RAW THREAD #5

pole

craig t nelson looks like shit

CEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

WTF happened to Dolph Lundgren

>>1111523
>>/SP/

>>1111596
He'll be fine

SHANE IS MJ LEVEL NIGGAH

Does Shane do like practice jumps in the preshow? Maybe on to a mattress?

KEK BASED BULLY RAY

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Based Bubba

"COME HERE TOUGH GUY! HA!? HA!?"

say what you want about him, but roman has that uppercut to kane levels of realism

>>1111622
He goes to his dads house and practices by jumping into a room full of cash.

>this awful segment

what the fuck this is worse than tna tier

Well that segment was fucking terrible.

>>1111650
NOW YOU GOT YOURSELF IN A PREDICAMENT

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>all those cheers

>>1111685

>awkward silence

yawn. it's another HHH jumps Roman and leaves him in a pile. Then of course we'll spend another five minutes on the other side of these commercials watching it again with mike's lame color commentary. yawn.

piss break i guess.

The most homoerotic segment on raw tonight.
> men in their 40's grunting as they pass a young man between them

Thats got to hurt getting thrown into a wall by Bubba Ray Dudley in Brooklyin,

JBL just threw some shade at Connor McManlet

>>1111791
>only Rusev and Barrett have their sleeves cut off
What did they mean by this?

I bet Ryback's breath has to smell like shit. He looks like the type of guy that never showers

>nice roid gut

<at bar
<bartender and me watching run acknowledge come out
<bartender asks if that is run acknowledge knock off
<he doesn't really wathink wrestinget
<I laugh hard

>>1111872
Shit didn't green text right. I'm drunk.

>>1111872
>>1111881
You should get your life together before coming back here

>>1111894
Probably so but I think most who come to 4chan should so... no typos this time either faggo.

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this raw sucks but my din din is delicious

>>1111523
Boring raw. I'm done for today.

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>>1111914

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AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA

Man is this show bad, more repetitive promos with Brock not saying shit.

>>1111921
lol, wtf?

brock's shrinking hair is making him look like a turnip

>bet Hot Rod girl is a Ambrose fan

>>1111921
FATTY SMARKS BTFO

PC BTFO

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PC BTFO
TRUMP 2016

Just...make it end

>Dr. Lesnar will see you now sir

ISRAEL SAVING MANDRAMA

>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS
>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS
>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS
>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS
>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS
>"POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS"
POLITICALLY INCORRECT WEAPONS

rate this Heyman promo

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>Doctor

>>1111921
>i...i..its ok. WWE is a kids show anyway

OK Roman.

>>1111962

10/10 as always

IT'S THE WACKY WAGON

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>Heyman literally, LITERALLY saying Bork is going to rape Ambrose at WM

Heyman is the Shawn Micahels to every other mic worker's Marty Janetty.

>>1111962
9/10 would hype again

>>1111962
Heyman/10

SPOILER ALERT: DEANETTY IS JOBBING AGAIN

>LE WACKY WAGON MAN

>>1111962

Dr. Brock Lesnar/10

The lunatic fridge, yawn

DEAN BRINGING HIS FUCKING MACHINE OUT FINALLY, RENEE TO TEST IT LIVEEEEEEEEEE ON MONDAY NIGHT RAW

>>1111962
4/10

>>1111921
Why did they have to point out the boo's are predominately male?

They think Reigns is an ugly woman or something?

>>1111962
Trump/10

>that fake-ass barbed wire

What does Lesnar have to gain from going over?

Billy & Chuck weren't a tenth as gay as that red wagon is.

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>no third ECW guy promo

BROCK DON'T GIVE A FUCK

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>dean

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHA DEAN IS SO WACKY

SOOOOOOOOOOOOO WACKY

>>1111982
>they

It's an interview with Roman, he's trying to rationalize why people hate him./

Does Brock ever not fucking corpse

>Dange-R-Us
HAHAHAHAHAHA NOT SCRIPTED

>>1111987
Still being a huge draw.

lesnar credibility would go down very hard if Ambrose defeats him.

>>1111989
What do you mean, Paulie Dangerous just talked dude.

>PEOPLE ACTUALLY DEFEND THIS WACKY MAN

Jesus Christ.

The segments tonight are worse than TNA tier.

What the literal fuck did I just watch?

Based fucking Ambrose

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>Lucille doing double duty on sunday
Bork and Duryl gonna die

remember when dean-o did this same thing during on of his rollins feuds?

Dean doing some MAcGyver shit this sunday

>>1111998

Fair point

This is worse than last raw. Wacky wagon man ambrose just leaves????? Fuck this.

THE LUNATIC CRINGE

>>1111987

>He thinks Deanetty losing to Brock means that he'll be losing

Are you new to wrestling? Lesnar isn't jobbing to Dean. You're literally nuts to think that even a possibility.

>>1111921
I always knew Roman was a passive aggressive tater tot in real life.

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BOOOOOOOOO

>>1111998
I dunno, I'd accept if Lesnar Lost if a Chainsaw sliced his intestines open.

So was the implication that Dean took the items that he received this week, put them under the ring - risking someone just picking them up and moving them, resulting in Dean losing them - and then Dean came out to collect them just to make a show of it? The absolute madman.

>>1112002
Shut the fuck up I liked it. It was a nice little step away from the boring shit that usually happens

Do you want another AS DA POPE Seth Rollins promo instead of Dean being wacky?

>the authority is gonna come out and "finish what they had to say"
fucking lol

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>ANOTHER AUTHORITY PROMO

>these busted ass hoes

Kek

DID THEY JUST SAY BASED EMMA WAS GOING TO BE ON RAW?

>>1112002

This

>>1112013
You're overreacting

Last raw was way worse

2 haitch promos in one night? What have we done to deserve this?

>Team Blonde
>Emma and Summer Rae
Another waste of Emma's talents.

> Paige
The poster child for crystal meth

Oh look, there is going to be another Authority segment. Another chance to fuck up and show how weak Ramen is coming into WM.

I'm going to take a shit. This raw is just cringe.

>Haitch segment
Oh boy
Roman getting his revenge
Hooray

>It's another Melissa Mccarthy movie

Can this morbidly obese unfunny cunt just get a cardiac arrest already?

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"THIS ISN'T WRESTLING!"

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>yfw Emma is on raw

>>1112020
Have you literally never watched wrestling?

Paige? More like pudge

>/sp/ getting BTFO

my dick is rock hard famalam

>>1112020
>implying WWE writing makes sense

That's a good one.

>>1112019
>Implying Brock wouldnt slice ambrose in half with his bare hands.

At most dean should be sold in that match as a guy that withstand huge ammounts of punishment.

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>BASED

>>1112028
But this is the WM go home raw. It should be much better

HBK is gonna be the ref for the Haitch-Ramen match

During a backstage segment Hunter told Steph to "call him"

I cant wait for Roman to screw the ending up and make himself look weak as fuck

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>>1112040

>Tfw no comfy Tuff enuff threads on /sp/

>>1112039
I was forced to watch Spy the other day and believe it or not it was a good movie. Actually might check this out.

Rare paige sighting

why isn't there a WM prediction thread up?

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>>1112053

I know anon.

Sara Lee such a QT, cannot wait until she appears on NXT.

>its another episode where nothing happens

First segment: 10/10
Jerifat vs gay community: 5/10
Divas: 2/10
Based social Outcasts: 10/10
Sandow sighting: 10/10
Rest of the Battle Royale segment: 1/10
HHH promo: 1/10
Rybotch vs Bacne: 3/10
Lesnar vs qackyman: 6/10


Pretty shit really

>Dean is a constant main eventer
>people still complain that he is being berried

m-muh strap

>Jimmy Fallon

Literally who?

E V I L E M M A
V
I
L
E
M
M
A

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>no Brieeeeeeeee Moooooode

> Nattie

>inb4 Emma steals the show

>>1112020
>throwing gifts from decorated predecessors under a ring

EMMA'S BACK

EMMA A CUTIE

Emma with glasses? Nice.

So Emma is back in the main roster?

>>1112064
>bacne
8/10

Why are they called "Divas" instead of "Women"?

>Emma will never give you a handjob with those tiny gloves

why even live

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>Evil Emma

>Paige

>From "savior of the division" to divas champ face of the division to multi-woman jobber match at mania

Dark Emma entrance.
Noice!

>Emma on TV

Wew

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New Emma theme? I really like it...

BAD and Blonde? More like BLACK and Blonde in Vince's mind.

BIG SEXY COOL EMMA

This remixed Emma theme is pretty gud.

>>1112054
Was it beach whale Rob Schneider or the supporting actors who made it a good movie?

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>It's a Lana takes off her shoes episode

Nice to see Emma back but fucking seriously another Total Diva vs everyone else match?

Is Bailey coming to Rasslemainia?

So the mystery partner is Neckbrace Bella, presumably?

I can't see it being Hulk Hogan.

Based Straya to BTFO England once again

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Paige

So Mandy is debuting at Wrestlemania?

DARK EMMA REPENT

>Paige vs Emma
We're about to witness a classic boys, take notes.

>Barefoot Lana
YES YES YESS

>Emma has been working on her tan

My dick is diamonds

>>1112070
>you will never see her shout "BREEEEEEEE MAOOOOOO" and flop around like a limp noodle ever again

Feels bad.

HOLLYWOOD EMMA

FEET
E
E
T

AUSTRALIA REPRESENT

Make us proud, love.

Emma and Zack Ryder in a relationship
Both suddenly back on the main roster.

I see a stupid feud coming soon.

>Pls god let the mystery partner be Bayley

9 Divas...

Only Emma actually plays the part well, not talking about her wrestling ability to her ability to actually act like a heel. She has had a lot of practice in NXT against Asuka, Bayley, and Carmella.

>Dean attacks Lesnar

/asp/: LOL XDD!1 WAT A LUNATIC!! HE'S SOOO CRAZY!!1 DEANTTY

>Dean doesn't attack Lesnar

/asp?: WHY DIDNT HE ATTACK BORK!?! LUNATIC CRINGE! SHIT TIER!!!111

WHO WILL BE THE 5TH DIVA????

is there a link to emma's remix theme? its pretty dope

>it's a neets on 4chin get aroused over feet edition

>>1112108
They better not.

>>1112110

Do you hate Bayley that much?

Last year had brock and roman playing tug o war with the title to end raw.

How can they top that?

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I want to eat cereal out of Emma's shitter

oh look. it's a shit diva segment. hey guys, you should do like i'm doing, watching MXC episodes. just downloaded all 5 seasons.

>vic romano approves of this

Why are girls so pretty?

>>1112119
Rybotch and Li'l Cara tug of war over the US belt

>>1112110
Probably Carmella. Or Eva Marie kek

THIS IS MOI HAOS NAO

>>1112119
5th person will be Trish, calling it now

i love Emma's music

Would paige look better with a tan?

She is literally spooky.

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>>1112123

Such a 4 year old question

>that finish

lmao

PAIGE

BTFO

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>Emma vs paige on Raw

IS THIS REAL LIFE

>Paige planting her hands on Emma's chest to do the fallaway slam

Worst fallaway I have ever seen.

>>1112107
Got to respect her keeping to her roots being a criminal and all

>>1112110
It's Crippleneck Bella mate.

Chyna when?

>>1112123
Because thousands of years ago your ancestors wanted some booty, and now you want booty

>>1112121

Would they be Booty-O's?

I'm no footfag. But shoeless Lana gets my dick hard as diamonds.

DARK EMMA WINS

>>1112132
>He doesn't like pale skin

>>1112114
Kaitlyn or Nikki

I want Emma to take a shit on my face

>>1112132
No. Pale is beautiful.

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That's what it is that seems different. I't Emma Omega.

MARKRNG OHT

MARKING OUT

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>>1112110
It's Total Divas so it's probably Eva Marie or, if they want to continue that shit from last year, Rhonda Rousey.

OH FUCK NO

IT GOT BETTER. BASED EVA

AHAHAHAHA

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>Eva Marie

Haha what

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>EVA MARIE

>Blonde bitch beating a BLACK QUEEN
DATS RACIST WE WUZ QUEENZ N SHEEEEIT

BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA BASED EVA

OH FUCK OFF

BOOOOOOOOOO!

FOR WHAT REASON

>upskirt shots of Lana
FUGGGGGGGG

LITERALLY WHO?

Holy shit this can only go hilarious

HAHAHAHAHAHHAH YES YES YES YES YES YES

Top kek hahaha
Eva fucking Marie

>>1112126
WIZARD

>>1112090
Well I won't lie and say the supporting cast didn't make the movie but she was actually funny in it as well.

lana is just fucking ridiculously hot with her hair like that

>this Eva Marie heat

holy shit

New York needs to have sex ASAP

>that huge boo.
Lol

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>EVA MARIE

>all bleh everything

>>1112156
welp

>>1112118
I just wanna see her constantly/regularly bro

>>1112126
You fucker

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KEK

>ALL THIS HEAT FOR BASED EVA

HAHAHAHAHAHA

B A S E D

A

S

E

D

>>1112126
>Or Eva Marie kek
WIZARD

YES!
save us Eva Marie

Eva Marie? Really? Why?

NO FUCKING WAY HAHAHAHAHAHA

Who let this whore out of her basement?

BEST RAW EVER

This was a weird segment.

do fans hate Eva Marie because she's a bad worker?

OH MY GOD WHY

Eva Marie!!!!

Eva >>>>>>> Roman
to be honest lads

HAHAHAHAH

EVA MARIE HATERS BTFO

>>1112194
Yes. She#s Kelly Kelly tier

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Some guy a few threads ago called this

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Ayyy lmao

>eva marie
LEL

Eva Marie made the show for me.

>>1112191
Sorry man i forgot to lock it this morning

>>1112194
And a bad actor

Golden Truth!

Wow the amount of balls to redebut her in ny, why in the world would you do that

>>1112194
She's awful

>>1112199
Kys

>it's a "two men in their 40's being in a sexless relationship" episode

>>1112199
She's hot, fuck that samoan fag.

>>1112139

As long as she doesn't manage LoL

>that pronounciation of Melbourne
>at least they didn't say Ossie

>Well they just ruined a good storyline...
Comment from Wrestling Inc
>Somebody was enjoying this

I thought Mix was injured?

Eva Marie and Roman need to be an Edge and Lita tier stable.

IMAGINE the heat.

Just imagine how hard fat smarks would get worked.

Live sex celebration literally every week to the sound of boos.

>>1112194
She's hilariously shit and bland at everything. She is slowly getting better at playing the heel in NXT tho.

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>Jasethy

and here we go with the six man tag.

just fuck my shit up nao

R-Truth think's he's punny huh?

>>1112211
Brooklyn especially.

Who the fuck thought it would be a good idea to bring out Eva Marie in fucking Brooklyn on the WM go home

R TRUTH

T
R
U
T
H

Ehh at least its on the kickoff

>trips shilling for Tap Out

It was fun while it lasted

>>1112211
Well they pretty much re-debutted 2 people but I honestly, Emma's theme alone makes me love her.

Based Goldust singing the Wrestlemania Rap

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Y17TmeyNKY

Well at least they finally got a decent looking female on the raw roster now. Eva marie makes me rock hard.

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Glad to see /sp/ is still a shithole.

They even allow sports betting generals there now.

Boy has that board sunk

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6-Man tag team match

Did someone get shots of Lana's feet?

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So what's going on with Cody Rhodes these days? Is he still Stardust?

>>1112222
Sweet digits

Im glad Emma is back

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>Based Sara Lee debuts as the 6th person

Divas wrestling is shit anyway, at least throw a real cutie into the mix

Eva. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

>>1112232
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

MANCHILDREN KEKED RIGHT BACK TO THIS SHITHOLE OF /ASP/

MANDRAMA PEDOS BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

STAY PUT IN YOUR KEK SHED FAGGOTS

C
U
C
K

S
H
E
D

Is Zack coming out after the 6-man tag match to be the last man standing again?

>5 on 5 Divas Tag Match
>Team Total Divas
>Paige
ok
>Brie
sure
>Nattie
good
>Alicia
alright
>????
I wonder who it could be. I doubt Rosa....maybe Nikki's comeback? Maybe Cameron will make a return since she used to be on Total Divas
>Its fucking Eva
Well....WWE reallys doesnt want Women's Wrestling to succeed

>team total divas
pretty obvious in retrospect desu

>>1112241

He is a serial rapist

>>1112246

>/sp/tard so butthurt he's on our board

Nice autism :^)

>>1112233

The sad thing is you don't even have a script doing this. You're literally manually doing it.

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BASED LADS

>>1112237
Can /KPG/ come here from /mu/ since /mu/ is as bad as /sp/ now?

>>1112237
Cry some more wrasslefag.

>Eva Marie comes back
>Firefox crashes right before it happens
10/10

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>post yfw we're fucking stuck here irregardless of being a sport, just because of some cp spamming faggots

>>1112241

He apparently will be stopping that gimmick soon

>>1112241
yeah he'll be in the IC match sunday

>>1112237
>being this bitter

I fucking love that you manchildren got your hopes up for being back on /sp/

>talking shit about a board when you are cucked to /asp/

>Eva Marie
Wait...she sounds familiar.

>>1112246

Autism is strong within you my friend

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>>1112258

I hate that legit talents like paige and emma are lumped in with those no-talents

>>1112256
>>1112262
At least we can have discussions here, your board is literally sports /vg/. A soleless shell of containment.

Stay autistic

>>1112254
oh kek

>>1112237
>who needs that board anyway
>/asp/ is way better
Being this assblasted.
kek
KEK
K E K

>>1112258
>irregardless
JUST

YFW Eva Marie will one day be divas champ?

>Official Wrestlmania theme is titled "Oh No"

FUCKING LEL

Broken neck Nikki would be better than fucking Eva

So what's the deal with all the hate to Eva Marie? She's the female Roman Reigns or what?

snoooooooooop

>Snoop Dogg

>>1112255
We're the only life force keeping this place alive, anyone can honestly post here and it wouldn't matter

>>1112268
>memes
>shit posting
>can't have generals

Yeah, real nice discussions.

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based eva working the smarks just by existing

>They waited all the way until they had a Raw on the East coast to announce Snoop Dogg?

>Sting

I forgot

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>spoop dawg

>>1112218
Get ready to hear JBL chant Ossiee Ossiee Ossie oi oi oi

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just let me enjoy my sports guys

>snoop dogg

The IWC will be inducted next

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>>1112273

>>1112276
She's legitimately really bad at wrestling.

So what's the deal with Golden Truth? Are they gonna be the number 1 contenders after Mania?


They've been doing promos for 2 months

>>1112276
No, Sasha is Roman. Eva is an uglier Kelly Kelly. Her push would result in the death of the division once again.

>Poop Dog

>>1112268
yeah is "this", 18+. have sex, and tripfags discussing waifus what you want

/wwe/ is literally a cuck shed that nobody posts in after 300 posts and it's all memes lol

>All those fat smarks cheering Fat Owens Fat

>Snoop Dogg
>Not Lemmy
Fuck WWE

>>1112292
It's fun and gives the 2 guys something to do.

>>1112254
:')

BASED FAT ASS

>We want Mizdow

Is the WM that Miz won the main event, really considered the worst modern WM?

CODY IS CUTE

CUUUUUUUUUUUUTE

>botch cara

Is there 30 mins left or an hour 30 mins?

>Gimp Cara

Sami "no pop" Zayn

>Snoop Dog instead of Lemmy or Based Cyndi Lauper

>>1112285
>jbl making convict jokes
>jbl acting like he cares about cricket

Kill me

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>Sami "No pop" Zayn

>>1112308
30 minutes

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>Sami Zzzzzzzz

>>1112308
30 minutes but it will feel like an hour 30mins

>Based Hat-wearing Zane

>No pop for le NXT Canadian man

>>1112308
45 mins

>>1112308
30 hours

WHY IS THERE A TERRORIST IN THE RING?

>>1112294
>No, Sasha is Roman
I'd say Brie is more Roman than anyone else

>>1112280
Wow, memes and shit posting on 4chan? How absurd

>>1112308
30 minutes officially, but it will most likely go over ~15 minutes

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Sami

Sami Zayn does nothing for me

I don't hate him or anything he's just kinda there

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>>1112281
Everytime

>>1112311
Finally truly coming up from NXT and isn't over with the main crowd yet what the fuck did you expect?

>>1112280
>cant have generals
>bad thing
Moot/mooks social engineering fucked you up so much that you can't even remember /sp/ and 4chan before 90% of threads were generals? Very sad! I will fix this.

>>1112243
I'll miss her squash matches on NXT. Dark Emma kills jobbers harder than pretty much anyone else. Dat curb stomp into the Muta Lock combination she does.

>>1112305

if we're all honest with ourselves, the confrontation with the rock and cenation was the real main event of that 'mania

>>1112329
fuck off faggot

>No Pop
eat shit smarks the akbar is over as fuck

>>1112310
>>1112307
No this is the new Sin Cara, who was Hunico. Old Sin Cara was an asshole who didnt learn English at got released

>Bring it ooooooooonnnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!

>>1112300
Totally this.

Is there any reasonable explanation?

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>Sami ZzZZzZZzzayn

A generic good guys vs bad guys match to end the go home RAW for Wrestlemania

Better or worse than tug of war?

>>1112241
Well, looks like they answered my question.

>>1112276
She's shite and was pushed hard despite having the skills of a celebrity cameo.

They are rescuing it by turning her heel and having her play up to the neckbeards in NXT, but she is still awful.

>>1112297
>discussing waifus
Speaking of which, these gamethreads haven't gotten an /a/ or /wwe/ waifu discussion today.

>>1112280
You just described every board

>>1112311
They did the ole chants though

is sami zayn a refugee?

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>3 on 3 in the last hour on RAW

>>1112314
>>1112316
>>1112319
>>1112330
>>1112341
You are literally the cancer killing WWE

Who /miz/ here?

Cody lost weight, he used to have a gut

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>authority promo is going to close out the show

The "ole" chant is more over than Zayn

>>1112305
Haitch vs Orton was shitty but the storyline was great.

Miz vs Cena didnt had anything good in it.

>>1111914
what the fuck is that

>>1112330
They've introduced him in the worst possible way to the main roster.

Just a reminder this is the go home show to wrestlemania lol