102736
>Patronetty: $3,000 (+travel expenses)
>Cryback: $5,000 (+travel expenses)
>David Benoit: $700 (I'm sure he'd definitely do it for the money, considering he's probably green as goose shit and not wanna wrestle anyways)
>Video editor to edit together clips of what we want Benwah to say: $50-100
>55 inch TV (The /asp/ie Tron): $500
>shitty laptop just to play videos onto the TV: $30
>instead of Undertaker, we get NiggaTaker
>NiggaTaker: $200(at most)
>WHC replica: $300

>>3100800
>>3102172
Sounds good to me, I can legit see me winning the title/leading team asp as I am probably the closest thing this board has to an alpha male

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>Not booking ourselves

>>3102152
nah, nigga, we gon be so indy everyone is named storm

>>3103026
Carter will be our world champion and go over Cryback, Patronetty, and Benoitetty all in one night.

>>3100800
I live in the Tampa Bay area, best place to do it because of all the wrestlers that live here. We could get Hulk GOATgan to run in on all of our matches and give us the 'ol big boot brother.

>>3103048
Hogan has the gawker money now, he doesn't need us

>>3103050
Carter needs to go over Hoganetty

>>3099253
I would defend them if I didn't get a bot enter and post a link to one of their videos and leave in a dead as fuck literally who irc channel.

Shameless spamming shills.

>>3100800
Fuck yeah. Post your complete moveset and gimmick
Moveset-Throws
>big slam
>super slam
Aerial
>big splash
>super splash
>flying double axe handle into a big boot to the face
Strikes
>a cheeky closed-fist punch when the ref's distracted
>trading forearms/chops
>trading shitty hockey punches
Holds/Submissions/etc.
>arm bar
>arm drag
>Saskatchewan Spinning Nerve Hold
>arm bar
Finisher: Throw
>Rock Bottom, but to myself
Finisher: Submission
>diving headlock

>>3103937
I just spam rkos

>>3103937
Whoops, forgot my gimmick:
I'm called CT-EVIL and I give myself and my opponents concussions with stiff shoot headbutts (diving and otherwise), high-angle suplexes, and unprotected chair shots to the head. Theme is a vaporwave remix of Shibata's theme. I frequently stumble over my scripted promos, and often have to restart them multiple times. I plant myself on my head to sell a move whenever possible. Lariat? I'm landing on my head. Bakku Droppu? I'm landing on my head. Rake to the eyes/back? I'm landing on my fucking head.

>>3103937
My gimmick is being the most autistic chuuni mark wrestler in the world. I'll call myself Revanchist or something equally cringe and come out to MKaliez or some other anime song. I'll wear a mask and purple feathers for live shows, orange feathers for PPVs. I'll play a stormbird/firebird phoenix that's all dark and edgy, cutting Wyatt-esque promos while sitting naked on the roof of the bingo hall, talking about rising from the ashes and the cycles of resurrection, nothing of which makes any sense at all, and I'll do it all with the worst phony air of mystery I can muster.
I will then job in every match, but expect to be taken seriously because I am the bird of endless cycles.

Move set:
FUHRENACHT: dropkick into DDT in the corner, which won't really work because I'm a manlet.
IN YEARS TO COME: helicopter splash from the top rope, which I know in my heart I can't pull off.
THE END: swan dive from the top rope to the outside in which I land on my head and actually die.

I'm gonna waddle out to the ring and eat big macs

>>3104218
Hey Kevin

Would the crowd chant ding-dong diddly?

>>3103008
cringe

Championships:

World Autism Heavyweight Championship
Worked Into a Shoot Championship
World Dubs Team Championship
"""""""women's""""""" championship
Vanilla Midget Undercarder Championship

>>3103008
Have sex

>>3097833
Because WCPW turned out so well right?

>>3104252
It'd be Carter trying to start the chant all night long and failing to get more than a couple of other spergs to do it with him.

>>3106047
Poor Carter can't even make it into our jabroni fed. Can we bar him from entry like big poppa pump at the HoF?

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/asp/w

>Friday Night
>Main event
>Bingo hall goes dark
>Crowd in anticipation
>Feet I adore
>Based big guy comes out and shoots on his foot fetish
>Over as fuck
>Black out again
>Jimmy Fucking Ocean in the middle of the ring
>Pork faggots everywhere
>Big star meltz 7/5

>>3103046
Yelissa would be Carter's manager.

>>3106174
He's done it! Carter has won over Triphammer.. Listen to this ovation!

*2 people in shoney's parking lot clap"

>>3106174
Should we make her wear slutty outfits as a rib?

>>3106363
with pantyhose and exposing her pits? fuck yes

>>3103937
>gimmick
great lucha thing
>moveset
kicks and a botched headscissors takedown

>>3103937
I'll be a manlet hater even though I'm only 5'8'', the point is that I'm hypocritical. I'll refuse to leave the ground or go up on any ropes and just spam powerslams and suplexes and big boots. In big matches against Carter for the championship I can comically fail to execute my moves because I'm working outside my weight class.

>>3105969
>>3106023
manlets detected

>>3102736
Holy fuck I got worked to tears laughing at this. Book it Vince! (The name of the shady drug dealer we convinced to fund this)

>>3097833
We'll need to compete with WWE so we need our own tv shows, Monday Night SEETHING and Tuesday Night JACKED

>>3106350
Do you think Big Poppa Pump would rent us the parking lot to his Shoney's?

Can we do an angle where the Hosechads kidnap Yelissa and make her wear pantyhose?

No I don't want to associate with you outlaw shitters.

Gimmick: Mike the dog predator (MDP for short)
Theme:i wanna fuck a dog in the ass by blink182.
Basically I'm a tweener depending on if we're in the north or south. North I'm a heel that is hated cuz I rape dogs. South I'm a face that every fan in attendance can sympathize with for sexing animals.
Also notorious for molesting the referee to get a cheap dq
My finisher is 15 consecutive uninterrupted kicks to the balls.

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>>3110188
In the far north you would get fucking stone cold pops

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>>3106059
>Feet I adore

>>3106059

>Big guy shoots on foot fetish

Yeah so Vince actually found out about the foot thing, he wanted to work it into an angle where I run a train through the 'women's revolution'. He wanted to put the universal strap on me, and each night go out managing the girls. Each time they won I'd get down and kiss their feet and massage them. Sasha told me it's not her thing, I think she's got hairy feet or something, either way her foot game isn't as great as mine, but I was willing to for the strap and to main event mania. Any way, my demands worked Vince and you know the company is going down hill and he just couldn't afford me. His loss really.

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>>3106174
The Man of a Thousand Trips

let's book Rude Boy Riley