She flaked...

Don't hold your breath that this is going to go anywhere

I'm not an expert at this but if she is still talking a lot to you, she might have just not wanted to go out in the rain.

I think the best way to respond to this has nothing to do with decreasing response time. Instead keep talking normally and be chill. Wait a bit and hit her up again casually for another date. Make sure your intentions are clear again and if she bails on that one then defenitly give up.

I mean would it really hurt you to ask one more time? If you have the confidence to ask the first time, then I think you will be fine asking the second.

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>>18727474
Any particular thing which makes you think that?
I am torn about giving her the benefit of the doubt.

>>18727484
It isn't about courage, but about what is more advantageous.
Decreasing response time is obviously to send her the signal it's her turn to act.

I prefer not to be the one hitting her up - she is the one who flaked.

>>18727493
>Any particular thing which makes you think that?
>I am torn about giving her the benefit of the doubt.
This whole situation to me feels like she's trying to let you down gently. She doesn't want to date you, but she wants to remain friends. If she wanted to date you, she'd have offered an alternative date already.

>>18727493
>>18727497
Oh, and the whole 'I get sick easily' thing reeks of bullshit. Does she expect to live her life avoiding rain completely or something?

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>>18727497
>>18727501
This is also partially my thinking.
-
>she's a hiker (afraid of rain wtf)
>on my end the rainstorm was not ideal but not earthshattering. (I could have taken out the garbage)

+
>I don't know the chick well. Only met her IRL twice. Why would you want to insist on a friendship if you aren't interested? (makes no sense to me)
>her enthusiasm and hits are come in quite strong (strong for a casual friendship - she sent me this)

This is an odd situation I am in. I have dealt with flakes before, but not one this unclear.

>>18727512
She sent me this a few hours before the planned date.
>nervousness and shit

>>18727469

Sounds pretty legit to me... Also people dont like driving in heavy rain.

>>18727493
The messages put a lot into context. It does feel a bit bullshitty of a reason. I understand why you would want to decrease response time and the more I think about it, if dating is your primary goal and overtakes just fostering a friendly relationship, then you made a good choice.

I agree with
>>18727497
In that she probably wants to let you down gently

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>>18727469
>to contact ME when she is OK again

>She starts contacting you signaling she's OK

>You don't make another move and get cold

>She hasn't come forward with an alternative date
>>18727493
>Do you have by any chance time next week?

You're making this difficult for her senpai. Ask her out again instead of playing these goddamn mental gymnastics. If she fucks up this second shot then you have all the proof you need to close the book on her.

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>>18727517
This would have been a legit reason.
But she didn't use this. She said she was 'afraid to get ill'

>>18727518
>ask out to sushi
>at 7pm
>her agreeing to park her car at my place and then take a bike ride to restaurant
I think this is fairly clear cut in terms of my intentions and it being a date.

She could have blown me off before agreeing. See pic.

>friendly relationship
This, but as I said, the she is coming across as a bit too strong for a casual friendship.
She is still 'spamming' (couldn't think of a slightly weaker word)me with pics and updates as we speak.

>>18727528
Am I though? To my knowledge I am just using 'The Game 101' rules here.
One doesn't want to come across as needy now.

>>18727536
Dude, all the over thinking and mental gymnastics you're doing here is pathetic as fuck
I always thought over-analyzing petty shit like that is what stupid bitches do, not men
Man up and either ask her out again or just cut the contact and move on. Nigga, this is no quantum physics

>>18727528
Also even after canning it it's worth noting that she immediately asked for another day. That makes it TWICE she asked to keep the date.

T W I C E

Like faggot, come on. Stop being afraid.

>>18727536
I don't know shit about that book but yes you definitely are making it difficult. Hell, if you've been reading what I am assuming is a relationship help book though then you should know that girls don't like to be direct,you have to READ them. And you aren't reading her you're getting afraid and acting bitter.

Fuck, you really shouldn't be trying to stamp out girls when they flake. That shit happens,give them another shot if they at least keep trying to engage you but if they don't then sure. You have a bonified time waster on your hands.

>>18727493

damn OP first mistake is talking to her through texts. Secondly what kind of nigger are you to send her 3 texts in a row. Are you fucking 14?

>>18727557
>if they don't then sure. You have a bonified time waster on your hands.

rather I mean

>if they don't try to communicate with you or don't show on that other shot then sure. You have a bonified time waster on your hands

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>>18727540
>>18727557
Never read it in a book or anything. This is just my usual MO. NEVER seem clingy in any way. Just this time in a bind because cutting off is not a viable option.

>you really shouldn't be trying to stamp out girls when they flake
I try not to, shit happens. It is more her weak and implausible reasoning which keeping me back.
As a hiker the 'I get ill for a bit of rain' stick from her is just ridiculous.

But it's interesting you guys are pointing out her general interest might still be there and she is not flaking due to friendzoning.

The thing is don't have a use for a platonic female friend. And I'll not pursue if this is where it's going.

>>18727568
She's still writing. Her message from this morning.
(Had a headache yesterday hence the question)

>>18727588
If she's texting you this much, as long as you make a move to establish that you want to get intimate(EX: A kiss on the mouth) I don't think you have to worry about getting Friendzoned.

At the same time though she is texting you TOO much. Act busy and shut her down more. Being a texting buddy to a girl you want to be personally involved with is annoying and when you are physically around each other you have little to really talk about.

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>>18727696
I am definitely shutting her down, only replying every few hours at the most.

>little to talk about.
This has also been odd about this case. We have met 3 times during class and after class we usually at stand around a bit and chat for like 5 min, but IRL she doesn't exhibit anything 'special' (no 'signs' or obvious attraction). Maybe an off smile or two. It feels like a short exchange between classmates.
But as soon as I go, she starts texting all the time, full emoji canon, etc.

>>18727469
She met another guy.
Women string multiple guys along, particularly if the girl is good-looking.
They wait for the best one, and generally it's the first one to attack and make a definitive move.
Sorry my man, you're in the backseat on this one.

>>18727860
I personally think that's rather improbable, anon. If so, the frequency of her messaging would have deinitely dropped, which didn't happen

>>18728280
>the frequency of her messaging would have deinitely dropped

nah, it's pretty easy to message multiple targets and carry on parallel plots

>>18728374
Well...that is also an option. :/
This getting a but much in terms of option.

Anymore opinion? Getting very mixed advice here.
Thanks.

>>18727469
Most females are trash. Go MGTOW.

>>18729348
Ghost her. The anons ITT are poisonous females looking to spike their fangs into you and suck your souls, unfortunately.

>>18727469
It could be that she's flaking because she's not interested in you and she only said she'd go out with you to not hurt your feelings.

Or she could actually be sick. I've cancelled on people last minute due to being sick (shitty, I know), but it happens. Just not a lot.

Either way, you won't know for now. You'll have to gauge her reaction when you see her next. If she doesn't want to talk to you, she doesn't like you. If she agrees to go out with you again but flakes, she doesn't like you. If you go out with her and she makes an effort to get to know you and have a good time, she probably likes you.

No sure way to tell now though. Just relax and go do something else lol

>convoluting this shit this much
>not saying "no worries, let me know when you feel better" and leaving it at that.
>not having like 5 or 6 other girls lined up ready to take to pound town

>>18729348
Ghost, but if you see her in person be polite but aloof. She doesn't have her shit sorted out.

>>18727469
Yeah just ghost her. Don't let her get too comfortable with you. Right now it kinda sounds it you're just a texting buddy.

>She hasn't come forward with alternative date. She still interested?

Nope, its that simple. Take a look at the gymnastics people can preform with their schedules for work and friends. If she wanted to she would

>>18729895
>>18729958
>>18730365
I'd usually ghost, but it just doesn't make sense for me to create 'tension' with someone I still have to work with on regular basis.

>>18729883
So her or me making the next step? Next possible date.