How many previous sex partners before it becomes excessive?

>>18719265
One.

>>18719265
Desu, if your marriage partner isn't your first, you're more likely to divorce

>>18719265
If you have to make this thread, you already know it's too many

>>18719265
No number is too high. STD's are the only thing that = excessive

>>18719299
This. Just because shes fucked 1,000,000 men doesn't mean shes a slut.

>>18719265
Girl or guy? I'm a mid 20s male and I've had 6

>>18719265
I personally found 1 to be too excessive for a woman. Sex, contrary to what this modern world that casualizes it, is still a intimate and deeply investing activity especially for a woman.

When a woman have sex, she invest her whole being. Too much investment or sex would make her think low of each and thus make likely to be not loyal.

For men, it might sound like a bias but it's as much as he could afford it, it'll never be too excessive. Men built differently than women. I don't say men should go around fucking happily, I mean polygamy is fine since men get to have lots of partner while taking care of them at same time.

>>18719312
> Just because shes fucked 1,000,000 men doesn't mean shes a slut.
What the fuck?
Is this bait?
>>18719318
>polygamy is fine
That's where you're wrong, kiddo.

one every 5 years of your life starting from 10 yo

>>18719325
closed polygamy is what nature intended, anon

>>18719348
So is caving in your sexual rival's skull with a rock.
We're talking about how to maintain a stable civilized society.
>inbfmuhfagtrannyqueershitrights
Not conducive to stable society. Sexual degeneracy is one of the most damaging things to allow.

>>18719357
>So is caving in your sexual rival's skull with a rock.

nailed it

>>18719475
>5
What the shit. No.

>>18719482
5. You fucking slut.

Three is where it gets iffy for me

You are asking on 4chan, the place where everryone is in love with "pure anime girls", they believe a touched woman is inpure, will cheat on them and its a sin.

I would accept 30 if I really loved her and I'm a teenage dirtbag virgin

>>18719552
This. Wrong place to ask, OP

>>18719552
>>18719565
Seconded/thirded. Lots of people on 4chan struggle to realize that relationships are more about how your partner treats you and makes you feel and less about their body count

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>>18719265

sorry if this is hijacking but I have nobody else to turn to and I don't want to start my own thread

My current girlfriend (my first, actually) has been with 3 guys and 2 girls (one girl was a one-night stand, she "really cares" about that girl). I've recently started prying and her explanation was that we see sex differently and I was raised with stronger morals than her. I can't get over it and it's tearing me apart, she says I will eventually leave her over it but I don't think I can. I know I will regret it, and I can't change her past, but I still feel like it shouldn't be that high.

The first was a guy that was abusive and took advantage of her. The next two were guys who she was in relationships with at the time. She says they never had much sex ("I can count the amount of times we had sex on one hand"). She has never even kissed someone who she wasn't in a relationship with (except for that one girl I guess).

I brought up that we have practically incompatible morals/ideas when it comes to sex, but she immediately thought I was breaking up with her. I'll admit I was close to it but I still don't want to leave her. Does it (sex partner count) matter? Am I just stuck in the past? Is it even possible to find a girl who has a body count less than 3 nowadays who's not a sheltered religious freak? How do I come to terms with my girl's sexual history?

>>18719582
Why is 3 the magic number for you? Why is 2 acceptable but not 3?

Also, it's not really that you have stronger morals than her. You just have different ideas on sex. You have to decide if those differences are big enough to end the relationship. Some people can work through their differences, some can't. Neither one is wrong. Everyone's got their dealbreakers.

>>18719582
>she says I will eventually leave her over
sorry m8, but this is happening
if she says that its because she wants you to forget her.

Just see this way, Sex partners doesnt matter if you really love her

Both the people who think that you should only search for virgins and the people who think it's just a silly number that doesn't matter are wrong opposites and certainly very inexperienced themselves.

Real life isn't like in romantic comedy movies where people just casually happen to fall in love with each other and after going through some wacky stuff they live happily ever after. Relationships change, unpredictable things happen, circumstances in life differ, not everything in life will go the way you want or have a good ending. It's ok if a girl has had a few relationships that didn't work out, it doesn't mean she's promiscuous and doesn't mean she won't ever be able to truly love you, and that thing about the "first one" being the most memorable is one of the biggest lies ever and i sincerely don't understand why this is still a thing, probably because this is what virgins fantasize about.
On the other hand, it is NOT just a silly little number. If somebody, whether male or female, has had a considerably high number of partners for his/her age, you have every right to be wary of that person as a partner, because it's a signal that this person possibly doesn't know what he/she wants or isn't very good at choosing partners, makes poor life choices, doesn't truly want commitment or is simply promiscuous and more likely to get bored of you/cheat.

Things aren't as black and white as people in 4chan make them out to be, specially when it involves humans and even more specially when it's about relationships. Judge things individually and don't be afraid to live.

>>18719591
>>18719595

I don't think I'll leave her over it. I just want some way of coping with it but I realize it's internal. Is it really as easy as just 'getting over it'? If I really love her I will accept it obviously but I don't know how to start.

>>18719608
I think it helps to realize that her sexual history doesn't affect her ability to be a loving, kind partner to you. Just because she's had sex before you doesn't mean sex is meaningless to her. It also doesn't mean she's more likely to cheat on you--I've seen plenty of stories of people who saved their virginity only to discover they now had a fear of missing out on other partners, and they cheated as a result. The point is that someone's worth or ability to love you isn't affected by shit like their sexual past. I think it would help for you to figure out what exactly about her past bothers you, and then share that with her. That way, both of you can figure out exactly how she can give you the reassurance you need to combat your specific insecurities

>>18719619

>what exactly about her past bothers you

what exactly bothers me is how high that Number is. And I told her this, but she says there's nothing she can do about it. So it's up to me to get over it. Thank you for understanding the point of my post, to ask for help in coming to terms with it and changing my viewpoint rather than just break up with her. I want to stay with her and make things work.

>>18719632
But why does that number bother you? Why does it matter that, in your point of view, she's slept with so many other people? You gotta go deeper than "she's had dicks inside her dude!" because I know your shit goes deeper.

Here are possibilities of deeper shit you're feeling:
- because she's had (in your eyes) so much sex, she must not feel sex, or at least sex with me, is special
- because she's had other partners, she will be thinking of them every time we fuck
- because she's had other partners, she will cheat on me
- because she's had other partners, I will never know if I'm the best sex she's ever had
- because she's had other partners, she will never be able to truly love me and truly be bonded to me
- because she's had other partners, she is a gross human being who has other questionable morals and will eventually hurt me in some way

It's admirable that you want to make things work. She needs to realize that while she can't change her past, she can do something about it: she can reassure you (so long as you voice the fears and insecurities that her sexual past brings up). She can't really give you the reassurance that you need until you tell her what you need from her. After you tell her, then it's up to both of you to keep each other feeling secure. And when you do need reassurance, it's important for her to realize that it's like maintenance work for the relationship instead of repairing, if that makes sense. Like when I tell my bf I need reassurance, it's not because I'm thinking he actually likes that girl he smiled at. I just need a quick reminder that I'm his priority, that the love is still there, that I'm special despite the smile

>>18719265
1

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>>18719582
>bisexual
Should have dropped her right there

>>18719690
you see how its always the girl that has to stay a virgin?

>>18719706
Master key
Shitty lock

>>18719337
>starting from 10 years old

why wait?

>>18719325
obviously

>>18719690
more importantly..if you're at 6, get yourself to 11, better odds there!

i'm 32 and have been with 4 people consensually..but technically 5

>>18719709
wouldnt this apply the same for boys?
I mean, boys being the shitty lock

>>18719727
Only if they're bottoms

>>18719706

So you think it's bad when women mock male virgins?

Yeah I didn't think so.

>>18719767
>So you think it's bad when women mock male virgins?
actually yes, it doesnt matter the gender, people can do what the fuck they want

>>18719782

Oh, I thought you were a woman. Turns out you're just a white knight.

>>18719787
Not who you responded to, but why do you feel it's impossible for a woman to have an issue with other women mocking male virgins?

depends on age.

18 = more than 2 is disgusting
20 = more than 3 is disgusting
25 = more than 3 is still disgusting get your life together
30 = 4-5 is acceptable but really just fucking settle down man.

>>18719659

She tells me that when we have sex it's different. She can't explain it but it feels different compared to everyone else. She also definitely likes it a lot, she didn't believe me when I told her I was a virgin afterwards or when I told her it was my first time going down on a girl after she came. I'm not trying to brag at all, I just want to dispel anything about me not measuring up.

I guess my main hangup is that I view sex as the most intimate thing you can do with another, at least physically. She agrees with me on this, and yet she had a one-night stand with a girl she "cares about a lot". I don't like how trivialized sex is nowadays, and I wonder if she had sex with her second and third boyfriends because she really wanted to or just because it's the conventional thing to do (because she only had sex with them a few times each, whereas with me she definitely wants to have sex often).

She of course had feelings for them when she had sex with them, and yet they broke up. The 'traditional' role of sex as the "bonding act" where it cemented one's marriage and established the other as your mate for life is gone. So when it's with me I can't see it meaning anything. Another big thing I realized bothers me is that she doesn't seem to understand how much it bothers me or why it bothers me no matter how I try to state it.

Also
>she will never be able to truly love me and truly be bonded to me
what is oxytocin

>>18719274
Translation : religious folks are trapped in bad marriages

>>18719582
Of course it matters. By having sex with a person you are also sleeping with every other partner said person has come in contact with.
>Is it even possible to find a girl who has a body count less than 3 nowadays who's not a sheltered religious freak?
Some girls are willing to wait until they are married before having sex. That's like finding a unicorn unless you attend a church though.

>>18719792
Not the same anon, but women are murderously cruel towards male virgins, there is an entire internet subculture dedicated to mocking male virgins.
Not all women are like that, but many are, feminists especially. A lot of people like to play retard and pretend this never happens, it happens all the fucking time.

>>18720393
Well logically speaking, sex is the most physically intimate thing you can do with someone, and I'm not sure how you could argue that it wasn't. However, just because it's the most physically intimate thing doesn't automatically make it meaningful. Plenty of meaningless sex happens all the time. Men and women can be in love, get married, and then one time they have sex something happens to where one partner is left feeling used. Men and woman can be boning for decades and yet feel like that "specialness" has gone, even though they're partners for life and they continue having sex.

I'm more of the opinion that sex is as meaningful as the two people make it. You can have sex where it's purely about getting off and relieving the sexual tension. You can have sex where it's like a security blanket and more based off of "I need validation" than out of love. And then you can have the best sex ever, where it's physical intimacy combined with healthy emotional intimacy. Emotional intimacy is the secret ingredient here, and that's where I fully believe her when she says sex with you is different than with anyone else.

I know it bothers you that she doesn't seem to understand your point of view, but have you tried understanding hers? I mean it's not like you have to be the one to use empathy first, really it should be both of you using it at the same time

Really it is a matter of age and guy/gal

Women more than 5 at any age

Men can get away with 1-2 a year younger then 1 every two year 1 every three years etc as the age

>>18720423
I know it happens, and it's a real shame it does. People aren't inferior or broken just because they haven't, willingly or not, had sex yet. I was just taking issue with the fact that the other poster didn't believe someone could be a woman and also take issue with other women mocking men for being virgins

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I'm 24, female.

In my opinion: The less, the better. I'm not attracted at all to "slutty" men... I just find it dirty and it makes me think the guy is just too easy.

1-2 partner would be the maximum for me, 0 is perfect. My partner (first and only boyfriend of 3 years now) was a virgin too when I met him and he was 28 years old. But he's a beautiful man, just very old-fashioned and never interested in casual sex and dating.

I guess virginity in men is only unattractive when it comes from a place of despair. Lots of male virgins desperately CRAVE sex but fail. My man could have had sex if he wanted to, but he didn't care until I came along if that makes sense.

>>18719265
here's some advice:
>people are all different
>because they are different they choose different things.
>the newer the better quality.

Depends on who's asking. Me, I'd be concerned if we got to a sort of more-than-two-a-year, counting from whenever they started having sex. Eventually you get up to like 16 pretty quick and you gotta start asking practical questions-- I don't care, but chicks fly off the fucking handle when you ask those practical questions. Yikes.

In all honesty, it's less the morality that scares me but the trackability. You start losing who had what and who you were protected with, if you're into drugs then what you were messed up on. Have all the coked up sex you want, for sure, just... a guy like me is gonna ask when you got tested last. S'all.

But a few posters are right here, if you have to start using semantics to justify or explain things, you're probably pretty overboard. When you have to ask questions, you know?

>>18720440

My girlfriend and best friend had sex to spite me and thus was the loss of her virginity, am I cuck status yet?

>>18719265
As a teenager, no more than 3. As an adult, no more than your age.

I'm curious what girls think about for a guy.

I've had 19 relationships at 26 (havent dated for a year or so) and have penetrated about about a dozen or so.

Imo for a female anything over double digits makes me feel temporary. I have broken double digits myself but would have happily stopped at the first if I could have made it last. Im not really about just dating someone for sex but tend to get used for that.

>>18720438
>I was just taking issue with the fact that the other poster didn't believe someone could be a woman and also take issue with other women mocking men for being virgins
They think that way for a reason, women have an in-group bias and men don't, and women who are rude cunts on the internet have much more of a voice than women who side with men who are underdogs.

>>18720400
lmao wrong in so many layers
you're getting your info from hollywood I presume

>>18719348
no
also appeal to nature is a falacy iirc

>>18720400
roasty in denial, have fun raising your autistic child when you're in your fucking 70s, dude. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

>>18719265
I don't want someone who has been around much more than me.
24/F, and had one previous partner. Ideally I'd want someone who had less than 3-4 partners (depending on their age), but who isn't virgin anymore. I'd date a virgin or someone with a few more partners, but wouldn't find it ideal. I don't think I'd go double digits.

>>18719265
Seriously asking that to worthless virgins who are permabutthurt against women? good luck, mate.

>>18721476
They're actually right.

While it is true that there is a correlation between number of partners and divorce rate, statistics show that people with 0 partners before marriage (so those who stayed virgins) have very low divorce rates, while those who had 1-4 previous partners have similar rates. It increases drastically beyond that.
Those who wait till marriage, right now, are usually the highly religious ones. When it was more common to wait till marriage, the statistics didn't show that and divorce rate was more homogeneous between those with low number of sexual partners.

It's too many if your partner's number is way bigger than yours because it makes you seem unimportant and inexperienced. So it depends on each person. Also some guys have a fetish for virgins but that's a different thing

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>>18719690
>not naming the y axis

>>18719325

>taking the bait
>calls others kiddo

lurk more

also:

Hi summer
Bi summer

>>18719475
To be fair if a girl said 7 or 8 i'd think a bit less of her i guess

>>18721483

exactly and this is how you know it's shitposting

Im 30yo and I've probably been with 30-40 different women.

Sadly the reality of my life is that I travel around for a living, thus I can never really hold down a serious relationship for long. I date alot and thus end up sleeping with alot of women.
Ironically Im a huge sucker for love and I tend to develop feelings (not clingy) for most of these women and they usually reciprocate. My very wise ex-girlfriend said I love too much :(

I often feel bad whenever I leave a place, because there's usually a trail of brokenhearted women :( I try to make myself a decent human being by never lying about it or promising something I know I cannot keep.

Within a year I will settle back in my home country, how will I find love?? Am I too damaged? :(

>>18721445
Appeal to falacy is also a falacy.

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>turning 30 in a few months
>virgin

>>18721604

how is it bad that you end up with feelings for them when it clearly doesn't stop you from getting feelings for other. that is really ideal, you are able to really like them and move and to the next and really like her etc. Sounds like you focus on the negatives

>>18720440
a key that opens every door is a great key

a door that is opened by any key is a shitty door

its good for an alpha male to be a stud

its bad for an ugly whore to be a slut

your way of thinking is probably a rationalization that you're not atractive enough to get a real alpha male, a real tall muscled man with a good education and money.

that kind of man gets around because he is valuable and you cant get it because youre not

but i love how everyone has their own snowflake explanation for how the laws of nature don't apply to them

>>18721609

not him but how is that even true?

>>18721614
>a key that opens every door is a great key
>a door that is opened by any key is a shitty door
This analogy doesn't make any sense.


A lot of women value a man with good morals that doesn't sleep around. While I love knowing my man is desirable, I also absolutely love knowing that he's not a pussy starved idiot who wants to fuck everything warm enough.

>>18721614
That's a retarded example. Slutty men are too easy and too concerned/interested in sex, it bores me and disgusts me.

I understand that 80% of men are like that or think like, you're a good example. However there are a few rare gems out there that aren't quite like this which makes them so special and attractive.

>your way of thinking is probably a rationalization that you're not atractive enough to get a real alpha male, a real tall muscled man with a good education and money.

I had so many chances and offers like that while growing up. I couldn't care less. Sex is only interesting to me in the context of an intimate relationship and someone I truly care about.

>>18721624
>While I love knowing my man is desirable, I also absolutely love knowing that he's not a pussy starved idiot who wants to fuck everything warm enough.

^ This.

>>18721613
Yes I understand that, but I'm afraid of appearing like a huge manslut to a prospective wife. I mean a serious girl I dated for some time got suspicious when I consistently "made the right moves" with her and she felt visibly upset when I answered her question about how many I've seen before her.

And I would like to share some hard-earned advice, ONS WILL devaluate sex for you eventually, I'm at the point where I feel sick the next morning if I have a ONS. Thats why i stopped having them long time ago.
As a bonus point, women go absolutely apeshit when you refuse to go home with them, it just makes them that more horny for you apparently...

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>>18719552
stfu faggot

before "the sexual revolution" couples courted and dated and sex outside of marriage was highly looked down upon. if sex is "making love" then you saved it for the special someone.

>>18721631
Couples had sex before marriage. People loved more than one person in their life, and a lot of them had sex with multiple people in their lifetime.

>>18721623
A falacy isn't a violation of any rules. They're often dumb, but stating the existence of a falacy doesn't invalidate the argument.

no limit my friend

Ive fucked over 30 girls. Wife banged 8 dudes before me. I still call her out for being gross and banging so many dudes.

>>18721635

He never stated what you wrote he even wrote "also" before which implies that it was more like a statement/note that it is necessarily true but not that it was evidence for it not being true

>>18721631
>before "the sexual revolution" couples courted and dated and sex outside of marriage was highly looked down upon. if sex is "making love" then you saved it for the special someone.
lel

People are probably overall less promiscuous today than back in the day...

Just because they talk about that whole virgin honor shit doesnt make it so....

Hell I've been to a strict muslim country (=medieval culture) on a number of occasions and girls there are just as fucking slutty as you wouldnt believe.

>>18721624
>>18721627


sure a tall muscled man with money charm and an education tries to pick up an ugly girl like you and you will deny him if you find out he slept around.


simple biology=

biology win for a guy= sleep around as much
biology win for a girl= sleep with the best she can

its literally an objective fact of nature. If you cant be bothered to google darwin its not my fault but dont spread lies just because of ur insecurities

>>18721719
>uga booga me monkey me think with dick
>biology win uga booga

Pathetic.

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I'm a guy,
1
I'm a Virgin and actively turn down opportunities so I expect the same out of a future partner
Is that wrong ?

It's much more unrealistic but ideally they've also had 0 dating partners before me.

I don't know, but dating a girl as borderline asexual as I am just makes sense and would make a more healthy relationship I think?

>>18721719
So we are nothing more then what our biology dictates to us?

>>18721744
>I'm a Virgin and actively turn down opportunities so I expect the same out of a future partner

I like you. Stay like this, it's rare and good.

>>18721744
Dont be surprised when she pulls the ol "people change" when you expected something from somebody...

Cool pic i always visualize areas in gta 3..

>>18721719
Idk how other women's experience in college went, but in my experience, I would tell one of my gal pals I was interested in a good-looking guy, and they would say "That guy? Eww, no! He's been with like twenty different girls, stay far away from him. Probably covered in STDs". I can actually think of a specific guy. Tall, muscular, handsome, nice, working on a degree in accounting, and I had a crush on him, but I never acted on it because you could also just tell he slept around and I didn't feel like risking catching something

>>18721757
But what if you two just kept it between you two? You dont want to catch anything... Keep telling yourself that

>>18721719
Of course I'd reject him.

I'm not ugly, I don't have any issues attracting good looking guys. I date only those who are compatible with me on an emotional and intellectual level.

The biology win for a girl is getting a guy to stick around and provide for her during her pregnancy. A guy who sleeps around doesn't do that.
I have zero interest in being someone's 586th girl, both from a moral point of view because I am against casual sex and from a biological point of view because I don't care about being someone's cum dumpster. I'll always pick a guy who slept around less, and desires a stable relationship.

>>18721762
Lol if college taught me anything it's that shit never stays just between two people. A lot of it was like high school all over again. But even if there was the hypothetical situation that I could've boned him and nobody would've found out, still gross. He probably had sex with girls without a condom, god knows how many women he fucked or the kind of women he fucked. Don't get me wrong, I believe guys can have a decent amount of sexual experience without being a manwhore, but sometimes you meet a guy and you can just tell he's been around from his attitude, like you can just feel that he's not interested in getting to know a woman beyond how her vagina feels.

I get that humans have had their long evolutionary past that's given us tendencies and possibly instincts. But at least for me, I don't give a shit if the guy makes money or has status or power. I'm dating a guy that would be pretty lackluster by evolution's standards, yet I don't feel for a second like I've settled or like he's at risk of some guy with a big wallet or a college degree coming along and sweeping me away

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>>18719265
Depends on the person, only you get to decide. Usually the more there are the harder it will be to find a partner if that helps. There is no universal truth about how to live your life unfortunately, you will have to make your own way. Good luck with that

>>18720570

Jeezus dude if you're still with her please get out

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>>18719265
1

>>18721732
>>18721757
>>18721787


sorry i know being unatractive is tough, but grow out of it, its no reason to deny scientific truth

and darwin theory is, like it or not, scientific truth

Me and my gf of 5 years broke up a couple months ago; she was my first. How rare is it for people to only have sex with someone they're in love with, or if they're in a commited relationship? I don't think the whole casual dating/sex thing is for me and I'm wondering if it's even reasonable to look for somone like that these days. 21, and going to university btw

>>18721856
It's not rare if you're ugly, when you're good looking and not an autist it's practically inevitable to fuck a lot during high school, literally hormones make you do it

>>18721865
Maybe my best bet would be looking for other people who've come out of long commited realtionships from highschool lol

>>18719265
1

>>18721854
I'm not unattractive.
In shape, reasonably cute face. I'd say I'm a 7/10.

You don't understand biology. The win for women is finding a mate who can provide and take care for them and their children.
A dude who shows no interest in you isn't attractive.


>>18721856
There are plenty of people like that.

>>18721882
>In shape, reasonably cute face. I'd say I'm a 7/10.

internet translation:
in shape=walks two blocks once per week

cute face=at least some portion of it isnt covered by acne or acne scars

7/10 = 4/10

>>18721903
I work out daily. I'm 135 lbs and 5'8".
I don't have acne, never had. Have a pretty cute face.


Then, dude - if you need to imagine me as an ugly girl to fit your narrative, do it.
I don't especially care.

not to sound like a chest thumping misogynist

but even if you call it a phase, it still sticks that you gave your body and defenses to numerous partners (notice i didnt say men) and it becomes totally reasonable to suspect the soundness of your decision making if I am considering you as a marital candidate.

Basically, just lie. Why waste everyones time with honesty. Lie and never bring it up and hope it buries itself for good. If you expect me to accept your substantial sexual history just like that then you really are as stupid as your sexual history suggests.

>>18719787
Or maybe he's just a free person who wants others to be free as well you controlling piece of shit?

>>18720570
I'm not even a pol-tard but this is the cuckest thing I have ever read.

>>18719268
fpbp

>>18721614
Well, look--see... A man, is like a lock...no... wait... See, a woman is like a lock, and, uh, a man, he's... uh, well men are like keys, they stick their key into the lock, right? So, like, women have lock holes and men put their keys in 'em, so, like, a lock is, uh... um.. a lock is only supposed to open with a key, right? A woman is only supposed to open her legs with a key, right, which is, uh, a man. So a man is supposed to open lots of locks, because that's how keys work, they open lots of locks. It's called a skeleton key, and men are supposed to open lots of locks, which, remember, that means that, uh, women are locks, so a man is supposed to open a lot of women. But opening a woman is like having sex with her, so a man is a key so he has sex with lots of women because a key is for opening a lock, which is a woman, and a woman isn't supposed to have sex before marriage because women are locks, and they're not made to open with a key, well, uh, they're only supposed to open with one key, not a skeleton key that opens every lock, er... I mean, women aren't supposed to be skeleton locks because, well, what kind of fucking whore would that make her?

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>>18719265
god i would tickle her chin with my balls

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>>18719357

>>18719274
I haven't actually researched this but I'd assume that someone who's never had a partner before marriage wouldn't be able to pick red flags and will probably feel like settling down because they'd think that they wouldn't be able to find somebody else. At least this is what I've seen in my group of friends. So take it wit ha grain of salt.