Why are deer so cute?

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i was out looking for mushrooms today and stumbled upon this little guy right in the middle of a patch of sweet tooths. took a few pics and was on my way.

>>2445943
sad. probably discarded by the mother or she was ran over by a car or a hunter got her.
probably eaten by some other animal by now.

>>2446362
Deer leave their fawns in a safe place while they go do deer things. Every year I find a couple tucked away on my porch or flowerbed, the mom comes back later for it.

They're not. They're shit.

>>2446551
Your shit

>>2445943
>pushes the scream button

>>2445943
i never realized how good that dappled-light camo is

I'd like deer more if they weren't trying to throw themselves under my car every single day

Fuck deer. Fuckers ate all my hostas.

>>2446812
don't feed wild animals you dolt

>>2447065
They'll be back next year, but that's not the point.
Try a motion light or leave a radio on at night. Only the real ballsy deer will still fuck with your stuff then.

Are Deers the best pets for non-casuals?

There's a natural spring that empties to the surface by my front yard, so there's always water flowing all year round. That said, I see whole families of deer at least once a week come down my steep hill of a backyard to get a drink.

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>>2445697
Post it

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>>2445697

the moment when she thought the left the stove on

>>2445943
It looks awfully tame

>>2447073
thank you

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>brushie brushie brushie

Why are they so easy to kill? The trick is to whistle when they run by. They stop running and look. Last hunting season I shot four deer, three doe and one buck. All one shot kills.

>>2448472
Because they're defenseless animals that can't even fight back you retard.

>>2448534
>defenseless
For prey, their defense are their heightened senses and speed.

>>2448534
>against hunting deer when theyre overpopulated and a general pest
Fucking leftists i swear to God

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The deer are a pain here. My little town even set up a special council to solve the problem, but all of the appointed members only show up to gossip and chow down on the taxpayers dime.

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>>2448534
They are incredibly difficult to stalk because they have very sensitive hearing and sense of smell. (but some hunters go the easy route using scents and sitting in a tree stand all day) They are also an introduced pest and does ecological damage in certain parts of the world, in some of these places they have no natural predators at all so humans NEED to step in and hunt them or else the ecology of the area goes to ruins.

inb4: but humans are an even bigger pest so therefore humans have no obligation to reduce further damage.

>>2448541
MY FEELINGS WAAAAAH. FACTS ARE TOO HARD.

-leftists

>>2448534
deer are deceptively strong and can easily kill a man

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What a magnificent creature

>>2448541
stop growing grass lawns then.

>>2448541
so are humans.

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>>2450405

Dude fuck deer

I've hit 3 of them in my car, they keep jumping out in front of me. I'm about to get a truck and put a bug ass bull bar on it

>>2450552
stop being such a shitty driver and pay attention to the road. deer are beautiful and sexy, stop killing them.

>>2450566
He propably wants to act cool, like he loves to kill animals with his car, but in reality hes just a shitty driver

>>2450552
>Fuck deer
Isn't that where this thread is going?

>>2450405
Why do animals like to lick their own asses? It can't taste good.

>>2450586
Not everyone can have a self-wiping horse ass

>>2450566
>>2450574

My commute goes through bumfuck Kentucky at night. There's no streetlights, and we've got probably close to a million of those dumbass animals. I'd shoot every goddamn one of them if I could lol

>>2447734
>Lyme disease intensifies

>>2451186
So just put a flea collar on it.

>>2451186

As if your dog or outdoor cat can't get that shit too

>>2448541
>someone likes animals and doesn't want you killing them
>REEEE LEFTISTS GET OUT!
This /pol/ thing has become a real problem.

>>2450028
The very idea that places have some sort of natural equilibrium that has to be protected (by humans of all creatures) is pretty silly desu.

It's a completely ideological stance.

>>2451262
>someone likes animals, but would rather see them die from starvation, illness, and vehicles because they use emotion instead of logic

They're just long dogs.

>>2451186
Keep your animal clean and you don't need to worry about ticks. Anon, he said non-casuals...

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Cute animals, but stupid and suicidal as fuck.
Drive anywhere with a high deer population and you'll grow to hate the stupid fuckers.

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>>2451263
>The very idea that places have some sort of natural equilibrium that has to be protected (by humans of all creatures) is pretty silly desu.
Protection of the environment is a practical stance, dumbass.

If human development has killed or driven out all the big scary animals on the higher rungs of the food chain, there's nothing in the ecosystem to control the spread of lower-tier consumers. If lower-tier consumers breed and eat too much, they'll run out of producers to eat, which deprives other lower-tier consumers of their food sources and everyone starves. With every plant that relies on animals to reproduce gone, the ecosystem's diversity suffers, making it susceptible to being destroyed outright by viruses, foreign pests, or soil degradation.

If the ecosystem is destroyed, then humans cannot get food from it, and it may cause issues with connected ecosystems. If those ecosystems are used by humans (for example, rivers that feed into human farms' water tables), then their livelihoods may be at stake and the economy suffers. If the economy suffers, everyone suffers.

>>2453165
It's a practical stance if you're some sort of bleeding heart humanist, I guess.

>>2453177
Or someone who eats fish, hunts for their own meat, or understands that farms exist.

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>>2453078

Or, you know, you could buy a pair of dear whistles for $5 and not kike-out about it.

>>2453442
>gullible enough to think these actually work

>>2446378
>>>2446362
>Deer leave their fawns in a safe place while they go do deer things.
What even are deer things?

>>2450574
Do you even live in an area deer are a problem? I've been driving past midnight after work and the dumbfucks will line up across both lanes then stare you down. I've never hit one because I just slam on the breaks and avoid it but it's a huge inconvenience to have huge fucking animals chilling in the road.

>>2453471
They just walk around all sultry wanting it. They're just basically weird elves.

>>2453471
Sipping dew off flowers, doing that startled ear thing, frolicking with butterflies, getting rubbed all over.

/k/ thinks deer are really REALLY cute

>>2453705
Yeah? Well /pol/ hates them because this one autistic German (redundant, I know) won't stop posting that same webm in the OP.

In fact the OP of this thread is probably the German deerfag from /pol/.

>>2453723
Yes but /pol/ is filled with communists and millennials and newfags. All of the oldfags left, so who cares what they think. The german deerfag is the best poster on this whole website.

>>2453723
I just want to make it clear that what I meant is /k/ posters like to capture and fuck deer

>>2447705
This picture kinda makes me sad.

>>2447705
I hope his job interview went well

>>2453785
he looks kinda frustrated so I guess it didn't

>>2453759
man, deer are cute but they don't look smart, like, at all
you can tell this is an animal that doesnt know many things just from looking at it.

>>2453847
Well what is it supposed to know?

>>2448541
>points out that animals are defenseless against fucking bullets going into their head
>REEEEEEE LIBERALS
Shut the fuck up you trump supporting autist. I'm a hunter, by the way, so fuck off. They only said that deer are defenseless, which is the truth. You pulled the rest out of your ass to make an argument. Animals can't fight back against fucking bullets -- if you know any deer that can fire a gun, i'd be very interested in hearing about them. Though deer ARE capable of killing and injuring people, compared to a hunter, all animals are almost completely defenseless and have no hope of winning. It is always an unfair fight unless you want to try and punch deer to death. There's no way you can spin it to argue that it's a fair fight because it isn't.

>>2450611
...do horse bums actually work this way?

>>2453924
I don't think so. Not any more than other animals, anyway. When most mammals poo, they prolapse their asshole a bit and then retract it when they're done. This way, the parts that touch shit stay inside, if that makes sense.

>>2453939
Do humans not do this?

>>2453924
The horse anus is a marvel of evolutionary biology.

Like most mammals, rhythmic contractions of the bowels move the feces up to the end of the gut to be expelled.

What sets the horse anus apart is the bafflingly complex autonomic contractive motion of 4 muscular rings which function like sphinctoral guillotine. As the feces is squeezed out, the rings expand and the outermost ring is retracted into an interior skinfold resembling the human foreskin, leaving an interstital tissue fold to open air.

The two inner rings then contract, and push apart, severing the horse feces cleanly, allowing to drop free as the outer ring folds back through the interstital flap, creating a intrinsic wiping motion with the fourth ring as it contracts back into the horses rectum.

This advanced biological mechanism is so effective that many industrial companies have copied Nature's design for self-cleaning viscus liquid dispensers housed within complex machinery.

>>2453952
You know to much information about this Anon, I assume your one of the anons that will argue about how butchering animals for meat is worse off then fucking them and how they grow to like being fucked.
Like that crazy ass thread on /tv/ earlier this week

>>2453920
My dad knew a guy, a university professor of philosophy I think and a Nam vet, who would go spend a couple weeks in the Rockies with nothing more than metal canteen and a knife and would just live off the land. He hunted a deer like a dropbear intending to kill it with the knife. He lost the knife in the fight after having stabbed the deer in the throat a bunch of times. He had to wrestle the poor thing to ground and pull the tubes out of its neck to kill it only to have a bear chase him up a tree and steal his kill.

>>2453952
Can we get some diagrams or webms illustrating this?

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>>2454049
I wanna live off the land like that. Too bad I never had any male role models to teach me.

>>2450024
Yeah that guy definitely looks like trouble.
Just lounging around and what not

>>2454041
What thread was that. Give me some key words to search the archive

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>>2453705
>>2453769
>>2453944
We do, it's just our modern toilets don't let us poo like were supposed to so we get covered in shit. If you've ever taken a shit in a woods, doing a full squat with your back against a tree, you'd know you don't need to wipe. It's like a magic trick, your asshole comes out of it clean as a whistle.

>>2447834
Fawns stay safe by curling up in some brush and being very calm and still for as long as possible when mom is away.

My gf is scared of deer. I'm gonna make her read this entire thread. I will probably be single in a few minutes

>>2454041
Does anyone actually argue that? All I hear is "we raise animals in concentration camp tier conditions just to slaughter them in extremely painful ways so we can eat meat we don't even need to survive, but if you consensually fuck a horse then you're the bad guy". The argument doesn't hinge on "the lesser of two evils isn't evil", but "animals can consent, to sex, but not death, so why is killing ok but fucking isn't", which is far more rational. The problem is: We have no third party evidence that animals can consent to sex with a human. All we have is anecdotes from animal fuckers, and people who hate the animal fuckers.

>>2454862

This thread is crap. There used to be really awesome deer threads on /an/ in the past.

>>2454041
Nah mate I just browse /tg/.

>>2454862
How much of a pussy does someone have to be to be afraid of a deer?

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>>2454968
some people are even scared somewhere on earth a duck could be watching them

>>2454973
Is this like that Maury episode where the guy is afraid of balloons? I know these phobias exist but it doesn't make them any less stupid.

>>2454973
Far Side reference? well played

>>2447073
why not?