People keep telling me that I'm pretty cocky and judgemental

Going for lower marks is stupid. How do you shit on others, like what behavior?

>>18730829
For example, I posted my exam results online which I was pretty proud of because I worked hard for them, and one of my friends messaged me saying that I'm being like one of 'those cunts who just posts their results on social media to rub it in to others' so I took it down.
Another time, me and my friends were on Tinder and looking at what colleges people went to, and I basically sniggered at any there were shit colleges with shit majors. My friend pulled a pretty offended expression so I felt bad then too.
Whenever I'm talking to my friends about girls we see I pretty much always dismiss them as hoes or uninteresting because of the way they dress, walk, talk or whatever, and everyone always says I'm going to die alone if I'm this judgemental, and then I say I'm never going to settle because settling is stupid

These are just some examples

>>18730850
You must be either on the spectrum, or just an asshole. I'm not saying that to be rude, but that really is what that behaviour says about you, especially when you consider the fact that you don't realise how it comes across and need someone else to tell you that you shouldn't be doing it.

>>18730850
First example is pretty clear. For the two others, what are your thoughts like before saying it? Do you think about how the other might feel?

You're too vocal with your preference and judegements. Learn to keep it to yourself most of times, man.
Nothing wrong with being judgemental everyone has bit of that inside them, it's problem when you go around and voicing your unwanted opinions like tat most of times.

As for your exams result, I'm 50/50 on that, nothing wrong with being proud with your achievemen, but perhaps along with that you're also posted a condescending comments to others.

>>18730854
I imagine I'm not on the spectrum, so maybe I am an asshole. Is there any way to change that?
>>18730859
I don't really think about it, it's sort of like a reflex. When I look at girls I just usually assume that because they're wearing the same old skinny jeans, Stan Smiths and have loud voices that they're probably just annoying and I wouldn't get on with them. I usually feel like I won't get on with anyone.
>>18730863
So what am I meant to say? If I just keep silent I will be the person who never contributes anything and would be invisible!

>>18730887
>I don't really think about it, it's sort of like a reflex.
I mean what you think before you say those things out loud. If you really are just vomiting up the words without thinking about how others feel might feel about it, you're probably on the spectrum.

>So what am I meant to say?
Something nice or just ask questions. And no mean questions. If someone goes to a shit college to do a shit major, I'm not going to shit on their choice. I'm going to ask why they decided to go there and what they hope to achieve by doing that major. No judging, just taking an interest. Who knows, maybe they actually have great reasons you haven't been able to come up with because you think you know better.

>>18730898
Whenever I try to say those things, it always comes off as condescending so I look like a dick anyway

>>18730813
I feel you. I used to get that tag, too.

In my case when i was younger i was made to feel inferior a lot so if i had any accomplishment at all that i perceived as something normal capable people could do i was proud af. So id be boasty and even though my aim was "look guise im as good as you" it was perceived as "im better than all of you."

I learned people just plain dont like to hear you boost yourself up. Humility is valued.

I eventually learned as well that if you keep quiet about your accomplishments and let people learn about it themselves, they will perceive you as well made and distinguished without thinking youre a douche. Much greater effect.


I understand youre proud of yourself, i understand you want to share it and share your happiness with others, and there is nothing at all wrong with that, but keep it to yourself.

You just have to stop yourself a few times and eventually that kink will work itself out of your personality.

>>18730974
Nah, you're just a hater. Plain & Simple. I'm the best thing that ever happened to you guys you just don't know it yet. It'll sink in eventually. Next week, next month, next year. Oh, it'll hit you alright

>>18731007
I don't get it

>>18731014
You never have

>>18730813
You don't have to be fake to fit in. Keep working hard. Just try to remember that not one of those people is different from you. They all have the same feelings, they have all gone through hard times like you have. Everyone has faults that they try to deal with every day. Just think every stranger is a friend you haven't met yet or a long lost family member. Try to see the things you lime in each person you meet. God makes the sun shine and the rain fall on the just and the unjust alike. Let your love fall on the deserving and also the undeserving. I try to keep a relationship with him through Christ, especially in those hard times when I struggle to do right.

>>18730813

You can't change your thoughts and impulses but you can change how you react and deal with them.
You can say the same thing but in a different tone and it can make the difference between people laughing about it or resenting you for it.
Nobody likes to be told they're not good enough or have their flaws pointed out. But you also can't go around masking your true feelings and pretending everything's butter. That's serial killer shit.
So learn how to express yourself better by not changing what you want to say, just re-framing it so it's not seen as an attack on brag.
And only open your mouth when you really feel like you NEED to say something in these cases. If someone says they like X and you don't, that's not grounds for intervening or acting snide. You gain nothing by doing that other than an ego stroke.

And if you find that you keep hurting yourself in social interaction keep your mouth shut more in general and just listen. Maybe you're not as great as you might think.