Just how powerful is the Canada goose?

>>2317064
1 trillion lions vs. canada goose

who wins?

Strong. I raised one from a baby and I was trying to restrain it and it smashed the back of my head with the hard bony part of its wing and it was pretty owie. Not quite as bad as the swans, but I would not want to be on the receiving end of a goose who knew how to use his weaponry.

>>2317070
no contest. goose

>>2317070
Humanity

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>>2317064
Canada stronk

>>2317070
The goose wins, but only because all the lions flee.

>>2317064
Compared to an 06 Chevy truck, not very strong at all.
>guess how I know

my 10 lb dog went after a flock of them once and had never so much as looked at a bird since

Goose is mostly bluster and talk. I've seen geese fight before. It's a whole lot of flapping and some nipping at feathers. No injuries actually sustained.

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>>2317197
Injuries aren't of the body, but of the mind.

>>2317194
good. I like dogs, but many small dogs are full of shit because no one ever puts them in their place

>>2317064
Probably more powerful than the Canadian military.

Canada geese are the niggers of the bird world.

>>2318144
no they are just too alpha for you to handle

>>2317064
The Man has conspired to keep the lowly goose powerless, so she has no power now. I'm starting a Change.org petition so we can enfranchise them. I have a dream that one day a goose may become a President.

>it's a God!
>it's an Emporer!
>No! It's a Goose!

>>2317064
Fact: Canadian Geese are the most powerful bird in the world.

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>>2317258
That shit looked creepy as fuck.

Imagine that thing calling to oddly and unnaturally in such an aggressive manner from a long distance(gif. Likely at the end of the end)?

>>2317258
notice how it goes right for the dick

>>2317064
Two rules to fighting Canada Geese:

A) They invariably go for your face.
B) As a farmhand I knew once said, "A broomstick across the chest takes the starch right out of them."

Assuming you're fighting a single goose, wait for it to go for your throat, hit it with a slash to the neck or front of its body. Any angle works, but you're probably better off with just a horizontal swipe, which can be used to redirect the charging goose if smacking the piss out of it isn't enough.

You can try kicking it, but it's probably just gonna fly over your leg, because of point A. If it hasn't starting flying yet, a good downward strike from anything long and vaguely stick-like will fuck them up proper, too.

>>2320276
It should also be noted that Swans, behaviorally, are identical to Geese. Maybe a little more defensive rather than aggressive.

A farm I used to work at did lots of events, hosted private parties, etc (same place I met the farmhand who taught me to fight geese) and had swans. They didn't keep them or anything- the swans just lived in the ponds around the farm. Over the years, I guess this gentleman's agreement came around, and now these Swans just hang around the property, chill in the yard. Swan and farmer have learned to work around one another, pretty much.

There's been more than a few instances of retarded suburbanites letting their kids run up to the swans to take a picture or feed them or some shit. Shit never gets old.

Also, those swans really liked to drown ducks. They'd just grab them if they got too close and hold them underwater, looking calm as fuck the entire time.

>>2317064
They took down US Airways Flight 1549. Too bad humans retaliated and literally gassed the geese

>>2320217
how does it even know...

>>2317258
>Terribleperson.gif
>Seeing doggo get approached by creepy prehistoric raptor and doing nothing
>Seeing doggo get bitten and spooked by creepy prehistoric raptor and doing nothing
>Not responding to either of these events by walking over, pinning the duck's body to the ground with the foot and pulling on its head in the opposite direction with your hands.

Is it good to eat?

I remember hearing about some gadget a guy put together, that were basically giant garden shears, with a little wire "carrot on a stick" type contraption attached to the handles. Geese walk up, stretch their necks up between the blades to grab at the "carrot", slam shears shut instantly ded goose. They said you could just keep doing it over and over again because the geese were incapable of learning.

>>2317064
Beyond getting bit, is there any real consequences for beating the shit out of these fucking things if they act all cunty? Seriously, if you are walking through the park and 1 of these fuckers shows up to ruin your day, can't you just grap it by its neck, swing it, and through it into the lake?

>>2320627

You afraid of the Geese Poleese or somethin?

>>2320289

>Birdstrike is literally more of a danger to air travel than terrorism
>Look at all the xenophobic shit people do out of fear of terrorists
>But yeah, just like a falconer with a dog at the airport will do...

I hate these fucking birds. They were once endangered and now they are an overpopulated menace. Not only to humans but to the ecosystem. I lived along a river most my life and they trample down the marshland and prairie restoration projects, drive other birds away and destroy their nests, and produce such a mountain of shit that it contaminates the shallow water.

I get so mad when I see fuckers feeding them in the park. But I hope maybe the bread makes their stomachs explode?

>>2320662
feed em bread with rat poison once a week. nobody will ever know.

>>2320627
>>2320662
>>2320818
enjoy getting busted by the feds for violating the migratory bird treaty

>>2320662
>using the term xenophobic unironically

turn of your pc forever and kys please

>>2320833

lern two reeding comprehensun

I never said I had, was, or would do anything, I said I hope that the people in the park feeding them bread are unwittingly culling them.

>>2320844

>thinking xenophobic is some newfangled buzzword

Right back at'cha.

>>2320627
Why would you? It's not like if they're an actual threat.

>>2320552
Nature is brutal sometimes, live with it.

>>2320662
>muslims have been enslaving and raping africans, europeans, and asians for hundreds of years
>USA has been fighting muslim jihadists since the 1700s
>omg xenophobia be nice

>>2321063
How's nature when the dog is leashed?

>>2321196
Humans are animals to your an idiot?

fighting big mentally retarded birds that start to follow you around is like picking nettles. You just gotta be firm and quick. Grab it pretty much anywhere and it cant do shit to you. or just kick them hard until they stop following or break something

>>2317258
what in the fuck...

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>>2317064
This webm pisses me off so much

I fucking hate geese. They're such presumptuous assholes. I remember my first encounter with one as a child. I was feeding ducks at a lake, multiple species. They were all sharing nicely. Abruptly, a Candian goose appears and chases everyone off. It charges at me, honking. It's even taller than me, as I was a small child and it honks in my face demanding food. I see its teeth. I back up. It follows.

Fucking jackass goose. Can't believe things that are several times my size are afraid of these damn geese. And the geese seem to know it as they don't even try to dodge.

>>2320627
Migratory birds are federally protected.

Unless you get a license to hunt them in season, then the feds can slam you for fucking shit up instead of just leaving it alone.

>>2320217
I'm actually cringing after noticing that