Cut a promo /asp/

>>2788345
YOU SEE ANON THE THING IS YOU JUST DON'T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES TO BE THE CHAMPION AND QUITE FRANKLY YOU'RE JUST A B+ PLAYER

AND AT THE END OF THE DAY I WILL BEAT YOU AT THE [PPV NAME] BECAUSE I'M JUST THAT DAMN GOOD

DAY IN DAY OUT I BEAT YOUR SORRY ASS AND WILL DO IT AGAIN

I've come here , in this ring to say that this is IT. I'm FED UP of being treated like an underdog for all these years, I'm FED UP OF all the times I've been mistreated, but now this will continue no more. I will prove to everyone in this damn business that you better take me seriously or else I'll knock your head off of your fricking neck! I am one of the best pro wrestler in this building right now and I don't care who is out there with more title wins than me, with more accolades than me, I seriously don't care. All I care for is that I'm the absolute best and I DON'T need a title to prove that.

First of all, I would like to say how great it is to be back... RIGHT HERE in /asp/!

*applause*

That's right, because the sooner I get here, the sooner I can get out of this pathetic excuse for a board!

You see, all you fat slobs do is get into heated debates over fake fighting shows made for children. I would be lying if I said that isn't the saddest thing I've ever heard. You know who else likes to debate childrens shows? /mlp/! But at least they can admit they're autists. You people don't even realize how pitiful you really are. I genuinely feel sorry for anyone that takes time out of their day to engage in discussion for a product that isn't even real, and isn't targeted for you anyways! Now excuse me as I go back to /fit/, a REAL board which we discuss how to improve ourselves, something that all of you should really look into before you end up with diabetes.

Have a bath, hit the gym, take a hint.

...
T-this is my yarrd, desu.

>>2788350

damn

>>2788345
LISTEN HERE MOTHERFUCK, FOR ONE I AM NOT A PINHEAD AND NO I AM NOT SEETHING. FUCK E-DRONES BUT ALSO FUCK NUKED JAPAN, I ONLY WATCH WRESTLING FROM QATAR AND IF YOU WATCH ANYTHING ELSE THEN YOU ARE A SEETHING MARK, YA PINHEAD.

hey /asp/ is this the goat promo?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=pEAyml3Fxgo

>>2788345
STARTING FROM THIS MOMENT ON, THIS'LL BE THE MOMENT OF THE GENESIS OF MCGILLICUTTY

>>2788655
Nope, this is
https://youtube.com/watch?v=_4yDVKidRqA

>>2788345
Listen here, [heel bad guy], I've been training my whole life for this moment...and I'm not going to let someone like you take it away from me! You talk about your brand, and the slogan that goes on your t-shirt, well let me you something. The last time we were at Sonic, doing a meet and greet, my line was around the block, and you were stuck with two guys eating corn dogs!

You can go on and on about how you don't care about the fans and you only do this for the money. That's because you can't do anything else, and you're a loser who doesn't have any fans. I do this because I love the WWE Universe. I am the WWE Universe. I got the WWE app just like everyone else here. These are my people. They love me because I'm the real deal. You're just a poser, pretending to be something you're not, which is a nobody. You see it every day when you look in the middle at that receding hairline, and slowly expanding waistline.

So after I beat you at this Sunday's PPV, that can only be seen on the network for 9.99, the roar of the crowd is going to be so deafening, Stephanie McMahon & Kurt Angle are going to have no choice but to make me the top guy around and you're gonna left holding my bags at the airport and begging to get the last seat on my private jet. Well guess what! That spot is reserved for the first ring rat who wants to hop on board the pleasure train known as Anon Freaking ymous! Now take your ding-dong didly seething ass the hell out of my ring, and go take a shower, hit the weight, and get a clue.

you're a poopoo head and I'm gonna kick your butt, ya dumb dumb.

The biological descendant of the xy chromosome, allow me to bequeath to you a life lesson. I'll let you know on prior notice that my intentions are not that of contempt, nor do I want to discountenance you; I hold no former grudges whatsoever. We all become versed in it eventually, admitting that you are getting acquainted to it a bit later than the rest of the multitude. But the fact of the Matter is: by and large, when a homo sapien, presumably living, utterly decimates the human being I'm speaking with respect to,in a bout of a blistering altercation, and the person in context to whom I'm speaking, can no longer ponder or think of a specifically logical counter argument, desperately fails to indict the arguer, it is of not only of utmost importance but also enormously recommended that instead of blabbering string of nonsensical characters and making it explicitly clear to the masses about your stupendously augmenting vehement regarding the same, you preserve your aperture from any more misuse and accept your vanquish gracefully like a true warrior. The varied aggregation will still be doubtable about your increasingly visible fury, unlikely to be contained, and the fact that your body liquids are scorching metaphorically in temperatures not humanly possible to attain, but, never the less, you will refuse, surrender, dissent and think over 10 times at least, before making your inner heat figuratively clearer as to stay miles away from further embarrassment.All things aside, young chap, you look like you are rather honourable and can adapt to situations swiftly, so I wholeheartedly hope this piece of advice supports your future endeavours and obstacles in life. Best of luck!

File: IMG_1273.jpg (125KB, 640x360px) Image search: [Google]

125KB, 640x360px

Listen here Enzo, we're in the LBGT capital of the world SAN FRANCISCO!

But I ain't no fag, but you got 2 options here, either you leave in a body bag...or you cram yourself up my ass like a human dildo while screaming "I'm Enzo amorgay".

OP you're nothing more than a FILTHY, DISGUSTING, BOTTOM FEEDING, CUM GUZZLING SLUT

>>2788345
WELL, YOU SEE OP, IN THIS BUSINESS...

>ASUKA IS A BIG UGLY PIG
*>Insert autistic scream*
>SHE FATO UGLY...
>Asuka's theme hit
>Asuka beat the living shit of that virgin hater

>>2789061
Cringe

>>2789061
These Big Cass ones are the best. How did the concentration camp one go again?

File: Enzo_Amore_3.jpg (312KB, 504x756px) Image search: [Google]

312KB, 504x756px

>>2789061
Cass stop trying to spit rhymes.

At the end of the day we both know you draw zero dimes

File: CM JUST.jpg (104KB, 640x1136px) Image search: [Google]

104KB, 640x1136px

you sit there, and post your memes

talk about "that face when"

well MY FACE WHEN NO GF

Welcome to /asp/ is yolo! And I am the new millennium for the Alternative Sports and Wrestling section. Now for those of you who don't know me, I am yolo, your new hero, your party host, and most importantly, the most charismastic showman to ever enter your living rooms via a television screen. And for those of you who DO know me, well, all hail the Ayatollah of Rock and Roll-a!
Now when you think of the new millennium, you think of an event so gigantic that it changes the course of history. You think of a dawning of a new era. In this case, the dawning of a new era on /asp/. Thank you, thank you. And a new era is what this once proud and profitable board sorely needs. What was once a captivating, trend-setting site has now deteriorated into a cliched, let's be honest, boring snoozefest that is in dire need of a knight in shining armor, and that's why I'm here. yolo has come to save /asp/!

>>2788345
HEY /ASP/

File: IMG_1266.jpg (271KB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

271KB, 1920x1080px

Cass let me break it down to ya like sour limes, once I bury you...you're still gonna be drawing ZERO DIMES

YOU KNOW... THEY SAY ALL MEN ARE CREATED EQUAL

>>2788345
[spoiler]__________[/spoiler]
[spoiler]______[/spoiler]
[spoiler]_____________[/spoiler]
[spoiler]This is my thread.[/spoiler]

YO I GOT THIS GUN! GIVE ME THE BELT!

>>2788345
HAVE SEX

>>2788623
that was terrible, don't say damn, i could shit out a better promo